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July 24, 2018
6 weeks old!
Maxley had a rough night, the 3 of us didn’t sleep much. He was really not himself and cried a lot. He had really bad reflux and just wasn’t happy. I think it was the stimulation of the new bed and all the changes with that. He was more himself today and so I hope tonight goes better.
Mom and I got a lot done today with a few errands we had to run away from the hospital and back at my house. It’s never easy being at my house, I don’t know how I will move back there. It’s so vivid of us being there since we just moved in.
We also stopped by the cemetery to see Scott. I was able to spend some time with him, just us. I tried asking for guidance and to show me that he isn’t angry that he is gone. I can not get over the fact that he isn’t angry. I would be so mad if it were me and I can’t imagine he isn’t mad he didn’t get to meet his son. He wanted this more than anything in the world and I know he would be pissed at whoever took that away from him.
I think it will take time to understand that he is ok, he is happy and he has accepted it.
For now, I grieve. I grieve all day everyday.
Maxley had a rough night, the 3 of us didn’t sleep much. He was really not himself and cried a lot. He had really bad reflux and just wasn’t happy. I think it was the stimulation of the new bed and all the changes with that. He was more himself today and so I hope tonight goes better.
Mom and I got a lot done today with a few errands we had to run away from the hospital and back at my house. It’s never easy being at my house, I don’t know how I will move back there. It’s so vivid of us being there since we just moved in.
We also stopped by the cemetery to see Scott. I was able to spend some time with him, just us. I tried asking for guidance and to show me that he isn’t angry that he is gone. I can not get over the fact that he isn’t angry. I would be so mad if it were me and I can’t imagine he isn’t mad he didn’t get to meet his son. He wanted this more than anything in the world and I know he would be pissed at whoever took that away from him.
I think it will take time to understand that he is ok, he is happy and he has accepted it.
For now, I grieve. I grieve all day everyday.
Stacy Holling — 2/18/19
Scott will always be there in your heart! You will just need to remind Maxley how much his dad would have loved him
lisa ventura olson — 7/26/18
Sweet Kelsey, you are not alone because Scott will always be in your heart & watching from heaven. Life isn’t fair & you have experienced that. I like to think that all our questions will be answered. At least I hope so!
Yvonne Dejager — 7/26/18
I don’t even know you and I think your doing amazing job being both parents Scott is watching over you both with his big grin
Mb Ross — 7/25/18
Trish Chard — 7/25/18
Hon I honestly don’t think Scottie is angry because I want to believe he is watching down and seeing the wonderful job you are doing as both MOM and DAD to Maxley 😘
He talks to Maxley! Look at Maxley’s smile 😊 I have never ever seen a little one smile so much and so knowingly.
I think he is sad that he can’t be there to hold you both but knows how your Mom and the rest of your family are filling in for him!
He is probably also sad to feel your sadness!!
Hold Strong Sweetheart .......think on the happier times and hold on to them. Your LOVE for Maxley and for Scott and your COURAGE will get you through. WE ALL LOVE YOU 😘 ♥️
He talks to Maxley! Look at Maxley’s smile 😊 I have never ever seen a little one smile so much and so knowingly.
I think he is sad that he can’t be there to hold you both but knows how your Mom and the rest of your family are filling in for him!
He is probably also sad to feel your sadness!!
Hold Strong Sweetheart .......think on the happier times and hold on to them. Your LOVE for Maxley and for Scott and your COURAGE will get you through. WE ALL LOVE YOU 😘 ♥️