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I just wanted you to know I didn't forget Gabbie's birthday yesterday. I came to the website and read it and was ready to sign the guestbook and of course had to give one of the kids attention and my laptop got put aside.
It's hard to imagine it's been so long to me. I feel your sorrow and pain and wish I could make it better for you.
I pray for you and think of you and Gabbie often.
Hugs,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <desbernhardt@msn.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Friday, November 18, 2005 12:47 AM CST
Hello Paquette family. My name is Kristin. I was a nursing assistant at Children's in Minneapolis and took care of Gabbie while she was a patient. I ran into your website through another family and couldn't believe my eyes -- it's the Paquettes! I am now a nurse in peds oncology in Madison, WI. I have thought of your family often over the years and wondered how you were doing. (Aubrey is such a little lady now -- so grown up!) I will continue to keep you all in my thoughts and prayers as you heal and grow together. God's peace...
Kristin Hoffman <leighnut@mac.com>
Middleton, WI United States - Friday, November 18, 2005 1:14 AM CST
Just wanting you to know that you are remembered and prayed for today more than usual. Blessings in Christ.
KhalitaDuke Peds BMT Aplastic Anemia <khalita@yahoo.com>
Lexington, NC - Thursday, November 17, 2005 11:27 PM CST
Monica, John, Aubrey and little Noah,
What lovely words from your heart for your precious
Saint Gabrielle.
My heart is so heavy today that sweet little Gabbie is not with you. I know you are comforted knowing she is in His glory in heaven... but I am still so sorry she is not with you physically today and every day.
With heartfelt thoughts and prayers for you and your family always, becasue dear Gabbie -and her family- will always be in my heart.
What a loving and gentle soul is hers..
And one so very much loved by her dear family, friends and even those she had never met.
Love Sara
The Hammers <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Thursday, November 17, 2005 10:20 PM CST
John, Monica, Aubrey, Noah, & Saint Gabbie~
Your family has been in my thoughts so much today..
I lit a candle in memory of Gabbie this morning and it is still burning.
My thoughts & prayers are with you all!!
God Bless...
Give the kids a hug from me
Lots of love to your family!
Angel Sheryl
Sheryl Gunzenhauser <mik181@mchsi.com>
Winnebago, Mn - Thursday, November 17, 2005 9:16 PM CST
Happy 6th Birthday Gabbie! I couldn't let today go by without letting you and your family know that I was thinking about you!
Laura Fraser - Angel Mitchell's Mommy <laura_john_fraser@sympatico.ca>
Bowmanville, On Canada - Thursday, November 17, 2005 8:22 PM CST
Thinking of you all today, God bless.
Robin Boger
Lewisville, NC - Thursday, November 17, 2005 8:05 PM CST
Happy 6th Earthly Birthday Sweet Dear Gabrielle ... My hearts ache along with your family's ... Monica, please know you are always on my mind - God Bless you and hold you close during this heart aching time ... Thank you Gabbie for teaching me so much ... In His Arms ... Rebekah
Rebekah Clark <mommy_jaden@yahoo.com>
Prior Lake, mn usa - Thursday, November 17, 2005 7:19 PM CST
Dear Paquette Family,
Your tribute to Gabbie is beautiful.
You guys are in my thoughts, prayers and heart today - Gabbie's 6th Birthday. My candle is lit for Gabbie's quiet, gentle & sweet soul. Happy Birthday Gabbie.
((HUGS))
Jenn Hartley <ronjenn696@prodigy.net>
Bensalem, PA USA - Thursday, November 17, 2005 1:07 PM CST
How can I add anything to Noah's words? For those few words are the complete truth. Just wishing that Gabbie didn't have to absent from her Mama's arms to be at her eternal home. Thoinking of you with love and prayers today, Kathy
Kathy Welch <abbysmamaa@yahoo.com>
Lexington, Ohio - Thursday, November 17, 2005 12:53 AM CST
Praying for an extra portion of peace for the Paquette family today, on St. Gabrielle's birthday.
Love, Monte and Ivy Ervin <the-ervin-family@earthlink.net>
Mansfield, Oh - Thursday, November 17, 2005 12:38 AM CST
Dear Paquette Family,
Just wanted you to know that all of you are in our thoughts and prayers today, Gabbie's birthday. As we've said before, she's truly a special girl who has touched all of our hearts. We will remember her forever.
Love, The Nielsens
J. Nielsen
Minneapolis, MN USA - Thursday, November 17, 2005 12:20 AM CST
Monica,
Just had to stop in again and let you know that I am praying for you and your family today.
Always remembering Gabbie,
Debbie Nagy <nagyhome@sbcglobal.net>
St. Louis, - Thursday, November 17, 2005 11:19 AM CST
Thinking of you and remembering Gabbie's birthday.
Mary Kay & Dave Knox <DMK542@juno.com>
Brookyn Park, MN - Thursday, November 17, 2005 10:31 AM CST
Dear Monica,
Remembering a very special little girl. My prayers are with you today.
God bless,
Michelle
Michelle Rice <michelle.rice@gpmlaw.com>
Forest Lake, MN - Thursday, November 17, 2005 10:14 AM CST
My thoughts and prayers are with you all as you mark the passage of this day.
Liz Janicki
- Thursday, November 17, 2005 9:13 AM CST
HAPPY BIRTHDAY GABBIE. I miss you and love you.
Love, Aunt Sarah
Sarah Totall
St. Louis Park, MN - Thursday, November 17, 2005 8:55 AM CST
Dearest Monica,
Thinking of you and praying for you on this very difficult day. I know you rejoice that Gabbie is with Jesus, but that in no way diminishes the hurt and loss you feel here on earth.
With all my love,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, OH - Thursday, November 17, 2005 7:31 AM CST
Happy Birthday Sweet Gabrielle. You are alive in so many of us...but oh how we long to hold you and hug you.
Love, Mary
Mary Akagi <b.akagi@worldnet.att.net>
Maple Grove, MN - Thursday, November 17, 2005 6:29 AM CST
Remembering Gabbie for her beautiful blond curly hair, her wise blue eyes and her pure soul tonight. How can it be that a little one I never had the opportunity to meet in this lifetime could have such a profound impact on me? I don't know, but our Father knows.
Although it's hard, I realize the older I get not to question His ways, and who he puts in our path.
Monica, John and family, I wish there was something to say that would make your hearts lighter, but I know there isn't. Just know you are in my thoughts and my prayers.
Mari Beth Ross <jerryandmaribethross@comcast.net>
Hugo, MN - Wednesday, November 16, 2005 10:17 PM CST
Hi- I just wanted to tell you all that you are in my heart. I know this is a time of reflection and grief. I am praying that tommorrow you are filled with happy memories of precious Gabbie. She was/is a gift from God that I know is keeping a watchful eye of her family. I don't know if you have ever heard the song "Held" by Natalie Grant. But if you haven't try and listen to it. I play it over and over again. We get through the toughest times because we are held, and God promised us that he would never abandon us. I also wanted to share with you my favorite scripture as of late.
"We are pressed on every side by troubles, but we are not crushed and broken. We are perplexed, but we don't give up and quit. We are hunted down, but God never abandons us. We get knocked down, but we get up again and keep going." 2 Corinthians 4:8-9
I have read this verse over and over and it gives me comfort. I hope it does the same for you!
I will continue to pray for peace and comfort for you and your precious family
Love-
Rachele and Zach <rlaco2001@yahoo.com>
Shakopee, MN - Wednesday, November 16, 2005 9:04 PM CST
Dear Monica, just wanted to let you know that you are on my heart and in my prayers...especially right now. I understand that it just never gets easier. I continue to remind myself of the joy our babies are expierencing every single second, now that they are healed and with Jesus. I'll be holding you all close in prayer. In Him
jan livingstone (andy's mom forever)
- Wednesday, November 16, 2005 8:26 PM CST
Dearest Paquette's, I hold you very tight in my prayers tonight as precious Gabrielle's birth anniversary approaches. May you all be blessed with a special kind of peace and a special kind of joy that can only come from the presence of God.
In His Love Always,
Yolanda
Yolanda Rogers <galatians5@truevine.net>
Altamonte Springs, FL USA - Wednesday, November 16, 2005 5:00 PM CST
Monica and John,
You have been in my thoughts very much lately as you approach Gabbie's birthday anniversary. I know how very much you miss her and wish she was right here celebrating her birthday with you. My prayers are with you always, that you feel God's love and that you feel God's strength getting you through each day until you are reunited with dear Gabbie.
Jen
Jen Buckentine ~ Zachary's Page ~ <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud , MN - Tuesday, November 15, 2005 12:26 AM CST
Monica,
Praying for you and John as I am sure that Thursday is a "more difficult" day than most. I look at the picture of Gabbie at the top of the web site and just cannot imagine living without such a beautiful child. I know my heart would grieve every single day if I lost one of my boys. Those that think you should be past it, or over it by now, would surely take back their words if they ever experienced the death of a child. I am so sorry that you have to go on without Gabbie. I am sure the day of her birth and the joy it brought is overshadowed by her death and the suffering she endured. Please know that Gabbie has touched me deeply. Her beauty and silent tears are forever etched on my heart. I have told her story many times about how she asked you "will you be 'dere?", and how you explained that she would have to go first, but you would follow. She is resting peacefully waiting to be reunited with you and what a glorious day that will be!! Praying for you always.
Love,
Debbie Nagy <nagyhome@sbcglobal.net>
St. Louis, - Tuesday, November 15, 2005 11:33 AM CST
I know that this is a week that may be more difficult for you than most. Know that although I don't sign in nearly as often as I would like, you are constantly in my thoughts and prayers and I treasure your friendship tremendously. Blessings in Christ.
KhalitaDuke Peds BMT Aplastic Anemia <khalita@yahoo.com>
Lexington, NC - Sunday, November 13, 2005 10:52 PM CST
Dear Monica,
My heart sank when I read how Aubrey denied Gabby in your last posting. That too is one of my biggest fears. It would be extreme sadness/disappointment, not anger towards Aubrey. Monte has purposely not mentioned Luke a couple of times when people have asked how many kids we have and I have stepped in to "remind" him of LUke (gently of course). How can one deny another's very prescence?... He says he just wants to avoid questioning/pity from the other person, which I do understand after thinking about it. So far Joscelyn hasn't ignored Luke, but I do know of several circumstances where she had to explain (more than she should) to her classmates/friends about what happened and where he is. Many kids have no idea what happens when you die- they have gotten ideas of horror, blood and gore off of movies and tv which is so wrong. And of course many have no idea of God's love for them and us so this has been a great tool to let Josc. "evangelize" them at the tender age of 6. I know the Spirit is with her b/c she has been very steadfast when having to correct some kids who tried to tell her that God must have killed Lukie. She told them "no, the devil did but God took him to heaven and I get to go there one day because Jesus died for me!" We were SO PROUD of her!! Anyhow, it is certainly not an easy thing to do so maybe Aubrey was keeping quiet to avoid more interrogation about the situation. We love you very much Monica and pray for all of you, especially with Gabby's birthday coming up. May God's peace and love surround you profoundly in the days ahead. Remembering with compassion...
Monte and Ivy Ervin <the-ervin-family@earthlink.net>
Mansfield, Oh - Friday, November 11, 2005 10:27 AM CST
Monica-
My daughter is/was (it changes daily) in a group of 3 girls and I can't believe how catty they are - to eachother! Age wise, Sierra is almost a full year older than the other 2 girls and so there is a maturity level thing there. When Sierra tells the other 2 they need to stop before they run across the road, they think she's being bossy and they exclude her. It's stuff like that that happen during the school day as well. Thank Heaven's Sierra is not in the same room as the other 2. I've brought the issue up to the teacher and she said it is noticeable in school as well and Sierra's whole attitude changes when she knows it's time to walk to daycare with those 2. It is good that the teachers have acknowledged that there's an issue. Even though it's not something we want to hear, it's good that the problem can be addressed as quickly as possible. The teachers say that this stuff if happening earlier and earlier. Yikes. Sierra's in first grade and this stuff was actually happening already when she was 4 and in preschool.
I'm so sorry about Aubrey putting a "0" for sister. I'm sure that hurts you so deeply. I do believe that Aubrey will never, ever forget Gabbie and the memories she has of her. . .
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
Gaylord, MN USA - Monday, November 7, 2005 8:46 AM CST
Dear Monica,
As difficult as it is to see her put "0" for sisters, I think it's pretty normal for kids to think right now. Eventually she will be saddened by all that she has missed out on without having her sister around. My sister died very soon after she was born. I never included her in things like that either but as I got older, I realized and was sad about the relationship I missed out on. I'm sure that doesn't make seeing that any easier.
Take care!
Hugs,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <desbernhardt@msn.com>
Zimmerman, MN USA - Sunday, November 6, 2005 11:15 AM CST
Monica,
How that just breaks my heart and made me cry to think of you seeing the "0 sisters" on the paper..
And yes, Gabbie does have the most beautiful soul, and I can only imagine how horrible it is for you to not be with her. It breaks my heart so much.. and so I cannot even imagine what it does to yours, dear Monica.
Please know I pray for you and your family always--and esp during this incredibly difficult time of year for you.
With tears,
Sara
PS Prayers also for dear Aubrey as she tries to find her way
in school. I really think everything will turn out okay.
I also will pray that her medical situation will get better
soon too.
The Hammers <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Saturday, November 5, 2005 10:51 PM CST
Mon,
Thanks for the updates, we are still praying for Aubrey's return to 100% health!
Have a blessed weekend...
Love,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose, weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Friday, November 4, 2005 2:11 PM CST
Hi Monica,
Glad to hear you and John had a nice date night.
It is so important to do that whenever we can--even though our lives get so busy! :o)
I too love that precious picture of sweet little Gabbie.
Those extraordinarily loving eyes of hers show the
window to her beautiful soul.
PS Aubrey's and Noah's pictures are precious too--I can't forget to mention them! :o)
Love and Blessings,
The Hammer's
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Wednesday, November 2, 2005 6:23 PM CST
Monica,
I love that picture of solemn Gabrielle, even though she is not smiling. She is so beautiful. As is the new picture of Aubrey! She is getting so grown up. I'm glad to hear that you and John had a night out to yourselves - that is important to do every once in a while! Thank you for your constant support. It means so much to us.
Love,
Jen
Jen Buckentine ~ Zachary's Page ~ <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Wednesday, November 2, 2005 12:59 AM CST
Hi Monica!
Glad you had a nice weekend and that you and John went out on a "date". Bob and I used to do that once a week and then when money got tight we stopped. Money is still tight, but we really need to get back to going out, even if it is just Taco Bell. Your journal entry made me think and now I will try to make it a priority. This is a busy time of year, so maybe we'll start on Jan. 1st. Anyway, enough about that...glad that you were able to enjoy adult conversation. I know you miss Gabbie every moment of every day, but I am sure that certain days and times of the year are more difficult than others. Always remembering you in prayer.
Love,
Debbie Nagy <nagyhome@sbcglobal.net>
St. Louis, - Wednesday, November 2, 2005 9:09 AM CST
LOVE ALWAYS BRENDA My Loving Dad's Site <brurka@shaw.ca>
EDMONTON,ALBERTA CANADA, - Monday, October 31, 2005 11:19 PM CST
Hey Monica-
Glad to hear that the family is starting to feel better.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
Gaylord, MN USA - Monday, October 31, 2005 3:06 PM CST
Praise God! I'm so glad your family is on the mend. Your family has been on my heart!
Hope you have a great week!
Hugs!
Rachele and Zach <rlaco2001@yahoo.com>
Shakopee, mn - Monday, October 31, 2005 8:36 AM CST
Please pray for Brant Hamilton and his family(caringbridge/ia/brant_thomas). He is SOOOOO beautiful and should be joining Gabbie any moment now. Thank you, Mrs. Paquette, for all you do. Keep proclaiming the Gospel 'til He comes!!
Love in Christ,
Laurie Wilkey
Laurie Wilkey
Urbana, IL USA - Friday, October 28, 2005 5:06 PM CDT
Hope everyone begins to feel a little better . . .
Michele G. Spencer
- Thursday, October 27, 2005 9:29 AM CDT
Hey Monica-
It's nice to hear that another mom over-cooks the meat as well. I'm so overly paranoid to make sure to get the meat done that everyone knows it's more apt to be burnt, than what some consider to be "just right". :0)
I so hope things are better by the end of the week.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
Gaylord, MN USA - Tuesday, October 25, 2005 9:21 AM CDT
Hi Monica!
I'm glad John & Aubrey are feeling better..maybe it was caused from something eaten at the wedding? Four years ago at my sister-in-laws wedding 5 of us ended up getting sick that night..since there was so many of us sick we figured it was something we had all eaten.
((HUGS)) Today is one more day closer to your Gabbie.
Thank You for your friendship.
Jenn Hartley <ronjenn696@prodigy.net>
Bensalem, PA USA - Tuesday, October 25, 2005 6:58 AM CDT
Dear Monica,
My heart and prayers go out to you--and Aubrey and John.
I hope the Medicals get it figured out asap and that their symptoms will pass very soon!
You have our prayers. Thank you for keeping everyone posted! We care about your family very much as do so many others. It is a honor to pray for you.
My Love,
Sara
The Hammers <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Sunday, October 23, 2005 10:59 PM CDT
Monica and John,
I'm sorry to read that Aubrey and John are both having the cramping and passing blood. That must be very stressful, not knowing the reason why. I know you put all of your trust in our Lord, but you are still human and I know that you must be worried. I will certainly be praying that you will get answers soon and that this can be treated and go away quickly. Take care you guys!
May God bless you and keep you, may His eyes shine upon you, may God give you peace.
Love,
Jen and family
Jen Buckentine Zachary's Site <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Sunday, October 23, 2005 9:10 PM CDT
Monica, I was out of town on business last week and have just gotten a chance to read your journals. I am so very sorry that Aubrey and your family is having to go through this. Hopefully, it is a good sign that John is exhibiting some of the same symptons (certainly I don't wish anything on him but maybe suggests some type of stomach bug???)? We will keep you in our prayers that you will have an answer soon and everyone will be healthy once again. It really is unbearable for your child to be bleeding and in pain while there seems to be nothing you can do to help...and it is truly unbearable that you have already been through this with your precious Gabbie. Again, I am so very sorry
Robin Boger
Lewisville, NC - Sunday, October 23, 2005 7:47 PM CDT
I am so sorry you guys are having to go through this stressful medical situation. Know that you continue to be in my prayers. I'll check on you again soon. Blessings in Christ.
KhalitaDuke Peds BMT Aplastic Anemia <khalita@yahoo.com>
Lexington, NC - Sunday, October 23, 2005 7:40 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
Today I am thinking of your family. The uncertainty always puts us among foggy fear, yet we know and have the ONE who has given us the eternal certainty. Thank you for sharing your solid belief. I pray that symptoms of Aubrey’s and John’s will be relieved soon. I also pray that God’s peace and strength be with you and Noah, with hugs and love.
“My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.” (Psalms 73:26)
Benjamin, Paulina, Erin (Forever Family with ~Esther~) <Mercy2Live@yahoo.com>
Fairborn, OH US - Saturday, October 22, 2005 1:35 PM CDT
Hi Guys-
Thinking about you and hoping things are going better for Aubrey. You guys are in our thoughts and prayers always.
Rachele and Zach
Rachele <rlaco2001@yahoo.com>
Shakopee, MN - Friday, October 21, 2005 0:18 AM CDT
Monica,
I am SO VERY sorry to read that Aubrey is having pain and bleeding. I can only imagine the tension and fear that are created by this. I hope by now you have some answers to what "more" is going on. PRAYING for all of you.
Love,
Debbie Nagy <nagyhome@sbcglobal.net>
- Thursday, October 20, 2005 10:37 AM CDT
I am so sorry to hear about Aubrey's latest health concerns. Please know that I am praying for your entire family. I pray that it is something minor that will resolve quickly.
Emily Miller <fiddlecat3@yahoo.com>
St. Paul, MN - Wednesday, October 19, 2005 11:52 PM CDT
Praying for Aubrey.........love, Kathy
Kathy Welch <abbysmamaa@yahoo.com>
Lexington, Ohio - Wednesday, October 19, 2005 7:11 PM CDT
Monica-
I'm so sorry to hear about the stuff going on with Aubrey. I'll pray that it's something that can be taken care of easily (if possible). Stay strong, Monica, stay strong. I hope the pain for Aubrey is better today. . .
Keep FROGing. . .
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
Gaylord, MN USA - Wednesday, October 19, 2005 2:52 PM CDT
Monica,
I'm so sorry Aubrey is having health problems.. I pray they are nothing severe.
((HUGS))
Jenn Hartley <ronjenn696@prodigy.net>
Bensalem, PA USA - Wednesday, October 19, 2005 6:11 AM CDT
My heartfelt prayers are with you tonight...
Love, Mary
Mary Akagi <b.akagi@worldnet.att.net>
Maple Grove, MN - Tuesday, October 18, 2005 8:55 PM CDT
Prayers for Aubrey (as well as Mom and Dad!)
Natalie Martin-Rak (www.caringbridge.com/fl/lina) <natalie@dentxllc.com>
St. Augustine, fl - Tuesday, October 18, 2005 8:52 PM CDT
Monica-
I stopped by to say hello, and after reading your post I am very concerned for Aubrey. I will remember her in prayer and I will check back soon. Love to you all.
Michelle E.
Clear Lake, WI - Tuesday, October 18, 2005 7:35 PM CDT
Oh Monica! Oh Aubrey!!! We are praying...we are hoping in the Lord...we are trusting that He has you all in the palm of his hands...
Much love,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose, weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Tuesday, October 18, 2005 2:21 PM CDT
HAPPY BIRTHDAY MISS AUBREY!!
I hope you have a wonderful day sweetie!!
Lots of Angel Hugs to you from me :o)
Love,
Angel Sheryl
Sheryl Gunzenhauser <mik181@mchsi.com>
Winnebago, Mn - Monday, October 17, 2005 1:55 PM CDT
Happy Birthday Aubrey!! We hope you have a great day!!
Love, Shannon and Spencer Hujanen <hujanenfamily@mcleodusa.net>
Blaine, MN USA - Monday, October 17, 2005 10:21 AM CDT
Happy Birthday Miss Aubrey! Hope you have a great party! You are a beautiful young lady, inside and out. With love from Ohio, Kathy
Kathy Welch <abbysmamaa@yahoo.com>
Lexington, Ohio - Saturday, October 15, 2005 4:06 PM CDT
Happy "early" Birthday Aubrey!! Hope your party tomorrow is lots of fun.
Love,
Debbie Nagy <nagyhome@sbcglobal.net>
St. Louis, - Friday, October 14, 2005 9:54 PM CDT
Thinking of you all today!
Natalie Martin-Rak (www.caringbridge.com/fl/lina) <natalie@dentxllc.com>
St. Augustine, fl - Friday, October 14, 2005 6:36 AM CDT
Dear Monica,
Sorry you missed Aubrey walking down the aisle. I'll be praying that her counts are much better this time. This has to be very scarey for both you and John. I am so thankful that you know Jesus and have your trust in Him.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, - Thursday, October 13, 2005 10:54 AM CDT
Hi!
I'm sorry you missed the wedding ceremony..the positive side is that you got to spend that extra time alone with Noah! :o)
It turns my stomach that there are eating contests out there..and professional eaters, too. There are so many starving people......
Your family is always in my heart.
Jenn Hartley <ronjenn696@prodigy.net>
Bensalem, PA USA - Thursday, October 13, 2005 7:48 AM CDT
ALWAYS IN MY THOUGHTS AND PRAYERS
LOVE ALWAYS BRENDA My Loving Dad's Site <brurka@shaw.ca>
EDMONTON,ALBERTA CANADA, - Wednesday, October 12, 2005 10:32 PM CDT
Hey Monica-
Just letting you know I was here.
Have a good day!
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
Gaylord, MN USA - Wednesday, October 12, 2005 2:15 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
Just yesterday I was reading an article in a different publication about a competitive eating contest involving buffalo wings. Apparently, there are amateur and professional eaters out there. There's even a waffle eating contest. It is sad and disturbing.
Have fun at the wedding on Saturday. Be sure to pack some fun stuff to keep Noah entertained.
God bless,
Michelle
Michelle Rice <michelle.rice@gpmlaw.com>
Forest Lake, MN - Friday, October 7, 2005 8:21 AM CDT
Although the picture on front page was taken in hospital, I see such a beautiful soul in Gabrielle from the photo. It is something which is only granted by God and will never apart from you neither by time nor by place.
Aubrey and your family are remembered in our prayer and thoughts. May peace and strength from our Heavenly Father continue to be with you.
Benjamin, Paulina, Erin (Forever Family with ~Esther~) <Mercy2Live@yahoo.com>
Fairborn, OH US - Friday, October 7, 2005 1:13 AM CDT
I will be praying that you will be able to keep Aubrey's face bruise free, but if not, she will still be beautiful. Your two minutes apart statement about the Tribune was "right on". When will this country wake up and realize that abortion is murder? God, we are humbly praying, please, please, heal our land. Amen.
Love,
Debbie Nagy <nagyhome@sbcglobal.net>
- Thursday, October 6, 2005 10:47 PM CDT
Hi Monica,
Just wanted to say Hello and let you know that your journeling *always* touches my heart.
Prayers for Aubrey!
With Love,
Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN - Thursday, October 6, 2005 7:54 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
Praying for you today. May God continue to heal Aubrey's body and lift this fear and burden from your heart. Praying also for your family and the church situation.
Love,
Debbie Nagy <nagyhome@sbcglobal.net>
St. Louis, - Tuesday, October 4, 2005 8:40 AM CDT
Hey Monica-
Just letting you know I was here. Hope your weekend was ok.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
Gaylord, MN USA - Monday, October 3, 2005 8:18 AM CDT
I am so glad you found my daughter Kendall's web page. Kendall is really a ray of hope for any child with ITP because she has had it for so long and now has had 6 consecutive months of normal counts. Praise the Lord!! I truly think it is possible for Aubrey as well. You are obviously a very strong family and also I can tell you have a great love for the Lord. It wasn't until I truly gave Kendall's situation to the Lord, that I started to see a real improvment. All of your daughters are beautiful. Gabrielle was a very strong little girl to endure what she went through. I am sure she is having a ball in the streets of Heaven now. May the Lord be with you and your family always!
Tonya, Kendall's mom <t_farthing@hotmail.com>
Odon, IN US - Friday, September 30, 2005 1:17 PM CDT
Monica, I can imagine you and John expected the worst when you saw all those bruises. So this is something kids can outgorw then I guess? At some point will they get so low they look to transfuse her? I thought they had told us anything under 20k can cause spontaneous bleeding.... if I came home and saw like dry cakes blood in his nostrils I knew we would be getting a transfusion the next day. Keeping you in our prayers
Chris Gooch's mom
- Sunday, September 25, 2005 11:33 AM CDT
Monica,
I still come by and check quite regularly, just don't sign as often. Life is busy lately. Praying for all of you, but especially for Aubrey.
Love,
Debbie Nagy <nagyhome@sbcglobal.net>
- Friday, September 23, 2005 4:50 PM CDT
Love Always
My Loving Dad's Site <brurka@shaw.ca>EDMONTON,ALBERTA CANADA, - Tuesday, September 20, 2005 6:05 PM CDT
I'm so sorry about all Aubrey's bruising incidents and I'm praying for her. It must be very hard to be an acive child and bruise so very badly and easily.
On a cheerier note, remember the Berry Quadruptlets? They are 20 months old now and adorable toddlers. I saw them all at church today and can actually tell them all apart! Since there are two boys and two girls, I at least had a 50% chance of getting them right!
Holly is measuring large for dates, so they are going to do another ultrasound next Tuesday. I am looking forward to Natalie's arrival!
Love, Kathy
Kathy Welch <abbysmamaa@yahoo.com>
Lexington , Ohio - Friday, September 16, 2005 6:54 PM CDT
Hey Monica-
It makes me so sad to read about Aubrey and her bruises. My heart goes out to you along with a ((hug)).
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
Gaylord, MN USA - Friday, September 16, 2005 1:14 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
I will certaintly pray for Aubrey's protection as she wants to run, jump and play.
I always appreciate your wonderful journal entries about Heaven. Heaven our real home! The place where you and your precious Gabbie will be reunited for all enterity and where I will finally meet you both! And as my Daddy's favorite song says "I'll fly away oh Glory!"
With my love beacause of Jesus,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrassswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus , Ohio - Friday, September 16, 2005 12:16 AM CDT
Hi Monica. I am sorry to have been gone so long from the guestbook. I still stop by here weekly. I am also sorry to hear about the battle with low platelets. Hope that gets better soon. I remember how that can cause the equilibrium to be off.
Blessings to your family. :)
Michelle Espeseth
Clear Lake, WI - Thursday, September 15, 2005 7:22 PM CDT
Just wanted to know I'm thinking about you guys. People look at us all the time and wonder about Zach. I wish they would just ask instead of stare or turn there kids away. We as parents don't ever mind talking about it because it brings awareness, and that are kids are im some ways are more of a gift to us. I always get comfort because Zach will always be pure!! Praying that platlets are on the rise!!
Rachele and Zach <rlaco2001@yahoo.com>
- Thursday, September 15, 2005 6:36 PM CDT
Monica,
I know if I lost a child I would feel just the same as you wrote. There is a part of me that died when I lost my father so suddenly five years ago. I have never been the same since that day. I can't even imagine how much more that feeling would be if it had been my child. Praying for you always.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
- Tuesday, September 13, 2005 5:40 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
Thinking of you today and always.
The Scotts lost Baby Allie a year ago today. Please take time to remember them and sign their guestbook if you can. http://www.scotthousehold.com
I also paid tribute to Allie on Zachary's page. http://www.caringbridge.com/mn/zacharybern
Thank you for the kind words in Zachary's guestbook.
Hugs,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <desbernhardt@msn.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Tuesday, September 13, 2005 2:05 PM CDT
We hope in the Lord and hope that any possible genetic autoimmune stuff stays away!!!! Thanks for the update, we've been praying all weekend...
Love,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose, weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Sunday, September 11, 2005 8:54 PM CDT
Oh Monica, I hadn't read Gabbie's website for a week and I am so sorry to read what you and Aubrey have been going through! While I am so very thankful that it is not Leukemia, I am sorry that you will all have to deal with this condition for several months. I imagine that going back to Children's as a patient must have evoked many memories and some strong emotions. I still have vivid memories of seeing your family there and little, quiet Gabrielle just sitting in her stroller as you walked around the halls.
We're so thankful that Aubrey's condition should be manageable, but will definitely keep Aubrey and all of you in our prayers for no complications and complete recovery. God bless you.
Love,
Jen
Jen Buckentine Zachary's Site <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Sunday, September 11, 2005 8:41 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
I am happy to hear the appt went well. I was praying for you all and still am.
Poor baby Avery has lost her battle. She had been waiting for a heart transplant and got it last week. It was not to be and she passed away on Friday. Her website is: http://www3.caringbridge.org/ny/averysheart/index.htm Please pray for this family.
I have paid tribute to the victims of 9/11 as well as my brother who passed away ten years ago on Zachary's site.
I will pray that Aubrey continues to do well.
Hugs to you!!
God Bless,
Susan
http://www.caringbridge.com/mn/zacharybern
Susan Bernhardt <desbernhardt@msn.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Sunday, September 11, 2005 9:34 AM CDT
I'm sorry it's been so long since I've signed in. I have had experience with ITP since I have been around the hem/onc world for so long and have known several people with the disease. Although many of them have to get high dose IVIG, everyone I know has done ok. Please know that I will be praying for you guys regarding this. Know that I love you dearly regardless of how often I sign in. HUGS!
Khalita Duke Peds BMT Aplastic Anemia <khalita@yahoo.com>
Lexington, NC - Saturday, September 10, 2005 6:29 PM CDT
Continuing to pray for Aubrey. Monica, you are so strong and faithful to our Lord, may He continue to bless you and your family greatly.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, - Saturday, September 10, 2005 4:57 PM CDT
We're praying and hoping today went well...
Love to you,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose, weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Friday, September 9, 2005 8:48 PM CDT
Aubrey-
I'm thinking about you and praying hard for you today. Hope all goes well.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
Gaylord, MN USA - Friday, September 9, 2005 10:17 AM CDT
Dear Monica,
Aubrey and your family are in my heart and prayers today. I hope the diagnosis is the less severe one and that she will be ok in no time!
((HUGS))
Jenn Hartley <ronjenn696@prodigy.net>
Bensalem, PA USA - Friday, September 9, 2005 9:07 AM CDT
Dear Monica,
I've been very remiss in signing the guestbook lately. I do read and keep up with your enteries.
I'm so sorry to read about Aubrey's diagnosis, but ever so thankful that it's NOT cancer- Praise God for that!
Hope Aubrey has a most enjoyable first day of First Grade. I'm sorry that Gabbie isn't there to enjoy it a first day of school too. I wish with all my heart that she could have been cured here on earth. I'm thankful though that I know I'll get to meet her in Heaven someday.
With Love and Prayers because of His Grace,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Friday, September 9, 2005 8:37 AM CDT
Hello my friend... just wanted to sign in and let you know that I am praying for little Aubrey, you and John. I can only imagine the scare the two of you had! It's ALWAYS in the back of our minds, isn't it?!?!?! After everything my Andy went thru, I can barely handle seeing my little babies even get their shots. They cling to me, so trusting...just like Andy did. The memories of holding my oldest child, while he got spinal taps, brings the tears over and over again. Praising God that he never has to face any of that again. You'll be on my heart tomorrow. God bless you all.
jan livingstone (Andy's mom forever)
- Thursday, September 8, 2005 8:33 PM CDT
I'll be praying for Aubrey. Our oldest daughter, Rebecca, had ITP when she was 16. By the time we finally got a diagnosis, her platelets had almost been eaten up completely and she was in pretty bad shape. I think we came close to losing her that night. Anyway, after some bigtime steroids and gamma globulin IVs, she got better slowly. She is 25 now and as healthy as can be. Aubrey will be fine too. :)
Jo and Robert <jvonschoeler@cox.net>
Crestview, FL - Thursday, September 8, 2005 8:13 PM CDT
Monica, we will be thinking of you tomorrow and of course, keeping Aubrey in our prayers. You are right, both of your precious children have been through so much. I am so very sorry and we will pray that her condition is easily treatable. God bless.
Robin Boger <Robin.Boger@rbc.com>
Lewisville, NC - Thursday, September 8, 2005 8:03 PM CDT
Just sending a bit of good luck wishes for tomm. You guys are a very strong family and I know God is with you during this latest trial. I will pray for a very quick recovery!
God Bless!
Rachele and Zach <rlaco2001@yahoo.com>
- Thursday, September 8, 2005 6:23 PM CDT
Monica,
Prayers to you and your family...both in petition for Aubrey to quickly heal and thanksgiving that its not leukemia. God is asking much of your family and you continue to carry these crosses with grace. We love you all and are with you on this journey towards heaven...be assured of our prayers.
Blessings,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose, weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Thursday, September 8, 2005 4:50 PM CDT
I am so relieved to hear that Aubrey is just fine and it is not what you feared. I can't imagine what must have gone through your minds on that trip to the hospital. I bet taking that picture broke your heart...just the thought of it breaks mine.
Rhonda Meyer <rschultz@scl.doc.state.mn.us>
- Thursday, September 8, 2005 3:51 PM CDT
I was petrified, thinking that Aubrey had leukemia. I'm sure you must have been scared out of your wits. Although ITP is pretty serious (my neice, Alicia had is and was on IVIG for it) it is NOTHING compared to cancer adn i'm sure it is a relief for you. There is another little girl on c.b who has ITP. Her name is Kendall and she is just the cutest child. her website is http://www.caringbridge.org/al/kendall.
I am so sorry. YOu and Gabrielle were robbed of these precious moments. Indeed, I am sure Gabrielle would have loved Kindergarten.
Hillary <xbeautiful_disaster@hotmail.com>
York, PA USA - Thursday, September 8, 2005 1:52 PM CDT
Oh boy, Monica - my heart skipped more than a few beats as I read your latest journal entry! I cannot imagine how difficult that ER trip was for all of you! Even as I was reading, my mind was saying "Please precious Savior, not again" and then,so thankfully,reading of Aubrey's diagnosis; still upsetting as she must stay inactive(and my prayers will surely continue for her) but not devastating. Thank you Lord! Love, Kathy
Kathy Welch <abbysmamaa@yahoo.com>
Lexington, Ohio - Thursday, September 8, 2005 9:43 AM CDT
Just want to add my "amen" to the posts below :-)!
Hugs--Melody
melody bell
baltimore, md - Wednesday, September 7, 2005 2:57 PM CDT
Oh Monica, the fear you and John must have felt for Aubrey must have been unbearable. I am so sorry that you had to go through this, but am so thankful that the diagnosis is not leukemia. I am sure everything that you went through with Gabbie never goes away completely, but the ER experience with Aubrey must have magnified it and brough it to the surface more than ever. I am breathing a sigh of relief for all of you and thanking God that Aubrey WILL be just fine. My prayers will continue.
Love,
Debbie Nagy <nagyhome@sbcglobal.net>
St. Louis, - Wednesday, September 7, 2005 11:41 AM CDT
Hey Monica-
I'm so glad to read that her bruising was not cancer. Wow, I would have brought her to ER as well.
Hopefully her first day of school went well and she was excited for another day today. ((hugs for missing Gabbie)). I'm so sorry. . .
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
Gaylord, MN USA - Wednesday, September 7, 2005 10:36 AM CDT
Dear Monica,
I'm glad Aubrey's diagnosis is not Cancer.. You had me scared reading about her bruises.
Happy First Day of School Aubrey!!
((HUGS)) to your family for the abscense of Gabbie on this day..
Jenn Hartley <ronjenn696@prodigy.net>
Bensalem, PA USA - Wednesday, September 7, 2005 5:58 AM CDT
Dear Monica,
I too am very relieved that Aubrey will be OK and will outgrow this condition! I must admit I was teriffied while reading the entry and hearing about the bruises--until I got to the end to see that she was OK. I am SO relieved.
And you are right, she is in very good hands at Mpls Childrens.
I am also very sad that Gabbie is not here. I can't even begin to imagine how much pain and sorrow is in a mother and father's heart when their beautiful child is not with them on earth.
I miss Gabbie with you. I would love to hold her too.
Even though she is safely in the arms of Jesus my heart still aches for you that she is not with you..
Praying for Aubrey that this condition passes as is expected.
Love,
Sara
The Hammers <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Wednesday, September 7, 2005 0:29 AM CDT
How relieved I am that Aubrey is ok. I wish I had some good ideas about how to keep her inactive...but with two tumbly boys at my home, I am of little help. Gabbie has been on my mind most of the day. It should have been her first day of school too. The little girl I know who shares Gabbie's birthday is in Cameron's kindergarten class this year. I cannot look at her and not think of Gabbie. And I don't think it is a conincidence that this little girl's name is Grace. Gabbie's whole life was filled with grace...what a precious gem. Love, Mary
Mary Akagi <b.akagi@worldnet.att.net>
Maple Grove, MN - Tuesday, September 6, 2005 7:54 PM CDT
Dear Monica & John,
When I read the most recent entry, my heart stopped. I almost couldn't read through to the end as I was afraid for Aubrey. How relieved I was to find out that it was not leukemia! It must have been terrifying for you.
I hope Aubrey will be able to find enough "quiet" things to keep her busy!
Always thinking of you . . .
Janine
Janine Nielsen
Minneaplis, MN USA - Tuesday, September 6, 2005 12:33 AM CDT
Dear Monica,
Happy Belated Birthday!!
How sweet of John to surprise you for lunch!
Jacob & Beebo are in my prayers - what beautiful children!
Jenn Hartley <ronjenn696@prodigy.net>
Bensalem, PA USA - Tuesday, September 6, 2005 6:30 AM CDT
Hello,
I started following Gabbie's site after one of the KARE 11 features. I posted once a long time ago, but I continue to think of her and truly admire your faith.
This time I am also writing because of another little boy (age 4) in need of prayers. He is a surviving twin born premature. He had serious health problems but was miraculously doing very well until this summer. He has stopped breathing several times, and they are very frightened. I do not know this family personally but am sure they would welcome prayers from everyone. His site is:
http://www.caringbridge.org/mn/jer/
Thank you so much.
Emily Miller <fiddlecat3@yahoo.com>
- Sunday, September 4, 2005 9:46 PM CDT
Thinking of you today,
www.postpals.co.uk
Love
Sue
xxxxxx
Sue <orangejammies@hotmail.co.uk>
Colchester, Essex, England - Friday, September 2, 2005 8:26 PM CDT
Hi Monica,
Thank you for "introducing" me to precious Jacob and his website. What a beautiful little boy.
I will keep him in my heart and prayers as well.
Lots of heartfelt prayers going out to the hurricane victims as well. It is so hard to imagine it all and I am only watching it on TV. My heart goes out to them.
Thanks for your continued journeling.
Remembering your sweet, innocent, loving little Gabbie.. ALWAYS,
Love,
Sara
The Hammers <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Thursday, September 1, 2005 11:09 PM CDT
Prayer changes things!! Thank you for putting out the word for Jacob!! God is good- ALL the time!!
Laurie Wilkey
Urbana, IL USA - Wednesday, August 31, 2005 12:11 AM CDT
Hi Monica,
I am at a loss of what to do for the victims of the hurricane. I know monetary is great plus praying but my girl scout troop wants to do something but we can't solicit funds for anything like that.
Being from the south, I understand the devastation they are going through. Luckily I have never had to experience anything like that.
Jacob is doing okay for now. He has even managed to go out on some day passes. If you haven't checked his website, there is the most moving picture of him looking up. http://www2.caringbridge.org/fl/jacob/
Thinking of you!!
Hugs,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <desbernhardt@msn.com>
zimmerman, mn - Tuesday, August 30, 2005 8:21 PM CDT
Hey Monica-
I had issues of my own in church yesterday. lol. Lincoln (turned 1 in April) is always a little pill in church, but I told the girls that we were going to church even if Jon (husband) couldn't go. They said they would help with Lincoln and so off we went. I made sure he ate a good breakfast before we left and he slept longer yesterday morning, so I thought it was going to be ok. We get there and barely sit down and he's talking sooo loud! The older people around us just smiled and well, he did ok during the hour long service, but I had to feed him crackers the entire time! Finally, the last 5 minutes (which can seem like 35 minutes!) he let it all out. I was holding him and he just hollars and puts his arm to his mouth and moves it up and down so he could make the most "lovely" noise. A few kids started laughing when he did this, and so I couldn't get him to stop. At the end of the song, he yells "BYE!!" and starts waving to everyone. Oh, I was so incredibly embarrassed. Everyone used to say "Oh, Becky, we're just glad we hear little voices because if you were home, we wouldn't hear them." Well, needless to say, no one said that yesterday. lol. I just wanted you to know that you are not the only one with church issues. Honestly, I laughed as I read Noah's story as I thought, "Oh, I'm so glad someone else doesn't have a picture perfect child in church."
Have a good day, Monica!
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
Gaylord, MN USA - Monday, August 29, 2005 9:58 AM CDT
Dear Monica,
I laughed out loud reading about Noah & pressing the button...kids are just too funny. Apparently he DID want to push the button! :o)
This summer's end is just too soon. I have enjoyed delivering the newspapers these past few weeks - the sunrises have been spectacular!!
Have a great weekend!
Jenn Hartley <ronjenn696@prodigy.net>
Bensalem, PA USA - Saturday, August 27, 2005 7:23 AM CDT
Monica,
Sorry I haven't signed in much lately, but I do still check on you very regularly. I'm praying that Aubrey will be okay with the bladder situation by the time school starts. Did Noah ever get to PUSH THE BUTTON?!!!?? Blessings and love and prayers as always.
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, - Friday, August 26, 2005 9:23 PM CDT
Thank you so much for putting the word out for Jacob and his family. I don't know them personally, but I KNOW that they very much value the prayers.
I am a very infrequent guestbook signer, but I have to tell you how inspiring I find Gabbie's site. I have been reading it for more than a year and a half and have been praying for your family daily ever since I began. Sometimes the only Scripture I would get during my workday would be the Word that I always found on Gabbie's site. May God continue to comfort you and give you His peace that passes all understanding. With love and prayers, Laurie Wilkey
Laurie Wilkey
Urbana, IL USA - Friday, August 26, 2005 2:58 PM CDT
Hi Monica,
I still visit Gabbie's site daily even though I don't sign the guestbook often.
I am so saddened with the news of Jacob. I have been checking on him for a while now and thought he was going to beat the beast. I HATE cancer! Why does it take away these beautiful children. I know there is no answer for it, only to have faith. That is however hard to have it at times when you know a child is close to earning their wings.
Thinking of you and your unbearable loss. Wishing you could have your sweet angel back in your arms.
Guess I am a little depressed today. Sorry for that.
God Bless you!
Hugs,
Susan
http://www.caringbridge.com/mn/zacharybern
Susan Bernhardt <desbernhardt@msn.com>
zimmerman, mn - Friday, August 26, 2005 9:41 AM CDT
Hi Monica,
Just found your site from another CB page. It is so beautiful, so inspiring! Your daughter was beautiful, I just can't imagine...
I know it's God's supernatural grace that carries you. I see Jesus all over your life and this page. You are such an awesome testimony of God's faithfulness.
Thanks for sharing your journey of hope, and lifting others up in prayer.
Blesssings to you all,
Susan
Susan & Jordan <Susan2956@yahoo.com>
Covington, LA - Thursday, August 25, 2005 4:28 PM CDT
Could you please put out a message to pray for Jacob Duckworth (caringbridge.org/fl/jacob)?? His parents have just gotten the worst possible news and time is short. He and his family are very precious. Thank you and God bless you!!
laurie wilkey
urbana, il u.s.a. - Thursday, August 25, 2005 2:24 PM CDT
Monica,
No matter that you don't update as often...we still think of Gabbie each day, look at her pictures and relish the memory of her short life. She is and always will be a precious child of God.
Thanks to Yolanda in the previous guestbook entry too...she is a beautiful witness to the love and faithfulness of Jesus! Wow, what faith!
Love,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose, weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Monday, August 22, 2005 3:30 PM CDT
Dearest Monica, alas, I wonder also. An excerpt from my journal written many, many years ago: "Anna was loving, kind, gentle, soft spoken, obedient, polite, joyful and loved the Lord very much. When Anna was eight, she was required, as a school assignment, to make a scrapbook of her hero. Her scrapbook was of Jesus. My daughter was everything in this life to me and, except for our Lord and Saviour Himself, I can love no one more. In utter shock and disbelief, I whispered, "Why? Why?" Never answering my question, our Saviour drew me close, embraced me with His mercy and covered me with His grace. It is Jesus who has lifted me, Jesus who has carried me, Jesus who has sustained me and Jesus has been the Strength for me to go on." Now, over eight years later, more than I would like, I wonder and it is still His mercy, it is still His grace and, of course, it is still Jesus, Jesus, Jesus. They are in Heaven and He draws nigh. . .
In His Love,
Yolanda
http://www.galatians5.com
Mom to Anna <galatians5@truevine.net>
Altamonte Springs, FL USA - Sunday, August 21, 2005 3:18 PM CDT
Monica-
Im so bummed I didn't get to talk to you more. Thank you for sharing in this special day with us! I'm so glad you could make it with little Noah! He is so precious. I would love to get together with you! You have so much wisdom and your heart is so big. Thank you for reaching out to others even though I know your pain is so deep. I know Gabbie's is in heaven with a big smile on her face and so proud of her parents!! Lots of love and prayers to you and your family!!
Rachele and Zach! <rlaco2001@yahoo.com>
Shakopee, mn - Saturday, August 20, 2005 10:39 PM CDT
BRENDA My Loving Dad's Site <brurka@shaw.ca>
EDMONTON,ALBERTA CANADA, - Friday, August 19, 2005 2:22 AM CDT
I am praying Aubrey's bladder problem resolves itself soon. Last summer(August too) my son, who was entering 2nd grade, had similar issues. We also took him to the doctor, only to find there was nothing wrong. Our doctor felt it was due to anxiety and said that was very common in kids his age. I was due to have another baby and school was starting soon, so we think that is what brought it on. I never realized how many kids go through this kind of thing. Just wanted you to know you are not alone and I understand how frustrating it can be. Good luck!
Angie
MN - Tuesday, August 16, 2005 9:48 PM CDT
Monica,
What a signal grace from God and Gabbie! I'm surprised it didn't just say "will you be dere?"!!!!! That's so cool and what a neat connection for other bereaved parents to visit.
Praying for Aubrey and her bladder...poor little girl!
Blessings and love,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose, weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Sunday, August 14, 2005 3:02 PM CDT
Hi Monica,
So great to see you are back and journaling again! Eureka Springs sounds like a beautiful place.
Thank you for being so honest about your grief, and how horrible it really can be at times, even though as you said we are expected to be quiet about it. I admire that; wish it was easier for me to be more open about it. Thank you also for sharing the other children who have died from this disease. I relive my own initial grief as I read their pages and just feel so much for them and wish I could reach out to them and hug them.
Hope you are catching up after being away and that Aubrey is doing better with her bladder issues.
God bless you!
Love, Jen
Jen Buckentine Zachary's Site <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Sunday, August 14, 2005 8:16 AM CDT
Monica,
So glad you're home safe! I giggled about Noah and his fodder...Mary is 10 mos. and already a pacifier-addict. We may have to follow your lead some point soon to break her!
I so agree with the over-seas grieving...how real they are with their sorrowful emotions.
God bless your weekend and hope to talk to you soon!
Love,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose, weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Friday, August 12, 2005 3:23 PM CDT
Hi Monica!
Welcome home from your vacation!
It's funny--I think my Jenny and your Aubrey are very similar souls :o)
Jenny has that frequent urge feeling at times too and after ruling out all the medical possibilities we have finally figured out that, for her, it is anxiety related.
Jenny can be anxious and /or nervous at times , and also occassionally at school, and then she feels like she has to
"go". I heard there are books out there for parents to read about anxiety and children and I think I will get one. :o)
Anyway, that may not be the case with Aubrey but it is with Jenny. And after talking to other parents, it is more common that I thought too.
As always your website is so very touching. You care so deeply about others and that is something that is very beautiful, and often times, too rare in this world.
Love to you,
Sara
www.caringbridge.com/mn/danielhammer <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Thursday, August 11, 2005 0:06 AM CDT
Hi-
Just wanted to let you know I was thinking about you! I love coming to Gabbie's website and reading your passages. I'm glad to see that you guys made it back safely from your trip. We are having a party for Zach on Aug 20th the details are in the view photos, please come if you can!
God Bless!
Rachele and Zach
www.caringbridge.org/mn/zachwest
RACHELE AND ZACH <RLACO2001@YAHOO.COM>
SHAKOPEE, MN - Wednesday, August 10, 2005 9:55 PM CDT
Hi Monica,
We recently got back from a vacation to Colorado and South Dakota and I have to admit, once again, it was not the vacation I anticipated and hoped it would be. We have a 14 and 17 year old and we also did not make the vacation "kid friendly" enough. I think by the end of day 3 they were sick of seeing nature, rocks and mountains. We promised them we'd balance it out better next time. Glad you made it back home safely. We too traveled through KS City to get to Colorado. UGH!!
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, - Wednesday, August 10, 2005 7:22 PM CDT
Hi Monica, Sorry your vacation wasn't what you thought it might be. That is how all of our family vacations went. I think that is normal. It is always so nice to be "home sweet home" again. I can't believe that summer is almost over and the kids are going back to school. Way too soon! Hope you have a "Great" week. Hugs the kids for me.
Much love and many hugs from Ohio, Barb (Mom to Debbie & Heidi)
www.caringbridge.org/oh/debbie
www.caringbridge.org/oh/heidi "Recycle yourself . . . become an organ donor"
Barb <babogner@earthlink.net>
Mansfield, Ohio USA - Wednesday, August 10, 2005 10:15 AM CDT
Hey Monica-
Glad to read the update that all went relatively well. :0) It's always so nice to get back home after a trip. I had to chuckle as I read about Noah. Lincoln is being quite something for me lately and our road trips are only a few miles. lol. I guess my point was that it's always nice to hear what's happening in my own household is happening in someone else's, too. I don't think that's so weird with Aubrey. Mercedes did that for a few days, too. We had gone to a wedding and no kidding, every 5 minutes she had to pee. Obviously not going half of the time and I was getting very frusterated. After a few days, I thought I should bring her in to be checked, and nope, not a thing wrong with her. I asked her about it and why she was doing that and she said, "mom, you said you don't want me to have an accident, right?" Ugh, and she's 3. Glad to hear to hear it got better at home.
Thanks for sharing with us!
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
Gaylord, MN USA - Wednesday, August 10, 2005 9:41 AM CDT
Hi Monica,
I'm so glad you made it out of Kansas City safely. :) I too remember it being tricky at times but I would trade it anyday for the Minneapolis traffic. I'm sure it feels good to be back in your own bed and home safe and sound. May God bless you.
Love, Mary
Mary Akagi <b.akagi@worldnet.att.net>
Maple Grove, MN - Tuesday, August 9, 2005 7:54 AM CDT
Hi Monica!
I'm so happy you had a good trip - meltdowns included!! Traveling with small children is difficult.. we limit our vacation to day trips because we just can't handle the "are we there yet"s and "i have to go potty" every two minutes..... Ron wants to be brave and take the drive to Disney next summer....we'll see! :o)
I, too, would have been sick to my stomach on roads like that. I once went to the mountains and my heart was stopping because of the icy roads that do not have guardrails! I know guardrails wouldn't help much - but to have the peace of mind to know they were there would have been nice!!
My Sarah, too, has been having lots of meltdowns...teething, not knowing how to communicate & not getting things fast enough for her are usually the causes.
It sounds like Noah had a blast with the ostriches & Aubrey with the pool. Tell them not to grow up too fast, ok?
Have a great day!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Jenn Hartley <ronjenn696@prodigy.net>
Bensalem, PA USA - Tuesday, August 9, 2005 7:33 AM CDT
Hi Monica,
Glad you made it back safe and sound! Sounds like a good trip minus the normal stuff that happens with kids. Hope your ride through Kansas City wasn't too bad. I used to live there for a VERY long time and the traffic is nothing like the Twin Cities. Minneapolis is 100 times worse!
Anyway, glad you are back and had a good family vacation.
Take care!
Hugs,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <desbernhardt@msn.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Monday, August 8, 2005 6:27 PM CDT
I miss you. Come back and journal. :) (Hope you had a good vacation.)
Dianne <diannegg@earthlink.net>
Prior Lake, MN - Monday, August 8, 2005 1:17 PM CDT
Hey Monica-
Hope your vacation is going well for you guys! Anxious to hear how it went.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
Gaylord, MN USA - Wednesday, August 3, 2005 3:41 PM CDT
Hey Monica-
Those pics on the home page totally caught me off guard. Wow. It certainly is the most horrendous thing. I will be looking for places to also donate to. It's almost unbelievable; it's just scary. A person feels guilty for the things we have here and then there are children that look like that in other parts of the world. I'm going to show my girls those pics so they know how lucky they are to run to the fridge any time they want something to eat or drink. Thanks for opening my eyes, Monica.
May you guys have a safe and fun trip! I'll be anxious to read how it was. I'll miss your updates!
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
Gaylord, Mn USA - Friday, July 29, 2005 2:43 PM CDT
Hi Monica, we are leaving for vacation on Saturday also but are hitting a NC beach! I do know that Samaritan's Purse (run by Billy Graham's son Franklin) is a good international charity that we support. Their website is www.samaritanspurse.org. Have a safe and happy vacation though as always I know it will be bittersweet. God bless.
Robin Boger <Robin.Boger@rbc.com>
Lewisville, NC - Thursday, July 28, 2005 8:59 AM CDT
I haven't signed in for a while but I want you to know that you are always in my thoughts and prayers. I do have a question...where in the world to you go to "beaches" in land-locked Minnesota??? Come on over to NC for a visit to a REAL beach. I'll show you a good time :) I love you guys and continue to lift you up in prayer!
KhalitaDuke Peds BMT Aplastic Anemia <khalita@yahoo.com>
Lexington, NC - Wednesday, July 27, 2005 8:39 AM CDT
BRENDA My Loving Dad's Site <brurka@shaw.ca>
EDMONTON,ALBERTA CANADA, - Wednesday, July 27, 2005 1:23 AM CDT
Hey Monica-
I love the pic of the girls on the "home page". That is absolutely adorable. :0) While I smile thinking about all of the fun they had in that pic, it breaks my heart at the same time. Thanks so much for sharing her with us. . .
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
Gaylord, MN USA - Monday, July 25, 2005 10:15 AM CDT
Monica,
Thanks for honoring our beloved Theresa...we feel so loved and she is no doubt sending her love in abundance from heaven too.
Stay cool and enjoy your weekend!
Love and God bless,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose, weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Friday, July 22, 2005 4:33 PM CDT
Hey Monica-
Just wanted you to know I was here. Sounds like it's going to be another hot weekend. Yikes! I tend not to get out of the house when it's so hot. :0) Hope you guys have a good weekend.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
Gaylord, MN USA - Friday, July 22, 2005 2:29 PM CDT
Monica, I'm so glad Aubrey made it home safe & sound as I know you really missed her. Take care & God bless!
Robin Boger <Robin.Boger@rbc.com>
Lewisville, NC - Wednesday, July 20, 2005 11:58 AM CDT
Hey Monica-
Just wanted to let you know that I will be having a luminary in memory of Gabbie at the McLeod Co Relay for Life in Hutchinson. She has touched my life in countless ways, so this is the least I could do for her.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
Gaylord, MN USA - Tuesday, July 19, 2005 12:46 AM CDT
Hey Monica-
I bet it was great having Aubrey home now! That is a long time, but I'm sure she had so much fun!
Hopefully today is a little cooler. :0)
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
Gaylord, MN USA - Monday, July 18, 2005 8:07 AM CDT
Monica,
Thank you so much for being with us yesterday...to have another kindred sorrowful momma means so much. I will never forget your original kindness in sending me a note after seeing Theresa's obit. You listened to the Holy Spirit and comforted my heart, despite not knowing me at all. Thank you for opening the door to our friendship in the Lord, via the pathway of our 2 baby girls in heaven, it is one I treasure deeply.
Much love,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose, weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Sunday, July 17, 2005 4:34 PM CDT
Hi Monica,
I love the story about Noah not wanting to go swimming - what a strong-willed boy. Him screaming when he saw you taking out his swim trunks reminded me of our strong-willed Zachary. Although I'm sure Aubrey is having a wonderful time at the lake, I know that you miss her and we are keeping you all in our prayers. Enjoy the heat - looks like it's going to continue!
Love
Jen
Jen Buckentine Zachary's Site <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Wednesday, July 13, 2005 6:28 AM CDT
Hi Monica and John,
Just wanted to say Hello and to let you know that I think
of you guys so much and keep you all in my prayers always.
You are a very special and lovely family and your sweet and beautiful Gabbie is in my heart always.
God Bless,
Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Tuesday, July 12, 2005 11:54 PM CDT
Hi Monica,
I understand your worries about Aubrey being away. Hannah is away at Girl Scout camp up north this week. While it is hard to have her gone, I think it's a great experience for her. She also spent a week with my in-laws at their lake condo and she loved it. It again was very hard but a lot of fun for her. I would imagine its a million times harder when you have lost a child though.
Thinking of you this week!
Hugs,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <desbernhardt@msn.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Monday, July 11, 2005 4:53 PM CDT
Just wanted you to know I still check-in and I am always encouraged with your thoughts and reflections about the Lord!!! I pray this week is filled with perfect peace that passes all understanding as Aubrey is away!!!!!!
Angie Gallegos <joyfulinhope@juno.com (www.caringbridge.org/mi/gabriella)>
Auburn Hills, MI - Monday, July 11, 2005 2:09 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
I will be praying for you this week knowing how difficult it is for you to be separated from Aubrey.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
- Monday, July 11, 2005 12:52 AM CDT
Hey Monica-
I've been out of town for awhile and so I just wanted to let you know I was here. Hope you had a good weekend.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
Gaylord, MN USA - Thursday, July 7, 2005 10:25 AM CDT
Thank you so much for your card. It means a lot that with all you have to do that you took the time to remember me and send a card. I think what you did with the bibles is GREAT! I'll be in touch with other plans to see if we can do something with the rest. I love you and continue to lift you up in prayer. Your friendship is dear to me! Blessings!
Khalita Duke Peds BMT Aplastic Anemia <khalita@yahoo.com>
Lexington, NC - Sunday, July 3, 2005 1:23 PM CDT
Believing and standing on His promises....our hope is in Him alone. Blessings to you always.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
- Thursday, June 30, 2005 9:47 PM CDT
Monica,
"Forever missing from this life", how painful those words are to read, much less to feel them in your heart. Life can be so unfair, yet I am so thankful that we have the promise of salvation in our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. I am sorry you will always miss Gabbie in this life, but am so happy that you know Jesus and will one day be with her again. God bless.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, - Wednesday, June 29, 2005 9:12 PM CDT
Hi Monica,
The kid's and I stopped in to the daycare today to visit everyone. Spencer got to see Aubrey again and play alittle bit with her. He did not want to leave and for that matter neither did my other two. Aubrey is getting so big and so grown up. I do miss seeing her. She has a great personality and a beautiful smile.
We hope to stop in a few more times this summer to visit and Spencer would love to play with her again.
Have a great summer and take care!!
Shannon Hujanen <hujanenfamily@mcleodusa.net>
Blaine, MN USA - Tuesday, June 28, 2005 4:04 PM CDT
Hi Monica,
Its funny how we can't fool our kids for long. I don't know how many times I have fallen asleep and forgotten to give tooth fairy money. I cover that up by saying the tooth fairy must have been extra busy the night before - HA!
I love the picture of Gabbie and Aubrey. So sweet!
My friend, Tammy, is having a balloon release at 5pm on 8/9/05 in honor of a year since her sweet girl, Hanna, passed away. I am trying to pass this on and get it going. So far she has 13 states and 3 countries involved. The website is: www.caringbridge.com/ms/hanna
Take care!!
Hugs,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <desbernhardt@msn.com>
Zimmerman, MN USA - Tuesday, June 28, 2005 10:40 AM CDT
Monica,
It was so much fun to see you all a couple of weeks ago! Thanks again for having us over!!!!
I was giggling reading about Aubrey, she is such a smart girl. Oh well, a good excuse to buy new stamps/markers for the special tooth fairy occasion :).
Wishing Gabbie was with you 3 in person at the wading pool...you'll always be one person short. We miss that little punkin and always feel so awed to be at your home knowing she was in that space at one time and also went to heaven from there.
Love and blessings,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose, weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Monday, June 27, 2005 6:20 PM CDT
Hi Monica,
Just stopping by to say hello and say a prayer for you and your family. Gabbie and Aubrey look so happy in the picture on the web site. I only wish those happy times could have lasted much longer. Thinking of you.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, - Saturday, June 25, 2005 11:47 PM CDT
Hi John, Happy Father's Day! I hope that you day is filled with fun and food. Monica, I always love seeing new pictures of Gabbie. Her little face is just so dear and sweet. Missing Gabbie with you. Have a wonderful week and I enjoy coming to Gabbie's web page so much. Much love and many hugs from Ohio, Barb (Mom to Debbie and Heidi)
www.caringbridge.org/oh/debbie
www.caringbridge.org/oh/heidi "Recycle yourself . . . become an organ donor"
Barb <babogner@earthlink.net>
Mansfield, OHIO USA - Sunday, June 19, 2005 3:16 PM CDT
Happy Fathers Day John,
I hope you have a wonderful day with your family!
Give Monica & the kids a big hug!
Lots of love,
Angel Sheryl
Sheryl Gunzenhauser <mik181@mchsi.com>
Winnebago, Mn - Sunday, June 19, 2005 9:16 AM CDT
Hi Monica,
I truly love the precious picture of sweet little Gabbie and little Aubrey!
I have always felt so much love in my heart for Gabbie,
and it even gets stronger with time.
I also feel so much pain in my heart, for your loss.
Your faith in the Lord, Monica, is beautiful and inspiring.
Please try to turn your cheek at words from those, although well meaning, that cannot understand what seems so clear to the rest of us who support you. I for one, have always been so proud of you and inspired by you..inspired by your deep faith in Jesus, your heartfelt honesty and your strong compassion and love for the innocent suffering children and their families. You should never have to justify, explain or defend your feelings or pain when it comes to this kind of unimaginable loss. I'm very sorry that you are faced with this as well.
Thank you for mentioning Jay. We know them very well and are just so heartbroken for his mom and family.
It is all so difficult.
You and your family are always in our prayers.
God Bless,
Sara
PS Thank you also for the kind email the other day as well.
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN - Thursday, June 16, 2005 11:17 PM CDT
Hi Paquette Family-
Wow how your website has helped me so. Thank you for spreading the word!! I wanted to let you know about a song I heard that I play over and over. Its called Held, by Natalie Grant. The words are very powerful and the message is true. The reason we survive these things is because we are being held. My prayers are with you and your family.
Rachele LaCount www.caringbridge.org/mn/zachwest <rlaco2001@yahoo.com>
Shakopee, mn 55379 - Thursday, June 16, 2005 8:50 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
How senseless and thoughtless people can be when interacting with each other- even well intended believers. We are each on our own path designed for us by God to help us and others in the mission fields we encounter. I daily consider myself blessed to have found you along the way! Sending love, hugs and much empathy
Ivy Ervin *** Missing Lukie*** <the-ervin-family@earthlink.net http://www.caringbridge.org/oh/lukeervin>
Mansfield, Ohio - Thursday, June 16, 2005 8:24 PM CDT
Monica--
You are right. It is not a sin to grieve or feel pain, and unfortunately, some Christians have a habit of piling guilt on other people when they themselves are the ones who don't get it or understand. And the other poor reaction, as you know, is total avoidance so that they don't have to touch anyone bearing pain, whether physical, mental, or emotional. But we are here to bear one another's burdens, to be the face of Jesus to those around us. I am sorry for the rude, insensitive words and behavior that you have to endure sometimes. "Job's comforters" are never an easy lot to deal with, but deal with them we must--in a patient and loving way (that's grating, isn't it ;^D!) even when that primal scream forms in the throat.
"The purposes of a man's heart are deep waters, but a man of understanding draws them out." [Proverbs 20:5]
Would it be that there would be more Christian understanding among us, working in one direction to further God's Kingdom...guess that is called HEAVEN!
Feeling the sharpness of careless words with you and knowing the HOPE and PEACE given by Him alone--
Melody
melody bell
baltimore, MD - Thursday, June 16, 2005 7:37 PM CDT
Add another broken hearted mama to the long list that you already know. My friend Jay died this afternoon at 3:40 after fighting NB for 3 1/2 years. Virginia was with him to the end, watching him let go of the strong fighter that he was even though it was tearing her heart out. My heart aches for her.
Melody
melody bell
baltimore, md - Wednesday, June 15, 2005 5:00 PM CDT
Hi Monica,
I'm happy to read that Aubrey had a good year at Our Lady of Peace. Brady had a pretty good year too; I just love it when he comes home with all kinds of projects related to Christmas (and I don't mean Santa), Easter (not the Easter Bunny), Jesus, etc. That's a great way to look at it, appeasing your guilt for working. I'll have to keep that in mind.
You are so right - God is good and is our rock throughout this painful journey. Thank you for being such a faithful witness.
Is your summer pretty booked up? The boys and I would love to visit.
Love,
Jen
Jen Buckentine Zachary's Site <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Monday, June 13, 2005 5:25 PM CDT
Just thinking about you today - thank you as always for bringing me closer to the Lord!
Missing Gabbie today - as much as everyday ... if I'd only known her ... God Bless you Monica, John, Aubrey and Noah!
Rebekah Clark <mommy_jaden@yahoo.com>
Prior Lake, MN USA - Monday, June 13, 2005 3:12 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
I was so sad too when I found out that Emma Grace was gone. Out of all three, I thought she would beat the beast. It wasn't meant to be and now she is with Stanton and Zoie. I can't imagine the sadness those families are feeling. I feel so horrible for them.
Thinking of you and sweet Gabbie today and all that you have endured.
Hugs!!
God Bless,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <desbernhardt@msn.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Thursday, June 9, 2005 11:07 AM CDT
I came accross your site a couple of weeks ago and have read back through your posts. Your strength, your faith, your family amazes me.
I've live my life carelessly at times. Not thinking, just acting. A part of me feels like I was guided to your site. After reading your heart through your words, I can honestly say I will never again live as though there will be tomorrow to make a change, like there will be tomorrow to make up for todays mistakes. I will NEVER again take my family, my children, my God for granted.
Thanks you so much for sharing your story. I will never forget you.
Jennifer
Nashivlle, tn Us - Wednesday, June 8, 2005 1:32 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
Thinking of you and praying for you today.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, - Monday, June 6, 2005 9:14 AM CDT
Thinking of You!
Andrew....Our Miracle, Our Angel
http://home.comcast.net/~cdmaa/
12/10/96 - 01/09/01
Always Loved ~ Never Forgotten
Newsletter/Support Group
for anyone who have lost a child!
http://home.comcast.net/~alnf1/
Quilt of Memories
http://home.comcast.net/~cdmaa/quilt.htm
Doris (Angel Andrew's Mommy) <cdmaa@comcast.net>
- Sunday, June 5, 2005 8:00 PM CDT
Hello Monica...
The "new" picture is just not fair and not right...I'm sure Gabbie enjoyed her visit with the doggies, BUT, she is too little to be in that hospital room...she should have been home playing with Aubrey or taking a stroller ride...NOT fighting cancer...
I saw a little girl, maybe 3 years old at the movie theater yesterday...bald headed and yellow skinned..She was high in spirits that she was going to the movies - There should be a cure!!!!!!! It's not fair that all these children and people are suffering...
((HUGS)))
Jenn Hartley <ronjenn696@prodigy.net>
Bensalem, PA USA - Saturday, June 4, 2005 7:08 AM CDT
Just letting you know I was here.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
Gaylord, MN USA - Wednesday, June 1, 2005 11:31 AM CDT
Thinking of your family this memorial day. Just realized our angels' heavenly birthdays are close together.
Sending you many hugs, hope and prayer,
Carol and Dale
Riley, Reagan, angel Reid and Reese
Carol Miller (Reid's page) <dmill3@insightbb.com>
Bowling Green, KY - Sunday, May 29, 2005 3:16 PM CDT
Monica,
Wow, I am blown away by the beauty of Yolanda's words...truly she is gifted by the Holy Spirit to write as she does. What a wonderful image of grief/death being a seed and the Lord watering the suffering of it for good. Thank you, both of you, for sharing so opening about Jesus. You are a great inspiration to me through your suffering.
God bless your long weekend, God bless your long days without Gabbie.
Love you,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose, weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Friday, May 27, 2005 4:42 PM CDT
Can you just picture all the children playing in the fields of flowers in Heaven???? Our children, at home forever, waiting for the Great Reunion! A deposit in Heaven, a perfect place like none other!
I Thessalonians 4:13-18
I hearby introduce to you my 3 year old Angel, Trinity
www.trinitysdiary.com
Sincerely,
Elaine, Mother of Angel Trinity
God bless you!
Elaine <angelsmom@shaw.ca>
Surrey, BC Canada - Friday, May 27, 2005 1:54 PM CDT
Hello my friend... I will be praying for Aubrey. Poor baby has had to deal with a great deal, already in her young life. Can you just imagine what goes on in their little minds? I've been thinking of you, and praying for you; it's been a tough week for me also. Andy would have been 15 on the 16th. Sometimes the pain is still so great... love to you all.
jan livingstone (Andy's Mom forever)
- Wednesday, May 25, 2005 8:30 PM CDT
A heartbreaking picture of such a beautiful blue eyed Angel...
((HUGS)))
Jenn Hartley <ronjenn696@prodigy.net>
Bensalem, pa USA - Friday, May 20, 2005 6:24 PM CDT
I too thought of the date in advance, and then missed it. But so many people are thinking of all of you and praying you find some solace
Chris & Gooch
- Friday, May 20, 2005 6:15 AM CDT
Monica-
I'm so sorry that I didn't get a chance to write in here on her "anniversary". Trust me, I thought of you!
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
Gaylord, MN USA - Thursday, May 19, 2005 11:41 AM CDT
She's a beautiful little girl. My prayers are with you.
Ashley Hast (FOA/RA) <ahast24@aol.com>
White Oak, TX - Wednesday, May 18, 2005 11:38 AM CDT
I wish I had great words, but I do not. Your angel is beautiful. Thinking of you and praying for you....
Abby Kinch <abbykinch@hotmail.com>
Lee's Summit, MO - Wednesday, May 18, 2005 9:48 AM CDT
I am praying for all of you, even more so this week. Be good to yourselves.
Love, Mary
Mary Akagi <b.akagi@worldnet.att.net>
Maple Grove, MN - Wednesday, May 18, 2005 6:46 AM CDT
This is the first time I have been to your website, and it has of course brought me to tears. I am thinking of you all today.
Johanna <johannastuart@juno.com>
Flagstaff, AZ USA - Tuesday, May 17, 2005 11:00 PM CDT
I found Gabrielle's web site for the first time today. I have not yet read the entire Journal or guestbook entries but was struck that today was the third anniversary of her being at home with Jesus. My heart goes out to all of you who knew and love her. Her pictures depict an adorable little angel. As I thought of what it must have been like having this angel to hold and love for just two and a half years I remembered a Red Foley record which is over fifty years old....The Song was "Steal Away" based on a spiritual and the narration included the words by the black preacher at little boy's funeral, "Now don't be weepin' for this pretty bit of clay, For the little boy who lived there has done gone and run away...And he's doin' very finely and he 'preciates your love...But his sho nuff Heavenly Father want him in the big house up above...Now He didn't give you that baby for a hundred thousand miles....He just think you needed some sunshine and He lent him for a while... And He let you love and keep him til' your hearts were bigger grown...And those silver tears you're sheddin' are just interest on the loan. So, my poor dejected mourners let your hearts with Jesus rest...And don't go criticizin the one that knows the best...He gave us many comforts, He has the right to take away...To the Lord be praise and glory, now and ever...Let us pray. I could not help but think of the sunshine that your little girl must have brought into your life. May you feel God's love and comfort especially on this day.
Betty Givens <bgarg@charter.net>
Ringgold, GA USA - Tuesday, May 17, 2005 9:55 PM CDT
Hugs and prayers. Gabrielle is such a beautiful little angel.
Lois (FOA/RA)
NJ - Tuesday, May 17, 2005 8:03 PM CDT
Dear Monica, John, Aubrey and Noah,
Thinking of you all even more today, remembering Gabbie and crying with you as you miss her so much here on earth, yet look forward to the hope of Heaven. In His love, Judy and David
Judy Morton
- Tuesday, May 17, 2005 5:36 PM CDT
Thinking of your family
Sending my love to you all~
God Bless!
Lots of Love
Angel Sheryl
mik181@mchsi.com <mik181@mchsi.com>
Winnebago, Mn - Tuesday, May 17, 2005 5:06 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
Thank you for the visit w/Miss Aubrey yesterday, it is always a delight to spend time w/you. Know of our extra prayers today for you and your family. May it be of some small consolation that Gabbie is in no need of our prayers, she's already in perfect bliss with Jesus. Crying with you and sending our love,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <WeLoveTeesa@earthlink.net, www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose>
st. paul, MN United States - Tuesday, May 17, 2005 4:20 PM CDT
Thinking of you all on this very heartbreaking and ever so solemn day ~ God Bless!
Rebekah Clark <mommy_jaden@yahoo.com>
Prior Lake, MN USA - Tuesday, May 17, 2005 2:14 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
It has been awhile since we last spoke, but I think of you and Gabbie everyday. Especially today. Thank you for sharing your journey with all of us...we are much better people because of you and Gabbie.
Love,
Andrea
Andrea Rasmus <rasmusandrea@aol.com>
- Tuesday, May 17, 2005 2:12 PM CDT
John, Monica, Aubrey and Noah,
You are in our hearts and prayers today. I know this day brings back many painful memories for you. Although you know that Gabbie is completely healed and happy, I know it doesn't take away the pain you feel with her absense. Praying for you to feel God's comforting arms around you today. Thinking of you sweet little Gabrielle and looking very much forward to seeing you again someday on the streets of Heaven.
With love,
The Buckentine's
Jen Buckentine Zachary's Site <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Tuesday, May 17, 2005 2:03 PM CDT
Monica, thinking of you all. You have my most heartfelt prayers every day but especially today. May the Lord bless you and keep you, may He make his face shine upon you and give you peace. God bless.
Robin Boger <Robin.Boger@rbc.com>
Lewisville, NC - Tuesday, May 17, 2005 12:06 AM CDT
Monica, John, Aubrey and Noah,
I woke up this morning and immediately thought of the date and remembered this is the day that Gabbie went to live in Heaven. 3 years. It doesn't seem possible. I know that the pain of missing her doesn't go away with time. I am so thankful that you have let God carry you through in your loss and that you look forward to reuniting with Gabbie someday. Love,
Mari Beth Ross <jerryandmaribethross@comcast.net>
Hugo, MN - Tuesday, May 17, 2005 11:05 AM CDT
My thoughts and prayers are with you. May your precious angel visit you in your dreams every night.
Amy ~*~ FoA/RA ~*~ <afulcher@localnet.com>
PA - Tuesday, May 17, 2005 9:48 AM CDT
thinking of you, and sharing in a bit of your sadness today. i am so sorry that any of us have to feel this pain, it is just so, so, wrong. we should never have to see that dash in between dates as it applies to our children. today, it has been six months since i last spoke to my daughter, since she last kissed me and the last full day we would spend together. i abhor this unrelentless pain!!! my olivia also asked me if i would go to heaven with her should she ever go. and i told her yes, i would. you see, a big part of me did go with her that dreadful morning. i am only physically here on this earth for my son noah. i will keep you close in my thoughts today.
angel olivia's mother, wendy www. caringbridge.com/mi/oliviasgrace <wethomps@aol.com>
shelby, mi - Tuesday, May 17, 2005 9:32 AM CDT
Thinking of you today.
Mandy(FOA/RA)
Amanda Bauer <mommytooryan@hotmail.com>
Hastings, NE USA - Tuesday, May 17, 2005 9:29 AM CDT
I could not let today go by without making sure that you know that we all remember the little blonde haired saint and all that she went through. I think the picture on the website is my all time favorite. How innocent. Thinking of you standing on the steps waiting for her to come home still brings tears to my eyes. May God's love and Gabrielle's presence be with you today especially.
Rhonda Meyer <rschultz@scl.doc.state.mn.us>
- Tuesday, May 17, 2005 9:05 AM CDT
Dearest Monica, you, John and the children are ever in our prayers but you and John so very especially this morning. I must honestly tell you I was so distraught I cannot remember everything I told the Lord this morning but I do know I poured out my heart, dear friend. I believe He understands our sobs and tears and gives them a special place in Heaven. Until we can receive them again from His Hand converted into laughter and song, let us delight in the precious and blessed hope He brings us. I love you.
Yolanda
http://www.galatians5.com
Mom to Anna <galatians5@truevine.net>
Altamonte Springs, FL USA - Tuesday, May 17, 2005 9:02 AM CDT
John, Monica, Aubrey, and Noah- Holding you all close in our thoughts and prayers everyday, but even more so today. We miss you so much Gabbie. Love Tom, Kari, Joe, Elli, and Nick Totall
Tom Totall <tkjentotall@aol.com>
Eden Prairie, MN US - Tuesday, May 17, 2005 8:42 AM CDT
Hi there. I was lead to your site by your friend Susan. I am so sorry for your loss. Gabrielle is a beautiful little girl. I'll be keeping you in my prayers.
Michele <mshelez@msn.com>
New Jersey, USA - Tuesday, May 17, 2005 8:11 AM CDT
Dear Monica,
Wish that I were close enough to give you a hug today and listen to memories of sweet Gabbie. Please know how much I think of you. I hope to give you a phone call soon.
Love, Kathy
Kathy Welch <abbysmamaa@yahoo.com>
Lexington, Ohio - Tuesday, May 17, 2005 8:07 AM CDT
My dearest Monica,
What can I say to offer you any comfort on this 3rd anniversary of Gabbie going to heaven?? I don't think there is anything.
Only know that I am constantly inspired by your faith and your love for your children. Gabbie started me on this journey I am on to end suffering for children with any type of cancer. I can say Steve, Gabbie and Baby Allie along with many others are still my inspiration.
I absolutely hate the pain you suffer constantly without Gabbie here. I hope just the knowledge that so many people out here care about you helps a little somehow.
I am dedicating Zachary's page to Gabbie today.
HUGE Hugs to you,
Susan
http://www.caringbridge.com/mn/zacharybern
Susan Bernhardt <desbernhardt@msn.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Tuesday, May 17, 2005 7:52 AM CDT
Remembering . . . especially today . . . a precious little girl who changed my life. Today . . .especially today thinking of a precious family forced to live without her. Thank you for sharing your lives with complete strangers like me and for continuing to bring people closer to God.
Sue Kirtz <skirtz@lmnc.org>
Apple Valley, MN - Tuesday, May 17, 2005 7:45 AM CDT
Love
Sue
xxxxxxx
www.postpals.co.uk
Sue <orangejammies@hotmail.co.uk>
Colchester, Essex, England - Tuesday, May 17, 2005 7:41 AM CDT
Monica & family-
I am thinking of you and remembering your little Gabrielle.
My heart is with you.
Jackson's mom, Michelle
Clear Lake, WI - Tuesday, May 17, 2005 7:25 AM CDT
Dear Paquette's,
I'm really at a loss for words...What can be said to bring you comfort? Please know that I'm thinking about you and your Gabbie today..on her 3rd Angel Anniversary..
I will be lighting a purple candle in Her Honor.
((HUGS)) to you!
Jenn Hartley <ronjenn696@prodigy.net>
Bensalem, pa USA - Tuesday, May 17, 2005 7:19 AM CDT
Dear John, Monica, Aubrey and Noah,
We are remembering Gabrielle today and are thinking of you as you grieve for the time you have missed out on with her. She is truly a special little girl who has made a big impact on so many people.
Love, Mike, Janine and Laura
J. Nielsen
Minineapolis, MN USA - Tuesday, May 17, 2005 7:12 AM CDT
I hope I can get by here tomorrow to offer you some words of encouragement, but in case I do not, please know that you are loved and continually thought of and prayed for. I'll be saying extra prayers for you guys tomorrow. My heart aches for you and I know that can not even begin to compare with what you go through. Know that I care. Blessings in Christ.
Khalita Duke Peds BMT Aplastic Anemia <khalita@yahoo.com>
Lexington, NC - Monday, May 16, 2005 10:04 PM CDT
I will be thinking of and saying a prayer for you all tomorrow. I'm sorry to say that I rarely sign the guestbook, but please know that I am one of so many who stop by very often for a bit of your inspiration, wisdom and compassion.
Patty, mom to Saint Jonathan
- Monday, May 16, 2005 9:47 PM CDT
I wanted to stop by and let you know that my thoughts and prayers continue to be with you. They will especially be with you tomorrow on a very somber day. I truly hope that you and Aubrey have a good day together.
I wanted to let you know that Gabbie's story has touched my life in a very special way. I will never forget her even though I never had the pleasure of meeting her.
Monica - it was wonderful to have coffee with you. I hope we can do that again, when there is no pressure of time.
Jennifer Miles www.caringbridge.org/mn/deemartinson <jennifer.miles@thomson.com>
Minneapolis, MN USA - Monday, May 16, 2005 3:17 PM CDT
Monica, John, Aubrey and Noah,
Just wanted to let you know I'm thinking of you and remembering this anniversary.
Mary Kay Knox <DMK542@juno.com>
Brooklyn Park, MN 55443 - Monday, May 16, 2005 2:05 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
I hope you and Aubrey are having a nice time today. I don't think I have mentioned that the picture of Gabbie at the top of the site is just darling! How you must miss her!! I am keeping you really close to my heart, and John too, as tomorrow is sure to be an extremely difficult day. I am praying for all of you to feel the peace of knowing that she is in the presence of the Lord. I am so sorry that she is not here on earth for you to hold in your arms. It is amazing to me that someone I never even knew of, until after she had went to be with the Lord, has touched me so deeply.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, - Monday, May 16, 2005 1:49 PM CDT
Just wanted to stop out and visit your webpage for Gabrielle and let you know that I am thinking of your family and remembering Gabrielle this so very hard week. Wishing you a peaceful week, filled with wonderful memories of Gabrielle's life. Will be keeping your family in my prayers this week, as always.
God bless, Laura
Heavenly Lights Childrens Memorial
Http://www.heavenlylights.homestead.com
Laura / Heavenly Lights Childrens Memorial <heavenlylights@charter.net>
- Sunday, May 15, 2005 10:12 PM CDT
Hey Monica-
My heart just aches for the families of the 2 little girls. I can't even imagine. What strength and bravery for the best friend to refuse to leave after that monster allegedly told her to leave. The story is just horrendous. This man will have his day. . .
Monica- just know that I'm praying for you as another year has passed.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
Gaylord, Mn USA - Thursday, May 12, 2005 9:30 AM CDT
Hi Monica!
What you said is so true - if you can't trust your own family - WHO can you trust? We always teach our children "Don't Talk To Strangers" because they can hurt you ... but that's only about 20% of the time. The other 80% of the time it's family and friends that hurt people. It's too sad...What is wrong with people??
The pool picture of Gabbie is just too cute - those beautiful eyes! And those chunky arms.... just precious.
Thank You for all your guidance over the months and helping me understand God better... I know everything happens for a reason - that it IS part of a bigger plan.. a plan that we won't know until the end. Thank You for everything, it means more than you'll know.
Enjoy your day off with Aubrey - our time with our children is precious and with hectic lives the time can fly by way too fast... It seems as if it's always Wednesday...and before I know it - it's Wednesday again!
Thinking of you and your family Always!
Jenn Hartley <ronjenn696@prodigy.net>
Bensalem, PA USA - Thursday, May 12, 2005 9:25 AM CDT
Monica,
I so wish that God had not answered your prayers for Gabbie with a no. Of course, that wish is for you...not for Gabbie. We know He listens to our prayers, but even though we say we accept whatever He declares, it is still so very difficult to accept the death of a child. I am praying for you a lot during this especially difficult time. Praying that the anxiety, stress and hectic work schedule will be eased and lightened by a peace that only God can give. As for your comment that you need to pray more....don't we all?!!
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, - Thursday, May 12, 2005 0:51 AM CDT
Hey Monica-
Just letting you know I was here. . .
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
Gaylord, MN USA - Tuesday, May 10, 2005 4:02 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
Thinking of you--always.
Love,
Andrea
www.caringbridge.org/nj/matthew
Andrea Passarella <andrea@passarella.com>
NJ - Monday, May 9, 2005 5:44 AM CDT
As I walked around the Mall of America this morning with many survivors and with many in grief, Gabbie was with me. Thank you for giving life to her.
With Love, Mary
Mary Akagi <b.akagi@worldnet.att.net>
Maple Grove, MN - Sunday, May 8, 2005 5:30 PM CDT
Thinking of you today...
Michelle E.
- Sunday, May 8, 2005 12:41 AM CDT
Monica,
Wishing you a very Happy Mothers Day !!
And a day filled with precious memories of Gabbie!
Lots of Love to you!
Sheryl Gunzenhauser <mik181@mchsi.com>
Winnebago, MN - Sunday, May 8, 2005 7:19 AM CDT
Dear Monica,
As I celebrate a very special Mother's Day tomorrow as Tom is baptized, I want you to know that I will be very much aware of the emptiness you feel celebrating the day without your precious Gabbie. I hope you can enjoy the day with Aubrey and Noah ( and of course John too) even though I am sure it is still very painful. I am thinking of you and lifting you up in prayer.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, - Saturday, May 7, 2005 4:54 PM CDT
Hoping you have a Happy Mothers Day, somehow, Monica.
Chris & Gooch
- Friday, May 6, 2005 11:14 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
It's ironic how in one of your posts this week you speak of anniversaries.
The Scott's just went through the anniversary of Allie's diagnosis. I am constantly amazed at their ability to cope and continue. I know it is painful for them as well but they have an awful lot of strength.
http://www.scotthousehold.com/p3.htm
Hugs,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Friday, May 6, 2005 9:28 PM CDT
Dearest Monica,
Thank you for the sweet entry you left in Zachary's guestbook.
I pray for you to have a peaceful Mother's Day even though I know you will be missing Gabbie horribly.
I pray for my other friends without their children, Becky Bratulich and Jenny Scott. As they have lost their only children, this will be excrutiating. I can say one wonderful thing though, Jenny is expecting a brother for Allie in November.
Hugs to you! Enjoy this lovely weather!
Love,
Susan
http://www.caringbridge.com/mn/zacharybern
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Friday, May 6, 2005 2:10 PM CDT
Oh, Monica-
When I saw the pic of Gabbie, my heart just melted. What a precious little thing! :0)
Then I read your entry and my heart just sunk. I can't imagine. How absolutely horrid. . . at least he is with the Father now.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
Gaylord, MN USA - Friday, May 6, 2005 11:46 AM CDT
Hi Monica,
Oh..there is so much sadness and devestation. It is unbearable. We all need to continue to pray for help.
I continue to pray for you and John, Monica, for your unbearable loss. It is all so hard to understand. We all just have to continue to look to the Lord.
How I wish there was not so much sadness and pain.
My heartfelt prayers and support to you always,
Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Thursday, May 5, 2005 10:15 PM CDT
Praying for you during these unbearable days. I am so sorry for the magnification of grief and pain at this time.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, - Thursday, May 5, 2005 10:11 PM CDT
Monica -
How beautiful Saint Gabbie is, how wise her little eyes look. I often visit your site but I don't believe I've ever signed in. Please pray for little Sydnie Her family has been through so much, and although Sydnie is slowly on the mend, she is still in need of prayers.
Karen, mother to brave diabetes kids Haedn and Jaelyn <khackins@netscape.net>
Red Lion, PA USA - Thursday, April 28, 2005 8:34 PM CDT
Monica,
Please pray for Rachel...her site is:
www.caringbridge.org/mn/rachelhansen
When will there be a cure for children's cancer??????? Please, Jesus soon!
Love,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose, weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Wednesday, April 27, 2005 11:31 AM CDT
Dear Monica,
Thinking of you today and Alexia's family as she earned her wings this morning. Those damn tumors grow so fast! I pray for a cure in our lifetime so that my grandchildren don't even know what cancer is!
Hugs to you,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Wednesday, April 27, 2005 7:11 AM CDT
Monica,
Thinking of you all. The story about Noah's "behaving" just made me laugh...I loved his sweet curls. I like the new picture of precious Gabbie as well but think that sleepy Gabrielle is one of my favorite. Take care & God bless.
Robin Boger <Robin.Boger@rbc.com>
Lewisville, NC - Monday, April 25, 2005 8:23 PM CDT
I am soooooo looking forward to that day... when I meet your Gabbie in Heaven!
jan livingstone (andy's mom forever)
- Monday, April 25, 2005 7:55 PM CDT
Monica,
I continued to be horrified by the culture of death, especially this latest story of baby Charlotte. The parents must be just beside themselves, I can only insert Theresa or Gabbie into that same picture and how crazy we would be going. God bless those dear parents and God bless those who are trying to control their actions.
Blessings and love to you,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose, weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Monday, April 25, 2005 4:45 PM CDT
Monica,
I have had hives and I can sympathize with Noah, and now Aubrey has them too!! Hives are NOT contagious. I believe they can be inherited, because my mother also has had severe hives. Mine have not been severe. My mom always has medicine on hand to help her when she gets them. Hers are mostly allergic reactions to different foods and that is also what my hives are from. My son, Jim, has also had hives but his were from fabric softener sheets. Don't know if you use them or not, but his Dr. said that is the most common cause of hives in young children. If you use them you may want to switch to liquid fabric softener and see if that helps. I'll email you soon. I have some news that I want to share with my dear Christian friend, just haven't had the time yet.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, - Friday, April 22, 2005 8:19 PM CDT
Hey Monica-
What an adorable pic of her. She truly was a gift.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
Gaylord, MN USA - Friday, April 22, 2005 12:48 AM CDT
Dear Monica,
Thinking of you today.
Hugs,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Friday, April 22, 2005 11:10 AM CDT
Dear Monica,
The picture of Gabbie is cute!! When I saw it I smiled then a wave of sadness came over me. I can't believe I'm looking at a beautiful baby who is not here physically anymore. I have so many pictures of my kids like Gabbie's.. She is such a beautiful baby!
Would John like to be a stay-at-home Dad? It's becoming quite common now-a-days! You'll have to rent the movie "Daddy Daycare"! It's funny!
I hope you have a wonderful weekend! I'm glad Noah's doing better!!
Jenn Hartley <ronjenn696@prodigy.net>
Bensalem, PA USA - Friday, April 22, 2005 6:46 AM CDT
Dear Monica,
Thank you for reaching out to us and thank you VERY MUCH for reminding us how very very thankful we are to be for our undeserved salvation!!! I am taking that to heart... Bless you
Love, Ivy and family ***Forever missing Lukie*** <the-ervin-family@earthlink.net http://www.caringbridge.org/oh/lukeervin>
Mansfield, Ohio - Thursday, April 21, 2005 7:47 PM CDT
Monica,
The Mahaney quote is a keeper! When I find treasurers like that on CaringBridge I always print them out and put them in my bible. Thank you for sharing it. Have a blessed day.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, - Thursday, April 21, 2005 9:05 AM CDT
Hello my friend... I've been pretty consumed by babies lately, sorry I've been absent. I'm also sorry to hear that you too are having some bad days. Yesterday was the 10th anniversary of Andy's leukemia diagnoses; a lot of bad memories and heart ache. It just doesn't get much easier, does it? Sending my love and prayers your way. God bless
jan livingstone (andy's mom forever)
- Wednesday, April 20, 2005 6:51 PM CDT
Monica,
I will be praying for Noah and John's peace of mind. I'll write more later....in a hurry.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, - Wednesday, April 20, 2005 4:01 PM CDT
Hey Monica-
Hopefully Noah is doing better today.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
Gaylord, MN USA - Wednesday, April 20, 2005 8:42 AM CDT
Monica,
I can relate so much to your situation. Brady has not like going to daycare for some time. He's thrilled now that I'm home and he can come home after school. It won't be easy to get him to go back to daycare when I have to return to work. It is so tough, especially being the one who carries the insurance. It is hard to see our kids in someone else's care for the majority of their waking hours. I will pray for your situation, as I pray for ours.
Love,
Jen
Jen Buckentine Zachary's Site <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Tuesday, April 19, 2005 1:40 PM CDT
I'm sure that you will make the right decision for your family. I went through a similar situation some months ago and was feeling very frustrated. What I discovered was that I was approaching our situation with a somewhat closed mind and not really considering all of our viable options.
Some employers (mine included) offer benefits for reduced appointments -- I was able to carry full benefits while working 75%-time. Also, the number of stay-at-home dads is increasing. My girls are currently in a home daycare that is operated by a stay-at-home dad. He started out being unemployed due to a non-compete agreement and found that he enjoyed being home with his three children. And, after several months, he became a licensed child care provider to help supplement the family income.
I truly sympathize with your situation, and I wish you all the best with whatever you decide. Good luck and prayers are with you.
Mary Stein <stein094@umn.edu>
IGH, MN - Tuesday, April 19, 2005 8:58 AM CDT
My mom always used to tell me that if I have faith and believe that things will work out.
Trev also wants for us to pick him up right after school. He doesn't want to stay at extend day any longer.
Jennifer Miles www.caringbridge.org/mn/deemartinson <jennifer.miles@thomson.com>
Minneapolis, MN USA - Tuesday, April 19, 2005 8:48 AM CDT
Hey Monica-
Hope you guys had an "ok" weekend.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
Gaylord, MN USA - Monday, April 18, 2005 8:58 AM CDT
Monica,
Praying for you and the cross of living w/o Gabbie today. The tough thing about this cross is it never gets tired, each day it awaits us to go back on our shoulders and heart again. Praying that God sends you an extra shot of grace as you approach the month of May.
Love,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose, weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Friday, April 15, 2005 2:28 PM CDT
Hey Monica-
You can disregard the email I sent to you because as I was home for lunch, it came to me that I was forgetting the dot before prayers. I was trying every combination this morning and then the "dot" just came to me.
Anyway, stains will happen and I'm sure Sarah understands. Since she got the "first" stain, the next ones won't hurt as bad. :0)
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
Gaylord, MN USA - Thursday, April 14, 2005 12:55 AM CDT
Monica,
The Mohler excerpt from yesterday was very informing. I will steer Bob to the site. I think there is a lot he can use in his Sr. High Sunday School class. Thanks for sharing it on Gabbie's site. It is difficult to build the church in our secular world today. I believe there is probably more sin than ever, but the attraction to coming to church falls short for so many. I am in a church that is struggling with traditional vs contemporary services and in many ways it divides the church. That is just the people that are already there, much less trying to attract visitors. Many churches are struggling to attract people, but we have found that the ones that teach and preach strong Biblical principles and have a solid Biblical doctrine are growing, at least in our area. It is definitely something to be praying about. Blessings to you and your family.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, - Tuesday, April 12, 2005 6:23 PM CDT
Monica,
Wow- what an excerpt! I have yet to go to the site, but I will! I took the liberty of copying/sending it to people in my email book to spread the awareness. I have known that there are more Christians in Africa than there are in America for several years.... We must remember that the "mission field" is right outside our door!! Thank you for being one of God's lights...
Love, Ivy Ervin <the-ervin-family@earthlink.net>
Mansfield, OH - Monday, April 11, 2005 8:00 PM CDT
Dearest Monica,
Please say prayers for Baby Alex's family today. He passed this morning at not quite the age of 6 months.
http://www.caringbridge.org/mn/alexbauer/index.htm
Thinking of you and Gabbie today.
Hugs!
God Bless,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Friday, April 8, 2005 10:40 AM CDT
Hi Monica,
Hope you and Aubrey had fun yesterday!
I believe that some people just look to be negative about things. You are a very compassionate person. Don't worry about what other people say. You have been through (in my opinion) the worst thing that a mother can suffer, PERIOD!
Take care!
Hugs!
Susan
www.caringbridge.com/mn/zacharybern
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Thursday, April 7, 2005 2:48 PM CDT
Hey Monica-
That picture is something. . . wow, I don't know what to say. The children are just so vulnerable and don't even understand what's happening to them.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
GAYLORD, MN USA - Wednesday, April 6, 2005 1:53 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
Your heart is so full of love and compassion for others.
I have witnessed that so many times. You have always been so helpful and caring to others.
And of course you see Gabbie in other suffering souls. That makes perfect sense to me. We are all children of God, and the innocence of the suffering is unmistakable and so very heart wrenching. You are so special and selfless and how I wish there were more people like you, Monica.
I'm sorry but I just had to say that.
Thank you for your continued journeling.
You reach out to many people in many ways.
Love,
Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Tuesday, April 5, 2005 11:05 PM CDT
Beloved Sister, no, absolutely nothing wrong with seeing Gabrielle's suffering in another child and your own in their mother. Actually, in God's economy it is very right. This is called compassion. In here lies the love Jesus so often spoke about. This is how we carry each other's burdens and so fulfil the law of Christ. It rejoices my heart that you are so filled with His loving kindness! I have said it before and I'll say it again. Visiting Gabrielle's Prayers always draws me closer to God. As far as all these injustices are concerned, I am reminded of Psalm 37 - "Fret not thyself because of evildoers . . ."
Yolanda <galatians5@truevine.net>
Altamonte Springs, FL USA - Tuesday, April 5, 2005 8:01 PM CDT
Hi Monica,
The picture of little Mihad brings so much saddness to my heart. And speaking of hearts, I know that you have a very big heart for those who suffer. And I thank you for all of your loving support and prayers over the past couple years. We would love to get together with you once tax season if over! Just let us know when.
Love,
Jen
Jen Buckentine Zachary's Site <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Tuesday, April 5, 2005 10:32 AM CDT
Hi Monica!
Please don't feel this way! I'm sorry people can be insensitive. If those people would walk in your footsteps or view a few of these caringbridge pages they may understand why you say what you say and why you do the things you do. YOU have lost a child.. the worst thing that could happen to someone...and for someone to make you feel as if you have to justify yourself is W-R-O-N-G. There's nothing wrong in comparing Gabbie with Mihjad..they have both suffered.
I pray that I never have to go through what you went through and I completely sympathize with you.
You and your family are in my heart today.. and everyday!
Jenn Hartley <ronjenn696@prodigy.net>
Bensalem, PA USA - Tuesday, April 5, 2005 7:19 AM CDT
Monica,
First, let me say that I am so sorry that you have been unjustly accused and criticized. I believe the criticism is because those people do not understand to what degree you watched your child suffer. They cannot even begin to comprehend watching their child suffer as you saw Gabbie suffer. Therefore, they view your deep sorrow as being one-sided and all encompassing about "you and your" grief. They don't realize that you weep for others and have a broken heart not only for Gabbie and what she endured, but because you do not ever want any child to have to go through what your precious child endured. I have no doubt that your tremendous sorrow and grief includes all children that have to endure such suffering. I can only imagine in my heart and mind from what you have written and shared on this site how deep the suffering of your child tore at your innermost being. People that have never been where you have been may be quick to judge and accuse or criticize out of ignorance. To put it bluntly, they just don't get it! That does not excuse their criticism, but possibly makes it easier to understand. I too miss all of the links to other sites on CaringBridge. What a shame that a few can ruin something so wonderful for so many. Hopefully, CaringBridge will find a way to have a page for others to reference off of and steer people to other sites. Have a good week and God bless.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, - Monday, April 4, 2005 10:59 PM CDT
Absolutely NOTHING is wrong with that. As a person who has seen much suffering...and experienced much, both personally and with loved ones, it makes you MORE compassionate because you know some of the same feelings people are experiencing. Anyone who has suffered can relate. Those who have not suffered so much may see this differently. You have done nothing wrong here. You have been on my heart a lot today and I wanted to let you know. Blessings and love to you in Christ.
Khalita Duke Peds BMT - Aplastic Anemia <khalita@hecaresonline.org>
Lexington, NC - Monday, April 4, 2005 10:04 PM CDT
Hey Monica-
I bet you guys took one of your famous stroller rides yesterday. :0) It was absolutely beautiful! Today it's a little windy, but hey, I'll take it! We were outside all day yesterday and I'm assuming we'll be out again after work today. Hope you enjoy the day.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
GAYLORD, MN USA - Monday, April 4, 2005 3:49 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
Thinking of you and your family. Hope you have a nice weekend.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, - Friday, April 1, 2005 3:12 PM CST
Hey Monica-
Hope you have a good weekend.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
GAYLORD, MN USA - Friday, April 1, 2005 1:39 PM CST
I haven't written anything in a while but I do still check in at least three times a week. I want to know how you are doing and it is a constant reminder to me about what is really important in life. This whole thing with Terri S. is almost too terrible to think about. I could see if she were terminally ill or not breathing on her own. I know her husband said this was her wish but I have to wonder was it a comment many of us have maybe made while watching a movie, "I would never want to live like that." How many 25 year olds have really given that the kind of thought it really needs? It's a wake up call to the world. I feel horrible for her parents knowing that she could have lived and what she must have gone through in the end. I can't imagine the anger they are feeling right now and can only hope they have the faith to not let it destroy them. Prayers for the Pope...may God's will be done, afterall this is what he has lived his entire life looking forward to, eternal life. I am once again a Partner in Hope. I can't do much to help kids with cancer but I can give to help aid in the find for a cure. Have a great weekend.
Rhonda Meyer <rschultz@scl.doc.state.mn.us>
- Friday, April 1, 2005 9:14 AM CST
Dear Monica,
I am very sorry for your loss.
If God does not will this to happen, then why does he allow it to happen? I wish I understood.
A Friend <afriend@earthlink.com>
Orlando, FL - Wednesday, March 30, 2005 10:22 PM CST
Dear Monica, No it certainly isn't God's desire for our innocents to succumb to disease & ruthlessness... I am forever grateful though that God DOES work GOOD out of our tragedies. I know my life is so much more blessed knowing you. Praise Him for connecting us through our grief!
Yipee for Noah's great check=up!! I had Dane in to the dr as well Tuesday for his 18mo well baby. Passed with flying colors- whew!! Your shower/bath story brought a big smile to my face tonight. Joscelyn and Dane also could spend the day in the tub but we try to limit their baths to only 2-3 a week. Yes they do get showers inbetween!~ LOL>... Just wanted to let you know we are keeping you all in our prayers. Hugs x.x.x.
Monte and Ivy ERvin *** forever missing LUkie*** <the-ervin-family@earthlink.net http://www.caringbridge.org/oh/lukeervin>
Mansfield, OHi 44906 - Wednesday, March 30, 2005 7:47 PM CST
Thinking of your prescious Gabrielle as well as all the other children who are and have suffered ... the K102 St. Jude's Radiothon is on this morning in the Twin Cities and like every year my heart aches and my tears flow from the stories told ... if only there was a way to end all this suffering ... I thank Gabbie everyday for helping me find my way ... thank you Monica and John for sharing Gabby's story ... maybe one day this suffering will end - until then I will continue to spread God's Word and hope people look to him and confess their sins ... for all of mankind ... God Bless YOU and as always THANK YOU!
Love ~ Rebekah
Rebekah Clark <mommy_jaden@yahoo.com>
Prior Lake, MN USA - Wednesday, March 30, 2005 11:05 AM CST
Hey Monica-
Just letting you know I was here.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
GAYLORD, MN USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 11:08 AM CST
Monica,
Thank you for sharing the link to Kelly's painting. It is very impressive and very moving. We too pray that people had a meaningful Easter beyond the Easter Bunny. Brady has such a hard time understanding how people can celebrate Easter if they are not Christian. He says "it's just not right mom." If he understands this at age 7, why is it so hard for others to get? As always, thank you for sharing the Lord with us all.
Love,
Jen
Jen Buckentine Zachary's Site <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 11:04 AM CST
Happy Easter. I feel badly about not keeping up with you very well, but you are constantly in my thoughts and prayers and I hope to be able to keep in touch a little better when my life slows down a little bit. School, work and health is keeping me really busy. Take care and know that I love you very much and cherish your friendship. Blessings in Christ.
Khalita Duke Peds BMT - Aplastic Anemia <khalita@hecaresonline.org>
Lexington, NC - Sunday, March 27, 2005 10:04 PM CST
How nice of you to remember all the other children, and their aching families. I have to say, the picture of Noah and Aubrey where he is crying reminds me of a baby picture of my husband and his younger brother. Ronnie is 4 and smiling like a fiend and his 3 yr old brother looks kind of wide eyed and scared, like he is about to scream and cry, and then you look down and see my husbands hand pinching the heck out of his brother's thigh!
Chris - Gooch's mom
- Saturday, March 26, 2005 11:32 PM CST
Monica and John,
It brought tears to my eyes to see Zachary and Gabrielle and all the other names you have listed on Gabbie's site. They are certainly tears of saddness that all these litte souls left our arms too soon, but also tears of joy that they are with the Risen Lord. We too are so very thankful that God sent His only begotten Son to pay the ultimate price so that we may live. Blessings to your family this Easter.
Love,
The Buckentine's
Jen Buckentine Zachary's Site <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Saturday, March 26, 2005 3:32 PM CST
HAPPY EASTER LOVE WWW.POSTPALS.CO.UK
Post Pals <info@postpals.co.uk>
- Thursday, March 24, 2005 3:39 AM CST
LOVE
Edmonton,Alberta Canada, - Wednesday, March 23, 2005 1:21 PM CST
Dear Monica,
I love the picture of you and John with Aubrey and Gabbie. It brings back to memory Gabbie's big, beautiful eyes.
Love, Janine
J. Nielsen
Minneapolis, MN USA - Wednesday, March 23, 2005 12:17 AM CST
Preach it Sister!!
Dianne <diannegg@earthlink.net>
Prior Lake, MN - Wednesday, March 23, 2005 11:18 AM CST
You are so right about our culture! It sickens me to think of how so many have been brainwashed in their atitudes towards abortion and euthanasia and then to think of the dark path it puts our country on. This morning I was talking to my advisory about the same thing, emphasizing how decisions concerning life should never be made for convenience sake but rather for respect for God's creation. We can never know how God is glorified in mangled lives, but he is glorified in all of life. I remember a friend of mine who is a nurse once commenting on a severely retarded patient she was serving at the time...her heart was touched deeply when she entered the hospital room one day to hear a very poor rendition of the children's song "Jesus Loves Me" coming quietly from the lips (and heart) of this "throw away" patient...she told me that it was some of the sweetest music she had ever experienced. Life is precious...God gives us life...we have no right to take it away.
Melody
baltimore, md - Tuesday, March 22, 2005 10:06 PM CST
hi monica! it's alison from CA. i'm on break at lunch right now. that picture of noah and your veil is so cute! mom and dad just told me that dan & karen & the boys are coming out next week. hopefully they'll have better weather than tom and carey! maybe will see you all soon, too? i hope so! tell everyone i send my love!
YiCf (Yours in Christ forever),
alison
Alison Burch <americandreamer7@earthlink.net>
Huntington Beach, Ca USA - Tuesday, March 22, 2005 2:44 PM CST
Hi Monica!
Thank you for your prayers. Last night was very difficult but I made it through. I will be going today, too, for the final goodbye.
What a "pretty" picture of Noah! :o) Alex is goofy sometimes and will put on a "pretty" hat, but that's as far as it goes, no matter how hard Em holds him down and tries to dress him "pretty"! You have beautiful children!
I didn't see the poster, can you please put it up again? Have a great day!!
Jenn Hartley <ronjenn696@prodigy.net>
Bensalem, PA USA - Tuesday, March 22, 2005 6:18 AM CST
Yes, I think it is very sad that CaringBridge feels a need to enforce this. I have found so many wonderful families by linking from other's sites. They must have a reason for this change, and more than likely it has to do with "privacy" laws or something of that nature. I don't know if you ever visit Katia Solomon's site, but her mother set up a separate link from CaringBridge of Katia's friends, that way we are still able to access people and keep up and pray for them.
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, - Saturday, March 19, 2005 7:01 PM CST
Dear Monica,
I will pray for your friend. The picture of Lexy has touched my heart so much ever since the first day that I saw it. Yes, it makes me sad, but there is something about it that is so indescribable, it is beyond beautiful in my eyes. Thinking of you and praying for you today.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, - Friday, March 18, 2005 9:11 AM CST
Hi Monica,
I will be saying prayers for your friend. I am sorry they are going through such a tough time. I appreciate your note in my friends guestbook. That was very thoughtful of you.
People don't always know what to say or do but why can't they just say that?! I think it would ease things a bit and just say, "I care, let me know what would help." I often say that I don't have any words that would probably help but I'm here for them whenever they need me. I'm sorry just doesn't seem sufficient at times but it's also better than pretending nothing happened.
I have never forgotten about Gabbie one day since I found out that she was sick and I never will. She has touched my heart and you have too.
Hugs,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <desbernhardt@msn.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Wednesday, March 16, 2005 9:34 PM CST
I will definitely be praying for your friend. Sometimes we don't know why it all piles up on one person, just getting hit with one thing after another. It reminds me of Job...the blessing will come, God will be honored, but oh the pointing fingers and pain while it is happening! I am so glad that she has a friend like you to lift her up and give her encouragement instead of pressing her down even further like one of Job's "comforters" (too many of those in the world that make the trials even harder). And you are able to do that because of the trials you have endured (still endure!) mostly related to Gabbie's death. It is amazing that in so much gloom, blessing can arise...praise His Name forever! And Miss Gabbie is doing just that (praise!) while holding the precious pierced hand of Her Savior. For that we CAN rejoice.
Prayers for all your family and the healing of grievous words and behavior...
melody bell
baltimore, md - Wednesday, March 16, 2005 7:47 PM CST
Hi Monica,
That poster almost knocked me out of my chair! WOW! It so reminds me of Gabbie.
When we have a sunny day here, I am reminded of a few years ago when I was praying and hoping that Gabbie would be better here on earth. The KARE 11 special of her; the sunny day of her swinging. Her seeming so much like any other little girl until you see the tank John is pulling behind you. I'm just so sad because I know of so many children have been lost to some sort of cancer.
I keep spreading the word of Gabbie - raising awareness. It's very important to me. She is so special.
Hugs to you!
Love,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <desbernhardt@msn.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Wednesday, March 16, 2005 5:16 PM CST
Hey Monica-
The poster is "wow". Thanks for putting it in here for us to see! :0)
Happy belated b-day, Noah! Hope you had a blast.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
GAYLORD, MN USA - Wednesday, March 16, 2005 1:20 PM CST
I am so sorry for your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. From one angel mum to another I send you ((hugs)). I lost my daughter on 1-8-05.
www.myangelteagyn.bravehost.com
www.peroxisomaldisorderawarness.bravehost.com
Nicola <teagynsmum@aol.com>
Virginia Beach, VA - Tuesday, March 15, 2005 1:20 AM CST
Had to laugh when I read that Noah had a low key birthday party. That's what we always tried to have with our own children. Then, when Andrew was in first grade, he came home from school one day and announced that he had invited his entire class to his birthday party. I had to give in since we had just moved there 2 months earlier, and he needed to save face with his classmates...at least he gave me a week and a half window to pull it all together. See what you have to look forward to?
Melody
melody bell
Baltimore, MD - Monday, March 14, 2005 10:27 PM CST
All I can say is wow! Thank you for sharing the poster. She is even looking to the same side as Gabbie in the picture you have posted below the poster. Thanks again - it is powerful.
Carol
- Monday, March 14, 2005 7:52 AM CST
OH MY! The face in the poster is so breathtaking. I can see why you did not see it until afterwards. It really is an incredible likeness to Gabbie.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, - Saturday, March 12, 2005 11:41 PM CST
I ran across this in my email today. I just wanted to share it with you.
Grief is laughing with your children and wishing for the absent one to
make the circle complete.
Grief is crying in your car at stoplights.
Some days grief makes you brutally honest; other days, grief muzzles
you.
Grief reconstructs your heart.
Grief is sadness, hope, smiles and tears - rolled tightly like a
snowball.
Grief makes you search past the stars and the moon for Heaven.
Grief strips you of everything you were pretending to be.
Grief gives you new priorities.
Grief opens hidden treasures from deep within your soul.
Grief allows you to empathize more deeply with others who ache.
Grief makes you unapologetically bold.
Grief is a daily companion, best dealt with by admitting you do walk
with it, even after all these years.
Grief is the price of love; grief is a gift.
Allow yourself time to listen to the sounds of the night and write what
grief is to you.
~reprinted from "How to Make A Family" The Expanded Sky
Blessings,
Nichelle
Adrienne's Mama - http://www.caringbridge.org/tx/adrienne <rejoice_first_lady@yahoo.com>
Cedar Park, TX USA - Saturday, March 12, 2005 3:48 PM CST
Happy Birthday Noah, my gosh I thought you were going to be one, two already!??
Chris - Gooch's mom
- Saturday, March 12, 2005 10:03 AM CST
HI!
Can't believe that Noah is already 2 years old. It just doesn't seem possible. Hope he had a happy, happy birthday. Thinking of all of you today and praying for you too.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
- Saturday, March 12, 2005 9:26 AM CST
Happy, Happy Birthday Noah! What a big boy you are getting to be. You are so lucky to be born into such a wonderful family.
Monica, I was speaking with a friend today who lost her son and thought of you and her pain was so fresh and so heartbreaking. Even getting close to three years without Gabbie, I can imagine the pain isn't as fresh but still so hard to bare.
I had an idea tonight about a fundraiser for neuroblastoma but wanted to talk to you about it first. I will send you an email.
Hugs!
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Friday, March 11, 2005 9:12 PM CST
Hi Monica,
What an adorable photo of Gabbie and Audrey!!!!! Such simple kid pleasures of being out in their bathing suits enjoying the beautiful weather. It breaks my heart that now there is only one little girl left on earth from that picture. Little did you know that you would have a saint so early in heaven. Hoping that Noah stays healthy - he sure is building his immune system!!!!
Love,
Cathy and St. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose, weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Friday, March 11, 2005 3:30 PM CST
Happy 2nd Birthday Noah!!
Jenn Hartley <ronjenn696@prodigy.net>
Bensalem, PA USA - Friday, March 11, 2005 11:47 AM CST
Happy Birthday Mr. Noah Gabriel! Have a wonderful day with lots of cake and party hats. You are a terrific little boy. May God continue to bless you and your beautiful family.
Your Friend, Mary
Mary Akagi <b.akagi@worldnet.att.net>
Maple Grove, MN - Friday, March 11, 2005 8:11 AM CST
Dear Monica,
I'm always thinking of you and Gabbie with love in my heart, and also with much hope for the gift of eternal life from our Savior.
Gabbie truly defines the words; Sweetness, Goodness and Love. What a wonderful example she has set for all of us.
Love and Hugs,
Sara
Vic and Sara <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Thursday, March 10, 2005 10:01 PM CST
Monica and John, I have and always will love Gabbie. Just letting you know you are always in my thoughts and prayers. Love Sarah
Sarah Totall <sarahtotall@hotmail.com>
Minneapolis, MN - Thursday, March 10, 2005 7:26 PM CST
Just a little note to let you know I am praying for you all. I found your site while visting another.
Ann Parkhrust <aparkhurst@warren.k12.ky.us>
bowling green, ky - Wednesday, March 9, 2005 3:28 PM CST
Hi Monica -
I just couldn't let another minute go by without saying how much I adore the picture of the two "bathing beauties"!! So precious and innocent - and yes so cruelly robbed. My heart aches. Thanks for continuing to share your lives with us (total strangers like me) and for continuing to teach us. Always thinking about Gabbie . . . .
Sue Kirtz <skirtz@lmnc.org>
Apple Valley, MN - Wednesday, March 9, 2005 12:49 AM CST
Hey Monica-
I hope Noah is feeling better. Poor little thing - this has been a rough winter for him. How wonderful that Aubrey wanted to go to church so badly. Wow, that is amazing and awesome to see.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
GAYLORD, MN USA - Tuesday, March 8, 2005 10:32 AM CST
Dear Monica,
Thinking of you today as I always do.
Hugs,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Tuesday, March 8, 2005 8:06 AM CST
Hey Monica-
I just said "oooohhh" when I saw that picture of the girls in their suits. That is just adorable. And Gabbie's curls. . . What sweet girls. Breaks my heart that she isn't able to be here to talk about boyfriends, school, etc. with Aubrey and to give Noah a hard time. I am thankful that you have the memories to cherish forever.
PS: As someone else said, could you take a pic of that poster you have? I would love to see it.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
GAYLORD, MN USA - Monday, March 7, 2005 12:52 AM CST
Thinking of you all as I do daily ... loving the picture of Gabbie and Aubrey in their swimsuits ... days of innocence ... thank you Monica for your precious knowledge and THANK YOU for the gift of sharing Gabbie's story with so many ...
God Bless ~ Rebekah Clark
Rebekah <mommy_jaden@yahoo.com>
Prior Lake, MN USA - Monday, March 7, 2005 11:51 AM CST
I wish you could scan the poster or send us a link to what it looks like on the internet - I am sure everyone is interested to see it. Feeling her presence is a wonderful thing for you.
Carol
- Monday, March 7, 2005 8:02 AM CST
Monica,
Those "sad" eyes are not Gabby's, if, what we believe is true, her eyes are sparkling with life and sadness has nothing to do with your little darling. She is more alive than any of us. Jesus made known his love and concern for children, can't you just see Him down "the floor" playing with them. Your babe is in Good Hands.
Dixie <Dixiebly@aol.com>
Boiling Springs, SC - Saturday, March 5, 2005 8:41 AM CST
Hi Monica!! I read your wisdom every day, like my daily devotion. I have great reverence for the little girl that Gabbie was on earth and the mission she came to fulfill. I think she knew it, or was so God-filled she accepted it. She is certainly grace in action.
Dianne Goings <diannegg@earthlink.net>
Prior Lake, MN - Wednesday, March 2, 2005 12:39 AM CST
Hey Monica-
Wow, I just got chills when I read that. Simply Amazing! I couldn't agree with you more.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
GAYLORD, MN USA - Wednesday, March 2, 2005 9:30 AM CST
Monica,
WOW!!!!!!! I'll say that's a signal grace!!!!!!!!!!!!! How beautiful that is the scripture verse that accompanies that poster...I am knocked over by God's loving care of you while you mourn Gabbie's loss. In the smallest of details, he continues to make his presence known! WOW!
God bless you as you miss Gabbie today and know we too are missing that sweet little blond haired gal.
Much love,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose, weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Wednesday, March 2, 2005 9:12 AM CST
Hi Monica,
Thank you for sharing the poster story.
And all the other things that you share on your website as well.
You (and Gabbie) touch so many lives. I hope you know that.
Not a day goes by that I forget to think about Gabbie.
She is in my heart always and I feel so much love for her, even though I was not able to meet her.
But I feel such a connection with her. She has such a beautiful and pure spirit. She is so very special.
God bless you always-
Love, Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Tuesday, March 1, 2005 10:33 PM CST
Monica--haven't written in quite some time...I am still struggling daily to just get through the school day and home chores. But I still visit your site every day, contemplate the many things that you write about (and say "right on sister" since I am of the calvinistic pursuasion, too), and often want to reach out in hugs and prayers. I have broken my silence because I have a broken heart right now...Jay's last days are here...his mom has even started thinking of the funeral, asking The Boychoir which he had been part of and loved so much to sing at it. And so I have a burning question to ask right now: what can I (and other people) do to make this time "easier" for her (though I know that NOTHING will make it so)? What things do you remember people doing that made a difference? It is also difficult since they are in NY at Sloan-Kettering. Virginia had Jay admitted to the hospital on Monday...he is very tired and in pain and they have run out of treatment options. Thanks for any suggestions...thanks for your prayers for Jay right now.
Thinking of you and knowing that it never really gets easy--
Melody
melody bell
baltimore, MD - Tuesday, March 1, 2005 9:31 PM CST
Monica, What a very appropriate poster for you and your family. How very true (once again) are your statements about Gabbie's thorny crown and how Jesus will exchange it for a crown of glory. Thanks for sharing it.
Love, Ivy Ervin <the-ervin-family@earthlink.net http://www.caringbridge.org/oh/lukeervin>
Mansfield, Ohio - Tuesday, March 1, 2005 7:21 PM CST
Thank you Monica for sharing the insights of a Contemporary Virgin and Mary's Faith. Great stuff to think about and ponder and more than likely, so true that our society today would not even allow "the Savior" to be born! I've already printed it out for Bob....looks like a good Sunday school lesson for the senior high class that he teaches at church. I'll say thanks from him in advance!
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, - Monday, February 28, 2005 9:26 PM CST
Visiting as always and praying that our Lord may continue to bless us so much through your journal entries. I am so grateful to have known you.
In His Love, Yolanda <galatians5@truevine.net>
Altamonte Springs, FL USA - Monday, February 28, 2005 7:33 PM CST
OH Monica, How true are your words today!!! How very desperately we are in need of our Saviour, yet how foolishly we would discard Him thinking we were being righteous....Thank you for this poignant insight. I do not know the first author but am inspired by Yancey as well. Thank you for speaking the truth and being one of Christ's lights in this very dark world! Love,
Monte and Ivy Ervin *** forever missing Lukie*** <the-ervin-family@earthlink.net http://www.caringbridge.org/oh/lukeervin>
Mansfield, Ohio - Monday, February 28, 2005 7:23 PM CST
Dear Monica,
Stopping by to let you know that I am praying for you to have a good week filled with blessings from above. Hope the household is all staying well.
Gabbie, you so deserved to be Aubrey's sister for more than a little while. I am sorry you had to leave so quickly, but rejoice for your eternal life through the salvation of our Lord and savior, Jesus Christ.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
- Monday, February 28, 2005 10:58 AM CST
I got your website from someone else's. Prayers for your family.....
www.caringbridge.org/mn/jadedieger
Angel Jade's Mommy <jkitties@cloudnet.com>
Foley, MN USa - Sunday, February 27, 2005 10:14 AM CST
Hi Monica. Thanks so much for visiting Reid's page and for your encouraging words. I read some of your journals and enjoyed all the pictures of your beautiful children. Although I wish none of us had to be here, reading some of your heart and soul from your entries has helped encourage me. It's always wonderful to meet those who keep believing and keep giving in the midst of the storms.
Blessings to all of you
love,hope, courage
Carol
mom to Riley, Reagan, Reese and our forever baby Reid
Carol (Reid's page) <dmill3@insightbb.com>
Bowling Green, KY - Saturday, February 26, 2005 10:20 PM CST
Dear Monica,
Thinking of you today and always.
Big Ben Bowen earned his wings yesterday. Please say prayers for this family. The last few weeks have been excrutiating as they had a difficult time controlling his pain. I am thankful he is at peace.
http://www.bens-story.com
Hugs to you!
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Saturday, February 26, 2005 7:10 AM CST
Hey Monica-
I'm hoping the kids start feeling better soon. It seems as though when one gets better the ones start to get sick and it's a never ending cycle. . . I just get anxious for Spring and maybe it will all be better.
Hope you are having a good day.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
GAYLORD, MN USA - Thursday, February 24, 2005 4:18 PM CST
Hi Monica,
I'm sorry that you have had such a hard time with illnesses this winter! That must be frustrating. Praying you are on your way to a healthy household. I love the new pictures, the one of the girls and the ones of Aubrey and Noah. Take care and God bless you!
Love,
Jen
Jen Buckentine Zachary's Site <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Wednesday, February 23, 2005 8:53 PM CST
What an adorable pic of the girls. One to treasure forever. :0)
Hope you are having a good day today and hope the kids are doing well.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
GAYLORD, MN USA - Wednesday, February 23, 2005 3:54 PM CST
Dearest Monica,
I love the pic of the girls. It is so sweet.
As far as church goes, I believe that you two attending different churches will be beneficial to your children. They will be able to experience each religion and decide their own path. What a great gift you are giving them! I grew up Southern Baptist and am a convert to the Catholic church. I know from my experience I think I am a little more open to other religions than some people I know. Just my input there!
Take care!!
Hugs,
Susan
http://www.caringbridge.com/mn/zacharybern
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Wednesday, February 23, 2005 8:18 AM CST
Sorry to hear about all the illness at your house. We've got a touch of it too...our Gabbie has her first US ear infection, and was at the doctor's yesterday. We're doing the wonderful 'pink stuff' and sleeping on Mommy, while she walks the floor. :) Pete is on his second cold this month, but doesn't appear to feel too crummy with it.
I don't attend an E-Free church, but attend my bereaved parents support group at one. I have attended their services a time or two, and believe it would be a good fit for me too... if it weren't so far from home. I think it's kind of good that your kids will be exposed to two different doctrines, that way they can make an 'educated' decision when the time comes. I hope you all are feeling well in no time. God bless. with love
jan livingstone (Andy's mom forever)
- Wednesday, February 23, 2005 8:16 AM CST
Hello Monica,
What a cute picture of the girls! Gabbie looks so precious with her chunky cheeks!
Jenn Hartley <ronjenn696@prodigy.net>
Bensalem, PA - Wednesday, February 23, 2005 6:45 AM CST
Beautiful photo of the girls... My heart aches to know they'll never hold each other again on this earth.... As for your church dilemma, I think you are doing the right thing Monica. It is such a tough decision. I pray John is being called by God to his catholicsm and not by tradition or from lack of searching. You know I too struggle with those who are catholic....And Monte and I pray that same prayer over Joscelyn and Dane- choose the Saviour's path children. I pray the Lord is with all of us and continues to make His prescense known- to us and through us. In His love,
Monte and Ivy Ervin ***forever missing Lukie*** <the-ervin-family@earthlink.net http://www.caringbridge.org/oh/lukeervin>
Mansfield, OHio - Tuesday, February 22, 2005 8:22 PM CST
Hey Monica-
I'm sorry for not letting you know about Bracken. For some reason, this weekend was just too overwhelming for me reading about Ben Bowen and Melody and then knowing what was going on with Bracken. There a new site I found and it's about a young man named Jaysen. He needs a bone marrow transplant and a donor can't be found. The docs have given him 2 weeks and that was about a week ago. He doesn't have any family or friends and so he's in the hospital all alone. I have been keeping in touch with him and slowly his website is getting "out there" and more people are getting on the registry. Hopefully a donor can be found!! I don't know why all of this hit this weekend, but it was just overwhelming and I found myself asking "why" a lot and I know I shouldn't be doing that. Then seeing how strong Suzi is being. . . wow. I know you, Monica, are so very strong as well and I have commented to you and Suzi that I don't know if I could be as strong. I'm going to list Jaysen's website below and if anyone would like to visit it, he would be so thankful!!
http://www3.caringbridge.org/pa/paperkyut/
Thanks, Monica for all you do.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
GAYLORD, MN USA - Tuesday, February 22, 2005 10:49 AM CST
Praying that Noah is completely well very soon. Praying for peace for you and John. God bless.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
- Tuesday, February 22, 2005 9:39 AM CST
Monica,
My tears came w/o warning, seeing your handstamped picture of the two bonnet girls. It is Gabbie and Theresa (and so many of the other children in heaven) planting seeds and I just miss those punkins so much. God's ways are certainly not our ways, but oh I need continued grace to accept that their deaths are for His greater good.
God bless you and thank you for the beautiful hand-stamped picture!
Love,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose, WeLoveTeesa@earthlink.net>
St. Paul, MN United States - Monday, February 21, 2005 3:08 PM CST
Hi Monica, Bracken Pohl passed away this evening at 5:03. I know you have been praying for his family and will continue to do so. May God bless you and all that you do.
Love, Mary
Mary Akagi <b.akagi@worldnet.att.net>
Maple Grove, MN - Sunday, February 20, 2005 9:05 PM CST
Hi Monica,
Just wanted to say Hello and tell you that, as always, you are in my heart and prayers. Thank you for your continued journeling and sharing. It is appreciated by many and really makes a difference. You and Saint Gabbie touch so many hearts and always will.
Love,
Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Friday, February 18, 2005 6:27 PM CST
Monica,
Thank you for continuing to write so faithfully on Gabrielle's webpage. I come here a few times a week, and it helps me deal with the trials we are going through.
Be Blessed
Craig Levine daddy to Elijah <wakbyfaith@yahoo.com>
Pawnee, IL - Friday, February 18, 2005 3:42 PM CST
Monica,
Thank you for the card you sent to our family. It is nice to know that people do care.
Maybe we can meet for coffee sometime?
Jennifer Miles www.caringbridge.org/mn/deemartinson <jennifer.miles@thomson.com>
Minneapolis, MN USA - Thursday, February 17, 2005 2:42 PM CST
Pancake syrup for spikey hair huh?! LOL>>> The worst part for Noah was that the smell of it probably kept his tummy hungry all day! Stay well Paquette's!
Love, Ivy Ervin <the-ervin-family@earthlink.net http://www.caringbridge.org/oh/lukeervin>
Mansfield, Ohio - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 8:39 PM CST
Oh Monica...Aubrey was ministering in her own way to those little bald babies. That is so beautiful and I can totally understand what a sad sight it must have been. God bless her purity and God bless all the caregivers who take care of actual cancer kids...
Love to you,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose, weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 3:06 PM CST
Thinking of you always.
Shannon Hujanen <hujanenfamily@mcleodusa.net>
Blaine, MN USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 10:20 AM CST
Hey Monica-
Ok, I admit it. I chuckled when I read about you making a wrong turn. I do it as well, and I also can't tell directions. I only know which direction I am when I'm in my home town. I know, I can tell you have a smile on your face now, I'm sure of it! :0) Jon gets so mad at me because he will give me directions by telling me go North here and then go West at such and such a street. I'm more of a turn by the red barn and when you have gotten to the cow pasture, you've gone too far. Yes, for those of you reading this, I live in a very small town.
I just wanted you to know I stopped by today. I hope your Valentine's Day was ok.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
GAYLORD, MN USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 12:27 AM CST
Dear Monica,
While it makes most people uncomfortable to see children with bald heads because they know what they are going through, it must be very difficult for you.
The loss of Stanton, Big Ben being comatose is just really weighing on me and I feel like I should step back but I can't. I don't know these people but I visit their sites regularly and I can't not do it as painful as it is.
Marriage is hard - nobody really tells you that when you get married. It's so worth it but very, very hard.
Hugs,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 7:50 AM CST
Dearest Monica,
Another has been lost to the beast, Neuroblastoma. Sweet little Stanton earned his wings this morning.
http://www.caringbridge.com/la/stanton
I am glad he is not suffering any longer, my heart just breaks for his family.
We have to do something in this world so parents and sisters and brothers quit losing this little ones.
Everytime I see the picture of Gabbie on the front page, it breaks my heart. I can't imagine having to see your child that way.
Hugs to you!
God Bless,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Sunday, February 13, 2005 10:53 AM CST
BrendaDave's Site <brurka@shaw.ca>
Edmonton,Alberta Canada, - Sunday, February 13, 2005 2:22 AM CST
Monica,
I have not commented on the last picture of Gabbie because I know there are no words to say for such a picture. It is so painful for me to look at, I cannot even imagine what feelings it brings to the surface for you and John. I have VERY similar pictures of my son, Jim, from the 2 1/2 months he spent in the NICU as a 2 lb. premie. I can remember seeing the pictures a year or two later and becoming literally sick to my stomach at the memory. The difference is that Jim is here and Gabbie is not, and for that I am so sorry and literally cry for you. I so wish things could have been different for Gabbie here on earth. It is so sad to me that her short time on earth was spent so filled with sadness, stuggle and suffering. Honestly, the picture TRULY haunts me because I know Gabbie is no longer with you and my son is. I am really so genuinely sorry for that. I always pray for you and your family. God bless.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
- Saturday, February 12, 2005 4:02 PM CST
1001 hugs to a very special family~
Your Gabrielle will never be forgotten..ever!!
I went to Stantons site and as soon as I saw his precious little face, I broke down...how very sad!
Why is this happening to all these little kids?? It is so unfair, so very unfair.. all these families hurting so badly and there is nothing anyone can do for them.. they are empty, broken and hopeless.. it just breaks my heart!!
Give your kids a huge hug from me..
I think about you all everyday!
Lots of Love~
Sheryl
Sheryl Gunzenhauser <mik181@mchsi.com>
Winnebago, MN - Thursday, February 10, 2005 6:41 PM CST
1,000 days - doesn't seem like it was that long ago I was hoping and praying for a miracle for Gabbie. I thank God for Gabbie's life. She has brought so much to the world; more than most people do in a lifetime.
The mention of my child's name
May bring tears to my eyes,
But it never fails to bring
Music to my ears.
If you are really my friend,
Let me hear the beautiful music of her name.
It soothes my broken heart
And sings to my soul."
Author Unknown
Hugs to you!
God Bless,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Thursday, February 10, 2005 7:46 AM CST
Thinking of you on day 1,001. May God bless you all.
Mary Akagi <b.akagi@worldnet.att.net>
Maple Grove, MN - Thursday, February 10, 2005 7:46 AM CST
A thousand days must seem like forever.....my heart grieves for you.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, - Thursday, February 10, 2005 0:18 AM CST
Monica and John,
I'm sorry it has been so long - 1000 days - since Gabbie died. It is painful to think it was so long ago that you held her, but at the same time, each day that passes is one day closer to seeing her again with our Heavenly Father. We think about you often and hold you in prayer.
Love,
The Buckentine's
Jen Buckentine Zachary's Site <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Wednesday, February 9, 2005 10:07 PM CST
Monica,
Wow, such a profound observation about God being faithful in good and bad. Thank you for sharing both your pain and your wisdom gained through that same pain. How blessed I am to have you for a friend!
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose, weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Wednesday, February 9, 2005 3:59 PM CST
Hey Monica-
Letting you know I stopped by.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
GAYLORD, MN USA - Wednesday, February 9, 2005 3:45 PM CST
Dear Monica and Family,
1000 ((HUGS)) are being sent to you today, your 1000th earthly day without Precious Gabbie. Thank you for sharing her with all of us, her life has helped to shape my life into something better. She is an inspiration, as is your family. You are deep in my thoughts today. Today I will light a candle for your Gabbie!
Jenn Hartley <ronjenn696@prodigy.net>
Bensalem, PA USA - Wednesday, February 9, 2005 6:52 AM CST
Monica, as usual, your poignant entry has struck a nerve. I too cannot count how many times I've heard those very same comments and how much it breaks my heart. I have two very close friends who lost both of their sweet babies to MPS disorders. God was just as faithful to them as He is to those whose children survive and His heart breaks over the sufferings of these innocent children even more than ours do. If anything, the loss of my own two babies to miscarriage makes me much more aware of my own comments as I know how deeply I was hurt when comments were made that I could just have another one, like I was replacing a piece of Tupperware. I do know that God was faithful to me or I would never have gotten through it. I'm so very sorry your pain is added to by the comments of others as if losing your precious daughter was not enough. God bless.
Robin Boger <Robin.Boger@rbc.com>
Lewisville, NC - Tuesday, February 8, 2005 9:30 PM CST
Dear Monica,
The comments you stated and similar remarks that people make have always bothered me. Even more so since I have discovered Caringbridge and read so many grief stricken parents comments of what they go through each day after their child has died. So many times I have had to bite my tongue and not respond back to the insensitivity of such a comment. Later, I will always say something to Bob, such as, so I guess God wasn't faithful to (insert Caringbridge family here) because (insert Caringbridge child name here) died?! He always just shakes his head in a painful way because he too now realizes how inappropriate and insensitive such a comment is since his wife has found the Caringbridge community. It is through your words and Gabbie's site (and others like yours) that many have become more aware of where our Lord wants our hearts, minds and mouths to be. I have even discussed such topics with close friends and they have become more aware at how insensitive such remarks are. It is a way that you are making a difference in the lives of those that come here and then it continues to spread from there. I am sorry that such comments have been made in your presence. The comments have to be so hard to swallow. Please don't beat yourself up about working while Gabbie was sick. We all have things that we have done, that we would do differently if we knew the outcome. The fact that you are able and willing to write the words may change another mother's mind about what she is choosing to do and for that I admire and respect you. God entrusted Gabbie to you during her short time on earth and that was and is His plan for both of you. Yes, God is good all the time and all things work together for good for those who love the Lord. Praying for you always.
In His love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, - Monday, February 7, 2005 6:10 PM CST
Oooh, Monica-
My heart is truly breaking. . . It looks like there was a tear that was falling. Even though she is no longer with you here on earth, I am thanking God that she is not suffering anymore. I'm praying for all of the families that are going through this.
Tearfully yours.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
GAYLORD, MN USA - Monday, February 7, 2005 10:46 AM CST
So very sorry.....
Jenn Hartley <ronjenn696@prodigy.net>
- Monday, February 7, 2005 6:59 AM CST
I AM SO SORRY FOR ALL THE PAIN YOUR FAMILY HAS BEEN THROUGH. YOUR FAMILY IS IN MY THOUGHTS AND PRAYERS.
CARINGBRIDGE.ORG/WV/FREDAFOX
RUTH <BLUEEYED_FEMALE@MSN.COM>
HINTON, WV - Sunday, February 6, 2005 4:25 PM CST
The newest picture of Gabbie makes my heart sick. I can't imagine all you have went through.
Another family is about to lose their son to neuroblastoma.
http://www2.caringbridge.org/la/stanton/
Stanton has spent half of his three years battling this disease but there is nothing more to be done.
My heart is heavy thinking of another momma about to lose her baby to this.
Hugs,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
zimmerman, MN - Sunday, February 6, 2005 9:44 AM CST
Hi Monica, Thanks for the big announcement! We are incredible happy; sleep deprived, and loving it! I'll try and send you a picture of our little angels soon. (when I get a spare minute) :) God is good!
jan livingstone (Andy's mom forever)
- Saturday, February 5, 2005 7:21 PM CST
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
PS: hope you can enjoy the beautiful weather today and tomorrow! :0)
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
GAYLORD, MN USA - Friday, February 4, 2005 2:08 PM CST
Monica- I just got done reading Grandma "Ette"'s letter to Gabbie back when she had died... I am soooo immersed in the emotion and love she felt for Gabbie... In time I will go back and read more from your journal history. You are such an inspiration and light for those of us who have joined (ungratefully) the bereaved parents club. We so look forward to meeting Gabbie in heaven some day. Love and prayers
Ivy Ervin *** Forever missing Lukie*** <the-ervin-family@earthlink.net http://www.caringbridge.org/oh/lukeervin>
Mansfield, Ohio - Thursday, February 3, 2005 8:10 PM CST
Dear Monica,
Thank you for adding prayers for Marko to your site. Steve and Becky need them.
I am exhausted - Marko's funeral was this afternoon and it was the most difficult thing I have ever gone to. It was the most beautiful service and incredibly sad.
I am praying tonight for all who have lost a child. The strength to continue in life has to be enormous and I'm not sure I could do it.
Hugs to you!
Love,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
zimmerman, MN - Tuesday, February 1, 2005 10:10 PM CST
Dear Monica,
I'm sitting here this morning and am thinking of you, John, Aubrey, Noah, and of course, Gabbie. We made a trip to Children's on Friday, and it brought back so many memories. When I saw the chairs by the elevator on the 8th floor, it brought me back to the night you and I sat there talking and crying--hoping for a miracle for both of our children.
Love, Janine
J. Nielsen
Minneapolis, MN USA - Monday, January 31, 2005 6:56 AM CST
Monica,
Stopping by in the early morning hours to pray for you, John, Aubrey and Noah. As you well know, Gabbie no longer needs my prayers. Gabbie "IS" an inspiration and always will be!! Hope you are having a good weekend.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, - Sunday, January 30, 2005 0:12 AM CST
Dear Monica,
I visit Gabbie's site faithfully every day even if I don't sign the guestbook. It's been very tough lately. Hannah's teachers son, Marko, passed away this week and it is so hard. Please say prayers for them:
http://www.caringbridge.com/mn/markobratulich
Kylie is having a tough time as well. Her after surgery pictures remind me of Gabbie:
http://www2.caringbridge.org/ga/kyliescorner/
I hope the fraud situation clears quickly - people have a lot of nerve!
I can't imagine the pain you experience after losing a child. I know that Marko's parents will live with that the rest of their lives as well. I wish so much I could help ease some of the pain everyone feels after suffering such a tragedy. I just don't think there's anything I can do or say.
Hugs!!
God Bless,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
zimmerman, MN - Saturday, January 29, 2005 5:20 PM CST
Monica- I was thinking about you...just wanted to say hello. :)
Michelle Espeseth
- Saturday, January 29, 2005 12:59 AM CST
Hi Monica,
I love the new piece that you stamped - "faithfully planting seeds!" How very appropriate. Thank you for sharing Jesus in this dark world. We would love to see you guys! However, it may have to wait until after tax season. I will let you know. Have a good weekend.
Love and God bless,
Jen
Jen Buckentine ~ Zachary's Page ~ <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Friday, January 28, 2005 12:46 AM CST
Monica,
The loss of Gabbie has created such a big hole that will only be filled when she's back in your arms in heaven. Sending you loving thoughts and prayers today...
God bless,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose, weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, - Friday, January 28, 2005 12:06 AM CST
Hello, sorry I haven't signed in so very long. But, I do check often. :) So sorry to read about your fraud dilemma. I will pray for those who did it, that their hearts will be turned in the right direction. And, keeping you in my prayers that things will be resolved in a timely manner. I agree with the abortion issue, so sad that people choose that alternative when there are other choices. Precious lives lost, never given a chance. God knows "each of us by name" from before conception....how sad that we humans take it into our own hands to be "rid" of one of God's children.
Blessings,
Eileen
www.caringbridge.org/il/ej
EJ's Caring Place
- Friday, January 28, 2005 1:11 AM CST
The Lord really had you on my heart tonight so I wanted to leave a message and let you know. Also, I hate it when the devil steals. I love it when God repays us 10-fold :) I am praying for your fraud situation. One of my co-workers had her social security number stolen recently and she cannot do any kind of business transactions or anything--she can't even log into email at work!! People really need prayer. If they can use all that intelligence to commit crimes, why in the world can't they just go get a job that would pay them for using their intelligence legally??!!??!! Anyways, I love you and am praying for you. Please don't hesitate to let me know if you need me for anything. I am here!
Khalita Duke Peds BMT Aplastic Anemia My Caringbridge Site Duke Peds BMT Aplastic Anemia <khalita@hecaresonline.org>
Lexington, NC - Wednesday, January 26, 2005 9:01 PM CST
Monica-
Oh my gosh! I can't believe it! Well, I can, but you know what I mean. :0) What scam artists. My gosh, coming to pick it up? That does take nerve. Hopefully they catch these thieves quickly. Please keep us updated.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
GAYLORD, MN USA - Tuesday, January 25, 2005 4:09 PM CST
Monica & Family,
I have a daughter named Gabrielle. She is 3 1/2 and she has battled cancer and so far she is winning. It breaks my heart to read about your little Gabrielle. She was such an inspiration. And she had a beautiful smile to light up the world.
May God Bless
Sheena &Gabrielle
www.caringbridge.org/la/gabbylou
Sheena <sheenajennings@hotmail.com>
Port Barre, LA USA - Saturday, January 22, 2005 10:50 PM CST
Yes Monica, you are right. Abortion = broken hearts, broken lives. The heart never heals for a mother(and father) that choose to abort their baby.
Debbie Nagy
- Saturday, January 22, 2005 1:38 PM CST
Hey Monica-
So very, very true. I couldn't agree with you more. There are so many people who would give anything to have a child and they just can't and then to hear how many abortions there are is just infuriating to me. The lives of so many innocent children are lost. . . I hope they won't be forgotten.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
GAYLORD, MN USA - Friday, January 21, 2005 2:14 PM CST
Your website touched my heart, you have a beautiful angel in heaven.
Darla (Angel Matt's mom 7-3-90-4-22-04) <DLinden73@aol.com www.caringbridge.org/in/angelbarneyboo>
IN - Wednesday, January 19, 2005 9:09 PM CST
Thinking of you always,you are in my thoughts and in my prayers.
Brenda http://www2.caringbridge.org/ca/daverurka/ <rurka70@hotmail.com>
Edmonton, AB Canada - Wednesday, January 19, 2005 2:56 PM CST
Hi Monica,
My heart and prayers certainly going out to the Bowen family...Their story just breaks my heart.
Your handstamping was so beautiful. How I wish we did not live in a society that accepts the killing of children.
So much sadness isn't it..
Love to all,
Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Tuesday, January 18, 2005 10:39 PM CST
Monica-
Thank you for being our inspiration and friend on this journey. I sooo look forward to greeting Gabbie in heaven someday. We love the whole Paquette family. May God bless your week. Love, Ivy
Monte and Ivy Ervin <the-ervin-family@earthlink.net http://www.caringbridge.org/oh/lukeervin>
Mansfield, Ohio - Tuesday, January 18, 2005 8:09 PM CST
Hello Monica and prescious Gabrielle ... I wanted to stop in to say hello and thank you for the Break Point Article ... thinking of you always ... thanking you for sharing so much of your pain and thanking Gabbie for helping me find the Lord ... hope you are surviving this awful Minnesota cold ... wishing things were oh so different ... God Bless
Rebekah Clark <mommy_jaden@yahoo.com>
Prior Lake, MN USA - Tuesday, January 18, 2005 10:13 AM CST
Hi Monica,
Thanks for adding Ben to your journal. I hope they are able to control his pain SOON!
Sounds like a fun-filled weekend at your house. Even when things happen when friends are over, it doesn't matter. They love being invited and having fun. That's what matters! I've had some of Hannah's friends over and things happen and I think no way are they ever going to wanna come here again, but they always do.
Gabbie is on my mind (as she is often)as I visit the site of Kylie Barry.
http://www2.caringbridge.org/ga/kyliescorner/index.htm
She has Stage 3 Neuroblastoma and had surgery to remove her tumor today in New York. They got 80% of it and she will now have radiation. Hers is very aggressive so please add her to the non-ending prayer list.
I feel like I need to do something - this beast of a cancer must be cured. Families shouldn't have to endure this torture.
I'm having a down day. Hugs to you!!
Love,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, mn - Tuesday, January 18, 2005 0:28 AM CST
Monica,
Thank you for including Ben's website. Their situation reminds me so much of Zachary's last days with us. My heart just aches for them; I have had them on my mind and in my prayers all day long.
As hard as it is to see these little ones suffer so - and to see the latest pictures you have shared of Gabbie's PICU stay - we know that God loves us so very much. I couldn't get through a day on this earth without knowing that a more glorious day awaits us in eternity. I know that is what sustains you too.
Thinking of you, John, Aubrey, Noah and St. Gabbie today.
Love,
Jen
Jen Buckentine Zachary's Site <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Monday, January 17, 2005 9:03 PM CST
Hey Monica-
I tried placing an entry earlier, but I noticed it didn't show up. Thanks for all you do, Monica. Thanks also for letting us know about Ben's site and what's going on. I think someone else also put an entry about him. Thank you!
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
GAYLORD, MN USA - Monday, January 17, 2005 6:38 PM CST
I am asking for prayers for Ben Bowen. He is in the last stages of his disease and his parents are having such a hard time getting his pain under control. He is not sleeping, just agitated. I feel so horrible for this 2yr old boy who has gone through so much. I pray that his last days will be peaceful and free of pain as much as possible.
http://www.bens-story.com/pages/3/index.htm
His family has lots of faith and never (outwardly) waivered with all they have gone through.
Please take a moment and pray for them or sign their guestbook.
God Bless,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, mn - Monday, January 17, 2005 8:18 AM CST
1000 days, 100 days, 10 days, 1 day. . . Since Anna's departure time has remarkably stood still while I race ahead, or, maybe it has been the other way around. Maybe I'm the one standing still. Nevertheless, they are forever in our today. I came across this going through my old journals and thought I would share it with you, beloved friend:
"I make pleasant songs, and weave verses, because my soul longs for You. Even as I speak of Your glorious power,it is Your love my heart desires. So may all my thoughts be sweet before You, because my soul longs for You." Yes, we long and yearn for Heaven. And God Who listens to our prayers and hears our needs has made it even sweeter by placing our daughters there.
In His Love,
Yolanda
http://www.galatians5.com
Mom to Anna <galatians5@truevine.net>
Altamonte Springs, FL USA - Sunday, January 16, 2005 3:25 PM CST
1,000 Days?! Wow.......it seems so long ago but it also doesn't that I was sitting here at my computer crying my eyes out after reading on 5/17/2002 that Gabbie had passed. It was so devastating because I truely believed she would be healed. I prayed and I prayed but it was not meant to be.
I can imagine how you miss her because I have three kids but I can never really know how much it hurts.
Thinking of you.
Hugs,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, mn - Friday, January 14, 2005 7:52 PM CST
Thinking and praying for you today and everyday.
Jennifer Miles www.caringbridge.org/mn/deemartinson <jennifer.miles@thomson.com>
Minneapolis, MN USA - Friday, January 14, 2005 9:14 AM CST
A picture truely is worth a thousand words. What can you say...nothing.
Rhonda Meyer <rschultz@scl.doc.state.mn.us>
- Thursday, January 13, 2005 12:22 AM CST
Dear Monica,
I am thankful that even through all of your tremendous grief you realize the joy of where Gabbie is now. Bless you.
Love always,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, - Wednesday, January 12, 2005 5:45 PM CST
Monica,
I find that picture of Gabbie haunting. I can't stand the thought of the wee little ones in the world suffering. Yet it happens every day.
I created a page for Zachary. Hope you can visit sometime.
http://www.caringbridge.org/mn/zacharybern/
Prayers and hugs to you!!
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, mn - Wednesday, January 12, 2005 4:00 PM CST
Oh momma Monica,
In her lowliness she is so pure and holy...God stripped away everything from her to show his majesty through her suffering. That picture is incredibly touching, sweet Gabbie was -and is- a great soldier for Christ.
It was so good to be w/you at the bible study. Thank you for sacrificing family time, I know it is so precious.
Much love & w/a heart aching for you,
Cathy & st. Theresa Rose <WeLoveTeesa@earthlink.net, www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose>
St. Paul, MN United States - Tuesday, January 11, 2005 7:37 PM CST
Monica looking at the picture really broke my heart, to see how much Gabbie suffered, I do see the tear and it makes me sad to think what she might of been thinking or in pain. Cancer is so awful, especially Neuroblastoma seems to be one of the worst ones to cure. Cancer just stinks period I don't think there anyone out there who doesn't have a love one or knows someone with cancer, it's truly devistating. I"m still going through my own grief from losing my mom in September from AML, some days are easy but alot of days it feels so unreal and I can't help but feel so overwelmed with grief. I'm so glad you have so much trust in god, as that is my comfert with my mom that she was a devoted christian and had faith till her earthly end, she was not afraid of dying because ultimetly she knew where who true home was.
I will keep praying for you and your family Gabbie will always have a special place in my heart.
Sincerely
Sally Torres <sally_torres@lusknet.com>
Anaheim, ca - Tuesday, January 11, 2005 6:05 PM CST
Monica-
I admit that picture took my breath away. I may have even gasped. It rips my heart out seeing her like that. However, I do feel comforted in knowing that she knew her family was always with her and that she could count on getting her strength and courage from you. She did fight her battle with more strength and courage than anyone I know. She truly was a remarkable little girl and she has touched so many lives. I do see the silent tear. . .
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
GAYLORD, MN USA - Tuesday, January 11, 2005 1:44 PM CST
Dear Monica,
Yes, I see the tear. I imagine the tear in the picture is due to her suffering, and I cannot help but think of the tear fom heaven that dropped to the world at the end of the "Passion of the Christ". I hope you don't mind me saying that my tears as I write this are not for Gabbie's suffering, but "tears of joy" as I think of what she has gained in her death. The ultimate victory and joy of being in God's presence have become hers and rightfully so, for all that she did have to suffer. I hope and pray that because you believe in the free gift of eternal salvation that you too can find a way to have "tears of joy" for her. Please know that I am not diminishing or trying to take away from your profound grief. I can only imagine how difficult it is to see these "lost" pictures. I just hope that you look at them and are able to remember where she WAS and where she IS. I am sorry if any of what I have written was inappropriate, it was just what entered my mind (and heart) when I saw the tear.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
- Tuesday, January 11, 2005 11:54 AM CST
Monica & family,
You are all in my thoughts today, as is your precious angel Gabbie...
Sincerely,
Colette
Colette Bonavita **Friends of Allie**
Warren, PA - Tuesday, January 11, 2005 10:23 AM CST
Dear Monica,
Words are so inadequate. Grieving with you.
God bless,
Michelle
Michelle Rice <michelle.rice@gpmlaw.com>
Forest Lake, MN - Tuesday, January 11, 2005 10:10 AM CST
You are all in my prayers...
May you find comfort knowing that your
beautiful Gabbie is looking down upon
you with eyes full of love....
God Bless...
Jennifer (CagedKids & Friends of Allie) <tag@cagedkids.com>
Fancy Gap, VA U S A - Tuesday, January 11, 2005 9:41 AM CST
Hello Monica.. It's so sad to see this picture...
When we took our Christmas decorations down I was thinking about the holidays... how every year Christmas comes, everything is a whirlwind..shopping, baking, whatnot. Then comes New Years, where it really gets chilly here. Then the long awaited spring arrives..we enjoy it..then summer... where's it's hot and we enjoy that, too! Then fall comes with it's beautiful breeze and breathtaking colors..then back to Thanksgiving and Christmas. It's a cycle that we welcome every year. But thinking about it this year is different...your family popped into my mind. I thought about how we look forward to the warm weather and being outdoors in the springtime...and how the past 3 years your family has something you don't want to look forward to in the Spring .. Gabbie's passing date. May has always been my favorite month, I've always wanted a May baby... The beautiful month of May has a different meaning now.
My heart is forever touched by your Gabbie and your faith and your road that you're on. Thank You for your friendship.
Jenn Hartley <ronjenn696@prodigy.net>
- Tuesday, January 11, 2005 9:28 AM CST
Oh Monica, I'm so sorry. Such a precious child, with so much suffering. I thank God that she, along with Connor and many others, NEVER have to suffer again. They fought a good fight, they finished the race, they have received their Heavenly reward. Oh what a day when we are reunited with our "babies".
Love, hugs and prayers,
Rhonda, Forever Connor's Mommy
<rshunley@comcast.net>
Hendersonville, TN
**May God bless the Tsunami victims**
**God Bless America and our Troops and Leaders!** - Monday, January 10, 2005 8:40 PM CST
And a tear is running down my cheek as I gaze at her picture...I have no words, only my most heartfelt thoughts and prayers.
Robin Boger <Robin.Boger@rbc.com>
Lewisville, NC - Monday, January 10, 2005 8:37 PM CST
You are all in my prayers. Gabby is a happy beautiful Angel watching over you.
Love and prayers,
Debbie from the Bridge Of Dreams and Friends of Allie <debbie@bridgeofdreams.org>
VA USA - Monday, January 10, 2005 8:11 PM CST
My heart goes out to you! Sending love and prayers!
Becka *Friends of Allie* <rlmarsch@nycap.rr.com>
Delmar, NY USA - Monday, January 10, 2005 7:51 PM CST
The picture of Gabbie broke my heart completely in two. I can't even begin to imagine how you felt when you saw it.
Thank God she is no longer suffering.
((BIG HUGS))
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, mn - Monday, January 10, 2005 7:42 PM CST
Oh Monica, My heart just aches for ALL of you... to find undeveloped pictures is a treasure. To see what was on the film, torturous. Gabbie fought valiantly and WON! She is now free and in the company of our Lord. Her suffering has ended. Ours continues. Holding you all in prayer. We love you
Monte and Ivy Ervin ***forever missing Lukie*** <ivymeadows@earthlink.net http://www.caringbridge.org/oh/lukeervin>
Mansfield, Ohio - Monday, January 10, 2005 7:28 PM CST
Monica,
As soon as I saw the picture of Gabbie, I right away noticed what I thought was a tear running down her cheek and it made me cry thinking about what your precious Gabbie had to go through in her short sweet life .. so sad, so very sad!!
She like all the others will never be forgotten!
God Bless
Lots of Love,
Angel Sheryl
Sheryl Gunzenhauser <mik181@mchsi.com>
Winnebago, Mn - Monday, January 10, 2005 6:56 PM CST
Monica ~ I sit here and cry today - for the loss of Gabbie ... my heart is broken ... You are so right ... United in SUFFERING ... in the end Gabbie is the one who's "lucky" ... she fullfilled her tasks on earth oh SO early and got to go home ... THANK YOU Gabbie for showing me the way towards home ... Monica ... please know I am here for you always!
God Bless
Rebekah Clark <mommy_jaden@yahoo.com>
Prior Lake, MN USA - Monday, January 10, 2005 6:52 PM CST
This picture breaks my heart. I am so very sorry. Please know of my continued love and prayers.
Mary Akagi <b.akagi@worldnet.att.net>
Maple Grove, MN - Monday, January 10, 2005 6:52 PM CST
Monica,
Hope you are receiving much from the Bible study today. May the study encourage you and lift you up as your read and learn even more of God's wonderful truth. I am praying that the multiple identity theft situation will get rectified very quickly and there will be no ongoing back lash. I know identity theft can be a living nightmare. It sounds as though you and John have caught yours in the very early stages. The picture of Gabbie continues to tear at my heart each time I come to her site. I continue to be so moved by her strength and beauty.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, - Saturday, January 8, 2005 12:14 AM CST
Please pray for the family of Cameron Brecka. He passed away late last night.
http://www3.caringbridge.org/ne/camer/index.htm
Jack Corbo is going home tomorrow! YEAH!!
http://www.caringbridge.com/mn/corboboys
Hugs,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Friday, January 7, 2005 4:21 PM CST
The picture of Gabbie breaks my heart. The suffering is so obvious. While finding you have pictures never developed is a gift, I imagine it's so very, very hard to look at. Brings those memories flooding back..........
Jenny Scott has started a non-profit with another mom who lost her daughter to AML. It's called Heroes for Children.
http://www.heroesforchildren.com
Jenny was also featured on the news and it breaks your heart as well.
http://www.wfaa.com/sharedcontent/dws/wfaa/localnews/news8/stories/wfaa050106_am_babyallie.845a49c2.html
So if anyone is looking to donate funds, laptops, look to heros for children.
Gabbie is my hero and so are you, Monica!
Hugs,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Friday, January 7, 2005 8:57 AM CST
I will always cry with you...the loss of children is so intensely sad...
Love,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose, weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Thursday, January 6, 2005 10:11 PM CST
Dear Monica,
Thank you for sharing your photos. Gabbie's suffering was so evident. Still, such a beautiful child. I am so sorry for all the continued pain this must bring on. Thinking of you today and always.
God bless,
Michelle
Michelle Rice <michelle.rice@gpmlaw.com>
Forest Lake, MN - Thursday, January 6, 2005 1:29 PM CST
I love you Monica and am continually thinking of and praying for you and your whole family. I still have your number. I will call you sometime just to say hi, but I wanted to leave a note here letting you know that I'm thinking of you all the time and that you are loved. Blessings in Christ.
Khalita <khalita@hecaresonline.org>
Lexington, NC - Thursday, January 6, 2005 10:29 AM CST
Monica-
When I saw that picture I just thought, "ooohh". It just rips my heart out. However, knowing she is with Jesus, makes me feel a bit better. It's just that no child should suffer like that, and how hard she fought is just amazing. She had incredible strength and I know she got that from you, her family. She has touched me in so many ways. . . She is one I truly admire.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
GAYLORD, MN USA - Wednesday, January 5, 2005 4:07 PM CST
Thnking of you always and always thankful for the Gift of Gabbie ... she has taught me SO much and I never met her ... Thanks to her I llok forward to being reunited with all of those that have gone before us ... her photo is heart-breaking but to realize the Ultimate Gift she received in the end makes it easier to look at ... THANK YOU Gabbie for teaching me so much ... THANK YOU Monica for sharing your daughter with us!
God Bless ~ Rebekah
Rebekah Clark <mommy_jaden@yahoo.com>
Prior Lake, MN USA - Wednesday, January 5, 2005 1:00 PM CST
Hello dear friend - when I first came to Gabbie's site today, I was so saddened at the picture; but after reading your journal entry, I was inspired. Your faith always shines brightly, Monica. And that is what really matters and what sustains all of us.
We have survived more biopsies on Aaron's back. There are scars, but thanks be to God, all is well with some extra skin taken to assure clean margins.
Love, Kathy
Kathy Welch <abbysmamaa@yahoo.com>
Lexington, Ohio - Wednesday, January 5, 2005 12:16 AM CST
Monica, the photo of Gabbie is heart-wrenching. I can't stop the tears. My mother-heart weeps for you. I know if it were Emily in that picture I would feel like my insides were being torn out. Gabbie carried her cross with dignity and is now in God's grace. You continue to carry your cross with dignity and amazing strength. May God continue to bless and keep you until you can join her.
Amy Grein <amy@tailoredtreasures.com>
Eden Prairie, MN - Wednesday, January 5, 2005 9:23 AM CST
Hi Monica! Wow - the tears flowed seeing that picture. No child should have to suffer the way Gabbie and all the others have and still are! I am glad, though, that you received the gift of the pictures. How surprised you must have been to open that pack and see Gabbie looking back at you! My heart aches for you and your family on your journey back to Gabbie. Keep your admirable faith strong!
Jenn Hartley <ronjenn696@prodigy.net>
Bensalem, PA USA - Wednesday, January 5, 2005 8:29 AM CST
Hi Monica,
You are so right--Gabbie carried her cross with so much Grace--more than any words can ever express.
She is indeed so very, very special.
With Love-- and a heavy heart for your unimaginable grief,
Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Tuesday, January 4, 2005 11:00 PM CST
Dear Monica, John, Aubrey, Saint Gabrielle, and Noah,
The LORD is always faithful! You are the angels God sent to us when we are in need. The first Christmas and New Year without Esther is really tough for us. Thank you for prayer and encouraging words, they came just in time :) Gabrielle is so precious. Yes, you are right. When we reunion with our kids, the joy will endure forever.
Your family will continue in our prayer with love.
Benjamin, Paulina, Erin (Forever Family with ~Esther~) <Mercy2Live@yahoo.com>
Fairborn, OH US - Tuesday, January 4, 2005 10:23 PM CST
Monica,
What a gift to have developed a surprise role of film, although it must have been very bittersweet given the pictures were from PICU. That must have been very emotional looking at them. Thank you for the reminder that no matter how heavy our cross seems, Jesus carried a much heavier cross when He took on the sins of all mankind. Remembering Gabbie and the silent suffering she endured. Looking forward to seeing you on Saturday.
Love,
Jen Buckentine
Zachary's Site <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Tuesday, January 4, 2005 9:23 PM CST
Monica,
The picture of Gabbie is so heartbreaking. Why your precious baby ever had to go through such suffering I will never understand. Why any child has to endure such diseases and treatments in incomprensible to me. I know by the time our questions can be answered, we will not care anymore, because we will be in such awe, adoration and worship of our Lord in heaven. It just makes no earthly sense to see such suffering of a child. Even in her suffering she is so beautiful. She touches me so. I thank God for the surprise gift of film, but I am sorry that at the same time it is so difficult to see the PICU pictures. Praying for you today as always.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
- Tuesday, January 4, 2005 5:28 PM CST
Hi Monica,
Thinking of you and Gabbie everyday.
My heart is always with you.
I hope and pray you will be able to enjoy many happy things in 2005--even though it has to be without your precious little Gabbie and her beautiful sweet blue eyes..
I think of her several times each day--like she is not that far away--it is hard to explain. But I think of her beautiful and loving soul often. It is a comforting feeling.
Love and Prayers Always,
Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Sunday, January 2, 2005 8:57 PM CST
Dear Monica,
Thank you for the e-mails lately, I truly did appreciate them. I am so sorry to read that you have encountered credit card fraud. I am praying that you will be able to get it all cleared up and are protected from having to pay for other's fraudulent behavior. Your statement about the tossed aside stuffed animals and the statement made about the dead tsunami children brought tears to my eyes. I am so sorry that Gabbie had to suffer and that you continue to suffer each and everyday because she is not here to touch and see. I know you hold her in your heart, but that can never be the same as having her here in a physical being. I am thankful that you know of the free gift of salvation, so that you will one day be reunited with Gabbie, and what a day that will be! God bless always.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, Mo - Sunday, January 2, 2005 4:03 PM CST
Just stopping by to wish you and your family peace, strength, happiness, and many blessings in the New Year. God Bless!
Laura, Ken, Nathan, & ^^Angel Jillian^^ http://www2.caringbridge.org/fl/jillian/
Naples, FL - Sunday, January 2, 2005 3:13 PM CST
Dear Monica,
Praying 2005 brings you peace and happiness.
Love,
Andrea
Andrea Passarella <andrea@passarella.com>
NJ - Friday, December 31, 2004 11:36 PM CST
Wishing your Family a Happy & Healthy New Year!!
Always remembering your precious Gabbie!!
Lots of Hugs to you all!
Love,
Sheryl
Sheryl Gunzenhauser <mik181@mchsi.com>
Winnebago, MN - Friday, December 31, 2004 6:38 PM CST
Hey Monica-
Thank you. You certainly didn't have to do that, although I really appreciate it! :0)
Monica- I truly thank you for all that you do. You are an amazing woman.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
GAYLORD, MN USA - Friday, December 31, 2004 10:39 AM CST
Hi Monica,
Wishing you and your family a Happy, Healthy, Prosperous New Year 2005. May God bless you and your family.
Denise and kids, Shawn and Zach
Denise Poquette <onlypookie@yahoo.com>
Clearwater, FL - Friday, December 31, 2004 5:38 AM CST
Hey Monica
Just checking in and wanted to say hi. Things have been a bit hectic lately as my uncle has been in the hospital fighting for his life. He also has a website: www.caringbridge.org/mn/kuphal.
I'm so sorry to hear about your credit card fraud. I had a scary thing happen when I was on Ebay and I submitted all of my info on there and happened to switch 2 numbers around, so I don't think anything happened. Although, I had to notify all of the credit bureaus and file a police report, etc. It was awful. I had gotten an email from what looked like Ebay, only it was a fraud one. It was a mess. Hopefully you can get it all straightened out. At least you caught it early.
Although I think about you daily, I have thought more about you during the holiday season. May God wrap his arms around you and your family and give you comfort.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
GAYLORD, MN USA - Thursday, December 30, 2004 12:02 AM CST
Hi Monica,
I was sorry to hear about the credit card fraud you experienced. My goodness. I am glad you became aware of it however.
Thinking of you always and keeping you in my constant prayers. Saint Gabbie is *always* in my heart. She is loved very much, even by strangers who have never met her. She is very, very special. And very precious.
My continued prayers to you and your family.
God Bless You.
With Love,
Vic and Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Wednesday, December 29, 2004 10:07 PM CST
Monica,
What a gift to find the candle burning in Gabbie's memory...lighting the way to Christ for all of us. The picture of Aubrey and Gabbie is so touching, both girls exposed to way too much at too early of an age. Sin can be so ugly, but the love of Christ shines through both of their eyes telling us that He has won and not satan!
Love and Merry octave of Christmas to you,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <WeLoveTeesa@earthlink.net, www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose>
St. Paul, MN United States - Tuesday, December 28, 2004 2:24 PM CST
Hi Monica,
I'm happy to see your post-Christmas journal entry as my thoughts were with you over the holiday. I too carried an especially heavy heart this season due to all the sadness and loss in this world. My heart simply aches for those precious children who are suffering or have died and for their parents. Like you've said many times, it's incredible that such pain and devastation is allowed. I often wonder if awe how those afflicted survive when I can barely survive and am so far removed.
Continue to hang on tight to our Lord, Monica...1/1/05 is ever so near...and each day brings us all closer to where we really want to be.
Many blessings to you,
Amy
P.S. Thank you so very much for the incredibly beautiful card you made. I recognized the cover immediately from your website. It's beauty, and your words, touched my heart. I couldn't be more pleased that you are enjoying your gift in Gabbie's honor.
Amy Grein <amy@tailoredtreasures.com>
Eden Prairie, MN 55347 - Tuesday, December 28, 2004 9:15 AM CST
Keeping you close in my heart...and remembering you in prayer during the holidays...and always. God bless you.
Love, Michelle Espeseth
Clear Lake, WI - Sunday, December 26, 2004 7:21 AM CST
Monica,
Thank you for your friendship. We know and feel your pain, this day and every day. Our babies are together, celebrating Christmas in all the wonder and joy of Heaven, of that I am certain. Wishing peace for all of us.....
Love, hugs and prayers,
Rhonda and Eddie, Forever Connor's Mommy and Daddy <rshunley@comcast.net>
Hendersonville, TN USA - Saturday, December 25, 2004 9:29 AM CST
A PRAYER FOR CHRISTMAS
God Give Us eyes this Christmas
To see the Christmas Star.
And give us ears to hear the song
of angels from afar
And, with our eyes and ears attuned
for a message from above,
Let "Christmas Angels" speak to us
of hope and faith and love
Hope to light our pathway
When the way ahead is dark,
Hope to sing through stormy days,
with the sweetness of the lark
Faith to trust in things unseen
and know beyond all seeing
That it is in our Fathers love
We live and have our being
And love to break down barriers
of color, race and creed,
Love to see and understand
and help all those in need.
Lord, bless those we love this Christmas Day,be they near or far away Bless those good friends who mean so much and those with whom we're out of touch. We bring them all to You in prayer, and ask You to keep them in Your care.
Please know that you are thought of, in a very special way, not just this beautiful season but every day.
Chris Ullrich - Bella's Grammy <c_ullrich@msn.com, caringbridge.com/page/isabellaledesma>
- Friday, December 24, 2004 10:56 PM CST
Thinking of you often...Gabbie is always remembered in our prayers.
Love,
Natalie Martin-Rak (caringbridge.com/fl/lina) <natalie@Dentxllc.com>
Jacksonville,, fl - Friday, December 24, 2004 9:22 PM CST
It's been a long time, but I have thought about Gabbie's site often. We are at long last back on-line, so I wanted to drop in and say I've missed your updates Monica. I know the holidays are difficult for you, so I wanted to wish you much peace and much joy for not only you, but John, Aubrey and Noah. He's coming back for us all soon, hallelujah! God bless!
Christy <calee59@wi.rr.com>
South Milwaukee, WI - Friday, December 24, 2004 4:19 PM CST
Monica, John and family,
I love the card you made, you have a great talent! I know you are missing Gabbie very much. Your family is in our prayers over this holiday season and every day. Wishing you a very blessed Christmas.
In Christ's Love,
Jen, Bill, Brady and Saint Zachary Buckentine
Zachary's Site <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Friday, December 24, 2004 9:42 AM CST
Wishing you a very merry Christmas!
Hugs,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Friday, December 24, 2004 8:05 AM CST
Dear Monica,
Wishing you a very Merry Christmas. Gabbie has touched my life more than you'll ever know and her memory lives on. I hope the holiday goes by quickly for you. I am so sorry for your pain. Stay warm.
God bless,
Michelle
Michelle Rice <michelle.rice@gpmlaw.com>
Forest Lake, MN - Thursday, December 23, 2004 3:44 PM CST
Dear Monica and family;
Merry Christmas... May your hearts be filled with peace, love and joy BECAUSE of our Saviour's saving grace. We love you
Monte and Ivy Ervin <ivymeadows@earthlink.net http://www.caringbridge.org/oh/lukeervin>
Mansfield, Ohio - Wednesday, December 22, 2004 8:38 PM CST
I wanted to let you know that I am thinking of all of you (extended family too) this holiday season. I'm sure everyone feels Gabbie's absence and misses her. Your entry about the "mother's voice" really made me think. I'm going to use my mother's voice a little more often than I have in the past. Don't beat yourself up about what you didn't do...be happy for what you did do. Gabbie was no stranger to God when she got to Heaven, that was because of you and John.
Rhonda Meyer <rschultz@scl.doc.state.mn.us>
- Wednesday, December 22, 2004 2:57 PM CST
Monica,
Christmas blessings to your family! We pray for peace and an out-pouring of God's grace on you in this new year...yet another without your beautiful Gabbie.
Much love,
Cathy & st. Theresa Rose
cathy clyde <WeLoveTeesa@earthlink.net, www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose>
St. Paul, MN United States - Wednesday, December 22, 2004 1:32 PM CST
Dear Paquette family,
Wishing you a Merry Christmas and a happy and healthy New Year!
Bernadette Cassidy <Bernadette.Cassidy@us.ing.com>
Minneapolis, Mn USA - Wednesday, December 22, 2004 11:15 AM CST
Hello Monica and Family!!
What nice pictures!! Aubrey looks so much bigger than your last picture of her and Gabbie. Kids grow up so fast! And Noah, what a head of hair! Don't feel bad, we didn't get Alex's hair cut until he was 18 months old... he had such beautiful dark red hair & it was curly on the bottom and oh, so long on top! We couldn't bear to cut the curls, but we did and now his hair is light red/orange!
Best wishes to you and your family and wishing you a Kind, Gentle Christmas and A Happy Healthy New Year!
Jenn Hartley <ronjenn696@prodigy.net>
Bensalem, PA USA - Wednesday, December 22, 2004 9:55 AM CST
Still thinking of you ... Still forever grateful that Gabbie showed me the Lord ... THANK YOU Monica ... THANK YOU Gabbie ... THANK YOU Lord ...
Rebekah Clark <mommy_jaden@yahoo.com>
Prior Lake, MN USA - Monday, December 20, 2004 3:03 PM CST
Dear Monica,
Thinking of you during this difficult holiday season. I know you are sad without Gabbie but I am sure there is joy with Aubrey and Noah and their delight in all that Christmas brings. Hopefully that will help with your sorrow.
Another family will be filled with sorrow eternally, Hayley's.......she passed away last night after a very brave fight. It's so hard to loose a child, to plan a funeral 5 days before Christmas would be horrendous. Please pray for her family.
http://www.caringbridge.com/ga/hayley
God Bless,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Monday, December 20, 2004 8:11 AM CST
Hi Monica,
Just wanted to say Hello. Thinking of your family and dear sweet Gabbie always. I can't even begin to imagine how much you miss her every single day.
You guys are in my heart and prayers every day..
Love in Him,
Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Sunday, December 19, 2004 8:36 PM CST
Monica-
Thank you for visiting Samuel's page. I'm so sorry for all of us, and all of this pain. We do have hope in the next life - where our babies are waiting - but this life can be so hard. I love Gabbie's sweet little smile in the picture.
Sending love and prayers.
Kelly, Samuel J's mama
http://www.caringbridge.org/pa/samuelj
Kelly Johnson <kellyjnsn@msn.com>
Pittsburgh, PA - Saturday, December 18, 2004 8:40 AM CST
Hi Monica,
Just stopping as I always do each day. Sending good thoughts your way and remembering Gabbie.
I hope that any guestbook signers who have time will stop by the Scott household. Little Allie lost her battle with AML in September at almost 9 months of age. Today would have been her first birthday. She was their only child. Please send her parents good thoughts if you have time.
http://www.scotthousehold.com
Monica - your reality is so difficult. I wish I could say something to make it better or easier but I know I can't.
I think of you often!
Hugs,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Friday, December 17, 2004 7:06 AM CST
Just letting you know I stopped by.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
GAYLORD, MN USA - Thursday, December 16, 2004 1:59 PM CST
I just wanted to let you know that I have not forgotten you. I cannot sign in as much as I want to, but I do lift you up to the Lord in prayer. I'm sure this holiday time must be at least as hard as the rest of the year if not more so. Please know that I care and that you are loved. I will be back to check on you again soon.
Khalita My Caringbridge Site <khalita@hecaresonline.org>
Lexington, NC - Wednesday, December 15, 2004 3:50 PM CST
Monica,
Hello my dear friend... Once again I am deeply touched by your honesty, your awareness and compassion. The journal entry a few days ago about you finding your "mommy voice" for Gabbie was soooo well illustrated. My heart broke for you, for the guilt you are holding over it. Turn it over to Jesus- He has the power to grant you peace through forgiveness about it. You are a wonderful mother, and I am sooooo blessed to have you to talk with, share with and just "be". Sending big bear hugs to all of you this Christmas season....
With love, Ivy and Monte Ervin <ivymeadows@earthlink.net http://www.caringbridge.org/oh/lukeervin>
Mansfield, Ohio - Tuesday, December 14, 2004 8:40 PM CST
Hey Monica-
Just checking in. I'm thinking about you even more during this holiday season.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
GAYLORD, MN USA - Tuesday, December 14, 2004 10:22 AM CST
Monica,
And what a bold and courageous mother's voice you have. Sorrow and the cross have strengthened you in ways only possible through suffering. God bless you as you continue to get up and live each day w/o Gabbie, that truly is a victory in itself. You defeat satan each time you offer up your pain to Our Savior and live for His will! God bless you and know of our prayers...
much love,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Sunday, December 12, 2004 8:30 PM CST
I just wanted to let you know that you are very much in my thoughts and prayers during what I know is a difficult time. I can't imagine how you feel, but I can be your friend and I hope you know that I'm here if there's ever anything I can do. Blessings and love in Christ.
Khalita My Caringbridge Site <khalita@hecaresonline.org>
Lexington, NC - Sunday, December 12, 2004 6:02 PM CST
Hi Monica, I just dropped by to let you know that I'll try and send you a $5 off coupon for the calendars. I know you said you were interested in one in Steve's guestbook. Every time I send out a free gift, I am able to send some coupons to people I know so I'll make sure you get one with the next item I send out.
I hope you have a lovely Xmas, filled with happy memories of your beautiful Gabbie.
HelenH <geordielass999@hotmail.com>
2005 CHILDREN'S CANCER RECOGNITION CALENDAR - $5 FROM EACH SALE BENEFITS CARINGBRIDGE FAMILIES!, - Sunday, December 12, 2004 4:00 AM CST
DEAR MONICA, I love to read your journal entries, they are such wonderful words of wisdom. Gabbie was such a lucky little girl to have you for a Mommy. Love that picture of Gabbie and her Daddy. You are special to Jesus and you are special to me. Much love and many hugs from Ohio, Barb (mom to Heidi & Debbie)
www.caringbridge.org/oh/debbie
www.caringbridge.org/oh/heidl "become an organ donor . . . give your heart to Jesus"
Barb <babogner@earthlink.net>
Mansfield, OHIO USA - Friday, December 10, 2004 3:36 PM CST
Monica,
I know when you think back on things and know you would have done things differently at the time if you had only known what was to be. "Mother's guilt" is very hard and so much harder when you have a child in heaven. We all live and learn. I probably would have done the same thing you did but now I wouldn't. You have to remember the state you were in at the time, having a baby, not having her near you for days.....your emotions I imagine were all over the place. So forgive yourself and go on. It's all you can do.
I find myself talking about Gabbie all the time with whoever will listen. Unfortunately my experiences with miscarriage (yours too) and your loss of Gabbie have made me very sensitive to those who have lost a child regardless of when. That loss always needs to be acknowledged. Pretending that child never existed is much worse than saying something about them and remembering them. I thought that was what you meant about "denying" her.
I hope this makes sense. I do firmly believe in forgiving yourself even though I know that task would be a little easier if Gabbie were here.
Thinking of you often!!
Sending hugs your way!
God Bless,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Friday, December 10, 2004 6:02 AM CST
Monica,
All of us grow and mature with time, age and experience. I am much more a defender of my children than I was when I was a young mother. It is normal to become more outspoken as life progresses. I know you feel you let a stranger speak for your child, but you were also probably using your judgement with the people you were dealing with. Situations with family members, especially early on in a marriage can be extremely difficult to confront. More than likely, if you had said something you would have been criticized by them. Yes, it would have been better to speak in your child's behalf, but you were younger and weaker. It was who you were at the time and life and it's trials have strengthened you to be who you are today, a wonderful loving person. Take care.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
- Thursday, December 9, 2004 10:41 PM CST
Hi Monica and John:
The picture of Aubrey and Noah is wonderful - they are really getting big (and you said that's not even a recent one.) And the photos of Gabbie...her eyes are always so incredible. I just want to say hello and tell you that we have not forgotten you or your precious girl, and never will, even though you rarely hear from us. Thinking of you and praying for you. God's blessings,
Christine and Barry Hay <barryhay@comcast.net>
Corcoran, MN - Thursday, December 9, 2004 10:09 PM CST
Dear Monica,
As I was driving to work yesterday I was listening to the radio. There was a man on doing an interview that was asked how many children he had. He answered, "I have seven children, 1 in heaven and 6 that I am raising." I immediately thought of your entry from the day before about having to deny Gabbie. I am not sure in what ways you feel you have to deny Gabbie, but I thought that his answer was wonderful. He said it as if he had said it a thousand times, with calm reserve and conviction. I thought it was wonderful that he was not going to allow the world to deny that his child be counted in his statement of how many children he had. The interviewer seemed very at ease with his answer. She did not quiz him about the one that had gone to heaven, but I believe if she had desired to, she would have felt comfortable doing so. Just thought I'd tell you that had happened. It was so close to your journal entry that I felt God had me turn to that radio station and listen. There was another journal entry from someone on a Caringbridge site the other day that was so helpful with my mother and I do not remember where I read it. My mother and I were going shopping on Monday and she said that she felt she was over grieving for my father who died unexpectedly 4 years ago. I told her about reading on a Caringbridge site about you are never over grieving for someone as dear as a spouse, parent or child, you just become more proficient at masking the grief. She immediately seemed relieved by that response and said that is exactly what you do. I think it gave her comfort to know that I was acknowledging even though she seemed fine and happy and going on with life, she will never stop grieving her husband of 53 years. Thanks for letting me share, just felt like telling you these things. God bless you always.
I am thankful that Noah is okay. I am sure John was in a panic.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
- Thursday, December 9, 2004 10:18 AM CST
I love you monica and am praying for you guys. Keep in touch as you can and I will keep checking on you here. HUGS!
Khalita My Caringbridge Site <khalita@hecaresonline.org>
Lexington, NC - Wednesday, December 8, 2004 10:11 PM CST
Hi Monica-
Just letting you know that I stopped by.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
GAYLORD, MN USA - Wednesday, December 8, 2004 12:52 AM CST
Dear Monica,
You should never have to deny anything that has to do with Gabbie. People want to stay in their own comfort zone and that means not talking about a child that has passed. I'm sick of it! I guess I find it so bothersome because I spend an awful lot of time being a caringbridge "ambassador" and I'm sorry but there are a lot of kids that die from all kinds of cancers every day.
Their parents and siblings (other family too) still remember them no matter how many years have passed. The death of a child is something no parent should have to go through and I believe a defining moment in that person's life. They will never, ever get over it; they just learn to live with it the best that they can.
Sorry to ramble on but your post today hit me. I'm sure it's because I know of another little girl that is very, very close to the end.
http://www2.caringbridge.org/ga/hayley/
Please offer them up in prayer and remember even if a child is gone from this earth, they are always so very, very close to their parents hearts.
Hugs,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Tuesday, December 7, 2004 6:12 AM CST
Monica,
It truly breaks my heart that you would be expected to deny Gabbie by others because of their lack of compassion. You have taught me so much. Thank you for blessing me with insight that I would not have had otherwise. Praying for you always.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
- Monday, December 6, 2004 6:19 PM CST
Monica,
What an intense passage you posted from!! I totally agree, and that says it quite well. Praying for your peace this holiday season.... Love, Ivy
Ivy Ervin ***forever missing Lukie*** <ivymeadows@earthlink.net http://www.caringbridge.org/oh/lukeervin>
Mansfield, OH - Monday, December 6, 2004 8:27 AM CST
Dear Monica,
Just stopping by and praying for you and your family. Remembering Gabbie, her beautiful blue eyes and her solemn tears.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Monday, December 6, 2004 8:20 AM CST
Wishing you a blessed Christmas!
Love, Eileen
www.caringbridge.org/il/ej
EJ's Caring Place
- Monday, December 6, 2004 1:48 AM CST
Hi Monica,
The picture of Daddy and Gabbie is precious. Thank you for sharing it.
I can't imagine the pain of the holidays without Gabbie.
It breaks my heart more than I can say.
Thinking of you and praying so much for you always.
My love and support,
Sara
www.caringbridge.com/mn/danielhammer <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Friday, December 3, 2004 9:31 PM CST
Monica, John and family,
Just stopping by to let you know that I'm thinking of you! Monica, so sorry I never answered your question. I love Jars of Clay music! Some is similar to "The Valley Song" and some is a little more upbeat. I would recommend the 2-disc album - Furthermore:From the Studio/From the Stage. Hope you don't mind that I left this in the guestbook.
Have a blessed weekend.
Love,
Jen
Jen Buckentine <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Friday, December 3, 2004 12:46 AM CST
Hi Monica-
Just letting you know I stopped by.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
GAYLORD, MN USA - Friday, December 3, 2004 9:12 AM CST
Hi Monica,
Thank you for signing Adrienne's guestbook. Of course I remember you. When Yolanda sent that email a couple of weeks ago, I noted the names on there. She spoke of missing our daughters: Adrienne, Anna, Gabbie, Leilani and others. I try to focus on praying for you all so that I don't become so despondent thinking of Adrienne.
A stranger spoke to me in Wal-Mart this evening and wished me a merry Christmas. I wished him one in return though I felt no need to share with him why mine will not nor ever be as merry as Christmases past. Even a few years ago when we were upset because we could not give our children as many gifts as they were used to and that we would like to, that Christmas was much more merry than any to come.
Nevertheless I am thankful that, while our families are not complete, our daughters are safe in the arms of Jesus. I was just listening to a song with those words the other day:
There is a place
I long to be
In my Savior's embrace
Where I am free from life's care
There is rest and sweet communion
Jesus has all I need
For in His presence there is
Fullness of joy
And at His right hand are pleasures forever more
There is no place I'd rather be
Than in the arms of Jesus my King -- written by Alvin Fruga
I have to believe that even if our daughters had a choice to come back, being with Jesus has to be more satisfying than anything this earth could hold. His arms must be much more comforting than mine. They have to be for I long to be embraced by them myself.
I pray for your peace during this season. Please keep in touch. I love to hear from you.
Blessings,
Nichelle
Adrienne's Mom, http://www.caringbridge.org/tx/adrienne <rejoice_first_lady@yahoo.com>
Cedar Park, TX USA - Wednesday, December 1, 2004 10:11 PM CST
Monica,
Thinking of you always.
Carl Robinson was a very dear friend of ours. We will be going to the funeral on Wed. I grieve so much for his wonderful parents. Like you and John, they have a beautiful heart, spirit and faith. And sadly they now also share this tremendous loss of their beautiful baby.
His website is www.caringbridge.com/mn/carcar
You also may remember him from the local tv news this past summer as he and his family had a lemonade stand at the Twins game in honor of Alex Scott.
Also, I'm very sorry to say that another precious child lost his battle with this same disease that took Gabbie and Carl. Jack Thorne also passed way today. Although I did not know them personally my heart is bleeding for them too. He was diagnosed a month before Daniel and relapsed this July.
Like Carl, Jack also has a website, although not updated. I have kept up with them through the NB listserve.
I know you will join me in keeping Carl and Jack's families in your prayers. How I wish it was not this way for you and for these families. It permanently pains my heart deeply when I hear of parents losing their child. Their grief breaks my heart to pieces.
I just pray for them daily and ask the Lord to help them.
Thanks for all your caring and prayers for so many others when you are grieivng yourself for your very precious (and beautiful) Saint Gabrielle.
God Bless You!
My Love,
Sara
www.caringbridge.com/mn/danielhammer <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Monday, November 29, 2004 10:33 PM CST
Dear Paquettes,
Just want you to know that we are thinking of you and especially about Gabbie. We will never forget her.
Love from the Nielsens
Nielsen
Minneapolis, MN USA - Monday, November 29, 2004 2:30 PM CST
Dearest Paquettes,
It is my hope that Thanksgiving was bearable for you. I know it is difficult without Gabbie.
I know the upcoming holidays are going to be so hard. I hope you find joy in celebrating the birth of Jesus and the magic of Christmas in children's eyes.
If you have time, please sign the book of Carl Robinson. He passed away on Friday from neuroblastoma.
http://www.caringbridge.com/mn/carcar
Take care!
God Bless!
Hugs,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Monday, November 29, 2004 6:58 AM CST
Dear Monica, what a treat it was in June to meet you, to finally meet you after all this time and so many emails. I continue to pray for you even though it's been almost five years. May the peace of Christ come to you and John and your children, even though it is a very difficult time, love, toni
Toni
CA - Sunday, November 28, 2004 4:59 PM CST
Monic,
I am continuing to pray for you. I know the holidays are very difficult for those who are missing their children here on earth.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
- Friday, November 26, 2004 11:51 PM CST
Thinking of you all today. There is no doubt in my mind that our children are together, celebrating in Heaven, on this Thanksgiving Day. The pain of those of us left behind, though, is just as intense today, and it is EVERY day.
Thank you for your friendship.
Love and hugs,
Rhonda and Eddie, Forever Connor's Mommy and Daddy
<rshunley@comcast.net>
Hendersonville, TN God Bless America! - Thursday, November 25, 2004 8:24 AM CST
BLESSED THANKSGIVING!
Dear Monica, John, and Children,
I am thinking of you, on Gabrielle's third Thanksgiving in Heaven. Oh, what joy she must be experiencing! Even so, it is a bittersweet time for the four of you, so you are in my thoughts and prayers.
I am including a Thanksgiving litany, which is my favorite Thanksgiving prayer. We often use it, at table, on Thanksgiving, and it is always used in our church at this time. Perhaps you can use it sometime this weekend, as well.
God bless you all! I am praying for each one of Gabrielle's loved ones and for the families of Connor Hunley, Justin Rhodes, Cheyenne Fiveash, Ian Davideit, and other youngsters, who died recently. I am also praying for better medical care and cures in the area of childhood cancer.
Grace, peace, and love,
~Colette~
A Litany of Thanksgiving
Let us give thanks to God our Father for all his gifts so freely bestowed upon us.
V For the beauty and wonder of your creation, in earth and sky and see,
R We thank you, Lord.
V For all that is gracious in the lives of men and women, revealing the image of Christ,
R We thank you, Lord.
V For our daily food and drink, our homes and families, and our friends,
R We thank you, Lord.
V For minds to think and hearts to love and hands to serve,
R We thank you, Lord.
V For health and strength to work, and leisure to rest and play,
R We thank you, Lord.
V For the brave and courageous, who are patient in suffering and faithful in adversity,
R We thank you, Lord.
V For all valiant seekers after truth, liberty and justice,
R We thank you, Lord.
V For the communion of saints, in all times and places,
R We thank you, Lord.
V Above all, we thank you for the great mercies and promises given to us in Christ Jesus our Lord;
R To him be praise and glory, with you, O Father, and the Holy Spirit, now and for ever. Amen.
~The Book of Common Prayer, Page 837
Gratefully. Faithfully. Peacefully.
Colette
Clifton Park (near Albany), NY U.S.A. - Thursday, November 25, 2004 1:36 AM CST
Dear Monica,
Thinking of you and praying for you this week. I'm sorry for yet another holiday spent without Gabbie. I hope you have an enjoyable Thanksgiving and have Friday off of work. I am thankful this year for getting to know you.
God bless,
Michelle
Michelle Rice <michelle.rice@gpmlaw.com>
Forest Lake, MN - Wednesday, November 24, 2004 3:34 PM CST
Monica,
Thank you for your lovely friendship and fun visit last week...I am so blessed. During this Thanksgiving week, we give thanks for the precious life of Gabbie and are grateful to God for her too-short-life. God bless you as you go through another holiday without her in your arms.
Love,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose, weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Wednesday, November 24, 2004 11:30 AM CST
Monica, I so wanted to sign the guestbook on Gabbie's birthday but just didn't know what to say. Unlike the children we have on earth, your baby is in Heaven. I'm sure even though you know she is in a better place, it's hard to think about life without her...what could have been. Although you can be happy that many of us have been touched by your faith journey, you wouldn't be human if a part of you didn't feel "but why my baby?" There is only One that can answer that question for you and I know that some day you will know and you will be together with her again. As always, I am thinking of you and your family.
Rhonda Meyer <rschultz@scl.doc.state.mn.us>
- Tuesday, November 23, 2004 12:24 AM CST
Dear, Dear Monica... just the beginning of a very difficult season. I'm right there with ya, my friend. I am sending you hugs from afar. I'll be standing in the gap for you(extra hard) for the next six weeks or so. God bless
jan livingstone (Andy's Mom forever)
- Tuesday, November 23, 2004 9:39 AM CST
Dear Monica,
Your journal today just broke my heart..
The emptyness is unimaginable.
I am so sorry..
I am so sorry your Gabbie is not here with you on earth where she should be.
My heart is always grieving for you.
She is in Jesus's arms but you miss her terribly.
Thinking of you with hugs and prayers..wishing with all my heart that things were different...
In Christ,
Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Tuesday, November 23, 2004 0:32 AM CST
Dear Monica,
I am sorry that it has been even more difficult for you lately without your precious Gabbie. I am praying for you. Gabbie, you have touched so many of us, you will always be a blessing to many, never to be forgotten.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, - Sunday, November 21, 2004 7:42 PM CST
Monica I wanted to send a card on Monday when I was thinking of it but wasnt sure if the address I found online was yours. There are a LOT of Paquettes in your state! And then I let it slip my mind and forgot until yesterday. I'm sorry, I know you dont have the luxury of forgetting your sorrow and grief. Happy Birthday Gabby.
Chris ~ Gooch's Site ~
- Thursday, November 18, 2004 6:29 PM CST
I contemplated about your entry about Gabbie's prayers. "We prayed for her but... it was about HER prayers..." Well, this is my thought. It wasn't her prayers, SHE WAS THE PRAYER. and still is. Then I thought about a human being a prayer. Would that make her a sacrifice? No, because Jesus was the sacrifice. Rather, she was and is the gift. So are you.
Happy birthday little girl. Have cake & party at the beach. We should be so blessed.
Dianne Goings <dianneg@integraonline.com>
Prior Lake, mn - Thursday, November 18, 2004 11:54 AM CST
Thinking of Gabbie today on her birthday. I know that every day is a happy day for your precious daughter now with Jesus. But that doesn't make the pain any less real for you, her family, left here. Thinking about all of you today on what would have been Gabbie's 5th Birthday. Wishing you could be celebrating it with her...knowing that someday you will celebrate with her when you meet her again on the streets of Heaven.
Love and God bless,
Jen, Bill, Brady and Saint Zachary Buckentine
Zachary's Site <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Wednesday, November 17, 2004 9:03 PM CST
Thinking of you on Gabbie's 5th birthday. God Bless.
Cathy Rossini <trossini@comcast.net>
IGH, MN - Wednesday, November 17, 2004 8:13 PM CST
Just wanting you to know that you are very dear to me as a friend. I am so sorry for the pain you have to endure until you are able to see Gabbie again forever. Know that you are loved very much and I am praying for you always. I'm here if you need me. Blessings in Christ.
Khalita My Caringbridge Site Duke Peds BMT Aplastic Anemia <khalita@hecaresonline.org>
Lexington, NC - Wednesday, November 17, 2004 8:11 PM CST
Dearest Monica,
Oh, how I wish that Gabbie was here to celebrate her fifth birthday with her family that loved her so much. Even though many would love her to still be here on earth, no one that truly loves her would wish her back to this sinful world we live in. I am remembering all of Gabbie's family today and praying for them.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Wednesday, November 17, 2004 7:19 PM CST
Holding you very close in my heart, on what I'm sure is a difficult day for you. God bless! with Christian love,
jan livingstone (Andy's Mom forever)
- Wednesday, November 17, 2004 6:54 PM CST
Happy Birthday to a sweet little girl who changed my life and we've never even met! I will be dere someday to tell you all about it.
Sue Kirtz <skirtz@lmnc.org>
Apple Valley, MN - Wednesday, November 17, 2004 6:42 PM CST
Gabbie~ always remembering, never forgetting, especially
on this very special day. You are so very missed by so many.
Monica, John, Aubrey and Noah- you guys are always in my thoughts and prayers. And yes, we will be dere!
Jill & Family
- Wednesday, November 17, 2004 6:22 PM CST
Monica- Thinking of you and your family today.
GABBIE- HAPPY 5TH BIRTHDAY!!! YOU ARE SO LOVED AND MISSED BY ALL SO VERY VERY MUCH. THINKING OF YOU EVERY DAY, UNTIL THE DAY I AM BLESSED TO FINALLY MEET "YOU DERE"....SEND YOUR MOMMY SOME SWEET DREAMS OF YOU:)
LOVE TO ALL OF YOU
KIM
Kimberly Heaton <kimberlyheaton@yahoo.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Wednesday, November 17, 2004 4:21 PM CST
Monica and family:
Thoughts of Gabbie and your family have filled my mind today. Then I looked at the calendar and knew why. Wishing Gabbie could be here to blow out 5 candles on her cake. As always, looking forward to meeting her in Heaven.
Mari Beth Ross <jerryandmaribethross@comcast.net>
Hugo, MN - Wednesday, November 17, 2004 4:09 PM CST
Happy Birthday Sweet Gabbie. I miss you.
Love, Mary
Mary Akagi <b.akagi@worldnet.att.net>
Maple Grove, MN - Wednesday, November 17, 2004 3:19 PM CST
Monica and John,
Still thinking about you..today and every day.
May Jesus wrap his loving arms around you both and hold you tightly..
+Love in Him,
Sara and Vic
www.caringbridge.com/mn/danielhammer <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Wednesday, November 17, 2004 2:46 PM CST
Dear Gabbie: Last weekend, some of your cousins, Aubrey, and Noah gathered at your gravesite to pray, to remember, and to honor your birthday. About a dozen balloons were released into the sky, each one with a note tied to it. The notes were about love and remembrance. We watched the balloons for a long time until the last one disappeared. We knew our thoughts were moving up to heaven.
After that, your cousins and siblings used sidewalk chalk to draw on the road near your grave. They drew pictures of hearts, birthday wishes, and what ever else little children like to draw. We also tried to untangle your wind chimes in the nearby tree but couldn't reach that high. We won't forget to bring a ladder the next time we visit.
But we don't really need to tell you all this because you were there with us. Even though you are gone from our presence we still remember and love you.
Love, Grandma and Grandpa
Jeanine and Jerry Totall <grtotall@aol.com>
Bloomington, MN - Wednesday, November 17, 2004 2:26 PM CST
Thinking of you today and always.
Shannon <hujanenfamily@mcleodusa.net>
Blaine, MN USA - Wednesday, November 17, 2004 1:48 PM CST
John, Monica, Aubrey & Noah...
Thinking of your family and saying an extra little prayer for you all today!
I will make a donation to Caringbridge in memory of Gabbie on her 5th Birthday...
God Bless!!!
Lots of Love & Hugs to you all!!
Chemo Angel Sheryl
Sweet Sweet Gabbie,
HAPPY 5th Birthday!!
Sheryl Gunzenhauser <mik181@mchsi.com>
Winnebago, MN - Wednesday, November 17, 2004 1:26 PM CST
Grieving with you even more today as I remember Gabbie via your wonderful memories. Thank you Jesus for loaning Gabbie to us for those short years and thank you for continuing to let her light shine from heaven. Loving her and loving you all! God bless you on this sorrowful anniversary...
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose, weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Wednesday, November 17, 2004 1:16 PM CST
Extra thoughts and prayers going out to you today
Annie (friends of Allie) <kinseydivine@gmail.com>
TN - Wednesday, November 17, 2004 12:08 AM CST
Keeping you and your family in my thoughts and prayers today.
Happy Birthday Angel Gabbie
Melanie (Friends of Allie)
Augusta, ME USA - Wednesday, November 17, 2004 11:01 AM CST
Remembering Gabbie in our thoughts and prayers today and always. Love Tom, Kari, Joey, Elli, and Nick Totall
Tom Totall <tkjentotall@aol.com>
Edne Prairie, Mn us - Wednesday, November 17, 2004 10:52 AM CST
Remembering Gabbie in our thoughts and prayers today and always. Love Tom, Kari, Joey, Elli, and Nick Totall
Tom Totall <tkjentotall@aol.com>
Edne Prairie, Mn us - Wednesday, November 17, 2004 10:51 AM CST
Just a note to let you know that you are being thought of on this day.
Jenn in Alaska - Friends of Allie
Anchorage, AK USA - Wednesday, November 17, 2004 10:49 AM CST
Prayers are being said for you today. Happy 5th birthday Angel Gabrielle.
Melissa McCarthy (Friends of Allie) <melnjess2002@yahoo.com>
Colorado Springs, CO USA - Wednesday, November 17, 2004 10:46 AM CST
I am so sorry for your loss. My family and I are thinking of you today.
Betsy - Friends of Allie <betsy@cdiweb.com>
Lakewood, CO 80228 - Wednesday, November 17, 2004 10:24 AM CST
Monica, thinking of you and your family on Gabrielle's fifth birthday. God bless.
Robin Boger <Robin.Boger@rbc.com>
Lewisville, NC - Wednesday, November 17, 2004 10:08 AM CST
Monica and family,
My heart is with you today. Birthdays can surely be the hardest.
Remembering your sweet little girl, Ms. Gabrielle.
Love, Michelle Espeseth
Clear Lake, WI - Wednesday, November 17, 2004 8:36 AM CST
Dear Monica,
I woke up thinking about you this morning--realizing a few moments later that today is Gabbie's birthday.
As always, you are close to my heart and in my prayers.
Love,
Andrea
Andrea Passarella <andrea@passarella.com>
NJ - Wednesday, November 17, 2004 8:18 AM CST
My thoughts and prayers continue to be with all of you.
Happy Birthday Gabbie!
Jennifer Miles www.caringbridge.org/mn/deemartinson <jennifer.miles@thomson.com>
Minneapolis, MN USA - Wednesday, November 17, 2004 8:15 AM CST
Happy 5th earthly Birthday beautiful Gabbie ... wishing SO SO much that your presence was here in the flesh ... but as always it is here in emotion and the constant guiding of God ... out thouhts and prayers are always with you Monica, John, Aubrey and Little Noah ... wishing so much things were different ... thanking Gabbie everyday for bringing me to the Lord ...
God Bless ~ Rebekah Clark
Rebekah Clark <mommy_jaden@yahoo.com>
Prior Lake, MN USA - Wednesday, November 17, 2004 8:08 AM CST
Happy 5th Birthday Gabbie. Wishing you were here to celebrate.
Our prayers are with you and your family today, Monica.
God bless,
Michelle
Michelle Rice <michelle.rice@gpmlaw.com>
Forest Lake, MN - Wednesday, November 17, 2004 8:02 AM CST
Remembering beautiful Saint Gabbie on her fifth birthday and thinking of her Mama with love....
Kathy Welch <abbysmamaa@yahoo.com>
Lexington, Ohio - Wednesday, November 17, 2004 7:51 AM CST
Happy 5th Birthday, Gabbie!!
**
May you find comfort in knowing that your precious little one is in the arms of Jesus and may He always give you the strength and comfort that you need.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
GAYLORD, MN USA - Wednesday, November 17, 2004 7:47 AM CST
Happy 5th Birthday, Gabbie!!!!!!!!!!
I pray that you make it through this day even though the pain is excrutiating.
My thoughts and prayers are with you.
Hugs,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, mn - Wednesday, November 17, 2004 6:56 AM CST
Happy 5th Birthday Gabbie!!
Dear Monica and family,
I'm speechless as to what I should write .... thinking of you and holding you in my heart today and everyday... (((((HUGS))))) You're faith is inspirational and I admire your strength. The stamping of the sunbonnet girl is beautiful! Your tributes to your Gabbie are beautiful! I'm sure she's smiling at you and very happy with your love for her. Please take care!
Jenn Hartley <ronjenn696@prodigy.net>
Bensalem, pa - Wednesday, November 17, 2004 6:24 AM CST
For the Paquette Family- Remembering your love, your pain, your joy for your daughter Gabbie. Not just today but everyday. You are an inspiration for us, in your resolute faith, tenacity of hope and perseverance. May God give you mercy and peace in abundance. We love you........
The Ervin Family *** forever missing our Lukie*** <ivymeadows@earthlink.net http:www.caringbridge.org/oh/lukeervin>
Mansfield, Ohio - Tuesday, November 16, 2004 9:23 PM CST
Monica & John,
It has been quite some time since I last wrote to you, even though I check in often, however, I felt compelled to do so for Gabrielle's 5th birthday tomorrow. What would have been Mitchell's 5th birthday is right around the corner on February 3rd. May you continue to find the strength to help you get through tomorrow. I will be thinking about you. Take Care!
Angel Mitchell's Mommy
http://www.geocities.com/hlcmstars1/MitchellFraser.html
Laura Fraser <laura_john_fraser@sympatico.ca>
Bowmanville, Ontario Canada - Tuesday, November 16, 2004 7:27 PM CST
Dearest Gabrielle,
Missing you with your family on your 5th birthday.
Your family misses you more than words can ever say,
and our heart goes out to them more than I can ever say.
Watch over them, precious Gabbie.
They love you bigger than all the oceans of the world.
We remember you today and every day..forever and always.
How could anyone ever forget you, precious child of God?
NO ONE EVER WILL!
Love in Christ,
Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Tuesday, November 16, 2004 7:21 PM CST
Dearest Monica, here I am with tears in my eyes and joy in my heart as I pray for you and yours on the eve of Gabbie's birthday. Surely, our Lord has delivered them from "this present evil" and, wasn't that our prayer all along? Our Lord's grace never ceases to amaze me. We give Him our pain and are dismayed when He doesn't take it away then realize that He has done much better than that! He has matured it. He has allowed it to bear fruit, touch lives and nourish our souls and He continues to temper our sorrow with a growing hope. What a Saviour!
In His Love Forever,
Yolanda
http://www.galatians5.com
Mom to Anna <galatians5@truevine.net>
Altamonte Springs, FL USA - Tuesday, November 16, 2004 11:10 AM CST
Interesting comment on sports. My mother used to say that sports stole family time way back in the 1950's. Now my son says that about his family. You are wise.
Dianne Goings <dianneg@integraonline.com>
Prior Lake, MN - Friday, November 12, 2004 2:08 PM CST
Hi Monica,
Thinking of you and your family and sweet Gabbie.
There is a little girl from Iowa with ALL. It reminded me so much of Gabbie as I was looking at her photos because she enjoys "wagon" rides!
http://www2.caringbridge.org/ia/taylorkrueger/
I pray for you and all the mothers and fathers who have lost their children to cancer.
Peace,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, mn - Thursday, November 11, 2004 7:24 PM CST
Hi there Monica! You continue to write from MY heart, as well as your own. :) in Christian love
jan livingstone (Andy's Mom forever)
- Thursday, November 11, 2004 8:40 AM CST
Amen. I will continue to pray for the helpless, innocent lives and voices of the unborn children. They truly are precious gifts from God. Thank You, Monica.
I will also pray for these children in honor and memory of our very precious, very loved, and very remembered Saint Gabbie.
Love,
Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Wednesday, November 10, 2004 11:28 AM CST
Hey Monica-
Just checking in. I love the picture of Gabbie in her rare smile. She looks adorable. :) Hope you have a good day. I can't believe how much colder it's going to get by dinner time tonight. Brrrrr! We've been spoiled with these 60 degree days.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
GAYLORD, MN USA - Wednesday, November 10, 2004 9:01 AM CST
Hi Monica,
Our lives really are poorer now that our children have died. And they will never be the same and we will always be sad about their death, as long we we live on this earth. Thank you for sharing that with others, as those who have not lost a child may not understand. It is so comforting reading your notes on grief as I can relate to them so well. Thinking about you and beautiful Gabbie today - I love her rare smile!
Love,
Jen Buckentine
~ Zachary's Page ~ <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Tuesday, November 9, 2004 1:05 PM CST
Just wanted to say Hello..
You guys are in my thoughts and prayers always..
Love, Sara
The Hammers <hammeertime311@comcast.net>
- Monday, November 8, 2004 11:40 PM CST
HI MONICA, Just thinking about Gabbie this evening and thought I would stop by and visit. I enjoy reading your journals very much. I can't even imagine how you go through each and every day without Gabbie. You are such an inspiration to all of us who visit. Jesus cares and I care. Much love and many hugs from Ohio, Barb
www.caringbridge.org/oh/heidi "become an organ donor . . . give your heart to Jesus"
Barb <babogner@earthlink.net>
Mansfield, OHIO USA - Saturday, November 6, 2004 7:10 PM CST
Wishing you well and letting you know you are in my prayers.
www.caringbridge.org/ky/ryanbrown
Ryan's Nana
sherry <scourtney209@hotmail.com>
st louis, mo - Wednesday, November 3, 2004 8:39 PM CST
Remembering GABRIELLE on All Soul's Day
God bless all of Gabbie's family.
Grace and peace,
Colette
Colette
Clifton Park, NY U.S.A. - Tuesday, November 2, 2004 9:04 PM CST
Monica,
Thank you for sharing your love for the sanctity of human life and for marriage as God intended it to be. We will be voting on Tuesday and bringing Brady with to show him what it is all about and how important it is. Sadly, you are right, the Bible does tell us that life on this earth will get far worse before Jesus returns. At the same time, we must stand up for what is right, in God's eyes.
Thinking of your family and remembering beautiful little Gabrielle.
Love,
Jen, Bill, Brady and Saint Zachary Buckentine
Zachary's Site <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Sunday, October 31, 2004 2:42 PM CST
Monica,
I haven't posted for such a long time, but I visit very often. I wanted you to know that I think of all of you very often. And I continue to keep you all very close to my heart and prayers. (((Big Hugs)))
Connie, Bob, Allie and Madelyn (www.caringbridge.org/mn/missmadelyn) <Roco595@aol.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Sunday, October 31, 2004 9:06 AM CST
Hi Paquettes!
Just wanted to say Hello and that I am grateful for your continued journeling.
I also echo your words about protecting the unborn.
Jenny did a report in her class last week on Blessed Mother Teresa. What a wonderful human being she was, and example she is for humankind. A couple quotes of Mother Theresa Jenny included in her paper are 2 of my favorites. One is " a child is a gift from God; if you do not want him give him to me". And she WAS a mother to so many uncared for and unloved children.
The second quote of hers was "We should not serve the poor like they were Jesus; we should serve the poor because they are Jesus."
I know she is an example of someone who I personally strive to be more like. (Sadly I am not even *remotely* close! :o)
I often think of another popular saying she had.. "Do small things with great love". That has changed my life as well.
Anyway, just wanted to share this with you as I was refecting on the lovely words you had for protecting the children. Thank You.
You always have my love and support and prayers!
Sara
PS I will be thinking of Saint Gabbie on All Saints Day on Monday.
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Saturday, October 30, 2004 9:05 PM CDT
Hi my name is Heidi, I have never visited your lovely daughters place here before. I am a CB friend, I came by this as I was trying to visit Luke, but I don't believe it was an accident. Much prayers for your family, I will visit again. I can be found at www.caringbridge.org/oh/heidi,
Heidi <hjlowe1@hotmail.com>
Mansfield, OH USA - Saturday, October 30, 2004 7:49 AM CDT
Dear Monica,
Even though Gabbie was here such a short time, she has made a bigger, more positive impact than most adults.
With much love,
Andrea
Andrea
- Friday, October 29, 2004 4:24 PM CDT
Good Morning Monica and family-
Hoping you have a good day! It's great that it's going to be warm today; now if we could just get a little sunshine. :)
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
GAYLORD, MN USA - Friday, October 29, 2004 10:32 AM CDT
Dear Monica,
I certainly do worry more about the future world now that I have a child of my own. Thinking of Gabbie and praying for you.
God bless,
Michelle
Michelle Rice <michelle.rice@gpmlaw.com>
Forest Lake, MN - Friday, October 29, 2004 10:21 AM CDT
Dearest Monica,
Thinking of you often during this difficult month.
My mother was so thankful that Jack Corbo got his heart transplant on what would have been my brother's 48th birthday but still so very sad that my brother is not here. It's been nine years since he died but it still seems like it was only yesterday. I can only imagine the pain of losing a child to a hideous disease. I pray I never have to endure it.
I believe the election is beginning to get to everyone. I have never seen such negativity in my life. What happened to respect? I'm frightened at times of the world my children are growing up in.
Take care!!
God bless!
Hugs,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, mn - Thursday, October 28, 2004 5:15 PM CDT
Monica,
I'm thinking of your precious little blondie baby today...picturing her big, big eyes and solemn face. What a precious child of God and continued gift to us all. I am so sad that she isn't here, but you are right that she is safe from evil. In that way, I do think that God spared both Gabbie and Theresa...they carried their crosses very valiantly and now have their crowns of righteousness in heaven. I simply cannot wait to be reunited with both of them and of course our loving Lord!
Love, God bless you and indeed we too are praying for the election,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <weLoveTeesa@earthlink.net, www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose>
st. paul, mn usa - Thursday, October 28, 2004 3:37 PM CDT
Hi Monica, Always nice to see that you visited Heidi and signed her guestbook. You are such an inspiration to me. Honestly I don't know know how you do it. That picture of Gabby is just so precious. I read how you say that she endured her disease silently and it shows in her picture. Gabby did not die but lives the hearts of those who loved her. I love to come to Gabby's page and always feel better when I leave her page. I will never forget Gabby. Keep up Gabby's good work, she continues to touch many lives, Jesus loves you and I love you. Much love and many hugs from Ohio, Barb
www.caringbridge.org/oh/heidi "become an organ donor . . . give your heart to Jesus"
Barb <babogner@earthlink.net>
Mansfield, Ohio USA - Thursday, October 28, 2004 6:11 AM CDT
Dear Monica,
Thinking of you and praying for you tonight. The picture of Gabbie is beautiful.
With Love,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Wednesday, October 27, 2004 7:42 PM CDT
Hey Monica-
Just wanted to stop by and say hi. It was very beautiful outside yesterday so my girls sure made use of a good day! I bet Noah sure enjoys those stroller rides with you. :)
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
GAYLORD, MN USA - Tuesday, October 26, 2004 1:27 PM CDT
i prey for gabbie even tho she left to be with jesus and i am praying for you
love lindsaY
http://hey-lindsay.tripod.com/index.html
lindsay <wearyellow03@aol.com>
- Monday, October 25, 2004 11:41 AM CDT
What an adorable picture of Gabbie!!
Jenn Hartley <ronjenn696@prodigy.net>
bensalem, pa USA - Saturday, October 23, 2004 1:39 PM CDT
That is the most precious picture of Gabby, your words "she endured with silent tears" is sort of obvious in her facial expressions in the many photos of her I have seen on your site, but this playful picture is what you wish she had been able to have all the time.
Monica, I come to this site with the knowledge I am going to hear a Word from the Lord. I have been a follower of Jesus Christ for 55 years and you have a God-given ability to say much in very few words. You are a testament of what Jesus can do with a broken heart. I know you're not perfect and have as many warts as anybody else, but, my sister, you are a beautiful, broken-hearted mama, who only in eternity will know how her darling child's illness,and death made a major impact for the Kingdom. Blessings to you and yours. Dixie
Dixie Bly <Dixiebly@aol.com>
Boiling Springs, SC USA - Saturday, October 23, 2004 9:16 AM CDT
Monica, I echo your sentiments both on abortion and how people make such a celebration out of this "holiday" halloween. I was biking through my neighborhood too a couple of weeks ago and noticed one of Joscelyn's school friend's display. It also had a "dead guy" reaching up through the ground like a zombie, and lots of other dead things/tombstones/etc. Maybe we are more sensitive, but rightfully so- we have had to lay our precious precious children in those graves... To see such things makes a mockery of the dead. We pray for them, and others, to focus on the GOOD, not idolize the dark. Thanks for always checking in and signing Lukie's guestbook...We love you and your family! PS> AWESOME pic on the homepage of Gabbie!! I bet she and Luke would have gotten along famously!!!
Ivy Ervin - * Forever Missing Luke* <ivymeadows@earthlink.net http://caringbridge.org/oh/lukeervin>
Mansfield, - Friday, October 22, 2004 8:51 PM CDT
Thank you for speaking the truth on that terrible issue of abortion. It truely is a sacrifice to demons. I cannot understand how people can be so blinded. God bless this ministry of truth.
Dianne Goings <dianneg@integraonline.com>
Prior Lake, MN - Friday, October 22, 2004 11:55 AM CDT
Dear Monica,
Just thinking of you today and wanted to catch up on some of your entries. There is no one perfect church, but you will know if it's right for you. Thank you for continuing to share your journey with us. Have a nice weekend.
God bless,
Michelle
Michelle Rice <michelle.rice@gpmlaw.com>
Forest Lake, MN - Friday, October 22, 2004 9:59 AM CDT
Dear Monica,
As I celebrate Hannah's 9th birthday tomorrow, I will be thinking of the Clyde family and wishing they have Theresa Rose with them to celebrate as well.
I hope that when people continue to decide who to vote for, they will think about things like abortion, protecting our homeland, etc. Who can do it better? Who has better moral judgement? I think we all know who that is.
Have a wonderful weekend!
Hugs,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Friday, October 22, 2004 7:55 AM CDT
Monica,
Abortion is the ultimate evil. Period.
As a mom to an adopted daughter, I cannot express my thanks adequately to our wonderful daughter's birth mom. She sacrificed for her child, made a tough decision to not parent herself and trusted us to raise her beloved little girl. God's grace has seen this brave woman through and will continue to be by her side, letting her know she made the best choice possible...life.
Praying for you and hoping you have a good weekend,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <WeLoveTeesa@earthlink.net, www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose>
St. Paul, MN United States - Thursday, October 21, 2004 10:38 PM CDT
Monica,
As one who went through 12 years of infertility work-ups and endless times of trying to conceive, abortion is unimaginable to me. My husband and I would have done just about anything to have a baby, and we practically did! We live in a very self-centered society that does not want to be incovenienced or troubled by anything that was not planned or desired. I have NEVER met a woman that had an abortion and did not suffer guilt and grief over the fact that she had chosen to kill her unborn child. I even have a friend that was raped by a man of a different race that chose to abort her baby and to this day she regrets it. She as wept many a time over her "CHOICE". Once a woman becomes a mother, she always wishes she could go back and change what she CHOSE. You probably have heard this before, but just in case you have not....there is only the difference of two letters that can make all the difference in the world to an unborn child. ABORTION.... with a D in place of the B and a P in place of the R......ADOPTION. There are so many people wanting to adopt healthy and special needs babies. I will never understand how people cannot sacrafice 9 months of their life to incovenience and then place the child up for adoption. Allowing your child to be adopted is often the most unselfish act imaginable. God bless you Monica for speaking out about the signs and bumper stickers and the importance of voting for the candidate that follows God's word. To me as a Christian, there is no doubt which candidate should be elected. I do not believe in everything George W. Bush believes in, but when you look at the alternative, there is NO OTHER CHOICE. I do believe that he is a man of God and his heart is a heart of God, and for that I am thankful and pray for him each day to lead our country in the right direction.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, - Thursday, October 21, 2004 8:30 PM CDT
I will certainly be praying for your church situation. I also just wanted to get things going with the list if you are up for that. If not, no worries, I TOTALLY understand. I have been buried since July. But, email me at work so we can touch base. If we can't do anything now, we can look toward January if you'd like. I can't get to all my HE CARES email at the moment but want to take care of this as it has been burdening my heart more and more recently. As I said, I'll be praying for where God has a church home carved out for you. I know there is a place. You can also call my cell phone 336 250 9175 if that is easier for you. You are loved, prayed for and thought of as a very dear friend. I have missed being in close contact with you over the past several months. I'm looking forward to getting back in touch. Hugs!
Khalita <khalita@hecaresonline.org>
Lexington, NC - Thursday, October 21, 2004 2:42 PM CDT
Hi Monica,
Thinking of you today and wondering how are you (I do this daily!).
There is a sweet girl who needs prayers. Her name is Kylie and she has Stage III Neuroblastoma. Things don't look so good for her right now so everyone needs to pray for this sweet girl to survive.
http://www2.caringbridge.org/ga/kyliescorner/
Take care,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Thursday, October 21, 2004 10:31 AM CDT
Hi Monica,
We attended an Evangelical Free church for 6 years. Our E-Free church was a mega church and after 6 years we decided to return to a smaller denomination that we had attended for 10 years prior. One of the reasons we starting attending the E-Free church was, because of the size of the church. We thought they would have more to offer our children in programs. They definitely did, but my boys always struggled with the size of the E-Free church. They are much happier being back at a smaller church.
I can only say good things about the Evangelical Free church. They have a very sound doctrine that is biblically based and the particular church we attended was very mission oriented and active in the community. All of the sermons and Sunday School teachings were based on the inerrancy of God's word. It was a wonderful church, just too big for our family, especially my kids. We wanted to feel like we had a church family that we were connected to, and that sounds like what you are looking for too. It is very difficult to feel a part of a mega church, or at least that is what we found to be true for us. Our E-Free church had small churches within the large church, and we attended a small church, but it still is not the same as an overall church family where everyone knows each other and nurtures and cares for each other. You can really get lost in the crowd in a mega church. I hope you find what you are searching for in a church and I will be praying for your needs to be met at the Evangelical Free church. I believe from what I have read in the past year in your journals and the few e-mails we have exchanged, that the E-Free church is a very good fit for you. God bless.
Love,
Debbie Nagy <nagyhome@earthlink.net>
St. Louis, MO - Wednesday, October 20, 2004 11:44 PM CDT
Happy Happy Birthday Aubrey!! I hope you enjoyed your day!
Monica, thank you for sharing that verse from Jeremiah. How truly precious life is.
Love,
Jen Buckentine
Zachary's Site <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Monday, October 18, 2004 7:33 PM CDT
I know you will have a joyous year being 6 years old Aubrey. Needing two hands to count your age is a BIG DEAL! You are growing up! May God continue to shower you with peace and blessings. You are a wonderful girl!
Love, Mary
Mary Akagi <b.akagi@worldnet.att.net>
Maple Grove, MN - Monday, October 18, 2004 4:00 PM CDT
Thinking of you always and wanted to wish Aubrey a very Happy Birthday...Spencer just turned 6 last week, I can not believe how old they are getting.
Take Care
Shannon Hujanen <hujanenfamily@mcleodusa.net>
Blaine, MN USA - Monday, October 18, 2004 1:07 PM CDT
Happy, Happy Birthday Miss Aubrey! Hope it was great!
I posted a few days ago about Jack Corbo needing a heart. He got it today! He will be on WCCO tonight and tomorrow (I emailed them to do a story)! This would have been my brother's 48th birthday if he hadn't died of kidney failure nine years ago. I believe there is something to the fact that Jack got his heart on this day. What a wonderful gift some grieving family has given. When things like this happen, it helps me continue to have faith in people.
I hope your weekend has been good even though it's been cold!!
Take care!!
Hugs!!
Love,
Susan
http://www.caringbridge.org/mn/corboboys/index.htm
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Sunday, October 17, 2004 8:15 PM CDT
Happy Birthday Ms. Aubrey!
With love...
The family of Jackson Espeseth <eaglet@cltcomm.net>
- Sunday, October 17, 2004 5:41 PM CDT
Happy 6th Birthday Aubrey! We all hope you have a great day! Missing Gabbie with you and your family always!
Love ..
The Clarks
Rebekah Clark <mommy_jaden@yahoo.com>
Prior Lake, MN USA - Sunday, October 17, 2004 2:40 PM CDT
Miss Aubrey...
HAPPY BIRTHDAY Sweetie... I hope you have a wonderful day!!
Hopefully your package arrived safely...
Have a fun time with Mommy, Daddy & Noah tonight for your Birthday supper.
Lots of Love & Hugs to you from me !!
XOXOXOXOXOXO
Love,
Angel Sheryl
John & Monica~
My thoughts & prayers are with you always...
I know that the 17th will always be a day that you will remember no matter what month it is...
So today & every month on the 17th I light a candle and say a little prayer for your family!
God Bless~
Love,
Angel Sheryl
Sheryl Gunzenhauser <mik181@mchsi.com>
Winnebago, MN - Sunday, October 17, 2004 7:42 AM CDT
Happy Birthday Aubrey!!! You have yourself a wonderful birthday today sweetie. May God continue to give you a happy, healthy life with your wonderful family. You are such a blessing to your mommy and daddy and little brother!!
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Sunday, October 17, 2004 1:21 AM CDT
HAPPY BIRTHDAY MISS AUBREY!!! Six years old.....WOW! A very important birthday indeed! Be sure and have you Mommy tell us what color bike you picked out; that was a very important decision around our house. Luckily, we were able to find a blue, yellow and orange one at our first stop. ( a few special years ago) Monica, hope you enjoy the stamping convention. I am not the least bit crafty myself; but am being forced into the scraping thing. I just can't find baby books (for adopted children) that make me happy... so I will be making my own. The change of the season, into fall, is presently a huge struggle for me. So many shattered dreams & wishful yearnings.... trying to make the best of it all. I have my bereaved parents support group today; it'll be nice to be with other folks that understand. Have a great weekend & a terrific birthday dinner party! God bless! Your sister in Christ
jan livingstone (Andy's Mom forever)
IL - Saturday, October 16, 2004 7:28 AM CDT
Happy Birthday Aubrey! Hope it's wonderful! You have a nice cold weekend in Minnesota to enjoy it.
Please say prayers for Jack Corbo. He was born 06/04 along with his twin brother, Cooper. Jack is currently waiting for a heart. He is now on day 70.
http://www.caringbridge.org/mn/corboboys/index.htm
Hope you have a wonderful weekend!!
Take care!
Love,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Saturday, October 16, 2004 7:09 AM CDT
Happy 6th Birthday Aubrey - a day earlier!! I hope your birthday is fun!!
Jenn Hartley <ronjenn696@prodigy.net>
bensalem, pa USA - Saturday, October 16, 2004 6:38 AM CDT
Monica,
I have prayed for that family as well. I will be praying hard for the man who hit them as he was legally drunk and talking on a cell phone. I hope everyone else will too.
Hugs,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, mn - Wednesday, October 13, 2004 6:07 AM CDT
Dear Monica,
You read my mind and and expressed my feelings exactly when I also heard of the 3 brothers who were killed. I thought of you when I heard them speak and I thanked God they have such beautiful faith in our Savior.
I cannot even fathom this tragedy and their loss.
I have no words but only tears.
But I also thank the Lord for their faith.
That is a gift.
Thank you for sharing and expressing what was in my heart as well.
I join you in praying for that family.
I can't even begin to imagine 1/100000000+ of their loss.
My heart is so heavy with pain for them.
God be with them.
Love,
Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Tuesday, October 12, 2004 10:23 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
You read my mind and and expressed my feelings exactly when I also heard of the 3 brothers who were killed. I thought of you when I heard them speak and I thanked God they have such beautiful faith in our Savior.
I cannot even fathom this tragedy and their loss.
I have no words but only tears.
But I also thank the Lord for their faith.
That is a gift.
Thank you for sharing and expressing what was in my heart as well.
I join you in praying for that family.
I can't even begin to imagine 1/100000000+ of their loss.
My heart is so heavy with pain for them.
God be with them.
Love,
Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Tuesday, October 12, 2004 10:22 PM CDT
Hey! Just wanted to send some prayers your way! We are new to the caringbridge family, and hope you like Sarah bears webpage!
http://www2.caringbridge.org/europe/sarahbear/
Love your NB family from Belgium, Airun Mum, Alyson Airun
and Sarah bear.
Alyson <airunmum@hotmail.com>
- Tuesday, October 12, 2004 7:43 PM CDT
My heart just aches for the Backstom family and they will be in my prayers. I am so thankful that they know Jesus as their Savior, but even so, the pain and grief have to be unimaginable.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
- Tuesday, October 12, 2004 5:34 PM CDT
Congratulations on your 10th anniversary.
Chris ~ Gooch's Site ~
- Saturday, October 9, 2004 10:02 PM CDT
Dear Monica, happy 10th anniversary to you & John! I hope you have enjoyed nice weather and some lake walks this week-end. We are finally starting to cool down a little which makes walking much easier! It sounds like a beautiful Mass you went to as all of our babies are precious, even the ones we haven't been blessed to meet yet. The story of Gabbie's silent tears just breaks my heart, she truly is a special little saint!
Robin Boger <Robin.Boger@rbc.com>
Lewisville, NC - Saturday, October 9, 2004 9:41 PM CDT
Monica and John,
Happy anniversary to you both!!
Monica- I hope you have a nice walk around the lake with your friend-the weather here is lovely today that is for sure!!
My Love, Respect, Support and Prayers Always,
Sara
www.caringbridge.com/mn/danielhammer <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Saturday, October 9, 2004 1:33 PM CDT
Happy Anniversary Monica and John! We share the same wedding anniversary date, you guys are just a lot younger than my husband (Bob) and me. It was 26 years for us yesterday. Hope you had a wonderful day. Praying for you always.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
- Friday, October 8, 2004 2:30 PM CDT
Happy Anniversary Monica and John!!! I hope you have a memorable time celebrating such an accomplishment! You are right, you HAVE been through so very much together and yet see how strong God has made you through it! *** It broke my heart to read about Gabbie's 'silent tears' when it came time to go each evening.... how that must haunt you, the helplessness and agony of having to leave. My heart aches for all of you. Gabbie was unusually strong- of that I am sure. It shouldn't be a surprise- look how resilient her Mommy and Daddy are! May God bless you both with much happiness and abundant love!!!!! In Christ's love...
Ivy Ervin *Forever Missing Luke* <ivymeadows@earthlink.net http://www.caringbridge.org/oh/lukeervin>
Mansfield, Ohio - Thursday, October 7, 2004 8:05 PM CDT
Dearest Monica,
I check in on you daily. It sounds like the service last night was very moving and beautiful. After suffering two miscarriages myself it is nice to know that some people acknowledge them.
Please pray for Conner - scans show new tumors/growth.
http://www3.caringbridge.org/tn/connorhunley/index.htm
Take care and God Bless,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, mn - Thursday, October 7, 2004 4:25 PM CDT
Monica,
Thank you for your help and attendence at the Mass! It was beautiful and I couldn't help but sob as I saw all the candles on the altar...so many innocent lives, loved by so many still on earth. And Gabbie's light continues to shine so brightly, both on the altar that night and forever in our hearts.
Love and God bless you,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose, weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Thursday, October 7, 2004 3:50 PM CDT
I am glad to read that you were able to attend the mass last night. It sounds like it was nice and very meaningful. We will be attending a similar type of mass tonight in St. Cloud. It is so nice to have an hour focused solely on God and our children who left us much too early. And how neat that you got to meet baby Mary! Hope that you are all staying healthy!
Love,
Jen, Bill, Brady and Saint Zachary Buckentine
~ Zachary's Page ~ <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Thursday, October 7, 2004 1:10 PM CDT
Monica-
I'm glad the church service was so nice for you guys. :)
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
GAYLORD, MN USA - Thursday, October 7, 2004 11:14 AM CDT
Monica I know I've told you this before but I'll say it again. I hope god will give me the previlage to meet Gabbie one day in heaven. I would love to take her in my arms and tell her how special she is to so many people.
God bless you
www.caringbridge.org/ca/nikicamarena
Sally Torres <sally_torres@lusknet.com>
Anaheim, Ca - Wednesday, October 6, 2004 6:31 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
Glad to hear that Noah is doing much better. I'm sorry that the memories never get any easier. I mourn with you. Thinking of Saint Gabbie and praying for some strength for you today.
God bless,
Michelle
Michelle Rice <michelle.rice@gpmlaw.com>
Forest Lake, MN - Wednesday, October 6, 2004 12:45 AM CDT
When you wrote about Gabbie's silent tears yesterday it absolutely broke my heart. I can't imagine what a difficult time that must have been for you and the scars that it has left you with. I truly hope that Gabbie and all the other kids are getting all the peace and happiness that Heaven can afford...they so deserve it! Some day I hope that peace and happiness will be yours as well.
Rhonda Meyer <rschultz@scl.doc.state.mn.us>
- Wednesday, October 6, 2004 12:09 AM CDT
Monica,
I'm sadly thinking of Gabbie's silent tears and offering some of my own silent tears right now...she was so brave.
Cathy, Mary and st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose, weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Tuesday, October 5, 2004 4:48 PM CDT
Hey Monica-
Glad to hear that Noah is doing better! :) I wish I could do something to lessen your pain just a little bit. . .
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
GAYLORD, MN USA - Tuesday, October 5, 2004 10:47 AM CDT
Thankful to read that Noah is better. Monica, my heart aches for you as you write of missing Gabbie. How you must miss her so much....silent tears I shed for you my dear friend.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
- Monday, October 4, 2004 9:32 PM CDT
Praying for all of you to feel peace with Noah's fever. I certainly can understand John's anxiety and fears after losing Gabbie. I will definitely pray that Noah is fever free very soon.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
- Friday, October 1, 2004 11:07 PM CDT
Monica and John, I totally empathize with today's entry about anxiety over Noah's fevers... Just one week ago I was stressing over Dane's dr. appt, concern over why his one eye is bi-colored. Turns out to be just God's special mark on him but you *never know*... I think that question is always going to be in the back (front) of our minds. "Cancer is rare in children" they will tell you, trying to pacify you... "You shouldn't jump to conclusions" or "Don't be so pessimistic"> Yeah right! I say back!! Follow me to a whole floor of a hospital and I will show you what "rare" "pessimistic" "should've jumped to a conclusion sooner" children look like!!! How can we 'not' wonder??? And yet as we do, we must also carry the knowledge of Christ's grace and mercy. And strength. Hey, we have seen what many consider to be one of the worst things. And God saw us through it. "If God is FOR us, who (or what) can prevail against us??" Not even cancer.... In prayer for you all this weekend. We love you
Ivy Ervin - * Forever Missing Luke* <ivymeadows@earthlink.net http://caringbridge.org/oh/lukeervin>
Mansfield, Ohio - Friday, October 1, 2004 8:40 PM CDT
Dear Monica, John and the Family,
Sincere thank you from our hearts for your sharing. Sometimes we just can't climb out off the valley without turning ourselves to God. Reading your posting always turns out blessing and inspiration to my family. Just let you know we love and will pray for your family.
Benjamin, Paulina, Erin (Forever Family with ~Esther~) <Mercy2Live@yahoo.com>
Fairborn, OH US - Thursday, September 30, 2004 2:41 PM CDT
And blessed are we to know her via your entries. She truly continues to be a strong warrior for Christ from heaven!
Love,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose, weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Wednesday, September 29, 2004 9:39 PM CDT
Hello my friend. It seems like so long since I have posted, and I am sorry for that. I do come here just about every day, and always appreciate your entries. You are in my thoughts and heart always.
Jackson's mom, Michelle
- Wednesday, September 29, 2004 9:18 PM CDT
Hey Monica and family-
Glad to hear you guys had a good weekend. It was absolutely beautiful.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
GAYLORD, MN USA - Tuesday, September 28, 2004 3:43 PM CDT
Baby Jordan is no longer in pain and has gone to heaven. I'm sure the anguish and loss his parents feels in indescribable.
I try to go to Allie Scott's site and when I do and read the journal entries it literally takes my breath away. I see my babies in Allie's face and I can't fathom the pain her parents face and all parents that have lost their child deal with....
Your strength is amazing.
Take care!
Hugs,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Monday, September 27, 2004 10:14 PM CDT
Monica, wow...I'm jealous of your summer-like weather! We are starting to feel the effects of the hurricane in good "ole NC. Thank you for your kind words in Jordan's journal. You are so faithful to visit other sites especially to offer comforting words to parents like Carrie & Patrick who have been devastated at the loss of their sweet child. I'm sure that it must be heartbreaking for you as well while you know the pain of losing your child. Jordan's death has been especially painful for me as I was blessed with opportunities to see and play with him and of course, fall in love with him. It also brings back painful reminders of my good friend's son's death from MPS only 18 months ago. I've shared with you before that I am Moravian. Our Watchword for the week from our Daily Text yesterday was as follows: 2 Timothy 1:10, Christ Jesus has abolished death and brought life and immortality to light through the gospel. I'm amazed at how many times something set so far in advance will be exactly what I need to hear on a certain day. I'm so thankful that He has abolished death and brought us the promise of life...as long as we believe so that we can "be dere". Again, thank you for your kinds words. God bless!
Robin Boger <Robin.Boger@rbc.com>
Lewisville, NC - Monday, September 27, 2004 7:47 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
Just wanted you to know I was thinking of you today. Sounds like you had a very enjoyable weekend with Aubrey and Noah.
Please share my congratulations with Cathy and Nate for their new precious daughter. I will keep them in my prayers during this waiting period.
Missing and Loving Gabbie with you- you grieve with Hope but grieve all the same!
Love to you,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Monday, September 27, 2004 7:26 PM CDT
Hi Monica,
Beautiful, beautiful picture of Momma and Gabbie.
Boy, I think she looks a lot like Noah at that age.
Thinking of you and praying for you always!
Hugs to you all..
My love and support to you always!!
Sara
www.caringbridge.com/mn/danielhammer <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Monday, September 27, 2004 12:35 AM CDT
Just checking in on you and your family.
Take care of one another,
Natalie Martin-Rak (www.caringbridge.com/fl/lina) <vladanat@comcast.net>
Jacksonville, FL - Saturday, September 25, 2004 3:24 PM CDT
Ahhhh...His strength is made PERFECT in our weakness and HE will perfect that which concerneth us. HALLELUYA!! Naw, of course we're not perfect, just FORGIVEN!!! Love Ya!
Yolanda <galatians5@truevine.net>
Altamonte Springs, FL USA - Friday, September 24, 2004 8:22 PM CDT
Hi Monica! I saw the 'pre-deleted' entry & I agree with you 100%. I couldn't have said it better myself!!! (wink-wink.) ;) I hope you all have a wonderful weekend. The weather here is suppose to be delightful; upper 70s and sunny. We're having another sale/fundraiser tomorrow, for the 'baby fund.' It also helps to fill this anxious waiting time! :) God bless
jan livingstone (Andy's Mom forever)
IL - Friday, September 24, 2004 7:28 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
Even though I have been meaning to sign the guestbook all week, I have been interrupted each time I go to your site.
I really enjoyed meeting you in person even though it was difficult to talk at a wedding reception. I said to my husband after you left how strong you are in your faith because I don't know how I would get up every day if I lost one of my children. I have no idea what your pain is like but as a mother I can imagine. My heart breaks each and every time another child is lost to cancer and unfortunately there are too many.
I was happy to see that Gabbie was remembered at the wedding and your family there does not ever forget about her. I saw Elizabeth's button on her purse and mentioned the picture of her and Gabbie. She thanked me for remembering. I will never forget. You have made such an impact on my life and the way I do things.
Thank you for continuing to post and letting us into your life. It is a privilege that you share yourself with all of us.
Hugs,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Friday, September 24, 2004 6:08 AM CDT
Monica, I'm sorry I haven't signed for awhile. I'm still following your journey without Gabbie and your walk of faith and bringing others to Christ. I love that interpretation of Psalm 23. It really makes sense when you pull apart each phrase. Even after almost 2 1/2 years I think of little Gabbie every day, and I never even was lucky enough to meet her while she was here. I am one of those whose life she forever touched, and I think that today I am a better person because of her. Not perfect, no, but improved! Love in Christ,
Mari Beth <jerryandmaribethross@comcast.net>
Hugo, MN - Thursday, September 23, 2004 11:10 PM CDT
Monica,
It has been so long since I've been here and I missed Gabbie and your words of wisdom immensely! Hopefully, when I get a little bit of time, I'll sit down and get caught up in your past entries. Even though I haven't dropped in lately, you and your family and especially Gabbie still cross my mind often. Have a peace-filled and blessed weekend....
Christy <calee59@wi.rr.com>
S. Milwaukee, wi - Thursday, September 23, 2004 8:26 PM CDT
Monica,
I don't feel you need to "explain away" the misunderstanding from "never worthy in your eyes". Christians are misunderstood every single day and if we were always "explaining away" we would never be able to do God's work. I think you made a wise decision.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
- Thursday, September 23, 2004 8:11 PM CDT
Hi Monica, I'm off to Denver tomorrow and then a drive to western Kansas for my high school reunion. As always, Gabbie will be coming with me in my heart and my thoughts. I will line up behind you someday to hold her as well...I can't even imagine how long that line will be. She has touched so many because of your love.
May God bless you and keep you,
Love, Mary
b.akagi@worldnet.att.net <b.akagi@worldnet.att.net>
Maple Grove, MN - Thursday, September 23, 2004 8:10 PM CDT
Monica,
I love the version of the 23rd psalm! Of course, you may have the story from our website...it is one to be shared over and over.
Loving Gabbie today and wishing she were still in your loving arms...
Love and God bless,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose, weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Thursday, September 23, 2004 7:46 PM CDT
Monica I just clicked on to see your pictures and it's amazing how much Noah looks like Gabbie, hes a handsome little guy just as Gabbie is beautful. Her Beauty must shine even more now in heaven.
God bless you
Sally Torres <sally_torres@lusknet.com>
Anaheim, ca - Thursday, September 23, 2004 3:39 PM CDT
Hi Monica I've haven't sighned in awhile but I always pray for your family. Gabbie has truly touched my life Your faith has really helped me out in my own faith especially now, my mom just passed away this past Saturday from AML and it's hard but I feel god has really been there for us comferting us.
God bless you
www.caringbridge.org/ca/nikicamarena
Sally Torres <sally_torres@lusknet.com>
Anaheim, ca - Tuesday, September 21, 2004 11:11 AM CDT
Dear Monica,
Just wanted you to know I'd been here reading. Thank you as always for being such a great example of sharing Jesus. Thinking of you!
With My Love,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@Insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Monday, September 20, 2004 8:03 PM CDT
Hi Monica, You inspire me so much through your faith. God can do anything you know - far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams! ... Ephesians 3:20 God works things out in unexpected and wonderful ways. We will never forget sweet "Gabbie". Jesus cares and I care. Love and hugs from Ohio, Barb
Barb www.caringbridge.org/oh/heidi <babogner@earthlink.net>
Mansfield, OHIO USA - Monday, September 20, 2004 3:30 PM CDT
Hi Monica,
My love, prayers, support and deepest respect are always with you!
Love in Christ,
Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Sunday, September 19, 2004 9:21 PM CDT
Hi Monica,
Just wanted you to know that I was thinking of you today. Thinking of your precious Gabbie too who endured so much. I'm so glad she's Safe in the Arms of Jesus, but my heart aches for and with a Mommy who longs to hold her here on earth.
With Love,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Saturday, September 18, 2004 6:44 PM CDT
Monica,
I hope you never do "move on". Gabbie and the cross of her death has forever changed you and you are truly gold tested in fire. Shine on dear sister in Christ, even through your tears and your broken heart.
Much love to you,
another mom who will NEVER move on...
Cathy and st. Theresa <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose, weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Friday, September 17, 2004 10:01 PM CDT
Good morning Monica,
While I haven't signed in in a while, I have been faithfully reading Gabbie's site. I know that you have moved on. What people need to realize is that moving on does not mean you will be the same person you were before Gabbie died. The death of a child changes a person - forever. We will never, ever be the same people again. And even though we may move on, we will never ever forget and never ever stop loving our children. You are such a loving momma and that is why you are now a deeply changed momma. Thank you so much for sharing Jesus with us. Wishing you a weekend filled with many long walks.
Love,
Jen Buckentine
Zachary's Site <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Friday, September 17, 2004 6:59 AM CDT
Dear Monica,
"Moving on" does not mean that the pain goes away. You have moved on, but you will always ache because of the loss of Gabbie. If you had not moved on you would be curled up in a ball in the corner of a dark room....I believe you are functioning, caring for children, going to work, giving love and support to your husband, and offering care and concern to other parents that are facing similar situations of childhood illness or death. If that is not moving on, I don't know what is. If there are people saying you haven't moved on, then they are unrealistic and ridiculous with their thinking. The death of a child never goes away. It just becomes more bearable as time passes, and even then it is extremely difficult to say the least. I believe until these people experience loss they will "never get it". Sorry if I spoke too much, it just upsets me to think that others accuse you of not moving on. Have a nice time at the wedding this weekend.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, - Thursday, September 16, 2004 9:09 PM CDT
Monica- Thank you so much for the card and thoughtful note. September has been a tough month, remembering Joe's last few weeks of life. Although it's difficult, I have to be thankful that he was able to be home and able to enjoy life like a little boy should. We are looking forward to the new baby. Of course, I'm a lot more guarded than I was with the other 3 pregnancies. Take Care. I check in often.
Cathy Rossini <trossini@comcast.net>
IGH, MN - Thursday, September 16, 2004 7:14 PM CDT
Hey Monica-
Just checking in. It's great to hear that Aubrey loves school and Noah enjoys going to daycare.
What a beautiful day today! Not too hot, not too cold. I bet you'll have time for a stroller ride tonight. Enjoy the day.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
GAYLORD, MN USA - Thursday, September 16, 2004 1:16 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
Please don't believe you are slacking, everyone grieves in different ways. Whether it be prayer, baking cookies or whittling wood. There is no "proper" way to grieve. Grief is expressed in different ways. You raise awareness through every person who knows about Gabbie.
9/11 ... A rough day for America. I was 22 with a 3 year old daughter and a 9 month old son .. scared out of my mind because I did not know what was going on in the world. Seeing the airplanes crash over and over on TV. Seeing all those people crying and grieving over lost loved ones. That day was a day of awakening for my family, it made us a stronger family. 9/11 made us open our eyes and see what we have and that is eachother. It may have been 3 years ago, but we still hold on to that feeling. Yes, you are truly right, MANY, MANY Americans have forgotten about 9/11 and are back into their go-go-go lifestyles. It's disheartening..
As for moving on ... your kids say it all. If they're happy then there must be something happy going on at home. Happy parents make for happy kids. There's nothing wrong with moving on - Gabbie will never be forgotten. Even though I didn't personally know her, I will never forget her!!
I hope you have a safe & happy weekend!
Jenn Hartley <ronjenn696@prodigy.net>
Bensalem, PA USA - Thursday, September 16, 2004 8:34 AM CDT
Good Morning Monica,
I do believe that you have "moved on", children are definitely a reflection of your parents. I also know that Gabbie is always so close in your thoughts. Your grief is neverending.
LaKota is 100% donor cells!!!!! Everyone do a dance!
Have a great day.
Hugs,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Thursday, September 16, 2004 6:41 AM CDT
Dearest Monica,
I don't see you as "slacking". Gabbie touched many hearts and mine was one of them. I have chosen to continue on and attempt to give support to those families I can on the journey through this hell on earth. I also promote awareness of children's cancer to my family, friends and people I meet.
You show us the undying love of a mother for her child and the journey your life has taken since she was taken from you. You provide inspiration. This site alone promotes cancer awareness. You are not a slacker!
Thinking of you!!
Hugs,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Wednesday, September 15, 2004 3:30 PM CDT
Dear Monica, John, Aubrey, and Noah,
I am just dropping by to let you know that all of you, and your Angel Gabrielle, are in my thoughts and prayers this week.
God bless you all!
Grace and peace,
~Colette~
Colette
Clifton Park, NY U.S.A. - Wednesday, September 15, 2004 2:36 AM CDT
Hi Monica,
Let me start off by saying that everyone should say a prayer and take time to visit Allie Scott's site; http://www.scotthousehold.com
Allie has been battling AML since this spring. The fight is now over and Allie has her wings. She would have been nine months old next week.
Any comfort we can try to give her parents would be wonderful. I know they will have to grieve for that baby the rest of their lives and I can't even imagine what that is like. If I could give them their baby back, healthy, I would do it in a minute. I hate that any family has to endure this terrible disease.
Secondly, I agree with you about 9/11. I take time and remember and re-watch the footage of the events just so I don't become complacent. I grieve for those who have lost family members and friends.
My daughter had Red, White and Blue Day at school this past Friday. They had a special assembly in remembrance of 9/11. She remembers and she was just starting kindergarten when it happened.
Take care and I look forward to finally meeting you on Saturday!
Hugs,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Tuesday, September 14, 2004 8:31 AM CDT
Dear Monica,
I am here visiting from Justyn's website. I am so sorry that you lost your precious daughter, Gabrielle. The hurt doesn't go away, but in Christ we all have the hope of seeing our loved ones again.
The Lutheran pastor, Diedrich Bonhoeffer had a valuable thought on what it means to live with a close one in God's nearer presence, which I want to share with you. Bonhoeffer was a prisoner, in a concentration camp, when he wrote these words, about the death of his wife.
"Nothing can make up for the absence of someone whom we love, and it would be wrong to try to find a substitute; we must simply hold out and see it through.
"That sounds very hard at first, but at the same time it is a great consolation, for the gap, as long as it remains unfilled, preserves the bonds between us. It is nonsense to say that God fills the gap; God doesn't fill it, but on the contrary, keeps it empty and so helps us to keep alive our former communion with each other, even at the cost of pain."
Monica, your name is the same as the mother of St. Augustine of Hippo, generally considered to be one of the greatest theologians of the universal Christian church. It was through her example and her prayer that Augustine came to Christ. May you live your life in such a way, that your children and others are always pointed to him.
God bless you!
Grace and peace,
~Colette~
Colette
Clifton Park (near Albany), NY U.S.A. - Tuesday, September 14, 2004 2:27 AM CDT
Hello friend! I've had you on my mind a great deal lately & thought I'd say hello. My computer was down for several weeks, so I haven't been around much...finally back up and running. We are doing alright; struggle with missing our oldest baby and longing for our two little ones to come home to us! We got new pictures, today, of our Gabrielle...she is absolutely beautiful!!! We hope to get new pictures of Peter any day now too. I'm afraid I may lose what is left of my mind, before we actually get to travel to Guatemala and bring them home with us...forever. :) God bless! with love,
jan livingstone (Andy's Mom forever)
IL - Monday, September 13, 2004 9:20 PM CDT
Monica,
Thank you for your simple and profound memorial of 9/11. The loss of innocent life is so sad in all circumstances...terroristic or cancer. God bless you as you continue to mourn your beautiful and most loved Gabbie.
Much love,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Monday, September 13, 2004 3:28 PM CDT
Monica,
Bless you for mentioning 9/11 on Gabbie's site. I know I will never forget the horror of that day. No one should ever forget!!! Unfortunately, I am afraid that our country does not still take it as serious as they did the months following 9/11/2001. I don't want to be judgemental and say that people have forgotten the day, but I do believe many have forgotten the constant threat we and all countries are under because of terrorism. To change society of much of the existent terrorism will take time, many years, and it seems to me that people are critical of the fact that it is not happening faster. Thanks for letting me use Gabbie's guest book to express my feelings on this very sad day. God bless you and your family always. Gabbie will never be forgotten either.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Saturday, September 11, 2004 10:50 PM CDT
Monica-
I'm glad to hear that Aubrey is having fun at school. Have a great weekend!
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
GAYLORD, MN USA - Friday, September 10, 2004 3:32 PM CDT
Monica,
Don't you cut those beautiful blonde locks any sooner than your heart desires!! Hope you have a peaceful week.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Tuesday, September 7, 2004 9:57 PM CDT
Just letting you know I think about Gabrielle and your family often. I (probably like others) still haven't the stomach to view any of the other sites you mention to visit of other ill children or children who are now with God. It's still too hard- especially having a 4 year old and a 1 year old. Memories of Gabrielle and having two young daughters have changed my life that way.
Take care and God bless
Michael Campbell <nel23@yahoo.com>
Andover, MN - Tuesday, September 7, 2004 10:14 AM CDT
Monica, I hope that Aubrey had a great first day of school and it's always nice to be able to spend one-on-one time with any of our children. Thank you for visiting Jordan's site but most of all, thank you for praying for him. I just feel that I have to comment on your statement that you're not "overly sensitive". I don't see how anyone could ever be overly sensitive after losing their child as honestly, that has to be the most difficult burden to bear while on this earth. Just know that you all remain in our thoughts & prayers. God bless.
Robin Boger <Robin.Boger@rbc.com>
Lewisville, NC - Tuesday, September 7, 2004 9:10 AM CDT
I love, just LOVE Gabbie's pic today! She "spoke" to me and I really can't explain what she said except that it was a combination of matter-of-fact admonition, encouragement and comforting reality.
Yolanda <galatians5@truevine.net>
Altamonte Springs, FL USA - Saturday, September 4, 2004 5:15 PM CDT
Hi, I am a first time visitor on your site. I saw your entry on Haley's site. I read through some of your entries and can see what a beautiful daughter your Gabbie was, and is. I just wanted you to know that another stranger is praying for you.
Audrey Fox <nojoicfox@hotmail.com>
- Saturday, September 4, 2004 9:58 AM CDT
Dear Monica,
I hope Aubrey had a great first day of school yesterday. Treasure each moment as much as you can, but I know you know that all too well. It seems like yesterday that my kids were just starting school, and now I have one graduating from high school next year. As far as I am concerned, the hostage situation in Russia is the devil at work. The evil that is so evident in terrorist can be attributed to nothing else in my book. I feel so strongly that we in American need to wake up to what is looming in the wings, and what could happen right in our own backyard, or should I say, own schools. I feel our children are the biggest target when it comes to future terrorist attacks in this country, and to be honest with you, it scares me beyond words. I don't think I could even face each day without my faith in God and my savior, Jesus Christ. Especially now with what is going on in the world. It is so frightening to our children too. We as parents must give them the assurance of Jesus and His promises, especially His promise of salvation. Only the Lord knows what they will be faced with in the years ahead, and without their faith, I believe they will have a difficult time surviving. There is so much to pray about tonight, but my prayers are especially for the children and their families in Russia, the people in the state of Florida as they wait for Frances to hit, and our country as we approach the upcoming election. My prayers also are for you and your precious family. You do always seem to say the most profound statements about the grief process and for that I thank you, because you have taught me so much in knowing what to say to others as they grieve.
God bless always and enjoy your precious Noah this weekend.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Friday, September 3, 2004 2:54 AM CDT
Your note on grief explains it so well..."We are not overly-sensitive. But we are in a very, very sensitive situation." If other people really understood this, talking with you about Gabbie really wouldn't be an impossible thing for them to do. I am glad that you have some people that do understand and can support you in this grief that will never lessen and always be there eating at your heart.
And I envy your time alone with Noah this weekend...sounds like good bonding time with him and good self nourishing for you :-)!
There are too many horrid things going on in our world...my 8th graders pray with me daily at school for these hostages...my students become more and more aware of the blessed circumstances they find themselves in, as we all should!
Praying for you, too--Melody
M. A. Bell <mabellteach@aol.com>
Baltimore, MD - Thursday, September 2, 2004 5:08 PM CDT
Monica,
Enjoy your time with little Noah man!!! You always find the best things to say about grief...and so succinctly. Yes, we are in a sensitive situation and everything seems to be magnified under this cross of our children's deaths. May God's grace be abundant in all of our lives as we struggle to carry on this earth until we are reunited in heaven.
Much love,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <WeLoveTeesa@earthlink.net; www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose>
st. paul, mn - Thursday, September 2, 2004 4:15 PM CDT
Monica and family-
Aubrey, I hope you have a great first day. My little girl starts Kindergarten tomorrow. Have a great day!
Monica-
I, too, can't imagine the emotions of those over in Russia and what's going on. I worry as well about what is all in our future in the US. I think part of my nervousness about Sierra going to school is because she is just growing up so quickly and I can't believe it and the other is that I worry about what she will all be exposed to. It's a much scarier world out there these days than it was when I was in school. I guess we can pray and do our best to keep everyone safe.
I hope John and Aubrey have a safe and exciting trip this weekend and may you have the quiet time with Noah.
Always in my thoughts and prayers! Again, thank you Monica.
Becky L. Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
GAYLORD, MN USA - Thursday, September 2, 2004 10:34 AM CDT
Happy First Day of School Aubrey!! I will be thinking of you and praying you have a super fun day and meet many friendly kids. May God bless you always.
Love, Mary
Mary Akagi <b.akagi@worldnet.att.net>
Maple Grove, MN - Wednesday, September 1, 2004 8:34 PM CDT
Hi Paquette's,
So glad that the kids had a good time at Arrowwood, and I hope you and John were able to enjoy yourselves as well. We are heading up there at the end of the month, so I'm glad to hear that it is worth the trip. I am sorry that it hurts so badly to see other children Gabbie's age. To you, she will always be that precious little girl who was taken much too soon. I know that seeing little girls will be difficult for the rest of your earthly life. Praise the Lord that one day you will be reunited with her! Thank you for sharing Jesus with so many.
Love,
Jen Buckentine and family
~ Zachary's Page ~ <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Wednesday, September 1, 2004 12:15 AM CDT
Dear Monica,
Wishing Aubrey a good first day of school on Thursday.
Just wanted to let you know I care about you and your family so very much--and always will.
My prayers and support always,
Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime31@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Tuesday, August 31, 2004 11:25 PM CDT
Monica,
Welcome home! Ohhhhh, your line about aching each time you saw a child Gabbie's age just resonated in my heart. I felt the same way when we were at the state fair yesterday. May sweet Jesus wrap his arms around your heart and send you his peace that surpasses all understanding. We're praying for you!!!!
Love,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Monday, August 30, 2004 1:49 PM CDT
Hey Monica-
Just checking in. Hope you guys are having a great weekend. I also want to thank you, Monica. I can't tell you enough how much I appreciate it!! :) I just got all teary eyed. . . thank you.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
Gaylord, MN USA - Sunday, August 29, 2004 2:24 PM CDT
Hi Monica,
I'm so glad you and the kids had a nice time on your vacation.
Although I can only imagine how much your heart did indeed break when you saw kids that were Gabbie's age..I am so very sorry for that.
The picture of Noah is so cute. I see so much of Gabbie in him..
Sending my love and prayers your way.
Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Friday, August 27, 2004 10:31 PM CDT
Monica and family-
I hope you have a good trip. I love the pictures!!
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
Gaylord, MN USA - Monday, August 23, 2004 9:28 PM CDT
Monica,
I actually like the 2nd picture on your album. It seems so symbolic that you're facing the cross (and rosary) on the door and holding your little Gabbie. What a cross her earthly death is! We continue to pray for your broken hearts and hope that you enjoy a week out of town.
Love and God bless,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <WeLoveTeesa@earthlink.net; www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose>
St. Paul, MN United States - Sunday, August 22, 2004 2:48 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
I've always thought that Noah resembled Gabbie so much. I will be praying for you to have a wonderful trip and return home safely. God bless always.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
- Friday, August 20, 2004 8:53 PM CDT
Monica,
I just love all the pictures you put up of Gabbie. She looks like a little princess in her red wagon, a holy little princess of God's kingdom. Even in her suffering, she still looks so very peaceful. What grace God gave her (and you) to endure the awful cancer.
Thank you again for having us over on Sunday! We always enjoy our time w/you guys and it is such a pleasure to mutually share about our children, grieving and faith. You are special to me!!!!!
Love and God bless,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Friday, August 20, 2004 3:49 PM CDT
Just thought I would give you a quick note to tell you that I hope your vacation goes well and the weather holds out for you. I know that grief is a part of every moment of your life and therefore, I know your grief will be with you on vacation. I hope that you will still have some wonderful moments with John, Noah, and Aubrey and that you will make some lasting memories. I think of Gabbie and all the "Caringbridge Kids" every day. When someone thinks they have it bad...I always remind them, and myself, it could be worse. Hope your vacation goes as good as can be expected.
Rhonda Meyer <rschultz@scl.doc.state.mn.us>
- Wednesday, August 18, 2004 1:03 PM CDT
Just stopping by to say I'm thinking of you.. always.
My heart goes out to you so much for how much you miss precious Gabrielle.
Lots of prayers from the heart continue for you,
Love Always,
Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Tuesday, August 17, 2004 10:16 PM CDT
Dear Gabbie's Family,
First time to sign, but not the first time viewing Gabbie's page. She is beautiful and precious. Thank you for sharing words and they can encourage and comfort many other of us.
We are thankful to God for having the Clyde's family be with your family to walk together. We pray the peace, comfort, and strength from God continue to be with all of us. Send your family with our love and prayers.
(www.caringbridge.org/oh/esther)
Benjamin, Paulina, Erin (Forever Family with Esther) <Mercy2Live@yahoo.com>
Dayton, OH US - Tuesday, August 17, 2004 5:05 PM CDT
Hi Monica,
Thank you for sharing Ben's website. I have been there in the past, but not recently. Bill and I sat here and read their recent updates and looked at the adorable photos of Ben. Our hearts are breaking for their family. But I'm thankful for their faith. Even as their hearts are breaking, they remind us that God has a plan for Ben and that God is good. You are right, God's plan for these little ones will not be foiled.
Also, thank you for sharing Aubrey's rendition of Psalm 23. That is wonderful! You must be so proud of her! We too missed you at Luis Palau - we looked and looked by Veggie Tales, but there were so many people and the place was so spread out. We had a good time though!
Keeping you and your family in my prayers tonight.
Love,
Jen Buckentine
Zachary's Site <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Monday, August 16, 2004 9:48 PM CDT
hi monica
your note on grief completely hit the nail on the head.al we truly want is for everyone to remember our children that passed away.
you had a picture of gabbie a few days ago laying on the bed with her hands behind her head .. i loved it ,i thought it was beautiful , she just looked like she didnt have a care in the world. anyhow thinking of you and as always my thoughts are with you
abbie «♥Angel Mitchell♥»
<afraser1@tru.eastlink.ca>tru, ns canada - Monday, August 16, 2004 5:13 PM CDT
Monica,
I come to your site daily to get inspiration. I visit many other Caringbridge sites as well. This one is not a Caringbridge site but this family NEEDS prayers for little Ben. He has a brain tumor - treatment has not worked. They are praying for a miracle and are full of faith. Please visit their site and say some prayers.
http://www.bens-story.com/pages/9/index.htm
They are close with little Hanna who passed away last week.
God Bless,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshzb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Saturday, August 14, 2004 7:40 PM CDT
Monica,
Aubrey is such a good little evangelizer and memorization queen! Way to go, Aubrey :). We look forward to hearing her rendition in person on Sunday!
Thank you for continuing to post sites where children need prayers. It is one more way we all become the body of Christ...praying together for the will of God and for all the miracles of healing that we know he wants to do.
Love and God bless,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <WeLoveTeesa@earthlink.net; www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose>
St. Paul, MN United States - Friday, August 13, 2004 2:56 PM CDT
Psalm 23 is so precious--thank you for sharing Miss Aubrey's rendition. It reminds me of how often we have childish notions and think we are in complete control (my staff and my rod comfort me), but our all knowing and loving Father continues to hold our hand, using His rod and His staff to direct until we grow in understanding. I smile when I see how you are spending spiritual time with Aubrey and how she is responding and forming her bond with Jesus :^D. We know you will do the same with Noah. And we know that you yearn to have that time with Gabbie but also know that she is forming her bond with Jesus face to face, and we rejoice in that for her sake. May you find yourself being led this week into those green pastures that only He can lead us to and may you find restoration each and every day.
Hugs, your sister in Christ--melody
M A Bell
Baltimore, MD - Friday, August 13, 2004 10:14 AM CDT
Hi Monica,
I have been praying for a miracle for Jordan. I will continue.
I think of you daily and know that your trial is lifelong. Anyone who has lost a child would grieve the rest of their life. To not recognize that would to me be ignoring that their child ever existed.
Gabbie has touched so many of us. That I am grateful for. I just wish she was here with you.
God Bless!
Hugs,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Friday, August 13, 2004 10:10 AM CDT
Hello,
Thanks so much for your message on the passing of our daughter,Brianna. Brianna has a sister named Gabby. Your Gabby is now playing with my Brianna and it is comforting to know that she has such a precious playmate. Again, thanks for your words of comfort and the link to Brianna's site.
May the Lord Bless and Keep you always.
Barbara - Brianna's Mom <bfreed2@hotmail.com>
Dover, De - Friday, August 13, 2004 6:25 AM CDT
Thinking of all of you and your beautiful angel. Sending prayers of comfort and peace.
Terry Snyder (Angel Jalen's "Am-Maw") http://www.caringbridge.org/fl/jalen <vix207@aol.com>
Royal Palm Beach, FL - Thursday, August 12, 2004 8:45 AM CDT
I have been silently visiting your site for more than a year, and have grown in faith each time I visit. I'm sure C.S. Lewis had no idea how God would use his expressions of grief to comfort so many people, so many years later and I suspect the same will be said of you and your precious baby's journal, many years from now people will be comforted by these writings.God is using you greatly.
Dixie Bly <Dixiebly@aol.com>
Boiling Springs, SC USA - Wednesday, August 11, 2004 6:12 AM CDT
Dear Monica,
Yes, of course Gabbie's death matters, but even more important is her life, be it short, it mattered most! It is amazing to me how such a quiet, somber child could have reached so many people, while she was alive, but possibly even more so after her death. Her question to you of "will you be dere" has touched so many people, and I have to believe has convicted at least one heart, if not many, to search in their own hearts the desire to answer that question for themselves. I pray for you daily, and I pray that Gabbie's site that you so prayerfully update will plant the necessary seed(s) to encourage the lost to search for the Truth. There is NO doubt that Gabbie's life mattered, only a fool would say that it didn't, so of course her death mattered too. My heart aches for you as you live each day without Gabbie here with you on earth, but my heart also rejoices for you because of the salvation you have claimed through Jesus Christ assures you to be dere with her again someday.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Wednesday, August 11, 2004 2:32 AM CDT
Death does matter Monica... What a crazy world that such an idea would need to be argued. Praise God for giving us these children to love and hold, even if but for a very short while. Sending you love and praying for strength...
Ivy Ervin *Forever Missing Lukie* <ivymeadows@earthlink.net http://caringbridge.org/oh/lukeervin>
Mansfield, - Tuesday, August 10, 2004 9:06 PM CDT
Hey there. Bear with me. I haven't forgotten. Thank you so much for being so willing to help. I'll get back to you by the end of August. Also just wanted to let you know thatyou remain continually in my thoughts and prayers. Blessings and love in Christ.
Khalita My Caringbridge Site Duke Peds BMT Aplastic Anemia <khalita@hecaresonline.org>
Lexington, NC, - Tuesday, August 10, 2004 4:28 PM CDT
Hello my friend, You're not alone; I have several things I just can not do ever again. Everything is different now, isn't it? I'm so glad you all made it to the festival, and the weather was good. It was a beautiful weekend here; amazing for August! Glenn and I spent Sat. afternoon in Babies R Us... registering! :) We weren't the only 'old' people there either!!! Hope you have a good week. With love
jan livingstone (Andy's Mom forever)
- Tuesday, August 10, 2004 3:21 AM CDT
Dear Monica,
Hope you had a wonderful weekend at the festival.
Debbie Nagy
- Monday, August 9, 2004 5:35 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
Thinking of you and Gabbie today. I bet those wagon rides were the highlight of her days in the hospital.
God bless,
Michelle
Michelle Rice <michelle.rice@gpmlaw.com>
Forest Lake, MN - Monday, August 9, 2004 2:51 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
I hope you have a great time at the Luis Palau Festival!
It sounds wonderful!!
Good for Aubrey on memorizing Psalm 23! Bless her sweet little heart! And what a beautiful thing to memorize!
Love and prayers always, and ~truly~ missing dear Gabbie with you..Although I never met her, I honestly love her too.
Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Sunday, August 8, 2004 1:00 AM CDT
Monica,
Here's another caring bridge family that is in a desperate race for time w/one of their newborns in need of a heart transplant. Please keep babies Jack and Cooper in your prayers!
www.caringbridge.org/mn/corboboys
Love,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Saturday, August 7, 2004 1:07 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
I'm so sorry that I've been lax in signing in on the guest book recently. Please don't take that to mean that I have forgotten about you or about Gabbie. I think of you and pray for you all the time. I hope that you enjoy the Wedding and Festival this weekend!
Thank you for always sharing Jesus so openly on your site- that encourages my heart!
Loving and Missing Gabbie with You!
With my Love,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Friday, August 6, 2004 7:28 PM CDT
Bless y'all. <3. Love you.
XoXoXo
Cynthia
http://www.caringbridge.org/fl/littlewarriors
Cynthia <Cynthia52889@msn.com>
Miami, FL USA - Friday, August 6, 2004 10:40 AM CDT
Monica - I'm going to the festival on Sunday too. My Noah has a little friend's birthday party until 3:30 pm - but we're planning on heading down after that. I love the music of Third Day and Casting Crowns - so am so excited. My 13 year old is excited about the extreme sports - and Noah is excited about Veggietales. I look forward to so many people come together in one place to give glory to God. It would be so fun to run into you guys! We also have a wedding on Saturday - ours is in St. Cloud - I have a sitter - but of course have nothing to wear yet. I'm not very organized sometimes either.
I did visit Celeste's site earlier this week and took notice of the May 17 date. I think of Gabbie often, and come here to see her beautiful little face daily.
Love,
Mari Beth Ross <jerryandmaribethross@comcast.net>
Hugo, MN - Thursday, August 5, 2004 9:45 PM CDT
Found you through sharethelove.org
My son has Neuroblastoma, diagnosed Aug 2003
He has a website with a page of Warriors... may I add your Angel gabrielle?
www.beebo.info
Kelly Rendall <atomicblonde@tsilatnem.eclipse.co.uk>
Teignmouth, Devon United Kingdom - Thursday, August 5, 2004 8:41 PM CDT
Monica--just stopping by to say hello and to see how you all are doing. Thank you for the mention of Jackson, and of the new baby Krysten. She is doing well and growing quickly. Another special addition to the family. I think of you daily, and stop by here often..although I don't always sign in to let you know, you are a special friend to me! God bless you.
Love, Michelle <eaglet@cltcomm.net>
Clear Lake, WI - Thursday, August 5, 2004 5:19 PM CDT
Hi Monica,
Are you going to Luis Palau Festival?? We will be there on Sunday!! If you are going we should plan to meet. I love the picture of Gabbie and John. He is such a good dad - so caring and so loving. Thinking about Gabbie today and how her life and death has touched so many lives and I know is bringing people to Jesus. Hope you are having a good day and enjoying this beautiful weather.
Love,
Jen Buckentine
Zachary's Site <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Thursday, August 5, 2004 7:12 AM CDT
What a beautiful site and tribute to Gabbie, the "will you be dere" site. God bless you all and keep it up!
Dianne Goings <dianneg@integraonline.com>
Prior Lake, - Wednesday, August 4, 2004 10:59 AM CDT
Dear Monica,
I will be saying prayers for sweet Noah this evening, that his fever be gone, and he feel better very, very soon. God bless you always.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Monday, August 2, 2004 7:51 PM CDT
Good afternoon Monica! Thinking of you all while sweltering in the NC heat & humidity. Even the pool is not refreshing this time of year, it feels more like bath water. Most of all, thinking of your precious Gabrielle who we could never, would never forget. How such a solemn precious little girl and her special Mama could touch the heart of a stranger, was certainly meant to be. I do wish that I could have gotten the opportunity to "meet" you under different circumstances but we are given the assurance that we will meet in heaven, the best way! Take care & God bless!
PS - Congratulations on your baptism, another reason I wish you weren't so many miles away. I would have loved to be able to support you in person but I did support you in prayer!
Robin Boger <Robin.Boger@rbc.com>
Lewisville, NC - Monday, August 2, 2004 1:51 PM CDT
Monica,
That is such a precious picture of Gabbie and daddy. It breaks my heart, but is such a beautiful testimony to John's love for his daughter. They look like best buddies, just hanging out and enjoying being with each other. I was just out to Resurrection this a.m. and passed by st. Gabbie's grave. There was a gaggle of geese milling around her grave site area and I could almost picture her laughing and running through the middle of them. Almost. But instead, she is laughing and running amidst the angels. Oh, how we miss her sweet little being here below. I look at her picture every single day and I just love your little girl so much! I can't wait until we're all reunited with her. Bless your broken heart, Monica.
Love,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Monday, August 2, 2004 1:49 PM CDT
HelenH <geordielass999@hotmail.com>
uk, - Monday, August 2, 2004 9:43 AM CDT
Just visiting to see your PRECIOUS face ... loving you in the Lord ... thank you Monica for the amazing strength and courage you have shown to so many ... God Bless
Rebekah Clark A.K.A. Aunt Bekah http://www.caringbridge.org/ny/justyn/ <mommy_jaden@yahoo.com>
Prior Lake, MN USA - Saturday, July 31, 2004 9:36 PM CDT
What a beautiful tribute to your equally beautiful daughter!
Misty <Schiffner4NC@aol.com caringbridge.org/nc/ivymeredith>
Charlotte, NC - Thursday, July 29, 2004 9:30 PM CDT
Several times each day I find my thoughts with you and Gabbie. Riding my bike, especially when I pause at the Angel of Hope Childrens Memorial on my route and say hello to Gabbie, during yoga, when I see any little girl with blond curly hair, when I hear certain songs, at church, and when I tuck my own boys in each night. Gabbie will never be forgotten in my mind, my heart, and my home. May God bless and keep you always. Love, Mary
Mary Akagi <b.akagi@worldnet.att.net>
Maple Grove, MN - Thursday, July 29, 2004 8:12 PM CDT
Thinking of all of you today and remembering Gabbie. Gabbie reminds me so much of my little grandaughter Caitlin. Gabbie will always have a special place in my heart. We will never forget you Gabbie! Jesus cares and I care. Love and Hugs! Barb
Barb www.caringbridge.org/oh/heidi <babogner@earthlink.net>
Mansfield, OHIO USA - Thursday, July 29, 2004 1:55 PM CDT
Dearest Monica,
Not a day goes by that my mind and heart doesn't turn to Gabbie (and your family also). She was an extraordinary bit of heaven on Earth during her too short of stay.
She is forever etched in my mind and heart (and countless others!) and I feel so honored to have gotten to know about her--even though it had to be after she went to be with Jesus. She is very special and has touched many many lives.
When some are silent about her, I can only imagine how that rips a parents heart. I'm so sorry for that for you.
And I know how much you appreciate the people who do let you know they think of Gabbie so often and how she has touched their lives. There are many and please know that I am one!!
Thank you, Monica, for giving us the blessing to know your little girl--she will never be forgotten--instead remembered and honored always--until that glorious day in heaven when we are all rejoined with our Savior!
God Bless You!
Love,
Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Thursday, July 29, 2004 11:39 AM CDT
I think of Gabbie all the time, and I never even met her! I can't imagine how anyone who knew her would not speak of her. I think many people, me included, don't know what to say after someone has lost a child. But, thanks to your journal entries, I now realize that I would do more of a disservice to the family if I didn't talk about their loved one and share my memories of that person. Thank you for educating me on how be a more thoughtful, sympathetic Christian in these situations.
Mary Stein <stein094@umn.edu>
Inver Grove Heights, MN - Thursday, July 29, 2004 8:54 AM CDT
We will never forget Gabbie.
I would guess that it is difficult for some family members to speak of Gabbie as I would guess they miss her too and don't know what to say. God knows what is in everyone's heart and if it is true.
Our prayers continue to be with you and your family.
Jennifer Miles www.caringbridge.org/mn/deemartinson <jennifer.miles@thomson.com>
Minneapolis, MN USA - Thursday, July 29, 2004 8:50 AM CDT
Oh my gosh Monica, how could anyone that ever knew Gabbie or has come to this site ever forget Gabbie. I can only imagine that if family members and friends do not mention her it is because they are uncomfortable with your loss. Maybe I am giving them too much credit and they are just totally thoughtless, but I would hope and pray that it is because they do not know what to say or how to interact with a parent of a deceased child. Let me say that one thing Caringbridge has taught me, among many other things, is to talk about the child that is no longer here on earth. Reading so many sites of parents that just want to hear their child's name mentioned and remembered has taught me to be very sensitive to this. I have also learned that it isn't just about children. Even a 78 year old woman hungers to hear her now deceased husband's name mentioned and stories to be told of him. I lost my father 4 years ago this past Monday to a very tragic accident, and sometimes it is difficult to talk about him to my 78 year old mother, but I make myself do it because Caringbridge and sites like Gabbie's taught me to do so. My mother's eyes just light up and she smiles so big when I talk about my Dad. I will admit, it is hard to do so without crying, but I make myself do it for her sake. I know you have written that many acted as though she did not even exist, so I am not excusing them. Unfortunately, one day one of them will experience something similar in their life, and then they will "get it"...all too late. I am so sorry that they make you feel as though Gabbie is forgotten, but there is no doubt in my mind that Gabbie will never be forgotten. Just look at how many of us she has touched even after she went to heaven. I know with all of my heart Gabbie will never, ever be forgotten.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Wednesday, July 28, 2004 7:41 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
You do not know me, but I have never forgotten Gabbie from the first time I visited your site. I wish I had known her. The American Cancer Society is having their Relay for Life in August, and I am donating a luminaria in memory of Gabbie. I think about her so much. God bless.
Michelle Rice <michelle.rice@gpmlaw.com>
Forest Lake, MN - Wednesday, July 28, 2004 10:41 AM CDT
Monica,
""Then he said to all, "If anyone wishes to come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me." Luke 9:23
I can so relate to your missing Gabbie, although you've been without your precious one longer than me and I know that can only be worse. I'm so very sorry that you have to carry this cross. It hurts. It won't ever stop hurting, because you are never going to forget her. She was (is) such a big part of you! I really cling to Fr. Joseph's words when he said that now there is no separation of sin between us and our children. In a very real spiritual sense they are now closer to us than when they were in our actual arms. (I even hate to write that because although of consolation, it doesn't take away one iota of pain.) I'm so sorry. May God grant you special signal graces that could only be from your beautiful Gabbie! Know that we are holding you tightly in prayer and we cry with you over the loss of sweet little Gabbie.
Much love,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Monday, July 26, 2004 5:19 PM CDT
Monica,
Thank you for sharing that beautiful description of the night sky. Most people are too busy to even stop and appreciate the glory and beauty that only God could have created. Congratulations on your baptism, I did have to smile at the picture you created of John with Noah and Aubrey. I'm sorry I haven't signed in lately, I do check your page several times a week. I pray that you all have a nice, relaxing weekend.
Love, hugs and prayers,
Rhonda Hunley, Connor's Mom
**Connor's page**
<rshunley@comcast.net>
Hendersonville, TN God Bless America and our Troops and Leaders! - Friday, July 23, 2004 10:09 AM CDT
Monica, congratulations on your baptism, although I had to laugh at the thought of Noah probably trying to climb out of your husbands arms with Aubrey had sand flailing everywhere. I am sure its not as bad as you had us envisioning!
Chris ~ Gooch's Site ~
- Tuesday, July 20, 2004 10:38 PM CDT
Hi Monica,
I know how frustrating those temper tantrums can be..Both Jenny and Daniel when they were younger went through a bad bout of those..(frequency and intensity) and isn't it so much fun when you are at the grocery store and they are having a complete and irrational fit? (smile)
Thankfully I also remember so many times there were other moms there (strangers) who gave me such a understanding glance,and would even try to distract my screaming child for me in the hopes of calming them down. That was so much apprecited and made me feel so much better. :o)
Anyway, I had to smile when you mentioned Noah's tantrums becasue I remember going through that too.
Your jorunals always touch my heart and I think about you and pray for you every single day--and more than once.
As well as the families you mention on your site..they are all in my hearts and prayers as well.
God Bless
Love Always,
Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Tuesday, July 20, 2004 6:59 PM CDT
Monica,
Thank you for honoring Theresa today, and so many other days, via your website. We are sad, but peaceful today. I know both Gabbie and Theresa are helping us through this most difficult time.
Thank you for your love and prayers, you are a very special momma and a very special friend.
God bless you and love,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <WeLoveTeesa@earthlink.net; www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose>
St. Paul, MN United States - Tuesday, July 20, 2004 3:53 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
My computer was not working for about a week and then it was working only off and on. My prayer for you is that your baptism was a meaningful experience, one indicating an act of obedience to our Lord and a profession of faith to those who witnessed it. I have no doubt that it was all of these things that I have mentioned. May God continue to bless you each and every day as you are a shining example of His love in all that you do to glorify Him.
In His love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Monday, July 19, 2004 11:00 PM CDT
Hi Monica,
How wonderful that you were baptized and that John, Aubrey and Noah could be there to witness it. I'm glad that you were able to go to Theresa's memorial service. It really sounds like Cathy and Nate were so very grateful for having everyone there that day and sharing so many memories of Theresa. Thank you for the note you sent - it brightened my day!
I loved your last couple journal entries, reminding us that our beautiful children have served a beautiful purpose in the short time they were here with us. God will not make there suffering worthless. And that maybe part of God's plan is that they were to be spared a long life in this world that seems to be going further away from God every day. Our children are in the very presence of Jesus!
Love,
Jen Buckentine
Zachary's Site <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Monday, July 19, 2004 9:45 PM CDT
Monica, I'm so glad you were with Cathy and Nate on Saturday. They both seemed to be cherishing their moment of parenting with their friends. You and Cathy share as mothers something I can never fully understand. As close as I can come, is underdstanding God's love for us as His children.
Two years ago I slammed the door on Emma's finger and broke her middle knuckle. I felt terrible for the pain I inflicted on my daughter. On the way home, I had a better appreciation for the cross. What I had done to my child was an accident. God chose for His Son to suffer on purpose, as the only way to restore sinful people to himself. God did something he didn't have to do! And that is what makes the gift of salvation so tremendously beautiful. It is a gift marrinated in love.
I'm so glad I could meet Gabbie though this site. I will meet her again in the full likeness of Christ. Not because of what I have done, but because of what Jesus has done for me. And I know that you will be united with her as well because you have made a decision to recieve this free gift that God offers.
Dan Baier
God offers His free gift of everlasting life to everyone. But not everyone has taken possession of it. If you are uncertain in any way if your crimes against a Holy God have been forgiven, all you have to do to begin a relationship with the creator of the universe is ask Him to show himself to you. Admit your faults, believe that Jesus paid the full penalty for your wrongs (the best you know how), and ask Jesus to be both your savior and leader of your life. Pray that right now. You have everything to gain, and nothing to lose.
Dan Baier <dbaier@mn.rr.ocm>
Minnetonka, Mn - Monday, July 19, 2004 11:03 AM CDT
hi monica
i like to think that mitch has met all these wonderful children.part of me wants to think that mitch is having so much fun in heaven he has no time to be sad because he misses me and on the other hand im so scared that mitch has forgotten me. i just want mitch happy , my pain will heal in time not heal be more easy to cope with.
Love abbie «♥Angel Mitchell♥» <afraser1@tru.eastlink.ca>
- Sunday, July 18, 2004 10:06 AM CDT
Im sending all my love to you all,
Love
Viks
viks <viks@postpals.co.uk>
- Saturday, July 17, 2004 12:28 AM CDT
Monica,
I'm crying thinking of Gabbie and Theresa together in heaven. Do they know how much their mommies (and daddies) hurt? May they send us extra hugs and kisses today. I'm SO VERY happy that you're able to come be with us today, thank you for honoring my little saint. May it also be a time to remember her saintly friend, Gabbie and all other babies that left us much too quickly.
Much love to you,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <WeLoveTeesa@earthlink.net; www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose>
St. Paul, MN United States - Saturday, July 17, 2004 11:17 AM CDT
Monica--I haven't signed in a while but want to say that I am still keeping up with you on your journey. I leave for my missions trip to Guadalajara tomorrow morning...I first wrote to you two years ago before going to serve at the same place. There won't be any blue-eyed blonde (Gabby IS such a cutey), but Jesus loves these children, too!
God's Word is amazing...it always speaks to us and our need. I love that it "comforts the afflicted and afflicts the comfortable." May we always have hearts willing to hear what He says and act on it!
Love and prayers--Melody
Melody Bell
Baltimore, PA - Friday, July 16, 2004 5:05 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
The verse from Isaiah is a very special one for me. My mom brought it to my attention after Steve passed away, and we discussed it at great length in her own final days. My mom tried so very hard to understand why Steve left us at such a young age, and this Bible verse helped her (and myself) a great deal.
As always, we are thinking of your family and are glad that Aubrey had such a good time while she was away. We remember Gabbie always.
Happy Birthday to John!
Love, Janine
J. Nielsen
Coon Rapids, MN - Friday, July 16, 2004 3:54 PM CDT
My Dearest Monica,
Just thinking of you and thinking of Gabbie today! I'm so sorry as always that she's not here with you on earth. I'm thankful for the promise of Jesus that you WILL be reunited in Heaven, but I know that doesn't lessen your pain right now!
Loving and Missing Gabbie with you!
All my Love,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@Insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Friday, July 16, 2004 4:25 AM CDT
Monica,
I love her faint little smile, she looks so peaceful and wise. God truly gifted her in special ways while she was on this earth and now while she's in heaven patiently waiting for her momma to come join her.
Thank you for coming this Saturday, it will be good to pray and cry with you :).
Love,
Cathy & st. Theresa Rose <WeLoveTeesa@earthlink.net>
St. Paul, mN United States - Wednesday, July 14, 2004 10:55 AM CDT
Hello Monica and Saint Gabbie ... I have been thinking about LIFE in geneal these past few days and it has helped me put things in perspective. Why some children suffer and others don't ... well THAT I still don't have the answers for but I trust in the Lord so very much and believe that there is a purpose and that we will know when our time is right ... thank you for praying for Justyn ... it is amazing how strong the prayers have been from all over the country ... I am ever so faithful in his recovery and I thank you for your friendship and for your knowledge in the Lord ... you are a wonderful person and I can't wait to one day meet you! As always I am missing Gabbie with you and wanting to hold her so ... sorry as always that we can't!
God Bless,
Rebekah
www.caringbridge.org/ny/justyn
Rebekah Clark <mommy_jaden@yahoo.com>
Prior Lake, MN - Tuesday, July 13, 2004 6:37 PM CDT
Hi Monica,
Here is the link to Zoie
http://www.caringbridge.org/la/zoie/
Hope you are doing well today.
Hugs,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Tuesday, July 13, 2004 9:54 AM CDT
Monica~
I am so happy to hear about Sunday and your plan to affirm your faith in Jesus Christ through baptism! I would love to be there to share in the day with you, as it will be so special. :) God called me as well in 1997 and I also was baptized, on Easter 2000.
We have so many common threads and I am so thankful that God has led us to be friends through our children.
Love to you always.
Jackson's mom, Michelle
- Monday, July 12, 2004 9:18 PM CDT
Hi Monica,
I think of you and your family every single day and pray for you every single day. You and Gabbie are very near and dear to my heart...
Love to you,
Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Friday, July 9, 2004 8:49 PM CDT
We will think about you and John and Noah and Gabbie as we head to the lake tomorrow.
I am sure Aubrey is in great hands with Sarah and will have a great time.
Hugs
Jennifer Yseth <j.yseth@mchsi.com>
Brookings, SD - Friday, July 9, 2004 2:16 PM CDT
Monica,
Thank you for asking for extra prayers for our family with it being Luke's birthday yesterday. God was merciful and the day wasn't as bad as I feared. I KNOW Luke is blissfully happy up in heaven, moreso than he certainly would be down here! We love you all, dear friends. Some day we shall meet and dance together on the streets of heaven!
Ivy Ervin - * Forever Missing Luke* <ivymeadows@earthlink.net http://caringbridge.org/oh/lukeervin>
Mansfield, Ohio - Friday, July 9, 2004 9:15 AM CDT
Hello Monica,
Thank you for relating the story of a child's great faith. May mine be half as strong.....Love, Kathy
Kathy Welch <abbysmamaa@yahoo.com>
Lexington, Ohio - Wednesday, July 7, 2004 8:17 PM CDT
Monica,
Just a quick note to say "hi" and that I've been thinking of you....we did "something" to our computer and lost alot of info, including most of my favorites that I had bookmarked. It was by the grace of God that I was able to backtrack and find everybody once again. I've tried to catch up w/your entries because you always seem to get me thinking. It seems so easy during the summer to drift away from the things that keep us anchored, so a gentle nudge is always nice to get me refocused. Hope the mosquitoes aren't drawing too much blood over your way, it's been a wierd, wet, and cold summer here, but God is good, always. Thinking of you my friend.....
Christy <calee59@wi.rr.com>
S. Milwaukee, WI - Wednesday, July 7, 2004 8:04 PM CDT
we found your link
from Connor's page.
what a beautiful
angel!!!!
what a perfect
website
sending you lots of love
craig, lauren, and helen
CRAIGGY
helen <trula1@comcast.net>
- Tuesday, July 6, 2004 4:08 PM CDT
Monica,
I hope you and your family had a nice Independence Day :). I couldn't help but think of our girls as I watched the awe on children's faces watching the fireworks. I guess our earthly awe is nothing compared to the heavenly awe our children are experiencing right now?. Oh how we miss them!
Praying for you and especially for your Thursday at church! I'm so inspired by your continual growth in faith!
Love,
Cathy & st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Tuesday, July 6, 2004 1:32 PM CDT
HELLO, This is my first visit to Gabbie's web page. I want to read all of your past journals. Gabbie so reminds me of my dear little grandaughter Caitlin. I wish I had some wonderful words to add to your guestbook but I don't. I will be back to visit you again. I live in Luke Ervin's hometown and I am friends with his mother, Ivy.
Keep strong and please continue to journal. Jesus loves you and I love you. Barb
Barb www.caringbridge.org/oh/heidi <babogner@earthlink.net>
Mansfield, OHIO USA - Monday, July 5, 2004 3:41 PM CDT
Hello dear friend,
We are busy applying Bactine to Abigail's many mosquito bites. I am not absolutely convinced that mosquitos were necessary on the ark, but as with everything else, God knows best!! (Same for spiders!) Love to all the Paquette family from Ohio, Kathy
Kathy Welch <abbysmamaa@yahoo.com>
Lexington, Ohio - Monday, July 5, 2004 2:37 PM CDT
Have a safe and happy Fourth!
Love, hugs and prayers,
Rhonda Hunley, Connor's Mom
**Connor's page**
<rshunley@comcast.net>
Hendersonville, TN
My Dearest Monica,
I'm so glad that little Noah is feeling better. Thank you as always for sharing Jesus so well! You are an amazing Missionary and I'm honored to call you my friend.
I'm sorry that Gabbie isn't here too. I know that she is in the presence of Jesus, but it doesn't make you miss her any less here on earth. You grieve with HOPE but you grieve just the same. I love you Monica and I love Gabbie so much and I can't WAIT for the chance to hug her in Heaven!!
With All of my love,
Heather
Loving and Missing Gabbie with you!
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus , Ohio - Friday, July 2, 2004 8:35 PM CDT
Hi Monica,
I'm glad little Noah is feeling better from Monday.
Yes, the misquitos sure are bad this year--my kids are sporting those welts too left by those nasty little buggers.
By the way, thank you for your well wishes in the guestbook on the birth last week of my daughter-I appreciated it.
As always, you guys are in my heart,thoughts and prayers.
God Bless You.
Love in Christ,
Sara
www.caringbridge.com/mn/danielhammer <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Wednesday, June 30, 2004 10:30 PM CDT
Hi Monica,
Just checking in.....thinking of you daily.
If you didn't know already, little Paige passed away this morning.
http://www.paigerutter.com
I am so sad.
Hugs,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Wednesday, June 30, 2004 2:53 PM CDT
Hey Monica! It is perfectly understandable that you would covet NC weather! I might too if I didn't live here :) I must admit, I do NOT covet Minnesota weather. I have no idea how you guys get through winter there. I think I'd be going nuts with so much snow. We get just enough here. And, if we want to see lots of snow, go skiing, etc. the NC ski resorts are only 2 hrs away! I am sorry to have to ask this but I would be delighted to send you more addresses...if you could let me know who you've already sent to. I think I have an entire list, but unfortunately, I cannot locate the individual addresses I gave you last time. If you aren't sure, no worries. I'll just send you a bunch more and you'll recognize the ones you've already sent to. I'm so glad you're ready for more. God's timing is always perfect. I truly believe that. And, I thank you for the blessing that you are in working with me on this mission of the Lord. Take your time getting back to me. I will be gone July 11-27 so, it'll have to be before or after that--whichever is better for you ok? Sorry I've been so slow in getting to you but you are constantly in my thoughts and prayers. I love you my friend. Blessings in Christ.
Khalita My Caringbridge Site Duke Peds BMT Aplastic Anemia <khalita@hecaresonline.org>
Lexington, NC - Tuesday, June 29, 2004 2:17 PM CDT
My Dearest Monica,
You my friend inspire ME! You have used your deep hurt and grief to share Jesus so openly with others. It challenges me to be more open with my faith! I'm glad your time with Aubrey was enjoyable.
I wish dearly I could have come and run with you and Cathy in memory of Gabbie. Please know that I think of her and you often!
With All my Love in Christ,
Heather
Loving and Missing Gabbie with you!
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Monday, June 28, 2004 9:09 PM CDT
Monica,
YOU are an inspiration to us!!!!!!!!!!!! We are humbled by your brave proclaimation of Jesus and all that he does in your life!!!!!!!! We are all on this faith walk together and you truly edify our spirits in ways that you'll never know. It was a very special time to run with you on Saturday. How I wish our girls could have been physically with us...our tears are testimony to the great beauty of their short little lives.
Love and God bless you always,
Cathy & st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Monday, June 28, 2004 9:43 AM CDT
Hi Monica,
It's been a while since I've visited, and once again, your page has left me inspired and hopeful. I hope your 5k went well today.
Lori Noah's Page <clowns@myhometown.net>
n st paul, mn - Sunday, June 27, 2004 0:38 AM CDT
Hi Monica,
Just thinking about you today. What an adorable picture of Aubrey and Gabbie. I am sad that Aubrey will not get to see her sister grow up.
I hope you and Aubrey have a good time at the hotel this weekend and that your 5K with Cathy goes well, even if slow. Thank you for continuing to fight the good fight and win hearts for Jesus.
Love,
Jen, Bill, Brady and Saint Zachary
Zachary's Site <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Friday, June 25, 2004 10:08 PM CDT
Monica, thank you for always putting words to what we are feeling. I must totally agree (sadly) with you about your note on grief tonight. Why, indeed! You are sending your riches on to heaven, I can assure you... With love, hugs and continued prayers...
Ivy Ervin - * Forever Missing Luke* <ivymeadows@earthlink.net http://caringbridge.org/oh/lukeervin>
Mansfield, Ohio - Friday, June 25, 2004 8:24 PM CDT
Thinking about you today and everyday. I hope you and your family have a great weekend.
Shannon Hujanen <hujanenfamily@mcleodusa.net>
Blaine, MN USA - Friday, June 25, 2004 12:35 AM CDT
Monica,
I'm tearfully looking forward to our 5k tomorrow and am glad that it will be a slowwwwwww run for both of us :). If only our little girls could be physically present with us...but instead they'll be in our hearts and souls. We run in their memory and run for great love of them.
Love and God bless you,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Friday, June 25, 2004 11:15 AM CDT
Dear Monica and Aubrey,
Have a marvelous time on your hotel trip.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Thursday, June 24, 2004 6:57 PM CDT
Dearest Monica,
Just thinking of you today. Praying for you! I hope your run on Saturday is enjoyable and that you enjoy your time with Cathy- I know she is very special to you! Please know that I think of you and your sweet Gabbie very often!!
Loving and Missing Gabbie with you!
Love in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@Insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Thursday, June 24, 2004 6:07 PM CDT
Deep in my heart I believe, but I will admit that I do question things. I question why any child has to die and how are they chosen? Why one person experiences very little loss in their life and others seem to get much more than their fair share. I go to church regularily but I am a little turned off by the fact that money seems to be a constant theme. Religions are all so different, who's right? Just because they are priests, does that mean they know for sure? I hope I am not offending any of the long time strict Catholics out there. I was Lutheran and converted to Catholic when I got married and asked the same questions of the Lutheran faith. We are all God's children but if you are not Catholic you cannot take communion in their churches. Isn't that like saying they are not good enough to break bread with us, because they are not Catholic? Maybe I question more the religious rules (for lack of a better term) than I do God. Thanks for always giving me one more thing to think about:) I'm sorry to hear that Father's Day was a tough day for you. As always you and Gabbie are still in our prayers, nightly.
Rhonda Meyer <rschultz@scl.doc.state.mn.us>
- Wednesday, June 23, 2004 10:34 AM CDT
Thinking of you and praying for you today as always. I know this is not an easy day for John with his precious Gabbie gone from this earth. I am thankful that he is the kind of man that teaches his children who their true Father is. God bless always.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Sunday, June 20, 2004 3:33 PM CDT
Thinking of your family today and every day--with love, support and prayer.
God Bless You All..
The Hammer's
www.caringbridge.com/mn/danielhammer <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Sunday, June 20, 2004 11:38 AM CDT
"Everyone who believes that Jesus is the Christ is begotten by God, and everyone who loves the father loves also the one begotten by him. In this way we know that we love the children of God when we love God and obey his commandments." 1 John 5:1-2
Happy father's day to John! Thank you, John, for being a loving and holy example to all fathers. You easily could have given up and grown bitter after Gabbie's earthly death, but instead you chose to go on and live in the hope of Christ. St. Gabbie must be so very proud of her papa.
Have a wonderful weekend and know of our prayers for you,
Nate & Cathy Clyde <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn usa - Friday, June 18, 2004 6:17 PM CDT
My Dear Friend Monica,
Just thinking of you today! Praying for you! I know your journey through Gabbie's death is a fiery trial one on one would ever, ever choose. Thank you for your sharing and honesty. I think of you and of Gabbie so often, she was an amazing little girl, who I can't WAIT to meet in Heaven.
Thanks for your sweet card-so thoughtful of you!
Love to you in Christ,
Heather
Loving and Missing Gabbie with you!
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@Insight.rr.com>
Wish it was closer, Ohio - Thursday, June 17, 2004 4:49 PM CDT
Monica, what precious new pictures of all your little ones. Aubrey & Noah are growing up so fast and of course, sweet Gabbie is beautiful as ever with her sticker. I certainly understand how you would be tempted now more than ever as you have been forced to bear such a heavy cross. Thinking of and praying for you always, God bless.
Robin Boger <Robin.Boger@rbc.com>
Lewisville, NC - Wednesday, June 16, 2004 6:52 PM CDT
Monica,
You always understand. Thank you for your counsel and thank you for your prayers. You truly help Nate and I to carry our cross with your prayers and heartfelt compassion.
God bless you! Know we pray for you and your family every day.
Love,
Cathy & st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Wednesday, June 16, 2004 2:17 PM CDT
What an excellent commentary about attacks by Satan. The bible talks about how demons look on a person and decide how they will attack. You are a sword against them and they are afraid. Lord we pray the blood of Jesus over Monica and her entire family. We ask their protection in all things. Use her voice to spread your salvation. I know there are people who pray for this family daily. We join together and pray a protective hedge around them. Let them grow in wisdom and love and grace to reach the world.
Dianne Goings <dianneg@integraonline.com>
Prior Lake, MN - Wednesday, June 16, 2004 9:32 AM CDT
Monica, Your statements about losing a child and temptations is soooo accurate! My whole world is one BIG crack since losing Lukie.... Jesus IS the only "glue" holding it together. thank you for your continued prayers and friendship. Love and hugs through our tears
Ivy Ervin -** Forever Missing Luke** <ivymeadows@earthlink.net http://www.caringbridge.org/oh/lukeervin>
Mansfield, Ohio - Tuesday, June 15, 2004 8:01 PM CDT
Dearett Monica,
I LOVE the new pictures of all three of your precious children. Aubrey is BEAUTIFUL, Noah is so Handsome and Precious Saint Gabbie, she's GORGEOUS!!
Sorry I haven't signed in a bit- I was on vacation last week with my family at the beach. I thought of you and Gabbie so often as I looked at the beauty of God's creation and thought about the God of the Universe loving us enough to have a realationship with us- AMAZING LOVE- AMAZING GRACE!!!
I love you and I love Gabbie so much!!
With Love and Prayers Always,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@Insight.rr.com>
Columbus , Ohio - Tuesday, June 15, 2004 10:48 AM CDT
Monica,
Stopping by to say hi and say a special prayer for you and your family today. The new pictures of Aubrey and Noah are precious. They are both growing up too quickly! Give it some time, but I predict Gabbie's site will hit 1 million.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Tuesday, June 15, 2004 0:23 AM CDT
What beautiful pictures of the kids. Aubrey is growing into such a beautiful little girl and Noah just reminds me so much of Gabbie in so many ways. He is precious too. Thank you for sharing the pictures with us so we can keep up on the other kids too. I know there is still that feeling that the picture is not complete but being absent from the picture is being present with the Lord. You know that, and yet the loss is still there I know.
Suzanne
Gardner, KS USA - Monday, June 14, 2004 11:10 PM CDT
Hello Monica,
You certainly have three beautiful children! When I look at pictures of Noah, I see Gabbie's eyes.
As I left Keith at the Columbus airport yesterday morning for a week-long business trip, there was a young family with two beautiful girls of about 6 and 8 saying their goodbyes. The tears were evidence that this wasn't a daddy leaving for a short time. As he headed through the security check, I touched the wife on her arm and asked gently what I already knew. She confirmed that her husband is in the military and was leaving for his second tour of duty in Iraq. I told her that he would be in my prayers. His name is Chad. Perhaps those reading Saint Gabbie's guestbook could add this family to their prayers. The war certainly becomes real when you witness the grief and sacrifice of a military family.
Hope all are well. I think of you every day. Love, Kathy
Kathy Welch <abbysmamaa@yahoo.com>
Lexington, Ohio - Monday, June 14, 2004 7:44 PM CDT
Monica,
You write such simple statements on grief, but they are concisely accurate. To love someone who isn't here is the crux of faith and I know how you love both Jesus and Gabbie. You are a faithful momma and a faithful servant of Jesus Christ! Thank you for proclaiming the gospel through your grief, you have touched me as a momma and I am forever grateful for your friendship.
Love to you,
Cathy & st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Monday, June 14, 2004 9:42 AM CDT
Always in my thoughts and prayers!!
Becky Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
Gaylord, MN USA - Saturday, June 12, 2004 7:54 AM CDT
"I know that my Redeemer lives!" Thank you for reiterating that in a simple and clear way...we have a hope, a promise of eternal life with Him because of it. "Oh death, where is your sting?" Let's be honest: we feel a bit of a sting, but in terms of eternity, it has no hold on us...death stings those who are left behind, but the one who dies and goes to be with Him feels no sting, only contentment in the purity of His arms. Thank you Jesus for giving Your life to these children and to all who believe! Though they felt the sting in this life, You now hold them in victory over death and sin. How we look forward to that great meeting in the sky!! Monica, keep revealing the truth to your readers...it isn't always easy, but how God blesses through it!
Love--Melody
Melody Bell
Baltimore, MD - Tuesday, June 8, 2004 1:03 AM CDT
Monica,
It was so good to be w/you and your family on Saturday!!!!!!! What a joy the common union of faith is...God knits us together through his gentle love. We were out at the cemetary yesterday and found Gabbie's grave. What a beautiful stone w/the pure little lamb on it. Yes, Jesus does hold all his precious little ones so close. Gabbie is surely on the very lap of Jesus.
Prayers and love to you,
Cathy & st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Monday, June 7, 2004 2:06 PM CDT
i was on a site that had banners for our precious little ones and your daughters really touched me. My daughter is the same way, she goes thru testing, pokes and prods silently as well. Children are God's gift to us, weather they are here on earth or Angels watching out for us from above. Thru tears of sorrow for your loss I say thank you for sharing your Angel with us. God Bless
Bridget Stull <sherriona@hotmail.com http://www.caringbridge.org/pa/arianna>
PA - Sunday, June 6, 2004 0:30 AM CDT
Hi Monica,
Thank you for stating that the picture is *Noah*--not Gabbie. Of course it is..I don't know why I didn't catch it!
I guess maybe I just assumed since it was on the cover it was Gabbie. Although there is definately a resemblance, when I went back and looked I could tell those were not Gabbie's eyes. Sorry about that! :o)
It is a very darling picture! I love the cute smile under the NUK!!
Thank you for sharing your words/thoughts about the abortion issue. I also do not understand how it is possible to be pro child and pro coice. It breaks my heart that people don't see it for what it really is--I will never understand that--it just seems so clear to me.
I support our local (pro life) Crisis Nursery/Womans Center in our area and it makes me feel good that I may be helping and supporting woman to make another choice, rather than abortion. My daughters school and our church do a lot to support them and it is such a worthwhile cause. Maybe if more people supported or volunteered at pro life places such as these that helped woman(in so many ways!) in these situations experiencing a crisis pregnancy we would see a change in America? I can hope.
Well, thanks again for your thoughts and I'm sorry about getting the pictures mixed up.:o)
I also wanted to let you know that when I woke up this morning I prayed for you and John and how much you miss sweet Gabbie.
(I pray for you often but wanted to let you know anyway. :o)
Love ya,
Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Friday, June 4, 2004 6:47 AM CDT
Hi Monica,
I just wanted to say thank you for continuing to share the Lord with all of us. Yesterday, as I was struggling through a day of work after a long weekend, I went to Gabbie's site and linked to the Oswald Chambers site where I read a few daily devotionals. It was just what I needed at that particular time. Oh how we learn to persevere through our trials. (Just studied James 1:2-3 tonight.) I am sad to learn that Patti Wetterling is prochoice, yet pro child. That certainly does seem like an oxymoron. I'm thinking about you today and every day. God bless you!
Love, Jen Buckentine
Zachary's Site <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Wednesday, June 2, 2004 10:23 PM CDT
It's been WAY too long since I've signed in or called you. I have been keeping up with your entries for the most part though so please know that I'm praying even when I don't have time to sign. You are a dear friend and I love you tremendously--such a blessing. Amen and Amen on the meditation (in fact, I just taught about that at bible study tonight:) And, as for the "where is America going" question...I have two answers that probably sum that up pretty well. America is either...
1)going to Hell in a handbasket
2)nowhere fast
6 in one hand...
I love you Monica. Blessings in Christ.
P.S. we need to get back on our project sometime too--let me know when/if you're ready ok? NO HURRY, I just want to try and plan out some other things around that so we don't get scheduling or budget conflicts.
Khalita My Caringbridge Site Duke Peds BMT Aplastic Anemia <khalita@hecaresonline.org>
Lexington, NC, - Wednesday, June 2, 2004 8:59 PM CDT
Thank you for commenting arout murder by abortion. I surely do not understand that thinking. Thank you for staying the course. You are a light in the darkness. Keep it up. Also, thank you for the sites of other children fighting as Gabbie did. It gives an opportunity to pray. I hate that cancer and I want it defeated.
Dianne <dianneg@integraonline.com>
- Wednesday, June 2, 2004 11:18 AM CDT
Monica:
Thank you for mentioning the judge's ruling on the partial birth abortion act. One thing struck me when I heard it yesterday. There was so much public outcry recently over the prisoner abuse in Iraq (rightfully so) but where is the outcry over people killing babies? I cannot fathom a reason why there isn't.
We recently got a phone call from MN Citizens Concerned for Life, informing us that Patty Wetterling, who recently announced her candidacy for Congress, is prochoice, while her opponent, Mark Kennedy is steadfastly prolife. While I know she's running on the democratic platform, I find it so hard to believe that someone who lost her son to abduction could ever be prochoice. I went out on her website and she says "Everything I do, I do for children.", yet in a Star Tribune article they quoted her saying, "I'm prochoice, but I'm basically prochild.". What? Isn't that an oxymoron?
I hope you don't mind me putting these thoughts in your guestbook. (You can delete it if you wish) But I think it is so important for those voting to know who they are putting in office.
Love the picture of Noah and always thinking of your family and the loss of precious Gabbie.
Love,
Mari Beth Ross <jerryandmaribethross@comcast.net>
Hugo, MN - Wednesday, June 2, 2004 9:33 AM CDT
Monica,
I love the picture of Noah and I love that you put the picture of Jesus w/the child. I still do a double take when I see that child w/Jesus picture. When I had copied that jpeg onto our desktop, I didn't realize that our screensaver defaulted to desktop photos. I left the room and came back to a full screen of Jesus w/the child! I felt so much that it was Jesus w/Theresa and felt it was a signal grace from God.
When you were asking about what to do about helping babies...are you a blood donor? I had a fairly emotional experience about a month ago when I donated. I told them that Theresa had undergone several blood exchanges and had received lots of platelets and that I wanted to donate for someone else to receive the same gift. I wept, but felt it was a very tangible thing to do. Just a thought for you!
God bless you and thank you for continuing to answer God's call! You give amazing witness and are furthering the love of Christ :).
Love,
Cathy & st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Wednesday, June 2, 2004 9:19 AM CDT
Hi Monica,
I did think the picture was Noah, but I had to really look at it closely. I still see a lot of Gabbie in him. I too heard the ruling on partial birth abortion today in San Fransisco and how it was unconstitutional and it sickened me. Thank you for mentioning it on Gabbie's site. I know many will become more aware because you are not afraid to speak out. God will continue to bless you for speaking out against this evil in our country. Blessings to you always. I did remember Gabbie yesterday, as I remembered many of my Caringbridge friends that left this earth way before their time. I know she never fought a war for our country or wore a military uniform, but she fought a battle of another kind. I DO NOT believe Gabbie lost her battle, but she won the ultimate battle. She will live forever, and someday those of us that know Jesus will all "be dere" with her.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Tuesday, June 1, 2004 9:58 PM CDT
Dearest Monica,
I love the picture of Noah! He's such a cutie pie. Just wanted you to know that I was here reading and praying for you. I'm so sorry as always that Gabbie isn't here with you on earth. I know that you miss her deeply and will until you reunite in Heaven.
Please know how much I love you and how much I love Gabbie too!
With all my love,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Tuesday, June 1, 2004 7:26 PM CDT
Just letting you know you are always in my thoughts and prayers!
Becky Harbarth <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
Gaylord, MN USA - Monday, May 31, 2004 5:04 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
Thank you so much for your mention of Connor and his situation. I know that because of it, many MORE prayers will go up for him, and for that, I am most grateful. You have been and continue to be, an encouragement to me with your faith and resilience. Thank you. May you all have a beautiful day today.
Love, hugs and prayers,
Rhonda Hunley, Connor's Mom
**Connor's page**
<rshunley@comcast.net>
Hendersonville, TN God Bless America! - Monday, May 31, 2004 9:16 AM CDT
Hi Monica, Thinking of all of you today as I do every day. May God keep bless you.
Love, Mary
Mary Akagi <b.akagi@worldnet.att.net>
Maple Grove, MN - Monday, May 31, 2004 7:53 AM CDT
Hello, just dropping by to send a hug to you
Love Viks on behalf of everyone at Post Pals
viks <viks@postpals.co.uk>
- Sunday, May 30, 2004 5:06 PM CDT
Hello, just dropping by to send a hug to you
Love Viks on behalf of everyone at Post Pals
viks <viks@postpals.co.uk>
- Sunday, May 30, 2004 5:06 PM CDT
Oh my gosh Noah has gotten so big! He and Audrey are so cute. And Gabbys eyes are absolutely gorgeous in the new picture on the front page.
Chris ~ Gooch's Site ~
- Sunday, May 30, 2004 11:38 AM CDT
Monica,
I love the picture of sweet and smiling Gabbie behind the NUK. Her eyes are even smiling too. A rare occurance by the sounds of it as you have said she mostly had a very solemn and deep expression on her face--which shows in so many of the picures you have so kindly shared with us.
Just wanted to say Hello and let you know that I am here and that I truly do care so much about you and your family.
Gabbie has become so precious to me and is always and forever in my heart and soul. It is a privilege to know about her-she is so very special.
I check the site daily although I don't always sign the guestbook each time-even though I am touched each time I visit.
Love and Prayers,
Sara
www.caringbridge.com/mn/danielhammer <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Sunday, May 30, 2004 10:40 AM CDT
Monica, Thank you for always reminding me you are there, walking the same walk we are on. It still hurts sooooo much. Will we ever *not* fixate on grief??? Thank you for sharing so much of yourself and Gabbie. We love you all!
Ivy Ervin - * Forever Missing Luke* <ivymeadows@earthlink.net http://caringbridge.org/oh/lukeervin>
Mansfield, - Friday, May 28, 2004 9:22 PM CDT
Monica,
Love the new border, but most of all the pictures. Noah is a CUTIE!! I love seeing all of Gabbie's pictures, also, though some are harder to look at, knowing what she was going through. Thank you as always for sharing your journey with us who are still here on earth. We'll just be able to skip that part when we get to heaven! Love, Kathy
Kathy Welch <abbysmamaa@yahoo.com>
Lexington, Ohio - Friday, May 28, 2004 7:12 PM CDT
Dearest Monica,
Just wanted you to know that I was here reading and praying for you! Thank you for sharing your heart and Jesus each and every time you write a journal entry you are AMAZING!! Please tell Aubrey I'm sorry about her snarly hair and I can relate I used to get snarls in mine all of the time when I was younger.
Please know that I think of you and Gabbie many, many times a day! Missing and Loving her with you!
With all my Love,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Friday, May 28, 2004 6:12 PM CDT
Hi Monica and family,
Just stopping by to say Hello!
The photos of Saint Gabbie are so special.
She was extraordinary here on earth and is surely extraordinary in heaven as well!
All my love and prayers always,
Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Thursday, May 27, 2004 8:33 PM CDT
So sorry that your hair got pulled, Aubrey. Ouch! I saw a little girl the other day with her name on her shirt. Her name is Aubrey!! She looked to be about your age, too. Abigail doesn't like it when her mommy or I comb out her tangles, either. Hope the whole Paquete family has a good holiday weekend. Love, Kathy
Kathy Welch <abbysmamaa@yahoo.com>
Lexington, Ohio - Thursday, May 27, 2004 7:59 PM CDT
Monica,
And, the fruit of your marriage is your beautiful children. What a blessing our vocations are, that God would design a perfect way for us to get to heaven and bring others with us. I'm so thankful for the gift of your marriage, it has definitely been an example and strength to all of us. God has been so good to multiply your love for eachother through the many crosses that you carry.
Looking forward to seeing you all!!!!!!!!!!
Love,
Cathy & st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Thursday, May 27, 2004 4:21 PM CDT
Dearest Monica,
Just thinking of you and praying for you today! I love you my dear friend, I'm so sorry that Gabbie isn't here with you on earth- I know you miss her each and every day!
Loving and Missing Gabbie with you!
Love to you,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@Insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Thursday, May 27, 2004 11:22 AM CDT
Hi Monica. I love the new picture of Gabbi that you added . Just wanted to let you know I'm thinking of you. The 19th is Sam's birthday, so I will not be able to meet with you guys. Hopefully July will work. Take Care.
Cathy Rossini <trossini@comcast.net>
IGH, MN - Wednesday, May 26, 2004 6:28 PM CDT
Hi Monica - I found three Doonesbury cartoons w/ Caringbridge references - not sure I get the humor of them all, but here are the links if you or anyone else wants to see them. Did you know Caringbridge was founded and is headquartered here in MN?
http://www.doonesbury.com/strip/dailydose/index.html?uc_full_date=20040522
http://www.doonesbury.com/strip/dailydose/index.html?uc_full_date=20040524
http://www.doonesbury.com/strip/dailydose/index.html?uc_full_date=20040525
Love ya!
Mari Beth <jerryandmaribethross@comcast.net>
Hugo, MN - Wednesday, May 26, 2004 11:55 AM CDT
My Dear Friend Monica,
What a sweet picture of Baby Gabbie- she is soo beautiful. I'm so sorry that you don't have her here with you on earth. I think of you all the time and pray for you too. You are amazing!! Thank you for sharing your heart and Jesus on Gabbie's site!
Loving and Missing Gabbie with you!
With all my love,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Wednesday, May 26, 2004 7:47 AM CDT
Monica, I too love the photo of baby Gabbie. What a precious child!
Thank you for continuing to use your knowledge and experience to bring others closer to God. I saw this Bible verse again recently, and thought of you and Gabbie and who you both are.
"If you try to keep your life for yourself, you will lose it. But if you give your life for me, you will find true life."
Matthew 16:25
Mari Beth Ross <jerryandmaribethross@comcast.net>
Hugo, MN - Tuesday, May 25, 2004 12:10 AM CDT
You are still in my thoughts and prayers.
Jennifer Miles www.caringbridge.org/mn/deemartinson <jennifer.miles@thomson.com>
Minneapolis, MN USA - Tuesday, May 25, 2004 7:48 AM CDT
Hi Monica,
Just thinking about you tonight. What a beautiful picture of baby Gabbie on the home page. I hope you are doing okay. Thank you for sharing Christ with us.
Love,
Jen, Bill, Brady and Saint Zachary Buckentine
Zachary's Site <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Monday, May 24, 2004 8:21 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
I know that May 17th is a day that will forever be etched in all our hearts. I'm sure one cannot describe the pain you feel from Gabby leaving this physical plain. I know that I have not been there for you, but I hope you know that you and your family continue to be in our prayers. I've been reading your journal entries. I have to wonder if Gabby could come back for a brief moment what would she want to convey to you. I don't think you have to listen to anyone's ideas or expectations on grief. I think you should listen to what Gabby would want for you to do. She is the one who is enlightened. Love and healing from all my heart, Anne Yseth Twomey
Anne Twomey <atwomey@austin.rr.com>
Austin, TX USA - Tuesday, May 18, 2004 10:17 PM CDT
I thought of you and prayed for you in the days just before the 17th and even though I didn't get the guest book signed yesterday I was thinking of you all. I know I can't imagine the feeling and loss you have but I do know it is real and that God understands. He loves you and he's in control in spite of the pain of death. Some day even 'death' will be destroyed and that is going to be a wonderful day.
Suzanne
Gardner, KS USA - Tuesday, May 18, 2004 9:47 PM CDT
Dear Monica, I am so very sorry I didn't sign the guestbook on the anniversary...the only excuse I have is that my grief, for both our children, leaves me without words. Andy's birthday was the 16th, he would have been 14. Another milestone and more tears. I agree with you; there is nothing to compare to this horror. I am with you in heart and spirit...even when I don't have the words. Love to you
jan livingstone (Andy's Mom forever)
- Tuesday, May 18, 2004 8:05 PM CDT
Thinking of you and your special Gabbie.
Love,
Natalie Martin-Rak (www.caringbridge.com/fl/lina) <vladanat@comcast.net>
jacksonville, FL - Tuesday, May 18, 2004 6:31 PM CDT
Dear Paquette Family,
I looked at Gabbie's picture numerous times yesterday as I passed by it's special place on our piano, and each time I looked at her sweet face, I felt such a deep sorrow for all of you. I wish with all of my heart that a miracle would have let her stay here with you.
Thinking of you always . . .
Love, Janine
J. Nielsen
Minneapolis, MN - Tuesday, May 18, 2004 1:52 PM CDT
I still think of Gabbie frequently and feel that she is always in my subconscious. Although I never met her, she changed my life forever and, someday, I hope to thank her for making me a better person.
My prayers continue for your family on this tough anniversary.
God bless
Michael <nel23@yahoo.com>
- Tuesday, May 18, 2004 10:53 AM CDT
Monica,
I'm so sorry I didn't get by the page yesterday. I just want you to know that I was thinking of you. Gabbie will always be remembered, as she still inspires to this day...
Love and hugs,
Rhonda Hunley, Connor's Mom
**Connor's page**
<rshunley@comcast.net>
Hendersonville, TN God Bless America and our Troops and Leaders! - Tuesday, May 18, 2004 9:03 AM CDT
Wanted you to know I am thinking of you all on Gabbie's Day. May the peace and love of God sustain you always.
Cathy
Catherine <seckfourangelone.mcnpk@verizon.net>
Upland, CA USA - Monday, May 17, 2004 10:14 PM CDT
Monica, John, Aubrey, St. Gabbie and Noah,
We are thinking of you today and remembered you in our prayers. We will always remember Gabbie. I remember her as a quiet, solemn little girl at the hospital who was content to be in her room or go for stroller rides in the hallway, never making a peep, just going along for the ride. Perhaps she knew that her time here was not long, and so endured it with much grace. May God be with you and give you peace until you see Gabbie again.
Love, Jen, Bill, Brady and Saint Zachary Buckentine
Zachary's Site <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Monday, May 17, 2004 10:02 PM CDT
To St. Gabbie~
Royal Dignity was yours from the day you were born
Psalms 110:3
To Monica,John,Aubrey,St.Gabbie and Noah~
"For those who live in the Lord, never see each other
for the last time" author unknown
God Bless,
Jill
- Monday, May 17, 2004 9:50 PM CDT
Monica, John, Aubrey & Noah - Just wanted to let you know that you are all in my thoughts and prayers today and always. How my heart breaks for this little girl and this family I've never met. God bless you all.
Lisa
St. Cloud, MN - Monday, May 17, 2004 9:13 PM CDT
I come to your site almost daily. I found your site through another child gone too son. I have never signed before but I wanted you to know that I am thinking of you today. I wish I had words...I don't....so I won't even try. Monica, John, Aubrey, and Noah... you all are in my prayers today and always.
Holly <hwebster@bps.fed.k12.mn.us>
Browerville, MN - Monday, May 17, 2004 5:20 PM CDT
I often address my entries to Monica, but today wanted to let John, Aubrey and little Noah know that they too are on my heart and mind. And Gabbie, thank you for teaching me in your humble and solemn way how to be a servant of God. Even from Heaven, beautiful and wise little one, you are bringing others closer to Jesus. I love you!
Mari Beth Ross <jerryandmaribethross@comcast.net>
Hugo, MN - Monday, May 17, 2004 4:43 PM CDT
John, Monica, Aubrey, Noah and Gabbie,
Just wanted to let you know we are still thinking of you, and remember this anniversary.
Mary Kay and family
Mary Kay Knox <DMK542@juno.com>
Brooklyn Park, MN - Monday, May 17, 2004 3:08 PM CDT
Prayers and warm thoughts go out to all of you today. You are never far from our thougts and Gabby's beautiful smile is never far from our hearts.
Leslee, Mark, Andy and Jordan Yseth <lesyse@stfrancis.k12.mn.us>
- Monday, May 17, 2004 3:06 PM CDT
I haven't signed in for a long time, but today, especially today, I wanted to let you know that I am still visiting regularly. Still learning, praying, and remembering a very precious little girl whom I never met, but who changed my life.
Sue
Sue Kirtz <skirtz@lmnc.org>
Apple Valley, MN - Monday, May 17, 2004 3:06 PM CDT
Monica and family-
Just letting you know that I am thinking about you today, on this Anniversary. Please be comforted in knowing that she is rejoicing with the Lord right now and free from pain.
Always in my thoughts and prayers. . .
Becky <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
MN USA - Monday, May 17, 2004 2:42 PM CDT
I have been checking Gabrielle's website daily for quite a while now. On this day, I feel led to sign in and let you know that I have said a special prayer for your family on this second anniversary of Gabbie's death. I can't even begin to imagine the grief of losing a child, but I know that God fully understands. I pray that God, through his infinite wisdom and mercy, grants you a sense of comfort and peace that can only come from HIM. Monica, thank you so much for candidly sharing your heart and beliefs with us. Many days, your words have truly been an inspiration to me.
Susan Vicari <svicari@centurysb.com>
Pittsgrove, NJ - Monday, May 17, 2004 2:18 PM CDT
Our prayers and thoughts are with you and your family always, especially on this day.
With Love,
The Hujanen Family
Shannon Hujanen <hujanenfamily@mcleodusa.net>
Blaine, MN Anoka - Monday, May 17, 2004 1:11 PM CDT
Monica and John: We want you to know that our hearts and prayers go out to you. We also know that Gabbie has received her reward in heaven and that some day we will be with her again.
Love, Mom and Dad
Jerry and Jeanine Totall <grtotall@aol.com>
Bloomington, MN - Monday, May 17, 2004 12:51 AM CDT
Monica and John: We want you to know that our hearts and prayers go out to you. We also know that Gabbie has received her reward in heaven and that some day we will be with her again.
Love, Mom and Dad
Jerry and Jeanine Totall <grtotall@aol.com>
Bloomington, MN - Monday, May 17, 2004 12:51 AM CDT
Monica and John: We want you to know that our hearts and prayers go out to you. We also know that Gabbie has received her reward in heaven and that some day we will be with her again.
Love, Mom and Dad
Jerry and Jeanine Totall <grtotall@aol.com>
Bloomington, MN - Monday, May 17, 2004 12:51 AM CDT
Monica and John,
I wish I was there to give you a hug and to let you know
how much I care and how heavy my heart is for you--every day that you spend without Gabbie.
My love and prayers are with you always..
Love,
Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Monday, May 17, 2004 12:24 AM CDT
My prayers are still with you and your family.
Jennifer Miles www.caringbridge.org/mn/deemartinson <jennifer.miles@thomson.com>
Minneapolis, MN USA - Monday, May 17, 2004 11:38 AM CDT
Dear Paquette family,
I just want to let you know that my thoughts and prayers are with you on this day.
Bernadette Cassidy <Bernadette.Cassidy@us.ing.com>
Minneapolis, Mn USA - Monday, May 17, 2004 11:17 AM CDT
Monica and Family - the words are hard to come by today. So sorry your sweet little girl left this world too soon but so happy for her that she suffers no more. So, so very sorry that she had to suffer at all. She did not have or want for earthly riches but her jewels in Heaven are shining ever so brightly. I'm sure God is happy at the mountain of work she accomplished in her very short life. Look at the lives all of you have touched. Two years later there are many, many of us still following your journey of faith and your promise to your daughter. May God be with you today and everyday.
Rhonda Meyer <rschultz@scl.doc.state.mn.us>
- Monday, May 17, 2004 11:10 AM CDT
Monica thinking of you guys today and of sweet Gabrielle on her two year anniversary. I will pray for a peaceful day filled only with sweet memories of her.
God bless you
Sally Torres <sally_torres@lusknet.com>
Anaheim, - Monday, May 17, 2004 11:08 AM CDT
THINKING OF YOU TODAY & SAYING A LITTLE PRAYER FOR YOU!
Always remembering your PRECIOUS Gabbie!!
Lots of Love & hugs to you all!!
Love
Angel Sheryl
Sheryl Gunzenhauser <mik181@mchsi.com>
Winnebago, MN - Monday, May 17, 2004 11:03 AM CDT
Dear Monica and Family,
My thoughts and prayers are with you today on Gabbie's two year anniversary into heaven. You have been on my mind so much lately. Once again, please know how much you and Gabbie have impacted my life in such a positive way.
Thank you for sharing your beautiful daughter with us.
Andrea
- Monday, May 17, 2004 10:54 AM CDT
Monica- Thinking of you and your family today. Your beautiful Gabbie will always be remembered and loved for eternity!!! Gabbie- Will You continue to keep watching over all of us? You have really helped me make positive changes in my life...THANK YOU!!!
Love Always
KIM
Kimberly Heaton <kimberlyheaton@yahoo.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Monday, May 17, 2004 9:32 AM CDT
Thinking of your family today and praying for peace to fill your hearts, as you remember and miss your sweet little Gabbie.
The family of Jackson Espeseth <eaglet@cltcomm.net>
Clear Lake, WI - Monday, May 17, 2004 9:17 AM CDT
Thinking of you today ... as we do everyday but more on this solemn day ... loving all of you ...
Rebekah Clark <rclark@jrhinc.com>
Prior Lake, MN USA - Monday, May 17, 2004 9:01 AM CDT
Monica,
Looking at the precious picture of Gabbie's rare smile and praying that her parents can smile today with sweet memories of their little saint. Knowing that there will also be tears......... Love, Kathy
Kathy Welch <abbysmamaa@yahoo.com>
Lexington, Ohio - Monday, May 17, 2004 8:52 AM CDT
Monica,
Our earthly loss is heaven's gain, but how it hurts. God bless you on this day...a sad day indeed, but I know that every day without precious Gabbie is sad. Your faithfulness to God's plan is inspiring and Gabbie herself continues to bring more people to Christ through you.
Missing sweet Gabrielle, but knowing the Lord has her close in his arms. Blessings to you and your whole family today...
Love,
Cathy & st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn usa - Monday, May 17, 2004 8:39 AM CDT
Dear Monica and Family- Thinking of you today and always.
Cathy Rossini <trossini@comcast.net>
IGH, MN - Monday, May 17, 2004 8:35 AM CDT
Monica and family
I haven't signed the guestbook in a long time but I continue to follow your journey. I just wanted you to know I am thinking of you and your family today.
Shelly
- Monday, May 17, 2004 8:12 AM CDT
Dear Monica, John, Aubrey and Noah,
Thinking of you on this especially difficult anniversary date.
Hugs,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Monday, May 17, 2004 8:05 AM CDT
Monica, thinking of and praying for you all on precious Gabrielle's two year anniversary in heaven. May the Lord bless you and keep you and bring you peace on this difficult day. God bless.
Robin Boger <Robin.Boger@rbc.com>
Lewisville, NC - Monday, May 17, 2004 7:38 AM CDT
Dear Monica and family, I am thinking of you today on the 2-year anniversary of Gabbie's departure to Heaven. Although I haven't written for a very long time, I think of Gabbie and all of you often- she was so sweet and beautiful. Thank you, Monica, for sharing your faith with all of us - you really have impacted my life.
Patti Kamrath <itsjustpat02@yahoo.com>
Dayton, MN USA - Monday, May 17, 2004 7:32 AM CDT
St. Gabbie,
Such a sweet curly-headed soul gone too young...your pain is no more but your legacy has touched so many. I wish you and your family a peaceful day and fond memories as they continue this arduous journey to you.
Jenn Hartley <ronjenn696@prodigy.net>
Bensalem, PA USA - Monday, May 17, 2004 7:16 AM CDT
Dearesst Monica,
Thinking of you and praying for you and John on this most difficult day. Missing, Loving and Remembering Gabbie.
Love you Gabbie- can't wait to hug you in Heaven.
I love you,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Monday, May 17, 2004 7:05 AM CDT
Monica & John,
My thoughts and prayers will be with you tomorrow. Please Lord, help them through this painful day..........
Love in Christ
Christy <calee59@wi.rr.com>
S. Milwaukee, WI - Sunday, May 16, 2004 10:51 PM CDT
Dearest Monica--
I read these verses today and thought of you:
"Remember your word to your servant,
for you have given me hope.
My comfort in my suffering is this:
Your promise renews my life." Ps 119:49,50
I know that you cling to God's promises of redemption and resurrection! Through the pain of the day, you can look to the future knowing that you WILL see precious Gabbie again! And she is now in His presence, already with Him basking in all His glory.
"Therefore the redeemed of the Lord shall return,
and come with singing unto Zion;
and everlasting joy shall be upon their head;
they shall obtain gladness and joy;
and sorrow and mourning shall flee away." Isaiah 51:11
How we look for that day!
"So do not fear, for I am with you;
do not be dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you;
I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." Isaiah 41:10
We know that He cradles us in His hand until He calls us home to Himself. It is the only thing that makes the waiting bearable.
Praying that you feel His gentle hand today...Melody
Melody Bell <mabellteach@aol.com>
Baltimore, MD - Sunday, May 16, 2004 8:13 PM CDT
Praise the Lord for the blessing of prayer! You are in my heart and thoughts and I lift your names before His throne where we know we will receive His grace and mercy in our hour of need. I am so grateful He has caused our lives to touch, our paths to meet. I join you and your family in prayer, beloved sister, thanking our compassionate Lord for His unmeasureable benefits, His joy unspeakable, His blessed hope and undescribeable peace and asking Him to comfort, enlighten and draw to Himself all the hurting, afflicted souls that cry out in despair this day.
Yolanda Rogers <galatians5@truevine.net>
Altamonte Springs, FL USA - Sunday, May 16, 2004 3:04 PM CDT
Always praying for the familes that have lost their children to this awful disease.
Anita mother of Holly <armoore@charter.net>
Sikeston, MO - Saturday, May 15, 2004 5:21 PM CDT
Monica, dont know what to day as tomorrow approaches but I wish you strength and love and a smile here and there....
Chris ~ Gooch's Site ~
- Saturday, May 15, 2004 3:04 PM CDT
Precious picture of precious Gabbie...just precious.
Debbie Nagy
- Saturday, May 15, 2004 2:27 PM CDT
My Dear Friend Monica,
Just thinking of you today,praying for you and remebering Gabbie. Thank you so much for sharing openly and honestly about your struggles- you are amazing!!
I love You Monica and I love Gabbie- my heart breaks with yours over the fact that she is not here on earth with you. Waiting to see her in Heaven!
With All my Love and Prayers,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Friday, May 14, 2004 1:10 PM CDT
Hi Monica,
I still check your site daily but with two little ones, rarely have time to post. I think of you often though.
Last night I was watching Larry King Live and Dr. Phil was on. A woman who had lost a child called in and asked how to deal with it. He responded that he would never say that he understood her grief and that her grief never goes away. He also told her not to feel guilty for happy moments in life. He said it's not something you can ever get over, it's just something you have to learn to live with.
The pain you must be feeling as this anniversary approaches must be immense. I wish I could lessen it but I know I cannot.
You are in my prayers.
Hugs,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Friday, May 14, 2004 9:29 AM CDT
You always leave me speechless -- which is hard to do! I continue to check in on you and am always inspired by your faith.
Tammy Holston <tsholston@bellsouth.net>
Roswell, GA - Friday, May 14, 2004 6:52 AM CDT
Monica,
Thinking of you over the next few days, may you feel peace and rest in God's loving arms. I like what you shared today about getting angry at God, because I have done it myself a few times.... sure we could all 'fess up to it a time or two. What a blessing that you were able to hear that segment on Chuck Swindoll....not an accident I'm sure. I'm glad that part of your burden was lifted, but I know you will always carry most of it till you are reunited with Gabbie. I know some of us wish there was more we could do to help you other than pray or encourage you, it really is a helpless feeling sometimes! Please don't delete ANYTHING from Gabbie's history! My computer is sometimes slow when I get to the guestbook page, but it is well worth the wait! Have a blessed and restful weekend, we'll be praying for you.
Christy <calee59@wi.rr.com>
So. Mil, WI - Thursday, May 13, 2004 10:57 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
I have absolutely NO problem getting your journal history. Do NOT delete any of Gabbie's site. It comes up within 2-3 seconds on my computer. The person that complained below, obviously has an inadequate computer.
As far as yelling and screaming at God. Many of us have done it. I remember when I was still childless and had lost my second child to miscarriage. I felt a terrible rage and anger toward God. I said terrible things to Him. I am so thankful that He can love us even though we at times are so unlovable. I know that He forgave me in my anguish and brought me back to the place that I needed to be. I have no doubt, that even though I am a sinner, I will be 'dere!!
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Thursday, May 13, 2004 9:08 PM CDT
Thinking of you and your family and praying for you with my heart full of love and respect..
God Bless You.
Love and support always,
Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Thursday, May 13, 2004 9:05 PM CDT
Dear Monica:
I too want to walk alongside you and carry a splinter of the cross you bear - I just love Cathy...and she has such eloquence with her writing doesn't she? Never met her in person (yet) but know she's become such a dear friend to you. Anyway, I'm so sorry I haven't been in touch - I still check your site several times a week and learn from you and always pray for you. Life has been just so busy - I wonder when it will slow down - I need it to so that I can have time to read my Bible and do devotions, pray more, etc, etc. I know you don't like anniversaries - or doing anything 'special' but I did just want to acknowledge that I will be thinking of you in the coming days. Love,
Mari Beth Ross <jerryandmaribethross@comcast.net>
Hugo, MN - Thursday, May 13, 2004 8:53 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
Thanks for writing about the "time limit" one is expected to have when grieving. I agree with you that the raw pain experienced when you first lose your child does fade, but just like you, I will forever be where I am at right now.
Thinking about you every day, especially at this time of year.
Love, Janine
Janine Nielsen <ekimnielsen@msn.com>
Minneapolis, MN - Thursday, May 13, 2004 12:25 AM CDT
Monica,
Just as the "sword of sorrow that would pierce her heart" (Luke 2:33) was prophesied by Simeon about Mary, so too has this same sword pierced your heart. I agree, you will NEVER EVER finish grieving your beloved Gabbie. None of us will ever finish grieving her loss, the world is a grayer place w/o her beautiful presence. I hope only to walk with you and help you carry a splinter of this cross that was given to you. May all of our prayers help ease the hole in your heart that this sword of sorrow has caused.
Thank you for mentioning me on your site! All glory to Jesus because it is in him that we are anything at all :). I am so thankful for your friendship and love...know of my fervent prayers for you.
It is on rainy days like today that I feel like God is crying with us too...
Cathy & st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Thursday, May 13, 2004 9:31 AM CDT
I guess I have a really hard time understanding how some people can place a time limit on grief. You love her and miss her as much today as the day she died. To get over your grief would be to get over the loss of your child. I agree with you, sad as it is, that is NEVER going to happen. I guess I really, really struggle to understand how a thousand years could lessen grief. The loss is there, it is real and felt every day just like your love for your child is felt every day. As for deleting some stuff, PLEASE PLEASE don't. To delete "some stuff" would be to delete Gabbies struggle and your family's struggle. It would be deleting your message of faith and her question to you that still haunts me every day..."Will you be dere?" As always, you are in my thoughts and prayers. Especially with the anniversary of her death fast approaching. I'm sure the anniversary date although brings back some very painful memories. One thing that stays very vivid in my mind is the day Gabbie came home from the hospital. I can picture you waiting on the steps. It breaks my heart.
Rhonda Meyer <rschultz@scl.doc.state.mn.us>
- Thursday, May 13, 2004 8:54 AM CDT
Monica,
Extra prayers for you this week. It still hurts to think of Gabbie. She was so special.
Love, Sarah
Sarah <sarahtotall@hotmail.com>
Mpls, MN - Thursday, May 13, 2004 8:43 AM CDT
Jeez what do you all have on that Journal History?? My computer had a major meltdown trying to load it all, and whatever's on there also tried to give my computer a virus. I was just looking to find the beginning of your daughter's struggle on there. :( maybe you should try deleting something!
Rinoa <absol1836@aol.com>
- Thursday, May 13, 2004 0:48 AM CDT
My Dearest Monica,
How my heart hurts with yours that you do not have your Precious, Sweet Gabbie with you here on earth. You will always miss her until you see her again in Heaven. You grieve with Hope, but you grieve all the same. I love you Monica and I love Gabbie. Praying for you all the time-thank you for sharing so openly and honestly, I know you're helping so many people who are on this grief journey- one no one would ever choose.
Missing and Loving Gabbie with you today and always!
With Love because of Jesus,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@Insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Wednesday, May 12, 2004 7:41 PM CDT
Your entry for Tuesday brought a big smile to my face!! Let's just say that if you and I and my daughter Holly were all together in a car we would be a sight to behold! I told Holly after we got home from South Carolina that I did not want to see a map again for a year! We learned our lesson though - the trip home was completely on Interstate highways! With love from your also directionally challenged friend, Kathy
Kathy Welch <abbysmamaa@yahoo.com>
Lexington, Ohio - Wednesday, May 12, 2004 8:08 AM CDT
You and the many other mothers who have lost their children for one reason or another were especially in my thoughts this Mother's Day. I have no doubt Gabbie was close in your heart and constantly in your thoughts on Mother's Day and always.
Rhonda Meyer <rschultz@scl.doc.state.mn.us>
- Monday, May 10, 2004 3:53 PM CDT
Happy Mother's Day Monica
Love,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt
Zimmerman, MN - Monday, May 10, 2004 6:13 AM CDT
Happy Mother's Day Monica!
Laura, Ken, Nathan & ^^Angel Jillian^^ http://caringbridge.org/fl/jillian/
Naples, FL - Sunday, May 9, 2004 9:55 PM CDT
Thinking of a special Mama & a special friend on Mother's Day. God bless.
Robin Boger <Robin.Boger@rbc.com>
Lewisville, NC - Sunday, May 9, 2004 3:34 PM CDT
Thinking of you on this Mother's Day, Monica.
Love,
Natalie Martin-Rak (www.caringbridge.com/fl/lina) <vladanat@comcast.net>
jacksonville, FL - Sunday, May 9, 2004 12:24 AM CDT
Thinking of you a lot today, dear Monica..
You are a wonderful Momma to all of your children.
God Bless
With Love,
Sara Hammer <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Sunday, May 9, 2004 12:19 AM CDT
Thinking of you lots, love from Poppy and everybody at postpals. xxxxxx Poppy <info@postpals.co.uk>
milton Keynes, England - Sunday, May 9, 2004 5:38 AM CDT
Thinking of You on Mother's Day.
God bless,
Eileen
www.caringbridge.org/il/ej
EJ's Caring Place
- Sunday, May 9, 2004 4:15 AM CDT
Monica,
Just stopping by to wish you a wonderful Mother's Day to one of the world's best moms. God bless you.
Love, Jen Buckentine
Zachary's Site <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Saturday, May 8, 2004 8:11 PM CDT
Monica,
You are such a loving momma, loving Gabbie (and Aubrey and Noah!) in so many ways. God bless you this mother's day and 5/17. Know you are always in our prayers and in my thoughts so often. It was good to see you this a.m., we'll have to get together sometime again to chat and visit at length :).
Love to you sister in Christ,
Cathy & st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@earthlink.net>
st. paul, mn - Saturday, May 8, 2004 5:27 PM CDT
Monica,
Thinking of you, my friend. You are always in my heart and in my prayers. This month sure does bring a lot of emotions. I know it all to well, and as the rest of the world seems to go on, always know that I will never forget...as many other's here that love you and care for you. God bless you.
Michelle <eaglet@cltcomm.net>
Clear Lake, WI - Saturday, May 8, 2004 2:21 PM CDT
Monica,
Prayers for all of the Moms attending your group this weekend and for the ones who can't be there. Just another bittersweet reminder this weekend of the cross you all carry, I pray that the Lord will bless each of you in a special way and let you know how deeply you are all loved. Peace be with you my friend!
Christy <calee59@wi.rr.com>
S. Milwaukee, WI - Friday, May 7, 2004 5:34 PM CDT
Dearest Monica,
Just thinking of you and praying for you. Thank you for sharing your heart. I'll be praying for your group tomorrow, my heart aches for all the Mommies who will deal with Mother's Day without one or any of their precious chidlren. My heart aches with and for you my dear friend.
I love you!! Loving and Missing Gabbie with you.
Love and Prayers,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@Insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Friday, May 7, 2004 11:17 AM CDT
Dear Monica,
I have checked daily, but not signed in for quite awhile. You and your family are always in my prayers. May you have a blessed Mother's Day. Thank you for providing such an inspirational journal to help all mothers become closer to God and appreciate each and everyday they spend with their children.
In Christian friendship and love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Thursday, May 6, 2004 11:39 PM CDT
Mothers Day Prayer
I Pray for you that on this special Mothers day,
God fills your heart in a truley beautiful way.
And may, He in His reach from heaven above,
Flow the wonderful family spirit, of His love.
I pray He grant, truley sweet and Angelic care,
That you may know, He is, always there.
I pray within God's great vast Love for you
In life, daily onward, In all that you may do,
You feel His love, His strength, His peace,
This Mothers Day blesses a spiritual release.
Have a Blessed Mothers Day
Chris Ullrich - Bella's Grammy <c_ullrich@msn.com, www.caringbridge.com/page/isabellaledesma>
- Thursday, May 6, 2004 3:29 PM CDT
Monica- I still check on you daily but It's been some time since I left you a message. With Mother's Day coming up I had to let you know that you are such a wonderful mother to all three of your children. They are all so blessed to have a mother like you. I belive that is why God chose you to be especialy the mother to Gabbie. You are so special and unique, definately one of a kind. It wouldn't be me if I didn't leave a poem for you. I hope you enjoy this one, I think it really speaks the truth...
DEAR MOM~
Don’t be sad, Mom. Please don’t cry.
The Lord called so quickly and suddenly,
I just rose up to meet Him in the sky.
And, Mom, I never did fear to die.
For, I could see Jesus was right by my side.
I can see you shedding tears.
But now, I see beyond mortal years,
Beyond limitations of mortal eyes,
To God’s final purpose ~ to God’s paradise.
The reasons are clear, Mom, and I understand.
How I wish I could reach down and just take your hand,
And whisper the Great Love in which I abide.
But, I am here and you’re on the other side.
I’d like to just touch you, make you understand,
That I was just loaned, Mom, for awhile, in God’s plan.
Remember the good times. Forget all the bad.
Be thankful for all of the prayer times we had.
I can’t come back, Mom. But, I love you still.
So, I trust you’ll always seek God’s perfect will.
The blood of the Savior, the Pathway of Love,
Will lead you, quite safely, to Heaven above.
Sometimes, just be still, Mom, and listen to God.
And, He will show you the way you must trod.
On that great day of rapture, we’ll meet in the sky;
The circle unbroken through eons of time!
Joan Clifton Costner
Copyrighted.
P.s Gabbie- Still thinking of your beautiful face. You will be LOVED BY ALL FOR ETERNITY!!!! We'll be talking to you tonite, as always:)
Love
Kim & Ayanna
Kimberly Heaton <kimberlyheaton@yahoo.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Thursday, May 6, 2004 12:26 AM CDT
My Dearest Monica,
My heart breaks with and for you and for Precious Gabbie for all she had to endure in her life here on earth. I'm so sorry that your arms are forever empty without her, that there is a forever empty place in your heart and soul that will never be filled until Heaven. Thankful with you for the promise and assurance that Gabbie is Safe in the Arms of Jesus in enternal rest. You grieve with Hope, but grieve all the same.
I love you my dear friend. Missing and Loving Gabbie with you!
With All my Love and Prayers,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Wish it was closer, Ohio - Thursday, May 6, 2004 8:17 AM CDT
My Dearest Monica,
My heart breaks with and for you and for Precious Gabbie for all she had to endure in her life here on earth. I'm so sorry that your arms are forever empty without her, that there is a forever empty place in your heart and soul that will never be filled until Heaven. Thankful with you for the promise and assurance that Gabbie is Safe in the Arms of Jesus in enternal rest. You grieve with Hope, but grieve all the same.
I love you my dear friend. Missing and Loving Gabbie with you!
With All my Love and Prayers,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Wish it was closer, Ohio - Thursday, May 6, 2004 8:17 AM CDT
Dearest Monica,
Thinking of you and praying for you. I'm so sorry that you must live here on earth without your precious Gabbie. I've simply fallen in Love with you and in love with Gabbie. She is so very precious to me as are you. My prayers will continue as you approach the second anniversary of Gabbie's death.
All my Love and Many Prayers,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Too Far Away !, Ohio - Wednesday, May 5, 2004 6:51 AM CDT
Monica,
Thank you for always always ALWAYS speaking the Lord's Truth clearly!!! It is true, it is NOT ourselves who are doing the saving, but our precious Lord Jesus Christ. And thank God for that!!! I am far too weak to go another day without the hope and complete knowledge that it is God in control. The grief of missing Luke and fighting to go on each day with enthusiasm is truly wearing me down. thank you for always providing a shoulder to cry with. Love you
Ivy Ervin Forever Missing Luke <ivymeadows@earthlink.net http://caringbridge.org/oh/lukeervin>
- Monday, May 3, 2004 7:14 PM CDT
Monica, I love the new picture...a Momma with her two precious girls. I was out of town last week & didn't sign in but I loved the picture of Gabbie in the paints, though, my first thought was that it was peanut butter & jelly! Your journal entries continue to be so moving...and yes, Jesus is the only way to salvation...no matter what your denomination. Lots of love from your former Baptist now Moravian friend!
Robin Boger <Robin.Boger@rbc.com>
Lewisville, NC - Monday, May 3, 2004 8:14 AM CDT
Dearest Monica,
The picture of you with your girls is beautiful, precious Gabbie, Precious Aubrey enjoying time with their Momma. Thinking of you often, praying for you! Missing and Loving Gabbie with you.
All my Love,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Monday, May 3, 2004 7:35 AM CDT
I love that photo of you and the girls.
Precious moments together.
Thinking of you daily, with love.
Michelle E.
Clear Lake, WI - Friday, April 30, 2004 10:28 PM CDT
Dearest Monica,
The new you posted picture is wonderful.
Beautiful Aubrey, beautiful Momma, and beautiful precious
Gabbie.
As always, my heart is so heavy for Gabbie's physical absence from your lives--more than I can ever express.
I grieve with you, Monica, for Gabbie's absense..
Love Always,
Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Friday, April 30, 2004 5:00 PM CDT
Dearest Monica,
I thank you as always for sharing all that you do on Gabbie's site- the truth of Jesus Christ. Thank you for sharing the truth about the abortion issue. You are an amazing woman, an amazing Mommy and most of all an amazing Daughter of the King!! I'm so honored to know you!
I love you! Loving and Missing Gabbie with you today and everyday until Heaven!!
With All My Love,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Thursday, April 29, 2004 7:31 AM CDT
Monica,
So glad we can all agree on the fact there is no one sure-fire religion. I'll be the first to admit, I still carry some bias against some particular denominations, but I have to remind myself that religion is something we came up with, so there has to be room for error and forgiveness. The bottom line: one way to Jesus and EVERYTHING needs to point to Him! Thanks to all of you out there that make it crystal clear that believers come from all walks of life and different denominations. When people look at us, do they see a Christian or a (fill in the church of your choice!)? Just think, one day it won't matter, we will be too busy praising Him to worry about such things! Thanks once again for taking a topic some of us get sooo touchy about and speaking of it in a loving, non-threatening manner. From a former Baptist turned Methodist, now non-denominational follower of Jesus!
Christy <calee59@wi.rr.com>
So. Mil, WI - Wednesday, April 28, 2004 10:24 PM CDT
Monica,
Jesus is the reason for our salvation! I'm SO glad that you're learning more about the Catholic faith...learning about Jesus in any avenue is always great :). May the Holy Spirit guide us all on right pathways to heaven!
Love your devoted CATHOLIC friend :),
Cathy & st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@earthlink.com>
st. paul, mn - Wednesday, April 28, 2004 10:32 AM CDT
Dearest Monica,
I agree wholeheartly with your journal entry about demoniation not mattering- it doesn't! The only thing that matters is a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. Thank you for sharing that truth. You my dear friend are an amazing missionary!
Loving and Missing Gabbie with you!
With all my Love in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Wednesday, April 28, 2004 7:35 AM CDT
I love it when I hear other Christians say that it is NOT the denomination that matters, rather THE WAY, THE TRUTH, AND THE LIFE--JESUS CHRIST. He is the unifier that binds His church together. It truly will be fantastic to see how all our denominational differences will fade and melt away as we are united in heaven as His Bride to behold His glory! And there are already those basking in His presence and discerning the truth in ways we cannot (St. Gabbie being one of those, of course!).
Please add Presbyterians to your list of churches that are filled with people who are saved and people who are not. Godly ministers bring the gospel message to their churches for that very reason (and to remind the believers of their place in His grace), praying that hearts will change as the Holy Spirit does His work. It is so important to keep our eyes focused on Jesus and to immerse ourselves in His Word. Thanks for reminding us, your readers!
From a used to Baptist, now Reformed Presbyterian (PCA), but definitely Daughter of Zion :-D--Melody
Melody Bell
Baltimore, MD - Wednesday, April 28, 2004 5:00 AM CDT
Hi Monica, Thank you so much for thinking of Steve and the rest of us today. It is actually harder for us the second year. I think the fanality has set in. We will be thinking and praying for all of you knowing in a few weeks you too will go through this.
We just miss them so much.
Love and prayers, Mike, Janine, Laura and of course Steve Nielsen
Mike Nielsen <ekimnielsen@msn.com>
Coon Rapids, MN USA - Tuesday, April 27, 2004 7:37 PM CDT
Monica,
Another beautifully eloquent and profound journal entry today; How very true that one only needs Jesus, not a particular denomination to gain eternal life. His name is the only one that all will be required to know to reside with Gabbie and all of the saints in heaven. We may vary in doctrine or dogma, but that will all pass away when we join in corporate worship before the throne. With love from your Lutheran-turned-Baptist-but above-all-Christian friend, Kathy
Kathy Welch <abbysmamaa@yahoo.com>
Lexington, Ohio - Tuesday, April 27, 2004 7:05 PM CDT
Monica,
Gabbie's light is burning so brightly! There's no hiding it beneath any bushel basket or earthly grave...God continues to use her to bring more people to Christ. What an amazing little girl!!!!!
Aubrey is such a holy little punkin too, God bless her for asking the question about Jesus in the people's hearts. You are forming her young mind in a Godly way and the holy spirit is already at work in her. She too will bring many to Christ :).
I'm missing our girls so much and hope that they can send us heavenly kisses...
Love and God bless you,
Cathy & st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@earthlink.com>
st. paul, mn - Tuesday, April 27, 2004 5:44 PM CDT
Dearest Monica,
Just wanted you to know I stopped by to read and pray for you. Thank you for your thoughtful journal entries. I love you Monica and I love your sweet Gabbie so very much!
Loving Gabbie and Missing her with you!
All My Love,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Monday, April 26, 2004 10:47 AM CDT
This is Grandma Gail to Sweet Angel Luke. Thank you for posting Luke in Gabbies journal, it means a lot. Gabbie is a beautiful little girl. Your Angel has a lot of other Angels to play with now,as our great granddaughter Jordan says Gabbie is perfect now , when you go to heaven you are perfect and not sick anymore. Also she said Luke has his hair back. So Angel Gabbie does too. We miss Luke so very much, our lives had become revoling him for the most of 3yrs. He had done his work here on earth, he touched so many lives, as i'm sure Gabbie had done, and he called him home. Neuroblastma is a horrible disease the children suffer so much. Our prayers are with you and thank you for your concern. Sweet Hugs from the Sweets
htt://www.caringbridge.org/oh/lukesweet
Grandpa Gene and Grandma Gail Sweet and family <gailsweet@zoominternet.net>
Ashland, Oh U.S.A. - Sunday, April 25, 2004 12:21 AM CDT
This is Grandma Gail to Sweet Angel Luke. Thank you for posting Luke in Gabbies journal, it means a lot. Gabbie is a beautiful little girl. Your Angel has a lot of other Angels to play with now,as our great granddaughter Jordan says Gabbie is perfect now , when you go to heaven you are perfect and not sick anymore. Also she said Luke has his hair back. So Angel Gabbie does too. We miss Luke so very much, our lives had become revoling him for the most of 3yrs. He had done his work here on earth, he touched so many lives, as i'm sure Gabbie had done, and he called him home. Neuroblastma is a horrible disease the children suffer so much. Our prayers are with you and thank you for your concern. Sweet Hugs from the Sweets
htt://www.caringbridge.org/oh/lukesweet
Grandpa Gene and Grandma Gail Sweet and family <gailsweet@zoominternet.net>
Ashland, Oh U.S.A. - Sunday, April 25, 2004 12:19 AM CDT
Dear Monica,
As always, your words- and the beautiful pictures of precious sweet Gabbie- reach out and touch the depths of my heart.
God Bless You.
Love Always,
Sara
www.caringbridge.com/mn/danielhammer <hammertime311@comcast.net >
Lakeland, MN USA - Friday, April 23, 2004 7:18 PM CDT
Dearest Monica,
What a heartbreakingly beautiful picture of your precious Gabbie. She is so precious. I know you miss her with ever single part of your being and nothing can ever take that away here on earth. I'm so sorry that you can't have your baby in your arms and my heart aches with and for you my dear friend.
Thankful with your for the promise and assurance of a Heavenly reunion for you with Gabbie, and I'll get to meet her for the very first time, a little girl I never knew but who I love so very much. Dear Precious, Beautiful Saint Gabbie!!
Loving Gabbie with you!
All of my Love,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@Insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Friday, April 23, 2004 6:04 PM CDT
Keep writing. We appreciate you.
Dianne <dianneg@integraonline.com>
Prior Lake, MN - Friday, April 23, 2004 8:55 AM CDT
Dearest Monica,
Just wanted you to know I stopped by to look at Gabbie's beautiful face and to remember a little girl I never knew, but who I love so very much! So sorry for the pain you feel on this earth without your precious Gabbie.
On another note- A very Happy Birthday to Gabbie's Auntie Sarah! Hope her day is just as special as she is!
My Love in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Much to far away, Ohio - Thursday, April 22, 2004 6:49 AM CDT
hi monica
well you put me in the right step,the next step. tonight i will be going to my first grief meeting. at first i thought im ok i dont need it, but then i noticed i everytime i came in to gabbies site it was a sense that i did need it more than ever. thank you for opening my eyes and heart. your site is so helpful to me in more ways than you know. that and i cant get enough of gabbies eyes they melt me.
love abbie
«♥ Mitchell♥» <afraser1@tru.eastlink.ca>
- Wednesday, April 21, 2004 9:29 AM CDT
Monica,
I heard a great quote..."faith doesn't make it any less painful, but it makes it possible to go on living". We go on carrying our cross and trusting that Jesus has a plan bigger than our own.
I sat down and read through 1/2 the Touchstone...I love it! Thanks again!
Love and God bless you,
Cathy & st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@earthlink.com>
st. paul, mn - Wednesday, April 21, 2004 8:27 AM CDT
Dearest Monica,
Thank you for sharing your feelings so openly and honestly. I'm so sorry that you my dear friend have had to feel this pain, that will not heal here on earth. I'm thankful with you and for you that our precious Jesus has promised that He will wipe all the tears away in Heaven. That promise real and true doesn't diminish in any way the very real pain you feel each and every day, you grieve with hope, but grieve all the same.
I love you Monica and I love Gabbie and can't wait to meet her in Heaven!
With All my Love,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Wednesday, April 21, 2004 7:11 AM CDT
Monica,
Thank you for being so honest on Gabbie's website. I really admire that. Your words on healing from the death of a child are so very true. We will not be healed in this life in the sense that so many people want us to be. But because of God's love and grace we do manage to go on with the incredible hope that He gives us for our eternal future. Also, the visual of picturing our children with wings is quite disturbing. As hard as it is to bring up in this "angel-mania" world we live in, I am so glad that you did. Thinking of you and John as always...
Love, Jen, Bill, Brady and Saint Zachary
Zachary's Site <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Tuesday, April 20, 2004 9:37 PM CDT
Monica--I haven't signed in ages but come to read your comments amd perceptions daily as I lift you in prayer. I was moved in my busyness today to write to say thank you for such a blessed way to explain healing...a different type of healing. Man's ways are not God's ways, and you so eloquently show that here--that healing comes from grabbing hold of the hurt and pain, not sugar coating, knowing that He is somewhere in its midst giving the power to go on, knowing that He will erase all of it in eternity! To reiterate the message you always bring to your readers: He didn't spare His own Son...Jesus went willingly...His PASSION...He hurt Himself in ways we will never imagine...He grabbed hold of that hurt and pain, grabbed hold of all our hurt and pain, and covered it with His own blood, with His selfless and pure love. His healing is indeed miraculous--a healing redemption! And yet, my heart still aches for you in this uncommon joy. I am glad that you are healed despite your pain...I am glad that you can see through the veil of your pain, knowing that it was physically torn assunder the day He died. On one hand I am so sorry for the circumstances, for the pain Gabbie's death has brought you (and also for Gabbie's pain), but on the other hand, joyous at how this same pain has brought you along in your faith journey and in your reliance on Him. My arms reach out in love and compassion to you, yet it is all eclipsed by Jesus Himself, the ultimate everlasting arms that reached in love for His Passion to you. You are His beloved...Gabbie is His beloved. Bless you, sister in Christ!
Before signing off, I want you to read excerpts from a sermon given by John Chrysostom in the 4th century--powerful words, obviously Spirit given (just like the words you write in your journal)--it is still Eastertide and so appropriate:
"Let no one fear death,
for the death of our Saviour has set us free.
The Lord has destroyed death by enduring it.
The Lord vanquished hell when he descended into it.
The Lord put hell in turmoil even as it tasted of his flesh."
"Hell grasped a corpse, and met God.
Hell seized earth, and encountered heaven.
Hell took what it saw, and was overcome by what it could not see.
O death, where is your sting?
O hell, where is your victory?
Christ is risen, and you are cast down!
Christ is risen, and the demons are fallen!
Christ is risen, and the angels rejoice!
Christ is risen, and life is set free!
Christ is risen, and the tomb is emptied of its dead."
I read through it again, substituting the words "pain and hurt" wherever it said "death" or "hell." Then...
Christ is risen, and pain and hurt are cast down!
Christ is risen, and we are healed!
May you continue to encounter the RISEN Savior!
With love--Melody
Melody Bell
Baltimore, MD - Tuesday, April 20, 2004 8:53 PM CDT
Monica,
Your journal entry note on grief was beautifully written, touching and insightful.
Your love and beautiful faith in Jesus shines in every word your write..it really does.
God Bless You.
Love,
Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Tuesday, April 20, 2004 8:18 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
Just wanted you to know that I have been thinking about you today. Thank you for the picture of Gabbie with the flowers. I have it in a special place--on the piano next to Steve's picture. Somehow it just seems to belong there . . .
Love, Janine
J. Nielsen <ekimnielsen@msn.com>
Minneapolis, MN - Tuesday, April 20, 2004 6:03 PM CDT
I was just checking on a few people before my post-procedure nap and hadn't really planned on signing in, but you and I have discussed this issue and you know how I feel. Thanks for sharing it so clearly once again and bringing forth the truth of God's Word with such grace. Know that you're loved and cared for. Blessings.
Khalita My Caringbridge Site Duke Peds BMT Aplastic Anemia <khalita@hecaresonline.org>
Lexington, NC, - Tuesday, April 20, 2004 3:58 PM CDT
Dearest Monica,
Wanted you to know that I stopped by Gabbie's site to read and pray. Thank you for sharing the angel issue so clearly. You are amazing!
Loving Gabbie with you!
With My Love in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Tuesday, April 20, 2004 12:35 AM CDT
HI Monica;
Thank you for so clearly stating the truth and consequences of the 'angelmania' matter... It does "scare" you to think we turn into some other creature when we die, if that were true. Praise God, we do not!!!! Praying WITH you and FOR you in the loss of our babies... With love,
Ivy Ervin Forever Missing Luke <ivymeadows@earthlink.net http://caringbridge.org/oh/lukeervin>
Mansfield, Ohio - Monday, April 19, 2004 8:33 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
Thank you for what you said about Angels. I agree with you. And while I love and appreciate angels, I too am concerned about the "angel mania" in our society and the misinterpetrations. Thank you for stating it so well.
a reader <areader@aol.com>
- Monday, April 19, 2004 8:26 PM CDT
Just stopping by to say Hello--
As always, you have my love, prayers and support.
I know I've said this before, but you really do an extraordinary job with Gabbie's site. It is so beautiful.
God Bless!
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Monday, April 19, 2004 6:11 PM CDT
Just wanted you to know that even though I'm not so good at constantly signing in, you are continually in my thoughts and prayers. You don't know how much your generosity and friendship means to me. Blessings and love to you in Christ. I'll try to call you as soon as I can.
Khalita My Caringbridge Site Duke Peds BMT Aplastic Anemia <khalita@hecaresonline.org>
Lexington, NC, - Monday, April 19, 2004 4:00 PM CDT
Hi Monica,
That verse is one of my favorites! Thanks for sharing it with us...it is a blessedly sure hope that our children are with Jesus. I'm so glad you could be with another link from Gabbie's past, I too find it helpful to re-trace Theresa's steps. Bringing up beloved memories (& painful ones too) can be so healing...
Gabbie is so very beautiful, I love each picture you put on the page :).
Love and God bless,
Cathy & st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@earthlink.com>
st. paul, mn - Monday, April 19, 2004 10:43 AM CDT
Dearest Monica,
Thank you for always sharing Jesus and the truth of His resurcition as the sure foundation of our faith!! Hope you were able to enjoy the warm weather. On Vacation sites, I of course second Kathy's motion come to Ohio and visit. But if you're looking for a bit warmer place our family loves Hilton Head Island, SC- it's such a wonderful place, the beaches are clean and it's a ton of fun for kids.
Thinking of you and praying for you often. Loving Gabbie with you!
With Love,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Monday, April 19, 2004 7:20 AM CDT
Monica,
Just stopping by to say hi. I always look forward to reading your journal entries on Sunday nights. I was thinking, have you ever been to the Rockies? That would be a wonderful place for a family vacation. It is so beautiful there. I truly feel closer to God when I'm spending time in nature, in His beautiful, awesome creation. I've also heard the Grand Canyon or Yellowstone are good trips. Thank you for sharing Gabbie with us. I love all the new pictures you put up. I hope you have a good week. You and your family are in my prayers always.
Love, Jen Buckentine
Zachary's Site <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Sunday, April 18, 2004 9:59 PM CDT
Hey Monica,
We were very surprised with a boy, as we, too, have 2 girls. His name is Lincoln Jonathan. He is doing very well.
As I write in your guestbook and the Pohl guestbook, I always wonder what it is I could do for you, Pohl's and for some friends of ours who lost their only daughter a year ago in January in a car accident. She was in her junior year of high school. It has been a very rough year for them and my husband and I never knew what to say to them, but we were just always "there". My oldest, Sierra who is 5, always makes them pictures and we either mail them, bring them to church or "hand deliver" it. They have seemed to bond very well with Sierra. Sierra understands that Steph is gone and with Jesus. Well, today, we found something to help them. We all were in church (our first Sunday with the 3 kids. granted he was just born on the 6th, but it was a little scary at first, but he did fine.) and Benita and Kevin sat across the aisle from us and they were talking with Sierra. Kevin asked Sierra to come sit with them and she did. She went up for communion with them and they just looked so happy with her. She ended up staying with them after church to have cake and ice cream (we couldn't stay) so she went with them and then Sierra called and asked if she could stay for dinner with them, too. When Benita brought her back home, she seemed different and more "happy" if you could say that. She said they played Barbies and even Nathan, their son, got in on the action. She told me "thanks for sharing Sierra with us. We really enjoyed her and she can come back again." Sierra said the pictures she drew of Stephanie were hanging on the fridge, which made us feel happy because it's not as though they hung them up there quick before she was coming over. I guess I have learned that just "being there" maybe means more than trying to figure out the right thing to say or right thing to do for you guys. Like Kevin and Benita took the initiative to ask if they could spend time with Sierra.
I just want you to know that you guys truly are in my thoughts and prayers always, even if I don't write in here every day. I just think it's amazing how a family could impact my life so much and to think we haven't even met! Thank you, Monica, for sharing Gabbie with us and your other 2 awesome kids. I know I have said this before, but you are an extremely strong and courageous woman and the kids are lucky to have a mom like you and your husband is a lucky guy!
Always in my thoughts and prayers. . .
Becky <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
MN USA - Sunday, April 18, 2004 5:07 PM CDT
Hi! I found your website from Sydney's. Thank you for sharing your loss. I will keep you & your family in my prayers. I know that St.Gabby & Sydney are in Heaven playing. St.Gabby is showing Sydney how things work up there.
Regards, Leonya <crumbz33@aol.com>
Toledo, Oh - Saturday, April 17, 2004 4:26 PM CDT
Hey Ms. Monica :)
Thinking about you today. It is always uplifting to read your entries. Thank you for sharing from your heart and sharing in His Truth. Hope to see you again soon.
Jackson's mom, Michelle
Clear Lake, WI - Saturday, April 17, 2004 3:32 PM CDT
Hi Monica,
Stopping by to say hello.
Wish I had half of the faith you have.It would make all this a little bit easier believing that somebody was in charge!!
Best wishes to you and the family.
Sandra www.caringbridge.org/sd/gemma <luigitumminelli@virgilio.it>
Sicily, Italy - Friday, April 16, 2004 11:22 AM CDT
Hey Monica, I just looked at the other guest book entries. Looks like I started something about visiting the cities where cyber friends live. My family visits Major League Baseball stadiums. We have been to 16 as of this date. You could visit cyber friends, wouldn't that be something to visit 16 cyber friends, that had once been strangers. I'm sure all of the cyber friends that love you would also enjoy showing you the sites in their cities. Just a thought........
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Thursday, April 15, 2004 10:30 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
Looking forward to your journal next week, and so hoping you will share some of what Dr. Habermas teaches on Sunday evening. Have a safe and pleasant weekend.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Thursday, April 15, 2004 10:24 PM CDT
If you end up coming thru St. Louis, I would require just a few minutes of your time... to hug your necks and admire those beautiful babies! Yes, I live in Illinois, but am only 10 minutes from St. Louis. :) We're still praying for babies from Guatemala. There seems to be a light at the end of this very long tunnel, but nothing concrete to report at the moment. I think of you daily! your sister in Christ & grief
jan livingstone (Andy's Mom forever)
- Thursday, April 15, 2004 9:30 PM CDT
You could visit Milwaukee either on your way to Ohio and St Louis or on your way back!!! Just kidding, I don't think you would have enough vacation days to visit all of your friends who love you. Guess we will have to wait until heaven to do that, what a day that will be!
Christy <calee59@wi.rr.com>
South Milwaukee, WI - Thursday, April 15, 2004 8:13 PM CDT
Happy Easter!
I'm glad you're planning a little vacation, who knows how the Lord will use you away from home? You're the discipling family, out on an adventure to evangelize :). We enjoy going up North to Duluth/Grand Marais...nice and quiet, but yet there's plenty to do in the great outdoors.
Loving Gabbie today and always :)...she is so very beautiful.
Love,
Cathy & st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@earthlink.com>
st. paul, mn - Thursday, April 15, 2004 3:15 PM CDT
OHIO!! Of course! We have Columbus and Cleveland, both full of things to do. And then there's small towns like Lexington.
Love, Kathy
Kathy Welch <abbysmamaa@yahoo.com>
Lexington, Ohio - Thursday, April 15, 2004 9:48 AM CDT
Hi Monica,
There's lots to do in St. Louis and it is not that far away. Of course, Hawaii is good too!
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Wednesday, April 14, 2004 11:20 PM CDT
Dearest Monica,
Thank your for always sharing Jesus so openly on Gabbie's site. You are amazing! Thanks for sharing other children too so that we can pray for their families.
Thinking of you and praying for you all the time!
Loving Gabbie with you today and everyday!
Love in Chirst,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Wednesday, April 14, 2004 7:09 AM CDT
"It isn't that some do not know how or what to do. Simply, some are willing and some are not."
Beautifully stated, Monica. Very profound. And very correct.
I will pray for the ones who are not willing.
God Bless <afriend@aol.com>
- Tuesday, April 13, 2004 9:00 PM CDT
Monica,
I have to apologize again for not writing in here in awhile, but we had a baby boy last week and the months leading up to this were quite hectic.
I'm so glad to hear you had a pleasant Easter and Gabbie was remembered in many ways.
Just letting you know that you are always in my thoughts and prayers!!
Becky <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
- Tuesday, April 13, 2004 10:43 AM CDT
Monica,
Thankful that you had a nice Easter with the Paquette side of the family. Yes, I do see a lot of Gabbie's features in Noah. Hope you are having a good day.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Tuesday, April 13, 2004 8:27 AM CDT
Dearest Monica,
I'm so glad that Gabbie's name was metioned and that she was lovingly remembered. Thank you for sharing the truth of God's love so openly on Gabbie's site.
I love you Monica and I love Gabbie so much!!
With Love in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Tuesday, April 13, 2004 6:46 AM CDT
As usual Monica, another touching, heartfelty entry. I'm glad your holiday was better than expected
Chris ~ Gooch's Site ~
- Monday, April 12, 2004 7:53 PM CDT
Monica & John,
Happy Easter! What a joy our hope in the resurrection is! I wonder how amazing the heavens were for our babies these past few days?!
The picture of Gabbie is so very beautiful...so solemn, but such a little holy child of God. She had grace beyond her years. I'm so very sorry for your loss, may the risen Christ hold you close as you mourn.
Love,
Cathy & st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@earthlink.com>
st. paul, mn - Monday, April 12, 2004 1:38 PM CDT
Hi Monica;
Just a quick note - thank you for posting the newest picture of Gabbie - I continue to be amazed at those bright, wise eyes she had - even at such a tender age. Thank you for sharing her baby pictures. I so wish I'd have met her while she was here.
Mari Beth Ross <jerryandmaribethross@comcast.net>
Hugo, MN - Monday, April 12, 2004 10:44 AM CDT
Thinking of you today and wishing you all a Happy Easter!
Give Noah man and Miss Aubrey a huge hug from me!
Lots of Love
Angel Sheryl
Sheryl Gunzenhauser <mik181@mchsi.com>
Winnebago, Mn - Sunday, April 11, 2004 2:16 PM CDT
Dear Monica and family,
I am praying for you this Easter Sunday. I am so thankful that because you believe in our risen Lord and Savior, that there is no doubt, you will one day be reunited with your precious Gabbie. Praise God!!
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Sunday, April 11, 2004 12:04 AM CDT
Monica and John,
We are thinking of you and your family at this most holy time. We are continually giving praises to the King for the tremendous sacrifice that was made as Jesus took on our sins and died on the cross; and three days later He rose from the dead. Jesus is not dead, but alive. Gabrielle is not dead but very much alive and singing praises to the King. Until we meet her again someday in heaven, we will not ever forget her. Thank you for all you have done for me Monica. May God bless your Easter.
Love, Jen, Bill, Brady and Saint Zachary Buckentine
Zachary's Site <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Saturday, April 10, 2004 10:20 PM CDT
Came across your CaringBridge site and wanted to let you know I'm so sorry you lost your beautiful daughter. I lost my son to Neuroblastoma as well, last October. Big hugs to you and your family, and I wish you a peaceful Easter.
Much love,
Susan Armenio <barmenio@optonline.net>
New City, NY - Saturday, April 10, 2004 7:05 PM CDT
Thinking of you this Easter, Love everyone at Post Pals
viks <viks@postpals.co.uk>
- Saturday, April 10, 2004 5:36 PM CDT
Monica,
Just wanted to stop by and wish you and your family a blessed Easter. Thank you for the Christian example that you are. Gabbie is missed each day, even by those of us who never had the pleasure of meeting her here on earth, but some day.....
Love, hugs and prayers,
Rhonda Hunley, Connor's Mom
**Connor's page**
<rshunley@comcast.net>
Hendersonville, TN
Thank you for coming by to visit and signing my guestbook. I have been to your page often, but have not signed. May you have a joyus Easter knowing what awaits us in our Heavenly home. God bless, Eileen
www.caringbridge.org/il/ej
EJ's Caring Place
- Saturday, April 10, 2004 1:39 AM CDT
Thinking of you..
With Love,
The Hammer's
www.caringbridge.com/mn/danielhammer <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Friday, April 9, 2004 8:59 PM CDT
Monica
thank you for wishing my family easter greeting. from my home to yours i wish you a blessed easter. and thank you for your journals thier so so inspirational!!
love abbie
«♥Angel Mitchell♥» <afraser1@tru.eastlink.ca>
- Friday, April 9, 2004 7:52 PM CDT
"And being in Agony, He prayed the longer. And His sweat became as drops of blood, trickling down upon the ground."
HIS suffering was for ALL of US ... Thank you LORD ...
Have a Blessed Easter Monica and Family ... Loving you Gabbie .... THANKING you Gabbie ...
Rebekah Clark <rclark@jrhinc.com>
Prior Lake, MN USA - Friday, April 9, 2004 1:48 PM CDT
Monica, John & family,
I know the holidays are particularly painul for you, I will say extra prayers for your peace. It is comforting to know that one day, God will wipe all of our tears away and the pain and suffering of this life won't matter. But, how difficult it is to get thru some of the hard times in the here and now. May His perfect love and peace lift you up and carry you through this ongoing season of your life. Always, always praying for you.........
Have a blessed Easter, thank you, thank you Jesus, now we can all "be dere"!
Christy <calee59@wi.rr.com>
South Milwaukee, WI - Friday, April 9, 2004 12:28 AM CDT
Dearest Monica,
Thanking Jesus with you today and everyday for His Sacrifice to have a relationship with US! Amazing Love, Amazing Grace.
With All My Love,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Friday, April 9, 2004 6:39 AM CDT
No, we were not there when they crucified our Lord, but He loved us enough to be crucified for ALL of us, even though none of us living today were there. Gabbie asked, "Will you be 'dere?" "Were you there?", and "Will you be 'dere?"....when you think about it, so similar in words, but profoundly different too. No, we were not there Lord, but our knowledge of your Word and our belief in you as our Savior tells us, we will be 'dere!! No, we did not see our Lord crucified, but our faith gives us the hope, and that hope is a promise from God, that we will be 'dere with you St. Gabbie!! Monica, thank you for having such a beautiful site to share God's love with others.
In His love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Thursday, April 8, 2004 10:32 PM CDT
Monica, just dropping by as I occasionally do and my heart is just bursting with joy. What an exciting, wonderful heritage is ours because of Jesus. Yes, yes, yes, bless and praise His holy Name!!!
Yolanda Rogers, Mom to Anna, http://www.galatians5.com - <galatians5@truevine.net>
Altamonte Springs, FL USA - Thursday, April 8, 2004 7:12 PM CDT
Monic and John,
I'm thinking of your family so much as the Easter Holiday approaches. My heart breaks for the emormous empty space in your hearts. I know every day is a struggle but holiday are surely even worse.
Please know that I am thinking of you and praying for you.
The website is lovely--you do such an amazing job with it and this easter one is no exception.
Take Gentle Care of Yourselves..
God Bless,
Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Thursday, April 8, 2004 6:23 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
I am so sorry for the cross you have to carry, and also so many others on Caringbridge. I wish there was more to say than I am sorry, but I know nothing else to say. I do pray for you and John to be happy in this life.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Thursday, April 8, 2004 2:46 PM CDT
Dearest Monica,
I'm so sorry as always that your heart hurts so much, and especially at holidays that must be incredibly difficult, I can't begin to imagine. Please know that you are always in my prayers and that will be especially true this weekend.
I love you Monica- Loving Gabbie with you today and everyday.
All of My Love,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Thursday, April 8, 2004 1:10 PM CDT
Monica, I am still checking in daily. I often wonder why things happen, why certain people bare certain crosses? I won't pretend that I can even imagine what you are going through. You and Jen Buckentine (and Gabbie and Zack) are on my mind more than I can say. I'm sure the holiday's are horrible for you, even the holiday that celebrates eternal life. Although our human existance doesn't understand many things, it understands love. Although I will never understand why God allows children to suffer, I believe that he loves them and when he feels they cannot endure anymore, he calls them home. I am very sorry for this cross that you, and unfortunately, many others bare. I am still in awe of your faith.
Rhonda Meyer <rschultz@scl.doc.state.mn.us>
- Thursday, April 8, 2004 1:10 PM CDT
Monica & John,
Even Simon of Cyrene had to be forced to carry the cross, but towards the end of his walk he underwent great conversion. I KNOW you would take any other cross than the death of your child...why God does it have to be this way????? Thank you for your faithful witness in your pain, may the Easter resurrection offer some solace this weekend. Praying for you my dear! Love,
Cathy & st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@earthlink.com>
st. paul, mn - Thursday, April 8, 2004 10:38 AM CDT
Thinking of you and praying that your Easter weekend be most blessed.
Love, Michelle & family
Clear Lake, WI - Thursday, April 8, 2004 7:19 AM CDT
Hi Monica - I know it's been a long time since I've signed in or emailed you. Please know I always think of Gabbie and you and your family - your never far from my mind and heart. I wish the holidays weren't so hard for you - but I understand how they can be. I personally have started dreading most holidays - just because of the commercialization of it all. It seems the true meaning gets lost with the majority of society. Or maybe it just seems that way when you see all that the stores have to offer. Well, I better go but just wanted to say hi and thank you for continuing to share the Word. Love,
Mari Beth Ross <jerryandmaribethross@comcast.net>
Hugo, MN - Wednesday, April 7, 2004 10:54 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
Thank you for sharing the truth of Jesus so openly and clearly. You are amazing. I'm glad that Noah is feeling better.
Monica I'm so glad we're friends and even more than that sisters in Christ because of Jesus's Death on the Cross.
With All My Love,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Tuesday, April 6, 2004 7:09 AM CDT
Just a quick note from your (retired) nurse friend - Noah walking in socks or even bare feet is just fine. Some pediatricians even encourage not worrying about the shoes indoors! I love Gabbie's smile on the main page. And those beautiful eyes!! I'm a little anxious about Aaron's two year check-up this Wednesday (4/7) A prayer for peace for his mom would be ever so much appreciated!
Thanking Jesus ALL week for dying for me.......Love, Kathy
Kathy Welch <abbysmamaa@yahoo.com>
Lexington, Ohio - Monday, April 5, 2004 7:36 PM CDT
Hi Monica,
Just wanted to say that I am happy to hear Noah is feeling
much better!
And also am happy to hear he is sleeping well through the night! (as one mother to another--I know that is a welcomed acheivement :o)
Love and Support Always--
Your friend,
Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Monday, April 5, 2004 7:32 PM CDT
Monica,
Sooooo good to talk with you Saturday night, thank you for listening to me and being such a strong shoulder to cry on. Poor little Noah Man and his little "cherry"! I hope he'll heal up quickly :( .
I'm thinking of Gabbie and her wise little looks today...God truly graced her with peace and love in her all-too-short life.
Love to you,
Cathy & st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@earthlink.com>
st. paul, mn - Monday, April 5, 2004 5:17 PM CDT
Thinking of you today Monica ... thinking of you everyday Gabrielle ... thanking you everyday ...
Rebekah Clark <rclark@jrhinc.com>
Prior Lake, MN USA - Monday, April 5, 2004 3:06 PM CDT
Monica-
Just stopping by to say hello, and tell you I was thinking of you.
In Him.
Kelly, Samuel J's mama
http://www.caringbridge.org/pa/samuelj
Kelly Johnson
Pittsburgh, PA USA - Monday, April 5, 2004 11:25 AM CDT
Dearest Monica,
I'm glad that you were able to make it to your grief support group and share with the other Moms. I hope Noah gets to feeling better, tummy virsues are no fun. Give him a big hug from me.
I'm so sorry for you and all the Moms who are missing their babies here on earth.
Loving Gabbie with you today and everyday!
All my Love,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus , Ohio - Monday, April 5, 2004 7:03 AM CDT
Hi Monica, I am glad you had a brother in law like that in your lives. I hope your meetings are allowing you grieving moms to form friendships and help each other... and I hope you dont get any more members...
Chris ~ Gooch's Site ~
- Sunday, April 4, 2004 2:31 PM CDT
Hello Monica
Thankyou for visiting Kaitlyns website, and yes, little Gabbie reminds me of Kaitlyn.
Gabbie is remembered and loved.
You do a beautiful job on this site. So honest and open. Keep up the good work.
Love to you all.
Colleen - Kaitlyns mum
www.caringbridge.org/ne/kaitlyn
Colleen <ozi_gal@hotmail.com>
Rockingham, WA Australia - Sunday, April 4, 2004 9:36 AM CDT
Monica,
What a meaningful story you share about the sincerity and love from your brother in law and his girlfriend.
That must have meant the world to you.
Thank you for sharing it.
And you are soooo right. Sincerity is the greatest gift.
What a blessing.
Love,
Sara
www.caringbridge.com/mn/danielhammer <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Friday, April 2, 2004 11:26 AM CST
Dearest Monica,
Thank you for sharing the quote from Oslwald Chambers, I like him too. :) I'll be praying for your Mom's group on Saturday, I'm sure it helps to talk and share with others who understand as only they can.
I think of you all the time and pray for you too!
With All my Love,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Friday, April 2, 2004 11:19 AM CST
Wow! Your quote from Oswald Chambers cuts out all excuses doesn't it. Makes me think about myself. Thanks.
Dianne Goings <dianneg@integraonline.com>
Prior Lake, MN - Friday, April 2, 2004 9:59 AM CST
Monica,
You continue to do such an extraordinary job with Gabbie's website--you really do. And it is so heaping full of love for sweet Gabbie.
I hope little Noah's tummy is better- He sure has had more than his fair share of viruses and yucks--poor little guy.
Well, just wanted to check in and say Hello!
My love and prayers to you all ALWAYS,
Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Thursday, April 1, 2004 8:56 PM CST
hi monica
your note on grief makes complete sense to me, never really thinking of it that way but its true. it scares me to death for someone to say to me mitchell who?? i talk about mitch all the time but people just clam up or a change of subject it drives me mad.i have explained that i love talking about mitch and its not upsetting but more helpful than anything.
abbie «♥Angel Mitchell♥» <afraser1@tru.eastlink.ca>
- Thursday, April 1, 2004 10:13 AM CST
Monica,
How your comment on what grieving mothers do to protect the memory of their children hit me. It is so true...I feel like the protective momma bear only my little cub is in heaven. I'm still "growling" though and making sure her precious little life is still honored. God bless you, Monica! You've been on my heart and in my prayers. I love to see Gabbie's picture each day, she is such a beautiful little saint. Love,
Cathy & st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@earthlink.com>
st. paul, mn - Thursday, April 1, 2004 7:08 AM CST
Dearest Monica,
It's true our World is more filled with hatred and violence every single day. I'm thankful that I have a personal realationship with the God who put the Stars in place and is in complete Control.
So sorry as always that you are missing your sweet, precious Gabbie and I know your heart longs for her each and every day.
Loving and Missing Gabbie with you,
Love to you in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Thursday, April 1, 2004 6:48 AM CST
DEER ST. GABBIE,
MY KITTY, CALLI IS UP IN HEAVEN WITH YOU NOW, I WAS HOPING YOU COULD KEEP AN EYE ON HER SHE'S A VERY SPEACIAL CAT SO I KNOW WHEN YOU TWO MEET YOU'LL GET ALONG VERY WELL AND I KNOW SHE'LL TAKE GOOD CARE OF YOU TOO.
LOVE YOU, YOUR COUSIN LINDSEY
LINDSEY PAQUETTE <LYNDZY917@MSN.COM>
ROBBINSDALE, MN USA - Wednesday, March 31, 2004 7:57 PM CST
Monica, yet again, something I've struggled with you have addressed in your journal. As you know, I have a friend whose 13 month old passed away last year. Through his story I have been both blessed and heartbroken over little ones losing their earthly struggles...even though I know that it is just the ones left behind who are broken hearted. Anyway, the whole "angel" thing isn't exactly what I believe though I know that their souls (little ones included) are worshipping our heavenly father. I just don't think they're bouncing on clouds, etc...that being said, I have NEVER wanted to step on any toes and if that thought brings them comfort...I guess I just don't know what to say so I don't say anything. I know I am rambling but I just never know what to say especially in guestbooks of families that I don't know too well. And I most certainly don't think that you are difficult, just like my friend isn't difficult or anyone I know that has lost their child. As someone else stated, you are in a difficult situation...and I'm sure that at times more than you feel you can bear...but you have turned this most difficult, painful trial into a witnessing opportunity and for that, thank you. God bless!
Robin Boger <Robin.Boger@rbc.com>
Lewisville, NC - Wednesday, March 31, 2004 7:34 PM CST
Dearest Monica,
Thank you for sharing the missionary letter, thank you for reminding us all that glory comes after suffering for sure.
I think of you all the time and pray for you. I love you and Gabbie soo much.
Loving Gabbie with you today and everyday!
With Love in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Wednesday, March 31, 2004 7:26 AM CST
Monica,
Just a thought....I was reading your journal entry for Sunday about people's indifference to Jesus. Once a friend of mine remarked how it is in God's character to honor our wishes about what we will do with Jesus. If we choose to ignore His Son in this life, we have chosen to do the same in the next one. Our choice, not God's. A sobering thought for me for sure! And as for those of us who have grown to love you and Gabbie, I think I can safely say that you are not "difficult" but you have been (and remain) in the most "difficult" of life's situations. Praise God that it was Him you turned to in need and not a worldly solution. Hang in there, you are one more day closer to seeing Gabbie again!
Christy <calee59@wi.rr.com>
S. Milwaukee, WI - Tuesday, March 30, 2004 7:41 PM CST
Dear Monica,
Just comming by to look at Gabbie's beautiful face, remember her and pray for you.
I'm so sorry as always that you are missing Gabbie each and very day until you meet again in Heaven. I can't imagine how difficult it must be for you and of course greiving Mommies are not difficult people.
Thinking of you all the time! Loving Gabbie with you!
Love in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Tuesday, March 30, 2004 7:11 AM CST
Monica, you are an absolutely amazing friend. I went to my mailbox today after work and there was a beautiful note from you. With all that you are going through, you certainly did not have to take the time to send me a note to brighten my day. But thank you, you certainly did. I still have not forgotten about calling you. I am going to because I want to actually speak to you to see how you are, but with the time difference I always seem to think about it too early or too late. Hopefully I'll get to you sometime this week. But, please know that you are in my thoughts and prayers continually. And, I love the new background. Take care and God bless!
Khalita My Caringbridge Site Duke Peds BMT Aplastic Anemia <khalita@hecaresonline.org>
Lexington, NC - Monday, March 29, 2004 3:04 PM CST
That man was my husband's great uncle. Although I never met him, I have heard he was a wonderful person. He was murdered that I know for sure. Thanks for acknowleging the horrible way in which his life ended. I'm still checking in daily and thinking of all of you often.
Rhonda Meyer <rschultz@scl.doc.state.mn.us>
- Monday, March 29, 2004 1:04 PM CST
To Gabbie's Family -
Thank you for sharing this amazing story. I came across Gabbie's website and just couldn't leave without reading everything. I will say a special prayer for you all with my family tonight. I wish you peace and happiness.
Andrea Mills <amills@clear.lakes.com>
Montevideo, MN USA - Monday, March 29, 2004 10:57 AM CST
Dearest Monica,
I'm so glad that Noah is okay, and that John was able to get piece of mind from the Doctor's visit. Yours and Aubrey's day together at work sounds so nice-- out to lunch with Mommy what a great treat.
I'm soo sorry that Gabbie didn't get to laugh or smile during her life one earth, and I'm sorry that your heart aches for her each and every day. I'll always be remembering her until we meet in Heaven.
Love to you in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Monday, March 29, 2004 6:48 AM CST
Monica,
I am glad you and Aubrey were able to spend the day together at work yesterday. Lunch sounds like it was wonderful. Keep making those special memories. I am glad that Noah is fine. You're right! John has every right to be concerned when Noah is not feeling well, and yes, he has every right to take him to the dr. Hopefully, the Dr. is understanding. I am so sorry that Gabbie so seldom laughed and smiled. Praying for you this evening and remembering Gabbie.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Sunday, March 28, 2004 10:45 PM CST
Hi, I'm a friend of Brittany Zipter's. I'm not sure if you knew her, but she is a wonderful girl, and my best friend. She also died of cancer. I know you miss your daughter deaply, but at least she is happier now, and I know Brittany, she will be a great friend to her. I pray for all children with cancer and all families that must watch their kids suffer, every night. I will pray for your family as well as the Zipter's tonight.
Deepest Prayers,
Sarah Wood <todawindo2dawall@yahoo.com>
Tampa, FL USA - Saturday, March 27, 2004 9:44 PM CST
Hi Monica,
Just wanted to let you know that we continue to lift your family up in prayer. We wish for you an abundance of blessings and healing. We have great love and respect for precious Gabbie--She will always remain so very special in our hearts. She has touched so many lives. As have you.
Your faith in Jesus is inspiring.
You remind us that we all need to be instruments of Him.
The new posted picture on the home page is beautiful.
Thank you for sharing that.
With our love, hugs, support, prayers and much respect,
Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Saturday, March 27, 2004 1:20 PM CST
Hello Monica, I was pleased to find Gabbie's site for the first time and send you my good wishes. I have read many of your entries in Steve's guestbook and it's nice to put a face to the name.
I would be honoured to make Gabbie a banner. I will have a good think about what it should say. I think it may turn out very different from many of the others.
I will E-mail you back with it once I have an idea. It may take a couple of weeks but I promise I won't forget your beautiful daughter.
HelenH <geordielass999@hotmail.com>
uk, My CaringBridge Page - Saturday, March 27, 2004 4:50 AM CST
Hello dearest Monica ... thinking of you today and of course of precious Gabbie ... what a sweet picture of the three of you! She looks SO peaceful! Well I thought I would add this short poem for you ... hoping you all have a safe weekend.
There once was a procession of children marching in heaven. Each held a lighted candle, and as they marched they sang. Their faces shone with happiness but one little girl stood alone. "Why don't you join us little girl?" one happy child asked. "I can't", she replied. "Every time I light my candle, my mother puts it out with her tears."
Rebekah Clark <rclark@jrhinc.com>
Prior Lake, MN USA! - Friday, March 26, 2004 2:15 PM CST
Dearest Monica,
Just came by to look at Gabbie's beautiful face, you are in my thoughts and my prayers all of the time. Gabbie's sleeping picture-- how heartbreakingly beautiful. I never even knew Gabbie on earth but I sure do love her and you so much!!
Thinking of you, praying for you, loving and missing Gabbie with you!
My Love as always,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Wish I was closer, Ohio - Friday, March 26, 2004 11:00 AM CST
Monica,
Perfect! Your entry today is awesome! As parents, we are mere reflections of the unfathomable love of Jesus. How our children are perfectly, completely and 100% loved in the arms of Jesus!
God bless you! I'm praying for you today in an extra special way :). Love,
Cathy & st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@earthlink.com>
st. paul, mn - Friday, March 26, 2004 9:12 AM CST
Dear Monica,
As a young child and teen I could not imagine wanting to leave this earth. Now that I have Jesus in my life, my utmost desire is to be with Him. That is not to say that I do not enjoy my life here on earth, but I can honestly say I long for Him. No, I am not suicidal, I just love Jesus more than anything on this earth. I do desire Him more than anything on this earth. I can only believe that as I get older the desire will grow stronger, as my love for Him deepens. Thank you for your entry today, reminding me of how very much I love Him.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Thursday, March 25, 2004 8:18 PM CST
Dearest Monica,
Amen to what you wrote today, those gone on to Heaven don't wish for earth in the least-- they are enjoying the presence of our Savior, what a wonderful truth. Thank you my dear friend for always sharing Jesus and the Truth on Gabbie's website- Oh so refreshing in a world that is truly deceived.
I'm sorry as always that your heart longs for Gabbie here on earth, and thankful that you will have a Heavenly reunion with your precious daughter. I can't wait to meet Gabbie in Heaven myself-- where I have NO DOUBT I'll be through the precious blood of Jesus!
I Love you and Gabbie both so much!
Heather
Heeather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Too Far Away from You, Ohio - Thursday, March 25, 2004 7:45 PM CST
Monica,
How true your entry from today!! And thanks be to God that little ones gone to live with Him are not lonely for their parents - because they have the utmost - they are in His very presence! It is the earthly lives which suffer then, grieving until the reunion that is theirs if they accept the sacrifice made by Christ and repent of their sins. Thank you always for pointing to the truth.
Love, Kathy
Kathy Welch
Lexington, Ohio - Thursday, March 25, 2004 6:39 PM CST
Monica- Just wanted to let you know you were thought about today:) You are such a special person!!!! Here is a Poem that I feel is so very true for both you and John.....
Mother's & Father's Day
It's so very hard to understand
why one so small is taken,
leaving a Mom and Dad behind
with hearts so badly aching.
There are so many things in life
that no one really understands.
But the child you hold in your heart,
God now holds in His hands.
Cared for and nurtured by the Father,
she will grow and mature in His love,
while angels guide and protect her
in her Heavenly home up above.
They will tell her she was, oh, so special
to you both, in every way ~
as they spend countless hours preparing
for your reunion One Grand Day!
They will take her to the edges of Heaven
and let her look, often, down below
to see the Mom and Dad down here
that she didn't get much time to know.
So as you gaze up into the sky,
know she's now in a Glorious place,
and maybe she's looking back to you ~
searching for a smile upon your face.
For I'm certain that in her little heart
it grieves her to see you so sad,
for she knows she had the very best ~
The world's greatest Mom and Dad!
copyright 2002 Ferna Lary Mills
Always
Kim
P.s Gabbie- Wanted to let you know that you were thought about today also. You are so perfect and special words can not describe.
Kimberly Heaton <kimberlyheaton@yahoo.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Thursday, March 25, 2004 4:14 PM CST
I wanted to thank you for posting on my little Cameron's site a while ago. I'm finally getting around to looking at some other sites. Sometimes, I feel so lost and can relate to your statement on grief. Thank you Jeanie mommy to angel Cameron dx. wilm stage 3 unfavorable histology, secondary aml July 2003. 4-17-00 to 12-16-03
Jeanie <mylittlecam@yahoo.com>
- Thursday, March 25, 2004 4:03 PM CST
Monica,
Oh how I can relate to your thoughts on grief. Yes, we say we are fine, but our hearts are so broken and we will never completely heal. But sometimes we don't have the desire or energy to say anything other than "fine." I am glad to hear that you are seeking help at Woodale; I truly hope it is helpful for you.
Thank you for your entry about heaven/playgrounds. It is frustrating to hear people talk about our children frolicking and running around and blowing bubbles and playing. I feel it is making light of the reality of eternity. So thank you for your journal entry about that. Thinking of you very often. May God bless you today.
Love, Jen Buckentine
www.caringbridge.org/mn/zacharyb <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Wednesday, March 24, 2004 9:18 PM CST
A sweet poem for you Monica ... not thinking lightly of lying but sweet none the less ... thinking of you and your family and wishing things were different but then againI am closer to the Lord because things aren't.
Ask my Mom how she is
My Mom, she tells alot of lies
she never did before.
From now until she dies,
she'll tell a whole lot more.
Ask my Mom how she is
and because she can't explain,
She will tell a little lie
because she can't describe the pain.
Ask my Mom how is she,
She'll say "I'm alright."
If that's the truth, then tell me,
why does she cry each night?
Ask my Mom how is she,
she seems to cope so well.
She didn't have a choice you see
nor the strength to yell.
Ask my Mom how she is,
"I'm fine, I'm well, I'm coping."
For Gods sake Mom, just tell the truth
just say your heart is broken.
She'll love me all her life,
I loved her all of mine.
But if you ask her how is she
she'll lie and say she's fine.
I am here in Heaven.
I cannot hug from here.
If she lies to you don't listen,
Hug her and hold her near.
On the day we meet again,
we'll smile and I'll be bold.
I'll say, "You're lucky to get in here, Mom
with all the lies you told!"
Rebekah Clark <rclark@jrhinc.com>
Prior Lake , MN USA! - Wednesday, March 24, 2004 2:55 PM CST
What a beautiful photo of Gabbie. I love this the best of all I have seen. I am praying.
Dianne <dianneg@integraonline.com>
Prior Lake, MN - Wednesday, March 24, 2004 1:06 PM CST
Thank you for your continued journeling and sharing--I have so much respect for you.
Please know that you guys are always in our hearts and in our prayers.
Love,
Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Wednesday, March 24, 2004 12:10 AM CST
Monica,
How thankful I am for your friendship and for YOU...simply YOU being YOU is a gift. You are made in His image and He takes great delight in His creation!
Thanks for the BreakPoint link, I had actually seen the article that Chuck referenced in the paper and had also read Albom's book. I agree with their commentaries...it will be about praising God and living in His love.
God bless you dear sister in Christ! Much love and prayers,
Cathy & st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@earthlink.com>
st. paul, mn - Wednesday, March 24, 2004 9:37 AM CST
Dearest Monica,
Just here reading and praying for you as I always do- I think of you and sweet Gabbie all the time! Thank you for sharing Jesus in your grief and reaching out to help others too-- you my dear sister in Christ are such a wonderful missionary and I count it my honor to know you!!
I LOVE you and Gabbie so very much!! Praying for you!!
Love to you in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Much to far away Ohio, - Tuesday, March 23, 2004 8:41 PM CST
Monica~
AMEN to what you wrote about heaven and playgrounds!!!! It IS all about GOD, not us!!! Sharing in your love of our Lord and in your grief for our babies....
Ivy Ervin Forever Missing Luke <ivymeadows@earthlink.net http://caringbridge.org/oh/lukeervin>
Mansfield, Ohio - Tuesday, March 23, 2004 7:59 PM CST
Monica,
How we LOVE St. Gabbie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! How we love you and your family!!!!!!! We are holding you extra close today in prayer, may God be with you and your broken heart.
Cathy & st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@earthlink.com>
st. paul, mn - Tuesday, March 23, 2004 3:01 PM CST
Hi Monica,
I check this site as one of the first things I do every morning. I can't imagine your pain and sorrow.
Someone else I know online has a daughter that was just diagnosed with ALL. They are having Ebay auctions to raise funds. Their other child has problems as well.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&category=13771&item=3282948838
Thinking of you and your precious Gabbie,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshsb4@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Tuesday, March 23, 2004 1:19 PM CST
Good morning Monica! I am praying for you this morning. I pray for strength and peace to shower you. I dont know that we will ever meet on this earth but "I will be dere" when He comes back. Praise the Lord for that promise. In His love,
JoBeth Hunnicutt <jobedu@alltel.net>
Moultrie, Ga USA - Tuesday, March 23, 2004 7:33 AM CST
Good morning Monica! I am praying for you this morning. I pray for strength and peace to shower you. I dont know that we will ever meet on this earth but "I will be dere" when He comes back. Praise the Lord for that promise. In His love,
JoBeth Hunnicutt <jjobedu@alltel.net>
Moultrie, Ga USA - Tuesday, March 23, 2004 7:32 AM CST
Hello Monica and John:
I just wanted to pass on my love not only for Gabbie but for you two as well. I continue to pray for you all.
May God guide you,
Christine Hay <barryhay@comcast.net>
Corcoran, MN - Tuesday, March 23, 2004 6:38 AM CST
Monica, please know that you are constantly in my thoughts and prayers. You know, sometimes it isn't that we are avoiding help so much as it is that we are preparing to receive it. SO much of this Christian walk is about being able to and in a position to receive what the Lord has to offer us and sometimes it takes us a while of struggling with the Lord before we are ready to receive it. I'm so glad that your prayers have been answered and the Lord has placed you in a church where you can get the help you need. No doubt this is why the Lord led you to transfer to this church, this is where He wanted you to receive what He had for you in your next steps. A verse that has been on my heart lately is "as for the Lord, His way is perfect" and I trust that to be true as He continues to grow and heal you. Not only do you reach out to others in spite of being broken (you have touched so many lives for Christ already)--you will be able to reach out to others BECAUSE you have been broken--same as Jesus--"tempted in every way, yet without sin". I know none of us are sinless, but, like Jesus, we get better at helping others when we let Jesus help us through our hard times. He sympathizes with our weaknesses which is what makes Him such an awesome Savior. And it is what makes awesome servants in the likeness of Jesus--you are an awesome servant. I will call you sometime soon...just to chat. I am honored to call you my sister in Christ :) In the meantime, please know that you are CONSTANTLY in my thoughts and prayers. Oh, and thanks for mentioning the issues with A&F. As a youth minister one of my responsibilities is to keep up with things like this and let both kids & parents know (which does not go over well sometimes unfortunately), so I have been praying on this issue for YEARS and it's so refreshing to see someone else mention it publicly as you did. Thank you so much for continuing to serve the Lord in your grief. You will surely be rewarded greatly in both this life and the next.
Khalita My Caringbridge Site Duke Peds BMT Aplastic Anemia <khalita@hecaresonline.org>
Lexington, NC - Monday, March 22, 2004 11:20 PM CST
Yes, Monica, I am one of many who love precious Gabrielle and have been blessed by her sweet story and her Mama's undying devotion. I am so thankful for Caringbridge for most likely we would have never met during this lifetime. I am also thankful in your undying love for God and using this site not only as a tribute to your beautiful daughter but witnessing at the same time. If we don't ever get the opportunity to meet, we will surely meet in heaven as I will be dere too! God bless! :)
Robin Boger <Robin.Boger@rbc.com>
Lewisville, NC - Monday, March 22, 2004 9:43 PM CST
I love that picture of Gabbie. Wild curls and a sweet face. You are in our thoughts.
Jennifer Yseth <jennifer.yseth@gbe.com>
Brookings, SD 57006 - Monday, March 22, 2004 8:30 PM CST
Good afternoon Sweet Gabbie ... I found myself stopping in quite a bit today just to see your face. Oh how I wish your earthy body was still here to squeeze. I ache for your momma and I ache for all the children suffering! It looks like you will have a new angle soon ... poor Jacob is not doing well and may be there soon. I wish I had the answers but I don't. All I can do is follow the path I have chosen and pray ... thanks you Monica for teaching us all SO much ...
I look forward to seeing you someday Gabbie ... I have a purpose!
Rebekah Clark <rclark@jrhinc.com>
Prior Lake, MN USA! - Monday, March 22, 2004 4:47 PM CST
Monica- I still check on you daily, it's just been awhile since I left you a message. The picture of Gabbie you posted took my breath away she is so beautiful, way to beautiful for life here. You continue to amaze me with your faith and love that you share w/ so many people all around the world. I know exactly where Gabbie gets her beautiful presence from. I found another poem that I hope you don't mind me sharing w/ you, some poems just take words right out of my mouth and couldn't be said better. I hope every day that passes puts a smile on your face knowing that's one day closer to your/everyone's precious Gabbie(I say everyone because she is loved by so many people and we all can't wait to be w/ her also). Please continue to be yourself because you are a wonderful person.
In This Time Of Sorrow
The day has come~
All be it far too soon, I know,
to surrender unto God
this one that you loved so.
No amount of words,
no matter how be they wise,
can take away the pain
when someone so special dies.
Grief is such a personal thing
we each accept in our own way.
My heart can only guess
what yours feels today.
I am sorry for your sorrow.
But, I do understand your tears.
For, we all suffer parting
if we've lived enough years.
Try to remember, if you can,
that, someday, you will again meet
(they truly are waiting there)
when we join them at Jesus' feet.
I pray, in time, the tears will pass
and a smile takes their place;
as your heart begins to heal,
by God's amazing Grace.
Copyright 2003 by:Sandy Griffin
P.s Gabbie- There is not a day that goes by where I don't think of you, you remind me so much of my own daughter especially w/ that beautiful curly hair. You truely are a SAINT and I can't wait to see you that glorious day, please be waiting for me because I WILL BE DERE!!!
With love
Kim
Kimberly Heaton <kimberlyheaton@yahoo.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Monday, March 22, 2004 1:10 PM CST
Dearest Monica,
Another heartbreakingly beautiful picture of your beautiful Gabbie. Thank you for sharing Jesus so openly here on Gabbie's site. I think of you all the time!
With My Love in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Monday, March 22, 2004 6:49 AM CST
Monica,
The likeness is uncanny, but what a beautiful, gentle reminder of your little one. I read some of your suggested research on A&F.....yuck, I knew they had some questionable marketing approaches, but this seems like an outright attack on our children! It is so sad to say, but the world is a sewer that must absolutely break God's heart. I work in a probation/parole office and it never ceases to amaze me what we humans can do to one another. Have things really changed at all since the days of Sodom and Gomorrah?? I think not and we have to be aware of the fact our time is growing shorter. When I read of things such as this, all I can think is "come Lord Jesus and come now"!!! But.....I know so many who aren't ready yet. I pray for eyes to see and the courage to reach out to those who are lost. Coming here always encourages me to try and do better. Don't stop telling it like it is!
Christy <calee59@wi.rr.com>
South Milwaukee, WI - Sunday, March 21, 2004 10:20 PM CST
Monica -
Thank you for including a link to Maddie's site. (yes, Maddie was adopted by our family, just like Taryn) Your journal is an insperation, and Gabbie's eyes luminous in every picture, such a beautiful child.
Forever praying for you.
Phyllis and Maddie <prc7186@aol.com>
Hamilton, NJ USA - Sunday, March 21, 2004 11:41 AM CST
Monica,
Unbelievable likeness! Thank you as always for sharing pictures and memories of your precious little saint!
Love, Kathy
Kathy Welch <abbysmamaa@yahoo.com>
Lexington Ohio, Ohio - Friday, March 19, 2004 8:09 PM CST
Monica,
Thank you so much, you are so sweet, for including Connor's link in your update earlier in the week. We sincerely appreciate that. Also, thank you for the eye-opener regarding A&F. I've never shopped there, but certainly wouldn't support them now, under any circumstances. I, too, did a little research via the web after reading what you wrote. All I can say is, UNBELIEVEABLE! It disgusts me to think that this is so commonplace now, AND ACCEPTABLE BY SOME. Thank the good Lord up above that "this world is not my home...I'm only passing through".
You truly do have a ministry here with Gabbie's site, thank you for enriching my life. May you all have a wonderful weekend!
Love, hugs and prayers,
Rhonda Hunley, Connor's Mom
**Connor's page**
<rshunley@comcast.net>
Hendersonville, TN God Bless America! - Friday, March 19, 2004 5:36 PM CST
Monica-
Wow. The resemblance of Gabbie's picture and your Saint
stamp is amazing!
Jill <willycj@msn.com>
- Friday, March 19, 2004 4:11 PM CST
Monica I don't always sign in because I don't know what to say but I do check your sight everyday, my heart yearns for gods knowlege and you certainly have helped me a great deal especialy about faith. I always think about you guys and keep you close to my heart. I know I've told you this before Gabbie is such a special little girl to me and I hope I get to meet her someday. God bless as always
Sally Torres <sally_torres@lusknet.com>
Anaheim, ca - Friday, March 19, 2004 3:53 PM CST
"But now that he is dead, why should I fast? Can I bring him back again? I will go to him, but he will not return to me." 2 Samuel 12:23
Monica,
I just put this passage on Theresa's site and you remind me again of its importance. We do need to accept Jesus and all He did for us! Thanks be to God for the gift of heaven and the promise that we will see our beautiful children again. We can hardly wait for that day, can we?! I so appreciate your journal entries and look forward to reading them each day. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and memories with us.
With love & blessings,
Cathy & st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@earthlink.com>
st. paul, mn - Friday, March 19, 2004 10:05 AM CST
Dearest Monica,
Thank you so much for sharing part of the sermon on suffering. Thank you for continuing to share Jesus on Gabbie's site~ I'm sorry too Gabbie that you had to suffer so much in your short life on earth, thankful that you are suffering no longer, but grieving with and for your Mommy as she faces each day without you.
I love you Monica, I'm so glad you're my sister in the Lord.
Love to you,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Thursday, March 18, 2004 6:52 AM CST
I stop by frequently because your journal is always a breath of spiritual fresh air, but today's message was the Lord speaking through you to me. Thank you for letting Him use you in the lives of so many others. I will be praying for your ongoing ministry through St. Gabby's site.
Glad to hear that Noah is doing so well.
Stephanie and RachelJoy <sstrom@quik.com>
- Wednesday, March 17, 2004 9:22 PM CST
Hi Monica! Thanks again for the "daily Word" it is definately food for my soul and I am sure for many others. "God is good all the time" is something that I have always remembered hearing but I sometimes struggle to remember it during tough times. Thanks for your updates.
JoBeth Hunnicutt <jobedu@alltel.net>
Moultrie, Ga USA - Wednesday, March 17, 2004 9:03 PM CST
Monica,
Thank you for including the link to St. Luke's site. It is a blessing to know his family. They are an inspiration to so many. They are (most importantly) tremendous witnesses for Christ. I am honored to call you and Ivy friends and sisters in Christ.
Love, Kathy
Kathy Welch <abbysmamaa@yahoo.com>
Lexington, Ohio - Wednesday, March 17, 2004 7:26 PM CST
Hi Monica,
Thank you for sending me back to St. Lukie's site. They are a wonderful family, and I followed Luke for quite awhile. With a busy schedule, and following other children on Caringbridge, I am ashamed to admit I had forgotten about the Ervin family. What a wonderful Christian family they are!!
I was blessed with someone alerting me about A & F before my children started wearing the clothing, or I may have fallen into the trap. I am so grateful God put that person in my path that day. I have to tell you a funny, and not so funny story about judging people and their clothing. When my now 16 year old son was about 5 yrs. old, we told him that we felt it was not appropriate to wear cartoon character shirts to church. We felt it was more respectful to our Lord to dress otherwise. Well, little did we know that our 5 year old was judging every other child that was wearing cartoon character clothing to church until one day he mentioned he had told someone they should not wear that shirt to church anymore. Oh my gosh, I was appalled that my child would have done such a thing to another child, especially at church. Little did we know that our "teaching" him what we thought was being respectful to God, had made him judgemental of others. OUCH!! We quickly let him know that was only "our" feeling and that others could feel differently, and God would not disapprove of a cartoon character shirt. Now I do know that God would disapprove of an A & F shirt, but we have to remember that many people still do not know. I have mentioned to people, I felt I could, and almost everyone has said that they had no idea. It still bothers my son to this day, to see even a grown man with a Mickey Mouse tie on at church. Doesn't that just show you how we influence our children so much at a young age!! Now as I have gotten older, I think we were probably a little too strict about the dress of a five year old, but live and learn. I was never judgemental of other children's clothing, I just didn't have my children wearing it. Unfortunately, my son became judgemental of that, because of what we did with him. One good thing though, he also has strong beliefs about many things that God would disapprove of in this world, and can be very vocal about it at times. It is a fallen world we live in and we as parents strive to do our best to teach them what God would want us to teach them. Thank you for not being judgemental of the child with A & F on, but by still being strong enough in your faith to alert people to it on Gabbie's web site. So many have NO idea about this company.
I am so sorry that time passes slowly for you as the world around you moves so quickly. I pray for you and your family often.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Wednesday, March 17, 2004 11:40 AM CST
Monica,
Thank you for letting us know about A&F. I had no idea how bad it was-- I feel sick to my stomach after finding and reading an article online about their 2003 catalog. I worry almost unrelentlessly about the future for our children too. We just need to do our best to teach about the Lord now and hope and pray they do the right things when older. Thank you for another eye-opening entry.
Sara Freking
<sfrek1214@charter .net>
MN - Wednesday, March 17, 2004 9:10 AM CST
Monica,
I agree with you. Society and parents need to stop turning the other cheek about the pornographic messages that surround our kids; an accurate example being from that by Abercrombie. Many parents honestly may not have known about this or seen their catalog--so THANK YOU for pointing it out so maybe a few more parents will stop spending their money there. I actually wish you would have said something discreetly/privately and lovingly to the mom at church--NOT to judge or criticize but to let them know something they really may not have known. I think you would have found a very appreciative and enlightened mom.
Thank you, Monica, for always getting us to think about things.
a friend <afriend@yahoo.com>
- Wednesday, March 17, 2004 8:48 AM CST
Happy 1st. Birthday to Noah, although it's a little late! Monica, I am appalled at what I found searching the web about Abercrombie...I had no idea! My children are still wearing Gymboree, etc. and I just had no idea. Thank you for sharing all you learn with your web family and especially for sharing your love for God.
Robin Boger <Robin.Boger@rbc.com>
Lewisville, NC - Wednesday, March 17, 2004 7:54 AM CST
Dear Monica,
Thank you so much for visiting our site. My troubles seem pale by comparison to the ordeal you've experienced. I am so deeply sorry for your loss. Gabrielle is a beautiful child, and I can't imagine what it must be like without her. I wish I could take away your grief or your sorrow. I wish there was a way to fill the emptiness you must feel, and yet, there is nothing which could fill the void left behind by your sweet baby. I will keep you in our prayers for peace in the troubled moments, comfort in the painful times and joy as you reminisce the special experiences you shared together.
lori hurley (www.caringbridge.com/mn/noahhurley) <clowns@myhometown.net>
north st paul, mn - Tuesday, March 16, 2004 10:34 PM CST
Dearest Monica,
Wanted you to know that I was here reading and praying for you. Thank you for sharing Jesus so openly here on Gabbie's site. My heart breaks with yours as I see so many being decieved by what the world says. Jesus is the Only Way, The Only Truth, The Only Light for a dark world.
I'm so sorry as always for your missing Gabbie, and longing for her here on earth.
Loving Gabbie with you today and always.
With All my Love,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@Insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Tuesday, March 16, 2004 7:39 PM CST
Happy Belated Birthday, precious little Noah!! You are such a precious gift! (Not to mention a real cutie pie too!)
Love, prayers, and support to all of you--ALWAYS!!!!!
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Tuesday, March 16, 2004 5:35 PM CST
As a fellow grieving and hopeful mother, I look forward to your journal entries each day. As the mother of a teenager, I'm glad you were able to stop yourself from judging the family of the boy wearing the A & F t-shirt. What's more important is that the boy was attending church with his family.
Patty, mom to angel Jonathan
- Tuesday, March 16, 2004 2:41 PM CST
Hi Monica,
Sending hugs and prayers your way. I really enjoy reading your journal entries. You have inspired me. I hope to make it to the group on April 3rd. Until then, God bless and be good to yourself.
Sandy Jergens <sandyjerg@aol.com www.caringbridge.com/mn/masonjergens>
Delano, MN - Tuesday, March 16, 2004 12:11 AM CST
Dearest Monica,
Thankful with you that our Savior Jesus is truly the author, finisher and perfector of our Faith. It truly is all about Him working in and through us.
I'm so glad that you had a fun party with Noah-- and that book sounds adorable.
So sorry as always that you are missing and longing for Gabbie here on earth-- so thankful for the Promise of Heaven that will be a long hello!
Loving Gabbie with you!
My Love in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Monday, March 15, 2004 10:43 AM CST
Happy Happy Birthday little Noah!! Your sister, Gabbie, would be very proud of you. Monica and John, thinking of you like always. Thank you for continuing to journal and share the Word of God.
Love, Jen, Bill, Brady and Saint Zachary Buckentine
www.caringbridge.orb/mn/zacharyb <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Sunday, March 14, 2004 2:04 PM CST
forever drawn to gabbies site, your words help in so many ways. thank you ever so much
abbie
«♥Angel Mitchell♥» <afraser1@tru.eastlink.ca>
- Saturday, March 13, 2004 10:33 PM CST
Monica and family,
First off, HAPPY BIRTHDAY NOAH!! We pray many many more for you!!
Secondly, the picture of Gabbie and her grandpa is precious. It brought tears to my eyes and my heart aches along with yours for our children... "will you be dere?"... Oh how we wish we could be sweet babies!!!! Lukie (at the end) would beg "you go too mama"... My heart is broken... With sisterly hugs to you Monica... Love Ivy
Ivy Ervin Forever Missing Luke <ivymeadows@earthlink.net http://caringbridge.org/oh/lukeervin>
Mansfield, OH - Saturday, March 13, 2004 8:09 PM CST
Monica,
Beautiful picture of your dad and Gabbie! Praying that you will (in due time, of course:) experience the wonder and joy of grandchildren. I'm praying that I'll have more than one! But Abigail does have the advantage of having me all to herself. Hope you have a great weekend, have kicked the sinus infection, and enjoy your baby turning one!
Love, Kathy
Kathy Welch <abbysmamaa@yahoo.com>
Lexington, Ohio - Friday, March 12, 2004 9:29 PM CST
Wow! Hard to believe Noah is already 1 yr. old. Happy Birthday sweetie. I hope this is a special day with special memories for all of the Paquette's. Monica, the picture of Gabbie and her Grandpa holding her had is precious. I can see why you were frantically searching for it. I am so glad that you found it. Prayers to your family always.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Friday, March 12, 2004 8:53 PM CST
Monica,
I know you don't know me but Zachary Buckentine went to my children's daycare and thats how I came across the story of your precious baby Gabbie.I love the picture of her and Grandpa.His smile is so sweet as he holds her hand.I also work as a radiation therapist so of course cancer patients have a very special spot in my heart.I can only imagine what you have gone through but please know I am thinking of, and praying for you and your family.
Kristi Leusink <hkleusink@aol.com>
Paynesville, MN - Friday, March 12, 2004 7:15 PM CST
LITTLE NOAH MAN...
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU...HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU...
HAPPY BIRTHDAY SWEET NOAH...HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!!
Sending you lots of Angel Hugs & Kisses !!!
Give Mommy, Daddy & Miss Aubrey a HUGE hug from me..
Lots of love
Angel Sheryl
Monica~
The picture on the the front brought instant tears!
Thinking of you always~
We leave in 8 days to go to Texas to see Abby, I am so hoping that this little girl holds on until I get there....
I will also be meeting little Henry whom I haven't met yet..
http://www.caringbridge.org/wa/henryharten
and then on our way home we will be seeing my little man Jaxon, I met him a couple of years ago..
http://www.caringbridge.org/ar/jaxon
I am so excited to go, but very scared for Abby!
Sending all my love to you all
Angel Sheryl
Sheryl Gunzenhauser <mik181@mchsi.com>
Winnebago, Mn - Friday, March 12, 2004 5:58 PM CST
HAPPY BIRTHDAY NOAH!!!! :) I hope you have a fun happy birthday today.
It seems incredible that he already turned one it seems like he was just born not to long ago. It's amazing how times fly's. I hope the whole family has a fun time celebrating, I know you'll be missing Gabie and wishing she was sharing it with you guys, just remember that Gabbie is with her heavenily father there thats loves her so much and is taking good care of her, and when the times comes to be reunited you'll be doing lots more celebrating in heaven together again as a family. Love you guys god bless.
Sally Torres <sally_torres@lusknet.com>
Anaheim, ca - Friday, March 12, 2004 5:55 PM CST
Happy 1st Birthday Noah!!!! Hope today is an extra-special day for you! You have a special family who love you so very much!
Love, hugs and prayers,
Rhonda Hunley, Connor's Mom
**Connor's page**
<rshunley@comcast.net>
Hendersonville, TN
Happy Birthday to You!
Happy Birthday to You!
Happy Birthday Dear Noah!
Happy Birthday to YOU!!!
Happy, Happy 1st Birthday Noah Gabriel!!! Please have Mommy give you soo many kisses all over your face from me! I love to do that to babies so they giggle and laugh!!
All of my Love today and always,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Friday, March 12, 2004 2:29 PM CST
Little Noah man is already one year old? Wow - where has the time gone. Monica, please give him a big old hug from me today, will you?
Love,
Mari Beth Ross <jerryandmaribethross@comcast.net>
Hugo, MN - Friday, March 12, 2004 1:00 PM CST
HAPPY BIRTHDAY NOAH!!!
Hugs and kisses from snowy Ohio! I thank God for the blessing that you are to your mama and daddy and how they honored Gabbie with the middle name that they chose for you.
Love, Kathy
Kathy Welch <abbysmamaa@yahoo.com>
Lexington, Ohio - Friday, March 12, 2004 12:32 AM CST
Happy 1st Birthday Naoh ...
Rebekah Clark <rclark@jrhinc.com>
Prior Lake, MN - Friday, March 12, 2004 10:26 AM CST
Monica,
You're right, we never do know when we'll die and what a great trust we put in Our Lord. What bliss we were all in the day before our children were diagnosed, never thinking that anything so horrible could happen to our pure babies. The Lord knows though and in that we trust. We have so much to learn from the peaceful trust of Sts. Gabbie and Theresa...they were so long-suffering and trusting of Jesus. May we be blessed with gentle heavenly hugs from them today...how we miss them, Jesus. Love,
Cathy & st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@earthlink.com>
st. paul, mn - Friday, March 12, 2004 8:21 AM CST
Dear John, Monica, Aubrey, Noah and St. Gabbie,
We just want to say Happy 1st Birthday to Noah! He is truly a blessing.
Love from the Nielsens
Nielsen <ekimnielsen@msn.com>
- Friday, March 12, 2004 7:57 AM CST
Dear Monica,
Thanks for sharing the beautiful picture of Gabbie with the flowers and for mentioning Steve. Every time I look at the picture, it takes my breath away. Gabbie will always have a special place in my heart.
Love, Janine
Janine Nielsen www.caringbridge.org/page/stevenielsen <ekimnielsen@msn.com>
- Friday, March 12, 2004 7:54 AM CST
Dearest Monica,
Just stopping by today to see Gabbie's beautiful face. Praying for you, Loving Gabbie with you today and everday my sister!
Love in Christ's Amazing Grace and Love,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Thursday, March 11, 2004 2:06 PM CST
Hey Monica. Please don't worry about taking a long time. When we started I knew that this was something that would happen in the Lord's timing and it will continue to be so. We may have times where we send out LOTS and times when few are sent. God knows who needs to receive what when and I have no doubt that every single package will be on time. Just email or call when you are finished and I'll let you know where we are for the next set. Also, please know that I am praying for you continually. I am so sorry I haven't called you back yet, but things have been very busy. We will talk once this round of books/bibles/CDs is finished ok? Blessings and much love to you in Christ. I always love to read your entries.
Khalita My Caringbridge Site Duke Peds BMT Aplastic Anemia <khalita@hecaresonline.org>
Lexington, NC - Thursday, March 11, 2004 8:06 AM CST
Monica,
Can you please pray for some new parents with broken hearts? This couple gave birth at 26 weeks to beautiful twin boys...one of them, Dominic, has gone home to Jesus. (caringbridge.org/mn/rodrigueztwins/ ) It is so difficult to lose any of these precious little ones. Love,
Cathy & st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@mailstation.com>
st. paul, mn - Wednesday, March 10, 2004 9:23 PM CST
Dearest Precious Aubrey,
You my dear are understanding and seeking things so many grown ups do not. What wonderful words-- Jesus did indeed come out of love for All of us. Your Mommy and Daddy really want you to know and come to love Jesus, and I know that they are giving you great instruction in how to do just that.
With all My Love to you because of Jesus's Love for me,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@Insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Wednesday, March 10, 2004 7:40 PM CST
Dear Miss Aubrey,
I just know how your words and drawing swelled your mama's heart with love and joy. For I know that knowing what Jesus did for you - and me - and loving Him is really all that your mama prays for in your life. And she and your daddy are giving you such a great example!
Love, Kathy
Kathy Welch <abbysmamaa@yahoo.com>
Lexington, Ohio - Wednesday, March 10, 2004 7:34 PM CST
Dear Monica,
Those sweet signs from our Gracious God and Father mean so much don't they? I'm so glad you were able to find the picture of Gabbie and your Dad-- I'd love to see it! Hope you're feeling better today. Rest and Get Well Soon my Dear friend. Loving Gabbie with you today and everyday- I can't WAIT to meet her in Heaven!
Love to you in Christ's Grace and Love,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Wednesday, March 10, 2004 6:44 AM CST
Monica,
I'm finally "on-line" at home (welcome us to this century!) :). I really was touched by your parallels with the movie on the Passion...your details are so real and so very painful. We will see beautiful Gabbie and Theresa again..and how inexplicably beautiful they will be. Thank you for mentioning Theresa and her site today...I feel so loved. God bless you in your pain. Love in Christ,
Cathy & st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@mailstation.com>
St. Paul, MN - Tuesday, March 9, 2004 6:06 PM CST
Hi Monica- It has been awhile since I signed the guest book
but I continue this journey with you every single day.
Remembering Gabbie end of March...during lent...terminal.
Praying morning, noon and night for little Lakota.
Jill <willycj@msn.com>
- Tuesday, March 9, 2004 3:38 PM CST
Dear Monica,
Just here reading and praying for you. I'm so sorry for all that Gabbie had to endure during her illness and death, no child should have to suffer, it's so unfair. I'm sorry that Gabbie isn't here with you on earth. I'm thankful that you have the Hope and Promise of seeing Gabbie again in Heaven.
Thinking of you daily my dear friend!! I love you and Gabbie so much!!
Love to you in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Tuesday, March 9, 2004 10:56 AM CST
Monica - You have left me speechless. You have shown me a pain no mother should have to bear. You also show me a faith that is unshakable. Thank you...........
Tammy Holston <tsholston@bellsouth.net>
Roswell, GA - Tuesday, March 9, 2004 6:46 AM CST
Dear Monica,
I wept for you today as I read your entry. I no longer weep for Gabbie because she is home. I am so very sorry for the pain you and John have had to endure, but am so thankful for your strong faith, knowing that you will be reunited with St. Gabbie someday. You always bless my life with your journals.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Tuesday, March 9, 2004 1:12 AM CST
im sure you must get bored of hearing it, and i wish i could find something more orginal to say, but i AM thinking of you,
Love viks from BWC and Post Pals
viks <viks@postpals.co.uk>
- Tuesday, March 9, 2004 0:42 AM CST
Hi Monica:
Your entry was so eloquent. It put into words what my heart has been feeling since I saw the Passion last Sunday night. I cried for Jesus' suffering. I cried for Mary's pain. And I cried for you and every mom that has had to give their child back to God. I cried today when I thought again of Gabbie asking you if 'cancer all gone?' Although in your heart and mind you know she is healed and in Heaven, how agonizingly painful it must have been for you to have to tell her no. I love you Monica and your always in my thoughts.
Mari Beth Ross <jerryandmaribethross@comcast.net>
Hugo, MN - Monday, March 8, 2004 9:35 PM CST
Monica,
I am so sorry for all that Gabbie went through, and all that you and John went through and continue to go through. Today's entry brought tears to my eyes. No child should have to suffer so. You are so right, "blessed are those who have not seen and yet believe." Thinking about you and praying for you.
Love, Jen, Bill, Brady and Saint Zachary Buckentine
Jen Buckentine (www.caringbridge.org/mn/zacharyb) <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Monday, March 8, 2004 9:18 PM CST
Dear Monica,
Such a painful and yet beautiful entry in today's (Monday) journal. I know that as a mom, the scenes with Mary and Jesus were the most heart-breaking. And I have not even experienced a fraction of the pain as either you or Mary.
Love today and always, Kathy
Kathy Welch <abbysmamaa@yahoo.com>
Lexington, Ohio - Monday, March 8, 2004 6:46 PM CST
"The Eternal is the judge of all things without exception; the LORD alone is just. Whom has he made equal to describing his works, and who can probe his mighty deeds?
Who can measure his majestic power, or exhaust the tale of his mercies?" Sirach 18:1-3
Dear Monica,
Praying for you and your continual carrying of the cross of Gabbie's earthly death. You are a faithful sister in Christ and God indeed is using you in every aspect of your life. Thank you for making a difference in my life and thanks to st. Gabbie for making an even bigger impact on my life! She truly is so precious, that picture of her is one of my favorites.
love, Cathy & st. Theresa <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@mailstation.com>
st. paul, mn - Monday, March 8, 2004 10:48 AM CST
Dearest Monica,
Just stopping by as I always do to read and pray for you. The picture of Gabbie with the flowers is beautiful, she is beautiful. Thank you for sharing from your heart so openly on Gabbie's web site-- you are using your deep hurt to reach out to others. You are amazing!!
I love you and Gabbie Both!!!
With my Love in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus , OH - Monday, March 8, 2004 10:30 AM CST
Dear Monica and John,
Just checkin' in to say Hello!
My love, prayers, and support always!
Sara
www.caringbridge.com/mn/danielhammer <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Sunday, March 7, 2004 10:41 PM CST
Dear Monica,
That picture of Gabbie with the flowers is so special. I think it is just beautiful and I know Steven and Gabbie must be enjoying Heaven together. Thanks for sharing the picture.
Suzanne
Gardner, KS USA - Sunday, March 7, 2004 10:22 PM CST
What peace and joy it gave me to read your words, "But God is so wonderful and He will keep leading me!" Isn't that so good to know that God IS wonderful and that He really does LEAD us???? We can 'rest' in that promise.
So little Noah man has that human nature, doesn't he? Be patient and love him and he will hopefully learn some important lessons in life while he's young.
Suzanne
Gardner, KS USA - Friday, March 5, 2004 2:04 PM CST
Hi Monica- Hope things are going ok. Thanks, again for having the group last Saturday. Tim and I are telling Joe's story on the KS95 (94.5 FM) Children's Cancer Research Fund Radiothon on Saturday morning at 8:30 a.m. if you want to listen. I enjoyed reading the book you gave us Sat. It's comforting. Take Care. Cathy
Cathy Rossini <trossini@comcast.net>
IGH, MN - Friday, March 5, 2004 12:32 AM CST
Dearest Monica,
Just stopping by as I always do to read and pray and remember a little girl I never knew, but who has touched my heart so deeply. Thanks for sharing constantly on your site about Jesus and His Love for us. You are so amazing to offer support and love to other families on this cancer journey-- even when you're own hurt is so deep.
I love and appreciate you Monica, Loving Gabbie with you!
Love to you in Christ's Amazing Grace and Love,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Friday, March 5, 2004 7:15 AM CST
Monica,
Just dropped by to catch up tonight and was led to go and read your entry on forgiveness..... I feel like I really need to print it because I'm struggling w/that very issue myself (w/family too, who else??). It is so difficult to forgive the ones who are supposed to love us the most, yet they are so often the ones that hurt us the most too. Thanks for giving me something to ponder. As always, I appreciate your faithfulness, you give so much to so many of us and I pray that we in some small way give you something back....
Blessings!
Christy <calee59@wi.rr.com>
S. Milwaukee, WI - Thursday, March 4, 2004 11:24 PM CST
Noah's resemblence to Gabbie is amazing....
a friend <anywhere@anyone.com>
any city , any state any country - Thursday, March 4, 2004 7:17 PM CST
Hi Monica, It seems odd to me that you are the one apologizing. I will pray for you and for those who have hurt you. Your heart needs healing from the past, but at the same time it needs to be protected from possible future hurts, a fine line to balance. Unfortunately, some people - even family- never get this.
Your writings on forgiveness were right on. But oh what a difficult thing to do when those who have hurt us the most refuse to acknowledge their part and then to be so bold as to pass judgment on your actions and reactions. I have no idea if this is what has happened or is happening to you, and actually that may not even really matter. What matters is that Gabbie is not in your arms tonight and there is no timeline of how long it should take you to fill her space. It will never be filled until you and she are reunited in God's kingdom. Please be gentle on yourself.
Love, Mary
Mary Akagi <b.akagi@worldnet.att.net>
Maple Grove, MN - Thursday, March 4, 2004 5:35 PM CST
Thanks, Monica, for your prayers, love and support.
I know how much you care about our family--and that is so humbling to me with all that you are dealing with.
You have such a caring and compassionate heart.
Thank you, my friend.
Love,Sara
www.caringbridge.com/mn/danielhammer <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Thursday, March 4, 2004 3:14 PM CST
Dear Monica,
Just stopped by to look at Gabbie's face-- she's BEAUTIFUL!!! Hope you're havig a good day, or at least as good as any day ever is without your precious Gabbie here on earth. Wish I had been able to meet her and rock her here on earth. I love you both!!
With My Love in Christ's Amazing Grace and Love,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Thursday, March 4, 2004 12:01 AM CST
Thank You so much for your journal on forgiveness. I thank God for leading you to share that with us. I think a lot of times we tend to forget that Christians are humans too. We as Christians are judged more harshly than others. I have learned not to be so quick to judge others. We never know what others may be going through or what God may be working on in their life.
You have a patience and peace about you that I adore. Thanks so much for sharing your Gift from God, with all of us.
Delana Moore <jdkbmoore@aol.com>
Crawfordville, Fl USA - Wednesday, March 3, 2004 9:30 PM CST
Monica and John,
Just stoppin'by--
Our love and prayer always--
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Wednesday, March 3, 2004 9:23 PM CST
Dearest Monica,
Just thinking of you. I'm so sorry that you've been hurt and I so appreciate your sharing about forgiveness. I wish I had the words to take all of your hurt away, but I don't, so just know that I care and I'm so sorry.
Love to you,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Wednesday, March 3, 2004 9:05 PM CST
Thinking of you all, God bless.
Robin Boger
Lewisville, NC - Wednesday, March 3, 2004 2:02 PM CST
Dear Monica,
Just thinking of you and wanted you to know. I'm so sorry as always that your sweet, precious, most beautiful Gabbie isn't here on earth with you. I know you believe and trust in the promise of Heaven, but that doesn't make you miss Gabbie any less here on earth.
My Love in Christ's Amazing Grace and Love,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Wednesday, March 3, 2004 9:07 AM CST
Dear Monica,
Just here reading, praying and thinking of you and sweet Gabbie. I agree The Passion was so much more than I expected, even after everything I had read. Amazing Love, Amazing Grace.
With Love in Christ's Amazing Grace and Amazing Love,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus , Ohio - Tuesday, March 2, 2004 2:10 PM CST
Hi Monica -
Continuing to think of you often.
Susan Sipe
Big Lake, Mn - Tuesday, March 2, 2004 6:10 AM CST
My Dearest Monica,
Just thinking about you and praying for you today. I'm keeping LaKota in my prayers. Hope you had a good day. So sorry as always for you missing and longing for Gabbie every single day until Heaven. What a day of rejoicing that will be!
Love in Christ's Amazing Grace and Love,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Monday, March 1, 2004 5:03 PM CST
Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers daily.
Kim Rutherford
Knoxville, TN USA - Monday, March 1, 2004 9:18 AM CST
Monica,
I just wanted to let you know that I love the new pictures on Gabbie's site. The one of Gabbie in the stroller at the hospital - is that a little smile on her face? It is a precious picture. And Aubrey and Noah - all your children are so beautiful. I hope you are all feeling well at your house.
My heart, too, is breaking for Lakota and her family. Thank you for sharing her site with others. We think of you and your family often. Thank you so much for the beautiful CD.
Love, Jen, Bill, Brady and Saint Zachary Buckentine
Jen Buckentine (www.caringbridge.org/mn/zacharyb) <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Sunday, February 29, 2004 10:10 PM CST
Hi Monica. Ah so the sleepfilled nights for Noah are over again. I didnt realize how much Lakota's family had been through, its unreal that both children had cancer, let alone that they already lost 2. Life is so unfair...
Chris ~ Gooch's Site ~
- Saturday, February 28, 2004 11:59 PM CST
Hi Monica,
This may not be the thing to put in your guestbook but since you said Noah has gotten a tooth, maybe teething is keeping him up. We had the same problem with Zachary - gave him tylenol before he went to bed and he slept much better.
I do read your site daily and think of you often.
Take care,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt
Zimmerman, MN - Friday, February 27, 2004 8:48 AM CST
Dear Monica,
What an amazing picture of sweet Saint Gabbie. I hope Noah lets you get some sleep and soon!! So sorry as always that Gabbie is not here with you on earth, and I'm not waiting so patiently to be called Home to Jesus for Him to return and get us myself!!
Because of Christ's Grace and His Blood Alone!
Love to you,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Thursday, February 26, 2004 7:14 PM CST
I see your wing, precious Saint Gabbie.
Master Noah Gabriel - your awesome good looks and your charm do not get you out of this one. PLEASE let your mama and daddy and big sister get some sleep!
Love, Kathy
Kathy Welch <abbysmamaa@yahoo.com>
Lexington, Ohio USA - Thursday, February 26, 2004 7:02 PM CST
My Dearest Monica,
I'll be praying with your for LaKota-- I left a short note in their guestbook too. I'm so sorry and my heart hurts with yours as I hear of so many other children stuggling with this horrible beast called cancer-- UGH the consequences of living in a fallen world.
I'm sorry to hear also that you are not feeling well again-- hope you get back to health soon-- I know it's no fun to be sick.
I'm thinking of you and praying too-- so sorry your heart hurts and longs for your precious Gabbie.
With My Love in Christ's Amazing Grace,
Heather (who can't wait to meet sweet beautiful Gabbie in Heaven)
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Wednesday, February 25, 2004 5:54 PM CST
Hello! Thank you for visiting Zach's website. I always enjoy hearing from new visitors just as much as touching base with those friends I've made earlier. I can't believe how many children have lost their lives to this ugly cancer beast. I never really paid attention (of course) until Zach was diagnosed with Wilms Tumor. He fought a very tough battle. We were told right from the beginning that this battle would be hard. Fortunately he felt good for almost the entire deal, just failing the last month or so. Your Gabbie was a doll. It's just so unfair. You ask why our child? Not that you would ever wish ill on anyone else's child, but what did I do to deserve this? We could beat ourselves up over this but it won't bring our babies back. I live in East Grand Forks MN--about 4 1/2 hours north of the cities. I would have loved to meet you and attend the grief group, but it may be a bit long of a road trip!! I love the poem you left on Zach's site. My husband and I talk about death in a very different light. Not that I want to die any sooner than is my time, but for us life or death is a win win situation. Life of course, you enjoy time with your spouse, family, friends, etc, and death, well we get to be with our boy again. There are days that the hurt is so prominent that I'm not sure if I am going to be able to function. But then I remind myself that I have to move forward, I have no choice. Life is such a crazy thing. Again, thank you for visiting Zach's site. I definitely look forward to chatting with you again. Take Care!
Amy Ness http://www.caringbridge.com/nd/zacharyness/index.htm <angelboy19972001@yahoo.com>
East Grand Forks, MN - Wednesday, February 25, 2004 4:09 PM CST
P.S. I fixed Jillian's link! I didn't know it didn't work. I thought I had checked them all. If you find any more broken ones just drop me an email so I can fix them ok? Andy's is closed so I know that one doesn't work; I'm trying to figure out what I want to link to with the ones who have closed their pages and I don't have an answer from God yet, so I'm still praying on it. But if you find another broken one, let me know ok? God bless!
Khalita My Caringbridge Site Duke Peds BMT Aplastic Anemia <khalita@hecaresonline.org>
Lexington, NC - Wednesday, February 25, 2004 2:22 PM CST
Monica, thanks SO much for leaving that prayer request in the guestbook. I am delighted to pray for LaKota. Because I DO follow so many sites I ask the Lord to have people notify me if there's anyone I can't get around to that needs something so your note is actually just another answer to prayers I have prayed. I love it how God uses all of us as an orchestra to accomplishes His purposes in the Earth. I do have LaKota's page saved and will visit there soon to leave them a note and catch up on more details so I can pray specifically. In the meantime I will start praying for them now. Blessings to you for being such a blessing to me. Love to you in Christ.
Khalita My Caringbridge Site Duke Peds BMT Aplastic Anemia <khalita@hecaresonline.org>
Lexington, NC - Wednesday, February 25, 2004 2:15 PM CST
A while back I wrote a thank you note to Khalita for the Mercyme CD. I now realized it was from you too so I wanted to say thank you. I have to tell you my son's favorite song is "I can only Imagine". When I pick him up from daycare he says "put I can only 'a magic' on" and we listen to the song over and over on the way home. We live about two songs away from our church daycare. I don't get sick of it though. It has become kind of a daily affirmation for me. Thank you again.
Laura, Ken, Nathan, & ^^Angel jillian^^ http://caringbridge.org/fl/jillian/
Naples, FL - Wednesday, February 25, 2004 10:40 AM CST
Monica, Thank you so much for your sweet card. It made me smile and made my day. I am thinking of you and praying for you too. Take care and lots of love to you. We'll have to touch base again sometime soon.
Khalita My Caringbridge Site Duke Peds BMT Aplastic Anemia <khalita@hecaresonline.org>
Lexington, NC - Wednesday, February 25, 2004 8:41 AM CST
Dear Monica,
Just thinking of you today and praying and wanted you to know. I love the poem left by Kimberly in the guest book-- I cried too.
So sorry as always for your missing, and longing for Gabbie, but thankful as always for your assurance of Heaven and the Promise of Jesus of seeing Gabbie again.
Thought of you last night in Bible Study when our leader gave this definition of Faith- "Taking God at His Word". It made perfect sense to me!
Love to you in Christ's Amazing Grace and Love,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus , Ohio - Wednesday, February 25, 2004 7:18 AM CST
Monica,
I love the picture on the website. It is beautiful. Thank you for sharing. It is painful to think that is the last family picture taken with precious Gabbie.
I also love the poem that Kimberly left in the guestbook - absolutely beautiful. I may have to share it on Zack's website some day. What a great reminder of how far better off our children are with God and a great reminder of the reality of our eternal future. It is not certain until we have accepted Christ.
I am sad that I won't make it to the grief group again this month. I hope it goes well.
Love, Jen Buckentine
Jen Buckentine (www.caringbridge.org/mn/zacharyb) <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Tuesday, February 24, 2004 9:59 PM CST
Monica- I read your journal entries daily and this is the first time that I'm signing. I've always wanted to, but never really knew what to say. Being a mother myself, I can't even begin to imagine what you are going through. I want to tell you that you are an amazing woman and mother. The pictures you post of your precious Gabbie are so beautiful every one of them brings tears to my eyes. I found this poem and I really thought of you, I hope you enjoy it.
You've witnessed my faith in Jesus
as you've watched me through the years.
And now as I watch while you grieve
there are way too many tears.
Please let there be some tears of Joy
even though I know you grieve,
for now I'm home with my sweet Lord.
It was time for me to leave.
In life we're never quite ready
to say that last "Goodbye",
but if you've ever listened, do it now.
I tell you the truth ~ I did not die!
Oh, I don't need that tired, worn body
for I've changed, like the butterfly.
Bury that worn out caterpillar
and rejoice, for I now can fly!
For Jesus is faithful in His promises
and He promised I would live again
in a mansion He has prepared for me,
more beautiful than you've ever seen.
There is no more sadness or sorrow
in this place where I now reside.
I rejoice in a Heavenly reunion
with other loved ones now close by my side.
Life on earth for me was such a struggle.
Trials and tribulations, I had my share.
It always seemed like an uphill fight
in my struggle to find any peace there.
But now my Joy is made complete
and my Peace, you can't now understand,
as I walk beside the Father
who tenderly holds onto my hand.
My greatest fear while on this earth
and the reason I say these words to you,
is so I can finally rest assured
that one day you'll be coming here, too.
Please don't delay in accepting Christ
who helped me reach my destination.
If you Believe, then I will rest in peace,
awaiting the day of our Grand Celebration!
As long as I just know you're coming,
that your Faith will let you enter Heaven's gate,
then I'll wait here with all the Angels
and rejoice and patiently wait.
Now, as you turn to move on with your life,
step outside and look up into the sky.
Know in your heart that I still love you.
Know in your heart that I did not die!
Copyright 2002
Ferna Lary Mills
P.s
Gabbie- I hope one day I Will Be Dere With You Too!!! You are so very, very special and so deeply love by everyone, even ones you have never met face to face.
Always
Kim
Kimberly Heaton <kimberlyheaton@yahoo.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Tuesday, February 24, 2004 4:27 PM CST
Those solemn, beautiful, big eyes .... the way you were ... I am sorry!
Rebekah Clark <rclark@jrhinc.com>
Prior Lake, MN USA - Tuesday, February 24, 2004 4:06 PM CST
Your girls are soo cute! I can't wait to sleep through the night, too, although you are much closer to it than i am. I wish I had an answer for you about Gabbie's role, I wish I had an answer for all the pain & suffering Gabbie & your family endured on this journey and still enduring. What are our roles in life? It's an endless question with endless answers. Your 3 children look alot alike and they also resemble you a great bit. Wishing you & your family the best outcome in your journey!
Jenn Hartley <ronjenn696@prodigy.net>
Bensalem, PA USA - Tuesday, February 24, 2004 12:46 AM CST
Dearest Monica,
What a beautiful heartbreaking family picture. Gabbie and Aubrey are both such beautiful girls. Just wanted you to know I was hear reading, praying and thinking of you and your precious family.
I know you miss Gabbie, today, everyday, until Heaven-- a truth made possible only through Christ's blood. I'm thankful for the assurance of Heaven that you have Monica, but am well aware that the longing for Gabbie on earth is there with very fiber of your being!
Love to you in Christ's Amazing Grace and Love,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Tuesday, February 24, 2004 10:57 AM CST
Hi Monica,
Intersting--I did not know that Brazil was ahead of America as the biggest party nation. I learn something new every day!
I do want you to know that I completely understood what you meant though--Of course you are not against fun events! It is the carefree (or care LESS) living that is difficult to see--and, sadly, it has become such a big part of our society. When one has been faced with a tremendous personal tragedy, it really does put life into perspective, and our energies are focused much differently..much more wisely IMHO.
Anyway, I truly understand what you meant, and I'm sure everyone else did, too! :o)
I hope Noah is on the way to sleeping through the night!:o)
That is such a nice thought, isn't it!
I was spoiled by Jenny and Daniel becasue they were both very early all night sleepers! In fact, I would get up to make sure they were still breathing.
So, I am not expecting my Baby Mary, who is due in June to be a good sleeper too.. The odds are against it! :o)
Thanks again for sharing your thoughts.
My prayers always continue for your family and my heart is always with you all too.
God Bless!
Sara
www.caringbridge.com/mn/danielhammer <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Tuesday, February 24, 2004 10:40 AM CST
One more thing. Kare 11 had a story about a baby that was born a couple weeks ago that weighed less than a pound and he is actually breathing on his own! On a whim, I put his name in Caringbridge and found his site. If you would like to stay tuned to his journey, the site is www.caringbridge.org/mn/cyrus
My husband looked at me after listening to that news story and said: "This should be a wake-up call to those who think partial birth abortion is acceptable". This is a human life!
Talk to you soon!
Mari Beth Ross <jerryandmaribethross@comcast.net>
Hugo, MN - Monday, February 23, 2004 9:28 AM CST
Hi Monica: I get a Daily Bible Verse emailed to me each morning. Today's was:
"Though he was God, he did not demand and cling to his rights as God . . . He obediently humbled himself."
Philippians 2:5-12 NLT
Jesus is our model for obedience, even when obedience means suffering.
I thought this was so appropriate given that Wednesday is Ash Wednesday and the movie The Passion is opening this week. It also made me think of you and all the other parents of babies and children who have died. There have been so many lately :(
It is important to remember that even though we have to endure suffering, we need to still, like Jesus, be obedient to God.
Love you!
Mari Beth Ross <jerryandmaribethross@comcast.net>
Hugo, MN - Monday, February 23, 2004 9:25 AM CST
Dearest Monica,
Just wanted you to know that I was here, reading and praying for you. I agree and am praying that The Passion of the The Christ is used for an evanligist tool.
Thinking of you today Monica-- Thanks for all you do, sharing the gospel and reaching out to other families walking this road of grief that no one would choose.
Love to you in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Monday, February 23, 2004 6:56 AM CST
PRECIOUS, PRECIOUS picture of Gabbie!!
Monica, thanks so much for all you do!
Bug hugs to you all!
Give the munchkins extra hugs & kisses!
Love,
Angel Sheryl
Sheryl Gunzenhauser <mik181@mchsi.com>
Winnebago, Mn - Saturday, February 21, 2004 12:08 AM CST
Monica -- I have been off-line for a while and was getting "caught up" today reading several journal entries. I read the one where you were wanting to teach Aubrey about doing good deeds unobserved. I have a great book for you! It's called Secretly Do Good Deeds by Melody Carlson. It is a WONDERFUL picture book for small children! My 4 and 6 year old love it and ask to have it read over and over! I read it to my oldest child's Kindergarten class and it was a hit! "But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, so that your giving may be in secret. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you." Matthew 6:3-4 It brings this verse to life in a silly but meaningful way. I think I sometimes need to be explained things like a child!! :)
Tammy Holston <tsholston@bellsouth.net>
Roswell, GA - Friday, February 20, 2004 12:39 AM CST
Dearest Monica,
I will be keeping all of the children and families you metioned in my prayers. You're right-- I too wonder how much longer will we have to wait before God the Father turns to God the Son and says "Go Get Your Bride".
My heart hurts with your as you continue to miss and grieve for precious Gabbie and other children while the rest of the world just goes on partying-- it just doesn't seem right does it?
I think of you daily and pray for you! You are so precious to me-- and a great friend.
Oh this song came to mind as I was reading your journal today-- it's a gospel favorite of my Daddy's "This World is Not My Home, I'm just passing through!" So true and so wonderful for those who know Jesus as Saviour-- Thank You, Thank You for continuing to share Jesus and that truth on Gabbie's site.
Love to you in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Friday, February 20, 2004 9:15 AM CST
Hi Monica. Connor Stokes passed away early this a.m. He was diagnosed with the samed type of ALL as Joe. His site is www.caringbridge.com/mn/connorstokes. Tammy may want to join us, I'll talk to her about it. She may not be ready until March. We'll see. Hope your are doing ok. See you next week.
CathyRossini <trossini@comcast.net>
IGH, MN - Thursday, February 19, 2004 8:18 PM CST
Monica I love the picture of Gabbie as a babie it's so cute, Noah looks so much like her in that picture.
Your so right this country is much into partying I often wonder if people here realize how much starvation and hunger and suffering there is in others countries, one of my biggest dreams is to one day adopt a needie child, one less child going hungry and one more child getting lots of love and kisses. God bless
P.S. My mom is so far doing pretty good hopefully she'll be out of the hospital in about two weeks.
sally torres,
caringbridge.org/ca/nikicamarena
sally torres <sally_torres@lusknet.com>
anaheim, ca - Thursday, February 19, 2004 6:27 PM CST
Hi Monica--I think about you every day. Sorry I haven't written much lately...but know that I love you and keep you in my prayers! You are a special friend to me. :)
Jackson's mom, Michelle
Clear Lake, Wisconsin - Thursday, February 19, 2004 3:27 PM CST
Monica,
It is so ironic that that very question has been very much on my mind esp the past couple days--about resurected bodies. My impression is the same as yours.While I believe their spirit and soul went immediately to Jesus, I also don't *think* they yet have their resurected bodies.(by
trying to read and re read and understand the bible versus pertaining to that.) It still is an uncertain but I have come to the same impression as you-- and that gave me comfort when you had posted on that same subject that has been vividly on my mind! :o)We all help each other try to find the way!
I know Andrea (and son Matthew too), and they ARE such a wonderful family. Andrea truly has a heart of gold and cares so deeply for others.I smiled when I read your words becasue you have been touched by how special she is too!
Thank you again for your journeling. If a day goes by where I am not on the computer do not check in on Gabbie's site, I really feel that something is missing from my day.
Love and Prayers Always,
Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Thursday, February 19, 2004 1:29 PM CST
The picture of Gabbie is so darling. She is so sweet. She still is though and some day you'll see her again. What hope!!!!
Suzanne
Gardner, KS USA - Thursday, February 19, 2004 12:20 AM CST
Thank you Monica. That picture also brings tears to my eyes and a lump to my throat. Gabbie is so beautiful.
Love and peace to you,
Mari Beth Ross <jerryandmaribethross@comcast.net>
- Thursday, February 19, 2004 9:48 AM CST
Dear Monica,
Wanted you to know I came by and was reading and praying. I'm so sorry that you have the flu-- Yuck!! Hope you feel better soon. The picture of Gabbie as a baby is so beautiful!! What a cutie!! So sorry that your heart aches for her each and every day-- until Heaven, what a wonderful reality, but it doesn't make the hurt on earth any less I know.
With My Love in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Thursday, February 19, 2004 9:25 AM CST
Hi Monica;
First, thank you for remembering me in your journal the other day. I'm doing just fine, and have recovered well from my surgery.
Second, I love the new picture of Aubrey and your little man Noah. His little round face reminds me of sweet precious Gabbie. That last picture of Gabbie really tears at my heart.
Would it be possible for you to post some pics of Gabbie of when she was a baby? I don't think I've seen any prior to that one of her and Aubrey, right before she was diagnosed. Miss Aubrey is growing into such a beauty too.
As always, your faithfulness and thoughtfulness toward others leaves me in awe.
I too am reading the Purpose Driven Life (again). I started it last fall, and was doing a chapter a day for about 3 weeks, then fell behind. Now am trying to read it again. I also took a SHAPE class at my church this past fall. It was an excellent exploration of who I am and how I got to this place. I would love to talk to you sometime about what I think my SHAPE is. I have a pretty good idea, I just don't quite know what to do with it yet. I just hope I follow His will, whatever that may be.
I like to think I will be like Abraham was: in Genesis 22: 1-2, it says " Later on God tested Abraham's faith and obedience. "Abraham!" God called."Yes," he replied. "Here I am."
I hope that I'm willing to trust God when he calls on me.
Love you Monica;
Mari Beth Ross <jerryandmaribethross@comcast.net>
Hugo, MN - Wednesday, February 18, 2004 5:56 PM CST
Dearest Monica,
Just came by as I do everyday to read, pray and remember your sweet precious beautiful Gabbie. Thinking of you! My heart is with you as you grieve with the Hope of Heaven, but grieve all the same.
My Love in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Wednesday, February 18, 2004 2:45 PM CST
Monica, yet again I have come to sweet Gabbie's site and gotten what I needed. As you know, wondering about our sweet babies in heaven is something I continue to struggle with here on earth. The new picture of Aubrey and Noah is precious, they are adorable...and of course, Gabbie, heartbreakingly beautiful in her last picture at Children's. God bless.
Robin Boger
Lewisville, NC - Tuesday, February 17, 2004 10:00 PM CST
Dearest Monica,
What a beautiful picture of Aubrey and Noah-- they are both such cutie pies. Thank you so much for sharing their pictures with us.
I too wonder how old children who have gone home to Jesus will be in Heaven, so thank you for sharing your thoughts. So sorry as always for you missing Gabbie every single day. You are such a wonderful Mommy to Gabbie, Aubrey and Noah~ how blessed they are to have a Mommy so concerned about their spirtual well being.
Please know I think about you often and pray for you too. I never knew Gabbie on earth, but she will always hold a special place in my heart so very precious.
With my Love in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@Insight.rr.com>
Columbus , Ohio - Tuesday, February 17, 2004 9:03 PM CST
I haven't signed the guest book in a while. I still check in every day, I just sometimes don't know what to say. I know how I feel knowing that was Gabbie's last picture, I can't begin to imagine what a painful memory that is for you. I hope your wonderful memories of her sustain you as well. As for whether or not they can see us from Heaven, I'm not sure what I believe about that. Maybe if they can't it's a good thing. Take care.
Rhonda Meyer <rschultz@scl.dco.state.mn.us>
- Tuesday, February 17, 2004 11:36 AM CST
Monica,
Oh my goodness--I just cannot believe how much Aubrey and Noah have grown and matured! Wow! They are both soooo sweet!
Noah is quite the handsome little lad and Aubrey is truly a vision of lovliness! Thank you so much for sharing that lovely picture with us! It really put a BIG smile on my face to see their "bright eyes and bushy tails"! :o)
Both of their faces were so expressive! Great photo!
I know how much you appreciate the support from your caring bridge friends--I also hope you know how much you and your family means to all of US too!
Love,
Sara
www.caringbridge.com/mn/danielhammer <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Tuesday, February 17, 2004 10:19 AM CST
What absolutely beautiful children! Miss Aubrey looks so grown up with her new haircut and Noah is such a beautiful mix of Aubrey and Gabbie. I see her peeking through his eyes...you can tell they are siblings.
May God keep you close today.
Love, Mary
Mary Akagi <b.akagi@worldnet.att.net>
Maple Grove, MN - Tuesday, February 17, 2004 5:53 AM CST
Dearest Monica,
I'm so glad you're using your experince~ the most painful one to reach out and share Jesus with others- and to reach out to other grieving Mommies. Thank you! So sorry as always that you are missing Gabbie each day, every day, until Heaven-- what a day of rejoicing that will be!!
Love to yo in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Monday, February 16, 2004 4:32 PM CST
Good morning,
I am a "stranger" who regularly starts my day by coming to your site. Your words remind me daily to be thankful for the gifts in my life.
On a "techy" note...with your new computer. If you go to "tools" in your Outlook express and go down to "options" and click on "security" you can change the setting so that your attachments aren't automatically deleted. Hopes this helps.
Have a great day!
Amy Wenig <awenig@charter.net>
Berlin, WI - Monday, February 16, 2004 8:40 AM CST
Hello, we came to this site by virtue of your having visited our grandsons guestbook.Our beloved grandson Luke Alexander Sweet has taken residence in Heaven. His house has no mortgage he was Christ child from the minute of birth.His soul was pure and remained pure when God showed mercy to him and brought him home. We miss Luke but he is everywhere we turn. Gabbie was a beautiful child and your love for her very evident. We share your grief and we share your joy in her being an angel sister to Luke.
Gene and Gail Sweet,grandparents to Luke <Gailsweet@zoominternet.net>
Ashland, Ohio USA - Sunday, February 15, 2004 5:17 PM CST
Goodbye Children's, hello Jesus...
Love to you this Valentine's Day :)...praying for you all.
Cathy & st. Theresa <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@mailstation.com>
st. paul, mn - Saturday, February 14, 2004 3:32 PM CST
My heart aches for you as I look at this last photo of precious Gabbie. I can't find words right now.....
I hope this is a good weekend for you.
Love, hugs and prayers,
Rhonda Hunley, Connor's Mom
**Connor's page**
<rshunley@comcast.net>
Hendersonville, TN God Bless America! - Saturday, February 14, 2004 12:49 AM CST
Monica,
She was just too sweet and precious for this world, but you were able to prepare her well for the journey. Perhaps your heart will never heal this side of heaven, but one day I think you will be surprised and overjoyed at the lives you & Gabbie have touched here. She was able to accomplish her work here on earth in a much shorter period than the rest of us and now you continue it. That is a legacy worth having. Whenever you are discouraged or feel heartsick, take comfort in knowing that you both are doing the work that the Lord planned for you. I'm just glad He led me here and that I can be a small part of the journey. Know that you are loved, prayed for and cheered on by many of us out here. Thanks for sharing with us, even when it is incredibly painful. Have a wonderful weekend....
Christy <calee59@wi.rr.com>
S. Milwaukee, WI - Saturday, February 14, 2004 12:02 AM CST
Monica-
Thanks for your note in Samuel's guest book. Thanks to Sam, I am finding my way, just as Gabbie showed you yours. I, too, will follow.
Happy Valentine's Day.
Kelly
Samuel's Mama
http://www.caringbridge.org/pa/samuelj
Kelly Johnson
Pittsburgh, PA USA - Saturday, February 14, 2004 8:06 AM CST
Dear Monica,
The last picture of Gabby ever shows her tremendous strength and beauty. She is so precious. I am so sorry that she is not here for you to hold tomorrow and give a big Valentine's Day hug and kiss. You are a wonderful mother, a Godly mother, a giving and loving mother. You are a mother that is not afraid to admit she falls short in the eyes of God, but I am most grateful that you are a mother that recognizes Jesus covered you in all ways necessary to spend eternity with Gabbie. I wish I had more time to leave messages. I do check in from time to time and play catch up with your journal entries. As I have said before, they are ALWAYS a special blessing to me. I could not believe the long, detailed entry my husband, Bob, left you about your question last week. I just showed it to him and asked him if he knew the answer. He thought he knew off the top of his head, but then when he looked it up to give you the answer, it became a bit involved. He likes to dig deep sometimes. Bless him for being the Godly husband and father that he is. Give Aubrey and Noah a special Valentine hug from this stranger that has grown to love them through their mother's words and Gabbie's life. God bless.
Love,
Debbie
St. Louis, MO - Friday, February 13, 2004 9:27 PM CST
Monica,
The picture of Gabbie is so very very precious.
It so much breaks my heart to know this was the last picture of her. What a precious precious precious sweet baby girl..
She just radiates with holiness and pure goodness in every single picture.
Her eyes are the most beautiful eyes in the world.
I love her too. My heart is so heavy for you and John and all her family that loves and MISSES her so.
My heart has so much more to say but my brain can not come up with the words to articulate. Please know how much Gabbie means to me. And how much I truly wish there was a way I could ease your and John's pain.
I pray that Jesus will come again soon.
We sure do need Him.
What a incredible blessing that is to look forward to.
God Bless You both.
Love in Him,
Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN - Friday, February 13, 2004 9:05 PM CST
Dearest Monica,
What a precious last picture of your precious Gabbie-- simply beautiful as she is in every single picture. Her precious sweet spirit just comes through. I'm so sorry you can't hold her in your arms here on earth. And I so wish I had had the chance to hold her and hug here on earth too, but I'm waiting for a time in Heaven when that will be possible.
Thinking of you and praying for you my dear friend!!
Love to you,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@Insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Friday, February 13, 2004 8:02 PM CST
I wrote you an e-mail before I checked Gabbie's site tonight. Gabbie's last picture is as precious as all the rest. Wish she could send you a picture from heaven! Her sweet little chin looks just like Abigail's. We are all just a little closer to heaven today. I thank God for you. Love, Kathy
Kathy Welch <abbysmamaa@yahoo.com>
Lexington, Ohio USA - Friday, February 13, 2004 7:14 PM CST
It is a very small world! We were at OLP last night registering Trevor for Kindergarden. We know so many people that have children that go there and love it.
Just wanted to stop in and say Hi and let you know that not a day goes by without a prayer for your family.
Jennifer Miles www.caringbridge.org/mn/deemartinson <jennifer.miles@thomson.com>
Minneapolis, MN USA - Friday, February 13, 2004 8:29 AM CST
Dear Monica,
Just stopping by to let you know I was here, reading,praying and thinking of you. I'm sure it's true that so many things are so different in your life now without Gabbie here on earth. How my heart aches for you that your arms are longing for Gabbie and that longing won't be fulfilled until Heaven. Praise the Lord that you have confidence and KNOW without a shadow of a doubt that Gabbie is indeed home with Jesus. But as true, and wonderful as that reality is-- it doesn't make you miss Gabbie any less.
Thinking of you today and everyday my dear friend! Hurting with and for you!!
Love to you in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Thursday, February 12, 2004 6:50 AM CST
Hi Monica,
I've only signed your guestbook once before, yet you've been a part of my nightly quiet time since your story first aired on KARE11. I just wanted you to know that you are still, daily, in my thoughts and prayers.
I asked my husband about your question regarding teaching a 5 year old how to do for others without recognition. A very difficult concept, even for many adults! We are both educators and sort of came up with a series of activities that might help her understand what it is all about.
I'm sure you've already talked with her about the concept. Since we are coming up to Easter we thought that might be a way to springboard into an activity that she can relate to. I don't know where you stand on the whole Easter bunny concept, but I think it could be used very effectively here. Start by talking about how the Easter bunny only visits children. Then talk about how older people might enjoy an Easter surprise as well. Ask her if she would like to play the Easter bunny for someone (I'd pick grandparents or someone else you are close to and have access to their house). Emphasize the whole secret aspect. Plan what she is going to leave them. Then, find a way to go to that person's house and set up the surprise. Somehow, have Aubrey overhear the person talk about how wonderful it was to receive such a special surprise & how wonderful it feels to know that someone was thinking of them. Afterward, talk to Aubrey about how good it felt to see the happiness she gave to someone else and how that was more important than them knowing who did it. In fact, it made it even more special. Talk about how happy it made God to watch her blessing others. If she thinks she had a smile on her face, just imagine His!!
After she has had a chance to experience blessing someone else & seeing how it impacts others, make plans to continue doing this. Talk about how blessed she is to have family & friends who love her, a warm & comfortable home, food, & toys. Not all children have these things. Perhaps she would like to make little boxes for kids who aren't as fortunate as she. She could fill them with small toys, crayons, paper, coloring books, books, warm mittens, snacks, etc. Then take them to a women's shelter or something like that. She probably won't see them receive her gifts, but reflecting back on the joy she gave to her first "Easter bunny recipient" will help her visualize the reactions those kids will have. The joy of doing for others is like a secret between her and God. And every time she does it, He smiles even bigger. (Sounds like the beginnings of an intimate & personal relationship, doesn't it?!)
I hope this is sort of what you were looking for. And sorry it is so long!!!
Thanks again for your words. I appreciate you more than you will ever know.
Blessings to you & your family,
Dana
Dana Maeda <bmaeda@unique-software.com>
Inver Grove Heights, MN United States - Thursday, February 12, 2004 0:00 AM CST
Monica everytime I come to your sight I get teary eyed, my heart just aches for you I can see in your writings how much you miss your baby girl. Especially today reading the conversation you had with her. I wish a had a magic wand so I could just make everything fine. Monica I do thank god for the knowledge you have that even though you don't have Gabbie with you now, you know that when god decides to take you home you will see your precoius baby girl Gabbie again. I know I've said it before but it would be such a privilege to watch that reunion take place I'm sure I would cry for hours after that I know it's going to be so emotional. God bless you!!!
love Sally
P.S. sending lots of ((( hugs))) to Noah and Aubrey. : )
sally torres <sally_torres@lusknet.com>
anaheim, ca - Wednesday, February 11, 2004 6:51 PM CST
I remember.
Dianne Goings <dianneg@integraonline.com>
Prior Lake, MN - Wednesday, February 11, 2004 1:00 PM CST
Monica,
I got all teary eyed when I read a part of your and Gabbie's conversation about "will you be dere". Oh, how I can't imagine. (I really apologize for not signing in here in awhile! However, I do check your site probably a few times a day, just in case.)
It was a year ago on 01 31 04 that a couple we are close with, had a daughter killed in a car accident. She would have been a senior this year. Oh how horrible that anniversary was. I can't imagine how you do it, Monica. I didn't know what to tell them or what to say to them, so I sent flowers to their house with my famous line "Always in our thoughts and prayers". The following day there was a dedication to her in church and that was just very difficult for everyone. I know I have already said this, but it was difficult for our family, so I can't imagine what it's like being the parents. We were at a wedding with them last weekend and as the father watched my 2 little girls play and dance on the dance floor, he just looked at me and said, "Oh, how I miss that, Becky." I didn't know what to say! They talk about her, but I just don't know what to say to them. I guess maybe there isn't a perfect thing to say. Maybe it's just important that they know we are there for them?
Sorry, Monica, that this entry turned into something about me, instead of Gabbie. Just never forget that you and your family are absolutely fabulous and that you have touched my life in so many different ways; you have no idea.
Thanks, Monica.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
MN USA - Wednesday, February 11, 2004 10:42 AM CST
Dear Monica,
I've been reading your journal almost daily for over a year now, but have never signed the guestbook. I've always felt that any words of mine would just be inadequate. But today, reading about your beautiful Gabbie's little whisper, I was compelled to sign. Gabbie's journey has so touched my heart...she is a beautiful little girl. I am so sorry for your loss. Please know that your family is in my prayers daily.
Carol G. <carolg@fisherind.com>
Dickinson, ND - Wednesday, February 11, 2004 10:08 AM CST
Dear Monica,
I never knew Gabbie here on earth, but I'm soo glad to have met her Mommy and know her through your journal. I'll remember her always-- she is so beautiful, such a sweet child, who I'm so sorry had to go through so much in her much too short life.
Thinking of you today and praying too.
Love to you in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@inight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Wednesday, February 11, 2004 7:04 AM CST
Hey Ms. Monica,
I wanted you to know that I was thinking of you tonight.
I can just hear that little whisper that was spoken from your sweet Gabbie. My heart is so sad for that conversation, but yet she was brave wasn't she. A brave little soul. I too appreciate so much at Mpls. Children's. Looking back it was like it's own lifetime of experiences. Standing out all alone from the rest of my life. I still come here daily. Your messages always speak to my heart. I will write again soon. Lots of love...God bless you.
Jackson's mom, Michelle
Clear Lake, Wisconsin - Tuesday, February 10, 2004 8:43 PM CST
We will ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS remember Gabbie...she is a precious saint in heaven and a beloved daughter of God. Praying for you today dear sister in Christ...
Love,
Cathy and St. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose>
st. paul, mn - Tuesday, February 10, 2004 6:20 PM CST
Dear Monica,
I hope Aubrey is feeling better soon! Daniel and I were sick all last week--with the flu,vomiting, and sinus and ear infections. It really kicked our butts, so my heart goes out to Aubrey. It is definately no fun feeling yucky and throwing up!
I also wanted to say that it breaks my heart to even think
of you being hard on yourself--and so unfairly I may add.
You and John did an amazing job fighting alongside Gabbie, and I know Gabbie could feel how much you loved her-- and still does!
The picture of your 2 girls is so lovely. Thank you for sharing it!
My prayers are with you always!
God Bless You!
Sara
Feel better soon, Aubrey!
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Monday, February 9, 2004 10:30 PM CST
Monica,
I am sorry to hear that Aubrey is sick. That is so hard for a parent to watch. It is so hard to know what these children go through, who have lost a sibling. Even though Aubrey may not outwardly express grief, there is no doubt that she knows it and that her life will forever be profoundly affected by Gabbie's death. Oh, if we only knew how to help them. More is expected of them than almost any other kid, they are expected to live through a tremendous loss. I hope Aubrey is feeling better real soon. You have had more than your share of sick kids lately. They are so lucky to have you and John as their parents.
I am also sorry for the not-so-good memories about Gabbie's illness - all of the "what if's" and "if I had only..." Don't be too hard on yourself. It was all in God's hands anyway. I pray for your family often.
Love, Jen, Bill, Brady and Saint Zachary Buckentine
Jen Buckentine (www.caringbridge.org/mn/zacharyb) <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Monday, February 9, 2004 9:09 PM CST
Dearest Monica,
How my heart aches for you--I'm so sorry for everything you have been through. You my friend are a wonderful Mommy. One thing I know for sure~ and I know your children know this is that my Mommy and Daddy love me and would do anything for me, and I know that they loved/love Jesus and they love each other and that made for a very secure childhood and it's something I treasure as an adult. So rest assured you're doing a great job as a Mommy-- so many Mommies wouldn't even reconize that their child was getting pushed out by other issues.
I care deeply about you and I'm praying for you. So sorry as always that you long for Gabbie. The picture of her and Aubrey is beautiful and heartbreaking at the same time.
Love to you,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Monday, February 9, 2004 8:38 PM CST
Hello! Hope your Noah & John are feeling better! My Emily tries so desperately to dress & undress Alex, but he's a fighter. He only likes Mommy to dress him, even though he he's a "big Boy Hulk". I'm still searching! I'm going to ask my friend for help to teach Emily and myself, just have to get the courage to ask!! I wish you many sweet dreams & memories of your precious, blond curly headed girl!!
Jenn Hartley <ronjenn696@prodigy.net>
Bensalem, PA USA - Monday, February 9, 2004 1:00 PM CST
I just checking in and glad you had a good weekend inspite of John not feeling well.
I wanted to add a note on Deanna's site but saw no guest book. I was so sorry to read about Alfred.
I hope you are all better and little Noah is over his pink eye. Your class at church sounds very good. It's so good to know what cults believe and to be able to give answers those who are caught up in a cult.
Suzanne
Gardner, KS USA - Monday, February 9, 2004 11:35 AM CST
Hey..My name is Meghan Wilson and I am a cousin of Tyler Wilson, who I miss Dearly! I hope you are getting better and she is a wonderful angel now!! :)
-*Meghan Wilson*-
Meghan Wilson <blink182tot@yahoo.com>
Mahomet, IL USA - Monday, February 9, 2004 10:28 AM CST
Dearest Monica,
Just stopping by this Sunday evening to look at Gabbie's beautiful face. Thinking of you and praying- hope you enjoyed your seminar at Woodale. So sorry as always for your longing for Gabbie.
Love in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Sunday, February 8, 2004 7:57 PM CST
Hi well I started a web page for Alfred it is www.caringbridge.org/mn/alfred Deanna
Deanna Hanson <hansvik12@yahoo.com>
Int'l Falls, Mn Kooch - Saturday, February 7, 2004 3:27 PM CST
Praying for Noah to have a speedy recovery! I just wanted to stop by and let you know that I am still here and still praying. I love to see your writings Monica. What a blessing in God's name you have come to be here in memory of your sweet Gabbie.
May you feel so much love from Heaven above tonight,
Renne' I. Cole-Dowler <rennedowler@aol.com>
Washington, PA - Friday, February 6, 2004 7:43 PM CST
I love that picture of Gabbie. The wild blonde curls! Hope Noah is feeling better soon.
Hugs to all
Jennifer Yseth <j.yseth@mchsi.com>
Brookings, SD - Friday, February 6, 2004 4:36 PM CST
Monica-
Thank you for visiting Samuel's web page, and for your wonderful note. Thank you for sharing your faith and your journey. Gabbie is a beautiful little angel. I hope that she and Samuel play together in their new Forever Home.
Love,
Kelly
mama of Samuel, Rachel and Carly
http://www.caringbridge.org/pa/samuelj
Kelly Johnson <kellyjnsn@comcast.net>
Pittsburgh, PA USA - Friday, February 6, 2004 8:37 AM CST
Dear Monica,
I'm so glad to hear that Noah is getting better-- I hope he's through this middle of the night needing a bottle stage soon!! I know it's tough on Mommy to get up in the night.
Enjoy, Enjoy, Enjoy your seminar at Woodale-- it sounds great and what a great topic to learn more about!
Gabbie's site looks GREAT. I'm impressed with all of your scrolling words etc, I'm not much of a computer expert myself.
So sorry as always that you are missing Gabbie~ I know that pain will never ever go away- not until Heaven!
With My Love in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus , Ohio - Friday, February 6, 2004 7:01 AM CST
Dear Monica,
Debbie showed me your question regarding the tribe of Dan based on Rev. 7:4-8. Actually the tribe of Ephraim is also not directly mentioned. If you want to get into some real issues, please discuss the 144,000 mentioned in this same chapter with a Jehovah's Witness! Then you will be sure to become confused. Actually the 144,000 is a symbolic number and definitely not to be taken literally. Anyway, here is my answer regarding Dan as taken from certain Bible commentaries.
Rev 7:4-8
The first exception is the omission of the tribe of Dan
Why is Dan left out? Some think it is because Dan is thought to be the tribe of the Antichrist (based on Daniel 11:37 and Jeremiah 8:16); but without doubt, Dan was the tribe which introduced idolatry into the nation of Israel (Genesis 49:17; Judges 18:1-31)
Strauss = "William Barclay points out the fact that in Rabbinic symbolism Dan stands for idolatry and that Antichrist is to spring from Dan. This conclusion is based upon Jeremiah 8:16."
But Dan is the first tribe listed in Ezekiel's millennial role call of the tribes (Ezekiel 48); this is a remarkable sign of God's redemption.
The second exception is the way that Ephraim is slighted; he is referred to indirectly in the way that the tribe of Joseph is mentioned, but so is the tribe of Manasseh - meaning that the reference to Joseph has to do with Ephraim .
Why? Perhaps it is because the tribe of Ephraim was also associated with great idolatry (Hosea 4:17)
Hope that helps.
Bob Nagy
Bob Nagy (Debbie's husband)
Manchester, MO USA - Wednesday, February 4, 2004 11:56 PM CST
Dearest Monica,
What a beautiful picture of Gabbie in her swing-- She's simply gorgeous-- what amazing eyes. I too wish so much I had known Gabbie here on earth, and I can't wait to meet her in Heaven.
I'm sure the life you had before Gabbie died is no more- it' all different and always will be- and I'm so sorry.
Please tell Aubrey that I used to like to dress my little brother too-- but be careful they have a tendency to grow up and get bigger than you-- at least mine did.
With Love in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Wednesday, February 4, 2004 6:53 AM CST
Precious! The new picture is breath taking, and to think Gabbie knew her purpose the day she was created ... I too never met Gabbie but I ache to have been able to! Thank you for helping me find my purpose dear Gabbie ... thank you Monica for being you! Your family is an inspiration and I thank you SO much ... I have found God and I am thankful ...
Rebekah Clark <rclark@jrhinc.com>
Prior Lake, MN USA! - Tuesday, February 3, 2004 9:08 PM CST
Monica and John,
Beautiful picture--BEAUTIFUL Gabbie!
What amazing sweetness and gentleness she radiates--in every picture.
What a precious child.
Even though I never met her, I would have done anything for her.
Love,
Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN - Tuesday, February 3, 2004 8:27 PM CST
Monica
Don't feel too bad about falling for the "urban legend", I think most of us have done that a time or two. Jacque was so gracious in the manner she pointed it out.... I sure wish I was more gifted in that area!! As for that other entry, I hate to admit it, but I had my moments when I was a bit sarcastic about Christians and what they believed in. Thank GOD, the Lord always "happened" to put one in my life and that He never gave up on me! I hate to think that had I died before accepting Christ, my mocking words and snide comments would have been just more sins heaped upon the countless others ones I had committed. I know they would be among the many words I would want to take back when standing before God in judgment. Praise the Lord that I don't have to worry about that now! Speaking the truth involves courage and not everyone likes hearing it, you continue to be brave and obedient. I know that I speak for myself and many others when I say you encourage and inspire us to take it up to the next level! WE ARE ALL UNWORTHY (ON OUR OWN)!!!! See what an impact St Gabbie has even to this day!
Christy <calee59@wi.rr.com>
S. Milwaukee, WI - Tuesday, February 3, 2004 6:51 PM CST
Hi Monica. I will never forget that picture that is on the front page. It is the one that, after months of following your site in silence, tears, and awe, encouraged me to reach out to you. It was my connection to you - seeing my old friend Nancy in that picture and realizing that the loss of Gabbie was not a loss to someone who I didn't know, but a loss in a friend's family - a friend I had lost touch with over the years. I too love seeing the love and support surrounding Gabbie at that time. I'm still here, following your painful journey, praying for you, watching you lead others to Christ, and grateful for having found a friend in you. Love to you and John, Aubrey, St. Gabbie, Noah and your respective families.
Mari Beth Ross <maribeth.ross@nrgenergy.com>
Hugo, MN - Tuesday, February 3, 2004 5:11 PM CST
Hi Monica...still checking in on your family and still loving your entries. I think of you and Gabbie and Aubrey so often even though we have never met-Gabbie made such on impact on me also. Take care and continue to do the good work..
Donna (Mom to Ansley) <cochran7871@comcast.net>
Dallas, GA - Tuesday, February 3, 2004 3:38 PM CST
Dearest Monica,
Thanks as always for sharing, and it's so true about discrement, we do need to be careful. I'm glad that you and Miss Aubrey and Noah got to Daycare okay-- do be careful on the roads.
Thinking of you and praying, so sorry you're missing Gabbie every single day. She's simply beautiful and must be a most beautiful Saint in Heaven!!
With my Love in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Tuesday, February 3, 2004 7:02 AM CST
yikes
very afraid <wowiwillnevermeasureup@unworthy.com>
thanksfortheheadsup, mn usa - Monday, February 2, 2004 5:46 PM CST
Thank you very much for the work you do on this website...it has made me cherish my daughter even more knowing how fragile life is. I wanted you to know you need not be concerned about an abnormally high incidence of domestic violence on Super Bowl Sunday (although domestic violence is certainly something to be concerned about overall). It's an urban legend, you can read more about it at http://www.snopes.com/crime/statistics/superbowl.asp. I knew you wouldn't want to be a part of this spread of misinformation. Thank you again for your courage in sharing your family's story.
Jacque
Maple Grove, MN - Monday, February 2, 2004 1:45 PM CST
Monica,
I LOVE your front page picture and other new pictures of Gabbie! She is such a beautiful little child of God...full of wisdom and long-suffering patience. God bless you as you live yet another day without her precious earthly presence. Love,
Cathy & st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@mailstation.com>
st. paul, mn usa - Monday, February 2, 2004 1:04 PM CST
Dear Monica,
I'm glad you were able to have a quiet weekend and get the kids out for a bit. Thank you so much for continuing to share God's love and His Grace on your site.
So sorry as always for your missing and longing for sweet, precious, beautiful Gabbie. How I wish I had known her here on earth. I'm anxious to meet her in Heaven!!
My Love in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Monday, February 2, 2004 6:50 AM CST
Monica,
We may not have met in this life, but one wonderful day, we will!
Christy <calee59@wi.rr.com>
S. Milwaukee, wi - Sunday, February 1, 2004 9:50 PM CST
All my love! I'm so sorry! Your Angel princess is GORGEOUS! This beast is so cruel! The same disease thrives inside our beautiful daughter too. God bless you!
Thomas Team Mommy
www.ChristiThomas.com
Love, Christi Crew Mom, Angela
Tiffin, OH - Sunday, February 1, 2004 2:31 AM CST
Monica
I have signed your guestbook before but don't sign often though I come here daily. I read a quote today that reminded me of you and I thought you might find some comfort in it.
She clings to the hand of G-d to keep from going wild and in His presence comes to know His other hand holds her child.
Anonymous
I hope this new year holds bright moments and comfort for you and your family.
Lisa
Louisville, Ky - Friday, January 30, 2004 12:27 AM CST
Dear Monica,
I love the new picture of Gabbie on the front page, surronded by all those women who loved her! She's just gorgeous!! And how wonderful to think of her enjoying the presence of Jesus all day every day. But I know as wonderful as that reality is, the reality of day to day living here on earth without your precious Gabbie to cuddle and hug is so difficult it can't be put into words. I'm so sorry that your arms ache to hold Gabbie.
I want you to know that I cuddled and held Emily (my Goddaughter) extra tight last night and enjoyed her laughter and smiles as I thought of your precious Gabbie.
Have a good weekend and do stay warm!
Warm Hugs to all of you!
My Love in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Friday, January 30, 2004 6:50 AM CST
Monica,
What a very, very special picture of Gabbie and members of her loving family. Gabbie has such a heavenly, angelic and pure sweetness about her. For someone so young to radiate so much beauty --it just takes my breath away.
How precious of a picture.
Thank you for sharing so much of Gabbie with us.
Even though we know she is in an extraordinary place with the Father,and is experiencing a happiness beyond our wildest imaginiations, I still cannot imagine the emptyness in your heart without her here.
I am so very sorry for that emptyness.
With love and prayers,
Sara Hammer
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Thursday, January 29, 2004 6:43 PM CST
Hi Monica. It was great to meet you last week! Maybe next month we could share pictures, stories, favorites,etc. that would help us get to know each of the kids? Let me know what you think of this idea.
Cathy Rossini <trossini@comcast.net>
IGH, MN - Thursday, January 29, 2004 1:09 PM CST
Dear Monica,
I loved what you shared today-- sincere seekers find Him! How true!! I'm so sorry that Father Kevin is leaving-- I know it's so hard when you have someone in your life you like so much leave-- even when they are following God's call on their lives for selfish reasons we want them here with us. I'll be praying for the transition in the Parish-- it's never easy.
You never fail to touch my heart with all the wonderful things you share on your web site and how you care so deeply for others and for their pain, and their feelings even when yours is so deep.
Please tell your parents to be extra careful in this cold on their ski trip-- I'll be praying for them.
With my Love in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Thursday, January 29, 2004 7:03 AM CST
Dear Monica,
You always touch my heart so deeply. Thank you for your (always) kind words to me. You have often thanked me for coming to Gabbie's site, and added that you so appreciate it as it has to be difficult for me since we are still in this fight with Daniel.
And that is so much like you..always thinking of others and their feelings.
However,I myself, cannot imagine how difficult it must be for YOU to follow the children who are battling this same disease that took Gabbie away from you. I know how much you sincerely care about all these children who are still fighting, but it still has to be so difficult, in ways I cannot even imagine. I don't know if I could be that strong.
Thank you for asking for prayers for Daniel.
And thank you for opening up so much of your life.
(That has got to be difficult at times, esp when judgement is passed on you).
But I know you are helping so many people..in so many ways.
Many people who do not sign the guestbook, for whatever reason, but still quietly visit becasue it gives them comfort.
I come to Gabbie's site daily becasue I honor and respect Gabbie so much, and I truly care about how you and your family are doing. I also come becasue you always inspire me with scripture, and your honestly, sincerity and humbleness. And your beautiful spirit.
Thank YOU, Monica!
My prayers and support always, and extra prayers for your new mother's grief group. God Bless You.
Sara
Sara Hammer <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Wednesday, January 28, 2004 9:12 PM CST
Monica and family-
Just want you to know that I am still checking on you! :)
Try to stay warm. It's very scary to feel how cold it is out there. I just checked the "live cam" of the ice palance and I couldn't believe there were people actually out there!
Always in my thoughts and prayers!
Becky <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
MN USA - Wednesday, January 28, 2004 8:40 PM CST
“O taste and see that the LORD is good: blessed is the man that trusteth in him.” ~ Psalm 34:8
MmmmmmmmHmmmmmmm!! How I have experienced this verse...one of my favorite ones (along with 439 others ;^D)! THANKS
Love--Melody
Melody Bell
Baltimore, MD - Wednesday, January 28, 2004 7:22 PM CST
Hi Monica,
It was great meeting you and hearing about your precious Gabbie. She is an adorable child. Meeting with all you moms last Saturday was much needed for me. Knowing that you are going through much the same as what I am going through with the loss of Mason is comforting. At least I know I am not going crazy. I keep thinking about one statement that was made that day "each morning that we get up is one day closer to being with him/her". I try and remember this in the morning. I have found it has helped me function and cope during my day.
God bless,
Sandy
sandy jergens <sandyjerg@aol.com www.caringbridge.com/mn/masonjergens>
delano, mn usa - Wednesday, January 28, 2004 1:40 PM CST
Dear Monica,
Just here reading and praying for you! I'll be keeping the grieving Mommy in my prayers-- what a horrible thing. Thanks for sharing the gospel everyday on Gabbie's site-- God uses willing vessels and you are certaintly that my friend.
Hope you and Aubrey are enjoying your precious time together learning about Jesus! Give her a big hug from me-- and one for Noah too!!
Love in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Wednesday, January 28, 2004 11:16 AM CST
Hello to you and your family! My 5 year old roams our house after our son sleeps, too. Special Privileges. I'm not a grieving mom, but I grieve for those who lost their precious angels. I look forward to your journal each day, hoping in my heart that I will find my way again... When I was 17 I was born again but quickly lost faith after several deaths of people i knew in just a few short months. Your Gabbie is so cute and truly is an Saint. Here is little girl who needs get well wishes, please pray for her. www.caringbridge.org/page/alexscott Any advice on how to tell my daughter about God? Best wishes to everyone!
Jenn Hartley <ronjenn696@prodigy.net>
Bensalem, pa usa - Wednesday, January 28, 2004 9:29 AM CST
"Where are my babies?" Unfortunately I have had to spend the last few days trying to explain this to Hannah as one of the boys that died in the fire was her classmate. The anguish the mother is feeling is undescribeable and her loss is unimaginable. But to me, any loss of any child is unimaginable. I'm not sure how she will go on and I'm not sure how you manage to, Monica, but I have nothing but respect for you and all you are trying to accomplish. Hannah knows all about Gabbie and she finds that terribly sad and doesn't understand why children get cancer but having a classmate there on Friday and gone on Monday is definitely hard to understand. It also really makes a lot of 7 and 8 year olds having to face a terrible loss of a friend. Please pray for the second graders in Princeton. They are having a hard time.
Hugs,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt <dshszb5@yahoo.com>
Zimmerman, MN - Wednesday, January 28, 2004 8:06 AM CST
Monica,
I love the new picture of Gabbie and the fuzzy hair on her head - very precious. I am glad to hear that the mothers group went well and that there will be another gathering. I could relate to your story about Aubrey's bedtime; we went through the same issues when Zachary was alive. How sweet that she reminded you of your Bible time. What a great habit/desire to enstill in a child. Thank you for spreading the Good News and reminding us all how much we need Jesus Christ. Thinking of you often...
Love, Jen Buckentine
Jen, Bill, Brady and Saint Zachary Buckentine (www.caringbridge.org/mn/zacharyb) <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Tuesday, January 27, 2004 9:02 PM CST
Dearest Monica,
Just wanted you to know I was here-- reading and praying. Your journal enteries are so beautiful and heartfelt-- they never fail to touch me. Thanks for sharing the gospel so openlry and for using the loss of Precious Gabbie to reach out to others. What a great missionary you are.
My Love in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus , Ohio - Tuesday, January 27, 2004 11:06 AM CST
Monica and John,
I'm playing catch up today so thought I'd visit your site and see what's going on in your world. I read your journal entry about the stocking and santa leaving one for Gabbie. We too are going through the stage where our seven year old son, Isaac has moved on, yet we as parents still grieve like it happened yesterday. The other day he said, "we have Maggie this and Maggie that, what's next?" We realized that yes, children do recover quickly and that as a family we still all grieve differently. How do you tell a child that we as parents have sufferred loss in a different way and that we still need to grieve in our own way? We'll continue on. We have been told that children who suffer through loss of a loved one early in life won't show until later in childhood and early adulthood how it really affected them. So the work in healing is on going. Will continue to check in on the great work you are doing. May God continue to grant you his healing power. Thank you again for plugging Maggie's web site (www.maggiebringshope.com). You have quite a following as the hits to Maggie's site just keeps growing since your mention of it in your journal. It's comforting for me as a bereaved parent to know that our angels will never be forgotten by a busy world and that their lives did have a purpose here on earth. I'm waiting patiently for Heaven!
Doug Mehlhaff <info@maggiebringshope.com>
Rapid City, SD - Tuesday, January 27, 2004 10:11 AM CST
Thank you for teaching me more about God and his message.
Jennifer Miles www.caringbridge.org/mn/deemartinson <jennifer.miles@thomson.com>
Minneapolis, MN USA - Tuesday, January 27, 2004 9:05 AM CST
Though it has been awhile since I have written, I have been keeping up with your journaling every day and have been in prayer for you and your family and especially for your ministry. The story about Sarah has haunted me...the Down Syndrome, you know. I am glad you felt her radiating love...it is said that the extra chromosome is the chromosome of love and caring ;^D...but it is still difficult in the raising, as with any child. Our hearts need to be open to soooo many types of trials that people encounter while on this earth...and their joys, too :-D. From my heart, thanks for acknowledging another special child! Thanks for encouraging her parents. The best to you this day...continue to show the face of Jesus to others!
Much love--Melody
Melody Bell
Baltimore, MD - Tuesday, January 27, 2004 7:02 AM CST
Dearest Monica,
So glad to hear that your grief support group went well. What a blessing to these Moms I'm sure, a safe place to talk about their beloved children.
Glad you got to share your faith story again-- I'm sure it touched some hearts, and Church at Chammps what a great idea. :) I fully believe in reaching people right where they are and that sounds like an incredible opportunity to do just that.
I'll be praying for sweet Sarah-- I'm glad you were able to get a special hug from her-- wish I was able to give you one myself.
Take Care of yourself Monica and stay warm!!
I think of you so often and pray for you too! Please know that I think Gabbie is beyond beautiful and I can't wait to meet her in Heaven.
With My Love in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Monday, January 26, 2004 5:36 PM CST
I'm happy to hear your meeting turned out good. Who better for support than others that know how you feel and how much these precious babies are missed. I'll be sending prayers for Sarah, she sounds like such a sweet child.
God bless
Sally Torres <sally_torres@lusknet.com>
anaheim, ca - Monday, January 26, 2004 10:38 AM CST
Dear Monica,
I just can't say it enough..what a beautiful job you do with Gabbie's site. Truly.
I honestly feel the spirit of the Lord when I read your words. It is beautiful. You are so very special.
And so is our precious, precious Gabrielle.
God's love to you, John, Aubrey and Noah,
( Gabbie too--but I know Gabbie is already basking in His beautiful love--isn't she LUCKY!)
Love and prayers and support always,
Your friend,
Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN - Sunday, January 25, 2004 8:04 PM CST
Dearest Monica,
I've been thinking of you all day long, praying too!! I hope that your group meeting went "well"--is that the right word to use for a grief support group? Hope that you were able to connect well with other greiving Moms and give each other much needed support that can truly only come from those who have been there and done that.
You are prayed for, and loved by me Monica. Have a wonderful day of worshiping our Lord tomorrow!!
Love in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Saturday, January 24, 2004 4:10 PM CST
Prayers to you this a.m.! I'm in (cloudy) CA, but my heart is with you other moms :). God bless you all and I'm anxious to hear how it went...love,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@mailstation.com>
st. paul, mn - Saturday, January 24, 2004 11:25 AM CST
I haven't forgotten you. You are in my thoughts and prayers constantly. It's just been a long week. I will get back to you by email this weekend or Monday. I have not even read it yet but did see it. Your entries once again touched my heart and made me nod. I say yes and amen. I will be praying for your meeting tomorrow. Blessings and love to you in Christ.
Khalita My Caringbridge Site Duke Peds BMT Aplastic Anemia <khalita@hecaresonline.org>
Lexington, NC - Friday, January 23, 2004 4:55 PM CST
Hi Monica, My prayers and thoughts will be with all of you in the morning. I know the room be filled with lots of love from above.
Mary Akagi <b.akagi@worldnet.att.net>
Maple Grove, MN - Friday, January 23, 2004 4:16 PM CST
Dear Monica,
What a great response to those who say we only WANT to believe in Jesus. In sharing your story and what Jesus has done for you you are truly furthering the gospel. Our pastor always says no one can really argue with your story and what Christ has done personally for you. So I thought your repsonses were just awesome and so very true. Praying for your group tommorrow.
Love in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus , Ohio - Friday, January 23, 2004 7:02 AM CST
Monica,
Am playing catch up again this week..... in a strange way your remark about crying while you drive made me smile. That seems to be when I have my most intense conversations with God and my most heartfelt tears. Maybe its because it's the one place we as mothers can REALLY go to be alone. We all know the bathroom isn't one!!! I have often wondered what other people thought of me if they happened to glance over while I was having one of my boo hoo sessions??? Glad to know I'm in such good company! I will be praying for your mother's group meeting on Saturday. I pray that through the tears you will all be able to encourage and be blessed by one another. Try to stay warm!!!
BRRRRRRRR (I miss Florida!!)
Christy <calee59@wi.rr.com>
S. Milwaukee, wi - Thursday, January 22, 2004 6:59 PM CST
Dearest Monica,
I just wanted you to know that I'm here and I'm reading and praying for you. I'll be praying for your mother's group on Saturday. What a gift you've given others in setting this up and planning for it- helping others who are walking through a journey no one would choose.
Thanks for sharing the gospel on your site-- what an awesome missionary you are!! So sorry as always that you are missing Gabbie. Thankful for your assurance of seeing her again in Heaven and being with her for all enterity.
My Love to you in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Thursday, January 22, 2004 10:59 AM CST
hi monica
i come in to see how you were doing and you helped me today !! god loves me !! who better to look after mitch until i get there some day.i never thought of that before. all i ever thought was who could ever look after mitch better than me ? who could love mitch more than i do? but you woke me up to that today,,, thank you
abbie
«♥Angel Mitchell♥» <afraser1@tru.eastlink.ca>
tru, ns can - Wednesday, January 21, 2004 8:35 PM CST
Hi Monica. I plan on coming on Sat. Will Lisa post directions on her website or should I get them from you? Thanks. Cathy
Cathy Rossini <trossini@comcast.net>
IGH, MN - Wednesday, January 21, 2004 5:40 PM CST
Dear Monica,
As you probably already know, I, too, cry a lot while driving. I guess it's probably the only time I'm alone and have time to think. Then when I think, the tears start because I miss Steve so much.
I plan to attend the meeting on Saturday and will be calling you for directions. . . .
Love, Janine
Nielsen <ekimnielsen@msn.com>
Minneapolis, MN USA - Wednesday, January 21, 2004 4:14 PM CST
Monica, I have visited the Nicoll brothers site before as they transplanted at Duke at the same time as my friend's precious Reese. Sometimes I literally lose my breath when I think of the trials that some endure. Not only grieving mothers cry while driving, I do as well as many times that is the only time I have for myself...and I wonder, why not me? I have been blessed with two healthy children but I still ache for those who are missing their own. Thank you for continuing to share yourself so freely and making me think. I can't tell you how many times I have come to your sweet Gabbie's site and something has hit so close to home. I am very thankful that I have met you via the internet highway as most likely we would not have otherwise; however, I do wish that it would have been under different circumstances. For anyone wishing to learn more about MPS disorders, the national website has a lot of good information (www.mpssociety.org). The Nicoll brothers had MPS III or San Fillipo. Reese had MPS I or Hurler Syndrome. God bless!
Robin Boger
Lewisville, NC - Tuesday, January 20, 2004 7:40 PM CST
Monica~ Thank you for always speaking Jackson's name. :)
You are truly a wonderful friend, and I am so thankful for you. The face of your sweet Gabbie is always in my mind and in my heart.
With love,
Your friend, Michelle
Clear Lake, Wisconsin - Tuesday, January 20, 2004 5:11 PM CST
Thank you for the beautiful story about Aubrey...in her innocence she is so precious! You're so right, Gabbie wouldn't want to come back...some day may we all join her and know of those same heavenly joys. I'll be praying for you guys on Saturday and I'll probably be crying too...I'm so disappointed to be missing the morning. God bless,
Cathy and st. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@mailstation.com>
st.paul, mn - Tuesday, January 20, 2004 1:17 PM CST
I hope you make some new friends and find some support and comfort in each other (oh yes by all means, dont go posting addresses- I bet you could go as far as getting a local community center to donate space for your meetings if need be...)
Chris ~ Gooch's Site ~ <Chrisrusso_@hotmail.com>
- Tuesday, January 20, 2004 7:55 AM CST
What a wonderful way to close Aubrey's day! I pray that your mothers' group will be a blessing to all who attend. It will be a time for tears, but hopefully also for recalling sweet memories of children gone too soon to Jesus. But as you SO rightly pointed out - Gabbie would not want to come back. Let me know how the first meeting goes - I will be praying for you and the rest of the moms.
Love, Kathy
Kathy Welch <abbysmamaa@yahoo.com>
Lexington, Ohio USA - Monday, January 19, 2004 9:18 PM CST
Monica-
I want to wish you well with your new support group. I am anxious to hear how it goes for you all, I mentioned this to Julie, just to let her know that there are people out there who KNOW what she is going through, I know right now is probably too early for her, but I told her when and if she needs the support it is there. I Pray that you all find comfort in each other. Have a good week!
Deb <DV-MEYER@MSN.COM>
- Monday, January 19, 2004 7:52 PM CST
Dear Monica,
What a great gift to give your precious Aubrey--my Mommy used to listen to Christian records with me at night-- I'm sure Aubrey doesn't even know what a record is. :) I loved that precious time with her all by ourselves and still treasure those memories today.
I'll be praying for your grief support group, which I'm sure will be a great outlet for grieving Mommies to share with others who can understand as no one else quite can.
Please know that I think of you so often and pray for you.
With My Love in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@Insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Monday, January 19, 2004 7:08 PM CST
Just wanted to say Hi ( Happy 8th Birthday Alfred) or what would have been. Thank you for all you kind words. Deanna
Deanna Hanson <hansvik12@yahoo.com>
Int'l Falls , Mn Kooch - Monday, January 19, 2004 12:05 AM CST
Dearest Monica, I came to read your journal and was stopped dead in my tracks by Gabbie's suffering little soul. This is so difficult to accept. Just know that I love her. I have never met her or you, but I really do love her........so so much. I think about your family almost every day and am thankful for every thing I have. I wish I had the spiritual clarity that you do, but unfortunately, I am still searching. This is one of the reasons I come here to Gabbie's site. Also, because she is the most perfect being I have ever seen.
Kristy and Mia <kristy@wt.net>
Houston, Tx - Sunday, January 18, 2004 5:35 PM CST
I am sitting here with tears flowing as I read and listened to Gabbie's story. My heart aches along with yours for your loss. You see, I too know what it is to give up a child. I have had three of my precious children go to be with the Lord. It is so heartbreaking. I want you to know that my thoughts are with you all. Our story is below if some day you are able to read it, if not, I understand. HUGS. Jo
www.geocities.com/heartland/stream/2668/index.html
Jo <jopo@peoplepc.com>
Oh - Sunday, January 18, 2004 3:31 PM CST
Monica I Emailed you back. Thanks again for emailing me. Deanna Hanson
Deanna Hanson <hansvik12@yahoo.com>
Int'l Falls, Mn Kooch - Sunday, January 18, 2004 1:51 PM CST
Dear Monica,
Just wanted you to know I'm here reading and praying for you. Amen to what you wrote in your journal today-- it's true-- No mere Mortal could have effected humanity the way Christ did--and still does!
Thanks for being a wondeful missionary for Christ and using your deep hurt to touch others lives for Christ.
Hope that you and John have a wonderful time at the wedding, Precious Gabbie touched and continues to touch so many lives. I can't wait to hug her in Heaven.
Love in Christ to you,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@Insight.rr.com>
Columbus , Ohio - Thursday, January 15, 2004 6:10 PM CST
Dear Monica, I have just finished printing out your entire journal! I plan to use it as part of my devotions each day. You have so much to say about celebrating Jesus while struggling, being angry, heartbroken etc. Thank you for being His instrument in my life.
Stephanie and RachelJoy <sstrom@quik.com>
- Thursday, January 15, 2004 5:11 PM CST
Monica thank you for mentioning my mom on your website that was very kind of you. Also just thought I would let you know she is in isolatoin right now they want to rule out TB because of the phnemonia she has, they had us wearing mask yesterday when we went to see her, what is so neat though is the family is keeping strong and staying positive we were joking about how we look like ducks in them. Today we should have results back on what type of Leukemia she has, I'll let you know today Monica as soon as we hear from the doctor.
As always I'll keep you in my prayers along with the rest of your familiy, I know you must miss Gabrielle so much.
God bless you sally
Sally Torres <sally_torres@lusknet.com >
Anaheim, ca - Thursday, January 15, 2004 10:33 AM CST
Monica-
I was thinking of you tonight, as I do daily.
Your note on grief struck me. I believe that
statement to be more true then perhaps even I
care to realize. No words to explain.
I am hoping to make it to the meeting. I would
love to see you again, and meet with other moms.
I will let you know. Talk to you soon.
Love,
Michelle
Clear Lake, WI - Wednesday, January 14, 2004 8:24 PM CST
I am so sorry about your loss. You probly don't rember me but I meet you at the hospital with my son Alfred. I lost my son April 4th 2003. We had him at home with us. It is hard becouse he would be having his 8th birthday on Jan 19.It is hard I live so fare away from every one that I ment and no one up here has gone through this so when ever I can I talk to people on the computer. Do things ever get better?
Deanna Hanson <hansvik12@yahoo.com>
Int'l Falls, Mn Kooch - Wednesday, January 14, 2004 7:38 PM CST
Monica,
It has been a long, dry spell away from the computer and checking up on my Caringbridge families. It always takes my breath away when I see a picture like that of Gabbie when I log on..... she looks so tiny and defenseless. It gives me the smallest taste of what you all had to endure during her illness. I just don't know how you did it and I can understand why her death haunts you so much still today. Thank the Lord for the caring souls He has put in your path recently to give you that hug or encouragement when you needed it. Although you are correct when you say the world is a dark place and growing darker daily, there are still those bright lights that shine. Thanks for persevering and keeping the faith, even when it's not easy.
Christy <calee59@wi.rr.com>
South Milwaukee, wi - Wednesday, January 14, 2004 7:19 PM CST
Despite her bruised and suffering little body, Gabbie looks absolutely beautiful...her little soul shines through to show the child of God that she is. Thank you for posting her picture! God bless you and your trip to NYC :). Love,
Cathy & Theresa Rose, heavenly resident <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@mailstation.com>
st. paul, mn usa - Wednesday, January 14, 2004 9:00 AM CST
Dear Monica,
Thinking of you, praying for you. So sorry for your deep loss and I'm thankful for strangers that God sent into your life on Friday. Wish I could give you a hug myself!
With Love in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@Insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Tuesday, January 13, 2004 10:41 AM CST
THINKING OF YOU ALWAYS~
Lots of Love & Hugs ....
Chemo Angel Sheryl
Sheryl Gunzenhauser <mik181@mchsi.com>
Winnebago, MN - Tuesday, January 13, 2004 9:06 AM CST
Monica,
Your work with HE CARES is completely in God's hands. Please do not be discouraged. The response from a particular person did not surprise me, but only prompted me to pray for her more. Do not forget the lives He has changed throughout time. I know I need not mention the biblical ones, because you more than likely know more of them from the Bible than I do. Continue to do HIS work. Lives WILL be changed, people WILL be saved, and parents WILL be reunited with their children because of these efforts you are doing through HIM, and for HIM. I am praying for you to feel His peace in this endeavor. Blessings to you as always.
In His love and friendship,
Debbie Nagy <nagyhome@earthlink.net>
St. Louis, MO - Tuesday, January 13, 2004 0:09 AM CST
Dear Monica,
I have not written in a while due to computer problems and then when I did get back up a week or so ago, everything just got hectic around here. I have been having to work a lot more hrs. lately than I want to work. Nonetheless, I still manage to check Gabbie's site a few times a week, and always go back to read your journals and what I have missed. Bless you and Khalita for your work with HE CARES. I am trying to figure out my life and time for my own family and a balance with my time and Caringbridge. I am still praying about it, and I really hope that the Lord answers soon, but thus far, I do not feel He has let me know as to what I should do. I have been in touch with Khalita. The picture of Gabbie at the top of the website goes painfully into the very depth of my soul. Your precious Gabbie, God's angelic saint, brings tears to my eyes, even though I know she is "dere". My love to you and your family as always.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Monday, January 12, 2004 11:31 PM CST
Monica,
I check this page often though I have only signed the guestbook a few times. It is nice for me as a Christian fairly new to the Walk to see your views. You have a wonderful way of explaining the Gospel and I Thank You for doing so. God has done a lot for me in the past year and a half and I find myself wanting to share that with eveyone. It hurts when your closes friends give you the hand and don't want to hear it. Especially when they are struggling and you know the place they can find peace. But it says in the Bible that even family will become enemies. My mentor and friend that has helped me so far in my walk I could never repay told me something the other day that made me do a double take. He said maybe this friend wasn't sent into your life for you to teach the Gospel to at this time. Maybe you were sent to her life so she could teach you something. I had never looked at it that way. I will not allow those that persecute me to destroy my joy. If being treated like this for the rest of my life allows me to spend eternal life with the Father, I will endure.
I just wanted to say Thanks for sharing your precious daughter with so many,
In Christ's Love,
Delana Moore <jdkbmoore@aol.com>
Crawfordville, Fl USA - Monday, January 12, 2004 9:46 PM CST
Monica,
God's grace comes in the most unusual ways...a stranger's question, a hug, a man singing incredibly off-key in church...and a grieving mama in a freezing cold state far away.
Love,
Natalie Martin-Rak (www.caringbridge.com/fl/lina) <vladanat@comcast.net>
Jacksonville, fl - Monday, January 12, 2004 9:08 PM CST
Amen and Amen, Khalita. Precious Saint Gabrielle I am so sorry for the pain that you endured in your brief time with us on this earth. I am so very sorry that your mama and daddy are still enduring it. They are very special people.
Love, Kathy
Kathy Welch <abbysmamaa@yahoo.com>
Lexington, Ohio USA - Monday, January 12, 2004 6:39 PM CST
Monica, do NOT worry. So, for the record "those things are in God's hands and you have no control". Yes, God is in COMPLETE control and yes, I did FULLY anticipate this. I apologize for not mentioning it in one of our conversations--I really meant to because I knew it would be an issue. That is ALWAYS the case when sharing the gospel. However, I do not want you to worry or grieve because this has been extensively covered in prayer and that will continue. The Word of God NEVER comes back void--written or spoken. It WILL do what the Lord means for it to do. I PROMISE you that. As Executive Director, I am personally mailing/emailing each family that receives a gift as follow-up and will discuss this with you as we get further along. For now, I leave you with this...
"As the rain and the snow come down from heaven, and do not return to it without watering the earth and making it bud and flourish, so that it yields see for the sower and bread for the eater, so is my word that goes out from my mouth: It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it."
Khalita My Caringbridge Site Duke Peds BMT Aplastic Anemia <khalita@hecaresonline.org>
Lexington, NC - Monday, January 12, 2004 5:27 PM CST
This picture has made me love her even more. How I long to hold her, and kiss her, and smell her and thank her. What a beautiful child. Thank you for sharing her with us.
Mary Akagi <b.akagi@worldnet.att.net>
Maple Grove, MN - Monday, January 12, 2004 4:12 PM CST
Hi Monica,
Just stopping by to give you my love, support and a "hug."
(through the computer! :o)
Even though I have never lost a child,
I have to say that everything you write (ie notes on grief)
always make pefect sense to me. Nothing you have written has ever surprised me or was difficult to understand..at all.
The picture of Gabbie on the home page, (although I'm glad you posted it) truly breaks my heart. It is so painful to see the inncent ones suffer.
I look back at Daniel's very scary photos during treatment and it is horrible, but I can't even *fathom* how much more PAINFUL it is for you to look at her "during treatment photos" now that she is with Our Heavenly Father.
Thank you again for sharing your beautiful Gabrielle with us.
She is such a beautiful soul.
God Bless You!
Sara
www.caringbridge.com/mn/danielhammer <hammertime311!@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Monday, January 12, 2004 4:06 PM CST
I'm glad you put the picture on that you did. Although it is great to see them all happy, healthy looking and smiling, that is not reality for a kid with cancer. The picture you put on this site is the reality that NONE OF US should ever forget. I know Gabbie is in Heaven and I know she is no longer in pain, that does give some comfort. However...it still leaves me with the question of why? Why should such innocent children go through life knowing little more than what it is like to be sick and have chemo treatments and all that goes with them. Although I check Gabbies site everyday, I want to thank you for reminding everyone what she endured in her very short life. I am so sorry.
Rhonda Meyer <rschultz@scl.doc.state.mn.us>
- Monday, January 12, 2004 1:18 PM CST
Monica I'm glad you enjoyed your weekend. I check in on you everyday and just hadn't written in a while, the picture of Gabbie is heartbreaking I can't even imagine how hard is was to see her like that, I'm glad that the next time you see her she'll be free of cancer and will live with you in eternity. God bless you
sally <sally_torres@lusknet.com>
anaheim, - Monday, January 12, 2004 11:16 AM CST
So sorry about your loss. I lost my son, Joe, to leukemia this fall. I am interested in joining the grief group. Thanks.
Cathy Rossini <trossini@comcast.net>
IGH, MN - Monday, January 12, 2004 9:33 AM CST
Thinking of you today, Monica...
Rhonda, Hunley
**Connor's page**
<rshunley@comcast.net>
Hendersonville, TN USA - Monday, January 12, 2004 8:35 AM CST
Hi Monica, just wanted to let you know that I'm thinking of you & continue to lift us ALL in prayer. Every day is a struggle, isn't it? I completely know what you mean about people avoiding us... I remember the first time a 'friend' dodged me in a store. (kind of makes you understand how the lepers felt, doesn't it?!?!?!) I always remember how you count each day that Gabbie's been gone, much as we all do. Tomorrow (tues), "Andy's been gone 365 days"...not a day I look forward to. God bless you, my friend.
jan livingstone (Andy's Mom forever)
- Monday, January 12, 2004 3:50 AM CST
Monica, it sounds like you had a nice visit. I'm glad that you have friends who you are able to relate too. Even though each parent's personal experience is different and unique after the loss of a child, I know that they understand what a "fiery" struggle this is. And yes, it is uncomfortable when someone loses their child and you don't know what to say but our uncomfortable feelings are nothing to the amount of pain the parents are going through. The people who actually acknowledged my losses will always have a special place in my heart. I so admire that you have been able to move past your co-worker's lack of acknowledgement, unfortunately, that is something that I still struggle with and one of my old friendships has not recovered. The new picture of Gabbie is heartbreaking but she is still so beautiful. As hard as it is for us to see her like that, I still can't imagine your pain in watching her live through it. Thinking of you all. God bless.
Robin Boger
Lewisville, NC - Sunday, January 11, 2004 9:42 PM CST
First time that I have been to your web site, I just read your whole journal and want you to know that you are in our prayer's and thought's God be with you.
Love LaKota and her mom,Debbie
~*~ Lakota's Page ~*~
http://www.carinbridge.org/mn/laplafcan <sdl@astound.net>
St. Cloud, mn - Saturday, January 10, 2004 8:44 PM CST
Hi Monica,
You have a safe trip to St Cloud. Please know that my heart is with your family and with Zachary's family.
I just got caught up with your journeling as we have been out of town as you know, and then had some computer problems. Good for you being on the marrow registry. What a beautiful gift we can give others,and what an ultimate honor to do so.
Hugs to Aubrey and Noah
My Love and Prayers Always,
Sara
www.caringbridge.com/mn/danielhammer <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN - Saturday, January 10, 2004 9:33 AM CST
Hello Monica-
Just coming by to check on you all and I was guest # 242,242 !!!!! You guys are almost to the 250,000 mark, WOW !!!! I know you wish there never had to be a website for your sweet Gabbie, but you have touched so many lives through this ordeal.
God Bless-
Alison
mom to Angel Alexandria
www.caringbridge.com/page/alexandriasangels
Alison Haddock <alisonhaddock@charter.net>
Saint Louis, MO - Friday, January 9, 2004 9:26 PM CST
Monica, I can't get over how brave you are. When I think of your daily struggle to deal with Gabbie's absence, I am reminded of Mary at the foot of Jesus's cross. As she watched her son in agony, she wept and wondered why her beloved child had to endure such agony. However, today, we know that her tremendous loss continues to have profound meaning for all of us who believe. I'm not sure how much she understood about this supreme sacrifice by the time her own life came to an end, but I am convinced that she is in heaven singing the Lord's praises and holding you, and all grieving mothers, close to her own heart.
Mary
, MN - Friday, January 9, 2004 10:32 AM CST
Dear Monica,
Reading the first few lines of your journal tonight gives my heart such hope for the one that you are graciously praying with me to hear the knock of our Savior upon his life. God in His mercy has allowed Aaron another good check-up at the James Cancer Hospital. Have a safe and blessed trip to visit with Saint Zachary's family.
Love, Kathy
Kathy Welch <abbysmamaa@yahoo.com>
Lexington, Ohio USA - Thursday, January 8, 2004 7:15 PM CST
Dearest Monica,
Thinking of you today and praying too. I know that you must miss Gabbie terribly-- I have no children myself so I have no idea what you must be feeling or how hurt you must be when others didn't (don't) respect your sweet Gabbie and her death. Just know that I do care and I'm so sorry for your loss. Enjoy your visit with another greiving Momma who can understand in ways no one else possibly could. Please have Jen give you a HUGE hug from me okay??
Love to you in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Thursday, January 8, 2004 6:52 PM CST
Hi Monica,
I am trying to get in touch with my friend in Kansas regarding her "Angel Voice" cd. I'm sure you were overwhelmed with cards and mementos after and during Gabbie's illness. I am touched that you would remember what you received from me..but then, that is the kind of person you are. I will keep in touch with you once I get in contact with my Kansas friend. Also, my sister-in-law is the organ transplant coordinator for North America and works tirelessly to get the positive word out regarding organ donation. On her behalf, thank you so much for registering. First you continue to share your sweet Gabbie with all of us and now you are sharing yourself by registering to possibly save another life. I can't tell you how much I honor you and am proud to know you.
Your friend,
Mary
P.S. Thank you for your card and picture of your three beautiful children. They are on my refrigerator next to some very special pre-school artwork.
Mary Akagi <b.akagi@worldnet.att.net>
Maple Grove, MN USA - Thursday, January 8, 2004 4:07 PM CST
Monica,
Thanks for the call the other night...you are a true consoler. I'm looking forward to seeing you soon! God bless you and your days without the physical presence of dear Gabbie...
Cathy <weloveteesa@mailstation.com; caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose>
st. paul, mn - Thursday, January 8, 2004 12:41 AM CST
Dearest Monica,
I think of you daily and check your webpage daily. I have not had lots of time to sign the guestbook or send emails because my Zachary has been so sick as of late. I am going to sign up for the bone marrow registry as I would encourage people to have their organs donated. After loosing a brother to kidney failure, you know how important it is to have people donate.
You have a lot of courage to keep up with this website and the journey you are on.
Take care!
Hugs,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt
Zimmerman, MN - Thursday, January 8, 2004 9:59 AM CST
Monica,
I want to thank you for sharing Maggie's web page (www.maggiebringshope.com) with your many, many readers and for all the prayers. As you have also experienced, prayer is the vital tool necessary for grieving families as we have felt every prayer and it continues to sustain us through this long, hard journey. This Christmas was so tough and I'm relieved to have it over and like yourself, we survived. The spirit of Christmas was alive for us as we went to church, but the gifts, tree, and everything else was just going through the emotions for our 7 year old son. When it came time to take down our tree, I kept saying to myself, why am I taking this tree down, we haven't even had Christmas yet? When will this journey get easier? We know God has a plan for us and we continue to trust Him, but why does it take the death of our children to spring us to action? May God continue to bless you and your ministry as He has also blessed us. Thank you for sharing Gabbie with all the world to see, she deserves the best.
A friend, Doug
Doug Mehlhaff <info@maggiebringshope.com>
Rapid City, SD - Wednesday, January 7, 2004 11:51 PM CST
Monica and family-
I know I say this in almost every entry, but Monica, you just amaze me with your strength. Even though you are grieving, you are reaching out to people and spreading His word so more people can know Him. I enjoy coming to your site to see what you have to say and the things you are quoting. I think it's fabulous about the group you are starting. I wish there would be something like that in greater MN. I know a few families who could use more support from people that have been through similar situations. As I was watching KARE 11 tonight, they had a little story about the Mayer family who buried their 3 daughters today. They showed a bit of the funeral when their mother was singing for them and she said they had all just discussed that the girls wanted her to sing at each of their weddings and how this was their wedding and she was doing what she told them she would. At that time, I remember how you referred to Gabbie's wedding instead of her funeral and how ironic that both of you had used that term. We can tell the parents and family have strongth faith. I can't imagine losing one child, let alone 3. I guess one never knows for sure how they would handle something like that until they are in that situation.
I have to get the kids ready for bed and I just want to say thank you, Monica, for all that you are doing. You are a fabulous lady!!
Becky <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
MN USA - Wednesday, January 7, 2004 8:00 PM CST
Once when I was a little girl, I was talking to my grandmother, and she was telling me about her four year old son, who had died of what we know now to be polio. This was in 1949 or 1950 and this child had died in 1920 or so, and as she was talking, big ole tears rolled down her cheeks, and I remember thinking, in my 8 year old mind how can she still be sad over something that happened so long ago,but it didn't take many more years for me to realize that those 30 or so years were like yesterday to her and love never dies. Blessing to you and your dear family.
Dixie Bly <Dixiebly@aol.com>
Boiling Springs, SC - Tuesday, January 6, 2004 7:51 PM CST
Dear The Paquette’s: Monica, John, Aubrey, Saint Gabbie, and Noah
For some reason I am drawn to Gabbie's webpage almost daily. I am not sure if it to gain strength from your family or to give strength from mine. I read this letter the other day and thought of your family ... hope it doesn't offend and instead adds a smile to your heart if only for a moment. Thinking of your family and saying HELLO to Saint Gabbie.
~~The mother jumped up as soon as she saw the surgeon come
out of the operating room. She said: "How is my little
girl? Is she going to be all right? When can I see her?"
The surgeon said, "I'm sorry. We did all we could, but
your daughter did not make it."
The mother said, "Why do little children get cancer?
Doesn't God care any more?
Where were you, God, when my daughter needed you?"
The surgeon asked, "Would you like some time alone
with your daughter? One of the nurses will be out in a few
minutes, before she's transported to the university."
The mother asked the nurse to stay with her while she said
good-bye to her baby. She ran her fingers lovingly through
her blonde curly hair.
"Would you like a lock of her hair?" the nurse asked.
The mother nodded yes. The nurse cut a lock of the girl's
hair, put it in a plastic bag and handed it to the mother.
The mother said, "It was Amy's idea to donate her
body to the university for study.She said it might
help somebody else. I said no at first, but Amy
said, 'Mom, I won't be using it after I die. Maybe it
will help some other little child spend one more day
with their Mom.'" She went on, "My Amy had a heart of
gold. Always thinking of someone else. Always wanting
to help others if she could."
The mother walked out of Children's Mercy Hospital for the
last time, after spending most of the last six months
there. She put the bag with Amy's belongings on the
seat beside her in the car The drive home was
difficult. It was even harder to enter the empty
house. She carried Amy's belongings and the plastic
bag with the lock of her hair to her daughter's room. She
started placing the dolls and other personal
things back in her room exactly where she had always
kept them. She laid down across her bed and hugging
her pillow, cried herself to sleep.
It was around midnight when the mother awoke. Laying beside
her on the bed was a folded letter. The letter said:
"Dear Mom, I know you're going to miss me; but don't
think that I will ever forget you, or stop loving you,
just because I'm not around to say I LOVE YOU. I will
always love you, Mom, even more with each day. Someday
we will see each other again. Until then, if you want
to adopt a little girl so you won't be so lonely,
that's okay with me.She can have my room and old stuff
to play with. But, if you decide to get a boy
instead, he probably wouldn't like the same things us
girls do. You'll have to buy him cars and
stuff boys like, you know. Don't be sad thinking
about me. This really is a neat place. Grandma and
Grandpa met me as soon as I got here and showed me
around some, but it will take a long time to see
everything. The angels are so cool. I love to watch
them fly. And, you know what? Jesus doesn't look like
any of his pictures. Yet, when I saw Him, I knew it
was Him. Jesus himself took me to see GOD! And guess
what, Mom? I got to sit on God's knee and talk to Him,
like I was somebody important. That's when I told Him
that I wanted to write you a letter, to tell you
good-bye and everything. But I already knew that
wasn't allowed. Well, you know what Mom? God handed me
some paper and His own personal pen to write you this letter............ I think Gabriel is the name of the angel who is going to drop this letter off to you. God said for me to give you the answer to one of the questions you asked Him 'Where was He when I needed him?' God said He was in the same place with me, as when His son Jesus was on the cross. He was right there, as He always is with all His children.
Oh, by the way, Mom, no one else can see what I've
written except you. To everyone else this is just a
blank piece of paper. Isn't that cool? I have to give
God His pen back now............ He needs it to write
some more names in the Book of Life. Tonight I get to
sit at the table with Jesus for supper! I'm, sure the
food will be great.
Oh, I almost forgot to tell you. I don't hurt anymore.
The cancer is all gone. I'm glad because I couldn't
stand that pain anymore and God couldn't
stand to see me hurt so much, either. That's when He
sent The Angel of Mercy to come get me. The Angel said
I was a Special Delivery! How about that?
Signed with Love from: God, Jesus & Me."~~~
RMC
- Tuesday, January 6, 2004 4:27 PM CST
Just wanted to stop by and wish you all the peace and happiness that you deserve in the New Year. I am also due to give blood this week and I do it in honor of our precious angels and those children still battling this horrible disease. I know what you mean about our time remaining seeming like an eternity. I often wonder, "When will I be dere?" But I know I will be there and in the meantime, I must move on through this life. I am glad that you like my recent post. You can copy it anytime (why not? I did). I find the New Year Resolutions helpful anytime of the year. God Bless!
Laura, Ken, Nathan & ^^Angel Jillian^^ http://caringbridge.org/fl/jillian/
FL - Tuesday, January 6, 2004 9:53 AM CST
These children will certainly never be forgotten. Many nights before sleep comes when I am pondering my day, I'm amazed and somewhat shocked that I have thought more about these precious children who have gone before me than I have thought about my own, perfectly healthy children. I've come to accept this rather than berate myself for being a not so good Mom to my own. I do the best I can and have just come to accept the fact that at times these little ones, whom I've never met, invade my thoughts. And that's ok. They have made me a more conscious and caring person...No, I will never forget them and I can't wait to meet them and thank them for teaching me so much.
Mary Akagi <b.akagi@worldnet.att.net>
Maple Grove, MN - Monday, January 5, 2004 8:05 PM CST
Happy New Year! Yes, keep the faith, keep the faith and keep the faith. My daughter's name is Faith, so I always say I have Faith in every meaning of the word! Our Lord is coming and our time is little. What a blessing you have made Gabrielle's page!
God Bless you Monica,
Renne' I. Cole-Dowler <rennedowler@aol.com>
Washington, PA - Monday, January 5, 2004 8:04 PM CST
Dear MOnica,
Hey dear...just checking in to say Hi and let you know that I think of you often. Sorry I have not written lately, alot has been going on. We had to leave the country to visit my mother inlaw who is dying. My family from Richmond, VA came to visit this weekend. I was telling them about you and showed them the beautiful Dragonfly card that you made for me. Needles to say, my family now loves dragonflies too! :) Thank you so much.
I will definitely keep that family in my prayers....for the Lord to give them strength and comfort them....for only He can give enough strength to get through such a tragedy.
I wish I lived closer so I could come to your group....it sounds like "just what I need." Secular grief groups don't really bring much comfort to those who draw ALL their strength from the Lord. If it's not written in the Word....then it cannot comfort me.
Well, dear, may God bless you and your wonderful ministry. You are definitely called.....and He will bless you for your faithfulness.
With Much Love in Him,
Yvonne Fernandez......Leilani's mom
The Fernandez Family <yvonnengzs@rjia.net /// www.caringbridge.org/nc/leilani>
Mount airy, NC - Monday, January 5, 2004 4:30 PM CST
Dear Monica,
I will keep the family that lost their daughters in my prayers-- how horrible. I'll be praying too as you begin your grief support group-- I'm sure that you will be able to use your faith and journey with grief to bring comfort to others, I'm just sorry that you've had to walk this journey at all. Thinking of you and praying.
Love in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Sunday, January 4, 2004 5:36 PM CST
For those of you who have Kept my Newphews daughter in your prayers, Thank you! Maddie went to be with Jesus this morning, on her birthday! What a Birthday celebration they must be having! Again thank you Very much for your Prayers.
Deb <DV-MEYER@MSN.COM>
Prior Lake, - Sunday, January 4, 2004 1:11 PM CST
Monica - been thinking of you a lot. I know you must be breathing a huge relief w/ the holiday season being over. I am too - for different reasons than you, but just some yucky family stuff. I hope to get to see you and get to know you and your family in 2004. Love,
Mari Beth Ross <maribeth.ross@nrgenergy.com>
Hugo, MN - Sunday, January 4, 2004 0:23 AM CST
Hi,
Happy New Year...
You are in my prayers.
www.caringbridge.org/il/lucas <crazyw4k1@comcast.net>
Bridgeview, IL. USA - Saturday, January 3, 2004 10:47 PM CST
It was probably fireworks of some kind that you heard, but you truly can not be too careful anymore...our children and grandchildren do have much more to contend with, and we, too, as we provide guidance and safe haven for them. And as we look at the world, there always seems to be someone carrying more hurt and pain. I can only imagine what those Minnesota parents are going through, what their whole family is experiencing at a time that was supposed to be filled with good memories. I think of all the hurt and the mangled families: earthquakes, wars, hunger, sickness and disease, prisoners taken under duress...the list goes on and on. Better to fix my eyes on Jesus, for there will always be suffering in this world...yet there is a need to pray for these unfortunates and do what little I can to help their plights. But I know that an end will not come of it by "thinking peace and happy thoughts." I wish everyone could have the deep peace, the only peace that passeth understanding, the cleansing peace of Jesus and His promises of life everlasting with Him in Paradise. I am looking forward to having Gabbie greet me when I arrive...come Lord Jesus...the second and last time! Prayers for you and yours...Melody
Melody Bell
Baltimore, MD - Friday, January 2, 2004 8:29 PM CST
Dear Monica,
Just thinking of you today and wanted you to know-- praying for you. Hope everything is okay in your neighborhood.
With My Love and Prayers,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Friday, January 2, 2004 5:10 PM CST
HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!
Thinking of you always....
Lots of Love & hugs to you all!
Angel Sheryl
Sheryl Gunzenhauser <mik181@mchsi.com>
Winnebago, Mn - Thursday, January 1, 2004 9:19 AM CST
Monica, I am thinking of and praying for you guys this evening as I always am. I have compiled what you need and you can find it on the project list . You can delete this message in your guestbook if you'd like after you get the info. I just didn't want you to have to worry with email. Call me before you do anything just to touch base but with this we should be ready to go. Please take your time. I am CERTAIN everything will get to everyone in the Lord's timing. So, go slowly and be gentle with yourself. You have to take care of one of my dearest new(er) friends--YOU! Blessings in Christ and Happy New Year! I know the pain goes on without Gabbie here with you. I will continue to pray for your strength in Him to get through each day.
Khalita My Caringbridge Site Duke Peds BMT Aplastic Anemia <khalita@hecaresonline.org>
Lexington, NC - Wednesday, December 31, 2003 8:26 PM CST
May you all have a very Happy New Year!
Deb <DV-MEYER@MSN.COM>
Prior Lake, - Wednesday, December 31, 2003 4:49 PM CST
Hi Monica - Just wanted to stop by and Thank You so much for being such an inspiration this past year and a great witness to God. Hope you and your family have a wonderful New Year!
Bridget <bridget@mortgagesunlimited.net>
Brooklyn Park, MN - Wednesday, December 31, 2003 2:58 PM CST
I love Gabbie's little "attitude" in the photo :)! God bless your family as you enter another year w/o dear little Gabbie by your side. May Jesus' love be your comfort for '04. God bless you!
Cathy & St. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@mailstation.com>
st. paul, mn - Wednesday, December 31, 2003 2:46 PM CST
Just wanted to give you a quick note to let you know that I am still checking Gabbie's site everyday. I hope some day I do get to meet her...I hope I "get dere."
Rhonda Meyer <rschultz@scl.doc.state.mn.us>
- Wednesday, December 31, 2003 12:54 AM CST
I wish you and your family a very safe and Happy New Year.
Jennifer Miles www.caringbridge.org/mn/deemartinson <jennifer.miles@thomson.com>
Minneapolis, MN USA - Wednesday, December 31, 2003 12:44 AM CST
Dear Monica, John, Aubrey, Saint Gabbie and Noah,
Happy New Year to all of you! I think of your family often and check the website daily for your precious journaling Monica. Thanks for sharing your thoughts, feelings, and most of all Jesus on precious Gabbie's website. You will remain in my prayers-- so sorry as always for the loss of Gabbie.
With My Love and Prayers as always,
Heather (who can't wait to meet Gabbie in Heaven!!)
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Wednesday, December 31, 2003 12:11 AM CST
Dear Monica
Thankyou for your lovely entry in Michelle's guestbook. God bless you for taking time to give comfort to people like myself, at what must be a very difficult time for you.
It gives me encouragement to see that even though you Have lost your angel, you have not lost your strength or faith, something I myself worry about sometimes
You will always be in my prayers
God bless and keep you strong
love
Jacqui
jacqui fray <ladyslix@hotmail.com>
liverpool, united kingdom - Wednesday, December 31, 2003 10:54 AM CST
Monica, although it has been awhile since we have chatted, I think of you often. I love the pics of Gabbie. She is beautiful. Will contact you soon for a get together.
Lisa Schrage www.caringbridge.org/mn/cjs <schrage1@frontiernet.net>
Burnsville, MN - Monday, December 29, 2003 9:18 PM CST
Monica,
The Bible really is a difficult book. Thank you for sharing what you have read - to pray that the Spirit be with us, be our guide as we read the Bible. The new picture of Gabbie is beautiful. I like the caption. If that doesn't plant seeds, I don't know what will. Praying for you and thinking of you...
Jen Buckentine
Jen Buckentine <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Monday, December 29, 2003 6:24 PM CST
Dear Monica,
I'm so sorry to hear of your experince with the alarm-- how horrible. I thought of you all on Christmas and prayed for you. I can't imagine the pain of not having your precious Gabbie here with you. So sorry as always for your truly unspeakable loss.
My Love in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Monday, December 29, 2003 11:03 AM CST
Monica, I have set off our alarm MANY times. I don't know exactly how you felt because your circumstances are different, but I can tell you, I HATE doing that! It is unsettling to say the least. I can only imagine how difficult it must have been on Christmas Eve with missing Gabbie, trying to take care of a terrified Noah and trying to get that thing to SHUT UP! Please know that you are being thought of and prayed for. Give me a call when you are up to it and I can call you back. I'll give you the latest update then ok? Blessings to you. I love you dearly.
Khalita My Caringbridge Site Duke Peds BMT Aplastic Anemia <khalita@hecaresonline.org>
Lexington, NC - Monday, December 29, 2003 9:21 AM CST
Dear Monica,
Stunningly beautiful picture of Gabbie, and very true caption underneath.
Thank you for sharing her with us..she is so special and so very loved.
I thought of you both so much this week..and wondered how you are able to get through the holidays. I honestly cannot imagine what that must be like for you.
God Bless You.
Sara Hammer
www.caringbridge.com/mn/danielhammer <hammertime311@comast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Sunday, December 28, 2003 9:56 PM CST
Monica and John,
I was thinking about you over Christmas, as you endured yet another one without your precious Gabbie. I am sorry that you have to go through this pain. I can relate, the focus on gifts makes me a little sick at times. Monica, thank you for being so honest with your feelings. It helps to know that others feel the same pains. I am thinking of you always.
Jen Buckentine
Jen Buckentine <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Sunday, December 28, 2003 8:41 PM CST
Thinking of you all today. God bless.
Randy, Robin, Jake & Grace Boger
Lewisville, NC - Thursday, December 25, 2003 8:38 PM CST
Monica and family,
Thinking of you today and always.
Love,
Sara
Sara Hammer <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN - Thursday, December 25, 2003 8:30 PM CST
A Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year
Nancy Hotzfeld <nancy.hotzfeld@verizon.net>
Merrill, Wi USA - Thursday, December 25, 2003 8:13 PM CST
Have a Very Merry Chritmas and Happy Healthy New Year.
Love Amy*
Amy’s Fight
Amy Mareck <brownhair25@hotmail.com>
- Thursday, December 25, 2003 11:43 AM CST
Thinking you of you today.
With love and prayers,
Jackson's mom, Michelle
- Thursday, December 25, 2003 5:56 AM CST
Praying for peace in your heart this holiday season.
Much love...
Terry Snyder (Angel Jalen's "Am-Maw") http://www.caringbridge.org/fl/jalen <vix207@aol.com>
Royal Palm Beach, FL - Wednesday, December 24, 2003 6:28 PM CST
Gabrielle really did touch so many lives, and still does from Heaven. Thinking of you....
Love, hugs and prayers,
Rhonda, Eddie and Connor
**Connor's page**
<rshunley@comcast.net>
Hendersonville, TN God bless America! - Wednesday, December 24, 2003 10:56 AM CST
Dearest Paquettes-
Wishing you a blessed Christmas and a peaceful 2004.
Merry Christmas, Gabbie!!!
Chemo Angel Kelly
Kelly Christoferson <kelly9672@yahoo.com>
Otsego, MN USA!!! - Tuesday, December 23, 2003 3:23 PM CST
Monica, I'm still reading your entries daily, still being inspired by your words of wisdom and still holding your family in my prayers. I know the wordly things of Christmas must overwhelm you (like how you felt when you went shopping at the mall), but I wish you and your family all the peace and joy that comes from remembering the true, biblical meaning behind the season. You are thought of often...Gabbie is thought of often...even though I don't write often enough.
Lisa Kennedy <Lisa.Kennedy@co.anoka.mn.us>
MN - Tuesday, December 23, 2003 11:31 AM CST
Dear Paquette Family,
Wishing you a very merry Christmas and a happy 2004!
Bernadette Cassidy <Bernadette.Cassidy@us.ing.com>
Minneapolis, Mn USA - Tuesday, December 23, 2003 11:12 AM CST
Monica, John & family,
We pray the Lord's blessings upon your family...may peace and the gentle joy of the Christ Child be with you. Let's plan a get-together in the new year :)! Merry Christmas!
Love and God bless,
Nate, Cathy & St. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@mailstation.com>
St. Paul, MN USA - Tuesday, December 23, 2003 10:22 AM CST
I said a CHRISTMAS PRAYER for you
because the season's near
I didn't ask for riches
but for gifts so much more dear.
I asked for joyful gatherings
with your family all around.
and for carols to inspire you
with their old familiar sounds.
I asked for quiet moments
in your heart on Christmas morn,
for a special time to celebrate
the Savior who was born.
I asked for friends to send their best
that you might know they care....
I asked for peace & love & hope;
and I know God heard my prayer.
Author Nancy Brummett Abbey Press
Nancy Hotzfeld <nancy.hotzfeld@verizon.net>
Merrill , Wi USA - Monday, December 22, 2003 9:53 PM CST
Monica, once again I have visited Gabbie's site and gotten something that I needed. Yes, we are unworthy and yes, it is only by God's grace that we are not doomed. I am so very sorry that people had been drinking at Gabbie's funeral. I don't know what to say other than I am sorry that their actions may have caused another ounce of pain as if losing your sweet child was not enough. God bless you all during the Christmas season as we celebrate the birth of the one who makes it possible for us to receive his grace.
Robin Boger
Lewisville, NC - Monday, December 22, 2003 7:46 PM CST
Monica,
Thinking and praying for you and your family during this holiday season. . .
Always in my thoughts and prayers!!
PS: sorry I have not written in here lately. I've been sick and this time of the year is busy at work.
Becky <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
MN USA - Monday, December 22, 2003 10:46 AM CST
Monica,
My dear sister in Christ..... may you be held ever tighter in His grip as you traverse this season of your life. Please remember you are never alone because there are many of us out here lifting you and your family up in prayer. I wish you the greatest of all peace. Christmas blessings to you John, Aubrey and little Noah man.
Christy <calee59@wi.rr.com>
S. Milwaukee, wi - Sunday, December 21, 2003 9:55 PM CST
Monica,
My heart aches for and with you... My Lukie is forever tugging at my heart as my other 2 children tug at my hands... I don't imagine we will ever be "ok"... We will pray with you for peace...Love, the Ervin's
Ivy <www.caringbridge.org/oh/lukeervin ivymeadows@earthlink.net>
Mansfield , Ohio - Saturday, December 20, 2003 9:22 PM CST
Monica,
When people read that you wrote unworthy servant, they may tend to disagree as you are such a light to so many. I feel that you wrote that because we all are unworthy. If we were judged according to our lives and how we walk, surely we all would be left behind. We do fail every day. We are certainly unworthy. That is why the Lord died for our sins, as we will never be worthy. It is His price, by His grace. The amazing love sent from above, which is why we celebrate His birth and His Life. I would believe, when God looks at Gabbie, He will say well done my good and faithful servant. And to you, her momma, I believe He will say the same for the work that you are doing to serve Him and others. Good and Faithful Servant. None are worthy.
Thank you for your thoughts and love. :)
Jackson's mom, Michelle
Clear Lake, Wisconsin - Saturday, December 20, 2003 8:35 PM CST
Dear Monica,
I wish I had something to make it even a little less painful for you, but I know I cannot. Just know I a praying for you. I also have a favorite verse I would like to share with you.
Isaiah 40:31
"But they that wait upon the LORD
shall renew their strength;
they shall mount up with wings as EAGLES
they shall run, and not be weary;
and they shall walk, and not faint"
May you feel the loving arms of Our Father around you,
Renne' I. Cole-Dowler <rennedowler@aol.com>
Washington, PA - Saturday, December 20, 2003 7:58 PM CST
Monica, that is so sad that people were intoxicated. Even more potent was your last entry and you transposed wedding for funeral. That breaks my heart. I felt overwhelmed with sadness thinking about that.
a sad friend <minneapolis@mn.com>
minneapolis, - Saturday, December 20, 2003 2:00 PM CST
Monica- I hope you do not not gat mad at me but so many people read your site and I would like to ask if they could keep my step-nephews daughter in their prayers also her site is http://caringbridge.org/mn/maddiej/ thank you-
Deb <DV-MEYER@MSN.COM>
Prior Lake, - Saturday, December 20, 2003 12:11 AM CST
Monica- I too shutter to think that you think area "unworthy servant" Please do not feel that way- I know he does not want you to feel that way! I feel so badly for you, I can not imagine losing a child and having to deal with the pressure of people thinking you should be bouncing back to normal. Your lives are forever altered. However I do believe you will find the peace you deserve in your own time. Know that you are thought of daily and in many many prayers. May you and your family have a peace filled Christmas.
Deb <DV-MEYER@MSN.COM>
- Friday, December 19, 2003 8:59 PM CST
Monica, I found your website from another at caringbridge. I never wrote before because spiritually we are from very different places. However I hate to see you write "Your unworthy servant" on your website or for you to put yourself down in any way. Please Monica be kinder to yourself. There is no "right" or "polite" way to grief and no magic time table. It is an active process of surviving. I can't imagine that you ever get over the death of a child. It is a life changing altering experience. Life never returns to normal. Normal is redefined though the grief process and new revelations. Anyone who suggests that you should be over anything is an imbecile, plain and simple. As far as people being drunk at Gabbie's Funeral - thank goodness you didn't know then. But that is weakness - plain and simple. They couldn't stand to be there sober, I guess. For them it was probably just too tragic and dreadful. I don't think that they did it meaning any disrespect to you or to devalue Gabbie's life. I don't mean to make excuses (I am not a drinker) but I hate that their actions could have a caused a grieving parent any additional pain. You are a brave strong, inspiring woman. So Monica please take extra special care of just you!! Gabbie was an exceptional, beautiful child who suffering is just incomprehensible. I hope that you and your family have as peaceful a holiday season as possible. Bless you all.
Rebecca
nj - Friday, December 19, 2003 1:36 PM CST
Monica, I found your website from another at caringbridge. I never wrote before because spiritually we are from very different places. However I hate to see you write "Your unworthy servant" on your website or for you to put yourself down in any way. Please Monica be kinder to yourself. There is no "right" or "polite" way to grief and no magic time table. It is an active process of surviving. You can never get over the death of a child. It is a life changing altering experience. Life never returns to normal. Normal is redefined though the grief process and new revelations. Anyone who suggests that you should be over anything is an imbecile, plain and simple. As far as people being drunk at Gabbie's Funeral - thank goodness you didn't know then. But that is weakness - plain and simple. They couldn't stand to be there sober, I guess. For them it was probably just too tragic and dreadful. I don't think that they did it meaning any disrespect to you or to devalue Gabbie's life. I don't mean to make excuses ( I am not a drinker) but I hate that their actions could have a caused a grieving parent any additional pain. I am simply in awe of any family, particularly a mother, who can survive the loss of a child. So Monica please take extra special care of just you!! Gabbie was an exceptional, beautiful child who suffering is just incomprehensible. I hope that you and your family have as peaceful a holiday season as possible. Bless you all.
Rebecca
nj - Friday, December 19, 2003 1:33 PM CST
Monica, your ability to get up each day and get on with your daily activities is a testament to your survival skills. Just doing that, is coping enough, because I know although you do have Noah & Aubrey, you loved Gabbie more than life itself. Now mind you, I didnt say you had to do any of those daily activities well, I just said you had to wake up and face each day head on.....
Chris ~ Gooch's Site ~
- Friday, December 19, 2003 1:05 PM CST
Monica,
Take as much time as you need.....I will always be here.
Andrea
- Friday, December 19, 2003 9:50 AM CST
"How blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked, nor stands in the path of sinners, nor sits in the seat of scoffers!" Psalm 1:1
I know that this verse was written with our actions towards God in mind...how we shouldn't be drawn into the influences of the world on an ever more vile level. But when I read what you wrote today, those verses came to mind in a different light. You will be blessed by God in a special way because you aren't succumbing to the pressures of the world to box up your grief for Gabbie...hang in there! Many scoff at this deep grief--"get over it already and get on with life!"--but they truly do not understand and are blind to their own ignorance. They want you to stand with them, to walk their path, to take on their words...but it can not be! Continue to stand strong in your grief and remember all that Gabriel meant to you...you will never "get over" the heavy heart of losing her...the love was too deep. But you can continue to walk in God's way, to stand with Him, to take on His words...and you are doing this so beautifully as evidenced on this site. "Blessed are those that mourn, for they shall be comforted." Our only comfort is found in the Lord...we mourn things that we have lost so profoundly...you, Gabbie...all of us, the lost relationship with God because of our own sin. But He can and does bring comfort...it is His holy and faithful promise of forgiveness and eternal life for those who repent and believe! If you have to be without Gabbie on this earth, at least we can rejoice in knowing that she has found her forever comfort in God already, in His loving arms where she no longer has to confront hurt and pain like you do. We can find comfort in being able to shout with sincerity, "Yes, Gabbie, we will be dere," for we have trusted our souls to Him, and we will meet you some day...Praise God!
I am so sorry that you have to deal with other people's lack of concern and trite ways...all ignorance...a sure reminder of our own fallen and sinful ways. I pray for God's protection of your emotions and sanity at this time.
"But his delight is in the law of the LORD, and in His law he meditates day and night. He will be like a tree firmly planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in its season, and its leaf does not wither; and in whatever he does he prospers." [Ps. 1:2-3]
Monica, this promise is for you! Continue to seek Him and devour His teachings as you do...you will not wither away but become stronger and fuller! When I see how you have touched the lives of so many people because of your willingness to grieve openly before God and man while holding on to Him, you surely have prospered.
Sorry for the "sermon"...I hope that it comes as encouragement to you. I wish I could be there to share your load personally...I thank God that others are! God's blessings on you this season and always, dear sister in Christ...Melody
Melody Bell
Baltimore, MD - Thursday, December 18, 2003 10:08 PM CST
Monica,
I'm thinking of you tonight. You take time to just collect your thoughts - take the time that you need. It amazes me that you can update Gabbie's site nearly every day. I am sad for you, for all the pain you have to go through. I wish people would have treated Gabbie differently, would have treated you differently. I wish she never had to die. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and feelings and your love of Christ with us all. Take care of yourself.
Love, Jen Buckentine <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Thursday, December 18, 2003 9:38 PM CST
Monica,
I just want to say that I am so proud of you. You are finding your own way and I admire you so much for that.
You are so very special, honest, and sincere. I am so humbled and I have tried to become a better person because of you. You deserve a lot of credit for the many ways in which you have positively touched people's lives.
God Bless You.
Take Gentle Care,
Sara
Sara Hammer <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Thursday, December 18, 2003 8:44 PM CST
Monica,
Why do you apologize for your grief?? I think that what you have gone through has to be the most heart-wrenching, life-stealing experience ever. To come through with your faith intact is a miracle in itself. My personal opinion (for what it's worth) is you should take all the time you need to grieve and heal. If you need to get angry about things that happened when Gabbie died, that is what you need to do. Maybe that will be a step you have to take to start getting through it. I know you will never be OVER her death and why would you want to be?? This is YOUR process, so work through it however you need to and please don't let anyone else make you feel like you should be "over it" by now. God must have known that you would need those words of encouragement fm that co-worker today. May you always have someone to get you through those kind of moments. I think if Gabbie could say anything to you right now, it would be "it's ok Mom". Hang in there my friend.
Christy <calee59@wi.rr.com>
South Milwaukee, wi - Thursday, December 18, 2003 8:44 PM CST
Christmas is everyday isn't it? Everything happens in God's timing. Since you don't have the stuff yet, I don't feel so badly that you don't have the list yet either. They'll get there when God means for them to get there. Let me know when the stuff is in and in the meantime, I'll keep working on the list, ok? Take care. And don't worry about anything. Take all the time you need for YOU! Everything else is secondary. I wish I could give you a hug. I can't imagine how you feel. I will be lifting you up to the Lord continually. Blessings!
Khalita My Caringbridge Site Duke Peds BMT Aplastic Anemia <khalita@hecaresonline.org>
Lexington, NC, - Thursday, December 18, 2003 7:45 PM CST
Dear Monica,
I'm so sorry for your deep hurt and the fact that people did not respect, honor and love Gabbie the way she so truly deserved. I have no idea how you feel, I do know it must be unspeakably difficult for you. Know I care and that I'm praying for you and John too.
My Love in Christ,
Heather (who can't wait to hug Gabbie in Heaven-I'll be dere!!)
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Thursday, December 18, 2003 7:16 PM CST
Our lives have come to a similarity in many ways, and I always appreciate your honesty.
A few people I know just didn't come to see Jackson at all, out of their own issues or excuses. They also talked down about me and my faith and the decisions that I made. The reason that it is so hard to get over and move on, is because the pain and disappointment is so deep. Why is it so deep? Because we love our child that much. We could never imagine being that cruel to disregard the life of a child. Even as a strong Christian, and believing in forgiveness of others, that is a very hard and a deeply emotional battle to conquer.
The holidays are always hard, just as the birthdays...but every day truly is hard to endure. It is only the peace from the Spirit that brings comfort and peace. May you be filled with His Prescence this Christmas season and always.
Your friend, Michelle
Clear Lake, Wisconsin - Thursday, December 18, 2003 7:08 PM CST
Monica, I'm trying...really I am. I will make sure you have the list before Friday ok? Thanks for being so patient. By the way, did the stuff come in? You can just leave a message on my guestbook or call my cell if that's easier. I know email hasn't been that kind to you lately. Take care. Hugs, blessings and thanks so much for all your help!
Khalita My Caringbridge Site Duke Peds BMT Aplastic Anemia <khalita@hecaresonline.org>
Lexington, NC, - Wednesday, December 17, 2003 8:58 PM CST
Monica,
God bless you and your family as we enter the last week of Advent...may we all wait in joyful hope for the coming of our Savior, Jesus Christ.
Much love,
Cathy & St. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose; weloveteesa@mailstation.com>
St. Paul, MN - Wednesday, December 17, 2003 1:24 PM CST
Here's a few more links that you might find helpful. I forgot to tack them onto my first email...
http://mnges.easter-seals.org/site/PageServer?pagename=MNDR_AVTarget_partnership
http://www.mnzoo.com/guests/donorlist.asp
http://www.lssmn.org/range/youth_rangedontate.htm
http://www.mcf.org/mcf/whatsnew/archives/Nov2003/forbes031104.htm
Sara (again) <sfrek1214@earthlink.net>
- Wednesday, December 17, 2003 11:54 AM CST
Hi Monica,
I share your recent frustrations with the Target products. I found this web site that will hopefully help-- it has a list of all the companies and organizations in MN that Target has donated to this year.
http://www.targetcorp.com/targetcorp_group/community/rep_grants.jhtml
Thank you for continuing to journal here and for all you do to encourage people to find Jesus. Sending warm thoughts and prayers to you and your family!
Sara Freking <sfrek1214@earthlink.net>
Red Wing, MN USA - Wednesday, December 17, 2003 11:48 AM CST
Dearest Family
I gently wrap warm thoughts of you
in my little christmas prayers
For Heaven to smile on you
For Angels to watch over you
and the love of Jesus to fill your heart
Have A Merry Christmas
God Bless You And Your Family This Holiday
Chris Ullrich - Grand daughter dx with AML M5 <c_ullrich@msn.com, www.caringbridge.com/page/isabellaledesma >
Hemingford, Ne USA - Wednesday, December 17, 2003 10:56 AM CST
Thank you very much for the book you sent me. I have not had time to open it yet as we also have "the sickness" running through our house. I will make the time very soon. Thanks again. I'm sure that every day is a struggle without Gabbie. Unfortunately, Christmas is the one time of year it seems everyone focuses on family, even though it should be everyday (I am as guilty as most). I'm sure you are missing her more than ever right now and you are truely in our thoughts and prayers every day.
Rhonda Meyer <rschultz@scl.doc.state.mn.us>
- Tuesday, December 16, 2003 10:45 AM CST
Monica,
So glad that Noah and Aubrey are feeling better! Just wanted you to know that I'm here and I'm reading and praying and that most of all that I care. Your necklace sounds beautiful, what a wonderful way to share Gabbie and her profound question. I'm so sorry for your deep hurt and that some people just don't understand your grief and longing for Gabbie will never end until you see her in Heaven-- you grieve with Hope, but you grieve all the same.
My prayers for your whole family during the Holidays that must be incredibly difficult.
With Love in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Tuesday, December 16, 2003 7:29 AM CST
Dear Monica, I'm glad your little ones are feeling better. I'm sorry it's been awhile since I've signed in. I've been out of town a lot for work & under the weather myself. I have started reading my book you recommended...definitely the best on the subject for my needs. Thank you. Thinking of you all this holiday season. God bless.
Robin Boger <Robin.Boger@rbc.com>
Lewisville, NC - Monday, December 15, 2003 8:36 PM CST
Dear Monica,
I hope Noah is getting over his virus and rash!
I'm glad Aubrey is feeling better.
There is so much junk going around..I think out of all the people I know, more are sick right now (with cold, viruses, flu, infections) than are well!
Gabbie certainly does have the most extraordinary eyes..They are soooo beautiful. And you know they say the eyes are the windows to the soul..I believe it!!
I also think of all the beautiful things she is seeing now with those eyes! Things we all are hoping to be good enough to see one day!
I am with you also on knowing I would not be able to endure what Gabbie and these other children have had to endure, medically speaking. I also would have to take the path least
resistence. I don't know how these children endure this as heroically as they all do. It blows my mind.
I wish Aubrey and your little Noah man, and you and John, good health throughout the rest of this nasty cold and flu season!
God Bless,
With Love and Prayers Always,
Sara
The Hammer's <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Monday, December 15, 2003 9:10 AM CST
Hi Guys,
Just wanted to stop by and spread a little holiday cheer. May you all have a blessed holiday season and a joyous New Year. GOD BLESS. Sending lots of love from above - ANGEL COLBY JAMES COLE AND CREW.
(forever missing our precious angels)
jack - colby's daddy forever and ever
www.caringbridge.org/pa/colby, UNIONTOWN PA - Sunday, December 14, 2003 11:22 PM CST
Hi Monica! I just wanted to stop by, say hi and tell you that I'm praying for you today. I hope the kids are better soon. God bless
jan livingstone (Andy's Mom forever)
- Sunday, December 14, 2003 4:34 PM CST
Yikes, when it rains it pours doesn't it??? There have been a couple of times in the last week that I have thought I just can't handle everything I've got to do and I've wanted to sit down and bawl like a baby. Funny, how this joyous season seems to create more stress than joy. I remember you had an entry not too long ago where you talked about how chaotic your household was. For some reason it came to mind and I was able to take a couple of deep breaths and pray about things. To know that there are others out there that are not supermoms/wives/Christians makes me feel SOOOO much better. When I find the time to squeeze in a visit here, I can always count on redirection to what is important. I know that whatever may be going on in my life, it could always be worse and I need to count my blessings and cry out to HIM to keep me on track. Thanks so much, you help in so many other ways than just spreading the gospel. Have a great week and hope the kids are feeling better soon.
Christy <calee59@wi.rr.com>
South Milwaukee, WI - Sunday, December 14, 2003 3:09 PM CST
Thinking of you my friend! Wish you all a very Merry Christmas!
With Much Love in Him,
Yvonne.......Leilani's mommy
The Fernandez Family <yvonnengzs@rjia.net /// www.caringbridge.org/nc/leilani>
Mount Airy, NC - Sunday, December 14, 2003 9:41 AM CST
Praying that EVERYONE in your household is feeling better soon. I am working on the list today and will send it as soon as I'm finished. I know it's terribly hard without Gabbie. Know that you're constantly in my thoughts and prayers. Blessings and lots of love to you from NC.
Khalita My Caringbridge Site Duke Peds BMT Aplastic Anemia <khalita@hecaresonline.org>
Lexington, NC, - Saturday, December 13, 2003 10:05 AM CST
Dear Monica,
I am glad Noah is healing, and understand the misunderstanding of antibiotics, as I have had 31 years of the same. I will keep Aubrey in prayer, as she is in need.
I am trying to comprehend the flow of your page, so please forgive me if I get discombobulated.
I am praying, praying and praying and sending a lot of love.
Renne' I. Cole-Dowler <rennedowler@aol.com>
Washington, PA - Friday, December 12, 2003 9:19 PM CST
Monica,
Noah and Aubrey are in our prayers in a special way this weekend. May they both be on the mend and restored to health quickly!
Love and blessings to you all,
Cathy and St. Theresa Rose <WeLoveTeesa@mailstation.com; www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose>
St. Paul, MN - Friday, December 12, 2003 2:47 PM CST
Dear Paquette Family,
Praying for ALL of you to regain good health and for more sleep! Baby Noah man, I wish I were closer to you so I could rock and rock you and let Mom and Dad and Aubrey get a good night's sleep! I have a wonderful grandma's lap and you would fit really well. But for now I will pray for our Lord Jesus to sing you a lullaby and keep you in dreamland all night. Will be waiting to hear what the Ped. says re: Noah's rash. God bless you all.
Love, Kathy
Kathy Welch <abbysmamaa@yahoo.com>
Lexington, Ohio USA - Thursday, December 11, 2003 7:01 PM CST
Hi Monica,
I heard one of my favorite songs yesterday while running and immediatly thought of you and all you share on Gabbie's sight so I thought I'd share the words here:
Wisdom—Twila Paris
I see a multitude of people
Some far away and some close by
They weave together new religions
From tiny remnants they have found
A bit of truth, a greater lie
And all the prophets stand and sing a pleasant song
A million cords to bind the spirit growing strong
My heart is breaking I must remind them
You are the only way
You are the only voice
You are the only hope
You are the only choice
You are the one true God
No matter what we say
You are the breath of life
You are the only way
We need you here today
Give us wisdom
Give us wisdom
There is moment of decision
But all the days go rushing by
An undercurrent of confusion
To threaten all that we believe
With little time to wonder why
And all the prophets sing the same familiar tune
Even the chosen can be lead to sing along
These hearts are breaking
Will you remind us
You choose the simple things to over come the wise
Wisdom is granted in the name of Jesus Christ
In the name of Jesus Christ.
It's so very true His is the Only Way, The Only Truth, the Only light. Thanks for sharing the truth so openly! You are an amazing missionary! :)
My Love to you my sister in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Thursday, December 11, 2003 6:08 PM CST
I hope Noah is starting to feel better. Regan has been home sick all week with the Flu (no flu shots to be had around here) and is starting to feel better now.
We are thinking of you.
Jennifer Yseth <j.yseth@mchsi.com>
Brookings, SD 57006 - Thursday, December 11, 2003 12:22 AM CST
Hi Monica:
Thank you for continuing to share the Word to everyone. You have touched so many lives. I came across another Caringbridge site today of a little boy that desperately needs prayers. I know your site gets so many hits so maybe you can spread the word? The address is http://www.caringbridge.org/mn/christopherpeters/. I'm sorry I've not been in touch for awhile - I had a surgery about 3 weeks ago, but am finally feeling much better. Talk to you soon.
Mari Beth Ross <maribeth.ross@nrgenergy.com>
Hugo, Mn - Wednesday, December 10, 2003 11:00 PM CST
Hi Monica,
I hope little Noah is feeling better!
Whatever nasty virus he has I hope he gets rid of soon!
I'm sorry to hear they ran out of the flu shot and he can't finish his dose.
What a great thing to ponder the many names of Jesus!
Thank you for mentioning that!
I completely understand where you are coming from with not caring about your mammogram. I have also been guilty of neglecting my health as we deal with Daniel's many issues. But having said that, I also care about you and hope you will take gentle care of yourself and your health.
You and Saint Gabbie (and your whole family!) are so very precious!
God Bless!
Love,
Sara
www.caringbridge.com/mn/danielhammer <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Wednesday, December 10, 2003 9:54 PM CST
Monica, please think about getting a mammogram, for your children and husband. They need their Mommy/Wife around becasue they love so you much.
With Hugs,
A Concerned Friend that just wants you to take care of yourself.
A Concerned Friend <afriend@yahoo.com>
- Wednesday, December 10, 2003 7:15 PM CST
Wow! You are amazing and I can't thank you enough for sharing parts of the bible with me and so many others daily! I feel renewed everytime I visit and learn new things! This along with all the other emotions you must be feeling over the loss of such a beautiful child. Thank you and God bless your family!
Stephanie <ocean7369@yahoo.com>
Sacramento, CA - Wednesday, December 10, 2003 6:11 PM CST
So glad to hear you're on 'solid' ground again and that the trip went well in spite of the 'incidents'. Thank you for reminding us of the return of Jesus too. I don't forget it often as it is such an anticipated event and then we'll all be 'home' and reunited and eternity will be beyond description. In the meantime we deal with daily results of this world which include sickness. I hope Noah is better soon but like someone already mentioned, I imagine it is viral if the antibiotics aren't working. Still it's hard to see little Noah feverish and feeling so bad. Enjoy the time holding him and caring for him. He'll soon be grown and you'll be old like me!!
Suzanne
Gardner, KS USA - Wednesday, December 10, 2003 10:33 AM CST
Hi Monica and family,
So glad to hear that the trip went well, although it wasn't without incident. Paring knife and a Christmas tree, huh? (Likely story! ;)
Bless little Noah's heart! I hope he's feeling better soon and that he doesn't share whatever it is that he's picked up with the rest of you! There are some really nasty bugs going around everywhere and it sounds like he may have a viral infection with still having a temp even while on antibiotics. I wish I were there to take a turn rocking...you miss that stuff when your 'baby' is 18.
I loved your entry today. I can not wait for the return of Jesus! What a day that will be!! His goodness is beyond bounds and His mercy is endless. To praise Him and be able to touch Him and look upon Him will be glory, indeed! Amen, come Lord Jesus!
Your sis in Him,
Suz
Susan King <suznk_01@yahoo.com>
Phoenix, AZ United States - Wednesday, December 10, 2003 0:51 AM CST
Monica,
I hope your little Noah feels better soon! There is sooo much stuff going around and it sounds like he has caught a very
tough little bug. I hope he will shake it soon!
I was thinking a lot today about when Jesus will return.
And I was praying it will be soon.
I remember about 5 years ago, that thought frightened me..(the end of the world as we know it)
Now I look forward to it. I was also wondering today about other things..like what happens when a woman is pregnant, like I am. I know eveyrthing will be perfect but it's stuff like that that we think about..our human minds are much too small to understand. When that day comes, I will certinly rejoice!
Even though I am so very unworthy, I hope the Lord will see my heart is humble and how much love I have for him. I hope I am good enough! Even though I am a miserable sinner, if my undying love for the Lord counts, I will be dere.
Thank you for sharing your words with us!
I pray Noah shakes this bug and feels better soon!
I will keep checking back for updates on the little man!
Love in Christ,
Sara
www.caringbridge.com/mn/danielhammer <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN - Tuesday, December 9, 2003 11:13 PM CST
Monica,
Thank you for the reminder - we do not know when Jesus will return, but it could be very soon. We all must be prepared.
I am glad to hear that your trip to Boston was safe and sound. I was thinking about you yesterday. I am sorry to hear that Noah still isn't feeling well. That poor little pumpkin. Good luck at the doctor tomorrow. I will say an extra prayer for him tonight, that he will be feeling better very soon. Take care.
Love, Jen, Bill, Brady and Saint Zachary Buckentine <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Tuesday, December 9, 2003 9:52 PM CST
That'll teach me not to listen. God nudged me several times throughout the day to call you. I kept saying "she's at work, I'll call tonight". Then tonight rolled around and it's now too late. Now I stop by your site and see that you were HOME today and I could have called you!! Surprise, surprise, God KNEW you were home and that's why I kept getting the "inkling" to call you! I need to listen better. I'll call soon--no hurry. Things will get done. Thank you so much for continuing to share the gospel boldly. Your strength gives me strength. I certainly hope it works the other way as well. I'm here for you and am certainly continually lifting you up in prayer. Talk to you soon!
Khalita My Caringbridge Site Duke Peds BMT Aplastic Anemia <khalita@hecaresonline.org>
Lexington, NC, - Tuesday, December 9, 2003 9:18 PM CST
Monica,
I don't always sign on here...seems like we keep in contact and I don't always let you know that I am checking in here. But I am, everyday. Your entries help to keep me focused. Our thoughts are so similar. I just wanted to say, again, how grateful that I am for your friendship in my life. You are a blessing to me. And always, always, thankful for our children that allowed our paths to cross, and mostly for our Lord who keeps us focused especially in this life of heartache without the children. Where would we be without His comfort and the focus that He has brought us to? I appreciate your honesty and effort in all that you do.
Jackson's mom, Michelle*www.caringbridge.com/wi/jacksons.journey* <eaglet@cltcomm.net>
- Tuesday, December 9, 2003 8:59 PM CST
Dear Monica,
Amen to what you wrote today-- we never know when Jesus might return so the time to seek Him is indeed now. Thanks for sharing that so openly on your site. Glad your flight went okay and that you made it home safe and sound. Hope that your precious little Noah man gets better really soon.
Love in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@Insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Tuesday, December 9, 2003 8:29 PM CST
Get well soon precious little Noah man! Monica, so glad your trip went OK and that you are back home safely. Took Abigail for a flu shot today; it was quite an adventure as all of us not wise enough to get them in October scrambled for the last few doses available here today. Another well written journal entry today. God bless you. Love, Kathy
Kathy Welch <abbysmamaa@yahoo.com>
Lexington, Ohio USA - Tuesday, December 9, 2003 8:24 PM CST
Dear Monica,
You are so right – the end is near. The signs are everywhere and honestly, in our cruel world that we are living in I feel we are already on borrowed time. He will come swiftly, so we need to be prepared and help to prepare others.
I will keep Noah in my prayers and will believe for a swift healing of his illness.
Also, there is never any need to thank anyone for doing God’s work as we are called to do. It is our job and duty. We are blessed to be able to do so.
God Bless,
Renne' I. Cole-Dowler <rennedowler@aol.com>
Washington, PA - Tuesday, December 9, 2003 6:43 PM CST
Let us know how your trip was and hopefully you'll be back all cozy in the morning. I guess the weather out there isn't too good but maybe you saw your blizzard!
Suzanne
Gardner, KS USA - Monday, December 8, 2003 10:31 PM CST
Monica,
There are just some people in this world that have to pass judgement. Not only do they have to pass judgement, but do so in a cruel way. Nothing that you journal is in any way telling us that you "know it all".
If people feel a need to be cruel to others, why can't they do it with dignity. Sign their name to it! I would say that is a cowardly way of voicing their opinions. Why not keep it out of Gabbie's site. This little angel most definately doesn't deserve to have such ridicule.
I believe this site is here not only in honor of Gabbie, but as a place of healing for her parents and others that struggle with cancer and such devistation. And, in Gabbie's name, let's keep it going for those reasons!
God Bless!
Sandy Kleinfehn <kleinfehn_mom@hotmail.com>
Melrose, MN - Monday, December 8, 2003 6:49 PM CST
Stopped bye to let you all know that you are in our thoughts and prayers. GOD BLESS. We too share in your pain, emptiness, and sorrow, and would not have made it thru it all with out GOD. "THANKS BE TO GOD." I too just watched the chanel 11 news cast, and was quite taken!!! The pain of seeing a very sick child alone is heart breaking. However, as you and I both know, the pain of losing a child is unbearable - unless you find Jesus!!! AMEN. Hope to chat with you more in the future - sending lots of love from above - ANGEL COLBY JAMES COLE AND CREW. (forever missing our precious angels)
jack - colby's daddy forever and ever
www.caringbridge.org/pa/colby, UNIONTOWN PA - Sunday, December 7, 2003 10:04 PM CST
Dear Monica,
I have just found this page. I have been signing the CaringBridge since February of this year, yet never found you until now. Please let me say that I am sorry for not being here for you and your family. But please know that I am here now and my prayers will be constant.
Last night you signed a guestbook of an Angel “Jaydog” - his mother and family really need to hear the words you wrote. God has placed her on my heart in a very special way. Thank you for your post, as I feel like God is calling the “prayer warriors” to the page.
I have spent a great deal of time reading your journal – what an amazing woman you are. God is with you and I can feel his presence in the pages. I am so glad you are a part of the CaringBridge and continue to profess the love of Our Heavenly Father. Your strength and wisdom are amazing to me. Unfortunately I missed church today, due to a medical problem, but I feel like I have had a years worth of testimony through God’s Word just reading from “Saint Gabbie’s” page! Thank you for touching me. I fell blessed.
Watching the channel eleven-news segment sent me into a flurry of tears. Mere words are not enough, but I am so very sorry and wish it were not true. She was and is beautiful.
In Christ’s Love,
Renne' I. Cole-Dowler <rennedowler@aol.com>
Washington, PA - Sunday, December 7, 2003 12:38 AM CST
Monica,
Thanks for signing Mason's website. What adorable children you have. Happy Holidays and know that you have a special angel in heaven watching over you. You may have read this before:
I see the countless Christmas trees around the world below; with tiny lights like Heaven's stars reflecting on the snow. The sight is so specitacular please wipe away the tear; For I am spending Christmas with Jesus Christ this year. I hear the many Christmas songs that people hold so dear; But the sounds of music can't compare with the Christmas choir up here. For I have no words to tell you the joy their voices bring; it is beyond description to hear the angels sing. I know how much you miss me, but please remember dear; That I am spending Christmas with Jesus Christ this year. I cannot tell you of the slendor of the peace inside this place. Can you just imagine Christmas with Our Savior, face to face? I will ask Him to light your spirit as I tell Him of your love; So pray for one another as you lift your eyes above. Please let your hearts beat joyful and let your spirit sing; For I am spending Christmas in Heaven and walking with the King.
author unknown.
Sandy Jergens <sandyjerg@aol.com>
delano, mn usa - Sunday, December 7, 2003 9:48 AM CST
Monica,
As always, you have given us food for thought. Coming to Gabbie's site always makes me stop and focus on what is important. I soooo appreciate you for taking the time to really think about what you put on her page. Especially during this time of the year when it is so easy to lose sight of what it's all about. I'm redirected now, so I can get going! Have a safe trip on Monday. Maybe you actually see that blizzard you been looking for??? (hehe) At least the after effects of it anyway! After almost 5 years in Florida, we're looking forward to some snow (notice I said "some"). Have a wonderful weekend!
Christy <calee59@wi.rr.com>
South Milwaukee, WI - Saturday, December 6, 2003 12:20 AM CST
Monica,
Praying for a safe and stress-free flight on Monday. I'm glad you're not flying to the east coast tonight! We've had several inches of snow today here. As usual, I'm loving it and Keith is complaining. Aaron feels better after suffering with the flu all week. I worry about him when he is sick and mom isn't there. I guess we never retire from motherhood! Love,Kathy
Kathy Welch <abbysmamaa@yahoo.com>
Lexington, Ohio USA - Friday, December 5, 2003 7:29 PM CST
I've been wanting to sign in for a couple days but haven't because I was not sure what to say, so I'll just say god bless you, Gabbie is always in my thoughts, she truly is a special child. Have a good weekend.
sally torres <sally_torres@lusknet.com>
- Friday, December 5, 2003 5:54 PM CST
Hi Monica,
I hope you have a safe trip to Boston and hope little Noah is feeling better too!
I'm sure John will do a great job holding down the fort while you are gone too.
"Ask, Seek and Knock." Great words and reminders for us all!
Thank you!
Love and Blessings,
Sara
www.caringbridge.com/mn/danielhammer <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Friday, December 5, 2003 5:32 PM CST
"He comes to us in the brokenness of our health, in the shipwreck of our family lives, in the loss of all possible peace of mind, even in the very thick of our sins. He saves us in our disasters, not from them. He emphatically does not promise to meet only the odd winner of the self-improvement lottery: He meets us all in our endless and inescapable losing." C. S. Lewis
Thought you too would appreciate this from such a deep thinker and great writer. Hehhe...like someone else we know ;-). Just goes to show that trials and hardships seem to focus the heart and soul.
Praying for you and for the work of this website--Melody
Melody Bell
Baltimore, MD - Thursday, December 4, 2003 11:41 PM CST
Luke 10
The Parable of the Good Samaritan
On one occasion an expert in the law stood up to test Jesus. "Teacher," he asked, "what must I do to inherit eternal life?" "What is written in the Law?" he replied. "How do you read it?"
He answered: "'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind' ; and, 'Love your neighbor as yourself.'"
"You have answered correctly," Jesus replied. "Do this and you will live."
- Thursday, December 4, 2003 6:48 PM CST
Monica,
Thank you for the very moving meditation. It is interesting that Jesus' last hours are sometimes called His "Passion". He loved us so much, that He would even endure the most inhumane brutality for us.
Yes, I do run but have cut way back since Theresa has died. We'll talk running next time we get together :). I would also LOVE to show you Theresa's pictures from her last 13 minutes...they are beautiful but not everyone wants to see them. Thank you for asking, that means a lot to me.
God bless you!!!
Love,
Cathy & St. Theresa Rose <WeLoveTeesa@Mailstation.Com; www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose>
St. Paul, MN USA - Thursday, December 4, 2003 12:54 AM CST
Monica, I emailed you, but since I have had a chance to read your message I want to let you know that I will call you as well so you don't have to feel obligated to check the email. My favorite bible verse is Zechariah 4:6. When I say that, people look at me funny--people generally choose a Psalm or something from the New Testament. However, as one who LOVES to serve, He has also had to teach me how to do that in a way that is glorifying to Him. Serving Him will NEVER result in neglect of ourselves or our families. Severe Aplastic Anemia has been very much a blessing in that respect. If I start giving out of myself, my health goes downhill very quickly and I am forced to stop. From those experiences I have learned to distinguish God's strength from my strife and apply the scripture Zec. 4:6 in my heart. As I was teaching bible study last night, I stopped and had everyone share their favorite verses and tell why. I shared the one I just mentioned. "It's not by might, nor by power, but BY MY SPIRIT", says the Lord Almighty. Whenever my well runs dry, so to speak, I know I am trying to give out of my own strength rather than out of the overflow of His strength in my heart. This is why I keep saying to you "breathe in, breathe out, it will happen in God's timing". Service is meant to be a JOY, not a burden. It will happen BY HIS SPIRIT! We receive POWER when the Holy Spirit comes on us and we can then be His witnesses in Jerusalem, in Judea and Samaria and even to the ends of the Earth. Blessings and lots of love. I will call you soon.
Khalita My Caringbridge Site Duke Peds BMT Aplastic Anemia <khalita@hecaresonline.org >
Lexington, NC - Thursday, December 4, 2003 12:42 AM CST
Monica & family-
I have to apologize for not writing in here awhile, but my entire family has been sick with the flu and now I have been home from work all week with it. I'm feeling better today, so I was at home and thought I'd check out the website.
I'm sorry to hear about Noah. I must admit, it's a very scary time as both of my girls got RSV and one ended up being hospitalized for a week. Now, the docs had us buy a Nebulizer for at home, and that works wonders! It's just hard for those little ones to suck/eat and breathe at the same time when they are so stuffed and can't get it cleared on their own. Those nebs get it cleared up immediately, so we fed the girls right after that and eventually it got better. Our insurance paid for all but $20, so it was well worth it. Have you asked your doc about getting one for at home? Seriously, it has kept us out of the hospital for at least one occasion for sure so far. Well, that explanation got a little longer than what I thought!
Anyway, Monica, I just want to thank you again for keeping up the website and writing all of the inspirational things that you do. You truly are a gift and you have a special gift that God gave to you. I know Gabbie's life on earth was very short, but she sure lives on through you and has touched all of us out there in one way or another. She did have a special purpose on earth and through you, you have brought His word to so many of us and have brought so many closer to Him. Monica, Thank you.
Always in my thoughts and prayers. . .
Becky <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
MN USA - Thursday, December 4, 2003 9:49 AM CST
Monica,
You are a precious gift to all who know you. Please take care of yourself. I pray that the Lord will bring you peace in this holiday season. I sent you an e-mail last night with some important information. Please remember that I'm always here for you.
Love, Kathy
Kathy Welch
Lexington, Ohio USA - Thursday, December 4, 2003 8:20 AM CST
Monica,
The explanation of Jesus' whipping literally brought tears to my eyes. It makes a part of me feel very ill and my eyes well up with tears as I write this, to think that He went through all of that for me...and everyone else. There is no greater love that can ever be shown to anyone. Thank you for sharing that with us. Please slow down, don't stress out, you've been through too much already. At times when I was doing more than I should for others, I found that my family was being neglected. I am not saying that is the case with you, but I do believe that the Lord does want us to put our families first. Think it through carefully, and I am sure there are things you are doing that can be put aside or even given up. Take care of yourself.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Wednesday, December 3, 2003 9:53 PM CST
Monica,
A very thought-provoking entry today. Whenever I have felt overwhelmed or sad about things Lina has had to endure, I often got comfort thinking of Mary and what she must have felt about Jesus. Wishing you much peace -- as always -- but particularly as you "slow down" and decide on your biggest priorities.
Love,
Natalie Martin-Rak (www.caringbridge.com/fl/lina) <vladanat@comcast.net>
Jacksonville, fl - Wednesday, December 3, 2003 6:49 PM CST
It is good to slow down, to focus. So often we get caught up in "the doing" that life passes us by...and part of that focus is resting in Him...mmmmmm :^)! It is hard as a woman to slow down yet still attend to the important tasks, to find that perfect balance of all that is vying for our attention...I still haven't found it and I've been working at it a long time! I guess we really have to ask the Spirit to teach us what truly is important, and if other people tug at us for more time, to do what we can without taking on extra guilt.
I so often think the same thought as you about "Jesus on the cross"--it is what makes things bearable sometimes, knowing that He bore sooo much for me, that the horrible physical pain He bore was "easy" in comparison to what He went through in separation from the Father while my sins were on Him--and knowing that our future hope in glory is a bright reality.
"Take My yoke upon you, and learn from Me, for I AM gentle and humble of heart; and you shall find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy, and My load is light." Matt 11:29, 30
Thank you Jesus for Your words to us! May we truly believe them and be found humble of heart. Thank you Monica for your continued witness to His faithfulness. May we be found faithful before Him and the watching world. May all who are drawn to this website not leave until they are children of God, repentent of their sins, and wholly believing in the saving grace that Christ offers to them.
Love and hugs from another sister in Christ...
Melody Bell
Baltimore, MD - Wednesday, December 3, 2003 5:46 PM CST
As usual, so blessed by your entry. Thank you for your wise words and spiritual guidance. You always open our eyes to spiritual truths.
Keeping you in our thoughts and prayers. God bless you all now and always.
With Much Love in Him,
Your Friend/Sister in the Lord,
Yvonne
The Fernandez Family <yvonnengzs@rjia.net /// www.caringbridge.org/nc/leilani>
Mount Airy, - Wednesday, December 3, 2003 1:47 PM CST
Monica,
I am so sorry that people within your own family did not respect Gabbie or her death. I'm so sorry that you must feel the pain of missing Gabbie and longing for her. Thank you so much for sharing your faith so openly and honestly on Gabbie's web site. I'll be thinking of you and praying for you as Christmas approaches-- I can't begin to imagine how hard it must be for you and John.
With my Love in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Wednesday, December 3, 2003 10:53 AM CST
Monica,
I am so very sorry for the pain and hurt you have had to endure from the uncaringness of others, especially family members. I cannot even imagine how people can be that way, but I know it is true. I have found that those people that have had trials have empathy and depth, and those that haven't are usually ignorant and shallow. That may sound harsh, but that is how I have perceived it to be. God bless.
Debbie Nagy
- Tuesday, December 2, 2003 11:51 PM CST
Monica,
I love your quote to ponder. Very humbling and very true.(In my humble opinion) Thank you for sharing it.
I hope your "sick little Noah man" feels better soon.
There is so much "stuff"going around right now I just can't believe it. My daughter Jenny has had a fever on and off for a few days now, and a cold. I hope Daniel stays healthy, at least until after his scans and tretments next week in NY. It is very tough for him when he is feeling good.
Our good friend from MN,Carl Robinson, age 4 just relapsed from NB.I have thought of little else today and have been praying so much for him. I know you will say a pray for him, too.
Thank you for sharing so much with us in your journels. I truly feel the Holy Spirit in your words.
I know you know this, but I also think of Gabbie every single day and miss her so much for you. She is so dear and innocent and humble. And so precious. And so worthy of the promises of Christ. Far more than most. As are all these precious children who have gone to their true home so young.
God Bless You..every day and esp during these holidays.
I can't even imagine how difficult it is for you and John but I know it has to be tremendously hard..and I'm so sorry for that. More than my words can express.
Love Always,
Sara
www.caringbridge.com/mn/danielhammer <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Tuesday, December 2, 2003 11:40 PM CST
I hope you had a great Thanksgiving. We have much to be thankful for in spite of all the pain and saddness because we have Jesus and his promises. Thank you for reminding us to care for and about others more too.
I was thinking of the born again people you mentioned today who don't believe in the resurrection. A very good passage on that is in 1 Cor. 15:12-32. Jesus had many to address with that belief when he was on earth. The Sadducees didn't believe in resurrection even before Jesus death.(Matt.22:33).
Sorry to hear that Noah is sick and hope he is feeling good soon.
Suzanne
Gardner, KS USA - Tuesday, December 2, 2003 10:53 PM CST
Monica,
She left you 565 days ago. As I read that today it sort of hit me, that seems like such a long time ago. It is a long time ago, much too long to have to live without your beautiful Gabbie. I love the middle picture of her in the photo album. That little half smile is precious. Thank you for continuing to share your faith.
Love, Jen Buckentine <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Tuesday, December 2, 2003 8:50 PM CST
Monica,
I stumbled across your web page after getting the link from a guest book entry you made on someone else's page. What an amazing Christian faith you have and how honest you are! Reading your entries is like reading my own thoughts. I went way back to when you lost your precious Gabbie, and how touching to read these intimate thoughts. They are so much my own thoughts, and convictions.
Both my children have major medical problems, my daughter has a rare autoimmune disease that is attacking her systemically, she has mult-organ involvent, and my son is autistic. My daughter's disease is very rare, only 1 other child is known to have had this. So the drs are not sure how to treat her. We have gone all over the country to experts in these type diseases. AT best she will be on chemo for most of her life. What treatment has been done so far has no lasting effects. It appears there is no cure for her disease, and drs have told us that her system is so immunocompromised from the drugs and bad bacterial infections that if she contacts another serious infection they don't know if she can fight it.
Even though I have not lost my daughter, it is a constant fear. Reading your entries during all of this, are exactly my emotions. What a help and comfort to read how you have gotten through all this, and your concern for the souls of others is so evident in all you write. Just reading through is a revival to my soul. May God Bless you and comfort you during these holidays.
Cindy Smoot
Cindy Smoot <Cindy@dibimail.com>
Fate, TX USA - Tuesday, December 2, 2003 4:05 PM CST
Hi Monica,
Since I read from your update yesterday that you are bogged down with spam, you possibly have not gotten my e-mailthat I sent yesterday to update you on my husband. Just to let you know, my husband(Bob), is much better. Sorry to leave you hanging. Thanks so much for the prayers.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Tuesday, December 2, 2003 3:30 PM CST
Monica,
Feels like forever since I have visited!! I like what you said about the book of Revelation. Since I started actually studying the Bible and read thru Revelation a few times, I don't find it frightening at all. (There are other books of prophecy that I find a little disturbing though!). My old pastor said that the word "worship" was used more times in this book than any other in the Bible. What a totally different perspective! Of course, since the "worldly" view of the last book is one of gloom and doom, I think most people shy away from it. One case where ignorance is not really bliss! Anyway, I am rambling, it is late and I am tired! I love the ask, seek, knock.... for those out there that are in Bible Study Fellowship (BSF), it is an important component of the whole study. Praying earnestly for one another, seeking the Lord's will. I am so glad that He never stopped knocking on the door of my heart.... it took me so long to open it, but it just makes the knowledge of Him now that much more precious! To see that light bulb of illumination and understanding come on is a glorious thing!! Thanks for helping to light the way my friend.
Christy <calee59@wi.rr.com>
South Milwaukee, WI - Monday, December 1, 2003 11:04 PM CST
Monica,
As always, your entry inspires me to always strive to be the best I can be. Your statement 'Apathy does not change unless something rocks their world', blew me away. You are SOOOO right. My Mom and I have had that discussion about certain people "close" to us, and their dismissal of Connor's illness. My Mom has told me many times, "Unless something traumatic happens to them, they will never get past the self-centered mentality that they now possess." It is so sad, so sad, especially to think of Gabbie hearing things that were said. I'm so sorry, Monica. Just know that I will pray specifically for that. You are an amazing example of what God desires us all to be, Crusaders for Him. Take care....
Love and hugs,
Rhonda Hunley, Connor's Mommy
Connor's web page
**Hugs and Hope** Rhabdomyosarcoma relapse
<rshunley@comcast.net>
Hendersonville, TN
**God Bless the USA and our Leaders and Troops!** - Monday, December 1, 2003 8:49 PM CST
Monica and John,
I thought of you so much during this Thanksgiving holiday, as I'm sure many many many people did. Gabbie will always and forever be a part of our hearts and she will NEVER be forgotten. I hope you know that I miss her so dearly for you. She is so precious and so special.
Your note on grief today makes perfect sense to me.
It saddens me deeply to think of any disrespect towards you or Saint Gabbie.
Keep focusing on the people that truly care and are helping you in this grief journey and I will pray for the rest.
Also, I think it great to get your feeling out like you do.
I think that always helps us heal..That and prayer of course..
Love Always,
Sara
www.caringbridge.com/mn/danielhammer <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Monday, December 1, 2003 8:07 PM CST
I just wanted to take the time to say Thank You for sharing your Life and Journey and that of Gabbie's. I know you get your courage from the Book. It shows. I check the site regularly and am Thankfull that you continue to write. I always feel so bad after reading about children cause you are always left to wonder how the family is. But I respect their privacy and continue to say a prayer for them.
May God Continue to Bless You!!
Delana Moore <dmoore@dos.state.fl.us>
Crawfordville, Fl USA - Monday, December 1, 2003 12:25 AM CST
I am so thankful that I found Gabbie's site. It has been a blessing in my life.
Debbie Nagy
- Saturday, November 29, 2003 10:42 PM CST
Thanks be to God for the gift of Gabrielle! Although her life was short, we are eternally grateful for the gift she continues to be...
God bless you,
Nate,Cathy and St. Theresa, St. Isaiah <WeLoveTeesa@Mailstation.Com; www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose>
- Friday, November 28, 2003 2:38 PM CST
Hello! I came across your site through another site. I have to say I really admire what you're doing to keep Gabbie's memory alive. I think it's great that you can write how you feel whether it be your own words or verses from the Bible. I hope you and your family have a nice holiday season, I know it will be hard. I'm 25 and just had my 3rd baby, a little girl, on November 18th. I can't imagine what you and your family have gone through! I've searched your website to find the story of Gabbie saying "will you be dere?" and could not find it! Can u please share that story, if you can? Thank you and I wish your family healing and good memories.
Jenn Hartley <ronjenn696@prodigy.net>
Bensalem, PA USA - Friday, November 28, 2003 12:36 AM CST
Hope you have a blessed Thanksgiving. Thank you again for the book you sent to us. How thoughtful of you. As soon as my husband is done reading it, it will be my turn. I did read the first couple of pages and it affirms what I believe - instant heaven for our little girls. It is nice to see it in writing though and be able to pull out a book and affirm what you believe on those rough days. Thank you again. Your Gabbie is beautiful!
Laura, Ken, Nathan & ^^Angel Jillian^^ http://caringbridge.org/fl/jillian/
Naples, FL - Thursday, November 27, 2003 8:52 AM CST
One of the many things that I am thankful for, is your family and your friendship.
Michelle Espeseth <eaglet@cltcomm.net>
Clear Lake, WI - Thursday, November 27, 2003 8:34 AM CST
Thinking of you all on Thanksgiving. God bless.
Randy, Robin, Jake & Grace Boger <Robin.Boger@rbc.com>
Lewisville, NC - Thursday, November 27, 2003 7:20 AM CST
Dear Monica & John,
Wishing you a peace-filled Thanksgiving. As always, you along with many other Caringbridge families will be in my prayers. Too many little ones gone too soon, leaving empty spots in your hearts and lives. Wish I could take some of your pain away..... I'm counting my blessings that I have gotten to "know" many of you. God bless and keep you!
Christy <calee59@wi.rr.com>
South Milwaukee, WI - Wednesday, November 26, 2003 8:23 PM CST
Monica,
I just want to wish you all a nice Thanksgiving. I know it has to be so difficult to get through the holidays without Gabbie here with you. Just keep in mind that the day will come when you will be "dere" with her. You have lots of us out here praying for you all.
Love and hugs,
Rhonda, Connor's Mommy
Connor's page
<rshunley@comcast.net>
Hendersonville, TN God bless America! - Wednesday, November 26, 2003 2:54 PM CST
Dear Monica,
My heart is so heavy for you and John, every day, and esp
now during the holiday season. Please know we are all mourning Gabbie with you every day, and we also can't help but feel an additional sadness and emptyness during the holidays as well..For Gabbie and for all the precious babies we know who are Home in Heaven. But their parents are still here.
Keep focusing on Christ. As you know well know, He is the ONLY way!
God Bless you everyday and even some extra during the holidays, my friends.
You ARE in our thoughts and prayers..ALWAYS!
Love,
Sara
www.caringrbidge.com/mn/danielhammer <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Wednesday, November 26, 2003 11:50 AM CST
Monica,
Thanks for giving me some answers to the age of accountability question. I will check out Khalita's site to see what she has to say. I love both of you guys and I do want to help you with your He Cares project. I have e-mailed Khalita about helping(don't know if she told you). I haven't gotten back with her yet, my husband has been sick, and I had to take him to the emergency room tonight. He has streptecoccal(sp?) pneumonia. It came on quickly. Any prayers you can offer up for him will be greatly appreciated. God bless.
Love,
Debbie Nagy <nagyhome@earthlink.net>
St. Louis, MO - Wednesday, November 26, 2003 0:09 AM CST
Amen & Amen. BTW, sorry about putting this here, but my email has been weird. I answered you but it wasn't in my "sent mail" so I don't know if you actually got it and I don't want to mess with it again. 10 or 25 is fine with me. Reason I suggested 25 is 1) it's usually cheaper to buy more and 2) we would have the same quantities of everything. So, whichever is easier for you is fine. Let me know who you are doing and I will get started on some of the others. It goes without saying that I am 100 percent right behind you on the latest topics of discussion on your site. I think I'll tackle Debbie's "age of accountability" question in my next entry. Thank you for your boldness in Christ that just further encourages me in my quest to be bold despite the fact that I know it makes me GROSSLY unpopular at times. I love you lots. Happy Thanksgiving if we don't get in touch with each other before then.
Khalita My Caringbridge Site Duke Peds BMT Aplastic Anemia <khalita@hecaresonline.org>
Lexington, NC - Tuesday, November 25, 2003 5:24 PM CST
A word to 'unworthy parent' if I may. I think they have the right idea, that we can try and try and not make it because it has nothing to do with us and our 'goodness' but everything to do with the love of God and his son dying for our sins. We need to warn those who are 'trying' to turn to God to not try to work their way to Heaven.
Ephesians 2
8For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith--and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God-- 9not by works, so that no one can boast.
Without God and Jesus forgivness of sins we are all inadequate and no one is better than the other. After we find salvation we are all equal in God's eyes still. None of us know ALL but we can help others find the way, because we love and want to share the 'Good News'.
Thanks for reminding us, Monica.
Suzanne
Gardner, KS USA - Tuesday, November 25, 2003 4:56 PM CST
Don't mourn for me mommy.
I am still with you.
Even though I am in Heaven,
I am never far away.
From my cloud in Heaven,
where I have eternal rest,
I see you crying deep into the night.
I laughed and smiled when Noah was born,
Im a big sister now, just like my Aubrey.
And whenever you are saddest, I send you a butterfly,
to comfort you.
So although I am in Heaven, where I have eternal rest,
I am still with you everyday
As long as you keep me in your heart, Heaven isn't that far away.
A friend <prc7186@aol.com>
- Tuesday, November 25, 2003 8:28 AM CST
"Thou therefore endure hardness, as a good soldier of Jesus Christ." 2 Timothy 2:3
Feathers may sometimes be ruffled, but it is all done out of love in the Precious Name of Jesus Christ.
Press on, my friend.
God bless your efforts.
Your friend, Michelle <eaglet@cltcomm.net>
Clear Lake, WI - Tuesday, November 25, 2003 8:25 AM CST
Oh, and by the way Gabbie, I don't know if I ever left this message for you on your site or not, but I want you to know......I WILL BE 'DERE!
Debbie Nagy <nagyhome@earthlink.net>
St. Louis, MO - Monday, November 24, 2003 9:17 PM CST
Monica,
It was kind of you to respond with MORE truth, but you did not need to explain yourself. Everything you spoke of in your previous journal entry was the Truth. That Truth coming straight from His Word(the Bible). He is all-knowing, and nothing you have ever stated said that you claimed to be so. You are not passing judgement, but I do believe judgement has been passed on you. Your comment about believers/un-believers was not made to make people feel inadequate, but out of concern for the lost. I feel that you were in a concerned way trying to plant the seed of "there is more to eternity than just saying the words". It is not just a head statement, it HAS to be a heart connected to the head belief. There must be faith, belief and a relationship with the Savior, and I feel you gently suggested to others not to feel secure in going home to the Lord, just because a young child does. God expects more of us, than He does of a baby or child. There is an age of accountability, although I must admit I do not know what scripture claims that to be...is it an actual age or a mental maturity? Maybe you or Khalita can answer that for me. I consider Gabbie and Khalita's site the most theologically sound sites in presenting the Word to those visiting these Caringbridge sites. There are possibly others out there that I just haven't visited. You have NEVER come off as a know-it-all Christian. I find you to be a loving, gentle, caring Christian with a tremendous burden for the lost. Even though I have never met you, I have grown to love your precious Gabbie and you through your journals and this site. May God continue to lead you in all you do for Him. God bless always.
In His love,
Debbie Nagy <nagyhome@earthlink.net>
St. Louis, MO - Monday, November 24, 2003 9:14 PM CST
One believer to another...thank you for ruffling those feathers; at least you got them thinking! ;) God is good; ALL the time!
jan livingstone (Andy's Mom forever)
- Monday, November 24, 2003 8:21 PM CST
Monica! I've just had a revelation!! I always pray for you, as you speak the Word, for your strength and clarity. My revelation is this...I need to ALSO pray for the folks that come to this site...that their hearts would be fertile soil for the seeds of the gospel to take root!! OH, LORD...thank you for continuing to teach me to pray!!
To God be all glory!
Suz
Susan King <suznk_01@yahoo.com>
Phoeinx, AZ USA - Monday, November 24, 2003 8:02 PM CST
Amen and amen! Praise Him for His grace shown to us...may we approach the altar of Jesus Christ daily with our inadequacies and fill ourselves with His forgiveness, mercy, and love so that it may spill over to those around us. May we remember that the hope we have is from Him alone and not in one thing that we do other than repent and believe as He has said...and even there, we pray as the saints of old, "Lord, give me the faith that I may believe!"
Melody Bell
Baltimore, - Monday, November 24, 2003 6:35 PM CST
Dear Monica,
I didn't see any need for you to have to defend yourself.
I know you are not angry but I admit I am a little. I read and reread and re read your journels and there is nothing that strikes me that way about you..AT ALL. In fact, quite the opposite. You are certainly not a judgemental person.
I think the only passing of judgement was done TO you.
And that was so decent of you to explain yourself anyway..something that I personally think you shouldn't have to do!
But that is so like you though.. caring.
Keep on spreading God's Word so beautifully.
Love You.
A Friend
A friend <afriend@yahoo.com>
- Monday, November 24, 2003 6:34 PM CST
Monica,
Amen to what you wrote today. I know your heart is with trying to help people understand there is only one way to Heaven through Our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. I don't just hope that's true-- I know from the promises of God that it IS true!! I'll see your precious Gabbie in Heaven and if I get there before you do rest assured I will tell Gabbie how much you love and miss her and how you're spreading the gospel in her honor and memory!
Hope your Thanksgiving is as good as can be.
My Love and Thanks,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@Insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Monday, November 24, 2003 6:15 PM CST
"Jesus wept." John 11:35
Monica,
Thank you for your courageous evangelization. May all of our hearts be humbled and our eyes open to the graces that God wants to shower upon us...especially through the gift of His son Jesus. You're in our prayers!
Cathy and St. Theresa, St. Isaiah <WeLoveTeesa@Mailstation.com; www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose>
St. Paul, MN USA - Monday, November 24, 2003 1:55 PM CST
Monica,
Looks like you ruffled some feathers....guess it goes with the territory. I'm sure most of us that visit Gabbie's site see what you are trying to do. Not pass judgment, but educate to what it really takes to get to heaven. Too many people have never studied scripture and don't understand that our children will never become angels, they aren't butterflies and they do not plan or guide our lives after they pass on. They also don't understand that the only way they will be reunited is if they have made that confession of faith in Jesus. We can't just wish ourselves there and I know you are desperately trying to get that message across. Not because of a sense of spiritual superiority or "holier than thou" attitude, but because you know that the only thing worse than losing a child, would be losing that relationship for an eternity. Don't get discouraged, sometimes the message is just too hard for many to accept, but that doesn't change the fact that it's the truth. I know that the parent who feels unworthy or is struggling is just the kind of person you are trying to reach. I pray they won't stop searching until the find the WAY, the ONLY way. God Bless....
And let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart. Galatians 6:9
Christy <calee59@wi.rr.com>
South Milwaukee, WI - Sunday, November 23, 2003 10:21 PM CST
You sometimes seem so ALL knowing. Your last comment about believers/non-believers may make many people seem inadequate. So who knows precisely what God has to offer those who try and try but haven't yet ascended to your level of know all Christianity? God knows all - please help us all with your wisdom and guidance without passing judgment.
unworthy parent <tryingtobelievethroughhardship@aol.com>
mpls, mn - Sunday, November 23, 2003 9:46 PM CST
Hi Monica and family,
We're all settled in Phoenix...again. It's really nice here this time of year.
What a tough week that opens a tough season for you and so many families that have lost loved ones and especially those who have lost children. You're always in my prayers and I'm so proud to know you.
Big hugs,
Suz
Suz King <suznk_01@yahoo.com>
Phoenix, AZ USA - Saturday, November 22, 2003 10:33 PM CST
I love you Monica. When you get a chance, read my entry from October 29, 2002. Praise be to the God of all comfort! Talk to you soon. I haven't been able to access my hecaresonline email addy today for some reason. I'll keep trying but if you need me immediately please call my cell or email my yahoo or duke account ok? Blessings...
Khalita My Caringbridge Site Duke Peds BMT Aplastic Anemia <khalita@hecaresonline.org>
Lexington, NC - Friday, November 21, 2003 6:00 PM CST
Happy Birthday Gabbie. I remembered but our computer system was down on Monday.
You are in our thoughts and prayers.
Jennifer yseth <j.yseth@mchsi.com>
Brookings, SD 57006 - Friday, November 21, 2003 11:17 AM CST
Dear Monica,
I certainly can understand why you would want to fast forward to January. I am sure the holidays will create many emotions for you and John. I will continue to pray for both of you in the month ahead.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Thursday, November 20, 2003 7:43 PM CST
Hi Monica,
I just wanted to say that your short sentence on grief was so powerful. I can't imagine how much more difficult this time of year is for you and for all families who have lost a child. I hope that everyone is respectful of that.
One other thing I wanted to say is that I commend you for writing a note of disappointment to Target for the French Connection marketing.
I was also speechless yesterday when I heard about the Abercrombie and Fitch catalog, with the extreme nudity and sexual portrayals. Apparently they sell them in the store but you have to be 18 to purchase. More garbage that adds no benefit to society, in my humble opinion. They are such a successful store and
certainly do not need to go to these extremes to sell their merchandise. Same for Target.
I'm get off my soap box now!
Love and Prayers,
Sara
Sara Hammer <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Thursday, November 20, 2003 5:36 PM CST
Words canot express how saddened I am for your loss. I read the entries and realize how loved your daughter is. My daughter, Juliett, was diagnosed with Neuroblastoma in June of 2003. Like Gabbie, she is an angel. I pray for you. I pray for everyone who suffers the pain of having a sick child. Words cannot express enough. I know that God will look over your daughter and your family. Gabbie is so beautiful in those pictures. I will always remember her face. If you would like to see Juliett's page, please visit:
http://www.caringbridge.org/la/juliett/
Take care and may God bless you.
Jeff
Jeff Johnston <kricks2013@aol.com>
St. Bernard, LA, LA USA - Thursday, November 20, 2003 12:26 AM CST
Monica,
I too feel that the card / stamp resembles Saint Gabbie as well..in looks and in spirit..that solemn expression.
What a fitting name for it.."Precious".
Gabbie IS so very precious..to me and to so many people!
I am also hurt by the thoughtless comment from Rosie about cancer. There is nothing further from the truth, and esp with childhood cancer. As a mom of a truthful, wonderful and innocent little boy battling cancer, it is bothersome to hear that.
Thanks for visiting Daniel's site and keeping him in your prayers as well. I truly cannot imagine how difficult
it has to be to read about other children battling the same cancer that took your beautiful Gabbie. It would be so painful for me.
Thank you..
Love and prayers always,
Sara
I keep meaning to thank you for introducing me to Charles Spurgeon.
He and St Gabbie are very wise indeed!
Thank you for sharing!
Sara Hammer <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Wednesday, November 19, 2003 11:56 PM CST
Monica,
Wow - the card is beautiful. It really does resemble Gabbie. I thought it was of her at first. Your heart must jump every time you discover a new version of that stamp. Thinking of you...
Love, Jen Buckentine <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Wednesday, November 19, 2003 8:23 PM CST
Unfortunately I was home bound after another surgery on Gabbie's birthday and did not get to enter on that date. I do not have the internet at home. All of you were on my mind that day. I know the day was probably very bitter sweet for you. We continue to keep Gabbie in our prayers.
Rhonda Meyer <rschultz@scl.doc.state.mn.us>
- Wednesday, November 19, 2003 11:12 AM CST
Dear Monica,
Thank you for sharing your feelings. I come here often to get inspired. I am sorry that you cannot hold Gabbie in your arms for her birthday.
Kristy Sigman <kristy@wt.net>
Houston, Tx - Tuesday, November 18, 2003 10:03 PM CST
Dear Monica,
I was thinking of you and Gabbie yesterday; on Gabbie's birthday. As you know I am opening a restaurant out of town. Yesterday a little boy came into the restaurant to celebrate his birthday. It was my opportunity to do something nice in Gabbie's memory. I made him feel very special and he left with the biggest smile. He said it was the best birthday ever.
My thoughts and prayers are with you.
Andrea
- Tuesday, November 18, 2003 9:23 PM CST
Monica & John,
I got home too late last night from my Bible study to log on and let you know that I was thinking of you. But as I was driving north out of Chicago, the thought crossed my mind that "today is Gabbie's birthday". There are so many wonderful children I have never met that I will one day hug in heaven. I too, will "be dere" Gabbie! Happy birthday sweetheart!
Christy <calee59@wi.rr.com>
South Milwaukee, WI - Tuesday, November 18, 2003 7:35 PM CST
Thinking of you today as always, I hope you had a nice day yesterday honoring your sweet daughters birthday. God bless you.
Sending lots of (((hugs)))
sally <sally_torres@lusknet.com>
- Tuesday, November 18, 2003 5:27 PM CST
I just returned from preschool with my 3 year old son. A girl in the class was wearing a birthday crown. I asked if today was her birthday, she said, "No, it was yesterday. I turned 4 on November 17th." Did her Mom notice how tightly I hugged her? Could she tell that while I wished her a very happy birthday that I was thinking of someone else? Why do I long to hug a little girl named Gabbie whom I've never met? Its because she has taught me so much and I want to thank her and tell her I love her. I miss you Gabbie.
Mary Akagi <b.akagi@worldnet.att.net>
Maple Grove, MN - Tuesday, November 18, 2003 12:24 AM CST
Monica,
Hi. I just wanted to let you know that I have been thinking of you today. Happy Birthday, Gabbie.
God bless,
Dana
Dana Maeda <bmaeda@unique-software.com>
Inver Grove Heights, MN USA - Monday, November 17, 2003 9:37 PM CST
Dear Monica and family,
I know today is a difficult day for you and I have prayed for you off and on all day. As I wrote a check this afternoon at the grocery store, I dated it Nov 17, and thought immediately, it's GABBIE'S birthday. How can this precious little girl that I never got to know until after she went home to be with Jesus have touched my life so much? I personally believe through the Holy Spirit, and that Holy Spirit is in you Monica. Thank you for sharing her with so many and may you find comfort on this day, knowing that you are keeping Gabbie alive in many people's hearts. HAPPY BIRTHDAY GABBIE!!
In His love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Monday, November 17, 2003 9:20 PM CST
I was just thinking about Gabbies Birthday....her first one in Heaven.....knowing that it will be a very happy birthday
being with Jesus...Also thinking about her family on earth..
Missing her...You have been in our thoughts today.Take care.
Bob and Nancy Hotzfeld <nancy.hotzfeld@verizon.com>
Merrill, WI USA - Monday, November 17, 2003 9:10 PM CST
Happy birthday to a little girl I never met who changed my life forever.
Michael <nel23@yahoo.com>
- Monday, November 17, 2003 8:23 PM CST
Thinking of you all today- With love and many prayers.
Deb <DV-MEYER@MSN.COM>
- Monday, November 17, 2003 6:46 PM CST
To realize that Gabrielle and Charles Spurgeon and precious Luke Ervin are celebrating together in joyous worship before the throne of the Most High! May the knowledge that Gabbie realized the Truth that you work so hard to bring others to bring some peace on this very special day. Love to all, Kathy
Kathy Welch
Lexington, Ohio USA - Monday, November 17, 2003 6:17 PM CST
Just wanted you to know that you continue to remain very much in my thoughts and prayers. I know today is hard for you. I will be lifting you up more during this time. Blessings and lots of love to you in Christ.
Khalita My Caringbridge Site Duke Peds BMT Aplastic Anemia <khalita@hecaresonline.org>
Lexington, NC - Monday, November 17, 2003 5:10 PM CST
Thinking of all of you on this special day. Happy 4th Birthday Gabbie.
Shannon Hujanen <hujanenfamily@mcleodusa.net>
Blaine, MN USA - Monday, November 17, 2003 4:48 PM CST
I'm thinking of you especially today and praying for you on this day of remembrance. I can't say Happy Birthday to Gabbie as she is not living in 'years' now but in a place with no aging! I can't wait but I also know that today is a day of missing her. I'm glad you know you'll see her again and have eternity together. That's our blessed hope.
Suzanne
Gardner, KS USA - Monday, November 17, 2003 4:14 PM CST
St. Gabbie's family,
You all have been in our hearts in a special way this past week...God bless you as you have another birthday w/o Gabbie's physical presence. Oh how we all miss her (and I never even met her!!!), but especially you all miss her so much more. We offered our Mass and rosary for you today, may some of Jesus' comfort bring you peace. We're so sad and are holding you close in our hearts. Much love,
Cathy, Nate and St. Theresa, St. Isaiah <WeLoveTeesa@Mailstation.Com; www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose>
St. Paul, MN USA - Monday, November 17, 2003 1:17 PM CST
Happy Birthday Gabbie! Thinking of you today on your fourth birthday. Also thinking of and praying for your mommy, daddy, sister and brother as I know they are missing you so very much, especially on this day!
Bridget <bridgetherman1@comcast.net>
- Monday, November 17, 2003 12:45 AM CST
Gabbie - sweet, precious, solemn and wise. I woke up this morning thinking of you - the day is dreary and it reminds me of your momma and dadda's life here w/out you here on Earth w/ them. I know you are in Heaven singing glorious songs of praise every day, but we miss you - even those of us who were not fortunate enough to meet you. I love you and am holding your family close in thought and prayer today and every day.
Mari Beth Ross <maribeth.ross@nrgenergy.com>
Hugo, MN - Monday, November 17, 2003 12:42 AM CST
Monica and family-
I am thinking about you as always today, but more so because it's Gabbie's birthday. Even though Gabbie is not here with you today, Her big Blue eyes and soft curls just bring a smile to my eyes. She is a very special little girl. She has changed so many lives in the short time she was here. She will always be in my heart.
Always in my thoughts and prayers. . .
Becky <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
MN USA - Monday, November 17, 2003 12:41 AM CST
Monica, Thinking of you on this difficult day.
Kathie <kathie12@sympatico.ca>
Canada - Monday, November 17, 2003 12:03 AM CST
Precious Gabbie, remembering and loving you today and always. We miss you. Tom, Kari, Joe, Elli, and Nick Totall
Kari Totall <tkjentotall@aol.com>
Eden Prairie, Mn - Monday, November 17, 2003 11:52 AM CST
Happy Birthday sweet Gabrielle we love you so much you have become a very special person in my heart and hope to meet you some day in heaven. I send you lots of hugs and kisses today.
Monica and family I will pray for you to have nothing but sweet memories today for your precouis baby I know it will be a hard day missing her and not having her here on her birthday . It makes me so glad that you know withought a doubt you'll get to see her again, and that she is safe with our heavenly father waiting for you. God bless you
sally <sally_torres@lusknet.com>
anaheim, - Monday, November 17, 2003 11:29 AM CST
Monica and John: Gabbie is and will always be in our thoughts, and especially today.
Love, Mom and Dad
Jerry Totall
Bloomington, MN - Monday, November 17, 2003 10:17 AM CST
Monica and John: Gabbie is and will always in our thoughts, and especially today.
Love, Mom and Dad
Jerry Totall
Bloomington, MN - Monday, November 17, 2003 10:15 AM CST
Dear Paquette Faimly,
Please know that I am sending prayers to heaven today for Gabbie. Happy Earth Birthday Gabbie! May the memory of Gabbie's birth, life and passing from earth to heaven continue to inspire all of us to seek the Good News of our Lord. I pray that God continues to keep you in His Grace.
Sending Love and Peace for this special day.
Cathy (Kaitlyn's mommy)
Catherine <seckfourangelone.mcnpk@verizon.net>
Upland, CA USA - Monday, November 17, 2003 10:11 AM CST
Monica, John, Aubrey and Noah,
May God fill your aching hearts with peace on this special day. It is amazing how many lives Gabbie continues to reach from her Heavenly home. Her short, but oh so profound question will forever echo in my mind as well, "Will you be dere?" Well put, Gabbie!
Love, hugs and prayers,
Rhonda Hunley, Connor's Mommy
Connor's web page
**Hugs and Hope** Rhabdomyosarcoma relapse
<rshunley@comcast.net>
Hendersonville, TN **God Bless the USA!** - Monday, November 17, 2003 10:06 AM CST
Monica, John, Aubrey and Noah,
Thinking of you lots today on Gabbie's 4th birthday and lifting you all up to God in prayer. I'm sure the pain is immense. Remembering those beautiful, solemn eyes.
Love, Jen and Bill Buckentine
Jen Buckentine <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Monday, November 17, 2003 9:59 AM CST
HAPPY 4TH BIRTHDAY GABBIE! ~ Thinking of you John, Monica,
Aubrey, Noah and especially Gabbie on this very, very special day.
Jill <jill.d.williams@healthpartners.com>
- Monday, November 17, 2003 9:33 AM CST
Happy Birthday Gabbie!
I can't even begin to imagine how you are feeling today, Monica, John, Aubrey and Noah, but I am thinking of you.
Take care!
Hugs,
Susan
Susan Bernhardt
Zimmerman, MN - Monday, November 17, 2003 8:48 AM CST
Thinking of you all today, on the occasion of sweet Gabbie's 4th birthday.
Philippians 1:20 - According to my earnest expectation and my hope that in nothing I shall be ashamed, but that with all boldness, as always, so now also Christ shall be magnified in my body, whether it be by life, or by death."
I live to die
My God to glorify
I live to die
His name to magnify
I live to die
My self-willed ways deny
I live to die
My deeds I mortify
Now Death
Is swallowed up in Victory
This mortal
Shall put on immortality
Praise God
Who swore by His own immutability
The Anchor
To my soul for all eternity
I live
Because the Holy Ghost abides
I live
Because the King in me resides
No more
Am I tossed by life's angry, foamy tide
I live
Because the Lamb of God in my stead died
I live
Because His life He gave
And now
By His faith alone ....
I live!
Jacinta F Hewitt ©© 2002
The family of Jackson Espeseth
Clear Lake, WI - Monday, November 17, 2003 8:46 AM CST
Happy Birthday Gabbie!
Jennifer Miles www.caringbridge.org/mn/deemartinson <jennifer.miles@thomson.com>
Minneapolis, MN USA - Monday, November 17, 2003 8:35 AM CST
HAPPY BIRTHDAY SWEET GABBIE~
You are loved so very much and have touched so many lives here on Earth...
I will light a candle in your memory today!
John, Monica~
THINKING OF YOU TODAY !
Lots of Angel hugs to you all~
With Love
Chemo Angel Sheryl
Sheryl Gunzenhauser <mik181@mchsi.com>
Winnebago, Mn - Monday, November 17, 2003 8:34 AM CST
Happy Birthday, Gabbie!!
I look forward to the day that I will be dere and you and I will finally meet.
Sending angel hugs up to you in Heaven and to your family here on Earth.
Forever His,
Chemo Angel Kelly
Kelly Christoferson <kelly9672@yahoo.com>
Otsego, MN USA!!! - Monday, November 17, 2003 8:22 AM CST
Dear Monica and family, I have no words. Just know that you are in our prayers everday, but especially today on Gabrielle's fourth birthday. God bless.
Randy, Robin, Jake & Grace Boger <Robin.Boger@rbc.com>
Lewisville, NC - Monday, November 17, 2003 8:02 AM CST
Happy birthday Gabbie! I wish I were "dere" celebrating with you -- what a celebration it must be! Monica, John & Family -- you are very much in my thoughts and prayers today. I hold you in my heart as we await that glad reunion day. (1 Thessalonians 4:13-18)
Kim Rutherford
Knoxville, TN USA - Monday, November 17, 2003 7:31 AM CST
To the Paquette family,
My family's prayers are with you today and always. I hope that God's presence comforts you all during this difficult time.
Craig Levine <wakbyfaith@yahoo.com>
Pawnee, IL - Monday, November 17, 2003 7:25 AM CST
Monica, John, Aubrey and Noah,
I will walk through this day with all of you in my thoughts and Gabbie in my heart. You were my first thought when my eyes opened this morning. May God bless you with a very peaceful and gentle day.
Mary Akagi <b.akagi@worldnet.att.net>
Maple Grove, MN - Monday, November 17, 2003 7:11 AM CST
Monica, John, Aubrey and Noah: I just read your journal entry for today. I have been thinking of all of you and praying for you. You mentioned that "the veil is too thick", and it reminded me of the verse that says "Neither life nor death. . . shall separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus". When my dad died a long time ago, my mom used to talk to me about that verse a lot, and she always said that it is a very thin veil that separates us from our loved ones who have died in Christ Jesus. I firmly believe that, and I hope that gives you some comfort as you think of your dear little Gabbie on her birthday.
Love from,
Cynthia
Cynthia Cook
- Sunday, November 16, 2003 5:24 PM CST
John and Monica, I just don't know what to say. I have been thinking lots of what it will be like when we can no longer celebrate our Sarah's birthday with her. I am so very sorry that your Gabrielle will miss celebrating her 4th birthday with you. She will instead celebrate being in the arms of her Saviour. I hope this makes sense, I am not much of a writer.
Kathie <kathie12@sympatico.ca>
Canada - Sunday, November 16, 2003 5:15 PM CST
Here I am Monica. We just had our Thanksgiving Dinner at church and here I am with tears running down my face as I listen to the radio play "I'll Rise Again". Oh, I do not cry for our precious girls gone Home before. They are shed because of our homesickness. I know, however, that our Lord allows and uses life's circumstances for His purpose and I am so grateful that He has chosen us as vessels to extend His compassion, His comfort, His peace and assurance in salvation to others who bear this most painful and heaviest of burdens. "O GIVE thanks unto the Lord; for he is good; for his mercy endureth for ever." (Psalm 136:1) As always, my sister, you are in my prayers and will continue to be until we meet in His holy, glorious presence. Yeah, I'll be dere too!
Yolanda Rogers, Mom to Anna, http://www.galatians5.com - <galatians5@truevine.net>
Altamonte Springs, FL USA - Sunday, November 16, 2003 3:58 PM CST
We love Gabbie and think of her and you guys several times each day.
We are so very sorry, beyond words, for you that she is not physically here with you..as you try to life your life every day..without her. It breaks my heart more than I can say.
Monica, I also can understand you not wanting to visit her grave. She is not there. It makes so much sense to me.
Thinking of you and praying for you on Gabbie's 4th birthday and ALWAYS..and missing her with you.
With Love,
Sara
www.caringbridge.com/mn/danielhammer <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Sunday, November 16, 2003 2:46 PM CST
I am so very, very moved by your entry today. And so very, very sorry Gabbie isn't here with you.
Thank you for continuing to share.
Love,
Natalie Martin-Rak (www.caringbridge.com/fl/lina) <vladanat@comcast.net>
Jacksonville, FL - Sunday, November 16, 2003 1:22 PM CST
Dear Precious Monica,
I will be thinking about you and praying for you extra hard on Monday. I'm so sorry for you and John's loss and for all that your precious Gabbie endured during her illness.
My love in Christ to you both, and Yes Gabbie I will be Dere!!
Heather (I'll hug you big time in Heaven sweet Gabbie!!)
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Saturday, November 15, 2003 11:00 PM CST
Monica,
Thinking and praying for you and the rest of your family this weekend. May God surround you with much love and peace.
Christy
South Milwaukee, WI - Friday, November 14, 2003 10:09 PM CST
Hi Paquette family;
We will be thinking of you on Monday. When I am really sad and lonely I visit your site for some uplifting words...God's Word...thank you for just being here...We will all be "dere" someday!!!!
The Lee family www.kylelee28.com <milf31@hotmail.com>
Rancho Cucamonga, CA USA - Friday, November 14, 2003 5:52 PM CST
Always thinking and praying for your family.
Love Amy*
Amy’s Fight
Amy Mareck <brownhair25@hotmail.com>
- Friday, November 14, 2003 4:49 PM CST
Just wanted to add my sympathy to the loss of your precious daughter. I came here through the Smile Quilts website, which is a website for critically ill children. Thank you for continuing to live in this world and to help others even though you, yourself, are hurting.
God bless
Shawn
Shawn Norris <shawnnorris@webtv.net>
Carthage, Tx US - Friday, November 14, 2003 3:43 PM CST
Hi Paquettes!
Wonderful, wonderful entry today, Monica. The Word is true and we are strangers in this world. But, guess what?? We're going home! I can understand why all the old hymns sang so much about longing for heaven. I long for it, also.
We got news this week that we are to be in Phoenix next Tuesday, so we'll be leaving Fresno on Saturday. Phoenix is a wonderful place to spend the winter, so it will be nice to be there again. We shouldn't have any problem getting an internet connection once we get settled in, so I'll be checking in as soon as I can.
You guys take care! You're always in my prayers!
Big hugs,
Suz
Susan King <suznk_01@yahoo.com>
Fresno, soon to be Phoenix, CA USA - Friday, November 14, 2003 0:11 AM CST
Monica, I didn't forget you. This was "clinic week" for me. I'll have us caught up by Monday. I love you and am keeping you and the mission in prayer as I rest and recharge. Just keep working on the list in the meantime if you have time and we'll get it all going soon ok? HUGS!
Khalita My Caringbridge Site Duke Peds BMT Aplastic Anemia <khalita@hecaresonline.org>
Lexington, NC - Thursday, November 13, 2003 7:26 PM CST
Dear Monica, Thank you for continuing to care for all of us. I WILL be dere, for Gabbie, for you, for me and for my children. My thoughts are seldom not with you, I will never be the same since seeing you on television. You have made a profound impact on my life and the way I choose to live it. Thank you. And P.S. It has been 11 years since my father died, I have yet to visit the grave.
Mary Akagi <b.akagi@worldnet.att.net>
Maple Grove, MN USA - Thursday, November 13, 2003 6:54 PM CST
Monica & family-
Sorry it's been so long since I last wrote. I have had time to check your site daily, but sometimes don't have time at work to write in here.
Thank you for all of your updates! Monica, you help us "readers" out so much by writing your feelings and spreading His word. I think you have inspired more people that you may even realize. You are a very special person and you have a special family. Thanks again for all you do!
I will be praying extra hard for you with Gabbie's birthday coming up.
Always in my thoughts and prayers. . .
Becky <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
MN USA - Thursday, November 13, 2003 3:59 PM CST
St. Gabbie's momma:
Monica, we are praying for you EVERY day in more fervence leading up to St. Gabbie's birthday. I'm looking forward to seeing you Friday! God bless you!
Cathy and St. Theresa <WeLoveTeesa@Mailstation.Com; www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose>
St. Paul, MN - Thursday, November 13, 2003 1:13 PM CST
Dear Monica,
I just got an opportunity to get on line. I wanted to let you know I am checking in with you and I am thinking about you and Gabbie. I will do something special in memory of Gabbie on Monday.
Love,
Andrea
Andrea Rasmus
- Thursday, November 13, 2003 0:19 AM CST
Just as Aubrey has faith you will catch her, we as Christians have faith that God has a plan for each of us and that there is more beyond this Earthly life - that there is a Heaven where one day we will be reunited with those we loved and lost that knew Jesus Christ. I love you and think of you as the days approach what would have been Gabbie's 4th birthday.
Mari Beth Ross <maribeth.ross@nrgenergy.com>
Hugo, MN - Wednesday, November 12, 2003 10:33 PM CST
Monica,
Praise God for His provision for your mission, which is so dear to your heart. I'm sure that the families you are reaching out to do will be so glad to receive the package. I'm so sorry as always for the loss of your precious Gabbie.
My love to you in Christ,
Heather (Anxiously awaiting our meeting in Heaven!!!)
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@Insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Wednesday, November 12, 2003 4:38 PM CST
Monica,
I wish I knew how you do it, you always find the right things to say and at just the right time. I just went back to work last week after a 6 year absence and I am finding it HARD to just stay on top of everything! It is nice to come to Gabbie's site and find truth every day!! I have to agree with you on the Target issue, my brother had done some research about some of the "causes" that Target supports and he also came to the conclusion that they have an agenda that isn't exactly conservative. I agree that it is so easy for us to become complacent. I have to struggle to be vigilant about what my kids are exposed to and I've been told on several occasions that I "shelter" my kids too much. Like they won't be out in the world on their own soon enough!! It takes courage to go against the current, but I along with so many others applaud you for doing just that. It's great news about your new endeavor with Kahlita, what can I do to support you?? Until later, I'm going to bed!!
Christy <calee59@wi.rr.com>
S. Milwaukee, WI - Tuesday, November 11, 2003 8:09 PM CST
Please take a look at Gabrielle's Memorial Quilt by clicking the above graphic and then on to the Memorials Page where you'll find Gabrielle's name. I hope my efforts were well suited for Gabrielle. She was a lovely girl who will always be a sainted in many hearts and minds.
Warm Hugs,
Gloria (Smile Quilts) <SimplicityMD@comcast.net>
Owings Mills, Md USA - Tuesday, November 11, 2003 5:13 PM CST
Monica,
Your words absolutely ARE so eloquent and powerful. I also know they are inspired by the Holy Spirit in your heart and soul.
a reader <kcck24@aol.com>
- Tuesday, November 11, 2003 3:57 PM CST
Monica, I don't think there is ANY mother whose child has died who wouldn't prefer losing a house instead!! We would ALL choose to have our children here with us. Material possessions can NEVER compare!
but I do understand what you meant when you wrote that.
love & prayers from
another mom in mourning <cygnet58@aol.com>
- Tuesday, November 11, 2003 11:58 AM CST
Monica, it is obvious the Lord speaks through you, as your words are so eloquent yet powerful.
"and then I would have danced in the smoldering ashes of my home in ultimate joy"
These words continue to haunt and speak to me even though I read them days ago.
Most of us truly have no idea what "loss" really is...
Amy Grein
- Tuesday, November 11, 2003 8:31 AM CST
Hi Monica,
Thank you for sharing you lives with us. I too was blessed by this man who has Cerebral Palsy. Nine years ago my husband was struggling to break free from Alcoholism and I was struggling just to make it through the days at West. My husband has been sober for almost nine years now. PTL! This mail service person was part of the reason that my husband and I were able to pull through such a trying time in our lives. This man is a recovered alcoholic and has been sober for more than 26 years now. It never ceases to amaze me how God puts someone in your life exactly when you need it.
God Bless you.
Deuteronomy 31:6
Shannon <cobbcorn@comcast.net>
Inver Grove Heights, MN USA - Tuesday, November 11, 2003 7:50 AM CST
Hi Monica;
I loved your message yesterday....some of my neighbors are so ignorant, they are still complaining about these fires...i'm like, "it's over , get over it!!!" I too would dance joyful dances on top of my burned house if Kyle's life was spared...sometimes it offends me when my own neighbors worry about little things, they can't bring their million dollar homes to heaven, that's for sure!!!
I agree with you about Target...Thanks for bringing that to our attention...God bless you and your wonderful family!!!
aileen <milf31@hotmail.com>
Rancho cucamonga, CA - Monday, November 10, 2003 10:24 PM CST
Monica,
Shame on Target. I have always considered them to be a family friendly store. It is a shame. That certainly adds no good value at all to our world.
Thank you for bringing this to our attention. I had no idea.
Media can be such an evil force.
"What shocks us today is commonly accepted tomorrow"
VERY true.
The story of the kind man at West touched my heart. Thank you for sharing that. What a beautiful heart he has.
God Bless him.
Sara
www.caringbridge.com/mn/danielhammer <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Monday, November 10, 2003 9:44 PM CST
Monica,
The incident with the mail guy at West touches me. It is amazing to me how someone comes to us out of the blue like that and speaks with love and concern. Makes me wish that everyone were that way...the Target thing is pathetic. I love Target merchandise and that is a very disappointing move on their part. Wasn't there another chain that was in on that too? Was that Marshall Fields. I am not sure if they are still connected like they were with the Dayton-Hudson corp. Talk to you soon.
Michelle E. <eaglet@cltcomm.net>
Clear Lake, WI - Monday, November 10, 2003 6:20 PM CST
Monica,
I'm praying for you today! I love looking at beautiful Gabbie's picture everyday (the one in her yellow outfit w/flowers)...she is such a little cutie pie.
I thank God for the short time that he lent you Gabbie! He sure picked special parents :)!
Cathy and St. Theresa Rose <WeLoveTeesa@Mailstation.Com; www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose>
St. Paul, MN USA - Monday, November 10, 2003 4:27 PM CST
I stopped by through Luke Ervin's website. What a beautiful little girl. I share Gabbie's birthday. (although I will be 31) I will be thinking of you especially on that day. Today is the first time I have been to Gabbie's website- what an awesome picture you had created. God bless you all!
Beth
Mansfield, OH USA - Monday, November 10, 2003 10:05 AM CST
Monica & John, You are in my thoughts and prayers as always but especially as the date of Gabbies birth draws near. She is missed. I loved her so much. Love Sarah
Sarah Totall <saarahtotall@hotmail.com>
Mpls, MN - Monday, November 10, 2003 8:11 AM CST
Hi Monica.
I especially liked sunday's journal.I have so many questions that you are slowly answering. Sanfilippo seems to me to be a slow death and I just keep wondering.....
The preparation is the most difficult thing I will ever have to do. Some tell me to deal with it when the time comes.I don't think so.
Kathie <kathie12@sympatico.ca>
Canada - Monday, November 10, 2003 6:48 AM CST
Monica,
Gabbie's site is such a blessing to me every time I visit, and I find myself visiting more often. I always enjoy reading the quotes you leave from others and their books that they have written. They are always so "right on". My husband teaches Sr. High Sunday School and I have printed out a few of those quotes for him to use in his teaching. Of course, then he ties it all in with scripture and "wal-la" a better than curriculum, Bible lessen is created!! You are DEFINITELY doing God's work through this site. Blessings to you always.
In His love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Sunday, November 9, 2003 11:15 PM CST
Monica and John,
Have just finished spending hours reading your journal. I found your web page on the Safe In The Arms of God guestbook that you signed. My wife and I have a daughter in heaven like yourself. Our healthy, beautiful 9 month old Maggie Grace died on December 10, 2002. The doctors treated her for croup and ten minutes after she died told us that she had a "germ". They said it was Hib, a respiratory bacteria that children today are vaccinated against. Maggie had three of the four vaccinations and would have received the fourth when she was 12 months. All the research I have found shows that she is probably the only child who was properly vaccinated and who died of Hib. The medical community here wants us to just consider it as an unfortunate happening of events. Unlike Gabbie who had to suffer for so long, Maggie sufferred for just a short time and wasn't at the hands of an excellent medical staff like your Gabbie. When we were told that Maggie Grace was brain dead, we cried to Jesus to please take her back. We gave up our selfish rights and agreed to release her back to Jesus. A few hours later when she was taken off of life support, I was holding her and I could feel the life and her spirit leaving her body as her heart beat that last time. At that second I felt a warmth come across my arms and legs as I held her tight. I thought, "that little bugger peed on me one last time." As I got up to lay her body on the bed and cover her face, I felt underneath her and noticed that she was dry. I was convinced that I would be soaking wet myself and felt my arm and legs and was amazed that I too was dry. I knew at that moment that the comforting warmth that I felt was Jesus wrapping his arms around our Maggie Grace and caring her home "special delivery". I am searching endlessly for others who experienced what I experienced. Can you help? Like yourself, even though we have no doubts that Maggie and Gabbie are in heaven, this incredible pain and saddness is just so hard. The shatterred dreams and talk about the innocence lost. Thank you for being here to help so many hurting parents. Gabbie's work continues! We are determined to keep Maggie's memory alive through establishing a foundation to help abused and neglected children and for children who have never felt loved. We also hope to teach parent appreciation and awareness. There are far too many parents who don't know what they have in their children and our children suffer. My anger is directed at those parents. But if they walked down the road that we have been forced to walk down, what would they feel if their child just vanished. Here today, gone tomorrow. I can't handle the word "fair" anymore and I never used the word "hate" before. But I do hate this path that I have been led to follow, but I walk down it not alone. Jer 29:11
Thank you for being the inspiration to us all! We'll keep in touch! Doug
Douglas Mehlhaff <djmehlhaff@rushmore.com>
Rapid City, SD USA - Saturday, November 8, 2003 8:06 AM CST
Monica,
Thank you for introducing us to the He Cares ministry.
What an awesome and inspirational site!
Also, I wanted to say how much I agree with your words on sharing the gift and joy of our salvation. Becasue I too don't understand the idea of keeping the Good News to yourself.
Thank you for the link to Noah's website. He and his family are in my prayers as well. Very srongly..
My heart is grieving so much for the local family who lost their daughter yesterday in the bus accident. It is so awful. I know you are keeping them in your prayers as well.
God Bless,
Sara
www.caringbridge.com/mn/danielhammer <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Friday, November 7, 2003 9:00 PM CST
God bless your day! Looking forward to our lunch next week :)! Jesus, Jesus, Jesus hold St. Gabbie extra tight today and give her an extra kiss for me :)
Cathy and St. Theresa <WeLoveTeesa@Mailstation.Com; www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose>
St. Paul, mn usa - Thursday, November 6, 2003 1:35 PM CST
Monica,
Thank you for visiting Adrienne's page and for leaving the note. It blessed me because it seems to be very quiet since my last entry. But I too am concerned about the salvation of bereaved parents. I will visit Khalita's site as soon as I have a chance. Within the next year or so, I plan to start having bereaved mother's conferences. It is my prayer that many will come to know the Lord. Please, remember this in your prayers. I need intercessors that will pray this into existence. Thank you again for your encouraging words.
Adrienne's mom, Nichelle: http://www.caringbridge.org/tx/adrienne <rejoice_first_lady@yahoo.com>
Cedar Park, TX USA - Thursday, November 6, 2003 0:45 AM CST
Monica and John,
Thank you for coming to Zachary's funeral yesterday. We are now embarking on this journey that you have been on for almost a year and a half. It seems surreal. Company left by 7:30 last night and Bill and I looked at each other and didn't know what to do with ourselves. Our house is just so empty, so quiet. So are our hearts.
Thank you for all of your support. We would love to get together sometime. Our prayers continue to be with all of you as well.
Love, Jen and Bill Buckentine
Jen Buckentine <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Wednesday, November 5, 2003 9:42 PM CST
Hi Monica,
Just checking in to let you know I'm always thinking about you..and caring about you and yours so very much.
And always praying..
Thank you again for taking the time to journel so faithfully. You are touching so many lives in so many ways.
God Bless..
Your Friend,
Sara
www.caringbridge.com/mn/danielhammer <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Wednesday, November 5, 2003 12:24 AM CST
Hi Monica,
I have not replied often lately. I still visit, and read. Mostly, I don't know what to say that has not been said already. So, I say little. I just wanted to let you know, that I am still here and reading.
I'm sorry to hear about Zachary. It is always heartbreaking to hear about a child losing the battle with cancer.
Sue Elling
MN - Wednesday, November 5, 2003 12:16 AM CST
Monica,
What can I say? I know the past few days have been hard on you & John in so many ways and I am sorry for that. For those of us who have never lost a child, it is difficult to truly understand how devastating it has to be. We can imagine what it might feel like, but you have lived it and it brings it back all over again. You all belong to a club that I never want to be a part of...... I will continue to pray for the Buckentines and that you will find the strength to minister to them when the time comes. I also pray that the Lord would comfort you at this time. It really doesn't ever get easier does it? And I guess why would you ever want missing your baby to get easier? A sad, dreary day all in all, but God is still good. Take good care of yourself Monica.
Christy <calee59@wi.rr.com>
S. Milwaukee, WI - Tuesday, November 4, 2003 9:52 PM CST
Monica,
I'm so sorry about Zachary passing away. I'm glad that you are able to reach out to others walking this journey no one would choose. You've chosen to reach out and be a willing vessel for Our Lord and Savior and I'm thankful for you.
I'm so sorry as always for your pain and heartache and that you have to miss Gabbie at all.
With my Love in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Tuesday, November 4, 2003 9:07 PM CST
ugh I wrote an entry and accidently hit the clear button :( so I'll make it short this time, I'm really sorry about Zachary passing, it always saddens me when I see a child pass on before the parents the norm should be the other way around. I feel bad for there grieving hearts.
Monica I always think about your beautifl baby girl Gabbie with those big blue eyes, I see here as a warrior of God also even though she is not here, she is still bringing souls to God through her website. She is the first child I have been following through caringbridge and will always hold a special place in my heart. God bless your family
hugs and kisses to Aubry and Noah
sally <sally_torres@lusknet.com>
anaheim, - Tuesday, November 4, 2003 6:56 PM CST
Monica,
I'm so sad to read about Zachary's passing. I just don't know what to say. I am happy that you are there for Zachary's parents as a support person they can go to. As you know, it's difficult for those of us to know exactly what you are going through as many of us have not gone through what you have. There must be a comfort to Zachary's parents knowing they can talk to you about their feelings as you have been/are "in the same boat" as they are.
I will always thank you, Monica, for continuing to write in this journal as an awesome tribute to Gabbie, and also as a way of spreading Christ's word. There is something special about you and your family that keeps all of us "tuned in" to what you have to write each day.
Thanks, Monica, for all you do for those other parents in need. You are truly sent by God.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
MN USA - Monday, November 3, 2003 9:24 PM CST
Hi Monica; I'm so sorry about Zachary's death. It always amazes me to read the journal histories of the kids w/ pediatric cancer. The roller coaster ride the families go on is just amazing. Just a couple months ago, and Zachary seemed to be cancer free, and then when that tumor came back it was with such a vengeance. He was only a month older than my little Noah so it really hits home w/ me. And I know you are close to Jen - I know it will mean the world to her for you and John to be there for her and her family tomorrow. You are a very kind and gentle person. In His name,
Mari Beth Ross <maribeth.ross@nrgenergy.com>
Hugo, MN 55038 - Monday, November 3, 2003 4:59 PM CST
Monica,
I miss you and our lunches together ... I've just spent the last hour getting caught up on your life and those of your precious children. Thank you for continuing to share your life and for being honest about your grief and struggles-- you have been and continue to be an inspiration to me. Your passion for those who do not have faith in Jesus is beautiful ... and I truly believe that there will be many who "will be dere" because of your commmitment to telling the truth about Jesus.
Melissa Lindsey <paperandink@cloudnet.com>
St. Cloud, MN USA - Sunday, November 2, 2003 3:52 PM CST
Monica,
So sad to read of another little one passing away. I am so sorry for their pain and for the renewed pain it brings you. Cancer is ugly for anyone, but a baby is just wrong. I know we don't always understand God's plans, but things like this are hard to grasp and make me just want to say "why"??? I will pray that the Buckentine's faith in the Lord will uphold and comfort them and that you will also feel the Lord's touch. I know this hurts you so much and I grieve for everyone who loves this little boy. God bless.
Christy <calee59@wi.rr.com>
South Milwaukee, WI - Friday, October 31, 2003 11:09 PM CST
Monica,
My heart breaks so for Zachary's parents.
I am at a loss for words..I have no doubt that their pain is truly unbearable.
What a beautiful and special little boy.
His family will indeed be in my prayers.
God be with them.
Sara
www.caringbridge.com/mn/danielhammer <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Friday, October 31, 2003 9:09 PM CST
Monica,
Oh my gosh, I am crying at Zachary's passing into the arms of Jesus...thanks for letting me know. Yes, another saint with Gabbie and Theresa...why does it have to hurt so much? I feel their pain, your pain, my pain and although I know our little ones are in joy it just makes me so sad. Jesus, Jesus, Jesus be with us as we carry our crosses in life...they are so heavy at times, but we know you are with us.
Cathy and St. Theresa Rose <WeLoveTeesa@mailstation.com; www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose>
St. Paul, MN USA - Friday, October 31, 2003 4:42 PM CST
Monica, aka Christ's Warrior!,
Thanks for calling last night, it was so good to talk with you :). I am praying for you and thanking God for the gift of St. Gabbie...her mission continues even without her physical presence. What an amazing God we have who uses us in this life and in our eternal life! St. Gabbie continues to make a difference to all of us left on earth.
Cathy and St. Theresa Rose <WeLoveTeesa@Mailstation.Com; www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose>
St. Paul, MN USA - Friday, October 31, 2003 2:28 PM CST
Monica,
Just thinking of your sweet Gabbie today-- I hugged my precious God daughter Emily (she's 14 months old) a little longer and a little tighter tonight in memory and honor of sweet Gabbie. I wish I had met her here on earth and I so look forward to meeting her and hugging her in heaven.
My love in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Thursday, October 30, 2003 8:40 PM CST
Monica,
I so enjoy reading your entries. It is obvious God is with you as you write. We continue to think of your family every day. Lina always asks to "light a candle for Gabbie" at church.
Love,
Natalie & Lina Rak (www.caringbridge.com/fl/lina) <vladanat@comcast.net>
Jacksonville, FL - Wednesday, October 29, 2003 2:38 PM CST
Dear Monica,
So sorry that you are having a difficult time-- forgiveness is so hard sometimes-- especially when we have been hurt so deeply. You're in my prayers as you continue to work through this. So sorry as always for your hurting heart as you continue to miss your sweet Gabbie-- knowing she's safe with Jesus I know brings you comfort, but in no way erases your longing to be with her.
My love in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Wednesday, October 29, 2003 12:56 AM CST
Hi Monica...I find so much comfort everytime I come here...It is so hard for me to forgive and to forget, sometimes my anger just consumes me. (then i come here and I feel better)...I thank God everyday for you, hope we can meet in person soon!!!
aileen lee <milf31@hotmail.com>
rancho cucamonga, ca usa - Wednesday, October 29, 2003 10:52 AM CST
Monica,
I try to come here every day. I find comfort in your words, and as you know, so many feel like my own. I keep you in my thoughts and pray that this forgiveness with other's gets to the point that you need it to be. It is so very hard I know. The biggest diappointment is to have those who you only would have hoped, prayed, expected...to be there for you during Gabbie's fight against this cancer, and they chose not to be. It sometimes is hard to always have to be the strong one. The forgiving one. But God is using you at this time to be a voice to many, and I know that He will lead you and see you through on this matter. I too am working through my issues on the same matter. It is hard, but each little step has brought some healing. You are a special friend, and I love you lots. God bless you.
Jackson's mom, Michelle <eaglet@cltcomm.net>
Clear Lake, Wisconsin - Tuesday, October 28, 2003 9:03 PM CST
thank you for opening up your life to us. you are helping many people in many ways that you will never know.
a lot of people silently read your journals, but do not sign the guestbook for whatever reason but please know that they are there reading and learning.
a reader <www.areader@yahoo.com>
- Tuesday, October 28, 2003 6:35 PM CST
Hi Monica
I've been reading your journals since Gabbie was first sick. I've watched and read your journey and sorrows. I'm still watching your journey as you wade through grief and the human race and society. Know that I continue to keep your family in my thoughts and prayers. Will we ever understand why people do what they do? We can only pray for them. HUGS
Mary Lee (www.caringbridge.com/mn/davis.leukemia) <mleep@msn.com>
- Tuesday, October 28, 2003 2:30 PM CST
Don't ever feel the need to appoligize for how you feel. Your emotions are just that yours and at times they are very raw, but you have the courage and the strength to share them with us.
Jennifer Miles www.caringbridge.org/mn/deemartinson/ <jennifer.miles@thomson.com>
Minneapolis, MN USA - Tuesday, October 28, 2003 8:34 AM CST
Hi Monica,
You never have to aplogize for negative feelings in your journals. You are such a sincere and honest person and all those human feelings are a part of it.
And I can't even imagine how complicated feelings can be after the loss of your own child. And in countless ways I'm sure.
Please know that the people that care about you, your family and Gabbie just want you to be yourself.. always.
No apologies ever! :o)
God Bless,
Sara
www.caringbridge.com/mn/danielhammer <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Monday, October 27, 2003 11:29 PM CST
Monica,
You don't need to explain or apologize for being "negative". Take your time to sort things out with the help of the Lord. I can't imagine anyone being disrespectful to little Gabbie, but unfortunately there are all types in this world. I am so sorry that you had to deal with this then and now. Will keep you in my prayers.
Christy
S. Milwaukee, WI - Monday, October 27, 2003 9:54 PM CST
Monica--don't think you are alone...we all have issues that we put aside because they are too painful to deal with. I am sorry that you have to deal with these things, but it sounds as though you have found a way to be empowered (by the Spirit?) to tackle them and make things more right within you if not in those around you who are part of the problem. My issues are surely different from yours, I know, but there are many people who are insensitive towards families with children with disabilities and our precious children, too. Though I hate to judge others, these people are missing out on a big blessing and obviously don't know our Savior or choose to ignore the fact that "they are precious in His sight--ALL THE CHILDREN OF THE WORLD!" And that means the ones who are fighting cancer, the ones with chromisomal abnormalities, the ones who are paralyzed, the ones with autism, the ones who have suffered and died, the ones who suffer and live...and even the healthy ones :^)! They each were created in His image and bear His mark, and He loves them and bids them come. Oh, that we all would have the hearts of these children...without bitterness or malice and with unconditional love. Gabbie's "sweet spirit" exemplified these qualities--thank you for always putting that before us, your readers. I am praying for you as you work through your issues, that God would lead you in His way for healing of your heart and soul and being a standard bearer for Him. Sending much love and as much empathy as I can--Melody
Melody Bell
Baltimore, MD - Monday, October 27, 2003 9:04 PM CST
I'm praying for you Monica as you deal with issues that are obviously painful.
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Monday, October 27, 2003 7:23 PM CST
Dear Monica,
Thank you for sharing your personal photos with us in the photo section. They are so precious.
You are right..it is SO hard to believe there are people out there who relish in others heartache. I will never understand that but I do pray for those people.
Fortunately, I also think that for every person like that, there are far more loving and caring folks. It is a shame that everyone cannot be sincere, honest and good hearted.
Another thing I will never understand!
Please also know that there are FAR more people who truly care for Gabbie (and for the other children in heaven)than the ones ones who think of them as "someone else's child".
(The very thought is so disturbing and unbelievable to me).
So please know (as I'm sure you do) that myself and the majority of people in this world LOVE Gabbie, and she is not "somebody elses child." I shudder at the thought of others thinking the death of any child is in any way "excusable" or "comforting"(for lack of better words)
but you know what I mean.
Thanks again for your continued journeling and sincere words.
Our love and prayers ALWAYS dear Monica.
Your friends in Christ,
The Hammer's
www.caringbridge.com/mn/danielhammer <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Sunday, October 26, 2003 6:26 PM CST
Hi Monica and family-
Sorry it's been so long since I last wrote in here. No, I haven't forgotten about you guys!
The new pics you posted are very cute, but yet, it still breaks my heart. . . I have been hearing this song on K102 about a mother talking to God in the middle of the night as her 7 year old is fighting for her life. Maybe Cheri Austin sings it, I'm not sure. But anyway, whenever I hear that song, I think of you guys. Jon was gone with the girls yesterday morning and as I was getting ready for the day, that song came on and I coulnd't even put on my make up because I was crying so much. I just still can't imagine, and I know I have told you that a million times. . .
I just want you to know that I think about you guys everyday and Monica, I appreciate you keeping up the website.
Always in my thoughts and prayers.
Becky <peanutpie3879@netscape.net>
MN USA - Sunday, October 26, 2003 3:59 PM CST
Monica,
I'm sorry that we live in a world where people enjoy the trials of others, but unfortunately we both know it's true. Thank you for continuing to share your lives with us, even knowing that you risk inviting those types of people into your world. May they be touched by your words if that is the case. Enjoyed the new pictures, Gabbie had such wise, solemn eyes, like she knows something we don't. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to get to know her even if only through your words and pictures. Have a blessed week and please keep up the good work!! PS Can you stop & visit me too on your road trip???
Christy <calee59@wi.rr.com>
S. Milwaukee, WI - Sunday, October 26, 2003 3:27 PM CST
Hi Monica,
Just wanted you to know I'm here reading and praying for you. You're posts are a wonderful witness--thanks again and again for using the web site of your precious Gabbie to reach out to others--you are amazing! Thought of you today when I heard the Steven Curtis Chapman song "With Hope" and I'm so thankful that you could say Goodbye to Gabbie with Hope and a promise that you will see her face again.
With my Love in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@Insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Friday, October 24, 2003 5:56 PM CDT
Hi Monica,
I came back for another refreshing. Thank you for your daily words of wisdom. We pray for your family daily for peace and comfort.
Craig Levine www.caringbridge.org/il/elijah <wakbyfaith@yahoo.com>
Pawnee, IL - Friday, October 24, 2003 7:18 AM CDT
Hi Monica,
I've emailed you a couple of times and you have always been so gracious in replying. I always check in with your site at the end of my day. I appreciate your words - you always leave me with things to think about. And yes, Gabbie, I will be dere, too.
Hope you have a nice weekend.
Love,
Dana
Dana Maeda <bmaeda@unique-software.com>
Inver Grove Heights, MN USA - Thursday, October 23, 2003 10:53 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
Thank you so much for sharing your faith story here. What a wonderful testimony to our Lord you are. Every time I read one of your journal entries I'm challenged to share my faith even more openly. Thanks for being a willing vessel for God-- Philemon 1:4-7 "The Hearts of the Saints have been refreshed by you, brother". These verses are so true of you Monica. Praying for your peace-- so sorry as always for your loss of sweet precious Gabbie-- Can't wait to meet you both in Heaven!!
My Love in Christ,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Thursday, October 23, 2003 4:30 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
Your faith story was beautiful. Thank you.
I have not had computer access until now as Daniel and I are in NY for his monthly treatments. So when I was able to finally get on today I caught up on your journaling.
I will never stop reading, caring, or praying for you.
Nor will I stop greiving for you.. for how much you miss your precious Saint Gabbie.
Thank you for sharing your faith story,and your love of Jesus with us.
My Love Always,
Sara
www.caringbridge.com/mn/danielhammer <hammertime311@comcast.net>
- Thursday, October 23, 2003 3:14 PM CDT
Monica
Please include a visit to our home on your "dream" tour.
I read your journal everyday. It provides me with the inspiration needed to carry on with our little girl(SanfilippoB). I would be honoured to speak with you.
Kathie <kathie12@sympatico.ca>
Canada - Thursday, October 23, 2003 1:51 PM CDT
Thinking of your beautiful family today:) Your always in my prayers!! Your a true testiment to christians, God bless you always.
P.S. I love the picture of the three kids together
sally <sally_torres@lusknet.com>
- Thursday, October 23, 2003 11:01 AM CDT
Monica,
Thank you for your incredible and thoughtful message to me today. You have really picked up my spirits with your story and with your family's faith. I have really been working through God's word to be able to better defend the Gospel truth that Sarah is with Jesus. I am very proud of your faith. Never stop telling the Good News. Let's bring as many people to the feast as we can with God's help. Love you, sister!
Robert Dearmon <rob@sarahdearmon.com>
Midlothian, VA USA - Wednesday, October 22, 2003 5:31 PM CDT
You continue to inspire me...thank you for being an open and willing vessal through which the Lord works. Your faith story was moving and one that I'm sure touched many hearts. May we all pray to know what the Lord's will is for our lives...how might we all evangelize better, using the exact talents that our Lord has given us? It is a question I continue to ponder and pray about each day. God bless you faithful friend and faithful momma!!!! St. Gabbie is a blessed girl to have you!
Cathy and St. Theresa Rose; www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose < WeLoveTeesa@Mailstation.Com>
St. Paul, MN USA - Wednesday, October 22, 2003 12:48 AM CDT
You story of faith is beautiful, Monica, just as I knew it would be. Besides having the gift of faith, God has given you a tremendous ability to express yourself eloquently. That you have done, my friend.
Now, I need to know something...did John take you up on your offer???? :)
Big hugs,
Suz
Susan King <suznk_01@yahoo.com>
Fresno, for now, CA USA - Tuesday, October 21, 2003 11:46 PM CDT
Monica,
Your faith story touched me deeply. I am sure many others that heard it and will read it will be moved also. God always saves, but I am sure you have planted many seeds in the lost souls hearts. Bless you always.
Love,
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Tuesday, October 21, 2003 5:06 PM CDT
Monica,
That was beautiful. It spoke to my soul.
Thank you,
Jennifer Miles www.caringbridge.org/mn/deemartinson/ <jennifer.miles@thomson.com>
Minneapolis, MN USA - Tuesday, October 21, 2003 8:11 AM CDT
Monica,
Your faith story was beautiful. I have no doubt that it made many people think about their eternal future. Reading your journal entries continually makes me yearn for a closer relationship with Christ. It is very difficult to find the time I would like grow closer to Him, but I know that there is nothing more important. Thanks for always reminding me of that.
Love, Jen Buckentine <jenbucke@hotmail.com>
St. Cloud, MN - Monday, October 20, 2003 10:28 PM CDT
Monica,
Once again, I am in tears as I read your update.....it was just beautiful. What a fire the Lord has set to your soul, it is so like Him to take your doubt and use it to not only bless others, but to bless you. I am once again reminded of the harvest that is waiting to be reaped. I am spurred on, you are doing your part, am I doing mine??? I always leave this site with questions to ponder and mull over. Thank you once again for sharing the invaluable insight of a 2 year old, wise beyond her years. God bless you and the rest of your dear family.
Christy <calee59@wi.rr.com>
South Milwaukee, WI - Monday, October 20, 2003 7:56 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
Thinking of you and praying for you this weekend as you share your faith story at Wooddale Church. I am sure it will touch and move many people.
Happy belated birthday Aubrey!! Hope it was an extra special day!!
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Sunday, October 19, 2003 11:30 AM CDT
Have been praying for your faith story...may the Spirit powerfully use your words! Earthly birthdays are wonderful (a belated "HAPPY" to Miss Aubrey), but oh the joy of the spiritual birth...may your life continue to touch others and point them to THE WAY! Love--Melody
Melody Bell
Baltimore, MD - Sunday, October 19, 2003 9:07 AM CDT
Happy 5th Birthday Aubrey!!! Hope your day was extra special!! 5 is an awesome age!!!
Monica- Praying for your faith story! Hope it went well and I'll be anxious to hear all about it!
My love in Christ to all of you-- Extra Birthday hugs and kisses from me to Aubrey!
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Sunday, October 19, 2003 7:20 AM CDT
Happy Birthday Aubrey! Five is a great age, hope you make the most of this year!!
Christy
S. Milwaukee, WI - Saturday, October 18, 2003 10:44 AM CDT
Happy Birthday to Aubrey! Wow #5! That is a biggie!
You are as cute as a button, honey..I hope to meet you someday..You and my Jenny would have a great time!
Monica-I'll be thinking of you as you share your faith story.
I KNOW you will touch many hearts by your words and your beautiful faith. You have such a faithful heart and I do believe the Holy Spirit will guide you and be with you completely.
God Bless!
With Love,
Sara
www.caringbridge.com/mn/danielhammer
- Friday, October 17, 2003 11:52 PM CDT
Aubrey, Happy 5th Birthday!!
Dana Sanford <pooh_n_tigger2002@yahoo.com>
Jackson, Mi - Friday, October 17, 2003 10:26 PM CDT
Happy Birthday to Aubrey, Happy Birthday to You!
Love,
Natalie & Lina Rak (www.caringbridge.com/fl/lina) <vladanat@attbi.com>
jacksonville, fl - Friday, October 17, 2003 8:54 PM CDT
Monica,
I am praying for you in a bigger way this weekend! You are a strong evangelizer and a gifted speaker...may you touch many hearts this weekend and beyond :). God bless you!!!!!
p.s. I put new pictures on my little saint's website :).
Cathy and St. Theresa Rose <www.caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose>
St. Paul, MN USA - Friday, October 17, 2003 4:02 PM CDT
Miss Aubrey...
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU... HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU....HAPPY BIRTHDAY Sweetie!!
I am glad that you gifts arrived safely..
Have a fun day and don't eat to much cake...
Love ya sweetie!
Give mommy, daddy and baby Noah a BIG hugs from me!
XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO
Lots of Love,
Angel Sheryl
Sheryl Gunzenhauser <mik181@mchsi.com>
Winnebago, MN - Friday, October 17, 2003 1:41 PM CDT
I haven't posted in a while. I still check in every day, but then I read postings from parents who have also lost a child and again, I'm at a loss for words. I did want to wish Aubrey a Happy Birthday! I absolutely love your picture on this site. I'm still reading your entry's every day although I have to admit that some of them go over my head. I'm trying. Take care, my thoughts are with your family every day.
Rhonda Meyer <rschultz@scl.doc.state.mn.us>
- Friday, October 17, 2003 11:56 AM CDT
HAPPY BIRTHDAY AUBREY! Five is the most AWESOME age!
jan livingstone (Andy's Mom forever)
- Friday, October 17, 2003 11:35 AM CDT
Hi Ms. monica, please tell aubry happy birthday and we have a surprise for her in the mail!!
happy birthday aubrey!!!
love, tay
taylor lee (kyle's sister) <www.kylelee28.com>
rancho cucamonca, ca usa - Thursday, October 16, 2003 9:31 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
I have done the same thing with the checkbook register. I was cleaning out some old records and found that I had written a check donation to Children's Hospital on April 27th a couple of years (to the day) before Steve died. I have also studied my handwriting to see if it looked different then. Actually, it did--my handwriting has since become much more messy.
We parents who have lost a child look at so many things in a different way than we did before.
Thiking of you always,
Janine
Janine Nielsen
Minneapolis, MN - Thursday, October 16, 2003 9:24 AM CDT
Monica,
I find myself checking for an update on here everyday. I have learned so much from you, and I just wanted you to know that. A certain scripture comes to mind when I think of you:
Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven.
Matthew 5:16
You definitely have a ministry here. I know how touched I am when I read your entries, and I also know there are countless others "touched", but who maybe aren't comfortable signing in. The love you have for Gabbie leaps out of every word that you write about her. Oh, what a reunion the two of you will have someday!
(By the way, thanks for signing Connor's guestbook!)
Love, hugs and prayers,
Rhonda Hunley, Connor's Mommy
Connor's web page
**Hugs and Hope** Rhabdomyosarcoma relapse
<rshunley@comcast.net>
Hendersonville, TN **God Bless the USA!** - Thursday, October 16, 2003 9:03 AM CDT
Monica,
Just wanted you to know I was here and reading your postings. You are amazing!!! Thanks for sharing so deeply from your heart and Amen to what you quoted today.
I'm so sorry that you must feel the pain of losing your sweet Gabbie. I'm sorry that your life is forever shattered and nothing will ever be the same. I was thinking of you today as I was re-reading Joni Erickson Tada's book "Heaven- Your real home". It never fails to make Heaven seem so very real to me, and in the book Joni talks about making "dates" with people in Heaven--- and I wanted you to know you and your sweet precious Gabbie are high on my list of people I want to meet and speak with when I get to Heaven. (I know there will be a long line-- good thing we shall have all of enterity.)
Thanks again for using Gabbie's death-- and your pain to reach out to people through God's Word and share the truth of the One and Only way to Heaven-- Through Jesus Christ our Lord.
My Love in Christ to you and your whole family,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Wednesday, October 15, 2003 8:54 PM CDT
Monica,
I can't even keep count of the little ones that have passed away since I started following the Caringbridge sites. It's just too many though.....when you put a face and a name to "childhood cancer", how can you not be moved?? Thanks for directing us to these grieving families, such a small thing for us to do, to say a kind word or offer up a prayer. I've seen some of the nastiness going around on some of the sites also and saw your entry about being lied to on Gabbie's page. Part of me wants to not believe that people can be so cruel, but that realistic part of me remembers what its says in scripture about satan roaming about like a lion looking for something to devour. It's not enough that there's such an ugly thing as cancer that kills little children. To add insult to injury is his way of never being satisfied and always wanting to hurt us more. We need to be vigilant and recognize his tactics for what they are. Even though we may be angry with people for their insensitivity, we must also remember to pray earnestly for them that their eyes may be opened. We will all be held accountable one day for the words we speak.... I know I have my share that I would rather forget. Anyway, once again thank you for helping us to remember others and to just be aware and to be ever so ready!! God bless........
PS Did I sound too preachy???!!
Christy
S. Milwaukee, WI - Wednesday, October 15, 2003 6:18 PM CDT
Monica; I understand your feelings. I haven't even lost a child, yet I feel deep love for these little children that are so loved and lost by their parents and loved ones. I also saw Cameron's obit and on his website that little bald head on the shoulder reminded me so of Gabbie. The sight of a bald head on such an innocent little face is so sad. And I think knowing people like you whose journey I've followed gives me insight into how much pain, questioning, heartache etc, is in store for their parents in the days, months and years ahead. And little Noah Prichard - I too have followed his site for a few months. His parents brought him to Duke to go through a transplant in hopes it would give him a life, but the earthly cure was not to be. I just put myself in their shoes and how hard it has been for them; to spend most of the little guy's life in the hospital. These little faces have imprinted my heart forever. I hope to see you this weekend at Wooddale. Talk to you soon. Love,
Mari Beth Ross <maribeth.ross@nrgenergy.com>
Hugo, MN - Wednesday, October 15, 2003 4:46 PM CDT
hi ms. monica. thanks for sending my mom the book. she is still crying. i will be sending aubre and noah presents.
love, tay
taylor lee <tbl777@hotmail.com>
rancho cucmonga, ca usa - Wednesday, October 15, 2003 1:14 AM CDT
I agree with Yvonne...Amen! Thank you as well for your kind words on Baby Noah's site. I have been following his journey since March. I'm sorry that someone misled you on your guestbook, I just don't understand how someone could do that. Good luck with your faith story, I'll be thinking of you. God bless!
Robin Boger
Lewisville, NC - Tuesday, October 14, 2003 4:48 PM CDT
Amen, Amen, and AMEN!!!
I always have alot of "AMENS!" when I read your entries! I am always blessed by them!
Just a quick note to say "Hi", "we love ya" and you are in our hearts, thoughts and prayers daily!
You truly are a blessing to us Monica! May God bless you and comfort you and heal your hurting heart.
With Lots of Love,
Your Friend/Sister in Christ,
Yvonne, Leilani's mom Leilani's page
Fernandez Family <yvonnengzs@rjia.net>
Mt Airy, NC - Tuesday, October 14, 2003 11:56 AM CDT
Hi Monica and family,
All I can say is "AMEN!" Simple and profound. God is good!
Big hugs,
Suz King
Susan King <suznk_01@yahoo.com>
Fresno, for now, CA USA - Tuesday, October 14, 2003 1:38 AM CDT
Dear Monica,
Yes, it is so true and so profound..Jesus died on the cross for us..for our sins, so that we may have eternal life.
When ever I think of that I am overwhelemed and filled with Joy! I am so unworthy; yet so grateful. I consciously try to become more worthy every day. What a gift. Thank You Jesus! And thank you, Monica for the beautiul reminder of His Grace!
Your Friend,
Sara
www.caringbridge.com/mn/danielhammer
- Monday, October 13, 2003 10:39 PM CDT
Dear Monica,
I have have never signed in before, but I have been following your journal entries for a while now. I didn't find your site until after your precious Gabby had gone on to Heaven, but I've enjoyed reading about and getting to know her a bit from your site. She is so beautiful as are all of your children.
I'm so amazed and challenged at your willingness to use your site as such a wonderful witnessing tool for our Lord. I'm sure that many people will be greatly blessed by your faith story and I know you've blessed many by your words on the website and have certaintly given many food for thought and planted many seeds--you are a wonderful missionary!
I'm looking forward to meeting your sweet Gabby in Heaven!
In Christ's Love,
Heather
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Saturday, October 11, 2003 6:32 AM CDT
Dear Monica,
There is no doubt in my mind that when you tell your faith story to the people at Wooddale Church that many will be blessed. You have certainly blessed me many times with what you have shared on Gabbie's web site.
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Saturday, October 11, 2003 0:33 AM CDT
Monica,
Is it truly frightening how we have let "New Age" spirituality creep into our midst. Even members of my own family are easily seduced by it, people who should know better. It is so easy to believe the lies , because we may not want to hear the truth, then we must do something with it!!! Too much touchy, feely and not enough truth, because if we speak it, we are intolerant and narrow-minded. Thank you once again for being brave enough to go where some of us (me) are afraid to tread. I wish I could be there for your faith story, although I know some of it (courtesy of Gabbie's site) it would be something to hear it in person. You will do an awesome job because you have something God wants you to share.....I wonder whose life will be touched by it?? Good luck this weekend, I will look forward to hearing how it went.
Christy
South Milwaukee, WI - Friday, October 10, 2003 4:51 PM CDT
Monica. I had to go back and read all your journal entries for this week today because I have not had a chance to check them. What an AMAZING encouragement to find that the Lord has had me on the VERY same topics this week. I'm teaching on Acts on Wednesday nights at our bible study and we are in Chapter 4. The Lord gave me some of the very same things you have shared here to discuss this week---VERBATIM! Anyways, just wanted you to know that I love you and am continually thinking about and praying for you. Blessings and love in Christ.
Khalita My Caringbridge Site Duke Peds BMT Aplastic Anemia <khalita@hecaresonline.org>
Lexington, NC - Thursday, October 9, 2003 8:34 PM CDT
Monica! It was so nice to meet you! What a blessing we have in the body of Christ...
Thank you for your entry that mentioned Theresa Rose, it made me cry and was so beautiful. So much suffering here on earth, but oh so great a joy in heaven!
God bless you and may St. Gabbie and St. Theresa always pray for us.
Cathy and St. Theresa Rose <caringbridge.org/mn/theresarose>
st. Paul, mn usa - Thursday, October 9, 2003 1:51 PM CDT
This family could really use everyone's prayers.
http://www.caringbridge.org/hi/noah/
Cheryl
Harrisburg, PA - Thursday, October 9, 2003 1:01 PM CDT
Thank you for putting that information on Gabbie's page. I did make a donation in memory of Gabbie. I would glady give up a month of lunches to help kids with cancer and their parents. Thank you so much.
Rhonda Meyer <rschultz@scl.doc.state.mn.us>
- Thursday, October 9, 2003 9:59 AM CDT
Hi and Happy Anniversary to you and John!
(It is so good to know I'm not the only one that confuses
dates!)
I hope Aubrey is feeling better. I can imagine how bad of a tummy ache that was--ouch! I hope she is comforable again!
God Bless,
Sara
www.caringbridge.com/mn/danielhammer
- Tuesday, October 7, 2003 11:45 PM CDT
Happy Anniversary!! My husband and I were also married on this day. I hope you had a wonderful day.
Debbie Nagy
St. Louis, MO - Tuesday, October 7, 2003 10:33 PM CDT
Happy Anniversary! Thinking of you all today. God bless!
Robin Boger <Robin.Boger@rbc.com>
Lewisville, NC - Tuesday, October 7, 2003 8:03 PM CDT
Happy Anniversary---again! Hope you enjoyed today. I received your letter in the mail this week. Blessings to you and lots of love in Christ. You continue to be in my prayers.
Khalita My Caringbridge Site Duke Peds BMT Aplastic Anemia <khalita@hecaresonline.org>
Lexington, NC, - Tuesday, October 7, 2003 3:33 PM CDT
Hi Monica,
Just saying hi and Happy Anniversary! God is so good and so faithful! I've just felt so blessed lately and that's in large part because I've really been delving into the Word and that's in LARGE part because of your testimony and journalling. I just thought you should know this. God's Word never returns void whether it's in one heart, or broadcast over the internet! Bless His Holy Name!
In Him,
Suz
Susan King <suznk_01@yahoo.com>
Fresno, for now, CA USA - Monday, October 6, 2003 8:52 PM CDT
Hi Monica,
You can be sure you are making a difference and "planting many seeds" for salvation. You are doing God's work so beautifully.
I also wanted to tell you how very CUTE Aubrey is in the picture too! She really looks a lot like her mom.
I bet her and my Jenny would get along so well. We should try to get our 2 girls together some time.
Don't ever doubt about the effect your journaling has on the salvation of others. You really do express yourself so beautifully..very truthfully and sincerely.
It would be impossible for you to not make a difference for the positive..with your loving and enthusistic spirit
of The Word.
You are always in my daily prayers.
God Bless!
Sara
www.caringbridge.com/mn/danielhammer <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Monday, October 6, 2003 3:47 PM CDT
hi im taylor my big brother Kyle Lee just passed away in june...your daughter is soo cute...well pray for you
love Taylor
Taylor Lee <tbl777@hotmail.com>
Alta Loma , CA USA - Sunday, October 5, 2003 7:31 PM CDT
Happy Anniversary!!!!
Suzanne
Gardner , KS USA - Saturday, October 4, 2003 11:35 PM CDT
Monica,
You and John have been through a lot in nine years. It's funny when the Lord is the glue that holds us together, we really "stick" it out thru thick and thin. Hope you have a blessed anniversary cherishing memories of your life together.
Christy
- Saturday, October 4, 2003 7:24 PM CDT
Happy Anniversary. Lots of love to you guys in Christ.
Khalita My Caringbridge Site Duke Peds BMT Aplastic Anemia <khalita@hecaresonline.org>
Lexington, NC - Saturday, October 4, 2003 6:29 PM CDT
John & Monica~
HAPPY ANNIVERSARY !!!!!
Have a wonderful day together...I am so glad that you have each each other!
Give the kids BIG HUGS & LOTS OF KISSES!!!
Lots of love to you both~
((( ANGEL HUGS )))
Love,
Sheryl
Sheryl Gunzenhauser <mik181@mchsi.com>
Winnebago, MN - Saturday, October 4, 2003 2:40 PM CDT
Monica,
Happy anniversary to you and John today! I wish you an abundance of blessings today and every day!
God Bless You!
Your friend,
Sara
Sara Hammer <hammertime311@comcast.net>
Lakeland, MN USA - Saturday, October 4, 2003 11:50 AM CDT
Wishing you and John a very Happy Anniversary. :)
I remember the first week that Mike and I were at Mpls. Children's when Jack was diagnosed. We were told that in the cases of a child's cancer, that a marriage will either get stronger, or end in divorce. I have seen both sides happen. I think that the ones that get stronger also have that focus on the Lord. God gives us strength to endure that could only come from Him.
I am so thankful that you and John have that strong marriage. It is such a blessing in this day and age.
Thinking of you today...and every day.
Your friend, Michelle
Clear Lake, WI - Saturday, October 4, 2003 8:44 AM CDT
I've been following your website since Gabbie's story first aired on KARE11 but I don't believe I've ever signed in. I also follow numerous other Caring Bridge sites. My husband and I will also be married 9 years in December. I am the mother to 3 boys, ages 6,4 and 1. I also lost 3 babies to miscarriage and 1 to anencephaly. Your October 1 note on grief really caught my attention and is the reason I decided to sign in. About 4 weeks ago I lost my mother, she was only 56 years old and I am 28 years old. When I think about the fact that she is really gone it takes my breath away also. I know our situations are different and I wouldn't compare my journey to yours but this has been an extremely difficult time for me. Your words described exactly what I feel. She was diagnosed with cervical cancer 4 years ago and won that battle, however since then she has had numerous complications due to radiation damage. The radiation damaged her kidneys, bladder, uterus, intestines, arteries, etc etc. She had been hospitalized a good share of her last 4 months of life and endured a lot of pain and suffering. I am comforted because I know she is no longer suffering or in any pain. Of course I could go on and on but this got too long already. The picture of your 3 children is beautiful, brought tears to my eyes. Take care and God Bless!
Angie M <jamages@yahoo.com>
Paynesville, MN - Friday, October 3, 2003 8:16 PM CDT
Amen! Amen! and Amen!
I love your entries.....words of wisdom!
You know, that quote describes exactly what pushes me to do more...."it's not that I'm afraid to die, but I am ashamed to die!"
When Leilani died, I immediately decided to go back to school to become a nurse. I knew that it was my calling...my ministry, to work with terminally ill children. I knew that I would be serving Him in that way for the rest of my life.
But then I got sick, while I was in school, and the thought hit me like a ton of bricks...."what if I die BEFORE I become a nurse?" I keep saying, "when I am a nurse" I will do this or that....but what if I die before that happens? I realized I can't just say "I will do this or that"....but I have to serve Him NOW!, even while I am preparing for my ministry. We have to serve Him in our lives, the way we live, the things we do and say...it is all a testimony unto the world.
My pastor used to say the difference betweens the saved that serve and the saved that don't is those that DON'T will enter with their heads bowed in shame. I've always said, I don't want to enter heaven with my head bowed in shame...I want to be able to say I did something FOR HIM.
That quote sums it all up in a few words..."I'm not afraid to die....I'm ashamed to die!" We should all feel like that....humbled before the glory and greatness of our all powerful God. I pray that your entry will inspire many to do more for Him. You are most definitely serving Him!
God bless you now and always my friend. I pray that He fill you with His peace and heal you broken heart!
With much Love in Him,
Your Friend/Sister in the Lord,
Yvonne Fernandedez <yvonnengzs@rjia.net>
- Friday, October 3, 2003 1:21 PM CDT
Monica,
That is a very though provoking passage.... really makes me want to get up in the morning and do things the right way! This is my first time to sign Gabbie's guestbook, but as always I get so much out of your entries. I think today I will be very cognizant of what I'm doing to secure those future crowns to lay at His feet.... Thanks for your faithfulness.
Christy Lee
S. Milwaukee, WI - Friday, October 3, 2003 9:19 AM CDT
hi monica...i visit your site everyday for words of encouragement..i wish i was strong like you...since kyle passed i have questioned my faith, but going to your site helps me...what did you mean when you said our chairs are dangerous????God bless...
aileen lee <www.kylelee28.com>
rancho cucamonga, ca usa - Thursday, October 2, 2003 10:32 AM CDT
I am new to ^^Gabbie's^^ web page today,
(I found her site from your kind posting on ^^Julia Levy's^^ guestbook.)
May God Bless your Aubrey and Noah and your darling ^^Gabbie^^ in Heaven.
Sending you prayers of comfort in your sorrow,
Ginny
- Wednesday, October 1, 2003 3:36 PM CDT
Your note on grief was powerful for me. I've been praying about establishing a bereaved mother's retreat or conference. I certainly never wanted to be used by God in that way. I would have volunteered to be anything -- a missionary to the farthest reaches of the earth -- before I would have volunteered to be a bereaved mother. I pray that your talk goes well and that many are blessed by it. Our daughters' deaths are not in vain. John 12:24 "I assure you, most solemnly I tell you, Unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains [just one grain; it never becomes more but lives] by itself alone. But if it dies, it produces many others and yields a rich harvest."
Adrienne's mom, Nichelle: http://www.caringbridge.org/tx/adrienne <rejoice_first_lady@yahoo.com>
Cedar Park, TX USA - Wednesday, October 1, 2003 1:54 PM CDT
Click here to sign the guestbook.
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