First, I cannot express how touched Vince and I were at Shelbi’s calling hours for the amount of people and love that came to show they cared. Everyone was so wonderful and the most unexpected people who showed up truly touched us. Thanks for all the kind words and all of the hugs.
Shelbi’s Celebration of Life was absolutely beautiful. I don’t know how many people called to tell me that it was the most beautiful memorial they have ever been too. Thank you Pastor Bryan, Pastor Nancy and all the COTL family for putting so many personal touches on it. The memories that Pastor Nancy brought up about Shelbi surely showed the love she had for her. Shelbi had to have been looking down and laughing when Pastor Bryan related Shelbi’s life to that of Dora and Swiper and speaking about rainbows during his sermon. It was awesome, and so so personalized. And Lynne and Mike Sage, the music was absolutely beautiful, the songs you lead in and the special music you provided, words cannot express our thanks. We are so blessed to have a church family that cares so much about our family. Vince and I pray that we can give it back someday - somehow. So, thank you!
And again, thanks to the kitchen staff who provided us a dinner. The room looked great and so ready to celebrate our Shelbi’s life. Thanks to so many people who brought extra food. Thanks to all those who came. It was wonderful and a beautiful way to end the day.
Mrs. Saylor, Mrs. Unferdorfer, and Mrs Bender, thank you, thank you, thank you! I know it had to have been hard to get up and talk about Shelbi, but your stories were awesome. I had so many people tell me how nice it was that you talked and what a great job you did. You have brought joy to the memorial and smiles to so many people as they heard the fun stories about Shelbi’s life in preschool. Again, no words can express how thankful we are and have been to have you. You have been Shelbi’s guardian angels here on earth for those hours you looked after her during the year. When Shelbi was happy this year because of you, we were happy! So, thank you!
Well, our family is, I guess, okay. Okay is the word I guess that best fits. We have our moments and continue to hold each other up during the difficult times. I feel like mornings and getting out of bed is not that bad. I have had some horrible mornings when I didn’t want to get out of bed when Shelbi was with us, because I knew that she would wake up, move, and be in pain when she moved. I would lay with her and hold her until some more medicine would “kick in.” Nights and evenings are the hardest. We miss her so much. I miss her touch and her laugh. I even miss giving her her “yucky” medicine. She would get ready for bed and try to pull her socks off even in the last days when she could barely move. She would always be so proud to take her socks off. That was her special achievement.
I go in her room and lay a lot. Just smelling her smells and looking around at all her toys. I miss her, but I do know that she is not in pain anymore and it does comfort me a bit. Vince said that his hardest times are in the morning. So, I guess we hold each other up that way.
The girls are doing good. They have their moments too. Not so much “crying” moments, just moments when I can see it in their eyes that they are sad and missing their little sister. We have been keeping so busy and honestly haven’t even been home one bit. I guess some of my friends are trying to help me out in that respect. They have been swimming with some of their friends, out to eat, school shopping, bowling with some more friends, walks, playing outside, going to movies - yes, all in only a couple days. I guess I haven’t spent hardly any quality time with them this entire year, so I felt an urge to do things with them this week. They have been a bit more clingy and cuddly. They hate to see me sad, and they do here and there. But, I guess that is normal. I feel that in my head Shelbi is really telling me that it is okay and it is okay to live life. I know that she would want her sisters taken care of and happy. She loved to hear them laugh and now she can look down on them and see them smile.
It seems like the days get a little harder. I think they will get harder before the actual healing begins. We just miss her so much.
Well, one healing project that helps us is planning our upcoming ice-cream truck business which we will call “Shelbi’s Sweets and Treats.” We are so excited about this and just talking about it puts smiles on our faces. We have already started planning the board and all the committees that we need to get the business going. We will have lots of people involved with lots of different individual jobs to do. So, this will make it easier and not just one person will be doing EVERYTHING. We have even thought of the perfect people for the perfect jobs to help. We will be having a meeting on it in a month or two just to discuss ideas and share the plan. We have so many people already volunteer and want to help. I think it is going to be awesome and WILL be a success as long as we start now and work hard. We will do it and honor our little Shelbi.
Our goal with the truck will be to have the first ride - drive - be on Shelbi birthday, March 29th, rain or shine, snow or sun. This will be the ultimate birthday presents and if you know Vince and I, we go all out for birthdays! Our goal is to get a few trucks started next summer then continue and open one truck a year. We even thought that if it profits well, is a success, makes lots of money for “Give Kids the World” that we would love SOMEDAY to start trucks nationwide. Wouldn’t that be awesome. I guess it all depends on the success we have the first year. Our motto on the truck, “UNTIL WE FIND A CURE, WE WILL GIVE KIDS THE WORLD.”
Anyway, that is how we have been doing and what has been going on. I know a lot of people have been asking. We are okay. Okay, and continuing our life. Yes, it is hard. But, we will live for our Shelbi. Our beautiful little Shelbi - we will live because of her love and her inspiration!
Thanks again to everyone who has loved, cared, prayed, sent cards, gifts, phone calls, e-mails, and all the people who are keeping Shelbi’s memory alive. Thank you to those who have sent memories of Shelbi and what they remember about her. That is so special too and always brings smiles to our faces.
We love you!
