Annie's Quest

Hi to all! This Web Site has been created so that you can easily follow Annie’s daily news on her Quest for the Cure.

Annie was diagnosed on Valentine’s Day 2002 with Lymphoplasmacytic Lymphoma, which is a rare form of cancer that affects her ability to make blood. The median survival for LPL is about 5 years. In some people the disorder may be chronic with few symptoms, unlike Annie who presented her disease at a very advanced stage. She has probably had this disease for several years or more but its slow progression, (indolent), finally caught-up to her on December 17, 2001. (http://www.thedoctorsdoctor.com/diseases/lymphoma_lymphoplasmacytic.htm)


With God any Problem can be solved, as our God is a God of Miracles.
Exodus 4:6-7


HAPPY SUMMER 2004!!!!

Journal

June 6, 2005 Day Day 1032

Hia all!!
It's been awhile since we updated but life has been boring and boring is good. Annie is arranging her 3 year scans if you can believe it!!! It seems like yesterday that we were preparing for our pre BMT trip to Florida. Now we are preparing for our family reunion that takes place in Ireland on June 25th!!! It's so exciting and we cant's wait. I will get in touch after the sacn results are in this fall. Have a great summer and don't forget to thank God everyday for that one more day. He's in control and with God all things are possible. Exodus 4:6-7

Speaking of great faith I was cleaning out my office and came accross a note that written to me by my daughter Lily on Valentine's Day 2002..the date of Annie's official diagnosis. I want to share it with you now and I only wish that I could add it as a graphic.

"feb 12, 2002
Daddy I love you so much and I know this canser (sp!)is so sad but God is in control and he loves mommy I love you happy Valentine's Day. XOXOXOX
1,000,000,000. Lily

It brought tears to my eyes as I realized that our children do have faith and God has answered their faith with a resounding miracle....Our God of miracles!!!

August 12, 2004 Day 741

Deuteronomy 32 – the Song of Moses
1 Listen, O heavens, and I will speak; hear, O earth, the words of my mouth.
2 Let my teaching fall like rain and my words descend like dew, like showers on new grass, like abundant rain on tender plants. 3 I will proclaim the name of the LORD.
Oh, praise the greatness of our God! 4 He is the Rock, his works are perfect,
and all his ways are just. A faithful God who does no wrong, upright and just is he.
God is Good, God is GreatYesterday we received the confirmation from Hopkins that Annie is no longer just a Tim, but now she is also a “Ned”. Ned is the acronym for “NO EVIDENCE OF DISEASE”!!! So when you see her, just call her Ned and you will get a BIG SMILE.
It seems like yesterday but it was over two years ago when we learned the “frightening” news that Annie had cancer. Cancer is a universal word that has the same meaning to all, regardless of language, race, or creed or whether one is a Christian, Muslim or Jew, etc., or even an atheist; “FEAR”. When you first hear the word in context with you, it is the great unknown, the abyss, the quick sand, and the shark that circles beneath us only to strike us in its time without warning. No person I know is beyond fear and no person that I know has not been touched in some form or another by cancer; whether it is personal, a family member, friend, or just a poignant story that one reads or hears about another person, unbeknownst to us in the past. Yes, cancer is fear; but, FAITH conquers our fear as Faith gives us the ability to believe in an outcome that we are uncertain of, yet comforted by an innate knowledge that the outcome will be what we want it to be. Of course, any outcome is God’s Will; yet, I see nothing wrong with just having Faith that God will answer our prayers and confirm our Faith in what we are praying for. In my mind, to think otherwise is to doubt Him…Our God….THE God of Miracles.
When I read from the beginning of this journal, which has grown to over 107 pages since May 2002, and continue through today I see so much of our daily selves and what we were experiencing throughout this Quest. The mornings of waking at 4:30 AM to get ready for another day at IPOP are over, but so are the days when there was nothing in our lives except our love for each other and God; the uncertainties of life as we see it today were non-existent, at least for me, because by that time I had given all my worries to Him and all I concerned myself with was to get Annie through the day and “home” to watch another episode of Law & Order or the crazy game show, a name which escapes me, where the contestants vie against each other to win a $million dollars, and off to bed and up again tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, until that memorable day, October 6th when we finally arrived home. I still vividly remember how it felt to have the whole family at home and to climb into our bed and go to sleep.
Every once in awhile I think about loneliness, usually after reading a sad story, and recall that three week period of our lives when it was only Annie and me, going down the elevator from our apartment to the garage, driving a mile to the Weinberg Building, dropping Annie at the door and garaging the car, taking the elevator to the 5th floor and not seeing anyone other than people we didn’t really known and the medical staff, who were our only intimate partners at the time. The memories of those few weeks of isolation from all that we loved, the masks, the smell of disinfectants created a world for us, but for the love that we shared of God and each other there would have been only loneliness. Even when we were separated in daily routine or by the few crisis times we encountered neither of us was lonely as we had our Faith that God is always with us as is His Son, Jesus Christ the Great Conversationalist.
Also, after God, the most important and life saving influence for us was you, a family member, friend, or someone who didn’t know us but included us in their prayers. God heard each and every one of you and His answer to us was Ned. We firmly believe that without your Faith in God, constant prayers and love for us we would not have been able to survive with such great Peace as we have. For this we are ever so grateful and thank you with all of our heart. May God continue to Bless you and yours for eternity.
I know that you are interested in all of our friends that you met during our Journal journey, especially the Divas; well, I am extremely happy to tell you all are well and on their way to being Neds, too. Susan is having her two year checkup this month; Nancy is closing in on 18 months and as an unrelated donor transplant, she has had few experiences with GVHD and some other minor maladies but looks and feels great, Suzanne is right behind Nancy and like Annie, she has not had any life issues. All of our family is doing well, especially Annie’s mom, Yvonne, who also seems to have beat the beast and when I recently saw it never entered my mind what a tough battle she fought against her cancer with surgery and multiple radiation treatments, an their accompanying side effects; she didn’t look any different to me than when I first met her in25 years agao. The same lovely, feisty, competitive, unbelievable mom of 8!!! As for the rest of our family and friends all are a bit older today but all are doing just great. God Bless and we’ll see you this time next year, although I will update around the Christmas Holidays and as we prepare to take off next year for a family reunion of the Carroll clan in Ireland!!! Take care, continue to pray and rest assured that with God, NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE!!!

January 9, 2004 Day 524
Happy New Year!!!!
Annie’s 18 month test results again affirm that our faith in God is completely founded. I am such in awe in the way that He has worked in our lives and I feel a newly invigorated not only because of how great Annie is doing but because of so many other events that have transpired in our lives over the past two years that more than justify our belief that God’s hand is in all that we do and He has a plan for each of us. I am not trying to imply that God is only lining our days with silver as we still suffer the day to day aggravations that everyone else suffers to survive, but I think the real difference is that regardless of the aggravation or road block we have faith that God will work with us and help us get through it, which is true of His promise to us. God gave His son to us and to anyone who has children there can be no greater gift and certainly no harder gift of a parent. A parent cringes and feels pain when their child jams their thumb playing basketball, like Kyle did the other evening in a game. (Carroll County General is dedicating the “Gamber Wing” next week, I hear. It’s a bummer when everyone knows you by your first name in the ER). I can’t imagine how if must feel for a parent to see their child go off to war, like my sister did last year or a child suffers from some terrible disease, like leukemia. So, how hard would it be if you KNEW that you were sending your son to his death? This is why we have no question to our absolute faith in God keeping His promise to us to love us unconditionally like He loved His Son. I think Oswald Chambers has hit the nail on the head, explaining Belief in My Utmost For His Highest …. “Belief must come from the will to believe.”
When God begins to draw me to Himself, the problem of my will comes in immediately. Will I react positively to the truth that God has revealed? Will I come to Him? To discuss or deliberate over spiritual matters when God calls is inappropriate and disrespectful to Him. When God speaks, never discuss it with anyone as if to decide what your response may be (see Galatians 1:15-16 ). Belief is not the result of an intellectual act, but the result of an act of my will whereby I deliberately commit myself. But will I commit, placing myself completely and absolutely on God, and be willing to act solely on what He says? If I will, I will find that I am grounded on reality as certain as God’s throne.
There must be a surrender of the will, not a surrender to a persuasive or powerful argument. I must deliberately step out, placing my faith in God and in His truth. And I must place no confidence in my own works, but only in God. Trusting in my own mental understanding becomes a hindrance to complete trust in God. I must be willing to ignore and leave my feelings behind. I must will to believe. But this can never be accomplished without my forceful, determined effort to separate myself from my old ways of looking at things. I must surrender myself completely to God.
Everyone has been created with the ability to reach out beyond his own grasp. But it is God who draws me, and my relationship to Him in the first place is an inner, personal one, not an intellectual one. I come into the relationship through the miracle of God and through my own will to believe. Then I begin to get an intelligent appreciation and understanding of the wonder of the transformation in my life.

Christmas, December 25th 2003, Day 510
MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL!!! It’s our second Christmas since the transplant and the 25th since we met each other in 1979. Time flies and one cannot ever accuse us of being an unexciting family, although much of the excitement over the last several years we could have done without…that’s for sure. Since the Shingles episode in October all has gone well…PTL!!! I am back to routine working to make a living, Annie is home schooling Lily and practicing a bit of law; so far, limited to real estate closings for friends and referrals. God times it just right as when we need money to pay our bills it’s like manna from Heaven and God fulfills His promise to us. My latest internet adventure had an interesting beginning and we have over 5000 stalwart members of who support many of the conservative and family issues that we support as Christians. We actually were interviewed on CNN World News about a campaign that we launched to let people know just how evil the movie Bad Santa is and how it trashes not only Christmas tradition but the very values that are core to Christianity and Judaism. Stop in and see for yourself some time at www.laptoplobbyist.com

We had a great reunion last month with the BMT Divas at Nancy’s house. All four of our friends are doing spectacularly well. Nancy has had a few more nuisances than the rest of the Divas, probably due to her having an unrelated donor transplant, but in any event all are Blessed to be alive and doing so well.

Kyle is playing a lot of basketball as a member of the JV team at his new school St. John’s Prospect Hall. He is also doing great academically and his band Half-Halo has cut their first demo CD. Last week they played a fantastic concert at a teen Christmas party in Columbia and the band is comprised of 4 great musicians and really super young men. Sue has made us proud of him and Lily has been selling their CD’s like hotcakes, over 300 copies to date.

We are heading to Pittsburgh on Saturday for our annual Christmas visit with Annie’s family, all who are doing just great, especially Yvonne!! Another great miracle story as God delivered Yvonne from the beast and good riddance, too!! We are really looking forward to seeing everyone and will hang around until Monday after the Ravens whip the Steelers Sunday night…it would be a first for me to witness such an event.

Well, I pray that all have had as great a Christmas as we and will have a wonderful New Year and a fabulous 2004. We’ll catch up after the New Year and in the meantime we ask for your prayers about Annie’s six month scans next week and after we get the results in early January we’ll let you know how things went. I will also update some pictures on the web site, too. God Bless All!!!

Thursday, October 23, 2003 Day 447
Well the past two months have not been what we would consider “Boring” , but things have not been all that exciting either. The big news is that Annie’s new immune system just had its toughest work-out since the transplant. About two weeks ago Annie was having considerable back pain and went to see our Orthopedic Specialist and friend Melinda who diagnosed her pain as definitely from the lower back region. We figured it might be do to some stress caused by hers and Lily’s new daily exercise routine at Curves. So, a little IBproffen and rest and all would be good to go…NOT!! Last weekend the pain got really bad and the pills weren’t working so to be on the cautious side we visited Dr. Kruter. After examining Annie he concurred with Melinda’s diagnosis and sent Annie home, instructing her that she wasn’t to lift a finger for several days and pointing at me as he said Gary can take care of everything while you rest and watch tons of videos. OK, I know the drill…up early, getting the kids moving, taking Kyle on the 24 mile hike to school in the mornings, picking him up in the afternoons, cooking, cleaning, etc., etc. until last Wednesday when Annie realized that the pain wasn’t going away and in fact it had become excruciatingly intolerable and then little spots were beginning to appear on her stomach, so, off to Kruter’s office we go and guess what? She had caught a type of Chicken Pox known as “Shingles”. Shingles attacks the ganglia nerve endings in the spinal region, which is why by this time her body was screamingly painful and nothing was working. In fact, I had never seen her in such pain since the second trip to Carroll County General in January 2002, so you know we were scared. After mega dosing special drugs, applying daily pain patches and getting lots of rest the symptoms seem like they are going away and pretty much now all that is left is the original back pain diagnosed by Melinda. Because this virus is so nasty and attacks her baby immune system Annie has been staying close to home so as not to get any other maladies that could really push her into the danger zone. So we thank all of you that have been praying for us over the past several weeks and we ask that you continue to pray that Annie’s body fights off these attacks and gets back to “normal”.

On the transplant front the best news this past month was that at Annie’s 1st annual regular physical all was well and both her hemoglobin and hematocrit were NORMAL for the first time in probably 4 years. This is a blessing since it proves that the transplant has been working successfully to restore her body’s ability to make red blood cells.

All of the BMT Divas are doing well. Nancy had a bout of Shingles, too, but is now over the hump and Suzanne has had a few minor issues but for the most part all is well with the gang. We haven’t heard from Susan this month but she was doing great the last time we spoke so it appears that all four of the Divas are products of God’s Miracle Power of Healing.

The kids are all doing well and Kyle is adjusting to his new school and his band Half-Halo are beginning to do gigs in the neighborhood and will soon venture outside. They cut their first demo CD and it’s for sale for $5. Lily has been selling them at Granite and all the kids are hot for their music. (You can order one from me via email and I will ship along with a return envelope for your $5.)

Hopefully this will be the limit of our excitement for awhile and next year when they can vaccinate Annie she won’t be as susceptible to these viruses. God Bless You all and pleas continue to pry for us.


Thursday, August 21, 2003 Day 384
Guys,I am on the run but the below email says it all. We got Annie’s final results today and Dr. Flinn responded to my question after reading. Seeing that I am only an amateur part time doc and didn’t want to assume in anything so important that I actually understood the biopsy results I thought I’d ask the expert!!! Guess what? I’m not so amateurish after all. Thanks so much for your prayers and for sticking with our family during this ordeal. God Bless you all and God, THANK YOU!!!!!

From Dr. Flynn to me:
Gary,
It is good news indeed! She is tumor free!
Have a good weekend.
Ian
From me to Dr. Flinn
>>> Gamber Gary 08/21/03 11:49AM >>>
Ian
Please correct me if I have not read results properly but they look great and she has improved from 6 month tests? Thanks. Gary Ps hope you get moved this week!!
Tuesday, August 12, 2003 Day 375
Yesterday was Annie’s First Annual Checkup and God has heard your prayers and He surly has been a Blessing to our family, especially Annie. The morning began at 10 AM with Phlebotomy; where the blood draws and vitals are taken. We then rushed to meet our nurse to get prepared for the bone marrow biopsy. God again answered our prayers as Denise, Annie’s Nurse Practitioner and our Hopkins anchor spent most of the preparation time with us and we had a super prep nurse, Lynn, who took care of all of the details and gave the twilight sedation to Annie. Don, the most experienced biopsy person at Hopkins did the hard work, (well, actually Annie would rightfully disagree with this statement, but…) and everything went so smoothly it was a total reversal of the last experience and we can only thank you guys for all of your prayers. After resting a few minutes (the procedure itself only takes 15 minutes, but we were in the room for 90 minutes as Denise also did the routine physical, which saved us the extra hour later and Lynn gave her the “baby shots” to immunize against all of the childhood and adult diseases and virus that most people are inoculated for as a child. But because Annie has a new immune system (thanks to TIM) she had to start over again. After the shots and the biopsy we rushed to get the CT Scans since Annie was starving because she was not allowed to eat 8 hours beforehand. Then it was a short break for lunch and we hurried-up to wait for Dr. Flinn. Dr. Flinn had reviewed all of the preliminary results and told us that everything looks great and as he both hoped and expected; however, the biopsy results and chimerism studies won’t be back for a few days.
We learned that the CT Scans were perfect and if there were significant issues most likely they would show up on the pictures, but she was totally in normal range. PTL!!! I will post all of the final results when they are ready in about two weeks. In the meantime call Annie or post a message to let her know how happy you are. We can’t thank you enough for your faithfulness, but don’t stop the prayers.

So, we truly had a great day, although Annie's arms are a bit sore today , but as she is fond of saying…”at least I’m here to feel them” and I say “Thanks Be to God”

One other prayer request that we have concerns our friend Mary Jane, who was rushed to University Hospital over the weekend with stroke-like symptoms that turned out to be a tumor in her brain. She was operated on yesterday and survived the operation and we ask that you pray that the doctors can get the remaining tumor to shrink and die with radiation and chemo. This is a very tough road to go down and it just shows you that no matter how bad things may seem others may be struggling even more. God Bless you all and I will be posting the final First Year results as soon as they are completed.

Ps The other great news is that Annie will only return to Hopkins annually for five years and she has the option of having CT scans every six months and bi-monthly blood work, which we will probably opt to do.

Saturday, August 2, 2003 Day 365 HAPPY FIRST BIRTHDAY TO ANNIE!!!!!!!!!
“The devil is a bully, but he cannot stand for a second before God” writes Oswald Chambers in ASK. Yes, cancer is tough, but to God it is only a mere inconvenience as we have learned this past year. It’s hard to believe but just about the time we step off the plane in Tampa, Florida today one year ago Annie was getting her new marrow and what a year it has been.
I thought it would be neat to re-post several days around the actual transplant so you could relive as we are what was going on in our lives at the time. Since I last updated we have gone on a family reunion with Annie’s family at the Capacon State Park. It was a fantastic week of fun and games and our cabin was the most exciting place to be; only few came to see us. It might have been due to the fact that we were situated about 300 feet from the road, down a 45mbankment, so it was a bit of a hike that only the young and brave dared to make. In all aspects, the trip was fun and as always it was great seeing everyone. Seeing all 33 of us together at one time makes for quite a remarkable picture. You can see us in the “View Photos” section of the web site.
Yvonne is doing great and she seems to be healing marvelously. If you had bet me that she’d be back on the tennis courts again you would have won as she did just that. Cancer is no match for God, nor can it hold its own against a Carroll!!!
Please keep us in your prayers as when we return on August 11, Annie goes to Johns Hopkins for a full day of testing, including the dreaded bone marrow biopsy. Pray that the results are as expected and that she will be in little pain and discomfort. We will be staying the evening before in Baltimore at our friends’ home, Andrea and Jim, which is always a treat as they wonderfully spoil us.
All of our other BMT buddies that we write about are doing great, too, having a fine summer. For us, the next week will be beach, beach and more beach and as will be our traditional, cancer will be the furtherest from our mines. God Bless You Guys
Psalm 145: 1-2
I will exalt you, my God the King;
I will praise Your name for ever and ever.
Everyday I will praise You, and extol Your name for ever and ever.
Friday Morning, 8/2/2002 Day 0
At 5 AM this morning I jumped up out of bed and into my sweats to fetch our hero for the transplant. I promised to pick him up at 5:30 so I grabbed the paper and ran out the door. Arriving at the Wyndam Hotel at 5:15 AM I see Tim standing outside looking into the Shula’s sports bar watching ESPN. I yelled to him…”Are you crazy, you could get mugged out here in the dark. No skydiving or other stuff until after noon today.” My job would be done when I delivered the goods to the PACU unit at Hopkins, so off we went and after stopping at every green light and crosswalk we arrived at the center with 15 minutes to spare. Tim suggested that I drop him out front and I said “No No Nanette” “I am sticking with you like white on rice.” (I can’t imagine calling Annie and her mom to tell them I have lost Tim.) About 10 minutes after we got to the 3rd floor a young lady came to get him and I left for the Chinese diner on Liberty Street for coffee. I needed a place to hang out so I would not wake anyone up at the apartment until later. It’s about time to get Annie up for the Big Day. Mom is having her coffee and reading the Sunpapers and I am doing mail stuff. I will be putting an update on my voice mail around 2 PM today if you want to check in. 410-916-4316 or toll free 877-414-8152.
God Bless and PRAY, PRAY, PRAY.

A friend of ours sent me this verse last night, which I think is most appropriate for this day and everyday of our lives.

Though the fig tree should not blossom
And there be no fruit on the vines,
Though the yield of the olive should fail
And the fields produce no food,
Though the flock should be cut off from the fold
And there be no cattle in the stalls,
Yet I will exult in the LORD,
I will rejoice in the God of my salvation.
The Lord GOD is my strength,
And He has made my feet like hinds' feet,
And makes me walk on my high places.

Habakkuk 3:17-19

Saturday, 8/03/2002 -Day 1
In Psalm 27 Verse 14 we are told to wait on the Lord as it is He who determines what will happen to us and when our lives will change. We have waited for a long time for this day, (at least in our minds), and He changed our lives yesterday with the gift of life from Tim. As I watched Annie being infused I felt that I was in the presence of an Awesome God and I was. My worries are over and I know that He is in control. Now we have to wait on Him and when it is His time Annie will be cured. I wish you could have been with us when Tim and Annie met for the first time after the transplant. The picture doesn’t come near to capturing the emotions that passed from brother to sister with mom and me looking on. They talk about this day being anticlimactic but I assure you that it was anything but. God Bless Tim!

Now we are again waiting on our Lord to do His work and in the meantime lots of things went on. Annie was being infused with a new antibiotic Vancomycin along with her Cyclosporine, (which by the way is over for high dose infusion after Sunday (YEA!)), A few minutes after the drip began Annie started itching like a monkey in the window and red splotches literally raced across her body. It was really weird, but we didn’t panic and I calmly looked up drug reactions in my book and came across “Red Man (Person) Syndrome”. Well, she sure looked like a red woman to me and our trusty nurse didn’t wait for the young Fellow, but immediately loaded a syringe with Benadryl and shot it into Annie’s Hickman. The plunger wasn’t even halfway in when the red started to recede and she was back to normal accepting for some fat hands. Yvette, our new Fellow (Fellowess?) looked at the situation and said to Annie “You had Redman Syndrome” I almost burst out laughing when I looked at Sallie, who had already cured the anomaly, and saw her role her us and mumble “another newbie”, but even the doctors admit that it is the nurses who run the hospital and deal with the problems. I am already imaging the first words out of Dr. Jones’ mouth on Monday, who is in Ocean City this weekend with his family, “So…..you had Redman’s Syndrome….folks, trust me, it’s the Sallies of this world who will save you. I also couldn’t help to think that God designed our bodies to be drug free and that is why we have such reactions when the body is invaded by something new. It’s so very complex and I wonder how anyone can not believe that we have a Creator. The human body is so cool!!! If I were a bit brighter and 20 years younger I would go to medical school and become a researcher, but…. The rest of the seven days for Vancomycin will be administered with a tandem shot of Benadryl, which will keep Annie from itching, but will also make her groggy. Groggy is probably better than boring for the most part as the time whisks away without awareness of the time.

We met the superstar of allogeneic transplants yesterday who countered all of the horror stories with her own. She looked to be about 48 and had a brother donor transfusion on July 19th . On July 22nd she engrafted and was RELEASED to outpatient status in 13 days!! She had a bit of sore throat and some slight mucositis, but that’s it. Now Annie knows that not everyone has to have a nightmare transplant, which made her feel good. However, everyone is different and this is not a contest, so God will give what He will give to Annie and He will not give her more than she can handle. It’s His promise.

After the Redman Syndrome was solved I rushed off to mom’s to fetch Lily and then we scooted up to New Windsor to pick up Kyle so we could have a family night before the kids leave with Grammy for Pittsburgh and then to Ohio with Aunt Amy. We had a fun evening and just after I changed the bed linens Lily jumped in with her street clothes on. Dad did not think this as funny as she did, but I had missed her so much that I did not even care. (Annie no longer has an immune system as her counts bottomed out this morning which is fabulous news since we thought she’d hold out until next Thursday. This means that the only way now is UP and…..Hereeeeeeeeeesssssssssssssssssss to Tim and engraftment.
Annie, Lily, and I ended up in the king-size bed with Kyle and Grammy in the other room. It was great seeing the kids and Annie was feeling great.

God Bless and keep praying….IT REALLY WORKS!!

Our Prayers:
GIVE THANKS FOR HOW GOD HAS CALMED THE WATERS FOR US THOUGH THIS STORM AND HAS MADE IT POSSIBLE FOR ANNIE TO BE CURED!!!!!
GIVE THANKS FOR OUR HERO, TIM!!!!!
GIVE THANKS FOR OUR FAMILY AND FOR YOURSELVES because without you talking to God He may not have had such an open ear.
That we come to know God more and more.
That our family is protected during our time apart.
That Annie experiences little Graft versus Host, but does get a Graft versus Lymphoma
That Annie experiences limited side effects from all of the treatment
That Annie will be protected from fever and infection
That we will have the resources to see this thing through without worry
That Bamboo Solutions will survive and prosper
That Annie will be CURED and we can go on with life and do His Work.

Saturday, July 12, 2003, Day 344 (Time Flies)
Life is about regaining control. Over the past several months that is what our lives have been about; regaining control. I especially have found myself struggling to overcome my tendency to try to control my life through the lives of others, whether it is Annie, the kids, business partners, etc. . . . I just felt so out of control of my own life that I had to try to control others. Thankfully, before everything totally unraveled I realized that the one who needs to be in control is God and I must give everything back to Him if I have any hope of regaining my life; so, I have begun to repair the distancing from Him that occurs when we try to do it all ourselves, something that I should have learned well over the past year during our family trials. I guess that’s the humanness of my being. Oswald Chambers wrote in Baffled, “A certain type of modern science would have us to believe that we can harness the sea and air and earth. Quite true, you can, if you only read scientific manuals and deal with successful experiments; but before long you discover elements which knock all of your calculations on the head and prove that the universe is wild and unmanageable. And yet in the beginning God intended man to control it; the reason he cannot is because he twisted God’s order; instead of recognizing God’s dominion over himself, man became his own god, and by doing so lost control of everything else. God says it cannot be done”. And do you want to know something? He’s right... (See Genesis, Chapter 3)

When I look at Annie today it’s hard to believe that she has been sick for even a day of her life. I have just about forgotten all that has transpired over the past year and just how ill she was before God blessed us with a miracle. This past week she was at Camp Tohiglo, helping take care of her share of over 100 campers and counselors. Every morning she was up at the crack of dawn and down to the cafeteria to ready the place for its daily onslaught of hungry campers and staff. She did this for all three meals and with Kyle and Lily also being at camp as teen counselors they had a wonderful time together (as I stayed home for the most part to take care of Skittles and business); apart from a few showers that week was almost perfect; that is, except that the first night, which she spent with Kyle at Waynesboro hospital after he re-injured his ankle, which he had broken around Memorial Day playing basketball. So after a few x-rays and consultation back to camp they went and the remainder of the week was filled with uneventful fun. Kyle was teaching the little kids how to shoot BB guns and he got a kick out of simultaneously pulling his trigger as his protégé shot his gun, shooting the target and letting the little ones think they hit the bull’s-eye. Lily was busy teaching compass reading and doing crafts with the little ones, who were all around 7 years old.

This has been a month of miracles for several of our friends. Lys, who was six months pregnant with Jordan and battling a ferocious leukemia without taking therapy, finally hit the wall…it was either take chemotherapy or risk dying and taking Jordan with her. I can’t imagine her anguish is such a Sophie’s Choice situation, but she finally succumbed and as we all prayed the drugs got her in remission and the doctors were able to perform an emergency c-section and all 5’7oz. Of Jordan sprang out and she was in such great shape that they didn’t even put her in the ICU and Liz was finally able to take the heavy duty pain killers and gain relief. I heard yesterday that both she and the baby may be going home on Monday, what a miracle this is. Lys has asked that we thank all who have been praying for her and Jordan and she asks that we continue to pray that she stays in remission and that she will be able to undergo a transplant in the fall!!!

Yesterday, Marvin, the father of our good friend Donna “Zoë” Smith cam through an
operation that his doctors advised would only occur by a miracle. Donna called all of her friends and got the prayer chains in action and Marvin came through the very serious operation and now we are praying that they will be able to take him off the respirator and he will resume breathing on his own.

On Thursday, our newest friend Rick, 41, underwent his transplant at Hopkins. His mother, Arlene, has asked for our prayers and it appears that the transplant has gone well and not Rick is in the emotional waiting game for his counts to rise. Please pray for him and Arlene as they face this ordeal as well as for the wisdom of his doctors and nurses. It is truly a scary time in one’s life, but we will pray that Rick will have his miracle, too.

The BMT Divas from Carroll County Cancer Center, (Annie, Nancy and Suzanne) had a great 4 hour lunch at Ruby Tuesdays. They even added a guy to the group who had his transplant a little over a year ago. He’s a pathologist in a local hospital and is doing great as are the Divas. (We don’t know what he should be called? Perhaps he’s a Dava?) Susan joined the group for lunch and she is doing so well she actually took a part time job originating mortgages. We always thought of her as a toughie and she surely has proven us right. It is so great that God has been so good to us all, we sometimes tend to forget about those who don’t do as well, but we do pray for them all and prayers work!!

We all are very excited that we will be spending time with Annie’s mom, Yvonne, herself recently battling a cancer of the throat. She is doing very well after having so many weeks of harsh radiation and chemotherapy. I am not sure if she’s back on Center Court as yet, smashing aces against unsuspecting younger players, but I wouldn’t be too surprised if we see her with a racket in hand sometime next week. She is an amazing lady and a tough fighter. We have all been praying hard for her and the prayers have been heard and God is healing her from this terrible beast.
On Monday we are off to a week’s family vacation in Berkley Springs, WVA, which is about 2 hours west of our home. We will be joined by Annie’s entire family…about 33 folks and we have rented 9 or 10 cabins where we will be staying for the week in the Capacon Mountains. I am told there is no cell phone service, so it’s going to be a long week for me, but I’ll just have to adjust and have fun!!! No cell phone service is something foreign to me. Even when I went on my missions’ trip to Kyrgyzstan in 2000 I was able to stand at the top of the mountain, looking over to Afghanistan, and calling home on my Nextel…so, Berkley Springs is even more remote? Tonight Paul, Kim and the kids land at BWI from their Lake Tahoe home and they will stay with us until we all leave on Monday. I think they a planning a day trip to Gettysburg for Sunday, as it is so close to us. I doubt that we will join them, but Gettysburg is an awesome place.

Praise God! Annie’s counts have been stable and after a little nervousness earlier in the month over some liver enzyme numbers things are back to normal. Her HgB and HCT has been at normal for a month, which is probably the first time that has occurred in several years, so it seems that all of the red meat that she is now eating is doing a good job at boosting her red cell production. In fact, she seems to enjoy a good steak once a week. Her annual 1 year checkup has been set for August 11th at Johns Hopkins and hopefully we’ll get to see many of our old nursing buddies while we spend the day getting poked and prodded.

God Bless all and I’ll let you know how the trip went when we get back. Keep us in your prayers.

Monday, May 26, 2003, Day 297 (Every Day is a Milestone)
“Remember the Word to Your servant, Upon which You have caused me to hope.
This is my comfort in my affliction, For Your word has given me life.
The proud have me in great derision, YET I do not turn aside from Your law.
I remembered Your judgments of old, O Lord, And have comforted myself.
Indignation has take hold of me Because of the wicked, who forsake Your law.
Your statutes have been my songs In the house of my pilgrimage.
I remember Your name in the night, O Lord, And I keep Your law.
This has become mine, Because I kept Your precepts.” (Psalm 119:49-56)
“Almighty God is nothing but an abstraction unless He becomes concrete and actual” (Oswald Chambers “Baffled”)
The daily struggle that I think we all have, at least I know I do, is to keep God in perspective in our lives, which we can only do through the realization that He isn’t a perspective but rather He is our life. God isn’t just here when calamity strikes or in times of joy, or when nothing much is happening and we are just sitting around in boredom; He is here always, in every little way, in every breath we take. He anoints us with a Great Counselor, the Holy Spirit, who is with us no matter where we are, continually speaking to us when we talk to Him, and always speaking to us even when we don’t ask Him. When I make a decision it is He who is guiding me and telling me what’s right and what’s not, thank God! God gives us Hope, just as the Psalmist laments. It is this Hope that gives us comfort and it is His Spirit that we must listen so that we in fact can keep His law, because that’s all He ask of us. Keep His Commandments and love one another. I don’t think it’s asking too much of us, because if it weren’t for His Love for us and His Will, we wouldn’t be here today and that is His gift to us…life. And when we accept His Son Jesus as our savior then He gives that life for eternity. I think it is this Promise that He makes to us that keep us going in our darkest days during this past year, and it is His covenant that should keep us going even on the best of days. God is real and He is here with us everyday so don’t try to make Him out to be an idea. Praise God for His Mercy and His love!

The days used to go by quickly, but now the months fly, too. For the most part May has been a boring lackadaisical month and I’m not complaining, either. Some of the highlights included a trip to Yardley, Pennsylvania on Mother’s Day to celebrate our nephew Matthew’s First Holy Communion. Matthew is Tim’s and Kim’s oldest son and of course you all remember our donor Hero was named Tim. Yes, it is he. Unlike this icky Memorial Day weekend, Mother’s Day weekend was great and it was made even greater by the fact that Yvonne, Annie’s mom, was able to make the trip from Pittsburgh via our house for a couple of nights, too. Yvonne is looking great and her voice seems as if it’s getting back to normal since the radiation treatments have ended and day by day she is becoming stronger and more like she was before being stricken with cancer. We praise God for this and all of our family and friends who have prayed so hard and continue to pray for her recovery. We are looking forward to our bi-annual family reunion in Berkeley Springs in July, when the entire Carroll clan and their respective families will occupy 6 or 7 rustic cabins in the park. If I am counting right there will be 33 of us this year!!! Other exciting things that happened this month included Kyle’s first sports injury, a broken ankle bone that ended his lacrosse season for the year, much to the chagrin of his coach. He should be able to get a few more weeks of basketball in for the summer after Dr. Blue releases him on June 11. New week is Lily’s big day as she will be 12 on the “real” Memorial Day, May 31st. I don’t know what she has planned for this big day but knowing Lil like I do it will be a fun time for all with one of mom’s great ice cream cake, made with Oreo cookies, Heath Bars, and Byers Ice Cream!!! Annie always hides the Heath Bars from me and it’s a game we play I think to see if I can figure out where and eat them all be for the next party. She thinks she is so sly; some of the places are really creative. She’ll find out on May 30th that she’ll just have to find a little better place…perhaps in Milwaukee.

Well, it’s getting late in the morning so we better get down to business. Annie’s counts are steady but have fluctuated a little from April. There is nothing to be concerned about as this is just the way it is with her. Dr. Kruter told her not to come back until after her 1 year check-up, which is scheduled for August 11th. And her blood work has been reduced to monthly, which is why I am only updating her web site monthly. One interesting fact about her 1st annual checkup is that she will get re-vaccinated for all of those childhood diseases; measles, mumps, small pox, polio, etc. since her immune system is like that of a baby…only 1 year old. It’s amazing and we have also been so Blessed by Johns Hopkins and all of our care givers. What a great institution to have in our own back yard.

As for the BMT Diva club. Annie, Suzanne, and Nancy met for brunch last week and spent hours together just loving life. All of the girls are doing just great and like Annie they are beginning to get their lives back in order. Joe and I spoke the other day and Susan, the miracle from Olney is doing fantastic and has actually been out on the golf course hitting balls. Like Joe told me months back when we though Susan might not pull out of her tailspin…”They don’t know Susan…she’s one tough hombre” I am a believer.

Also, Johns Hopkins referred a new patient to us who is undergoing a BMT beginning next week, and she is doing it as a true out-patient. I would like you to include Vivian and her family in your prayers that all will go well and that it be God’ Will to cure her of her cancer. I know they will appreciate knowing that they are being prayed for.

Thanks for all of your prayers and support and we’ll be looking forward to seeing you all at Annie’s 1st Re-Birthday party that we will be throwing for some time in August…so stay tuned, keep praying for us, and God Bless you all real good!!!

Wednesday, April 29, 2003 Day 270
I learned an interesting fact last night from a gentleman who worked for George Bush, Sr. when he was President and during that time came to know our current President George W. Bush. He told me that George W. is a methodical man who has an extreme understanding of who is, where he needs to go, and how he will get there; in all respects he is a leader, which I think that past two years readily supports this statement. What I did not know that as part of his methodical nature he is a voracious reader of daily scripture and Oswald Chambers. For those of you who have followed Annie’s Quest over the last nine months you have been acquainted with the writings of Oswald Chambers, as he is the person who I went to during our time of crisis in order to gain a better understanding of God’s word. George W. Bush read Oswald Chambers’ most famous work, “My Utmost for His Highest”. Having learned this tidbit, which I have since confirmed, I know realize why our President has been so successful in his efforts to lead our Nation and so completely un-intimidated by written words of man; it is because he is leading us “Under God”, through the Word and Jesus Christ. The following will give you goose bumps, as it truly puts our President and his love of God and Country in total perspective, from the reading from Oswald Chambers “My Utmost for His Highest”, July 6th.

“VISION and REALITY”
"And the parched ground shall become a pool." Isaiah 35:7
“We always have visions, before a thing is made real. When we realize that although the vision is real, it is not real in us, then is the time that Satan comes in with his temptations, and we are apt to say it is no use to go on. Instead of the vision becoming real, there has come the valley of humiliation.
"Life is not as idle ore,
But iron dug from central gloom,
And batter'd by the shocks of doom
To shape and use."
God gives us the vision, then He takes us down to the valley to batter us into the shape of the vision, and it is in the valley that so many of us faint and give way. Every vision will be made real if we will have patience. Think of the enormous leisure of God! He is never in a hurry. We are always in such a frantic hurry. In the light of the glory of the vision we go forth to do things, but the vision is not real in us yet; and God has to take us into the valley, and put us through fires and floods to batter us into shape, until we get to the place where He can trust us with the veritable reality. Ever since we had the vision God has been at work, getting us into the shape of the ideal, and over and over again we escape from His hand and try to batter ourselves into our own shape.
The vision is not a castle in the air, but a vision of what God wants you to be. Let Him put you on His wheel and whirl you as He likes, and as sure as God is God and you are you, you will turn out exactly in accordance with the vision. Don't lose heart in the process. If you have ever had the vision of God, you may try as you like to be satisfied on a lower level, but God will never let you.”
After reading this I know George W. Bush, Jr. is a student of both the Word and of Oswald Chambers; what better summary can be found for how our President leads us into battle.
God sure took our family down to the valley and battered us around a bit this past year, and although we tend to allow ourselves to sink to the bottom, enjoying our lives in spiritual mediocrity, racing to go everywhere but not getting anywhere, the reality is that God won’t let us drown. He won’t let us live leisurely at the bottom, but will constantly raise us up and gives us another chance to achieve His vision for our lives. Thank God that He is a patient God as we struggle to do it ourselves, time and again facing the reality that we can’t!!
As we normalize in our family; me back to working everyday, Annie doing more and more everyday; in fact, doing almost everything that she did before 2/14..and more. The kids doing kid’s stuff and school like before and for the most part we have been saved by Him, once again and delivered from the valley. Our family vision is to become closer to Him, read His Word daily, and emulate His Son who died for us so that we will all live together in eternity; the reality is that it is a daily struggle between God and Satan, between rushing our desires and patience; but, we know that God will not give up on us in the same way that we know that He will not give up on our President or our Country. We must not give up supporting him in the battle against evil, so he can achieve his vision for all of us, which in reality is God’s vision, too.
Annie’s numbers this month are very boring to the doctors and nurse who monitor her and you know BORING IS GREAT!!!! CBC numbers are slightly below normal, but the metabolic numbers are right-on. Praise God, too, that Nancy, Susan, and Susanne are all leading very boring lives, too, post BMT. Please complete praying that we will continue to lead such boring lives and that we will achieve His Vision and Reality in our family.
Praise God and Annie’s mom has finished her treatments and is getting stronger everyday. Annie and Jen will be traveling this weekend to Pittsburgh to keep their mom company and we ask for your prayers for their protection and a good visit. On behalf of Annie and Yvonne’s entire family we thank you for your faithfulness.
Also, we must all pray for Elys, who is struggling through her pregnancy with baby Jordan. She needs to go seven more weeks before her Lymphoma can be treated and Jordan safely delivered. Elys is totally trusting God in an ultimate form of patience. To protect Jordan she has refused all treatment, and must live off of transfusions, an extremely dangerous strategy for her, but one that will better ensure that Jordan lives. Transfusions impact the body’s ability to engraft properly and each transfusion raises Elys’ risk one more notch. Please pray for her and for God’s Grace. Give her comfort as she waits patiently for HIM. God Bless you all and we’ll be back in



Tuesday, April 1, 2003, Day 242
NO APRIL FOOL’s Day TODAY in the Gamber household!!! We just received Annie’s lab results and her counts were near normal across the board….WBC of 4000!!! What a show-off she is as our friend Kelly says and what a Blessing this is as it truly affirms our faith in God’s love. He has heard and continues to listen to all of your prayers.

Also, we really need to thank everyone for their prayers and concerns about Annie’s mom, Yvonne, who is now home from the hospital and getting stronger by the day. Yvonne has about 5-7 more treatments and then she will be back on the tennis court. She is also battling a blood clot in her leg, which can be quite dangerous. She is getting a daily shot to dissolve that and we ask that you pray for it to leave her body as quickly as it came. Annie spent the week before last with her mom, overlapping a day with Paul Carroll. Chuck and Jen arrived on Friday for the weekend and Tim, our wonderful life giving brother donor checks into the Pittsburgh Carroll Hilton on Thursday for a few days. We are so Blessed that sisters’ Martha and Katy leave nearby and are always around to lend a helping hand. God knew what was going to happen when Katy took off for sabbatical to get her PhD. Please pray for Katy as its triple duty with school, mom, and her own life, but what a Blessing she has been. Martha and Katy keep us posted almost daily and especially when significant events occur.

It has been a busy two weeks and this news has just overwhelmed us with joy. Annie has had so few medical issues since her transplant, and the more I read of others’ plights, I realize just how Blessed we are. Please continue to pray for all of those, especially the children that have been besieged by this beast of a disease. Pray that God will give great wisdom to all of the doctors and medical folks that are dedicating their lives to the Cure. It seems that everyday treatment and man’s knowledge get a little stronger and we pray that one day God will open that door and rid the world of Cancer, which is striking more and more people daily, destroying families and friendships.

On Saturday we had a lovely dinner with Joe and Susan at the Inn at Brookeville Farms in Olney, Maryland. Susan is doing just great and raring to get back to work and Joe is getting on with life, too. We were all talking about how much different our lives are because of all of the prayers that were said and the faith that was forged over the past year around the world for both women. Susan’s doctor told her she “came back from the dead and is truly a Miracle”. We continue to pray for each other. On another front; Nancy is home from her transplant and she and Annie got together last week. They are two of the Diva BMT trio from Dr. Kruter’s office at Carroll County Cancer Center. Suzanne is doing great, too; although, we have not heard from her in about two weeks the word on the street is that she is or will be home shortly. It seems as if God is producing many Miracles in Carroll County!!!

A friend has just written a book about her experience as well as the how to deal with all of the peripheral matters in a life threatening disease. Better described as practical tips for living with a life-threatening disease. A guide to taking care of yourself. It title is “Not Just a Patient - How to Have a Life When You Have a Life-Threatening Disease “ by Ellen Fein (54 pages; perfect bound; catalogue #03-0223; ISBN 1-55395-860-8; US$10.95 (Can$15.95)). Ellen is a BMT survivor, with AML, who was married to Michael Goldfinger, who also had AML, but did not survive his transplant. Ellen is a warm and fascinating person who was of great help and inspiration to Annie and me throughout our journey. She has a great web site and it’s a wonderful story that she tells, even through the sadness of such a great loss to her and her daughter Becky when Michael passed away. I encourage all to read her book and it would make a wonderful gift for anyone who is facing a life threatening disease, even if it’s other than cancer. Her web site is http://www.geocities.com/ellenfeinwebsite/
God Bless you all and Annie’s next blood draw is not for three weeks so we’ll see you around the end of April. Take care.

Friday, March 14, 2003, Day 224
Folks, not much news to update concerning Annie only to say she is doing spectacularly well. PTL. The only medical stuff that went on is that her routine (YEAH!!) exam by Dr. Kruter last week went great and her metabolic panel looks fine and all ratings are normal. She is still hovering around the 2000 WBC range, but the most important granulocytes and platelets are great. Her hair is growing so swiftly that soon I will need to break down and buy her a new blow dryer. She is off all drugs except one, which is scheduled to stop later this month. Her next checkup isn’t until May!!! I did want to take a few minutes and update everyone on other friends and family members who are in similar situations.

First of all, Annie’s mom, Yvonne, is still struggling with her treatments and her side effects and lack of appetite and ability to eat gave her a trip to the hospital for four days thius week. She is now home and somewhat stabilized, but has been really impacted with mouth sores and weight loss. The hospital has solved the weight loss with supplements (canned drinks) and she will be half way through her treatments this week so we are asking for intense pray that the remaining weeks are uphill all the way. Katy and Martha are bearing the brunt of helping out and keeping the rest of us up to date on progress. Everyone else lives in other parts of the country; however, the family has rallied together and the tag team starts today with the arrival of Amy and Emma from Columbus, who will stay with mom for several days and then Paul will arrive from Lake Tahoe for a stay which will be overlapped by Annie as she heads to Pittsburg (driving herself!!!) from New Windsor on Wednesday for the balance of the week. The following week Minneapolis Chuck and DC Jen will arrive to share some of the responsibilities with Charlie, and I know that Tim is probably planning to fill in some of the gaps as he clears his busy schedule with the Journal. So…mom is getting great support form the family just like we got last year. Having 8 great kids really paid off.

Our friend Susan just called with her perfect 100esults and she is soaring high. I think back a few months when we were worried that she wasn’t going to walk out of the hospital, let alone hitting golf balls like she and Joe did last week. We’re having dinner with Joe and Susan at the Inn at Brookeville in several weeks to celebrate our six month anniversary. What a great meal this will be. Annie spent most of Wednesday with our friend Nancy who was just released to come home after her transplant 80 days ago. She actually came home much quicker than was initially anticipated, especially considering the shutdown of her kidneys for several weeks of dialysis. God heard our prayer, fix things and sent her home to Neal and the kids. Suzanne, the third member of the Carroll County BMT Divas is still at Hopkins but may be coming home early next week and she is doing just fantastically and has had very little side effects at all. We can’t wait to see her and get the diva club activities organized and rolling. God has truly been faithful to us all as have you and we thank you for all of your prayers, thoughts, and helping hands. We couldn’t have done it without you. God Bless


Monday, March 3, 2003, Day 213
Today, another milestone was reached!!! Annie's Port-a-Cath was removed during in-patient surgery today and although it was a bit uncomfortable, she is doing just fine. It's such a relief to know that all of this is behind us now and this morning she actually went back to her 6 AM routine of getting the kids off to Granite, including handling carpool. Wow, I thought I was dreaming. God has surely been good to us and we thank everyone for their prayers and kindness. See you same time next week. God Bless.

Thursday, February 27, 2003, Day 209
THE RESULTS ARE IN!!! Well, it seems I am married to Tim now all 100N0T. Just kidding but oh how we are so blessed. Annie's biopsy results show 100onor marrow and given only the 5esidual lymphoma, her new immune system should completely take over and destroy all of the bad guys. Thanks so much for your prayers and I will write more later when we get back home. Things are going great in Annapolis and Kyle had his picture taken with the Lt. Governor, Michael Steele yesterday. The Governor was too upset to join in the festivities of TeenPact as he was getting beat-up pretty harshly over the slots and when he exited the legislative chamber Kyle said he was not a happy camper. God Bless all and please pray hard for Annie's mom, Yvonne, as the radiation has really taken its toll on her body. She is not able to talk or eat for now, so please pray that things will get better and that her cancer will be destroyed. Have a great weekend and for those of you in my neighborhood...enjoy the new snow. Yuk!!

Monday, February 24, 2003, Day 206
Hi all! Just a brief update from down south in Annapolis, Maryland, where we will be staying at or friend Celeste and her daughter Brooke’s new home this week while Kyle attends Teen Pact. Teen Pact is a really cool program that gives kids the opportunity to get a bird’s eye view of our legislature in action. He will spend the next four days learning about the inner workings of our state government, meeting the legislatures and coming away with a total understanding of what goes on every year for 90 days in operating the government. Yesterday he was writing his own bills to introduce and reviewing other bills that are winding their way through the process of becoming law or just another bill that died somewhere along the way. On Friday Kyle will spend the day in a public speaking class , which I think he is looking forward too as he really enjoys debating. Who knows twenty years from now he could be banging the gavel and driving and killing bills himself.

Last week was a week of great news, as we all began to unbury ourselves from under the big white blanket. First of all we heard from Dr, Flinn, who had the results from one of the most important tests from Annie’s bone marrow biopsy. After the analysis was done all that is left in Annie’s marrow is about a 5ymphoma residue. This is not uncommon and certainly is a world apart from when it was 60Dr. Flinn feels that over the next year or so Annie’s new immune system will gradually eliminate the entire residue, so for now it will just be “watch and wait” (but not worry). He also said any treatment that could be done now to try to hasten the demise of the residue would be more dangerous than the cancer cells themselves. If fact, we all have these types of cells it’s just with normal immune systems the body cleans them up and keeps them from taking over. The second half of the test, Chimerism, isn’t back as yet, which will tell us the percentage of donor marrow that is Tim’s and like last time we’re praying for 100Hopefully I will be able to report these results in the next several days.

Yvonne has been doing great with her radiation and chemo treatments. A bit tired and some minor side effects, but your prayers have certainly been felt and we thank you for your faithfulness. Her biggest complaint is that her Pic line keeps her off the tennis court for now, but watch out in about 6 weeks as she'll be back kicking up the clay.

The next piece of great news was that Kyle has been accepted for the class of 2007 at St. John’s Literary Institute at Prospect Hall in Frederick, where he will spend the next four years getting ready for college and playing lots of basketball and lacrosse. He is most excited and so are we as he transitions fro home school to a regular high school program. We still haven’t decided what Lily will be doing next year but are leaning to having her back in Granite.

It’s a bit strange living a “normal” life again after so many months living one of “what is today going to bring”, but that’s what we are doing…living a boring, mundane, every day life and that is good by us. God has been so faithful and after relying upon Him so much there is a tendency that when all goes well we forget about His every second influence on our lives. I am trying not to do that, but as I get wrapped-up in “living” I seem to be forgetting more about life itself with God in complete control. So, I am trying to move back closer to where God is at the center of all that I do, so please pray that this will happen. There is at least one thing that I learned over the past year and that is that God does a much better job of managing my life than I do, so I really want to let him continue to do just that. I want to get to where Oswald describes as the plateau of God, where our relationship doesn’t peak but enlarges, “giving us ample room to grow and live”. Jesus tells us not to let our hearts be troubled and He will give us peace; It is this peace that I aspire to achieve. Please pray for me and our family. In Psalm 32:6 the psalmist writes; “You are my hiding place; You shall preserve me from trouble; You shall surround me with songs of deliverance.” God is good and God Bless You All.

Tuesday, February 18, 2003, Day 200
Well we survived Lymphoma, a BMT, a six month checkup and bone marrow biopsy, and dealing with insurance companies but these past several days really tested our true survivorship capabilities as 9 teenagers have been stranded at our place since the snow began. After eating everything in sight, staying up jamming until all hours, and frolicking in the snow, finally today all were gone and now it’s just Annie, me, and Kyle getting set to watch an old flick as we wind down. Actually, we all had a blast, but I have come to realize my age. I cannot imagine how Annie’s parents with 8 kids and mine with only 6 were able to reach the age of social security, just feeding everyone. Truly an awesome time as we celebrated Kyle’s 14th birthday in great style, especially the event of the century, 27 inches of snow outside; the second biggest snowstorm in Maryland history. This is one birthday he will never forget and neither will we.

I just wanted all to know that due to the snow the 6 month lab results are a bit behind and should be in by Monday. Keep praying, stay warm, and watch the old back as you lift the snow. God Bless!

Friday, February 14, 2003, Day 196 Happy Valentine’s Day!!!!
One year ago today we sat in front of Dr. Kruter when he explained to us that Annie had a very advanced form of blood cancer. He gave us no option, only that we had to begin chemotherapy almost immediately, which we did the next week after having Annie’s port installed. Neither of us knew what to expect. We couldn’t even spell the disease she had and knew nothing about chemotherapy, cancer, or bone marrow transplants. All we knew was that we had each other, our children, our family, and our friends, and most importantly we had God. We knew He would see us through this crisis and that His will would be done, so we prepared ourselves to face each day one day at a time. We prayed for a miracle and asked each of you to pray for us too, and you did. God has shown us the miracle, as Annie is well today. Soon we will have the test results that will affirm our faith. Thanks for being with us every day for last 365 days. Thanks for all of your hearts. What an appropriate day to celebrate our faith and God’s love in our hearts. God Bless You and Happy Valentine’s Day 2003!!!!
Ps I am posting some new pictures from Christmas 2002. Take a peak.


Friday, February 07, 2003, Day 189
“Oh What a Day” it was yesterday and thank God that He was with us. It was really a stressful time for me so you can imagine how hard it was on Annie, but; in His Grace, He gave great news and we expect that His miracle will be confirmed sometime next week when all of the results are back. It all began at 6AM, when I goy upon and started getting the day in order, first with Him and then with all of the administrative stuff. Annie did not sleep well so I let her sleep to the last possible minute before we had to leave. Since she was not allowed to eat anything due to anesthesia, and the hair thing isn’t your everyday blow dry ordeal (but it’s getting close!!!), we were up and out shortly after she awakened.

Then it was off to my mom’s to drop Kyle and Lily and on to Hopkins. After the usual check-in and an unusual acknowledgement by the receptionist of the largest clinic at Hopkins we waited for the phlebotomy nurse to arrive. Unbelievably, the receptionist not only remembered Annie and me, but she also had a fond recollection of Tim, who she only saw dashing around a few times in the clinic. She recalled the game, “Gotcha Last” that we were playing in July before the transplant!!!

The next item as always (and I am sure you know the drill by now) is a blood draw. Afterwards we did a bone density scan, which was really cool, to see if Annie will be a candidate for Osteoporosis (I spelled this right so you know I have spent too much time in hospitals). We didn’t get the actual results but we did find out later the hard way that the results will be great! Then we met with Annie’s nurse practitioner, Janice, who took over for Denise. Denise is only working Monday’s through Wednesday’s now. After doing the Q&A and physical we moved to the next room for the bone marrow biopsy, where we learned that the $500 for the density scan was a worthless expense. Because the last biopsy was so hard Annie elected to have conscious sedation this time, which we learned as with the Dentist doesn’t work well for her. So, she was really aware for the entire procedure. Well, to cut to the chase, Janice is about 4’7” and weighs in at no more than 90 pounds. She was unable to get through Annie’s dense bones and it because a Keystone Cop Nightmare. I almost jumped in to assist, but felt by doing so Annie would really loose it…again; God saved us, because Terry was next door and rushed-in to save the day. I was totally horrified that Janice would have to stop the procedure and we’d have to come back another day, in which case I think Annie would have had to be handcuffed!!! Janice was totally mortified, I was beside my self, and after it was finally over I am sure Terry had to go to physical therapy to revive her arms, which looked as if they had been broken in a battle with Mike Tyson. Forget ever ready about HRT and Osteoporosis (did it right again) in Annie’s lifetime as the Carroll bones must be like steel. The memory was so bad last night that Annie wasn’t able to get to sleep as she was worrying about the next BMB. But, again in God’s Grace we Terry was able to get the right specimen for pathology, unlike the last biopsy, which failed, so that was quite a relief for all and we are looking for great results.

After that trauma, things calmed down and she did what we thought would be an easy, routine CT scan…NOT…as her IV line blew out and had to be replaced after drenching the nurses with coconut juice or whatever they put into those things for contrast. Finally, Annie was able to eat and after an hour or two of waiting we met Dr. Flinn. He is tickled at Annie’s progress and all of the results from the tests that he had, including the CT wet reads were excellent…PTL!!!! We asked 29 questions and he gave us 30 answers about what we should and should not do for the next six months. He did say that after 1 year, August 2, 2003, Annie should be back to doing just about everything and maybe even more than she did before. Thank God for Hopkins and thank God for Dr. Flinn, and thank God for all of you who have been so faithful. Since Dr. Flinn stopped Annie’s weekly blood draws in favor of every three weeks, I will report back at the end of next week when we expect to get the Chimerism (is Annie still Tim and if so how much. 80s good but 100s better…in bone marrow, that is. Don’t get me wrong I love Tim, but I hear that he is a snorer!!), as well as the biopsy results and cancer restaging. Love you all!!!



Wednesday, January 29, 2003, Day 180!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
It was truly a wonderful event that occurred this evening at 11:00PM; Annie took her last Cyclosporine pill, (you remember that one; it smells like a horse and is big enough to choke one, too…and Annie had to gulp down 6 every day or roughly 800 of the nasty capsules since Day 10), so tomorrow she become drug free!!! It’s really hard to comprehend that it has been six months since her transplant day, as time has slipped so quickly by, but time can keep slipping for us for many years to come.

We celebrated this milestone by using our Christmas present from Sean, Jeana, and Russell, a gift certificate for Olive Garden, which is our favorite family restaurant. Instead of actually going to the Olive Garden we decided to bring the Olive Garden to New Windsor and had the best carry-out Italian dinner I can ever recall having. We toasted each other with spring water in our crystal wine glasses that were a wedding gift from Uncle Paul. It was fun and then off we went to church and basketball practice, regular almost daily events in the Gamber household between Kyle’s, Lily’s, and Pastor Horner’s schedule.

We had even more cause for celebration today as Annie hit some breakout numbers on her CBC, with her WBC’s now over 2500 and all else looking really good. Thanks so much for the prayers and we ask for special prayer on February 6th, which is Annie’s 6th month testing date at Johns Hopkins, where we will find out just how well she has done with Tim’s marrow. It will be a really tough day and is comprised of blood tests, CT scans, bone density tests, physical, and the nasty bone marrow biopsy, closed out by a visit with Dr. Flinn. So it will be a long arduous day and we both will need your prayers.

We heard that Nancy is doing super and is off dialysis, at least for the past week, which is truly answered prayer and Susan is packing tonight for her three week swing south in the family RV. God Bless them both and God Bless you all for your faithfulness. Tune in next week, but due to the Hopkins visit being Thursday I probably won’t have a new posting until the weekend. Someone asked me tonight when we stop counting the days. I told them after 15,323 more days when Annie will be 84 and I’ll be “you know where” waiting on her.

Ps THANKS to all of you who were so kind to have sent cards, emails, and made calls to Annie offering Day 180 congratulations. Your friendship meand so much to us and we will pray for you always.

Wednesday, January 22, 2003, Day 173
Day 180 is only a week away and today Annie received great news from Denise, our Hopkins Nurse Practitioner, which is NO MORE CYCLOSPORINE as of day 180!!! Cyclosporine has to be the most disgusting smelling medicine that a human being has to take to stay alive; but, it sure is a wonder drug and the operative word is “alive”. Apart from the smell and being big enough to choke horses, it cost over $10 per pill, so taking 4 daily adds up quickly, which will also make Golden Rule happy. Denise also told Annie she is her first patient that has ever gone the full six months without breaking down, sobbing to her to quit the pills. I might add that through this entire ordeal Annie has been a real trooper about everything and I really admire her resilience over things that would have felled many others long ago.

We found out today that our friend Mark, who was a fellow true IPOP patient when we were, is doing great, which is wonderful news. Mark suffered with some serious issues and we Praise God for his healing. We are also praying that he, Liz, and the kids will continue to do well as Mark winds down the road to full recovery. We heard that Nancy has been a real trooper despite suffering greatly from pneumonia and other side effects. She recently moved from inpatient to IPOP and temporarily lives near the hospital until her Day 100. As a matched unrelated donor transplant there are more issues that can worsen things for her than Annie has to worry about; that is, at least in their frequency and or severity. Go Nancy Go!!!! Thanks again for all of your prayers and we are praying that she will continue to get well and shortly discontinue her dialysis treatments. Susan is doing fabulously well and we are planning a dinner with her and Joe for late February after her Day 180. She is doing so well that she is taking off for a three week motor home adventure with her family through the Deep South. I know she will be laughing at us all of the way as we endure the coldest winter in my memory. God has been so faithful to all of us and I just feel it in my heart that it is because of your faithfulness that He has answered our prayers.

Annie’s numbers are still hovering on the low end and we are praying that once she discontinues the Cyclosporine that her WBC will begin to move up more quickly, but as Dr. Jones told us, we have more WBC’s than we need anyway, so as long as they are doing the job don’t worry. No colds yet, so we don’t worry and with God and Jesus on our side, who has to worry anyway? Many thanks and God Bless!!!

Sunday, January 12, 2003, Day 163
It’s hard to believe that we are already 10 days into the New Year and life is so boring. We are ticking off the days, living normal lives, going to church, basket ball games, dinner, driving, and doing everything a family usually takes for granted that this time last year we thought would never be something we could do. God has truly given us a miracle. Annie is getting stronger everyday and her head of hair is growing, growing, growing.Dr. Kruter told her this week that as much as he enjoys seeing her he wanted to make the visits every other month for now. He was somewhat surprised that I wasn’t with her at her visit on Thursday, asking “Where’s your bodyguard?”; but, I was in Springfield working with a new client and haven’t really felt of any use lately when it comes to medical stuff. I can’t say as if I miss it, either. In less than a month we will be at Hopkins, a visit I won’t miss, for Annie’s six month checkup on the 6th. We will also being seeing Dr. Flinn on that day in addition to the battery of tests that Annie will be taking. We are beginning to make up a questionnaire for Dr. Flinn as we have many minor issues that we want to resolve in our minds; such as,. Annie’s weekly metabolic tests have been great except that her BUN rating has been slightly elevated at 36. (Blood urea nitrogen (BUN). Urea nitrogen also is produced from the breakdown of food protein. A normal BUN level is between 7 and 20 mg/dL. As kidney function decreases, the BUN level increases.) Dr. Kruter isn’t concerned, since her creatinine level is fine, but we are interested in what Dr. Flinn will say. (Creatinine is a protein produced by muscle and released into the blood. The amount produced is relatively stable in a given person. The creatinine level in the serum is therefore determined by the rate it is being removed, which is roughly a measure of kidney function. If kidney function falls (say a kidney is removed to donate to a relative), the creatinine level will rise.) So, as you can see Annie is a boring subject to the doctors…Praise God!!!
Nancy has been responding to all of your prayers and it appears that she is beginning to turn the corner and hopefully she will be off dialysis in a week or so as her kidneys begin to deal with all of the proteins that are created during a transplant. We haven’t heard anything from Susan this week so we feel that all is well there, too. We are looking forward to seeing all of our nurses and other Hopkins friends when we visit so we can catch-up on old news. We are especially hoping to see John on this visit since we missed him the last time around. We ask that everyone pray that results of Annie’s test will conclusively show that God truly has delivered us a miracle. God Bless and we’ll see you guys on the court as this week started our 6 day a week basketball season for our two super stars, Kyle and Lily!!!
Ps. In case you wonder how I keep the days straight, Annie’s brother Chuck told Annie just to add 151 to the date this month and it will give the days since transplant. Thanks Chuck, my fingers feel better already.

New Year's Day 2003, Day 152, 11:59PM

HAPPY NEW YEAR to all. This will be a quick posting that I will follow-up in greater detail later this week. On behalf of the entire Gamber family and especially Annie, I want to thank everyone for all of your prayers, support, and kindness shown to us in 2002. It is our prayer that each of you will live in His Glory and that He will Bless you with much happiness in 2003. Yes, 2002 was a very trying year for our family, but oh, what a Blessing it turned-out to be. So many wonderful things happened for us that far out shadowed the darker days. Most importantly, God spoke to us in so many ways and has been so faithful in helping us overcome our infirmities. God is truly Great!!!

In the midst of all of our happiness we have sadness, too. God has taken our friend, Cathy Kohlenstein, to his Home to live in eternity. Cathy is a fellow BMT person who we know through several of our friends. Our prayers and thoughts go out to Cathy's family, especially her husband and three teenage sons. Please pray for them.

Our friend, Nancy who underwent her transplant last month is continuing to struggle with mouth sores and kidney problems. We ask for your prayers that she responds well to her treatment and recovers quickly from her temporary discomfort and setback. The kidney function is very important and can develop into a serious complication to recovery. We are asking God for another miracle.

We haven’t heard from Susan since before Christmas, but she was doing great and making a speedy recovery back to normal. Praise God!!

Annie has lived such a normal life these past several weeks that we forgot how much trauma her system has gone through so yesterday she just plain tuckered-out and didn’t do anything as she tries to recharge her batteries. Her test results for the week were steady and the only issue of concern was a blip in her BUN, which measures the kidneys’ performance. Laura, from Dr. Kruter’s office called to tell her to drink more water, at least a gallon a day!! The entire house is filled with empty water bottles and we are definitely Deer Park’s number one customer. Keep praying for Annie’s continued recovery and God Bless All!!!

Christmas Morning, December 25, 2002
Day 145
Each year at this time the world takes pause to recognize the birth of our Savior, Jesus Christ. It is a time of joy, happiness, and giving to others. It is a time of unselfishness. It is a time when we understand how little of ourselves that we do give, paling God’s gift to us. To those of us who are parents, who among us could consciously and without any remorse give their child to die for another. I would think that even those parents who have lost a son or daughter who sacrificed their life in battle for our freedom held on to some hope that their children would return and surly did not plan for them to die. Yet on this day God gave His only Son, Jesus, (born on earth, incarnate, possessing both a human and divine nature as He walked among the people), knowing that He would be wrongly convicted and sacrificed on the Cross. Jesus, the Christ, our Messiah, took our sin with Him on the Cross, asking the Father’s forgiveness on our behalf for all of our transgressions and died for each of us, so that by believing in Him we can live forever. Such a gift, such Love.

Oswald Chambers better explains the magnitude of God’s gift to us in “My Utmost for His Highest” “The veil is drawn aside to reveal all it cost Him to make it possible for us to become Sons of God. His agony (God for giving His Son to die and Jesus for the act of dying such a horrible death) is the basis of the simplicity of our salvation. The Cross of Christ is a triumph for the Son of Man. It was not only a sign that our Lord had triumphed, but that he had triumphed to save the human race. Every human being can get through into the presence of God now because of what the Son of Man went through.”

“The model of the Christian’s Spirit is Christ Himself” He gave all of himself to us. Such a gift. So we want to say Thanks to God and Merry Christmas to all of our family and friends who have given us so much and who been such a great comfort in our time of need. Your thoughts, prayers, good wishes, and helping hands have been so overwhelmingly filled with love in the spirit of Christ. As you have witnessed God’s Grace and Love for us, each and everyone are of part of His miracle. God heard your prayers and He delivered us from the desert as we truly believe that Annie’s has been totally cured, and this is a gift, which is so much more than we deserve. God Bless all and we pray that you and your families and loved ones will enjoy this wonderful holiday and God’s gift to us of everlasting life.

Tuesday, December 17, 2002, 6:30 PM, Day 137
IN CASE YOU HAVE FORGOTTEN. Today marks our one year anniversary when this journey began with the middle of the night trip to Carroll County General Hospital. Annie in unbearable pain and anguish, feeling that not only might be dying, but that dying might be a better alternative than her to her then current state of being. If you didn't believe in miracles for ordinary people before, you should believe in them now. As I am writing this update Annie is sitting in the gymnasium with Kyle watching Lily's basketball game, which began just after she left home, drove to the library in Westminster, picked up Kyle from guitar, headed 20 miles to Reisterstown for the game, and by now is heading home. Just like old times!!! Just 365 days ago I thought my wife was going to die and toady I know she is going to live. Praise God and Believe that WITH GOD any problem can be solved as our God is a God of Miracles. (Exodus 4:6-7)

Thanks for all of your prayers for Yvonne. She came through surgery with flying colors and all 13 lymph nodes which were removed during surgery were negative for cancer. It’s a mystery to the doctors as no other evidence of the cancer has been found since the initial biopsy, so God has surely Blessed us. Please keep praying for Yvonne’s speedy recovery and that she will be back on center court in just a few weeks. We have heard nothing but good news from Chica Jane whose surgery was a great success and she is now home with Bryan and Daniel recovering swiftly and getting ready for the holidays. Chica has done so much for us and is one of the most energetic persons I have ever met and I have no doubt she’ll be out and about and better than new in a few short weeks. On Friday we attended the Johns Hopkins 11th Annual BMT Holiday Party at the Weinberg. It was a somewhat weird feeling being at the Weinberg for a party, but it was a great time. We saw many of the doctors and nurses who watched over Annie this summer and you could see in their faces how pleased they were when they saw her. No one could believe that she just had her transplant in August. We got to ask Doctor Jones a bunch of questions and the bottom line is that Annie is a success. God has definitely delivered a miracle to her that few people in her situation receive. Carla gave us the news that Annie’s six month check-up has been set and we will be at the Weinberg bright and early on February 6th to get an update and restaging of her cancer. Our two favorite Fellows, Yvette and Christine joined the party and everyone just marveled on how great Annie looked, especially with hair!! These folks mean so much to us and I just can’t tell you how much your prayers have met, too. BUT, as you can see, prayer does work miracles.

While we were at the party we decided to drop in on Nancy who just had her transplant several days before. She looked great but was just recovering from a traumatic bump. Her Hickman line failed and had to be removed and a new one implanted on the opposite side. It was quite and ordeal, but if it’s the worst thing to go wrong she too will have been blessed. She asked that we thank everyone for their kind thoughts and prayers. Although she will be at Hopkins through Christmas and the New Year, when she is discharged she will walk out knowing that she will have many more Christmas’ and New Years’ to come at home with her family. Nancy has MDS, a pre-cursor to Leukemia, and her transplant is from an unrelated giver of life. I can’t urge everyone enough to look into the possibility of being a bone marrow donor. It’s no very difficult and in Nancy’s case and that of many others it is the only shot they have to being cured and living a normal life. You can learn how to be a donor at http://www.marrow.org/ . Please visit today as the gift of life is the greatest gift of all.

Annie is going to call Susan to see how she is faring but we are confident that all is well for her, too. We have some difficult news to bear. Jack Farrell, the 27 year old son of our friends John and Donna, has had a major set back with brain cancer. He contracted brain cancer over 5 years ago and after being arrested it is back with a vengeance. Because he has been heavily pre-treated from before, radiation is no longer an option. The tumor has spread and is beginning to affect his quality of life. Jack and his parents are strong in the Lord and what they must be going through can only be described as a nightmare. Yesterday afternoon they visited Hopkins for a special chemo treatment which prayerfully will shrink Jack’s tumor. We are praying for a miracle and ask that you add jack and his family to your list, knowing nothing is too difficult for our God.

Annie’s visit with Dr. Kruter was truly uneventful and boring and we all know what that means…it was great!!! Her numbers are steady and as Dr. Jones told us we all have a lot more white cells than we ever need and it seems as Annie is using and replacing them as any normal person does. Praise God!!

Speaking of getting life back to normal, Annie attended her first basketball game on Saturday to watch the Heat play. You could tell by the way that Kyle played that it was an inspiration having his mom in the stands for the first time this season. It was also nice to see all of the parents of his team members who have done so much and prayed so hard for Annie and our family. To top things off, she actually went to Target and did a bit of Christmas shopping on her own and we plan to start attending some evening church activities, and ask that you pray for God’s continual protection of her, especially during the flu season.

Have a great week and I hope you’ll check back with us next week.

Thursday, December 12, 2002, 9:00AM, Day 132
Praise God! Annie’s mom came through the surgery with flying colors!! She is doing great and is expected to stay in the hospital for 4-5 days. They did not find any conclusive evidence of the cancer in the pre-operative testing or throughout the surgery phase and various biopsies that were conducted on the nodes. The tissue has been sent to the lab for a more thorough examination and we should have the results by Monday. Please keep up the prayers and be sure to add Yvonne to any prayer lists that you may be on. God Bless and have a great weekend.

Wednesday, December 11, 2002, 7:00AM, Day 131
There is ice, snow, and rain everywhere around me this morning as schools are closed and traffic is struggling with black ice and crazy drivers. But in our home there is Great Sunshine as the love of my life and two of my greatest Blessings are peacefully asleep. I have been taking this quiet time to thank God for all of the sunshine that He has brought into my life and to pray for our family, friends, and other people in need. This morning we are praying especially hard for Annie’s mom, Yvonne, who is to be operated on this morning at 8AM, providing she and Charles can get to the hospital, (and the surgeon, too). We have been Blessed with what we are praying is great news, in that all of the tests and scans done so far on Yvonne’s Squamous Cell Carcinoma have been inconclusive and did not locate a primary site, so today they will begin to take out lymph nodes in her neck area and biopsy as they go to try and find the culprit. Unlike Annie’s cancer the SCC can be difficult to locate and assess. All we know for now it’s malignant and where it was found is typically not the primary site. So, please keep praying for Yvonne that they find it, treat it, and rid her of it forever. In God all things are possible and with Him on our side, we need not fear our enemies.

This morning I was reading about David and Saul this morning (1 Samuel 24:1-25:44). David was a man who fought against all odds throughout his life, but being a man of great faith and fearful of God he was able to overcome his enemies and lived to serve God and the people of Israel. I love the history of the Old Testament as well as the lessons it teaches us. One lesson throughout is as soon as one stops focusing on God in their life, trouble rears its head, but by looking to Him there is no trouble that is too difficult for us to handle, and He never gives us more than we can deal with. Life can be simple with Him and simple is good.

Annie is rock steady and her numbers are stable. She is only 49 days from her 6 month anniversary when we will go back to Johns Hopkins for extensive testing and the re-staging of her cancer. We continue to ask for your prayers that her tests confirm that there is great reason for her feeling so good; that is, she is well!!!

Our friend Nancy is having her transplant tomorrow and has been responding well to her pre-treatment. Praise God for your prayers. We haven’t heard any further news from our other friends and no news is GOOD NEWS!!! I’ll be checking in with the rest later this week. On Friday we are attending the 11th annual “Holiday Bash” for former BMT patients and their families. It is also an evening to celebrate those that have lost the fight on earth, but are not forgotten.

Have a great week and God Bless

Monday, December 2, 2002, 5:53 PM, Day 122
This will be a quick up date. First of all Annie and I want to thank you for all of your prayers and kind thoughts for us as well as for others that we have been following. We just heard back from Jane "Chica" Hogge and her operation was a terrific success and she's now home and about. We are praying that the biopsy of the tissues will be negative and that she can look forward to at least 50 years of "no more pain"!!! Jane was so helpful to us during the transplant and if it wasn't for her unselfish love I would not have been able to leave Annie as much as I did to take care of other things.

I haven't heard and later news on the rest of the folks, except we will hear the results of Yvonne’s (Annie’s mom) MRI tomorrow sometime and are praying that the cancer is localized in the neck area.

Another friend of ours and a faithful prayer warrior who whipped a stage three lymphoma last year was recently diagnosed with a Thyroid condition that is most likely cancerous. She underwent a major operation today and we are praying that if it is truly another cancer, it too is localized and curable. God Bless Emily and we will keep you all abreast of her progress.

Annie's CBC was very good today as her counts are still holding steady, which is good considering all she is doing around the house in addition to fending off the stealth colds as all of us do with normal immune systems. God is Good!!! No other issues and she had her first afternoon out on the town on Sunday,(well, not the big town...just at a little restaurant in Westminster, where they sat alone and enjoyed some great Italian food), with her buddies, Linda and Bev, for the annual celebration of Bev's 29th birthday. A jolly good time was had by all. Take care and God Bless!!!

Wednesday, November 27, 2002, 9:00AM, Day 117
Our journal is now over 90 pages and it would take twice that number to express our heartfelt thanks to all of our family, friends, many of whom we don’t even know, who have and continue to pray for us and lend their support throughout our journey. We are especially thankful for Dr. Flavio Kruter, who is Annie’s oncologist and for Ian Flinn, her Johns Hopkins BMT doctor, and Denise Longo-Schoberbein, Annie’s nurse practitioner. We are also so thankful for all of our wonderful doctors, nurses, and other medical support personnel who have fought so hard to win the battle. They truly are unsung heroes in our book. Needless to say there is no way we would be where we are today without Golden Rule Insurance, who have been totally supportive of us in every way and have paid every bill without trying to figure a way not to have to pay. They have been a source of great comfort to us and I can’t tell you all of the insurance horror stories that we have heard and how great these folks have been to us. I pray that they will be successful forever and continue to practice what their name signifies.

Last week Pastor Horner’s message was about giving thanks to the Lord for everything that happens in our lives and even for things that are happening that we don’t ever see. There is no question that God has Blessed us with a miracle, but maybe His greatest Blessing is that we are more aware of just how much He really loves us all and how instrumental He is in our lives, down to the least of the least. Thanks be to Him, who is the God of Miracles.

I also want to take a few minutes to update everyone on what is going on in the lives of some other folks we have talked about in our journal. Annie’s mom, Yvonne, recently found out that she has a malignant cancer known as Squamous Cell Carcinoma. Last week she had a PET scan, the results of which were non-conclusive. We are praying that this is good news and that the tumor is localized in her upper neck region. To be on the safe side the doctors are going to do an MRI of her head to rule out brain cancer. There will be other tests done and perhaps a second opinion from a teaching institution. I will keep you posted and ask that you put Yvonne in all of your prayers and on your respective prayer lists. Susan continues to gain her strength and is functioning much better than anyone could have predicted based upon her rough ordeal with pneumonia nd other side effects of her BMT. We are looking forward to getting together with her and Joe after the holidays. I learned last night that Kathy Kohlenstein is home. Kathy has had two BMT’s this past year and has suffered greatly from the treatment toxicity that occurred in her first transplant which did not engraft. She has been fighting a minute by minute battle with the aftereffects that have literally attacked her primary organs, especially her liver. She is a woman of great faith and only her faith has seen her through. Our God is a God of miracles and she is in need of just that. We pray for her daily and I am in such awe of her spirit and her will to live against all odds. Keep praying for her as God has brought her so much further than the doctors ever thought she would get and we know that He can take her the rest of the way, too. We haven’t had a recent update on mark, but it’s no news is good news and we feel that he is doing well and continue to pray for him.

Dr. Kruter started the BMT Diva’s Club this week at the Center for some of his younger adult patients that are facing what we have already been through. He asked Annie to chair the club which had its first meeting “ad hoc” at the Center on Monday. Susan and Nancy have cancer. They are both Annie’s age and share a lot in common including teenagers. Nancy has MDS a precursor of Leukemia and Susan has a Stage 4 Indolent Lymphoma as did Annie. Nancy enters Hopkins next week to begin her journey, which is being managed by the infamous Dr. Jones, who we all know and love. She has not had any toxic pre-treatment so her body is really strong and all should go well with her chemotherapy. Susan had her first meeting with Dr. Flinn and is still looking at all of the data nd in the process of making a decision to move forward. Both would appreciate and greatly need your prayers. Nancy has been Blessed with an unrelated perfect 12/12 matched donor. Susan has 5 brothers and sisters, none of which have been typed as yet. We know the pain that they are experiencing and are very happy that we can be of some help as they begin their journey.

The numbers this week are steady and up a bit. We continue to get weekly CBC and CMP and all is well. A few aches and pains, which is quite common and shared by most who travel this road. God Bless you all and have a wonderful Thanksgiving as we will have our best.

Monday, November 19, 2002, 8:50PM, Day 108

Annie is now Day 108 since she had her BMT. We have been so Blessed by God and all of our faithful friends, Her WBC numbers are seesawing but fairly steady in the 2000 range and an ANC at 1300. The red blood cell numbers are steadily rising with the Hematocrit at 32.2 and Hemoglobin at 10.2. This is good news as it means that Tim's marrow is doing its job and the metabolic of last week are great, so there are no signs of graft versus host disease. She is doing just about everything that she was doing this time last year except for driving and playing soccer. Those things will come after the six-month check-up. Dr. Kruter examined her on Thursday and pronounced everything is "great", so she got her hug from her favorite doctor and went home. Home school is going well and Annie is busy getting Lily up to speed in math as the course did not arrive until last week so she is playing catch-up.

We are asking that you pray for Annie's mom. Yvonne had a lymph node removed for biopsy and it seems as if the beast has again stricken our family. In this instance the cancer has been diagnosed as Squamous Cell Carcinoma, a solid tumor that is classified as a type skin cancer, but really presents itself much differently as a solid tumor. On Thursday she will undergo a PET Scan, which is similar to a CT Scan, except that the injected dye finds any cancer tumor cells and lights them up on the x-ray. With this procedure the doctors will be able to tell where the cancer is coming from. We are praying constantly that the tumor is treatable and manageable. We are asking the Father for another miracle and I know she as will all of her family would appreciate you praying for that miracle.

Well, it hasn't been the greatest of weeks in my book, either, as I went hunting a few days before opening season slaying a big doe; too bad it was with my Pathfinder. She was quick but Black Beauty was quicker and it struck her going about 50. It was a bit dicey keeping it on the road and God Blessed Kyle and me by not having her positioned head-on so it only tore off the left front-end and side. I really felt bad about the doe but was unable to avoid her without taking a chance of flipping us over. We were traveling at the worst time of the night for deer crossing, which is just after dusk. It's my first deer accident and prayerfully my last, but at least the doe went to the homeless shelter for soup, so some good will come of the incident. Our insurance company was great and had reserved a new SUV for me within 15 minutes of my call. The ajuster took care of everything else. He told me that he is getting "deerly" rich from so many such calls weekly. Now I am a bit more skittish about driving to basketball practice at 6 PM, but trust that God will continue to protect us. Please keep up the prayers, especially for Yvonne. God Bless and I'll be updating next Monday, when Annie has her next test and hopefully we will know what's happening with her mom, too.



Tuesday, November 12, 2002, 11:21AM, Day 102
We'll I guess patience is the name of this game as God has instructed us and continued faith that He will heal us. Annie's results form yesterday showed a great increase and Dr. Kruter was so happy that he drew a happy face Martian on her results with "Good Work". The WBC was back to 2400 and the ANC was a whooping 1700. Platelets were up to 113 and the Hematocrit back to 29.5. There are no other issues and she is having good days as she continues to assume new responsibilities and is pretty much back to normal days, except for driving. Speaking of driving, I had a little run-in with a big doe Sunday night and the doe was definitely the winner. Our Pathfinder is all bent out of shape and we are awaiting the insurance adjusters report. Thank God neither Kyle nor I was hurt and I managed to keep the vehicle on the road after impact. We were traveling at 50 so it was quite a shock to us and the deer. Lily is on a field trip studying the bay from the deck of a 100 year old Skipjack and the rest of us are just working. Quiet and boring and after the deer incident I can handle some more boring times. God Bless and we should be back on the weekly update schedule this week.

Wednesday, November 6, 2002, 12:26PM, Day 96
The results are in and for the first time in 36 years Maryland has a Republican governor. We need to pray that this one fares better than the last, who was Spiro Agnew. Spiro went on to be Richard Nixon's Vice President but after serving a short time Spiro became embroiled in a bribery scandal that originated in Baltimore County, Maryland. In order to avoid jail he resigned and that's the last we ever heard of him.

Speaking of results Annie's test results are in and she is still plodding along, steady, but a bit slower than we'd like to see. However, the folks at Hopkins are not concerned since she is not having any symptoms. As they say everyone runs the race a bit differently, but winning is the ultimate goal and we feel that with God and you folks on our side how can we not win. So it's back to watch and wait until next week. Please continue to pray for Annie's complete recovery without any issues such as Graft vs. Host. Also pray for our family as we transition back to the real world that we continue to focus on Him and His love for us. No further tests this week so the next update will probably not be posted until November 17th.

GREAT NEWS!!! Annie spoke to Susan who is doing real well except she has significant issues with her lungs and the scaring that occurred due to the ventilator and pneumonia episodes. She is being monitored almost daily and we are praying that all of the damage will heal. As for other BMT issues, PTL, there are none. Our friend Mark has been released from daily IPOP visits and all is going great we hear. Praise God for answered prayer. Thanks for you faithfulness and God Bless You all.


Sunday, November 3,2002, 7:30PM,Day 93
NO NEWS is GOOD NEWS!!! We have no news to report this week except that Annie is doing great and feeling quite normal. She is home schooling full time and taking care of most household chores that do not require driving (Yeah!!). Her weekly blood test was postponed until tomorrow as it will be done by the Hopkins team. We have been a bit concerned that the lab screening of her cyclosporine levels has been off and want to double check things at Weinberg, plus it will be nice to see all of our old friends in IPOP. We even plan to drop in on Dr. Flinn for a surprise visit. I will post the results of her blood work on Wednesday, when we get them back. Please pray that all is well and that her counts are rising to a new plateau. God Bless you all and we'll see you soon.


Saturday, October 26,2002, 9:00PM Day 85
The weeks pass quickly by and everyday our lives seem to get closer to normal. Except for inside events that are outside of our home Annie is pretty much doing everything she did before we began this journey. It’s really heart warming watching her become more and more like her old self and she is even sporting some new fuzz on her head and we are noticing more hair growth every day. The kids are doing great and their lives are back to normal. Today Lily’s team lost a close game to play in the soccer championship next week. Sadly, we will be watching from the sidelines. Kyle is back practicing twice weekly with the heat who are tuning up for our opening Thanksgiving tournament.

On the count side the WBC is still somewhat lower than we’d like to see at 1700, but everyone seems satisfied that although the journey is slow the progress is good. It also seems from the latest CBC that the red counts are on the up swing, so we aren’t worried and just counting the days, one day at a time. Please continue to keep us in your prayers and we will keep you in ours. The best news that we heard this week is that our friend Mark is back in IPOP after several weeks of life threatening issues. He’s doing great and we know that Liz is breathing easier. Thanks for your prayers for Mark. They worked!!! We’ll be checking on Susan tomorrow and will give you an update next week. We expect nothing but great news on her front. She is truly a walking miracle. God Bless You all and what a great and appropriate Thanksgiving this year will bring.

Saturday, October 19, 2002, Day 78
Oswald Chambers writes: What is my dream of God’s purpose? His purpose is that I depend on Him and His power now. If I can stay in the middle of the turmoil calm and unperplexed, that is the end purpose of God. God is not working toward a particular finish; His end is the process – that I see Him walking on the
Waves, no shore in sight, no success, no goal, just the absolute certainty that it is all right because I see Him walking on the sea. It is the process, not the end, which is glorifying God. I first read this; that is, Annie read this to me on the morning that we were going to the hospital for her transplant. I store it and did not again refer to it until this morning as I was organizing the past two months and shedding all of the excess stuff I accumulated over the summer that because of His Grace I will no longer need, nor will Annie. You don’t know how good it made me feel to toss the manual “Care of Your Hickman Catheter” or our appointment schedule for the pre BMT regime. God just doesn’t say enough, and great doesn’t reach the mark either. As I look back over the summer I know that God was truly walking on water for me and His purpose was achieved as I was seldom perplexed or anxious; in fact, I sometime felt guilty because I just wasn’t worried, which in this world translates to not caring; but oh I did care and I do care. I was given the greatest gift I could ever want from God, which was one more day with the most precious person in my life and as He promises He continues to multiply that one more day. My pelican has flown from the wilderness and God is his infinite graciousness healed her wings. Praise be to the Lord, for He is Good!!

This week brought the news that the genetic testing confirms that Annie is 100onor marrow!!! This miracle means that the transplant has been a great success and that all of her old immune system that wasn’t working has been replaced with Tim’s system that is working. Theoretically, if there is any cancer cells hiding somewhere his killer cells are whacking them just like hers should have, so in effect, Annie is a new person and everyday her immune system is getting stronger as it matures. She still needs to take several medications to prevent certain diseases like pneumonia and viral infections, as well as cyclosporine, which suppresses both hers (probably non existent today at 100onor) and Tim’s so there is no rejection by Tim’s graft of Annie’s organs. GVHD is still a threat but we are probably halfway to the point where it will no longer be life-threatening, if it would occur. Day 180 seems to be the target date for withdrawing all prophylactic drugs, but even after day 100 many other threats tend to disappear, especially viral infections. So, please keep prying and I will update again next week. The other great news this week is her metabolic panel was in line with normal and that is a major indication that GVHD is not lurking in her system. Her WBC is still lazily hanging around 2300 but it won’t be long until it starts gaining some momentum, too. Her red blood cells are improving with a Hematocrit of 29 and platelets are almost normal. So, news is great and life is boring, but getting back to work and the real world has been fun. God Bless you all.


Saturday, October 12, 2002, Day 71
Welcome to the most boring family in New Windsor. We are settling in and it is almost as if we never left. We are certainly getting back to routine quicker than I had anticipated and far quicker than Annie's hair is growing back. However, I did notice this morning a proliferation of fuzz which is a good sign and by Christmas I should be back to calling her “Spike”; but, as always, who cares about hair when one can breathe fresh country air. I thought I would miss hotel life a bit, but actually haven’t had any desire to live such a life style again. The only real current controversy pursuant to the transplant is whether we do another biopsy. I think we may wait until the 6 month check-up, but we hear through the grapevine that Dr. Flinn may want us to do it anyway so he can see if there is any bad marrow left, or the percentage of marrow that is impacted by cancer cells. Just before the transplant the biopsy revealed that 40f Annie’s marrow was non-functional due to the cancer. Evidently, even though no cancer was found in the marrow aspirate sample taken two weeks ago, it doesn’t necessarily mean that Annie’s marrow is normalized. When we talk my question to him will be, if the percentage has not gone done significantly, would you at this time consider a new treatment protocol; i.e. Rituxan or additional chemotherapy mop-up? If not, and the only reason that another biopsy would be done is to validate then I would vote to wait until 6 months as long as the weekly blood tests look good. My gut feeling is Dr. Flinn will want another biopsy, so if he pushes hard I do not plan to push back, and Annie has already resigned herself to following Flinn as he has helped get us this far and he is the expert. So, please pray for wisdom for all to make the right decision.

Annie’s weekly blood test and other reports were excellent and there are no sore thumbs sticking out. I was really encouraged by the liver function tests and it appears that there is nor rejection process occurring, which is our main worry. So thanks for continued prayer and I will update on a weekly basis now that we are at home. I am going to try to be consistent and have the update in the queue by Sunday evening every week. Don’t hesitate to call us at home as I told Annie this morning, but for driving, she has taken just about every burden off my back. God Bless. Gary

Tuesday, October 8th, Day 67
THE RESULTS ARE IN……WELL, almost that is. Annie and I played telephone tag with Denise for most of the day and by 5 PM we gave up (Denise is our Nurse Practitioner from Hopkins who is in charge of Annie’s long term care). However, I was able to get the results faxed to me and if I am reading the flow cytometry test correctly, they did not find any cancer in the blood sample, which cam from the marrow aspirate. HOWEVER, there was a neat little note informing us that the bone marrow biopsy could not be completed due to “INSUFFICIENT TISSUE”, which according to the lab person who I was able to contact meant what it said. The shot that was heard around the world when Don struck the nerve in Annie’s pelvic bone was a dud and we do not have any results relative to the ratio of Tim’s marrow to Annie’s marrow. God tell us to be patience, but patience is sometimes hard to control. So…logically speaking I think they will ask for a new test next week. Joy oh joy, you can imagine just how excited Annie is at this time, but I have to admit that she took the news a lot better than I would have in her position. We’ll see tomorrow so please stay tuned in and continue to pray. The results we have received so far are great and we are not discounting them to God and are super thankful that He is showing us both his g=Grace as well as His Mercy. God Bless You All.

Sunday, October 06, 2002, Day 65
WE ARE HOME!!! Glory to God and thanks to all who have been so faithful to us. We should have the final analysis from the biopsy on Monday or Tuesday and I will update the site. It has been a hectic weekend packing, moving, and unpacking. Thanks to Michelle, we got home on time and don't know how we would have done it without her help. See you guys soon. God Bless.

Friday, October 04, 2002, 9:00 AM, Day 63
So…Yesterday we had our discharge class and I asked Annie on the way home what she had to say after being away from home for 75 days and this is what she said; “I’m Free, I’m Free, Thank God I am free at last!!! Yes, it is to His Glory that we are heading home today and as much or little as we like the city there is no place like home. Later today we expect to have biopsy results and have been praying that Annie’s engraftment is solid, but neither of us is worrying about it and as always we are asking for His Mercy.

We have been so Blessed by God, by His gift of you guys…our friends and family. It’s truly amazing to us that over 4500 people have logged-in one or more times since we got here to get the news of our lives, especially about Annie’s progress. It has been a joy to me to have been able to write these words and through this trial we have all learned such a great deal about life and the precious numbered days that we have together. One always hears about life altering events but I guess we don’t pay much attention until it happens to us and I truly believe this has been a life altering event for me, as I know it has been for Anne. Where we head from here is in God’s hands, but we are ready for whatever He has in mind for us, if anything or nothing. In any event, it is my pray that I can continue to grow closer to an “Oneness” in Him and humble myself to His Glory.

As I have updated, Susan is doing really great and is making the daily trek from her home in Olney to IPOP. She is very much looking forward to being kicked-out of IPOP, too, and we all plan to get together soon after her discharge to celebrate God’s love.

On a more difficult note, a friend of ours form IPOP is in great distress. Mark is Day 41 from an autologous transplant and his numbers are still “0”. This is a very dangerous sign and two days ago he was admitted for infections and fluid retention. He is on oxygen and cannot function otherwise. This means that his life is literally hanging from a thread and he and his family are in dire need of your prayers and support. We saw his wife, Liz, on our way out yesterday and she just broke down and began to sob. They have two young children at home and she is under such tremendous pressure that I can’t imagine her pain. Mark has ALL leukemia with the Philadelphia chromosome mutation. This is very serious and unless his numbers begin to rebound there may be nothing the doctors can do except wait. Mark needs God’s miracle, so please pray for him and his family, especially Liz.

As I look out our 13th story over the horizon, I see some darkness. Annie and I are praying for nice weather today for Tim. Through the graciousness of our friend Chica Jane, who has done so many things for us since this began, Tim and his buddy Greg tee off today at Caves Valley Gold Course at 1:04 PM. I know they will play the course, rain or shine, but I would personally like to see it shine for Tim, who has been so much a part of our journey. Even though I am sure he still thinks of Annie each time he sits on a hard spot I know that he is ever so happy that things are going so well. We had hoped to see him today but our moving schedule conflicts; however, as soon as Annie is ready to travel I will be taking her to visit Tim and the Carroll family in Philadelphia, (actually his home is north in Langhorne).

I will post the biopsy news later today or tomorrow morning and will probably do a weekly update through Annie’s 6 month check-up. There are still many issues that we may face, but we aren’t going to worry as we are in Great Hands!!! God Bless You All.

Tuesday, October 01, 2002, 11:00 PM, Day 60
This is going to be quick. Anything that could go wrong today that was of no significance went wrong. Everything that we prayed to go right went right. It all began at 6:00 AM with the coffee maker, which did not come on as scheduled. Then the annoyance moved to the garage where I have been parking for the past 70 days, expertly dodging poles that were placed by some real amateur architects in the most inconspicuous places, which today I dodged right but forgot to dodge left and now I have a 30° rear bumper and Annie is still complaining about whiplash. Luckily she is not practicing law at this time or I might get sued. We got to Blayloch 5 at Hopkins with no more incidents and we were rushed at 8:15 AM by our nice doctors, as we were unscheduled for surgery, into a free operating room which was scheduled for 8:30 AM for someone else. Well, the 15 minute procedure to remove the Hickman took 45 minutes and as I nervously paced after the first half hour I finally learned that things had gone array and they had to perform some surgery after all. So…all the pains that we took to avoid potential infections went south as the Hickman was just too well seated to yank. So…Annie now has 4 stitches as well as the port that we delayed removal of since we didn’t want to take any unnecessary chances. The good news is that there are no more dangling wires and we got out alive. Then back to IPOP for a CBC, which was great as Annie has now broken the 3000 WBC barrier!!! The ANC is over 2000 and above low range normal!! Her Hematocrit is still hovering on the low side but it is mostly watch and wait until it too is back to normal. Then we slipped in for the CT Scans, which were reviewed by our nurse practitioner and radiologist, who concluded that all organs are in excellent condition and of normal size!!! Praise the Lord!!! Then Annie had her bone marrow biopsy and both she and I went through the roof in screaming agony when a never was hit, driving her nice new 1” nails into my hand which was holding hers and it was painful to say the least, but IT IS OVER AND WE WILL BE HOME FRIDAY!!!! W E WILL GET THE PRELIMINARY RESULTS ON Friday…so, pray, pray, pray. God Bless You all and I have got to go.

We saw Susan in IPOP as we were waiting on the nurse and she would give Cindy Crawford a run for her money. I told her she looked like sunshine after six month of dark. God is a miracle worker and this woman has truly experienced His handiwork.

Monday, September 30, 2002, 8:00 PM, Day 59
Annie’s Verse of the Day
TO You I will cry, Oh Lord my Rock:
Do not be silent to me,
Lest, if you ARE silent to me,
I become like those who go down to the pit.
Hear the voice of my supplications
When I cry to You,
When I lift my hands toward Your holy sanctuary.
Psalm 28:1-2
Folks are asking Annie and me if I have stopped the updates. Well, the short answer is NO. Prayer and prayer requests are still part of our daily existence, as they should be and as they will be for the rest of our lives, also as they should be. The Father knows what we need, but as a father to a child, He still needs us to express ourselves. This lets Him know that we are abiding in Him. What we need to understand according to Oswald is that “we can never think of anything our Father will forget, worry becomes impossible.” “Panic is bad for the natural heart and it is destructive to the spiritual life”. Jesus says, “Let not your heart be troubled”—it is a command. So, don’t feel guilty like I sometimes do if you don’t worry, but also don’t forget to abide in Him by praying and giving thanks for all things, as I also sometimes forget to do. In this way He understands that you know that He is the Father and that we are His children.
The long of my response to the web site is that for the past week school has escalated, work has taken off like a rocket, I still have 4 people to clean, cook, and do whatever for, (no complaints, just facts), and I am simultaneously packing things up as we begin the process of moving permanently again to our home in New Windsor…PTL!! Also, there were soccer games on Saturday, and Annie and I celebrated our 17th anniversary Friday evening at the apartment while the kids were at a youth group gathering at the Roemer’s in Finksburg. . AND, after getting Annie asleep I ran to pick up the kids at 2:00 AM in the morning. This was after they had finished wrapping care packages for the Wakefield Valley college contingent. So at 3:30 Am I was about to update the site and just conked-out. Annie tells me I am just getting old. But the great news was that on my way back from dropping the kids off I called to see what Annie was in the mood for eating. Well… I know she is well and good to go as she asked me to make her favorite; linguine and white clam sauce, which is a dish I have been serving her on special occasions for all of the years that I have known her. That my friends add up to lots of clams.
Tomorrow is a big, big day for us, especially for Annie. At 8:00 AM we report to Hopkins for removal of her Hickman catheter, which normally wouldn’t take more than a few minutes to yank-out, but since Annie also has a sub surface port, care must be taken so as not to accidentally disengage the port line which is situated in the same vein as the Hickman. The doctors also advised to keep the port for six months, and then remove it when she is less susceptible to sepsis infections, which can occur after surgical procedures, especially dangerous to the immune suppressed person. At 1:00 PM Annie undergoes a bone marrow biopsy to determine the level of chimerism that has occurred as of day 60. This is done through extensive DNA testing, the preliminary results of which should be available before Monday. Chimerism is the coexistence of donor and recipient cells and the biopsy will measure the ratio of Tim’s donor cells to Annie’s host cells. We are praying for 100im, but the doctors will be pleased if the level is greater than 60t day 60. (See: http://www.4transplant.com/en/chimerism.htm) The purpose of Annie taking Cyclosporine, as bad as it is to swallow, is to increase the level of chimerism and control the rejection of Tim’s cells by Annie’s immune system. If all goes according to protocol Annie will be able to stop taking the “horse pills” around Day 180. Then she should be 100/- Tim. At 3:00 PM she is scheduled for a series of CT scans if she still has enough energy to maintain herself for the entire day. If she gets too tired the CT tests will be postponed until Thursday. The purpose of these tests is to determine if she is still in radiological remission and to determine if any organs have been affected by cancer. So…as you can see, Tuesday is a big, big day.
If all goes as planned and it is His will, we will be sleeping in New Windsor Friday night!! Please pray that the tests will go well and that the cancer has been eradicated from Annie’s body. We are asking for God’s mercy that His will be that Annie is cured. Please pray that I have the strength to continue in my role for the next four months until Annie is able to drive and resume some of her old activities. (I sure have gained great respect for single parents and wonder how they can possibly take care of home and work full time, for years, and not just months.) Pray that our move goes smoothly and safely and that the disruption that has occurred in our children’s lives will end and we will be back to normal as normal can be. God Bless You All and I will post the results as soon as we have them. Thanks for you kind prayers.
Also, GREAT NEWS!!! Susan was released on Friday to IPOP. We actually got to see her and Joe as they were making a dry run to Rockwell House where they will be staying for several weeks while Susan visits IPOP. She looks wonderful and asked us to thank you for all of your prayers and kind thoughts. We hope to see her during our visit to IPOP sometime on Tuesday.
This article ran in the New York Times on September 24, 2002. It is a wonderful exposé on the rewards of giving another person the “Gift of Life: 2 Strangers, Yet 2 Twins”
By SHELBY ALLEN,
I am belly down on the operating table, a living donor: unpaid, unrelated and unknown to a person with leukemia near death in another hospital and waiting for my marrow. I banter with the surgeons who will extract marrow through needles probing my rear pelvic bone. All is well. I have considered this operation for two months. I feel noble and pure; supported, not pressured to donate. Marrow transplants between strangers are arranged through a donor registry. Marrow, bone's spongy core, produces white blood cells, activating the immune system. Transplanted marrow can help treat leukemia and other potentially fatal blood diseases — if donor's and recipient's marrow antigens match. Only 30 percent of patients find a family match. Others search a list of volunteers who have had their marrow classified by type. Sometimes families sponsor recruitment drives. I saw a newspaper article, "Volunteers Wanted: Friends of Jay," about a young man needing a marrow transplant. Maybe I was the miracle match. The recruitment site was nearby; a nurse pricked my finger for a smidgeon of blood to test. I liked flinging my marrow type out to the universe. Would I find a twin? The woman next to me had a general's determined chin and eyes burning with purpose, as if tears had dried, igniting courage. "This is Jay's mother," the nurse said. The stakes became clearer: "Chance of a Lifetime," a brochure said. The odds of finding an unrelated marrow match range up to 1 in 1,000,000. Jay found a donor eventually, but I was not the one. But four years later, the phone rang. Although more tests were needed, my marrow seemed to match someone else's. The National Marrow Donor Program offers the choice of whether to help, not whom. You are asked to consider giving marrow to any patient.A thick notebook arrived: "Now That You Are a Match." One article, "When Altruism Fails," surveyed donors whose recipients died. Most did not feel guilty. Doctors presented the case. Somewhere, a woman, 47, needed marrow. Although I was the only match for her, I could decline. No one would tell her or ask me why. The risk involved anesthesia and possibly discomfort. If I consented, she would receive full-body radiation, destroying her marrow, and her life, unless my marrow arrived. I received a thorough physical and gave more blood samples. I also grew scared, hopeful and excited. Bob, assigned as my donor advocate, provided answers and information. Nobody pressured me. My husband thought I was pushing generosity into self-sacrifice and refused to hear about it. Others asked tentative, awed questions; I could see them wondering how they would decide. One person said selflessness was unimaginable. I agreed: giving requires self. I was receiving something besides attention, but what? The secret-pal factor was intriguing. But nobody on the donor team knew the recipient's identity or even mentioned her. I was the focus. I signed the form and became more careful crossing the street. My religious group said a prayer. By transplant day, I felt so prepared it seemed routine. Almost. I obsessed about a note I could send with my marrow; unsigned except "Your Donor." How to sound concerned but not intrusive? At the last minute, being wheeled into surgery, I scribbled "Get well, soon." The operation was anticlimactic, until I turned and saw a plastic sack filled with liquid rubies. "That's life in the bag," a doctor said. The focus shifted. Filtered for stem cells and packed in a little plastic cooler, a quart of my marrow left by courier, giving the recipient a 40 percent to 60 percent chance to live. My marrow would soon replenish itself. In a year, we would know if the transplant had worked. I left the hospital the next day, buoyed by a wave of support. I felt tired for a week, stiff in the backside. Bob reported frequently; the recipient was doing well. I too received an unsigned note: "Thank you for giving me a second chance." After a year, with mutual consent, names were revealed. We met eventually, but what donating gave me was less personal than human: a larger connection, both special and ordinary, the sense of an us. For information on how to register to give life to another, please go to http://www.bonemarrow.org/index.cfm?action=test&area=13
Thursday, September 26, 2002, Day 55, 7:00 AM
Annie’s Verses of the Day
On the same day, when evening had come, He said to them, "Let us cross over to the other side." 36Now when they had left the multitude, they took Him along in the boat as He was. And other little boats were also with Him. 37And a great windstorm arose, and the waves beat into the boat, so that it was already filling. 38But He was in the stern, asleep on a pillow. And they awoke Him and said to Him, "Teacher, do You not care that we are perishing?"
39Then He arose and rebuked the wind, and said to the sea, "Peace, be still!" And the wind ceased and there was a great calm. 40But He said to them, "Why are you so fearful? How is it that you have no faith?"[1] 41And they feared exceedingly, and said to one another, "Who can this be, that even the wind and the sea obey Him!"
When the storm arose the disciples did not rely on Him, but rather on their own fears. They panicked and were without confidence in Him, when confidence is just what God expects of us. According to Chambers a great point is attained in our spirituality when we stop worrying God over personal matters or over any matter. God expects us to glorify Him by remaining absolutely confident in Him. I need to add that before this journey I worried too much about not petitioning God enough in matters that confront me, where I need His help. I used to feel guilty, and sometimes still do, when I did not ask for my many needs. I think that because I don’t pester Him I am not showing Him fear and respect. How very foolish that I would think this. He already knows that I need so why should I ask? Shouldn’t I concern myself with my relationship in glorifying and praising God? It is my relationship with satan that brings on guilt, not my relationship with God. God brings me peace when I act to His Glory. This morning as I looked over at my “little squirrel”, who was peacefully asleep I felt peace and today I plan not to worry but to do Glory to Him. It is my desire to no longer micro-manage my relationship with Him, but just to praise Him and remain absolutely confident that “His purposes will be fulfilled”.

Glory to Him!! KICKED OUT!!! Well, I must say this is the first time that I have ever been kicked out of a place that really made me jump for joy, but getting kicked out of IPOP is just that….a God Praising Joy!!! Yesterday it became official and we were told that as of Friday we are only allowed to come to IPOP on a friendship mission. We have been demoted to out patient at Weinberg for next week and then home for good or at least until our six month checkup. Glory, Halleluiah!! I am so filled with joy that I may even kiss Skittles when I get home.

When we first began this leg of our journey over two months ago we were overwhelmed by the fact that we would be away from home for at least two months or maybe more. Well, looking back today I can honestly say that the time has passed much more quickly than I ever expected and these days have gone by like a wink of the eye. We have done so much, yet so little during this time. God is drawing us nearer to Him and we are drawn closer to each other in every respect. We have made wonderful new friends and have shared both their pain as well as their agony as they have shared ours. We have grown to better know those who we counted as friends from before and have truly experienced what true friendship really means. We have become closer to those in our family, including our children, a Blessing that we will cherish for life. All of this in 60 days…only God could devise such a plan and perfectly execute upon it in such little time. WE ARE TRULY GRATEFUL for all that He has done and is doing in our lives.

Last night we got the great news that Susan is being released from in patient to IPOP. We saw her yesterday and though she couldn’t speak from all of the temporary damage caused her throat by the pneumonia, breathing tubes and medications you could see it in her eyes that she was ready to go. Joe called me last night and thanked us for all of your prayers and I told then that we will continue to pray for Susan and can’t wait to see her later this weekend…a free spirit, unbound.

Last night’s Heat practice was great and it seems that we will field another great team, for which may be the last year that these guys play together as a unit. Next year is high school and all of the guys will be playing JV or varsity sports in school. We are looking at several high schools for Kyle, who will more than likely transition from home schooling to private schooling next year, so we ask for your prayers in this matter and especially for wisdom for us to make the best choice for him. Both Kyle and Lily have started the year out with a bang and they are doing great schoolwork.
I am gong to use this day to get organized as I transition back to the business world. God has been good and the business is looking real good even though I haven’t paid the kind of attention to it as I would have liked. We are also gearing up for a big weekend as the kids have many youth group activities planned as well as sporting events. I pray that the rest of your day and week will go great and don’t worry about anything as He is taking care of business.


Tuesday, September 24, 2002, Day 53, 7:00AMAnnie’s Verse of the Day
Who is the man that fears the Lord?
Him shall He teach in the way He chooses.
Psalm 25:12
Oswald writes “To be haunted by God is to have an effective barrier against all of the onslaughts of the enemy” One way that the enemy slays us that we all fall trap too at one time or another is worry. Worry is so foreign to the life of a saint that is even considered sin to do so. But, we do worry as it’s just human nature to sin. It has been a long haul and we have traveled our journey step by step, experiencing a few bumps, twists and turns along the way. And by no means are we at the end of our trek. If you have followed us then you will understand what I mean when I say that we have learned a great deal about God, ourselves, our family, and our friends in this brief time that we have been away. We have also learned a great deal about affliction and how it can impact one’s life and the lives around the afflicted. But in magnitude, we have learned but a smidgen of what our Father intends us to learn in the course of our lives about Him. I am not the most scholarly person on the face of the earth; in fact, I am quite average, but I have learned that the on book that can be continually read and reread without becoming a bore is His Word. I am truly awestruck by how I can read a passage today and the a week or more later it take on a whole and new meaning to my life, which I guess is why it has always been referred to as a “Living” word. I do not get the same meaning when I accidentally pick up the same Tom Clancy novel and read it for the lack of anything else.

So…my point to all of this is that although I have read Psalm 25 numerous times, yesterday it took on a whole new and different meaning to me. God haunts us in this way, because yesterday I was worried. I began to question; is this thing going to work? Is it working? Has it failed? Where will we be next week? Here or back in New Windsor as we have planned and as we have been praying for? Yes, I was haunted yesterday by God and admonished for my lack of trust and sin of worry. None of our doctors or nurses appeared worried that after a steady progression, Annie’s counts dropped over 35n less than two days. Most importantly, no matter how I quizzed her, Annie wasn’t concerned either. They say it’s a sixty day slump that many in her situation face, but to me it was a crash and burn, as beelzebub got under my skin and I wasn’t fit to be around. God in His infinite wisdom got me out of the house and I spent last evening at Kyle’s Heat basketball team tryouts and taking Kyle shopping in a multitude of places. Annie stayed home alone for the longest period since we came here and Lily was at Robin and Jackie’s for the night. So, I had plenty of time for God to regain control of my mind and just said “Whoa” . Why should I worry? There is nothing that I can do to change the outcome and God has been with me every step of the way and I do have faith that it is His will that we be healed, so I felt Him reasserting His barrier to the evil one and by the time I got home late last night I was at peace and it was peaceful for all of us throughout the night.

These past several days have been a whirlwind. Annie’s dad and sister left early Sunday morning for Pittsburg, so they would be home in time to see brother Paul on the History Channel talking about the origin of Microsoft and how IBM unwittingly helped it grow from an ant in technology to a behemoth, twice IBM’s market capitalization in a matter of less than 20 years. It was a fascinating sorry and to hear it from Paul’s perspective was great fun. Paul had written a best seller business book about the IBM and Microsoft relationship in the late 1980’s, “Big Blue…The Unmaking of IBM”, which told all about this corporate fiasco and even today is well worth reading. Chuck hung around with Annie for the day until the program was over and I rushed him to the airport to catch his flight back home to Minneapolis. It was a great weekend and Kyle and Lily also had a ball at their brother Sean and Jean’s home for the weekend. I had a very interesting Sunday morning as I heard the bells ringing across the street at the beautiful Old St. Paul’s Episcopal Church and decided to attend the morning choir service. This brought back many old memories of the days when our son Sean sang every Sunday morning in the St. Paul’s Boys Choir, a choir that has been around since 1692 and has traveled all over the world singing beautiful songs of God. Time really flies as it has been more than a decade since I last visited the church and walking through the door, it seemed like just a few days ago. The service was very grand and the church is a magnificent work of architecture, which made for a most memorable Sunday.

Today, I have several business appointments and Annie and the kids will be doing school. As I sit here I here the beautiful bells again, which means it’s 8:00 AM, so I must run-off and start my day. God Bless You All and please continue to pray for us and above all…do not worry. Ps…We did not check on Susan since Saturday as Joe was going to call if anything important occurred, so we are confident that she is regaining her strength and we hope to talk to her today. Thanks again for all of your prayers.

Saturday, September 21, 2002, 9:00 PM, Day 50
Praise God! We had great news today. Susan has stabilized and is off the ventilator as of early today. She is just beginning to come around and has a sore throat but will quickly recover. I spoke to Joe to day as he was heading home to take a much needed and well deserved nap. I want to thank all of you on his and Susan’s behalf for your prayers and kind thoughts.

We had a great day, too. As you know, Annie’s brother Chuck is here for the weekend and we were joined by her dad, Charlie and sister Martha late Friday afternoon. This morning after breakfast all of us left for Lily’s soccer game in Reisterstown. Another valiant effort by her team came up a bit short but it was a great game and Lily made some really good plays, both on offense and defense. After the game we all headed for Fuddruckers for burgers along with Robin and her daughter Jackie, Lily’s friend and teammate. It was a grand afternoon and afterwards Kyle and Lily left with Sean to spend the night with him and Jeana. We went back to the apartment and have been talking about a little of everything and having a good time just hanging. Annie hasn’t had a bout of nausea for over a week and we are thankful for your prayers and God’s mercy.

I hope you are having a great weekend and God Bless you all.

Friday, September 20, 2002, Day 49
Annie’s Verse of the Day
And forgive us our sins; for we also forgive every one that is indebted to us. And lead us not into temptation; but deliver us from evil.
And he said unto them, Which of you shall have a friend, and shall go unto him at midnight, and say unto him, Friend, lend me three loaves;
For a friend of mine in his journey is come to me, and I have nothing to set before him?
Luke 11:4-6

I was contemplating late last night, as I watched Annie, who was curled-up and sleeping peacefully like a squirrel in its nest, what I have learned the most about our lives since we began this journey and I think what strikes me the most is true friendship. I have learned that no matter how dark the days got, they were always brightened by our friends…you guys, who were and always are here for our family and especially for Annie. Literally, we didn’t have to hardly hint that we needed something when four or five of you guys would jump in and gave us much more than we asked for. Like when I asked someone to pick up the kids at school and take them to their home until I was able to get there to pick them up, and our friend said, “Don’t worry about coming the 30 miles to us, we’ll bring the kids to your place, whenever you want us to.” Or, the times when friends would give up their slots in the carpool to let our kids have them, even when it meant that they would have to drive an hour plus both ways to take there kids to school. A friend, oh how so humbling it is to have such people in ones life. God has Blessed us so. And our families have been such a joy and comfort to us, dropping out of their busy lives to fly or drive from wherever to be with us, not just for companionship, but to serve us in our every need. Then, we have developed a much better relationship with a Friend, who is a friend to all; that is, Our Lord, who is always with us, watching over, and protecting us everyday. He is the one Friend that is modeled through you guys and I know He is feeling good by the way you guys have responded as His helpers. I don’t know how we can every thank all of you for all that you have done for us, especially for all of your prayers, but I hope that you will never hesitate to call on us for anything and any need. We are your friends, too.

Thursday was a great day! Nothing much happened, except that Uncle Chuck arrived late Wednesday evening from Minneapolis. We hung-out all day and had lots of fun. A friend of ours came to visit and we had a Pizza Party, with great pizza from Franco Zeppi’s in Canton. I spent a few hours with some buddies trading lies and just enjoying each others company. Last night, I wokked shrimp in black bean sauce with sifun noodles and it was a big hit for all except the shrimp. After dinner Chuck, Annie, and Lily started on a crossword puzzle and finally at a quarter of eleven I had to drag Annie off to bed.

Today is a first. I am doing a business meeting in Columbia and Chuck will be taking Annie to IPOP for a routine visit. This is the first time I won’t be there for an official visit. Praise God for Uncle Chuck as I don’t think I would be where I will be today unless he had come to help-out. After IPOP they plan to head-up to our home to check things out and pick up so needed supplies. It sure will be great when we move home for good!!!

Annie will be checking on Susan’s condition today. We did not hear anything yesterday, so we are praying that no news is really good news. Keep Susan and her family in your prayers. Also, we thank you for keeping us there, too. God Bless you all!!!

Wednesday, September 18, 2002, 9:00 PM, Day 47
Joe called last night to ask for us to pray and request others to pray for Susan, which we are doing. Susan’s condition is critical and it has been confirmed that she has some type of pneumonia and is currently unable to breathe without mechanical assistance. As bleak as his words sounded there is hope as she has responded much stronger than expected and is starting to move forward two steps. We ask that you continue to pray for Susan as she and her family is reaching out for God’s mercy and God will not hide Himself from them. You must also pray for Joe with whom I can emphasize with as I know that he is in pure agony over the turn of events and I will pray that like me Joe comes to know God even better and to recognize the most important elements of life, which after Him is our wives and families.

It’s hard when worrying about Susan to move onto a high note, but I must let you know some great news. For along time we have believed that Annie’s nausea is attributable to all of the drugs that she is taking. Currently she is on 7 different medications, taken at 10 AM and 10 PM everyday. We decided this morning to stagger the medications over a 90 minute time period, with the horse pills, Cyclosporine, being the last down the hatch. She did not have one minute of nausea today, except for a few minutes that was caused by an emotional conversation with an old friend who graciously offered to help her out with a client, since Annie is unable to take care of court matters until she has fully recovered. It is just another overwhelming sign of God’s love for us and confirms how God goes before us to make things work out, just as He lighted-up the nights so that Moses could lead His people in the desert. Perhaps this coupled with a good night’s sleep is what God intends us to do to get back to normal, because Annie was as normal as normal can be considering what she is going through.

The next kudos are for her counts today, which were 2500 WBC, 1250 Neutrophils, 95K Platelets and a Hematocrit of 28. Praise God, the turtle is winning the race!!

I apologize for my brevity, but nothing else really went on today, as if this isn’t enough to happen in one’s life in a day, but I have to dash out to BWI to pick up Chuck who is coming in from Minneapolis for a visit.
God Bless you all and please continue to pray for us and Susan.


Tuesday, September 17, 2002, 8:30 AM, Day 46
Annie’s Verse of the Day
And about the ninth hour Jesus cried out with a loud voice, saying “Eli, Eli, lama sabachthani?” that is, “My God, My God, why have your forsaken Me?”
Mt. 27:46
I remember making that cry on February 3rd. How ignorant was I to think that God had forsaken me when I learned of Annie’s cancer. Saul lamented that God had departed from him and that God did not answer him anymore. But God does not hide His face from us. It is we who hide our faces from Him, for it is His Kingdom and He rules over all. Chambers writes: “but think of the agony in which there is no God, neither in Heaven above nor earth beneath, only the terror of an accusing conscience. No human sympathy can touch that desolation.” Only Christ can understand the depth of our agony and as we build a relationship with Him then we may begin to understand that God never forsakes us. It is His plan that we must abide by, and very importantly it is His plan in His time; not to understand this is agony. We can’t change the outcome for tomorrow but we can accept what we have been given today and yes, my agony was deep, as deep as my understanding of Him was shallow, but it is this journey that is helping me better to understand who I am in relation to Him.

Our friend Susan is in crisis. Last night Annie learned form her husband Joe that Susan no longer is breathing for herself, but has to be on a ventilator for respiration. To further complicate things, the doctors think she might have pneumonia. I am asking all of you to pray for Susan and her family and that God will deliver her today from her agony. I know she must be petrified as is her family, and they need comfort that can only be given by Him. When I look at Susan’s journey, a woman younger than Annie and probably in as good if not better physical shape, I can only feel God’s Grace. Pray for God’s mercy for Susan and Joe and pray for His wisdom to be imparted to her doctors. Pneumonia is always a dangerous affliction, even for the strong, but to an immune suppressed person, pneumonia means an affliction that only be dealt with by drugs and it has been found that the success of drug therapy is limited without the support of a person’s immune system; that is, there is no replacement for God’s design.

Monday was a very boring day!!! We went to IPOP for a routine checkup and as the day went by Annie was feeling much stronger, strong enough even to go with me to pick up the kids from school. Everyone was tired so we packed it up and racked-out at 10 PM and for the most part the night went well for Annie. Today is our day off and we plan to “clean house” as we get ready for Chuck, Charlie (Annie’s dad), and Annie’s sister Martha to come for the weekend. Chuck will actually arrive late Wednesday night and the others will hit town Friday afternoon. Kyle and Lily are very excited as on Saturday they will be staying at their brother Sean’s and new sister-in-law Jeana’s house for the first time. I even think Pooh Bear, Sean and Jeana’s new family addition, is excited by the younger Gamber visitors visit and hopefully all will enjoy each others company.

One other note. Kyle has taken to the guitar with passion and Annie and I am very impressed with his dedication as well as his musical abilities, especially the song writing. Though somewhat bizarre for my taste, he is very creative. He and some other buddies are planning to start a band and I am so excited that I am thinking of taking up bass guitar. I always wanted a Gibson. Have a great day! God Bless!!

Monday, September 16, 2002, 6:15 AM, Day 45
Annie’s Verse of the Day
HAPPY ARE THE PEOPLE THAT ARE IN SUCH A STATE;
Happy Are the people whose God is the Lord!
Psalm 144:15
Oswald writes that “Happiness is not a sign that we are right with God; happiness is a sign of satisfaction, that is all, and the majority of us can be satisfied on too low of a level. Jesus Christ disturbs every kind of satisfaction that is less than delight in God.” Solomon stated that the only true joy in life is based on a personal relationship with God. It’s a relationship that lasts a lifetime on earth and in eternity afterwards. I gave my life to Christ just about 11 years ago, but it has only been recently that I am beginning to feel a profound relationship with Him. Needless to say, He disturbed my quiet idyllic life a bit this past year, and I feel that His disturbance of my life will continue until I get right with Him, which may mean that it will go on forever as getting right is a forever thing. I say forever as last week I noticed my life was getting out of control again so as I began to ponder why I realized that I was no longer being right with Him. I was again taking our relationship too much for granted. So I pray that this week I will right my ship and sail into smooth waters.

Speaking of Joy, I learned the real meaning of it again last night when I was Blessed to attend the Sunday evening service at Wakefield Valley. The outpouring of love and friendship just overwhelmed me to the point that I wanted to move back home that very evening. I know that everyone of the folks I spoke to last night have been faithfully praying for us as the all had there own little web site story or comment. Pastor asked me to tell the congregation the latest news and I thought I was going to burst out crying, but I think the joy in my life was evident to all. One is never alone in a relationship with Christ and it makes life even better when one adds a relationship to His community. Thanks for the bottom of my heart Wakefield folks, you have brought such great joy into our lives.

Lily had a great camping trip and was really excited to get back last night to attend her first youth group meeting ever, since she has moved up with the older kids. When I arrived to pick her up they were singing one of my favorites…”Lord I lift your name up on High” and Lord I do lift up your name and thank you for your faithfulness. What a great happiness that only You bring into our lives.

Off to school this morning but I needed to share this with you. Annie had a very relaxing day to make up for the busy Saturday that really wore her out. I was so happy to see that she was doing well when I got home as yesterday was the first day that I had changed her Hickman dressing and I worried all day that I had done it wrong and that germs were invading her like kamikazes; but, she was fine and God protected her and I learned again…”Don’t worry, be happy.” He is there.

Saturday, September 14, 2002, Day 43

On Friday we headed into IPOP for our final end of the week checkup and as usual we are in receipt of His Mercy and all is going just great. Our new attending physician, Dr. Leo Luznik, has officially released Annie to go out into the real world with caution. Dr. Luznik is conservative so we feel very comfortable following his advice, which basically amounts to avoiding crowds, sick people, children and only removing the face mask when we are safely in open space. Annie has been getting a little sore throat lately so he placed her on an antibiotic, Levofloxacin, for prophylactic purposes, which will last about 10 days. We also met with our Nurse Practitioner, Demise Longo, who examined Annie and proclaimed her fit and ready to do new things. So…it looks as we will definitely be home for good at the end of the month, even though we can go home now we are going to transition slowly as we still need to report to IPOP every MWF for at least the next two or three weeks.

After we left IPOP I dropped Lily and Annie at the apartment and Kyle and I went to Owings Mills for his four month check-up by Dr. Modly, his Dermatologist and afterwards we picked up some lobster tails that were on sale for half price at Safeway and home we went where I wokked up a spicy Asian Lobster Curry and Annie had her first “real” meal in four weeks, so I know she is getting back to her old self. We turned in early as we had a big day was planned for today that included watching Lily’s first soccer game of the season, a visit to mom and dad’s, and finally our first movie!! Lily left for Gettysburg on an overnight camping trip with her friend Jackie and her parents, our good friends Robin and Pat Wheeler. Robin is Lily’s basketball coach and is one of the best coaches in the league, always fielding a competitive team, but even more important a team that concerns itself with character building more than winning. Lily’s team lost 2-0 but we all had a great time and it was Annie’s first day in the open air for more than 2 or 3 minutes since July 21st. After the game we hit the Subway, which provided even more credence to Annie getting back to normal as she managed to down a foot long sub something that she hasn’t done for a long time. It sure is good to see her back to her old self. We decided to take in the 5:00 PM show, My Big Fat Greek Wedding, and we all laughed and howled for two hours at one of the best comedies that we have seen for many years. I highly recommend it to all and there is no objectionable material, which is most refreshing since it’s hard to find a family movie that all can enjoy. Enjoy we did and afterwards it was off to Vito’s for pizza subs. I abstained this time as I am beginning to feel like the Pillsbury Doughboy and I need to get a grip or all of my new clothes will only be making folks that shop at Good Will happy.

Annie is planning a totally quiet and boring Sunday, hanging with Kyle while I attend a Knowledge Management Professional Society board meeting in Herndon, Virginia. (www.kmpro.org). We came to the consensus that Annie has had enough weekend for this weekend and we don’t want to wear our new immune system too soon, as it’s got to last at least another 40 years.

Next week we will be talking with the medical team about removing both the Hickman chest catheter as well as Annie’s port as it appears there will be no further need for it…PTL!!!! I imagine that we may get a bit of pushback on it, but we will pray for wisdom in making the right decision. Also, we don’t want toe sight that we are still in need of prayer for no graft versus host disease, no infections, no pneumonia, quick recovery of normal blood counts, and strength as we move home and Annie steps-up her home schooling activities. Speaking of which, the kids first week back to school went very well and Annie was able to work with them so they were able to complete every assignment. We also give thanks for having no nausea for the last ten days, for Paul Carroll being her last week and for his safe journey home and for getting released from IPOP to go home!!! God has been as faithful as have all of you and we ask Him every day for His Blessing for you guys, too. Have a great rest of the weekend and we’ll be back to you shortly.

Thursday , September 12, 2002, Day 41

Our Verse for the Day
A Psalm of David.
1 The LORD is my light and my salvation;
Whom shall I fear?
The LORD is the strength of my life;
Of whom shall I be afraid?
2When the wicked came against me
To eat up my flesh,
My enemies and foes,
They stumbled and fell.
3Though an army may encamp against me,
My heart shall not fear;
Though war may rise against me,
In this I will be confident.
Psalm 27:1-3

Yes, the wicked have fallen and all of the Glory is to Him. The Gamber’s are going home to New Windsor. Praise God!!! We received the final vote of confidence on Tuesday from our doctors and Annie has been released to a MWF schedule, which they will let us do from home. They cautioned us about throwing caution to the wind as Annie is still in a very fragile period and will be subject to a host of issues for the first 180 days, while she is on immune suppressant drugs. The most critical time for catching life threatening infections, pneumonia, and other BMT anomalies is the first 100 days, of which we have passed all but 59 with flying colors. PTL!

Yesterday was a big day for all of us. I left Annie for the first time since July 21st for other than shopping or routine errands, (although I did leave her in good hands with Donna, Sean and Jane, who tag teamed hanging with her for the day), to attend an all day sales meeting at Bamboo. I must tell you that all of the prayers that we and you guys have been praying for Bamboo are working too as business is starting to stabilize and we are looking to move into the stable phase and then on to growth. These are tough times for all businesses, but particularly for software; however, Lam and the team are tough and the tough survive. I took me time getting there and took all of the back country roads to avoid rush hour traffic that swamps the Washington Virginia beltway, and was even worse on Wednesday due to 9/11 road closings around the Pentagon. I rolled all of the windows down, grabbed a Starbucks and thoroughly enjoyed God’s Day for an hour and a half.
It was a great day, but then as I tell folks everyday is a great day when you wake up and smell the coffee!!

The Gamber family and the Carroll family have great immune systems and never get sick. I can’t remember the last time I had a cold, but yesterday my pride was spoiled when I was told that when you get old you stop getting colds!!! So, as to the great immune systems, the very first day back to school and both came home with colds, although they don’t seem severe, except last night Kyle was acting as if he had step throat. Streptococcus is a very nasty bacterium that can really create havoc for someone who does not have a strong immune system. This is why the Hopkins folks did not want us to live with the kids or at home during Annie’s neutropenia period, which thank God is now over; however, to be on the safe side I will be calling the IPOP folks this morning to see what they advise. Lily tells me that one of the kids came to school after just barely getting over pneumonia, which is highly contagious and I can’t believe a parent is that happy to send the kids off to school under such conditions unless they are just plain ignorant about infectious diseases. I must confess that even I did not know up until a year ago that one can catch pneumonia from another person. I always thought it was from not wearing your jacket in the rain as my mam-maw always pounded into my head as a young “devil-may-care” boy.

We had some very sad news last night as we learned that a fellow cancer friend, who just underwent her 2nd stem cell transplant for Acute Lymphocyte Leukemia is in a coma. She has fought a very hard brave battle over the last year and half and I can’t imagine what her family and friends are now going through. She has three teenage boys and we are praying for her and her family, especially for the boys. We also are praying for Cathy who also has a very close relationship with our Father and we are praying for His Mercy and for His comforting of her family and friends. We are also praying for that Miracle that we know God is capable of performing in His Will. Cancer is an evil disease that doesn’t strike just the person, but rather devastates the entire family and their community and we are praying constantly that through God man will develop the cure.

Today will be a quiet day since we are not scheduled to go to IPOP. I plan to catch-up on a ton of paperwork and do some real work for a change. God Bless you all and please continue to pray for us as well as others who are affected by this disease. Annie is prrof positive that prayer works wonders!!!

Tuesday, September 10, 2002, Day 39, 7:30AM
The Verses for the Day are from David’s Song of Confidence in God’s Triumph over evil
Why do You stand from afar off, O Lord?
Why do you hide in times of trouble?
The wicked in his pride persecutes the poor;
Let them be caught in the plots which they have devised.
Psalm 10: 1-2
Break the arm of the wicked and the evil man;
Seek out the wickedness UNTIL you find none.
Psalm 10:15

I will never forget September 10th because on this day in 2001 at 3:00 PM I was boarding a train for New York City. I had an appointment on Wall Street for 10:00 AM the following morning with some folks at Merrill Lynch to talk over some business ideas. As I was retrieving my ticket and boarding the train my cell phone rand and Matt, my partner in New York, was calling to tell me that our meeting had been postponed due to one of the Merrill Lynch principals having to be out of town. I was none too pleased, since I had prepaid my hotel to get a discount and I was psyched for the meeting and it’s potential.

To some this may seen like a coincidence, but to me in my current state of awareness for an Oneness with God I see His Hand being once again stretched out to me. Sure, I would have been safe from the attack since my hotel was 20 blocks away from the World Trade Center and my appointment, which was in the heart of Ground Zero was two hours after the fateful strike; but, God was protecting me for my family who would really need me to shortly step up to the plate. Although knowing the facts that I know now for some reason I look back and think perhaps I should have been there and maybe I would have appreciated my life even more had I stepped on the train. I may have been able to avoid these struggles that entangled so many others that I love in order for me to get my priorities in order; but, that was not God’s plan for me, and this journey which I am on today was His road for me. So here I am.

Man is always ready to step up to the plate in times of crisis and to accept God’s sovereignty in times of trouble, but the true test of man’s character is how he serves God and others when then is no crisis. I am at a point in my journey when I am beginning to question the level of my “saltiness” and whether I will go back to a complacent mostly carefree life, and await the next crisis. Or, will I have grown close enough to God to desire to get even closer? These next several weeks are going to be very important in determining how I will truly respond to His wake-up call. I pray that I don’t fall back asleep at the wheel and that I will continue my journey of trying to be one in Him until eternity and I ask that you pray this for me. Even if there are no more significant crisis’s on the surface of my life I do not want to suffer unto myself and waste which I have learned about me, my wife, and my family and our relationship to Christ in this brief time of crisis.

I fear that this is also true of our Nation as we remember what happened to us a year ago when we were sleeping in our journey with God. When evil struck, we responded, but we as a Nation must not respond only in time of crisis. We must prepare ourselves daily to submit ourselves to God’s Will and consistently rid our hearts and this world of evil. This is His desire for us and it Has been what He has desired for us since creation; that is, to be Holy and One with Him. As we move on to September 12th, I pray that our leaders and we as a Nation will not loose the significance of God’s Triumph over evil and we must heed that which is written in His Word in Psalm 15:10; “Break the arm of the wicked and the evil man;
Seek out the wickedness UNTIL you find none.”

God Bless You All!!

Monday, September 09, 2002, Day 38, 10:00 PM

Folks, what can I say other than PRAISE GOD and thank you for all of you prayers and support? Annie is on her 4th consecutive day of no serious nausea and continued improvement in her blood counts. Her WBC is 1650, Neutrophils 660, and platelets are a whopping 100,000!

Annie ran into Dr. Flinn today, who he told her that he plans to consult with our new attending physician about sending us home now, rather than waiting until September 30th!!! The below is my email to Dr. Flinn that says it all. God is Good and Gracious and we have felt the joy of His Mercy all throughout this experience. What a great day today was, as we continue to try to remain calm and wait on Him. It seems that every time we get anxious and stop the day to read scripture, in particular Psalm 27:14, God seems to reveal Himself to us even more, and shows us just how much He loves and cares about us.

September 9, 2002
Dear Dr. Flinn,
We saw Denise Longo today and we all agreed that Annie is doing great. (1650/660/100k/29.5) The nausea has passed and she hasn't required blood products for several weeks. Denise thinks she can go on a MWF IPOP schedule, so we should be able to go home to New Windsor, which is only 65 minutes to perhaps 85 minutes at rush hour from JHMI. (50 miles).

I propose that she be released to home this weekend, but I will not release our apartment until 9/30, just in case we find that she needs more care. I further propose that we don't schedule the Hickman removal until the end of next week as added precaution, even though she has a port. I know Annie will do great at home and away from cable TV. She was on cloud nine after seeing you this afternoon, so much so that she ate Tacos, a first for spicy food in three weeks, which surprisingly stayed down. When we do go home I will be with her as much as I am now, which for all practical purposes is 24x7. It does not seem to make any sense to stay in an apartment for what amounts to 1 hour every other day in IPOP. At day 60 she would be scheduled for her Bone Marrow Biopsy and predicated on the results would be released to Dr. Kruter for out patient care, except when she is required to visit JHMI; i.e. every 6 months, etc. I know Dr. Leo is conservative, but I won't do anything that will jeopardize Annie's recovery and I probably won't do much work outside of the home until next spring, anyway. Besides, she has even a greater support group at home and through family, friends, and our church that will take care of her every need.

I am not blind to the fact that there may be other issues down he road, but I faithfully believe that through you and the other great Johns Hopkins folks God has healed Annie and she will live to see our children get married and probably our grandchildren, too, although I may be a bit iffy for the latter!! Thanks for all that you have done and we look forward to seeing you soon. God Bless!! Gary

Please pray for us and continue to pray that all will continue to go well. Also, don’t forget Susan, who when we left her today was being seen by the cardiology team for chemotherapy induced heart and blood pressure issues. She is still struggling daily with all of the issues I cited before, but Praise God that her counts are beginning to rise and we are confident that He will continue to work in her life and heal her. She is a warm, loving person and we feel that she, like us, is being drawn closer to Him through this experience and we are praying that she accepts Him and what He is doing to heal her as His Blessing.

God Bless You All and New Windsor HERE WE COME!!!

Saturday, September 07, 2002, 11:00 PM, Day 36
Happy New Year to all of our Jewish friends as today is Rosh Hashanah, the Jewish New Year. We pray that it will be a happy and festive time for all who celebrate.

Today, we moved into our new apartment that we will be sharing with Kyle and Lily who start back to home school and Granite academy on Monday. Even though God Blessed us by opening-up the unit across the hall, it was still an all day pain and I have just finished organizing all of our junk. Both Kyle and Lily were of great help, and Lily’s contribution was immense. It’s a great apartment and tonight I was watching the filming of some TV show on Charles Street that I think it’s called “the Wire”, from our 13th floor apartment. It was very exciting watching all of the action from above.

Day Three….PTL, Annie had NO NAUSEA!!! It appears that she may be out of the woods as far as the unexplained nausea and we will continue to pray that it won’t come back. Nobody in our house believes it was a coincidence that the last of the nausea was soon after Linda’s prayer with Annie over the phone, backed-up by all of you prayer warriors out there asking God for His mercy. He was merciful.

We had a fantastic time for Paul’s last evening in town. What a great help he was to us and I was so happy, (but not as thrilled as Annie), that Paul got to see Annie transform from being very yucky to being a joyful time. The garlicky hens were a hit, as was the great wine that Paul sprung for at Triniacia’s that he and I alone shared, along with my home made tomato basil soup that was cooked-up with tomatoes grown in Bobby and Michelle’s garden. Kyle and Lily opted for gingered NY Strips, but Annie wisely stuck with just chicken. The hens were really garlicky as Annie has as yet let me into the room and near her. Oh well, some things may just be worth a few days banishment.

We had a new nurse today in IPOP. Kathy recently came back to IPOP after a two month sojourn and she was very nice, competent, and quiet; however, “Nurse Happy” took up the slack and we had a great time as we waited for the counts. The seesawing WBC took a dip, but both platelets and neutrophils were measurably higher than several days ago and if all continues to go well we will be back home before October 1st!!! For as good as Annie is doing our friend Susan isn’t. We stopped by to see her on our way home from IPOP and she is having a really miserable time and just about anything that can go wrong in the BMT cycle has gone wrong for Susan. She has fainting spells, her lungs are filling with fluid, and she is almost constantly nauseated. To further exacerbate her life, she is on oxygen for shortness of breath and has a morphine drip to dull the pain of a swollen esophagus due to severe mucositis and to top things off, she is retaining so much fluid that she has to take lasix. We are prying hard for her and she needs your prayers badly to help her through this miserable time. She needs to have hope and see some positive change in her life. I know she will appreciate your prayers as well as hearing from you. Please post some words of encouragement in Annie’s Guestbook and we will pass them along to Susan.

We had some real sad news today as Mary, the wife of my old acquaintance Tom Barnett, (who I worked with 30 years ago in public TV at Channel 67), passed away from ovarian cancer. She fought a valiant battle but is now with Him doing His works in heaven. God Bless Mary and please pray for Tom to be comforted during his bereavement. He and Mary have been married for over 30 years and walking with God.

Today was also most exciting with unpacking, organizing, shopping for school stuff, and running to the airport and to Reisterstown to drop Kyle at his buddies Phil and Spenser’s home. My day also included several trips to BWI, The Wire, and being visited by our son Sean. Sean, who is working towards his MBA, dropped in after his finance class that he is taking at the Baltimore Campus of Johns Hopkins. I also visited my dad who is recovering from recent gall bladder surgery and doing very well. He and my mom thank you for your prayers and dad should be back on the job before his 76th birthday in two weeks. We are hoping that tomorrow will be a bit more boring and that we will be getting back to a dull routine, which we have come to appreciate. God Bless You All and we’ll see you real soon.

Friday, September 06, 2002, 8:30 AM, Day 35
Annie’s Verse of the Day
And He said. “Blessed be the Lord God of my master Abraham, who has not forsaken His mercy and His truth toward my master. As for me, being on the way, the Lord led me to the house of my master’s brethren.”
Genesis 24:27

God walloped the nausea as your prayers and ours have been heard and answered. Yesterday, it was gone….like gone in 60 seconds. We even visited IPOP and no nausea. No complaints throughout the night and as of 7:30 AM all was well so we continue our prayers that Annie is on the upward slope and moving ahead two steps at a time. Even greater news was that her WBC was up 60o 1720 and her platelets were up 50o 74,000. The neutrophils are holding at 360, but they will continue to grow steadily as days go by.

We visited our friend Susan yesterday and she is in need of great prayer. She is Day 9. As easy as Annie breezed through her first three weeks, Susan has had the opposite experience and has been attacked by everything that we prayed would not happen to Annie, and which did not happen. Her throat is so sore that she can’t even eat and consequently she is constantly nauseated from all of the life sustaining fluids that she is being filled with. Her blood pressure is high and she is having dizzy spells. Her life is just miserable and although we all know it will get better and she will be cured, at this time I am sure she feels too sick to care. We need everyone to ask God for mercy for Susan. She is really in need of the Lord’s comfort and Spirit, so we are praying regularly for her. Susan is 34, very athletic and evidently quite the golfer. She will have been married to Joe for 7 years on September 30, so we are praying that she will have a Blessed Anniversary and that all of her present troubles will be but yucky memories.

It has been great having Paul in town and he and Kyle decided on the spur to go see the home run derby that the Orioles held last night, getting thumped 11-2 by the Rangers. Lily hung out with Annie and me and I spent most of the evening packing for our big move today across the hall to the big apartment where we will stay the next few weeks until Annie is released to go back to New Windsor. Although, it is nice at the Park Charles, I can’t say that I will ever look back once we leave. I had lunch with my buddy Gary Goldberg at one on my favorite downtown spots, Werner’s on Redwood Street at South Street. Werner’s is an art deco diner that has good food at inexpensive prices. It opened in 1950 and it’s worth a field trip for breakfast or lunch, even if you live in New Windsor. There aren’t many of these types of places around and it brings back such good memories of my downtown jaunts with my grandfather in the 50’s, where we would always stop in for a sandwich and one of Werner’s great chocolate milk shakes.

Paul and I lived together in the early 90’s in New York and when he was around I would always whip up a grand dinner, since Annie, Sean, Russ, and Kyle were at home in Baltimore, (Lily was in process), there was nothing for me to do at nights but cook dinner and once in awhile go to the theatre. In 18 months I did manage to see most of Broadway’s offerings and when Sean and Russ came to visit, we would hit the big movie theatres. So on Paul’s last evening in town I am going to treat him to a world class Northern Italian dish, Garlicky Baby Hens, which is comprised of various secret ingredients along with 40-50 sheathed cloves of garlic that are slowly cooked, and when done one squeezes the garlic cloves on French bread and dips all in the sauce. Mama Mia, who cares about the hens? Paul always liked my cooking when he was around so I want to send him home to Kim and the kids with a full stomach.

Speaking of Kim, I want to thank her for all of her support. This being a busy crazy week in her life, as she is planning, cleaning, and packing for the family’s big move to Lake Tahoe. She is going it alone, while back east Paul is going to baseball games and eating Garlicky Baby Hens. God love her for letting us borrow him during this most stressful time. AND…I promise that when Annie, (who loves to ski and can’t wait to go downhill with the kids), is ready to go next winter I will tag along and do all of the cooking and cleaning for Kim and try to give back some of the love that she is giving to us. God Bless You, Shannon and Claire!!! Daddy will be home tomorrow.

Annie and I were talking last night about this time in our lives and we recognize that it is a time of getting to be in oneness with God; that is, walking with Him so closely that we don’t have to continually ask for His guidance. Oswald Chambers summarizes that we all can see God in exceptional things, but it requires spiritual discipline to see God in every detail. We must never allow that the haphazard is anything less than God’s appointed order, and we need to be ready to discover the Divine designs anywhere. So it is here that we are learning to be loyal to God and moving towards “oneness” in Him, crediting ALL to Him and ALL to His Glory. I don’t know if we would have been able to do this without the struggles that we have undergone, but I do know that we would never have begun such a journey so soon without being chased by the beast!

Have a Blessed weekend and God love you all. Keep praying that Annie continues to respond and that she is credit and will not be attacked by any infections, viruses, or heavy stages of Graft vs. Host Disease.


Thursday, September 05, 2002, 8:00AM, Day 34
Annie’s Verse of the Day
Be diligent to present yourself approved to God,
A worker who does not need to be ashamed,
Rightly dividing the word of truth.
2 Timothy 2:15
According to Oswald Chambers, one must struggle in order to be able to express God’s Truth. That is, how can we profess Truth and how God loves us unless we experience trials in our life and trust Him to work in accordance with His promises? We can not develop any credibility that God relieves suffering, unless we suffer before others. Then God can use us to express His Majesty. We give all Glory to Him as it is He who is bringing us out of the wilderness and leading us His promised land. I think “wilderness” is the best one word descriptions one can give go cancer. Someone who has cancer does not know what the next day, or even the next hour will bring. It is a most unpredictable disease that can strike in many different forms and literally transform overnight into a completely different manifestation. It’s a beast!! No matter how much assurance the medical folks give you, they really don’t have the answer, but trusting God relieves our fear that man doesn’t really have the solution. Only man through God can cure our afflictions. So….this is why we trust in Him and through our suffering we pray that we can witness to others who are struggling in their lives, too, as well as those who may not be struggling today, but one may. (Our life sure changed from “Ho-Hum” easy street and it took less than a fortnight to derail. Thank God we knew a little about Him at the time as I cannot imagine going through what we have gone through, alone.)

God always has the answer, but we must be patient and wait on Him. Annie and I, as are our families, are struggling to get out of the wilderness, but our struggle has been reduced to the physical, as we allow God to handle the tough part, the emotional side of facing life as it confronts us. We can’t put it into words that express His Truth unless we have experienced the Truth. Through our experiences and our steadfast trust in God we pray that we are expressing ourselves well and always to His Glory.

As good as Tuesday went Wednesday went just the opposite. We forgot the cardinal advice of our wise Dr. Jones. Dr. Jones told us that Annie’s situation is like that of a baby who needs to be trained as they grow. (She will even get all of the childhood vaccinations around day 300) Like a baby, who is not going to walk 33 days after it is born, Annie is not going to run. Well, on Tuesday she felt so good and was so happy that Paul was here for a visit that all caution was thrown out the window and she partied hearty. Now, this is not “partying” in the vernacular sense of the word, as her partying was limited to eating two helpings of spaghetti AND sauce for the first time in three weeks, then not taking her nausea medicine and finally staying up too late in excitement. Consequently, she did not sleep, nor did I, so yesterday was a real killer. I can best describe it as how a three month old baby would be acting if it had a cold and not only did not get medication, but was awakened every 20 minutes throughout the night. You parents know what a nightmare this creates…well, our experience was the same.

At one point late in the day, Annie asked that I give her my gun. I replied that even if I had a gun she wouldn’t know how to use it. She said she would learn, which is how bad she felt. (I know the feeling as I once offered the Captain of a charter boat $1000 for his shark gun as I was so seasick I wanted only to die, and literally kissed the earth when we finally landed. Nausea can make you crazy.) It got to a point that the only thing we could do was pray, something that we both should have been doing together all day, but we felt too bad to concentrate. What a mistake. Finally Annie called our buddy Linda, who prayed for her over the phone who helped us refocus and brought some peace to our day. We were reminded that suffering is a part of God’s plan for us, as it will allow us to express His Truth to others. Last night was a peaceful night and I pray that today will be a peaceful day with Paul and the kids. I pray that your day will be peaceful, too. God Bless You All and don’t forget that He is there for you 24x7 and all you need to do is talk to Him.

Tuesday, September 03, 2002, Day 32, 10:40 PM
Yesterday and today were so busy. We were busy doing nothing on our day off from IPOP yesterday, vegging-out all day in front of the boob tube. We managed to watch 10 hours of Law & Order and a few hours of pure garbage. Annie felt so so but for the most part it was a good and boring day. No counts as we did not leave our apartment.

Today was much better all the way around. Annie was feeling really good and the counts were up again, over 1000. We picked Lily up in Brooklandville and Michele, Bobby, and Elise brought Kyle to the apartment while I picked-up Uncle Paul at BWI. Michele caught Annie up to what is happening in New Windsor and Paul, Bobby, and I talked about how we are all looking forward to retirement, Bobby being the closet and me probably next on the list. I know I want to retire from my current profession of caretaker, so I am rushing Annie to get well quickly. I saw Dr. Flinn today and he said if Annie continues to do great she may be discharged in two weeks rather than four!!! So, keep praying for us and we may be home sooner than you can say “Jumping Jack Flash”.

Great news, today. We so bored the new doctor at IPOP that he not only didn’t come to see us he told the nurses to tell us not to bother coming in tomorrow. Yeah!!! PTL!!!


Monday, September 2, 2002 Labor Day, Day 31, 8:00AM

At night before we retire I read Proverbs and the Psalms to Annie. There are 31 Proverbs, so we read the Proverb that corresponds to the day, so tonight we will read Proverb 2. On short moths we double-up at the end. We also read 5 Psalms so at the end of every month we have read the entire book, (you can do the math); Proverbs for Wisdom and Psalms for sweetness. It only takes about 15 minutes and it’s a great way to start or end the day. We learned about this from a couple who travel all over the country talking to kids and adults about making the right choices in life and being closer to God. When they visited Wakefield I was initially taken back by their “corniness”, but it didn’t take long to realize that this is their spiritual gift as they awakened many buried feelings in my brain and ignored passions of my heart, so by the end of their first hour I was appreciating why God sent them to us. God always has a purpose and these folks have been married to each other for 55 years!!! For the past 15 years they have traveled the country, living in a motor home, so God was showing me that it can be done….one can live with someone they love 24x7 in confined space and all they need to do to survive each other is to rely on Him. So…if these folks can do it for 5 years, surly Annie and I can do it for 60 days. We do it by depending on Him!!! God is and Gracious!!!

Today we have our first day off without having to go to or even near Weinberg and IPOP. Now, to you this may seem like no big deal, but to us it’s almost next to being in the islands for a week. Consider this; Annie has not been anywhere except our apartment, the garage at Park Charles and the garage at Weinberg since July 23rd, almost 40 days. She has not breathed fresh air or felt God’s sun in all of this time. I have been outside about 10 hours total since we arrived and trust me, I would never do the crime because no way could I ever do the time. We have learned many things since coming here, some of which I have shared with you and some that I plan to include in future writings, but I think what has hit us the hardest is not to take God’s creation for granted. I don’t care if it rains, sleets, hails, or blows, swelters, or shines; I will never take being alive for granted. Who cares about the weather when all you live in is an artificially controlled environment? So…like I told the lady in the elevator who ask how my day was going, I replied I have a great day whenever I open my eyes and know that I am awake on God’s planet. Or, when someone asks me how it is outside I smile and just rely, “its gorgeous outside” and walk away, as the rain taps merrily on the Weinberg skylights. Today we are off!!! It’s cloudy and gorgeous outside and in about 3 or 4 hours I am going to roust my little squirrel from her nest and take her for a walk around the block and I will truly know what heaven is all about.

Yesterday, mom and dad came to visit and it was payback time as dad and I tuned into the Southern 500 NASCAR race while Annie cringed as I do when she flips to “Weakest Link”. Oh, what sweet revenge, but we finally relented and turned the sound off. My dad is a big NASCAR fan and believe it or not he owned race cars in the 50’s, which ran against such greats as Lee Petty, Tony Bentenhauser, Junior Johnson, Joe Weatherly and Fireball Roberts at Darlington and some of the other major tracks that have been operating for over 50 years. He was president of NASCAR mid-Atlantic in 1953 and I still remember those great Friday nights when he would take me to the races. I told him yesterday that God willing it’s Daytona for us next year. Dad is being operated on tomorrow to remove a pesky gall bladder so if you can find a few minutes to pray for him I know the he would be most appreciative.

We also did something different relative to our IPOP visit yesterday and just ran over and had our blood drawn and immediately left, calling later for the results. Guess what? Annie wasn’t anywhere near as nauseous as she is when we have to hang out at the Weinberg. Today should prove our theory that what is making her feel bad is mostly the thought of being at IPOP. We don’t expect a complete turn around as her body has been fiercely assaulted for 40 straight days and it will more than likely take 6 moths for her to regain her total strength and overcome all of these changes that she has gone through since last December. In any event where she is today is nothing short of a miracle from God and should you have any doubts as to His hand in all of this I invite you to visit the Weinberg and see for yourself what this beast does to people and how difficult it is for most to overcome the effects of a transplant Almost to the person we can see the difference between those patients ho rely only on man and those who rely totally on God. It’s like our buddy Jerry said…I didn’t believe in anything before I came face to face with the “Big C” And now I truly believe that there is “God and He has touched me and healed me”. Jerry, who retired after 30 years in the Air Force, grew up as one tough hombre, but cancer brought him literally to his knees and today he is working to restore his life. God has laid it upon his heart that he needs to be with his 5 year old son in Spokane, so he’s packing up and moving 3000 miles west!!! God has truly Blessed Jerry and his son and we will be praying for them.

The newlyweds Sean and Jeana are visiting us today and we plan to have dinner with them at our apartment. We will also be treated to seeing the wedding pictures and Annie is very excited to have them over as it’s been awhile since we have seen anyone outside of the medical staff. “Pooh Bear”, Sean and Jeana have adopted this half basset hound half German Shepard or other big dog, who is not coming on this visit, although Annie really likes him she’s not ready for pets, yet. Pooh is the funniest looking dog we have ever seen, having such a big head on top of a little body, which makes him that waddle like a duck, but what a sweet dog he is. We’ll see him again next year.

Hope all is well with you and yours. God Bless You All and please keep praying for us. Have a great day.

Sunday, September 01, 2002 Day 30, Noon
Yesterday was a quickie day at IPOP. Checked the blood counts, visited Susan, and I went shopping while Sean and Annie came back to the apartment. Things are very quiet and quiet is like boring, which is good. Annie’s counts are holding steady and nothing else has changed. She has a great morning and as soon as she starts getting ready to go to IPOP she is overcome with queasiness. It’s a case of being tired of all of this stuff, but feeling good and wanting to home to New Windsor. It will come soon and we just have to wait on Him, so wait we will. We miss all of our faithful friends and can’t wait until we can start having folks over to our home and we can get back to living, especially sitting in on Pastor Horner’s messages, which we now can only hear by tape. It’s not the same, but it’s better than anything else this side of Wakefield Valley Bible Church. What a glorious day it will be when we can once again walk through the doors and take a seat.

Lily did not have a boring day yesterday as she and Ashley had their nails manicured and decorated, then they were off to Jamie’s party for Youth Group, which Lily has graduated to this year…PTL!!! After Jamie’s Lily treated Ashley to a wonderful Italian meal at the great Italian restaurant in Westminster, Paradisio. (I better see Lily soon or my debit card will have nothing left to debit!!!) Kyle is still at Duckie’s house and Mitch and Kathy threw a party for a bunch of friends that Kyle was really enjoying when we called him. Enjoy means they had plenty of food and Mountain Dew to go around. Grammy told us a story that when Kyle was in Pittsburgh several weeks ago they ate at Aunt Martha’s. Kyle wolfed down four helpings of brisket and they were all shocked that someone as svelte as he could eat 2 pounds of beef and all of the trimmings at one sitting, which I guess is why he is over 6 feet tall and 6 months shy of 14. I told Annie we probably saved a bundle by Kyle eating everywhere else but at our place this summer.

I can’t believe it is already September and Coach Frank just wrote to tell us that fall basketball is starting next week!!! Kyle is most excited to get back to work and if all goes well this season he may play next spring for Mt. Royal, an inner city team that is perennially ranked in the nation’s top 10. By that time we are praying that his number one fan will be courtside cheering him on. Can you guess who that is?

Uncle Paul hits town on Tuesday for a week. He and Aunt Kim, Cousins Shannon and Claire, live in Atherton, a nice suburb of San Francisco. Paul is a journalist, author, Pulitzer Prize finalist, and now the publisher of a great high tech magazine, CONTEXT (www.contextmag.com ). He is taking a week out of his busy schedule (He flies so much that his mileage is over 600,000 points!!) to come help out with the kids and to see his sister. (This is the kind of support we have been getting from all of our families and friends…and we thank God daily for giving us such great love) Paul and Kim are making a family move shortly as they are selling their Atherton home and will be looking for a home in Napa Valley. (I have offered to test all of the vineyard products to be sure they are up to par, too!!) While they are in this process the family will be living in their Lake Tahoe home. Kim and Paul will be home schooling the girls, or vice versa. Knowing these girls Kim and Paul will be learning a lot of new factoids themselves just as Annie and I do home schooling our two. (From what we have heard and what I gather from Annie, it appears that both Claire and Shannon have inherited Kim’s and Uncle Chuck’s smarts!!!) Speaking of Uncle Chuck, he recently took a position with Cray Computers and is taking the next week or so to learn all about super computers, before he hits town to visit us in mid September. I don’t know if Cray is a publicly traded company, but if it is and Chuck is working for them I recommend it as a “buy” as they are going to get a lot smarter and much better.

We’ll it’s that time now to head off for IPOP and see how we are doing so I will catch you up later, but in the meantime, God Bless You All and please keep praying for us and all of the folks that are battling this beast.


Saturday, August 31, 2002, Day 29, 7:00 AM
Gary’s Verse for Today
Who can find a virtuous wife?
For her worth is above rubies.
The heart of her husband safely trusts her;
So he will have no lack of gain.
She does him good and not evil
All the days of her life.
Proverbs 31:10-12
A virtuous wife is literally translated as a “wife of valor”, in the sense of all forms of excellence.

I am the most Blessed person that I know as God has given me a precious woman to share my life with and now that I am truly aware of just how Blessed I am, I am going to do just that and share all of the rest of my life with her. Guys, you need to take a few minutes to read Proverbs 31 and you too will see just how God has Blessed you with a virtuous woman that you need to honor and protect her for as long as you live. You will gain nothing better on this earth. For the guys who haven’t met or married that woman as yet, you need to pray, and ask all your family and friends to pray for you, that God will introduce you to the virtuous woman that he has made for you. I pray this for my sons, (one of whom has already found his woman), and it is a prayer that He answered for me with Annie, which for many years I didn’t really understand. Knowledge comes in many ways and I do understand this today, but I pray that you learn in a different way. Life is full of bumps, twists and turns, but honoring God and our virtuous woman, (our moms, too) in our life will keep us on a straight path.

But…..I CAN’T WAIT ANY LONGER TO TELL YOU THE NEWS!!!

Annie’s WBC broke 800 and the most important infection fighting Neutrophils broke 600!!! So…they kicked Annie out of True IPOP and made her a regular IPOP’r, which is the same as being released from the hospital from in-patient status to out-patient. Even though it won’t seem much different to us, it is a major difference in the course of treatment. It also signifies that we are almost assured of being sent home to New Windsor by the end of September, probably even sooner. God is Great!!! As you can probably tell, we are a little excited by this surprise. We met with the doctors and chief nurse, Wendy, and they all agreed that Annie is doing so well that it makes sense that she be released to a more relaxed treatment schedule. We may even get Monday off!!!!! Now, we only have to go to get blood count checks and the routine 20 questions. It gets better….the discontinued all of the antibiotics, which is probably the cause of her nausea. At this great news she made quick haste to the restroom to celebrate in glee. So…in a few days as her system unloads all of the garbage that has been stored-up Annie should be back to steak and pizza thrice weekly!!!

All the Glory belongs to God who gave us you in our lives, Johns Hopkins with its great doctors and nurses, and most importantly, He gave us Hope. Hope that one day the clouds will all be white and as I look out my window I can say that I must strain to see any grey.

OK…in the continuum of our battle with the beast, we are not totally out of the woods just yet; however we can easily see through the remaining trees. Now that Annie’s immune system can fight the demon infections that are bottled up inside of every person, but wreck havoc on people who are immune suppressed, we must deal with the real world dangers, which include some dreaded conditions like Aspergillosis, found in the dirt and especially in construction debris http://www.cdc.gov/ncidod/hip/pneumonia/1_asper.htm and Pneumocystis Carinii (PCP), also a fungi that is found internally in the body as well as in the environment http://www.dpd.cdc.gov/dpdx/HTML/Pneumocystis.htm. Both fungi are important causes of a deadly virile pneumonia in the immunocompromised person. Then there is Varicella-zoster virus (shingles or chicken pox) that may rear its head in the first 100 days post transplant, since Annie is no longer immunized against diseases although she has Tim’s marrow, she does not benefit from his immunity. And, because of the inherent dangers that vaccinations pose, Annie will not be re-vaccinated for at least one year post transplant. She is also still susceptible to Candida and Herpes Visrus, for the next several months, both of which are internal in the average person.

Then of course there is Graft versus Host Disease which can come in many forms and attack any organ in her body, so as you can surmise we still have many things to pray for, but we are many steps closer to being cured. For an interesting article and explanation of this phenomena see http://www.emedicine.com/derm/topic478.htm

Human beings are a most complicated organism, and I have learned so much over the past several months, yet I know nothing, except that only God, the Creator, could have made us, because anyone else would have taken many short cuts. Now that we are entering the next phase in the continuum we have much to be thankful for and much more to pray for. It will be a long time; perhaps even 6-9 months before Annie will be able to walk into a building or into a crowd without being masked and aware of what’s happening around her. She has a baby immune system today that needs to be trained in the same way as we train children so that one day she will function as you and I do. It isn’t much to give up for the cure!!! God Bless You All and have a great Labor Day weekend.

Friday, August 30, 2002, Day 28
Annie’s Verse for the Day
Behold, as the eyes of servants look to the hand of their masters,
As the eyes of a maid to the hand of her mistress,
So our eyes look to the Lord our God,
UNTIL He has mercy on us.
One of life’s more difficult tasks is waiting. Waiting on news, waiting on food from waiters, waiting in line at the grocery store, waiting at stop lights, children waiting until mom and dad are up on Christmas Day….no one likes to wait. We want it now!!! But, God being God does things in His own time, especially answering prayers. He tells us not to be anxious as He knows what we need, and sometimes I think when knowing this we still remain anxious, He takes a bit longer to answer us. It’s only when we become totally reliant and trusting in God that our anxieties fall by the wayside, and waiting does not produce such anxiety. Oswald Chambers writes that as we look to Him, our knowledge of His countenance is gained (Isaiah 53:1) and no matter how long it may take we need to stay focused on Him and not fall back to man. Just yesterday I was talking with Annie and she was saying that she was a bit worried that she hasn’t been visited with GVHD as yet and was wondering why. I looked at her and said I don’t think God wants us to fret about this and He has shown this by answering all of our prayers so very quickly, so why should we be worried about this. No sooner than these words passed from me to her the little anxiety just went away. God knows that sometimes we will start to worry and when we do we just need to look into His eyes and trust Him. Subliminally satan is working on us all of the time to both destroy our peace with each other and more importantly destroy our relationship to him, which is why he is referred to as the “destroyer” in many versions of the Bible. I know what satan was saying to Annie, and I admit for a few seconds I was listening, too. Several days ago we met a woman who was doing a second DLI (Donora Leukocyte Infusion). DLI is a procedure where stem sells are collected from the original transplant donor and re-infused to the patient, in hopes of jump starting the patient’s immune system and killing the cancer that is still in the body. These are typically done, where there is no GVHD post transplant and the patient relapses. It’s a scary thought, and being her second DLI, the patient knows that if this doesn’t work they will have to undergo another transplant. Obviously, subliminally, satan infused Annie’s mind with this knowledge so that she would get anxious and worry. Well, he lost that battle but we know he will keep trying so all we can do is keep praying and trusting Him. Of course, we cheated as we know that God wins over satan in the end, since it is written in the last Book of the Bible, Revelation, in verse 22:13, where Jesus tells us the end; “I am the Alpha and the Omega, THE Beginning and THE End, the First and the Last.”

OK, you have waited long enough. Yesterday, I witnessed something that I never thought I would see. Our reserved, quite, young Fellow Yvette Hi-5’d me when I related Annie’s numbers to her. Furthermore she danced for Annie in great excitement as her WBC was 670 and Neutrophils most 300!!! I truly believe they are going to kick us out next week and Praise God for His Mercy and Faithfulness. How exciting for my bride knowing that God is working in our lives to bring us closer to Him and if it be His will, curing her of this terrible beast. What a joyful time was had by all, despite the daily nausea bouts.

Today we see the GVHD nurse, which in my mind is a bit premature, but Yvette, being new and trying to be thorough, wants to check-out some pinkness on Annie’s skin. Since the nurse comes every Friday to visit IPOP anyway we all figured “what the heck” and I know we will learn something new, which is always worthwhile and only God know, maybe she has the touch we are praying for. We’ll let you know what the nurse says tonight.

Today is another milestone in parenting. Our daughter Lily who is 11, going on 35, is heading off to Gettysburg with Ashley our friends’ Donna and Randy Meyers 17 year old daughter. Ashley is the only 17 year old young lady that we know to trust in this adventure, as she is a most wonderful and conscientious teenager, the kind of girl every parent wants there son to marry one day. Lily is having such a marvelous time staying with Ashley this week; she doesn’t even need to come see us. This makes us really happy because if she is having such a grand time it means that she is not missing us so and when we see her next week it will be joyful for all. It is also scary as she has our debit card to buy school stuff at the Outlets, but she reassured us last night that she will use it “wisely”. So…this summer our children are learning a lot about life. Maybe not in the way that we envisioned, but in the way God has planned it, so it must be the better way.
Kyle is hanging with his buddy “Duckie” . Kyle tells us that Duckie’s place is the place to be as his parents, Mitch and Kathy are really “cool” and feed him all that he wants to eat whenever he wants to eat and take him and Duckie anywhere they want to go. It also helps that they have a DVD collection bigger than Blockbuster as well as pool tables and all of the other things to keep one in kid heaven. (I am going to see if they need a house sitter some time in the future as I sure want to live a bit of the good life at the movies, which we didn’t have growing up in the 50’s and 60’s) God Bless Kathy and Mitch and all of the wonderful friends that have just made this tine in our lives so much better than we could have ever hoped for. We’ll see you all real soon, too!!!

God Bless You All and have a safe and wonderful Labor Day weekend.


Wednesday, August 28, 2002 Day 26
Speaking of milestones, Annie broke 500 WBC’s today meaning that we are half-way to being discharged from True IPOP to IPOP. Even more importantly, in my opinion, Annie’s platelet production has begun and she is now making all of her necessary blood cells. Her neutrophils are 150, a bit low in the ratio to WBC’s but holding steady and they too should begin to rise shortly. Additionally, her Hematocrit is holding so her red cells are strong and heady. So…Annie seems to have adapted very well to Tim’s system….Way to Go, Tim!!! She is still fighting little bouts of nausea and some tiredness, but that is to be expected considering all of the antibiotics that she is taking.

The rest of the day also included a visit to Susan to see how she is going at Day 1. She was bright and cheerful, a bit nauseated but looking ahead with anticipation of making her numbers, too. Susan is a golfer so after they are discharged I am sure she and Annie will be planning an outing. Speaking of golf outings Chica Jane has lined up a date for Tim to play at the beautiful Caves Valley Golf Club, where the recent Senior PGA Tournament was held. Way to go Chica Jane!!!

Afterwards we went home and Annie slept until Weakest Link came on while I worked on some business stuff and made my famous Dijon Shrimp Salad Cajun Style, trimmed out with fresh California avocado. (She’s not that nauseated!!!) More work, more TV and little else. We are dull, dull, dull people and dull is boring and boring is….

God Bless You All and please keep prying for very mild GVHD for GVL effect and for protection from various infections and fungal attacks.

Wednesday Morning, August 28, 2002 Day 26
Annie’s Verse for the Day
But rejoice to the extent that you partake of Christ's sufferings, that when His glory is revealed, you may also be glad with exceeding joy. 1 Peter 4:13

Oswald Chambers writes that "God's way is always the way of suffering, the way of the 'long, long trail'" Last night Annie and I prayed for an old friend of mine from work that I haven’t seen for 25 years. He and his wife, who have been married to each other for over 30 years and are suffering greatly from this beast. Today they are going for a CT scan to determine if the cancer has stabilized. These are trips of great anguish, which people in situations like ours must take every few weeks or months and I know from my own experience that hope is always at the maximum during the ride there. Joy is finding that nothing has changed or better yet things are even better than expected. But joy can be much more than what is happening in our lives today, for joy knows that God is with us every step of the way in all that we do and regardless of the outcome of today, He will one day heal our all of suffering. It’s His promise to those who believe in Him and this realization always brings joy and hope into our lives.

Monday was day 25, another milestone in our relatively boring lives. Why is 25 a milestone? There is no particular reason other than everyday to me is a milestone. I have been working on a letter to God telling Him how He has Blessed us this year. I began it with a few thoughts and it’s beginning to feel like War and Peace. I hope to share this with you in the next several weeks so you will get a sense of what our peace is all about.

OK, so Annie’s number was 480!! It’s still heading in the right direction and we are praying that it will continue down this path. We are being much more consistent that the DOW and consistency is good. Yesterday we were talking to a BMT buddy who has set the goal of when they will go home and Annie told her that she has no goal other than one more day…another milestone. Some of you may question how she can live with no anxiety during this most trying time, and I must admit for a long time I too was suspect of her façade…but, I no longer question her peace as I too have come to the same plateau and it is all because of getting to know Him better and trust. Do I know for sure that all of this is so…nope, but I believe it to be and this is how I choose to live my life and I can assure you regardless of what I learn tomorrow I know my today will be one of joy. After all, who can say anything sure about tomorrow? We can’t even say that the sun will rise for sure, but we have faith that it will.

Something else I learned yesterday about fear is that fear makes people nicer. I have probably met several hundred people at the Weinberg since July 22nd and everyone has been nice, courteous, and will go out of their way to help with anything. So it is true that people are inherently good, it’s just that sometimes our lives get in the way of our goodness. So…when you get up any morning from the wrong side of your bed, just take a second to realize that you are getting up from your bed. Have a great day and if you are in the vicinity of Howard County you see a crazed looking 6 foot tall 13 year boy in combat gear shooting a machine gun in the drives have no fear it’s just Kyle and his paint balling buddies making war. Oh, to be 13 again. God Bless You all.

Tuesday Morning, August 27, 2002 Day 25
Annie’s Verse for the Day
But Joshua said to the people, “you cannot serve the Lord, for He is a Holy God. He is a jealous God; He will not forgive your transgressions nor your sins”
Joshua 24:19

Perhaps we did not believe strong enough that God is in control and that He wanted us to know that He is. I think back over the past year’s events in our lives and I can see His hands working in our lives to bring us closer to Him and take us farther away from ourselves; lest how could we ever serve Him, when all we thought about was how “we” are going to fix things or do things. He wants us to rely totally on Him for everything and when we do He takes care of everything. I was telling another patient yesterday how easy this entire time has been for us because we just looked to God and trusted Him. We believe that He is going to cure Annie, but more importantly we believe that He is the one true and only God of the universe and His Son , who came to earth to set us free, is the Alpha and the Omega, the beginning and the end and lives where we one day will be together in eternity. Oswald Chambers puts it like this. “The point is not to say, ‘If I really could believe!’ The point is if I really WILL believe. We want to allow Him to be to us what He says will be.” And, the more we allow ourselves to allow Him the easier our lives become. Annie and I have total and absolute faith that He is taking us where we need to go and if it means we are going there without cancer in our lives that’s great, but if it means that we may not be without cancer, we still want to go and it’s great to know that we will go there together and be with each other, always.

The episodes ended yesterday afternoon and last night was a great evening and even my spaghetti sauce appealed to Annie as well as the proverbial mashed potatoes. So it appears that this binge of nausea may be subsiding and that we will be entering the next phase in our journey, where Graft versus Host will be our primary physical concern. As I have said before we are praying for a bit of GVHD, but only a little. I have no reason to think it won’t go this way, God willing, as He surely has been answering yours and our prayers with a resounding YES! So, we are hoping this will be our next plateau.

I don’t usually quote numbers, but just to give you an idea of how well Annie has progressed, her WBC numbers for that past 5 days were: 240, 270, 290, 390, 410; like the story goes the tortoise will win!! So…our days are like this. We get up, get dressed, eat, go to IPOP, bore the doctors and nurses and ourselves for an hour or so, get our numbers, get our evening medications, go see our buddy Susan on the floor, then come back to the apartment to wait and see what tomorrow brings. I think we will soon be able to add some exercise to our day as Annie appears to be getting much stronger.

I was planning a dinner party for 20 guests for Sunday, but Annie nixed that idea when she found out that TNT is running a 24 hour Law & Order marathon beginning at 5 pm, (Thank You O God that it isn’t The Weakest Link), so she told me absolutely no visitors! Sorry guys. Apart from the lack of episodes, I know Annie is feeling better as she actually reached for the channel changer on the table. This is her time to do nothing and nothing she does and the less she does the happier I am because it gives her more strength for the important things in our lives, like making new WBC’s. I know that this is a time in my life that God is teaching me to serve and I have enjoyed every minute. It used to be that even talking about episodes of nausea would send me running to the loo, but now not only do I take care of Annie’s episodes I also took care of our friend yesterday who lost it in the lobby. God does have a sense of humor!

Life is easy when one is sure of what there day will be, barring any unforeseen trucks or buses on the way to IPOP. Unlike most folks Annie and I know what we will be doing all day and all night, which is extremely boring, but boring, is good. One exciting thing that occurred yesterday is that our nurse changed our Cyclosporine 100mg horse pills to liquid, which I mix with chocolate milk, so it’s much easier to get it down without any episodes that would require retaking. Now you know how boring it is.

Annie’s brother Paul will be in town for a week to hang out with us and the children. This is exciting as the kids don’t get to see much of their west coast uncle. We leased a new apartment at the Park Charles for the 1st so the kids can move in, so they all may stay here or in New Windsor or both places off and on. Our insurance stops paying for our vacation home in several days, unless Hopkins justifies why Annie can’t be released to out patient status, which even I couldn’t finesse seeing how well that she is doing. After that time I must pay for it and they will reimburse us, I hope, until Hopkins says Annie can go home to New Windsor, which should be around September 30th, God Willing. So, we leased a two bedroom that is directly across form our current apartment as there will be several days overlap and then we will be re-united as FAMILY….YES!!! I know the kids are tired of shuffling around, no matter how exciting it has been there is no place like home.

Brother Chuck is coming to town in mid September. He is Annie’s oldest brother and has just taken a job with Cray Computer, the super computer folks who run wars and nuclear havoc with their stuff. Chuck is going to help them become more super. We also expect sisters Katy and Amy to join us sometime soon, too. Martha might come for a weekend and Kyle wants her to bring the Porsche since Erik taught him how to shift gears last weekend. Kyle has been bitten by the “car bug” so I told him when mommy gets stronger and she can deal with crowds he can take her to a NASCAR race, which I know will speed her recovery since she is such a great fan of NASCAR….NOT!!!

Have a great day as I must get my darling wife up and out of here to IPOP. Pray for a boring day for us and no more episodes except for Law & Order.


Sunday Afternoon, August 25, 2002 4:05PM
Tiger slammed a sweet shot on the 7th hole today as Annie’s WBC count zoomed from 290 to a tad under 400!!! This caps a great week of the tortoise catching up to the rabbit. We all know how the race ends so I need not tell you. It actually took us longer to get dressed and ready to do to IPOP then we stayed there once we had arrived. This is good and nobody is concerned by the little rashes that pop up on Annie’s ankles or the several daily tummy episodes, so I guess we are really a boring couple, and believe it or not that’s the way the nurses like it as do we. I am not too sure about the doctors’ true feelings as they do get paid for research and nobody pays too much for boring research, but I think when they look at us as individuals they are happy and we do make for good outcomes as we skew their statistics for a more positive outcome. Statistics are good if you are a researcher. It’s an interesting world; case in point, the clinical trial in which Annie is participating has been ongoing for over 10 years, since the FDA has yet to approve this particular protocol for indolent (slow growing) cancers. So….this means that the data that is being generated is not being officially reported to the public, but privately the study director, Dr. Jones, tells us that after two years they have not had a allo relapse (This is also true of other cancer center studies for indolent lymphoma.), which was a primary decision factor in deciding on this protocol.

On our way out of IPOP we stopped by to see our buddy Susan, who was partying with some of her hometown buddies. She looked great and was feeling fine after six days of chemo poison. Her eyes lit up when I told her I make great lasagna, so tomorrow I will be in the kitchen fixing her a meal that will put even her $30 Marburg dinner to shame. No Chianti though.

Guys, thanks for all of your prayers and please keep on praying as we are now moving into the Graft vs. Host time period and are praying only for a Grade I (or II) GVHD that will kill any lymphoma that may be lurking in Annie’s body. Stay away Grades III, and IV. But, God is in control and we aren’t so no reason for worry in the Gamber house. God Bless You all real good.

Sunday. August 25, 2002 Day 23 8:00AM
ANNIE’S Verse for the Day
“Be still, and know that I am God”
Psalm 46:10

Annie and I have has gotten our “call for spiritual tenacity” (Oswald Chambers) where we have moved from endurance to absolute certainty that what we are looking for will transpire. It’s remarkable how calm and patient Annie has been waiting everyday for the news about where we are in our numbers, but as one grows to know God even better, patience is not the issue but our tenacity to have God control our lives without fear versus the devil penetrating our thoughts with undue concern. God will always be victorious and that is where he, satan, will always fail, so why allow him into our lives at all because he is a loser and this is a battle that the end has already been written by Him.

We had sad news yesterday as Mr. Raphael, the oldest BMT patient, lost his decade battle with the beast and was laid to rest. Our hearts and prayers go out to his son Brett and the rest of his family. Joel Raphael was a fighter, a tenacious man, who never gave up, even when all others did. At the age of 50 he went back to school and learned how to be an emergency medical technician and for 15 years helped save lives in crises. Joel did not die from his cancer but rather from an old heart condition that weakened him to a point where he could no longer flail away at the multiple assaults on his body. God Bless him and I pray that his family will be comforted by his “tenacity” and spirit.

Saturday, August 24, 2002 Day 22 Midnight

I can only say that Annie had a much better day today than the Orioles did, dropping a double header to the Blue Jays. In fact, it was a real good day as nothing spectacular occurred. Again, her numbers are creeping the right way (Go, Tim, Go!!!) and her nausea has subsided, (PTL!!!). She still has her two bouts of 5 minute sickness and goes back to business, so we are going to quite “tinkering” with her medications today and let God and nature take its course. When we look at what could have happened during this past 30 days and compare to what actually happened, God has been more than merciful. Because of your prayers and petitions, Annie has had only one fever, one night in the hospital, no mouth sores, one hour of abdominal upset, a few days of minor nausea, several episodic eruptions from the tummy, no GI tract invasions or pain, a little swollen feet and hands, no fainting, and little fatigue….little or now side effects from a regime that poisoned her near death and let loose a myriad of pests in her system when her immune system was destroyed. A walk in the park…NO…but is has been a wonderful peaceful journey knowing God is with us every step of the way. Thanks for your prayers and thanks to Him for His mercy. Our patience will not go unrewarded.

Zoe and the kids arrived from there visit with Aunt Jen and I left taking all of the kids to Lil Jon’s party, leaving Zoe behind with Annie. It’s been a great time this week and Annie and I have been so Blessed by Zoe, Emily, and Nathan. What a wonderful reminder the kids are to great parenting and Zoe and Chuck are great ones and you can see how devoted they are to Emily and Nathan. We’re praying that Emily will come to our area to attend college in 2003 so we can have more of her and it seems as if she is leaning this way for now.

The party was a grand affair with a Mexican culinary theme. Oh well…how can one say no to jalapeño poppers and home made tacos smothered in refried beans. I ate a few then and ate a few more in the middle of the night with Dr. Bicarb. It was great seeing the entire family and I got tons of hugs for Annie and she was missed by all. Lil Jon was in great spirits as were the rest of the Ritt and Gamber clan. Needless to say, pride was a big expression on all of our faces as we sent him off to do battle for us. Osama, you better watch out as Jon is going for Ranger status and may just jump on your bones!!! On thing they won’t have to teach Lil Jon is how to shoot a rifle as he was born with a gun in his hands and Kyle and I spent many good times with him and his dad out in the field. See you in December, Jon!!!

While we were at the party Annie and Zoe spent three hours “girl talking”, motherhood and all that jazz. I know Annie shared her recent journey with Zoe as well as how our faith has kept us on the smooth road. When we got home they were still in great animation and I know they had a wonderful time together. I also notice that Zoe had taken a whack or two at my medicinal stock of red wine. She had the same medical advice as I did, which is a glass a day is good for the heart and it doesn’t hurt the soul as well. It’s good to see that there are wise doctors in Minneapolis, too. When I asked Annie’s Dr. Flinn if an occasional or daily glass of red wine was good for Annie everyday he told me that he felt it was, but it had to be “good wine”, implying that I was buying stuff that is just one cut above cooking varieties. But to me red is red, so Annie is sticking with her pure 100o anything added “Just Grape” juice, ( by RW Knudsen http://www.knudsenjuices.com/ sold at Fresh Fields and some other fine gourmet stores…only $6 per bottle), which has all of the same medicinal qualities of the best reds without the fermented after effects or a $20 price tag. Dr. Flinn is actually doing a study underwritten by NIH as to the benefits of red wine used medicinally in cancer treatment. It seems that resveratrol an element found in red grapes can help in cell destruction maintenance.

{RESVERATROL-the presence of too much NF kappa B tends to decrease the activity of gene P53, which may be a factor in NHL (lymphoma) transformation to higher grade. NF kappa B also appears to block apoptosis, and may even be a factor in blocking spontaneous regression, which may be a predictor of long term survival. At least two natural "foods" that claim to reduce NF kappa B. These are fish oils from fish feeding on plankton while at sea and resveratrol, from grapes and red wine. Fish oil and red wine may not go well together, (unless it's Chilean Sea Bass, and a good Merlot, which doesn't count), but one in the morning, one in the evening...who knows, life could be worse.)}

Looking forward to another boring Sunday. Hope yours is more exciting.


Friday, August 23, 2002 Day 21 8:19 PM

Annie figured it up tonight that on Sunday we will have been here 5 weeks and although time does fly we can’t wait to get back to old boring New Windsor. Dr. Levis, who is a Dick Cavett look alike and has a very glib sense of humor stopped by to see us this morning. No one can seem to figure why we can set our watch to Annie getting sick. Although quality of life has been much better for her since we applied the seasickness patch, but like clockwork she gets sick for a few minutes twice daily, around noon and 5 PM. So Dr, Levis and Fellow Yvette are going to “tinker around” a bit more with Annie’s drugs tomorrow and see if they can’t get her fixed. Yvette is prescribing a daily IV infusion of Zofran to replace the pills. At $300 a squirt our insurance agent will probably blow his lunch when he gets their “tinkering” bill. God Bless Golden Rule Insurance!!! My theory is that this entire auto purging will subside in next 10 days when Annie breaks the big M barrier (1000).

Today was our shortest day at the Weinberg as we arrived at 10:15 and left before noon. Nothing happened today but a few pokes and a few jokes and the first half of our daily double. Plus the good news was still good as Annie’s counts are holding strong. On Saturday Dr. Platelet will visit us with a bag of platelets for Annie. I actually met him today on B Pavilion and he looks just like you would imagine one to look who spends their day delivering blood products…a regular Bella Lugosi.

Yvette was very chipper and excited by her parents coming to visit this weekend from Pittsburgh. They have planned a day trip to Ocean City on Sunday, which to me sounds as inviting as a vacation on the Rivera…anywhere but the Weinberg on the Weekend. The toughest part about our regime is that it is a daily one with no breaks and no overtime pay either, but at least it’s a change of scenery. Of course, our current situation will change after Annie engrafts and we drop to every other day visits to IPOP, which will until we transfer home to Dr. Kruter’s care in Carroll County sometime in October.

We had a special surprise today as we were on our way to the bank in Canton when we called mom only to learn that she and Lily along with my sister Debbie and her daughter Olivia and our friend Kathy and her daughter Casey were at the Petticoat Tea Room, which was about two blocks from us in Fells Point. We parked and went in to say Hi to everyone and Annie joined the gang for lunch while I went to the bank. It was a cute site seeing all of these girls yakking away with Annie trying to slurp a club soda through her face mask. A great time was had by all and I was so happy seeing real human beings not in a hospital that I picked up the tab as my way of saying thanks for taking such great care of Lily.

We came back to our apartment, paid our bills, and Annie vegged out watching her favorite game shows while I ironed shirts. On these days I feel like Divine must have felt in Hairspray as she ironed Tracy’s pantaloons and other garments while watching the “Buddy Dean” show. A fellow Marylander won $50000 on Jeopardy during teen week, plus he got a brand new Mitsubishi Spyder convertible as a bonus. The young man doesn’t have his license yet, but his daddy sure looked happy as the camera panned the audience. I don’t know what will be harder to wean Annie from when we go home, TV or mashed potatoes with butter half and half and cheddar cheese. Maybe I’ll just order cable and buy a cow.

We’ll it’s about that time so I am signing off and hitting the sack to prepare for what I pray will be a very boring Saturday morning. God Bless You All and have a great weekend.


Thursday Evening, August 22, 2002 Day 20 6:06 PM
Annie’s Verse of the Day
Let them that suffer according to the will of God,
Commit the keeping of their souls to Him in well-doing, as
To a faithful Creator
1 Peter 4:19

Boring is the name of this game and boring it was today. We got off to a great start this morning, got to IPOP on time for a change and drew “Nurse Happy” (Laurie) as our nurse for the day, which is always fun. Annie got her 2 one hour infusions of antibiotics and 2 bags of red blood cells. It was so boring that she slept through most of the day, except for a few minutes talking to our buddy Larry who stopped by to have lunch with me. Larry is a lawyer in the Baltimore law department and handles most of the new large development projects for the City. We became friends almost 20 years ago when I was working on the Baltimore Renaissance in the early 80’s, a most exciting time in the history of our town.

The nausea seems to be subsiding and the only time her stomach seems to get upset is around lunch time and dinner time, although tonight so far there has been no indication that the pattern is continuing…PTL!! Annie’s counts are still holding on tightly in the mid 200’s but the most encouraging news was that her neutrophils have increased as mature white blood cells. So….it’s day by day and soon after the engraftment is completed we will be on an every other day schedule at IPOP and watching for graft issues. It is a most amazing process, the destruction of the body and its restoration. God sure has done a wondrous job in designing our bodies to talk great punishment and then heal as Annie is healing.

We are looking forward to another boring weekend as the kids are coming back on Saturday, not that they are boring, but we sure are. Zoe will hang with Annie and catch-up on life’s passages, while we all go to my nephew’s going into the Army party on Saturday. When the terrorist get a look at “Little” John staring them in the face they will all pack up and flee for the caves. “Little” John is about 6’4” and 275 lbs of solid steel, who also happens to have a 100 fast ball and left handed curve pitch. We are all so proud of him that he has decided to serve our Country and he will serve it well.

I was smart last night and cooked up a pot of spaghetti sauce made from the rest of my sister Deanna’s tomatoes, with fresh portabella mushrooms that I serve over string zucchini instead of pasta to conserve carbs. I also took half and made chicken cacciatore using Cornish game hens instead of chicken, which is a bit extravagant except they were on sale yesterday for half price and thought we deserved a treat. I think we are actually saving money but nor being able to go out to dinner and if I do say so myself there are only a few restaurants in this town that can compete with my cacciatore sauce.

Wish you guys could join us and I am praying real hard that I haven’t spoken too soon about Annie’s tummy. See you guys later and God Bless You All.

Thursday Morning, August 22, 2002 Day 20 8:21 AM
I need to make this quick as we must get ready to go to IPOP. Annie could see the shore last night and I think we will land today. It’s interesting that I keep thinking she was acting as if she was seasick and yesterday after consulting with all of he doctors and nurses it was decided to try a seasick patch. We didn’t get it on until late so the four hour waiting period was around bedtime. However, she was back to true form and on the phone to family much of the evening. Her counts are still hovering the 200 range and we are taking them one day at a time as we know they will eventually be where we want them. For the most part yesterday was extremely boring and boring is good. We don’t expect a much different day today except she will be given a red blood cell transfusion sometime in the morning as she hit the arbitrate 25 Hematocrit yesterday. Her platelets are hanging in but I expect a bag or two will be sent up by Dr. Platelet today or Friday. The other good news is that she is tolerating all of her oral drugs and the doctors decided to cut back her cyclosporine horse pills to 2 per dose which is twice each day. This will probably cure her inflamed feet that make her feel as if she is running the race in flats.

Zoe and the kids are doing great in New Windsor and they explored beautiful downtown Westminster today. This afternoon they leave for Arlington to visit aunt Jen and Uncle Erik and to hang out with Isaac and Aidan for the day. If all continues to go as well as it has I will probably go to my new office in Reston on Friday and pick them up.

Thanks for all of the great messages, cards and emails that we have been getting. Your prayers are working miracles. Off we go to hit the day and hopefully it’s “Land-Ho” for sure!!!

Wednesday, August 21, 2002 Day 19 8:00AM

Annie’s Verse Today
Behold. He is coming with clouds, and every eye will see Him, even those who pierced Him. And all of the tribes of earth will mourn because of Him. Even so, Amen.
“I am the Alpha and the Omega, the Beginning and the End.” Says Lord Jesus, “who is and who was and who is to come, the Almighty.”
Revelation 1:7-8

Faith to me, simply put, is that I believe in something that I do not know for sure is or will happen, but I believe. My faith is that it’s the Lord’s will that Annie be cured and this faith has never wavered since the day we walked through the Weinberg doors. I am not saying that I didn’t drop to my knees, cry, beg, throw things, or whimper at times before July 22nd, because I did. However, in all of my tantrums, I tried to focus on Him and all of the wondrous things that He has done in my life since I found Him or He found me, whatever your perspective may be. I was asked recently, “How would you explain your faith if it didn’t go your way?” I thought for a bit and replied that if it is His will that it will be done, it will be done and to which is my faith. I always need to keep in perspective that it is His plan and not mine which is important, as His plan is forever and for most of my life my plan has been for only today. But, July 22nd changed all of that for me. We must expect some clouds in our lives, but as I look back at my life I believe that it is the clouds that helped me learn and appreciate everything life is all about. I can assure you that each time I think my clouds are the darkest clouds I am quickly brought to reality when I look at others who are here at the Weinberg, especially those who are wrestling with this beast without God in their corner.

Oswald Chambers writes in “The Utmost for the Highest” “It is not true to say that God wants to teach us something in our trials: through every cloud that He brings, He wants us to UNLEARN something. His purpose in the cloud is to simplify our belief until our relationship to Him is exactly that of a child to Him–God and my own soul…..”

When Annie was first diagnosed we were fraught to tell our children the news. One afternoon, I was driving somewhere with our son Kyle when I asked him out of the blue, “Buck, are you worried about mommy and this cancer thing?” He replied in his cut and dry but very profound manner, “No, mommy will be OK as she has some good doctors and an Awesome God” Out of the mouth of children….what more can I say about faith.

God Bless You and I pray that you will have a great day today and have faith that it will be “Land-Ho”

Tuesday, August 20, 2002 Day 18 Midnight

Annie’s Verse Today
Jesus says to all;
Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.
Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and
You will find rest for your souls.
For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.
Matthew 11:28-30 I pray that we can give Him our burden and that He will carry us through



We are still waiting for Annie to get her sea legs, but we can see land over the horizon and we should touch shore sometime soon. For the most part the only potentially serious complication to nausea is dehydration, which can impact her kidneys’ function. Fortunately, between hearty breakfasts and mashed potatoes at dinner time and lots of Canada Dry Ginger Ale all day long she is getting enough calories. It seems as if the nutritionist doesn’t care how she gets calories, but that she does. Today we are going to take a whack at some hi-protein hi-calorie Dreamery shakes that Tara, our nutritionist, suggested that we try. We will also ratchet-up her fluid intake and she should land on dry sand very shortly. This morning Christa, our nurse, ran a bag of water for an extra hour to give some high quality hydration. (Just when I think we have had the best, the next nurse is even better. I really must take my hat off to the folks that do the hiring around this place, as each one of our nurses could be starters on a super bowl winning team) Also, there seems to been an interesting pattern to Annie’s day. In the morning she feels great but as we approach IPOP you can tell in her eyes that she is beginning to feel queasy. Then the only time she seems to loose it, and she is two for two in this category, is when the doctor pokes her in the belly. In the morning we are going to try looking at things with a bit more faith that it will be “Land-Ho” on Wednesday. So I hope everyone is praying for Annie to get her sea legs and in a few days this will all be just a “fond” memory. The most important issue that we forget about in all of our pain is that her body is responding to the transplant as her red blood was holding steady yesterday after Monday’s infusion and MOST IMPORTANT, according to Dr. Levis, is her WBC is still on the up swing and the neutrophils are climbing….just as they are supposed to do, one day at a time. Praise God for the important things and we’ll let Canada Dry and Nurse “Happy” (she brings us Ativan) do the rest. God Bless You All!!

Ps I apologize for not calling folks back today, but it was really hectic and I got so many calls I just turned the phone off. I will do better on Wednesday, I promise!!!

Monday, August 19, 2002 Day 17 7:25 PM
The Lord’s Prayer is a prayer that many of us learn as children, which seems to stay in our minds all of our lives, no matter how far away we move from Him we always seem to be able to recall His exact words. It is a model prayer that says all that we need to ask for.
The Lords Prayer
Our Father in heaven, hallowed is your name.
Your Kingdom come, Your will be done,
On earth as it is in heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread,
And forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors;
And do not lead us into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one.
For Yours is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever.
Amen
Matthew 6:9-13

Today went really well and I think we have come up with a good solution relative to the seasickness periods that Annie has been experiencing in the afternoons. We have designed a new program that includes plenty of rest, exercise, some great nausea medication and prayer, with prayer being foremost. We have done this with the help of our able doctors and nurses at IPOP. The medical people keep reminding us that they are pumping in 910 different drugs into Annie’s system and that in itself would bring Jesse Ventura to the matt. As soon as her counts hit 1000 WBC and 500 ANC she will get off all but 2 or 3 of them. So….the solution is not a case of bravery, or toughing it out, but rather one of waiting out the ups and downs of bone marrow transplants. Annie has done so well that amazement is a trivial word to describe just how well she has done. So…in a few days things will level out and we will be that much closer to the magic number.

Dr. Levis is very pleased with Annie’s progress in making new white blood cells and neutrophils as her numbers have been climbing steadily the past three days, so the pattern is good and solid for quick recovery. Tomorrow they will be doing a special blood test to measure her cyclosporine levels to determine the correct dosage and her absorption level. We need to be certain that she is getting the proper amount of medication into her system, which is more difficult when drugs are taken orally. So this is a good prayer before retiring tonight.

Another amazing thing occurred today and if you have ever doubted or questioned the hand of God in our journey this will end all such speculation. I had to be at the airport ton pick up Zoe and the kids today at 10:45. I left the apartment garage at 10:20 and hit every green light and got to the airport non stop at 10:46. I parked in the garage and their flight which was scheduled to land at 10:48 actually touched down at 10:46. I was standing at baggage when the clan showed-up at 10:55. The bagged showed-up at 11:05. We walked back to the garage and left before the grace period expired ended, which was due to expire at 11:16, without owing a dime as the first 1/2w hour is free parking!!! Now, we are talking miracles of miracles. We arrived home so soon that we caught Annie by surprise before she had gotten herself IPOP ready. So off Kyle, Annie and I went to IPOP and Zoe, Lily, Nathan, and Emily set off for a day at the harbor, including a visit to the world’s largest and most famous aquarium.

We got back from IPOP and ordered pizzas and all had a great time noshing. We hugged and kissed and said our “see you laters”, then off the gang went, heading for home in New Windsor. It is such a treat to have Zoe and the kids in town for the week and I know Kyle and Lily will have a ball.

God Bless You All for your faithfulness. Please keep praying for us and we will see you all next spring in New Windsor!!!

Give thanks for how god has protected us and how he has worked in our lives!!!!!
Give thanks for our hero, Tim!!!!!
Give thanks for our family and for yourselves because without you talking to God He may not have such an open ear.
Pray that Annie is absorbing her Cyclosporine.
Pray that Annie will engraft soon.
Pray that we continue to grow closer to God.
Pray that our family is protected during our time apart.
Pray that Annie experiences little Graft versus Host, but does get a Graft versus Lymphoma effect.
Pray that Annie experiences limited side effects from all of the treatment
Pray that Annie will be protected from fevers and infections
Pray that we will have the resources to see this thing through without worry
Pray that Bamboo Solutions will continue to grow and prosper
Pray that Annie will be CURED and that we will be together for many years living our lives for Him.

Sunday, August 18, 2002 Day 16 11:00 PM
Today was absolutely boring and wonderful!!! I think the doctors, especially our star Fellow, Yvette, have solved Annie’s seasickness journey. Yevette, with John’s able input, decided to prescribe the miracle drug Zofran and added a “take as needed” (PRN) drug, Reglan. This combination seems to work and along with the Ativan, Annie was feeling quite chipper by early evening. She and Lily watched Nicholas Cage in “Family Man” with Lily while I got the house from looking like Oscar’s home to Felix’s abode after having a mini dinner party with Sean and Russell.

Family Man is one of my favorite movies as it details the two sides to a man’s life, one is about the rich man who thinks he has everything but in reality has nothing and the other is about a man who thinks he has nothing but has everything and is truly rich. This story mirrors much of my own life as for many years I used the excuse that I was working 26 hours everyday for “them’. Them is my family and if you haven’t realized it as yet, “them” don’t care about how much you work and how rich you become and how much they get for Christmas, “them” only cares about you and how much time you spend with them loving just living. I also fell into the trap of “quality time” versus “quantity” time. Trust me guys; there is no such thing as quality without quantity. I won’t say that it took cancer to make me realize these truths, but it sure iced the deal for me. Almost a decade ago, when I started moving closer to God I also found myself moving closer to my wife and family. Thinking back over the years I probably did not move close enough or fast enough, so God in His infinite wisdom gave me a “little” nudge this past winter. I do think that sometimes He really does have a sense of humor, as my life has gone from the shallow end of the pool to the depths of the ocean, since “quantity” is no longer the issue as I am no with Annie every hour every day, but also loving every second. Thank God that He Blessed Annie with tons of Grace, which enabled her to forgive me and put up with me all of these years. I should have been living outside like Skittle ages ago, but as He promises us that He will restore those lost years, God has delivered to me a life of quality and quantity, for which I am most thankful.

Today was a special day and it marked the first time that I did not take Annie upstairs to IPOP. I dropped her and her able bodied assistant, Lily, at the front door and took off to deliver Kyle to the Annual Youth Group Picnic Swim Party in New Windsor. Kyle was a big hit with his buddies who did not think he would be able to attend. He told me later that he won the prize for the best “belly flops” of the day. Oh, to be young again…I guess. Lily did a great job keeping Annie company and helping out with the administrative details of IPOP, like assembling the 8 different drugs that need to be taken at various times at night and the next morning. . Annie’s time on the machine was down to an hour, since she has tolerated her oral Cyclosporine, (Thanks for your prayers in this matter as they worked!!! PTL)

As I was dropping Kyle at Wakefield Valley church whose Sunday service had ended about 20 minutes before, all of the die-hards who don’t rush home at the last Amen mobbed me to ask how Annie was doing, (and they also asked about me, too), and also to see how they can help. I was told that a special prayer time was held for Annie after the service, which was well attended. Wakefield Valley Bible Church and its members, who are the church, have been such a Blessing to our family and I don’t think I could ever last this ordeal without them and God’s help. After saying goodbye for now I ran over to check on our house. Of course there wasn’t a weed in site and the lawn was freshly cut. Like all lawns in this droughty neighborhood it was brown with little green, but still no weeds. I am truly humbled how these folks serve God and our family.

After checking out everything and feeding Skittles, who acted as if I was a stranger, I took off for IPOP to retrieve the girls. Before Annie got up this morning I made a fresh spaghetti sauce from scratch based with the beautiful Roma tomatoes that were grown in my sister Deanna’s garden. Cooking to me is a great form of relaxation, plus it seems that the more I cook the less I eat. I don’t know why this is so, but I will take it for what it does. I must admit that during the past several weeks I fell off the wagon and have puffed-up a bit from all of the carbs, so I started back to eating healthy, skipping the fresh Italian bread and virgin olive oil and substituting my faux spaghetti made from fresh zucchini, cut into strings and stir-fried al dente, (I actually think these tastes just as good and I know it’s much better for me, too. The mind can rationalize anything if we want it to.), Mama Mia!!!

It was a great treat that Sean and Russell joined us for dinner. We don’t get a lot of face time with Russ who is living in Boston for now, working for Continental Resources, a giant ($300 Million ) family owned computer company. Russ has fared very well during these tough times and has risen above the economic chaos like the star that he has always been. Never in our wildest imaginations did we think either of our oldest sons would be salespeople, but they are and both are doing exceptionally great.

Russ was down to attend a wedding of his friends, Joy and Brian, and Sean was in the wedding party, splendidly decked-out in white tie and tails. The wedding and reception was held at one of my favorite clubs to play golf, Woodholme Country Club in Pikesville. I always loved playing at Woodholme because it was a caddy club and the caddies tell you which club to use to hit each of your shots. This helps me a great deal since I know as much about golf as I do about nuclear fission and now that Annie has Tim’s genes I will know even less than her. Oh well, who has time to golf anyway.

Guys, did I make a big mistake last night. I let the cat out of the bag when Lily realized that daddy knows how to iron shirts. I always sent my shirts to the laundry pretending that I did not know which way to point the iron, when in fact I was taught how to iron shirts by a master ironer, my grandmother. My grandfather, Russ Kittle, would never walk out of the house without a shirt that couldn’t walk on its own, so “mam-maw” taught me how to iron shirts when I was 5. I guess this was so that when I got married my wife could do other stuff, like watch game shows with her father-in-law. Since I have been sending about 4 shirts each week at a buck a piece, to the local laundry I think the ladies figured out that my ironing would save us enough money each year to pay for cable TV so they can live in “The Weakest Link” heaven. Girls……NOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Monday will be a big day around the Gamber house as Aunt Zoe (nee: Donna) flies in (on an airplane) with kids Emily and Nathan. Zoe was a professional opera singer and although she is only about 5 feet tall, she can belt out a song like Maria Callas. I just love hearing her sing and the last time Annie and the kids were in Zoe’s hometown, Minneapolis, Zoe sang the National Anthem at a Twins Orioles game that everyone attended. She also toured the country as the Queen in The Magic Flute as well as played lead parts in many other Gilbert & Sullivan operas. Emily and Nathan are no slouches either as Emily at young age of 16 transitioned from being home schooled for most of her life to last year attending a local school to get a taste of the other side of teaching. She and promptly went to the top, leading her class of 400. What do you expect from a girl whose parents are this right side of Albert Einstein? Her dad Chuck, Annie’s brother, was a bridge master at 19, got banned from Las Vegas casinos for counting cards at 25 and was the National Scrabble Champion and only one tile away from being the World Champion several years ago. (Chuck memorized the Webster’s Unabridged Dictionary in order to complete at the world level. He knows his words) Nathan, an Eagle Scout by age 14, has taken after his dad so Uncle Gary no longer plays chess with him; in fact, I stopped doing that when he was 5 after getting aced in less than 6 moves when we were killing time at the beach. So we are in for quite a week and I just love these guys to death.

God is Good and Great!!! And, you are, too, so please keep praying as Annie will soon be entering phase two of her transplant 100 day vigil. This is the period where Graft Versus Host will be an issue that can be a Blessing or a curse. We are praying for the Blessing.

Saturday, August 17, 2002, 9:00 PM Day 15
I arrived home safe and sound with my valuable cargo in tact. While in Pittsburgh Kyle was most excited by his first cruise in a Porsche as Uncle Jeff took him for a drive in his classic 1969 Porsche 912. He said it was still exciting even when they had to push it home the last few blocks due to a broken accelerator. This makes it a classic classic car story for Kyle’s journal.

My past 24 hours included a 500 mile round tripper between Baltimore and Pittsburgh, to fetch Kyle and Lily. The trip in my classic Nissan Pathfinder went quickly as I listened to David Balducci’s “Last Man Standing” on CD. It is a tense and exciting novel that made the trip a breeze. We arrived home a few minutes after Annie’s Wakefield war buddies, Bev and Jackie, left and Annie was stretched out on the couch talking with Pat Meisol, our favorite feature writer and reporter with the Baltimore Sun. Pat has written many great articles over the years, one of which concerned the plight of a young mom who lost a great battle with the beast several years ago. “Marcie’s Story” was a warm and very heartening story that garnered a great deal of public interest. I believe that a TV movie was also based on Pat’s story. Thank God that our life is just too boring to write about, which is fine by us, as boring lives are always good and long.

Annie had another good round of news from IPOP today as her counts are still holding strong and we expect upward mobility very shortly. Also, it was great news that she was able to take her Cyclosporine orally and the previous 4 hour daily drip is now history. So her 6 hour IPOP day will be reduced to a little over two hours, which means that twenty-two hours will be spent at our home away from home downtown until her counts break the magic barrier of 1000. The big issue with oral Cyclosporine is that Annie has to take 3 pills twice a day which are as big as Milk Bone Dog Biscuits, and I hear taste much worse. (Did you used to eat dog biscuits when you were a kid?) But, Annie, being the Carroll that she is, slurped them down like Rocky Mountain oysters and got home 4 hours earlier today. As I am sitting here writing this journal entry Annie and the kids are watching some inane show on the Disney Channel and if she doesn’t get cured soon so we can go home to New Windsor, you will probably read a Pat Meisol article about a 52 year old bald man who went berserk and threw the TV out of the window of his 13th floor apartment landing on Ernie’s Peanut House, a Baltimore institution since 1945. That won’t be a boring story, and it may just get Pat her first Pulitzer for best human interest story.

Annie has been a little queasy lately in the afternoon these past few days and her Ativan miracle drug does not seem to be as effective as before. She has lost it a couple of times, but when she complained to the medical team they just smiled and reminded her she just had a BMT. The doctor told her he won’t be interested in hearing her complaints until the nausea becomes an hourly past time for her. We pray that this won’t be the case and are confident that this phase will soon pass. Today she had to get up early and it through her out of whack, so tomorrow we will get back to our regular sleep schedule and all should be back to normal.

Russell is coming to visit with us tomorrow afternoon, before he leaves to go back to Boston. We are all excited as we really miss him being so far away. Yesterday when he was at Hopkins visiting he had a bit of Déjà vu, as he spent a week there when he was in high school after it was discovered that he had a gall bladder and spleen condition that was wrecking havoc on his red blood cells. He had his gall bladder removed and for the most part his system has behaved ever since.

Tomorrow we are looking for a boring day at IPOP and a great family afternoon after lunch. Have a great Sunday and God Bless You. Please keep up the prayers!!!

Friday, August 16, 2002, 10:50PM, Day 14
Well, it looks like your faithful correspondent has skipped town (i.e., gone to Pittsburgh to pick up the kids) so you are all stuck with me.

This will be a somewhat short update (and probably less lively than you're used to) because it's almost my bed time.

I did indeed see Ginny, Sean and Russell today. With all of those wonderful visits, the day went really quickly even though I had to receive two pints of blood and some platelets. The all important white blood cell count was 178 which I consider not too far off 200. Apparently, these counts will go up and down until they've "set up housekeeping" in my bone marrow and are really ready to dig in and start some serious white cell production. Last week Dr. Flinn told me that I could get excited when my counts reach 100 for several days in a row. With 90, 200 & 178, I'm getting excited. I'm also told that once these counts take off, they really just soar and I'll hit 1,000 very quickly which gets me out of the immediate danger range. I will still need to be careful with hygiene, etc. as normal white blood cell count is over 4,000.

Gary should be getting to Pittsburgh late this evening and bringing the kids back tomorrow. One of my "Chica" friends, Andrea, is spending the night with my and we have already successfully navigated through the use of the medicine ball and all that that entails. (she did a great job) Andrea will get me to the hospital where two other dear friends, Jackie and Bev, will come all the way from Carroll Co. to take care of me only to be relieved by another friend, Pat. It's absolutely wonderful to be so blessed by so many great friends. I have to admit though, the highlight of tomorrow will be seeing the children. I don't know who's missed each other more. (Probably me)

Many thanks and much love to all of you who have called and written to express you care and concern and most importantly, for your prayer support. God continues to be faithful through this process and with Him for me, who can be against me?

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO OUR DEAR FRIEND NANCY HOCK. Nancy and her husband Vince are heading off to Europe to celebrate.

It's 2 weeks today!! Praise God that all is going well, except I am really running late today. Sean and Russ are visiting today and Ginny Becker a great friend of Annie's from our former church, Grace Fellowship, will be coming in the afternoon to see Annie.
Thanks for all of your love and prayers. I will update later today.

Thursday Evening, August 15, 2002 Day 13.5
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO OUR NUMBER 1 SON, SEAN who turned 26 today!!!

After IPOP we rushed home and pulled out the address book and then realized that neither of us had the energy or ability to call everyone on our list. So as not to disappoint anyone at not being called we decided to only call our parents with the GREAT NEWS, and let the web site do the rest.

Annie’s blood counts came back today, and miracles of miracles, her white blood cell count was over 200!!! We were shooting for a par 100 and hit a double eagle. Even better, her absolute neutrophils which are the "baby" white cells (polymorphonuclear leukocytes) were 160!!! This means that God is faithfully answering yours and our prayers with a YES!! Tim has birdied the first 9 holes heading for the clubhouse shooting for an eagle. He’s definitely leaving Tiger in the woods behind, as after only 13 days post transplant Annie is making great strides to being cured of the beast!! The transplant is working and the medical folks are optimistic that engraftment is occurring and we are confident that God is going to deliver us from this cancer wilderness.

Sarah Schabes came to visit today. Sarah and Annie worked together at the same law firm after Annie graduated from law school in 1987. Sarah is now an estate and trust specialist with a premier law firm in downtown Baltimore, Gordon Feinblatt, et al. She has been faithfully praying for Annie and keeping in touch since our journey began and Annie had a great time and I am sure they were talking family and law war stories. She also brought Annie a beautiful plant that we can’t keep for now so I am giving it to our neighbors to take care of until Annie comes home. Plants and flowers are like pets and transplant patients; that is, they may carry virile strains of bacteria and fungi that can cause havoc to new immune systems. It happens all of the time and the hospital is very understanding so when Annie gets home she will have another beautiful flower to nurture. Sarah is as sweet as her plant is beautiful and we have been so Blessed by her friendship and legal talent over the years, but she had to leave before the great news came down from the lab.

For an encore my baby sister Deanna, who is now 35, came for lunch and a good time was had by all. Deanna is always the life of the party but today it was Annie who was the life of the party when she got the great news. High fives were flying everywhere and Deanna was a wonderful person to have around during such an emotional high. I had to leave for a while to go shopping and pick up a prescription so I don’t know exactly what went on but I am sure it was fun. Our nurse today was Laurie and she is quite the character, too, so I can only imagine what went on with the girls. As we were leaving to go home we stopped to say Hi to Mark, one of our new BMT friends. Mark is doing it in style with catered lunch from the Marbury Wing kitchen, which is the Ritz Carlton area at Hopkins. The rooms look like hotel suites and all of the medical paraphernalia is hidden behind rich looking wood paneling. It looked as if he were having Welsh Rarebit and English scones with his chemo and folks I will tell you that’s an impressive combination topped off with a Cytoxan cocktail. It should be an interesting month as we meet and greet new folks on IPOP “A” Pavilion.

God Bless You all and please keep up the prayers as they are really working. All kidding aside there are still many hurdles that Annie will have to overcome, but we approach them one day at a time and with great comfort knowing that God is taking care of business and listening to yours and our prayers.



Thursday, August 15, 2002 Day 13
Annie’s Verse for the Day:
Enter into His gates with Thanksgiving,
And into His courts with Praise.
Be thankful to Him and Bless His name
For the Lord is Good;
His mercy is everlasting,
And His truth endures to all generations. Amen
Psalm 100: 4-5

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO OUR SON SEAN (THE NEWLYWED)!!
Good Morning!! Yesterday was Wednesday, August 14th; Day 12, if you can believe it and we are both ready to go home to New Windsor. We met our new attending doctor, Mark Levis, who is a Professor of Oncology as is Dr. Jones. Twice each year the teaching professors do a stint with patients for 4-6 weeks. This is Mark’s time. We had heard that he was a great doctor and a very thorough one, too. After meeting him I can only concur with the rumor. He took a great deal of his time to answer Annie’s and my questions and he explained how Blessed we were by not being treated heavily before, thanks to God and our great doctor back home, Dr. Kruter. He explained that one of the most dangerous effects that a transplant patient can experience is the venous occlusive disease (VOD) that attacks the liver. Although it has been know to happen, this phenomenon rarely occurs in persons who have not been heavily treated with previous chemotherapy. When VOD attacks the transplant patient it is a wicked pestilence that literally melts the liver and is almost always fatal in later stages. We missed him on his first day as were already gone post treatment by the time he got around to us. He seemed to be following up on rumors about a patient who may have been at the IPOP on false pretenses since she did not appear to be ill, but rather on a short vacation to the coast of France where all of the fashionable ladies are cropping their hair short to the scalp. So his curiosity got the best of him and he showed-up almost as soon as we settled into our regular cubbyhole #12. I think he was most impressed with how Annie is doing and we told him about all of you and your daily prayers for us and how God is working in our lives, protecting us constantly from all of the nastiness that can happen in these things. I don’t know how we can ever thank all of you for your kindness and faithfulness.

Dr. Kruter called Annie today to she how she was doing. He is getting detailed reports from the medical folks at Hopkins in preparation to getting his star patient home. Dr. Kruter is not an emailing doctor and prefers the "old" way of patient relationships, which is to talk to them. In his opinion this is the only way he can get a true sense of how a patient is really doing. We are all for it and he also told Annie that he thinks she will be kicked out of the program a lot sooner than expected since things are going so well. When we were wrestling with the whole idea of doing a BMT, Dr. Kruter, who was not overly keen on a transplant initially for Annie but then became the swing vote; that is, I asked the question after all of the data and other doctor opinions had been reviewed; “If Annie was your wife what would you do, knowing her as you do? He replied, “I would go for the BMT”. This clinched it for us as we both know how much Dr. Kruter loves his wife, who helped him start his practice and worked daily with him for the past 8 years until recently retiring to take care of the family. I don’t know if medical schools can teach caring and compassion but they should try. I must say, at least in the world of cancer we have met many medical professionals that are caring and compassionate, so perhaps it’s the disease that attracts these types of folks, but I can assure you that it makes a big difference in a patient’s own attitude and I am sure it also affects their time for recovery. God Bless these dedicated people.

Yesterday was a big milestone as I left Annie in the able hands of her youngest sister Jennifer and went to Washington on business. It was great timing as Jennifer and Annie have been dying to see each other since we arrived at Hopkins, but because Jen is a new mom, and Annie can’t be exposed to the children until after her immune system has recovered, they have been unable to hug. Yesterday, Jen made special feeding provisions and Jen’s husband and father Erik graciously took care of Aidan and Isaac while she made the 90 minute trek to Baltimore. I wasn’t there but I know they had a marvelous time. When I first met Jen she was 10 and I believe that she is knocking on 32 or has already entered. Time flies and she has been such a joy in our lives. Also, when she isn’t at home raising the children with Erik she helps develop housing for the homeless and disadvantaged folks in Arlington, Virginia. This is the type of person she is. Erik is a most interesting guy. Erik is a graduate of Vassar College (which was a ritzy girls’ school when I was in college), and has a Masters in special education. After teaching several years he decided that he wanted to stay home with the kids and he has done a marvelous job. Aidan is the most knowledgeable person in the world under the age of 5 about tools and home remodeling and knows every nook and cranny of Home Depot, his favorite place to visit.

Chica Jane came to IPOP at 2 PM so Jen could leave for home and after Annie finished up her treatment Jane brought her home to wait for me. What great friends we have.
God Bless You all.



Tuesday, August 13, 2002 Day 11
Annie’s Verse of the Day
It is better to trust in the Lord
Than to put confidence in man.
Psalm 118: 8
We look around at those who do not have a relationship with God and it seems as if their spirits are not as high as our own and they do not seem to be faring as well. This may be a false observation on our part, but even some of the nurses have agreed.

It’s 3 PM and we are home. Yeah!!! TODAY WAS REALLY BORING. Yeah!! Yeah!! Yvette, our Fellow is getting bored with Annie, too. I don’t think she is learning anything new and that’s great by us. I say let her learn on the others. All kidding aside, she is really pleased with how things are going and is still thoroughly checking Annie everyday. I saw Dr. Jones in the elevator and he had his civvies on since he is not on duty now. He gave me the thumbs up and said Annie’s white blood cells will get down to business next week. I told him that we don’t worry a bit as it’s in His hands not ours.

Our new attending physician, Marc Levitz, walked by but didn’t stop, so I assume we’ll see him tomorrow. It looks as if he is already bored with Annie, but once he meets her I am sure he’ll make it a point to stop by. The highlight of the day was meeting Mark and Liz, who are moving in on Wednesday to the Park Charles as “True IPOP” folks. Interestingly enough, Mark had leukemia when he was nine and thirty years later he has it again. Same kind, except he has the adult variety this time. His prognosis is great and we are looking forward to visiting with them. They also have 2 children, Tim who is 10 and Ally who is 7. Liz is tag teaming with Mark’s mom as caregiver since Ally is so young; Liz needs to be more available for her. They are from the District area so travel is an issue for them.

We spoke to Kyle and Lily last night who are with Aunt Amy and Uncle Paul in Columbus, Ohio. They are having a ball but at this point after being away for so long, Lily especially wants to come home and misses us very much. I am going to try to pick them up in Pittsburgh on Saturday and get them home. I need to arrange coverage for Annie during this time as fetching them is as much for Annie and me as it is for the kids.

Annie’s sister Jen is coming to visit tomorrow. She lives in Arlington. Ironically, I have a meeting tomorrow in Arlington so we will wave to each other on the highway in passing.
Our nurse John told us that Dr. Platelets will be visiting Annie in the morning so we should see the little yellow bag early.

Everything is going great so thanks so much for all of your prayers and please do not get bored on your end as we need all of the prayer that we can get. God is Great and so are you guys. Bless you all.

Monday Evening, August 12, 2002 Day 10.5!!!
Today was the shortest day ever since the preconditioning phase. It was also the most boring day so far too, which makes it the best day ever. Annie’s white counts are still at the bottom of the ocean and as Fellow Yvette says, “We don’t get excited when they go down only when they go up, as at this time we only expect them to be down”.

Dr. Jones stopped by for his final official visit as our attending physician. He explained all of the different antibiotics and told us that he will discontinue the Gatifloxian on Saturday. Tomorrow we meet his replacement, Dr. Levitz, who is a professor of Oncology at Hopkins. Also, on Saturday if all continues to go well Annie will switch to oral Cyclosporine which will cut our IPOP day to less than 3 hours. Yeah!!!

Annie and I walked 25 laps today around the core of IPOP, which equals 1 mile. It really helps to keep in shape as the antibiotics zap your energy and exercise helps build up the body. It’s really interesting that Annie’s heart runs about 30aster than normal during the infusions, so in a typical day she will burn 4-5000 calories. This means she can eat just about anything she wants and they insist on extra rich ice creams…not Giant brand or Byers, but Ben & Jerry’s, Creamery, Hagan Das, Godiva, etc.. Unfortunately for me, Annie does not feel like eating the “sinful” foods and prefers to get her calories from my super rich mashed potatoes, which I make with double butter, cracker barrel cheese, and half-half cream. So that this $5 per pint stuff doesn’t go to waste I end up eating her ice cream, which is going to my waist, so next week I will sign up for the Fat Boy program on the 3rd floor of the main hospital.

Today was so boring that both Annie and I fell asleep around 2 PM and woke-up when the buzzer went off. Our latest nurse, Laurie, who is a real hoot, flushed Annie's lines and we rushed home to watch our 4 PM game shows. Laurie is another reason why Hopkins is number 1 as she is not only a real professional but has a great personality to boot. My highlight of the day was eating Annie’s lunch as she stuck with one of my famous cranberry-yogurt smoothies since we had a late breakfast anyway. That’s how our day went.

Your prayers are really working as God is keeping everything in check and under His control and we are letting Him do just that. I asked Annie yesterday if she thought it was strange that I am not a basket case, or does she question my caring for her since I don’t have any concerns whatsoever? She tells me she feels the same way as we both have totally unburdened ourselves and given it up to the Lord. So…if you are worried about anything, just give it to Him and go about your business as He goes about His. God Bless and Have A Great Boring Day!!

GIVE THANKS FOR HOW GOD HAS TAKEN CONTROL OF OUR LIVES!!!!!
GIVE THANKS FOR OUR HERO, TIM!!!!!
GIVE THANKS FOR OUR FAMILY AND FOR YOURSELVES because without you talking to God He may not have such an open ear.
Pray that Annie will engraft soon.
Pray that we grow closer to God.
Pray that our family is protected during our time apart.
Pray that Annie experiences little Graft versus Host, but does get a Graft versus Lymphoma
Pray that Annie experiences limited side effects from all of the treatment
Pray that Annie will be protected from fever and infection
Pray that we will have the resources to see this thing through without worry
Pray that Bamboo Solutions will survive and prosper
Pray that Annie will be CURED and we can live for Him.


Monday Morning, August 12, 2002 Day 10!!
Annie’s Verse for the Day
The fear of the Lord is the beginning
Of wisdom
And the knowledge of the Holy One
Is understanding
Pr: 10:10
We have been Blessed by a very wise and understanding doctor who takes the time to explain everything to us in a way in which we can understand, which in my opinion is a rarity for a doctor, especially one who is so busy like Dr. Jones. No matter how trivial the question may seem, he is always ready to explain away any fears or questions that we may have. Yesterday we learned about Host versus Lymphoma, which occurs in 10f all BMT patients. Typically when one undergoes a BMT the resulting effect is that the new marrow is really the donor’s marrow, which is why we joke about Annie getting Tim’s golf game. We really won’t know if she does get Tim’s marrow for sure until we have the Day 60 bone marrow biopsy, but it’s a 90hance that the dominant part of Annie’s marrow will be Tim related. The HVT phenomenon is when for some reason, unbeknownst to man, Annie begins to remanufacture her own marrow and at the biopsy she becomes the dominant system. This worried us but Dr. Jones pointed out that the issue is not the marrow but the objective is to rid Annie’s body of the Lymphoma cells, so he doesn’t care how it happens as long as it happens. This sounds like common sense to us, which is why we like Dr. Jones so much.

Yvette, our graduate Fellow, who trained at Harvard in general medicine before choosing Oncology as her field of concentration, was quite taken back by how great Annie looked and kept commenting on this fact all morning. I am somewhat prejudiced and always think she looks great, but it is good to hear this from others, especially from our doctors. Yvette also expanded quite nicely on the HVT issue and it showed that even after only two months into the program she has a great depth of knowledge. I am so impressed by the entire Hopkins team that I really understand how they can voted Best in the World by US News every year, as they are the best in our book. Yvette was also surprised and I think saddened by the fact that Monday is Dr. Jones last day on the IPOP floor for several months. I think she realizes how much she learns for someone of such great experience, but like he told us, he will still be stooping in to check up on his star patients. Besides, I rest assured that regardless of who takes over they will be great just like the rest of the team.

Happily, Carol was again our nurse and took excellent care of Annie. Annie knew from the minute she met Carol that she would like her, as did I. Carol has been practicing over 10 years and came to Hopkins as a travel nurse form University of Chicago. She fell in love with the Hopkins folks and decided to make here her home. We’re certainly glad as she is really knowledgeable and actually teaches the BMT education class for new and prospective patients.

Chica “Boog” showed up today to help me out with a break and to visit with Annie for a few hours while her affable hubby Tom stayed home with the kids. Tom was the former Chief of Radiology at Union Memorial for 17 years and after tiring of the daily politics he moved to private practice. He reads my chest x-rays and explains things in a language that I can understand. He and Libby just moved into their new home, which is over 100 years old, and are busily remodeling this most charming house. They have been gracious to offer us the third floor as we transition back home to New Windsor in October, which tells you the type of folks they are. God has really put some wonderful people in our lives and we are so thankful.

We had a pleasant evening with Sean and his new bride Jeana, who joined us for a light Sunday night dinner. It’s always great to see these guys and we are so very proud of them. Jeana is a Hopkins graduate of their English masters program and she did a stint at Cambridge in Shakespearean Literature last year. Sean, a recent Cornell graduate is a few courses shy of getting his MBA, also from Hopkins, which he expects to complete by next December. We had even better news in that our other son, Russell, will be visiting us form Boston next week. This is very exciting as we really miss having him around, but youth gives one the ability to travel and see the world.

It’s about time to roust my loved one and get ready for our day at the IPOP. Come next Saturday and God willing we will be down to 2 hours everyday instead of 5 or 6. Yeah!!!
God Bless you All and kept prying for Annie’s healing and continual withstanding of the side effects.

Sunday Morning, August 11, 2002 Day 9
Annie’s Verse for the Day Everyday I will Bless You,
And I will praise Your name forever and ever.
Great is the Lord , and greatly to be praised;
And His greatness is unsearchable.
Psalm 145:2

God Morning!!! Good Morning to All. WELL, I DID REMEMBER MY INSTRUCTIONS AND THE “BOMB” DID NOT BLOW-UP!!! Praise God!

We miss you, especially on Sunday as when we are home we are able to share so much fellowship, being with you and our Lord at Wakefield Valley Bible Church. We are very much looking forward to getting our weekly tapes of the service so we can still share some moments with you and God together. Pastor Horner called this morning and I think he was pleasantly surprised when Annie took the phone to give a personal update. Pastor Horner is representative of the entire Body at Wakefield as everyone who is part of this wonderful church has been praying for us and taking care of all of our needs. Just the other day I ran out to our home to see if everything was OK. I needn’t have bothered and wasted the gas money as things were not the same, only better. Our lawn was beautifully cut and manicured by our neighbor Ruth, a fellow Wakefield member…God Bless You, Ruth. Our next door neighbor, Ann Marie is taking care of Skittles for Kyle and Lily and I am sure she is remaining fat and happy, even though we are away. Annie’s and my buddy, “Zoe” Donna is coming weekly to keep the dust down and tend to Annie’s plants that have managed to survive this ordeal. She is also reorganizing things around the house to make it a bit tidier than I left it. I could go on and on, but we are running “late” as usual. It is acts such as this that makes me realize how much I need to learn about serving others and I am learning through this experience by serving Annie during her time of need. It is so comforting to know that as He has promised we can give up all of our burdens and worries to Him and He will take care of everything. I never really understood this promise, but today I am living it.

We are getting ready for our day at the IPOP and we are praying that it will be as short as it was yesterday. Our new nurse, Carol, did a super job and got us in and out in less than 6 hours. Today, we also are no longer taking Vancomycin, which saves time and is one less drug to deal with.
See you later and God Bless you all!!!

Saturday Evening, August 10, 2002 Day 8

We got up earlier today than usual, but were still rushing to get to the center before 10:30 AM. I don’t know why we rush to get there, since we have no other places that we can go, but Annie feels that the day feels better if we get home earlier. I look at it as “24 hours is 24 hours”, so whatever as she’s the boss.

Today was less boring but really interesting as we had a chance to learn more about what is happening to Annie and what may occur in the near future. Dr. Jones was on duty today and as he was checking on Annie she struck up a great conversation, by asking some really good questions. One of the drugs she is taking daily that she will continue to until at least Day 180 is Cyclosporine. Cyclosporine is given to suppress the immune system and lessen the risk and/or gravity of Graft vs. Host Disease http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/ency/article/001309.htm Annie asked the logical question…so, what does it do to Tim’s immune system? Dr. Jones answered that the drug also suppresses Tim’s system, but the suppression factor is very low for both systems, which makes this the transplant “miracle” drug that it is. Cyclosporine doesn’t kill the T-cells, which is not good, but actually turns them “off” until Annie’s system has engrafted and recovered sufficiently to deal with her new T-cells. T-cells are called receptor cells and have “on” and “off” switches to fight invading cells. So, by temporarily turning off the T-cells it is less likely that Annie will attack Tim and that Tim will attack Annie; so it is a truce so to speak. (And there are folks who question that we were created by a Creator.)

Annie’s follow-up question was whether she had a better chance at not getting acute GVHD being young. Dr. Jones went on to explain that before they had drugs like Cyclosporine transplants weren’t done for people over their 40’s and today they transplant at 70. (We knew this after meeting Mr. Raphael, who by the way is back to IPOP after a heart incident last week. He’s my idol for human endurance.). The research seems to show that the Thymus Gland, (where the T-cells become T-cells) shrinks with age as it trains the immune system which controls attacks on the body, so once it’s trained it loses its job, and the drug helps maintain the system so that in its new form it doesn’t need a great deal of new training.

All in all it was a great day which was topped off by a visit from my mom and dad. They stuck with Annie while I did some shopping for a special Saturday night dinner…shrimp salad on French toast. We may be bored but we sure do eat well!!

Tonight is a big test for me and Annie is praying hard that I pass it with flying colors, as I have to flush her Hickman for the first time. This is necessitated by the fact that she needs to take her Cefepime antibiotic at 10 PM tonight. This antibiotic must be given intravenously over 30 minutes, and 10 years ago we would have had to go back to the hospital, but a few years ago some genius invented a medicine “bomb”. (Which is shaped like an onion bulb that I screw into Annie’s line?) As she lies there the antibiotic is released into her body in similar fashion to the typical IV, which is very cool when you think about it. We must flush the line before and after the bomb is released with several different solutions in a proper sequence, so Annie is really praying that I have remembered the sequence. (I am getting old and no longer the brightest crayon in the box, as Lily likes to say). Being the typical lawyer, Annie pointed out that this would be an opportune time to create the “perfect” crime. Very interesting, but I think I will stick with her just a while longer…but no more than 50 years on this earth!!!

Tune in tomorrow for the next chapter of Dr. Strange Gamber or How I Learned to Give the Bomb” God Bless You All!!!

Saturday Morning, August 10, 2002 Day 8
Annie’s Verse of the Day
It is good that I have been afflicted,
That I may learn Your statutes.
The law of Your mouth is better to me
Than thousands of coins of gold and silver.
Psalm 119:71-72

Hey its Saturday morning cartoon time and guess where we will be watching them from. Yep…Johns Hopkins Theatre in the Square. Are we complaining? Nope. Why? Because God is showing us His Glory is revealing how we can be closer to Him. Sure, we would have liked a little different roadmap but when we look at others in our situation we realize just how Blessed we are. There is so much suffering and grief around us, but even more there is fear, yet we do not fear death. Because we know God is in control and there is nothing we can do to change His outcome for us so why worry and fear something that may never happen.

This morning Annie and I received another beautiful encouraging note from a fellow caregiver and Believer, John. John lost his wife Megan to a very rare lymphoma, just six weeks after their daughter Diana, was born. John is raising his daughter, but we know that he is not doing this alone, as Megan is with him everyday through John and Diana’s relationship with God. Their story is so very inspiring that I recommend it to anyone who wants to know what true faith is all about. You can send a note to Diana at allthingspossible@allthingspossible.org as her first birthday is on Monday! Megan’s story at http://www.news-observer.com/courageousbattle/

I have never felt as close to Annie or anyone else for that fact as I do now and I pray this closeness will never part. I don’t know if I could ever have achieved these feelings without having to face life like we face today, so I am sure God’s plan for me had to include this chapter.

Praise the Lord for answered prayer as the fever went as quickly as it came and there has been no news from the many cultures the medical staff took and “no culture news is good news’!!! Thanks for the prayers. Our goal was to go 24 hours without any signs of fever without Tylenol suppression. So around 7 PM our in-patient Fellow, Dr. Wang, showed his face and smilingly suggested that Annie may have been crunching some ice before they took her temperature. We cried in unison, ‘Not Us”, so he signed-off and we immediately headed home for another boring night and some good rest. It was so boring that it was one of our best nights.

Friday Morning, August 09, 2002 Day 7
Annie’s verse this morning
The Lord is a sun and shield;
The Lord will give grace and glory;
No good thing does He withhold from those
who walk uprightly.
How blessed is the one who trusts in Him."
Psalm 84:11-12
One week old today!!! Just so that you do not worry things go back to boring last night as Annie’s fever broke around 6:30 PM and she was stable throughout the night. The best news is that her temperature is normal this morning, so we are most thankful for His answer to yours and our prayers last night. Annie was given both red blood cells and platelets so her numbers are real good now, but she will continue to get blood supplements until a month or so after engraftment as it takes the body longer to manufacture red blood cells than the whites.
The white blood cells have a rather short life cycle, living from a few days to a few weeks. It’s amazing but a drop of blood can contain anywhere from 7 000 to 25 000 white blood cells at a time. If an invading infection fights back and persists, that number will significantly increase. In Annie’s case she only has 50 total white bloods cells per milliliter of blood in her body today, essentially she is at “0”. Over time, the red blood cells get worn out and eventually die. The average life cycle of a red blood cell is 120 days. A normal person’s bones are continually producing new blood cells, replenishing their supply; however, in Annie’s case she is not making any red blood cells now so she needs regular transfusions until Tim’s marrow kicks in. (GO TIM GO!!!) To learn more go to http://www.mc.vanderbilt.edu/histo/blood/index.html. (By the way had I known more about the blood before our first crisis I am confident that Annie’s misdiagnosis in December would not have happened, as it is almost guaranteed that a person having a hemoglobin level of 5.1 as Annie did has a major blood disease like acute anemia or cancer.).
Today we experienced our first look at hospital rounds. This is something that I used to see on Ben Casey, but we actually experienced this morning as numerous doctors, nurses, dieticians, fellows, and pharmacists converged in our room to discuss Annie’s situation. All I heard was “discharge today” if there is no more fever by 6 PM. Theses words are like music to our ears!! So…say a few quickie prayers for no fever so we can go home if it is His will. God Bless You All and let’s have a boring day.
Thursday, 8/08/2002 Day 6
Annie’s Verse for the Day
Wait on the Lord;
Be of good courage,
And He shall strengthen your heart;
Wait, I say, on the Lord
Psalm 27:14

Lord we are waiting on you and know in our hearts that in Your time Your will will be done. For all of what we have already faced, and what we may face tomorrow, our anxiety is nowhere to be found, as we have given all our worries to Him. It’s amazing how calm Annie has been throughout this ordeal, which I can only attribute to her faith. She keeps me going strong and no matter how yucky she feels she always has a word or two of encouragement for me. What a wonderful gift from God she is to me as she helped me be in the land of the living and I don’t mean living on the shores of the Chesapeake Bay for you old timers out there, either.

Even though we really don’t know what the day will bring our faith tells us that it is in His hands and He will take care of us and our family. When we look at some of the other folks here and see the fear in their faces or learn and how much more difficult a time they have than we do, we can’t help but to Praise God for showing us such mercy. So, please thank Him on our behalf, too.

Well…today was not a boring day and if you recall, boring is good. Now, don’t get me wrong it hasn’t actually been a horrible day, as we expected to occasionally be overnight “guests” in the hospital, but I guess when it happens it’s still a surprise. So here we are in Room 17 of “B” pavilion, which will be our new home for a day or two. I have an internet connection and Annie has her Game Show channels. (My latest petition to God is to heal us now and send us home, as my loving wife, who never watches TV at home, is fast becoming a game show junkie.)

Annie came down with what is known with affection on the BMT unit as “Shake and Bake”. She’s cold, then hot, then cold….. until it’s over. The reason to worry about fevers is that they can mask infections and because Annie doesn’t have an immune system she cannot fight off bad bacteria and her chemo killed all of the good bacteria in her system, so she is now at considerable risk. The risk is that she is susceptible to severe bouts of pneumonia that can be fatal. We’re confident that God will continue to surround her with His loving arms of protection, but please let Him hear from you that not only are we thankful for His protection and want Him to continue to watch over us we also want Him to heal Annie for good!

We are very Blessed by being so close to Johns Hopkins and even more Blessed that we are doing Annie’s transplant as an out patient, since this is almost unheard of in the world of bone marrow transplants. However, Johns Hopkins, who developed this novel concept 10 years ago, under the direction of our present Doctor Jones, feels that this is a better alternative for people who have the flexibility and diligence to follow all of the program instructions. We feel even more confident that we made the right choice since Dr. Jones helped design and launch the “True IPOP” plan. But, now that we are here we can’t wait to go back to our second home away from home; however, it probably won’t be until Saturday. Please take some time to pray extra hard that her temperature will remain stable for the next 24 hours so we can go home late Friday instead.

Our night nurse is great, which seems to be the norm in the BMT unit at Johns Hopkins. Insuk is from Korea and 23 years ago she married and American GI and came to America. She is of strong faith and we shared some good stories with each other. Although she appears to be about 25 she has 2 children, one of whom is 20 and attending Vanderbilt University. Her other girl is only 8 years old and she is currently a student in Howard County where Insuk lives. Annie had to have another blood transfusion tonight as her Hematocrit is approaching the magic “25”. Its JHMI policy to use this number in an arbitrary fashion as Annie isn’t fatigued, but it doesn’t cut any mustard that she has operated fine this past year in the when she was always in the low 20’s. He platelets are back down to 20,000 so we expect around 5 AM to see a new bag hanging overhead. Usually they wait until she would hit 10000, but since she has a fever they automatically raise the bar.

We just spoke to Kyle and Lily who are in Pittsburgh with Grammy and they are getting ready to leave for Columbus, Ohio in the morning with Annie’s sister, Amy. They will be home next Friday and already we miss them as if they have been away for a year.

Guys, please keep up your prayers as you are being heard.
God Bless You In His Holy Name, Gary



Wednesday, 8/07/02 Day 5 Our chant today: GO TIM GO!!!!
Annie’s Verse for the Day
For by Me your days will be
Multiplied,
And years of life will be added to you.
Pr 10:11

Mom came to visit stayed with Annie most of the day. It was great seeing her and I know she and Annie had a great time. My partner Joan “Speedy” Race came down to have lunch with me and to talk a bit of business. She is homing in on a significant license deal for Bamboo, which if, (no, “when” is a better word), it closes it will take a lot of pressure off of many folks in my company. Speedy is just what her name implies as she is the fastest 5 foot tall blond hair blue eyed software salesperson on earth with a 50 foot heart. I don’t know what I would do without friends like her. Please pray for the NIH deal so Jack, (Speedy’s husband who just retired after 30 years on the railroad), and Annie don’t have to come out of retirement and get jobs.

Nothing happened today except for some routine itching and Annie got her first shot of platelets since her counts were so low. Platelets enable your body to clot in the event of injury; without them a person can easily bleed to death from a minor cut, so we were happy to see Dr. Platelet. Platelets are also yellow so the bag is really gross looking, sort of like a banana frappe…Yuck!!

Time for a commercial break: Folks, there are 1000’s of Annie’s in this world who need platelets and bone marrow. I know a lady who will probably not make it much longer because a match cannot be found and I know there are many others like her in this world today that can be given the gift of life from you. (Tim will tell you that it doesn’t hurt much at all and he was ready to go back to work an hour or two afterwards …these Carroll’s are something else). The world needs your platelets and bone marrow. You can donate blood at platelets at your local Red Cross and you can find out all about Bone Marrow donations at http://www.bonemarrowdonor.com/ or
Tel: 1-800-745-2452 (USA & CANADA) Contact them today!!!

We are praying hard that by next Friday we will be off of all IV medications and just popping pills. Then we will only need to go into IPOP for and hour or so each day, which will really make us fell that we are on a vacation…well, maybe not a great vacation, but perhaps like taking day trips to Coney Island. Boring is good but it’s a real pain to be plugged in like a toaster for 7 hours everyday, but who’s complaining since it’s getting Annie better by the hour. We are on infection watch for the next several weeks. Infections can have a way of making a transplant vacation into a nightmare so we pray hard that Annie will be protected form any significant flare-ups. Other than a few mouth sore spots and some itching and upset tummy Annie has been really Blessed, thanks to your prayers, so we pray that she will continue to do well. Yvette, our new Fellow from Pittsburgh, seems to think Annie is doing pretty good when t comes to side effects for now but like lawyers there is always a “but” to cover their …., (I am beginning to think that everybody not born here but who lives in Baltimore is from Pittsburgh of West Virginia as Dr. Smith, who pinch hits for Dr. Jones on his day off is from Pittsburgh, too. I know they must hear a bunch of “Alias Smith & Jones” jokes.) Yvette is a good caring doctor and I know she will make great strides in oncology as she seems very dedicated and sharp. The nurses think she is good, too.

Today should be the same as yesterday we pray and it will be really boring as I don’t think anyone is visiting us so Annie is stuck with me all day, so pray hard for her ability to cope. God Bless you all real good!!!

Tuesday, 8/06/2002 –Day 4
Annie’s Verse Today-
Serve me, O God and know my heart;
Try me, and know my anxieties;
And see if there is any wicked
Way in me, and lead me in the
Way everlasting
Psalm 13:9 23-24

Boring, boring, and boring…well not really, as Chica Jane visited and when Jane is around there is no such thing as Boring. Today, no Benadryl and it was a great decision as Annie was feeling really good and the only anxiety that we all share is when do we go home to “normal”? After Jane arrived I hung out a bit and left to run errands and have lunch. Jane brought lunch for her and Annie and judging from the size of her bag, the entire IPOP unit. As I left the girls were gaggling up a storm and had Sallie going strong, too. Sallie told us the sad news today, which is that she is rotating out of IPOP to the inpatient area. It’s a great loss for us, but the folks next door will definitely appreciate her wit as well as her professionalism. I also learned yesterday that Sallie is the President of the local Oncology Nurses Association, which judging from the attendance figures at their meetings is a pretty sizable bunch. She is hosting a meeting for 90 nurses at Captain Harvey’s in Reisterstown. I wonder what kind of cocktails they will be serving at the meeting.

Annie has little bouts of nausea that seem to come and go at a whim. Dr. Jones was expressing the fact that if they were pumping in 5 different drugs into me I would be a bit nauseous, too. (Correction please…bit is not the right word) He also said something interesting; nausea is mostly from the brain and not from the stomach, which I don’t doubt after observing how quickly it comes on to Annie as soon as we get in the car when she becomes aware that we are heading for IPOP. One morning I am going to try to fool her and head somewhere else, like the beach!!! That won’t be long from know, as I just know we will be out of here shortly. PLEASE pray hard for engraftment and recovery to come for Annie. I just want to take my pelican home where she belongs. Speaking of a pelican that’s the new name for my “purse”…Pelican Bag. A couple of months ago I borrowed a bag from Lily to carry the plethora of junk that I think I need to get through the day. I began calling it my purse, which drives Kyle and Lily up the wall, so Annie gave me this cute little pelican that hangs out of one of the 20 pockets and now it’s known as my pelican bag, so Kyle and Lily are not so embarrassed that dad carries a purse. For those of you who don’t know, I call Annie my Pelican, which is a bird that is referred to in various passages of the Bible’s Old Testament. There was also a cartoon that I recall form my childhood days about a pelican that would sit on top of a chimney and not fly away no matter what, even when there was a fire in the fireplace. The pelican does not waver or leave its roost in the wilderness to find a “better place”. Annie has always been steadfast for me and most women would have packed it in, taken the kids, and left town years ago if they had me as the husband I was then, but she is a committed person and never gave up or stopped praying for me that one day I would understand what life should be. So…..my pray is that God will heal my pelican so that she can soar out from this wilderness in which we are dwelling. I feel a bit like it must have felt to the Israelites who wandered the desert for 40 years and therefore I shouldn’t complain as we will be close to our home in about 40 more days.

Last night we watched our first movie, The Producers, which is currently a big hit on Broadway. It’s a Mel Brooks comedy that regardless of how down you feel, you will crack-up and you get the feeling of what it must be like to take 500 cc’s of Lasix. It was absolutely hilarious, (and no sex, violence or profanity…imagine a Hollywood that can make a funny movie that doesn’t offend or disgust…those were the days), and made for a great night as we noshed on burgers and I drank my medicinal glass of red wine. I really think a glass a day works as I seem to be living longer each day. I have also been told to make this ritual truly a medicinal exercise that I must drink the glass of wine before breakfast time, so I guess it means I will be double healthy in about an hour.

For those of you who have not figured this out yet on Wednesday we will be at IPOP. I no longer have to think about how I must dress, where I will be going, or how do I get to where I am going. It sure makes life easy and boring, but like we all say…”Boring is good”.

God Bless you guys. We love you and please pray that my Pelican will be healed and will soar out of this wilderness to live a long and healthy life with all of us.

Our Thanksgivings and Prayers:
Answered: Our BMT comrade has recovered and will return to the IPOP to go on to being the oldest living BMT survivor. PTL!!!
Thanks that Yvonne and the kids arrived safely in Pittsburgh!!!!
GIVE THANKS FOR HOW GOD HAS CALMED THE WATERS FOR US THOUGH THIS STORM AND HAS MADE IT POSSIBLE FOR ANNIE TO BE CURED!!!!!
GIVE THANKS FOR OUR HERO, TIM!!!!!
GIVE THANKS FOR OUR FAMILY AND FOR YOURSELVES because without you talking to God He may not have had such an open ear.
That Annie will engraft soon.
That we come to know God more and more.
That our family is protected during our time apart.
That Annie experiences little Graft versus Host, but does get a Graft versus Lymphoma
That Annie experiences limited side effects from all of the treatment
That Annie will be protected from fever and infection
That we will have the resources to see this thing through without worry
That Bamboo Solutions will survive and prosper
That Annie will be CURED and we can go on with life and do His Work.


Monday, 8/05/2002 –Day 3
Annie’s Verse Today-
Though I walk in the midst of trouble,
You will receive me;
You will stretch out your hand
Against the wrath of my enemies;
And your right hand will save me.
Psalm 138.7

Today was pretty uneventful and no events are good days, except when Annie engrafts and is discharged. These are great events, as will be each of her next 50 new birthdays. Annie’s mom, Kyle, and Lily are off on their journey today and we will surely miss them while they are away. After giving much consideration to canceling their trip we finally decided that it was better for them and us that they are away during this critical two week period so we can concentrate on “business”. The kids will be back and we will be here, but it is still very hard on us. Hecht, it’s hard on us being away from our 26 and 24 year old kids, Sean and Russell, too. Anne’s mom was a real Blessing to have around and she has a “lifetime pass” to our home and our hearts, too. Yvonne is an “unsung hero” and one of my most admired people in the world. She could have done anything with her life, as she is more than just smart, but took on the toughest challenge, which is raising Godly children and raise she has. Charlie and she have raised 8 kids, all of whom have become most successful in life, and all of whom are warm and wonderful. (Charlie also played a part in this but he stayed home on this trip, this time). I cannot think of a more important role in society than the role these folks have played in making this world a better place to live.

This will tell you something about the Carroll’s. Yvonne is 72 and recently recovered from a broken wrist gained from playing singles tennis and diving for a ball, just like Martina at the US Open. (I think it was her leg the time when she was 50), so you know she is one a tough lady, built from tough stock, too, which is where I think Annie gets her resilience and strength. I like to tell the story of when Yvonne’s dad came to Baltimore in the late 80’s, just before Lily was born. He was 93 and I took him to Washington to renew some of his patents. He was about 6’2” and being from Tucson, was wearing standard issue Tony Lama cowboy boots. When we arrived in DC I started to hail a taxi, when he says “Gary, we’ll walk”. Thank God I did not have my boots on as we must have walked 5 miles on that 100 degree day. By 5 PM I was ready for the grave, but not dad, so I gave thanks that our government shuts down at 4:30. This is the stock Annie comes from, so cancer has its work cut out for it if it thinks it’s going to lick us. God Bless Yvonne, the entire Carroll family, my mom and family, and you guys too, all who have been so supportive during this “little” crisis that we are facing. Speaking of great people my mom is coming to visit Annie on Wednesday and to give me a break so I can do some business and both Annie and I are looking forward to seeing her. She only raised 6 kids but is raising about 15 grandkids and great grandkids, too.I don’t know where we would be without her and dad as “grand mom” is the only substitute for mom in Lily’s life.

According to Annie’s MAR she isn’t getting any new drugs on Tuesday and we are hoping that her buddy, “Chica” Jane can visit with us. Jane, Annie, and Andrea have been friends, (“Chica’s”), since their college days at Loyola. Libby (“Boog”) is also one of the “Chica’s, but went to nursing school elsewhere and was later adopted. These friends have literally taken care of anything that we needed, even if we didn’t ask for it. For example, when I told Jane how hard it is for me to wash and change the same set of king sheets each day, her and her mom “Big” Jane had 3 new sets plus 20 towels at our apartment the next day!!! (Wait until you meet “Big” Jane, and Jane’s Sister Janet, talking about dynamos.) Jane, Janet, and Big Jane are big supporters of the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. They have organized a group of folks to run in a marathon in October in honor of Annie and some other good folks who have cancer. Jane’s dad died of Lymphoma and her brother Bob has recently been cured of Hodgkin’s disease, so they know this stuff better than any of us. Andrea lives in Federal Hill with her husband Jim and daughter Margeaux (I know I have spelled this wrong, but it’s late), and the Trexler’s have literally opened there home up to us, our family and friends whenever we need a place to stay. Andrea has run to the hospital, fetched for us, hugged us, and has really helped us get through the day. God knew we would need the Chica’s and has made it all possible. Boog and her hubby Tom have graciously offered their home to our family when we transition to out patient. New Windsor is more than an hour away so we can’t go home until 100 days are up. (Actually, New Windsor is an hour away from anywhere.) This is what Jesus meant when he said to “Love thy neighbor as thy self” These Chica’s are the best!!!

BIG NEWS OF THE WEEK. I finally got my Blackberry back from Earthlink. I have been without it for two weeks while it was being repaired do to some dumb thing I did but won’t bore you with the details. I now get my email instantaneously so send away and I can reply immediately. It’s better than calling me because I have to keep my cell phone off when at the hospital. I am a happy camper.

Annie spoke with our Hero, Tim tonight who is faring very well and tried to go back to work today but didn’t quite make it past the front door and stayed home and napped all day. He got a “Get out of work” ticket from the doctors for a week, but you wouldn’t expect a Carroll to take off more than a few hours from work just because they have 8 or 9 holes in their backside. If it were me I’d be off to Christmas 2003!!

Have a great day folks and God Bless you all!!! I learned something else yesterday and it is a lesson for all in such crises. No matter how much I love Annie, (and in case you don’t know for sure, trust me….I love her), God loves her more, so I need to give her up to Him, which I have done and He will take care of everything.



Sunday, 8/04/2002 – Day 2
Annie’s Verse Today –
Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord,
The fruit of the womb is a reward.
Like arrows in the hand of a warrior.
So are the children of one’s youth.
Psalm 127: 3-4

We have been Blessed with 4 wonderful children; Sean, Russell, Kyle, and Lily. This morning we packed up Kyle and Lily and sent them on their respective journeys. Kyle went to Gary Gait’s Lacrosse Day Camp at St. Paul’s School. Lily went with Grammy to our home in New Windsor and then Kyle is hooking up with them later and all are leaving on Tuesday for Annie’s home town, Pittsburgh, and then off to Columbus, Ohio with her sister Amy. The kids won’t be back until August 18th, so it was an emotional time for both of us as kids are what it is all about in our lives. Annie’s counts hit rock bottom today and when they begin to recover we will know for sure that God has answered our prayer for engraftment, the first big step in the cure process.

We arrived at the Weinberg around 10 AM and got checked out by Sallie. Around 11 AM Annie was given her shot of Benadryl to prevent another day of Redman’s Syndrome and she went out like a light and was in a twilight until we were ready to leave around 5 PM. Tomorrow we are going to speak to Dr. Jones about cutting back the Benadryl dosage so that Annie is not in such a stupor. I managed to keep busy shopping for the week and doing my email and some work. Actually the day went quickly for me but I don’t like seeing Annie so listless, but in any event the Vancomycin will end on August 10th. We were disappointed that Sean and his new bride Jeana were not able to visit us today as Annie was just too out of it for any visitors. Jeana tutors a nine year old who had a BMT last year and is doing great so she is very familiar with the issues that we face. It’s only temporary and when it’s all over I hope that Annie will remember the toughest part of the whole deal was that she had to put up with me 24x7 for two or three months…that’s even too much for me to put up with me.

One of our BMT comrades had a rough day today and we prayed a lot for him. He is the oldest BMT recipient in Hopkins history at the age of 72. The issue was his heart and not the BMT. He’s a tough bird and as they were wheeling him out for a regular room he was giving us the high sign!! His son thanked us for praying and it really seemed to help as we thought he was going to have a massive heart attack as did the doctors and nurses. It’s a small world as I found out I did a real estate deal with his brother 20 years ago!!

Other than that the day was boring and boring is good at the Weinberg! God Bless and keep up the prayers.

Our Prayers:
Our BMT comrade will fully recover and return to the IPOP to go on to being the oldest living BMT survivor.
GIVE THANKS FOR HOW GOD HAS CALMED THE WATERS FOR US THOUGH THIS STORM AND HAS MADE IT POSSIBLE FOR ANNIE TO BE CURED!!!!!
GIVE THANKS FOR OUR HERO, TIM!!!!!
GIVE THANKS FOR OUR FAMILY AND FOR YOURSELVES because without you talking to God He may not have had such an open ear.
That we come to know God more and more.
That our family is protected during our time apart.
That Annie experiences little Graft versus Host, but does get a Graft versus Lymphoma
That Annie experiences limited side effects from all of the treatment
That Annie will be protected from fever and infection
That we will have the resources to see this thing through without worry
That Bamboo Solutions will survive and prosper
That Annie will be CURED and we can go on with life and do His Work.

Saturday, 8/03/2002 -Day 1
In Psalm 27 Verse 14 we are told to wait on the Lord as it is He who determines what will happen to us and when our lives will change. We have waited for a long time for this day, (at least in our minds), and He changed our lives yesterday with the gift of life from Tim. As I watched Annie being infused I felt that I was in the presence of an Awesome God and I was. My worries are over and I know that He is in control. Now we have to wait on Him and when it is His time Annie will be cured. I wish you could have been with us when Tim and Annie met for the first time after the transplant. The picture doesn’t come near to capturing the emotions that passed from brother to sister with mom and me looking on. They talk about this day being anticlimactic but I assure you that it was anything but. God Bless Tim!

Now we are again waiting on our Lord to do His work and in the meantime lots of things went on. Annie was being infused with a new antibiotic Vancomycin along with her Cyclosporine, (which by the way is over for high dose infusion after Sunday (YEA!)), A few minutes after the drip began Annie started itching like a monkey in the window and red splotches literally raced across her body. It was really weird, but we didn’t panic and I calmly looked up drug reactions in my book and came across “Red Man (Person) Syndrome”. Well, she sure looked like a red woman to me and our trusty nurse didn’t wait for the young Fellow, but immediately loaded a syringe with Benadryl and shot it into Annie’s Hickman. The plunger wasn’t even halfway in when the red started to recede and she was back to normal accepting for some fat hands. Yvette, our new Fellow (Fellowess?) looked at the situation and said to Annie “You had Redman Syndrome” I almost burst out laughing when I looked at Sallie, who had already cured the anomaly, and saw her role her us and mumble “another newbie”, but even the doctors admit that it is the nurses who run the hospital and deal with the problems. I am already imaging the first words out of Dr. Jones’ mouth on Monday, who is in Ocean City this weekend with his family, “So…..you had Redman’s Syndrome….folks, trust me, it’s the Sallies of this world who will save you. I also couldn’t help to think that God designed our bodies to be drug free and that is why we have such reactions when the body is invaded by something new. It’s so very complex and I wonder how anyone can not believe that we have a Creator. The human body is so cool!!! If I were a bit brighter and 20 years younger I would go to medical school and become a researcher, but…. The rest of the seven days for Vancomycin will be administered with a tandem shot of Benadryl, which will keep Annie from itching, but will also make her groggy. Groggy is probably better than boring for the most part as the time whisks away without awareness of the time.

We met the superstar of allogeneic transplants yesterday who countered all of the horror stories with her own. She looked to be about 48 and had a brother donor transfusion on July 19th . On July 22nd she engrafted and was RELEASED to outpatient status in 13 days!! She had a bit of sore throat and some slight mucositis, but that’s it. Now Annie knows that not everyone has to have a nightmare transplant, which made her feel good. However, everyone is different and this is not a contest, so God will give what He will give to Annie and He will not give her more than she can handle. It’s His promise.

After the Redman Syndrome was solved I rushed off to mom’s to fetch Lily and then we scooted up to New Windsor to pick up Kyle so we could have a family night before the kids leave with Grammy for Pittsburgh and then to Ohio with Aunt Amy. We had a fun evening and just after I changed the bed linens Lily jumped in with her street clothes on. Dad did not think this as funny as she did, but I had missed her so much that I did not even care. (Annie no longer has an immune system as her counts bottomed out this morning which is fabulous news since we thought she’d hold out until next Thursday. This means that the only way now is UP and…..Hereeeeeeeeeesssssssssssssssssss to Tim and engraftment.
Annie, Lily, and I ended up in the king-size bed with Kyle and Grammy in the other room. It was great seeing the kids and Annie was feeling great.

God Bless and keep praying….IT REALLY WORKS!!

Our Prayers:
GIVE THANKS FOR HOW GOD HAS CALMED THE WATERS FOR US THOUGH THIS STORM AND HAS MADE IT POSSIBLE FOR ANNIE TO BE CURED!!!!!
GIVE THANKS FOR OUR HERO, TIM!!!!!
GIVE THANKS FOR OUR FAMILY AND FOR YOURSELVES because without you talking to God He may not have had such an open ear.
That we come to know God more and more.
That our family is protected during our time apart.
That Annie experiences little Graft versus Host, but does get a Graft versus Lymphoma
That Annie experiences limited side effects from all of the treatment
That Annie will be protected from fever and infection
That we will have the resources to see this thing through without worry
That Bamboo Solutions will survive and prosper
That Annie will be CURED and we can go on with life and do His Work.


Friday Evening, 8/2/2002 –Day 0
Praise God!! Today could not have gone any better than it did. Annie is now completely infused with Tim’s marrow and the final few cc’s of cyclosporine have dripped into her line. She looks spectacular, feels marvelous, and if you could see her now you’d get the impression that she spent the day at a Spa and not the day undergoing a rigorous bone marrow transplant. Sallie was our nurse for the Big Event and the minute we began the process you just knew that you were in the good hands of a real professional. Sallie, who started in IPOP at 7 AM this morning, didn’t even break for lunch until after Annie had received the last of Tim’s marrow, which was around 3:30 PM. It’s about 10 PM as I write this and we have been home for about 3 hours. I was too tired to cook so I made a Pizza run to BOP in Fells Point, came home, poured a glass of red wine for mom and me and tackled the pizza. Afterwards I finished up my chores for the day and made arrangements to pick up Kyle and Lily so they could spend some time with Annie before heading off to Pittsburgh and Columbus, Ohio. I can’t say that this day was boring and the scene at the end of the day when Tim WAS Wheeled up to IPOP to see Annie was heart rendering. Brothers and sisters can be closely bonded, but never any closer than Annie and Tim became today. For all practical purposes without a detailed explanation, Annie and Tim will soon be like identical twins who won’t look alike or different from before, but will now pretty much share the same DNA structure. This bond will never be broken and words can never express our gratitude for Tim’s generosity. I too am tired to write any more so I am off to bed as tomorrow is another day. Annie can be reached at 410-356-8410 tomorrow. God Bless You All and PRAY, PRAY, PRAY!!

Friday Morning, 8/2/2002 Day 0
At 5 AM this morning I jumped up out of bed and into my sweats to fetch our hero for the transplant. I promised to pick him up at 5:30 so I grabbed the paper and ran out the door. Arriving at the Wyndam Hotel at 5:15 AM I see Tim standing outside looking into the Shula’s sports bar watching ESPN. I yelled to him…”Are you crazy, you could get mugged out here in the dark. No skydiving or other stuff until after noon today.” My job would be done when I delivered the goods to the PACU unit at Hopkins, so off we went and after stopping at every green light and crosswalk we arrived at the center with 15 minutes to spare. Tim suggested that I drop him out front and I said “No No Nanette” “I am sticking with you like white on rice.” (I can’t imagine calling Annie and her mom to tell them I have lost Tim.) About 10 minutes after we got to the 3rd floor a young lady came to get him and I left for the Chinese diner on Liberty Street for coffee. I needed a place to hang out so I would not wake anyone up at the apartment until later. It’s about time to get Annie up for the Big Day. Mom is having her coffee and reading the Sunpapers and I am doing mail stuff. I will be putting an update on my voice mail around 2 PM today if you want to check in. 410-916-4316 or toll free 877-414-8152.
God Bless and PRAY, PRAY, PRAY.

A friend of ours sent me this verse last night, which I think is most appropriate for this day and everyday of our lives.

Though the fig tree should not blossom
And there be no fruit on the vines,
Though the yield of the olive should fail
And the fields produce no food,
Though the flock should be cut off from the fold
And there be no cattle in the stalls,
Yet I will exult in the LORD,
I will rejoice in the God of my salvation.
The Lord GOD is my strength,
And He has made my feet like hinds' feet,
And makes me walk on my high places.

Habakkuk 3:17-19

Thursday, 8/1/2002 Day -1
Talking about awesome strength from God. Annie finished the day out great and is ready to go!!! Our Hero Donor Tim showed up at noon for his pre-op instructions and Annie’s mom arrived from Pittsburgh around 2 PM. I left Annie in their able hands and rushed off to see Dr. Chun, to try to get my tooth fixed that has been driving me nuts for the past several weeks. I’m such a wimp. Today was day 2 of Cyclosporine and Annie did have some minor side effects consisting of a blurred vision when looking into light and some slight hand tremors, but nothing worth more than a comment. We arrived at IPOP later than expected this morning so Nurse Helen was paging me as we walked through the door. In her sweet way she told me to call anytime I change habits since we are always on time or she’ll break my leg. (She’s a worrier and worriers are good on the healthcare end of our deal.) Last night was a good night, once the Ativan kicked in, and if the way she felt today is any indication we may be over the hump for a few days. Everyone says the heavy hit from the chemo doesn’t come until a week later, but I have heard all of that before and though we are ready to deal with it, we do not take it for granted that it will occur as this is our Father’s domain. We can expect more fatigue next week as the chemo gives it a final kick and her counts drop to “0”, which I will predict will happen Wednesday. We are just giving it to God and letting Him decide how things will be and they will be what He wills it to be…that we are certain of.

Naturally, our global prayer has not changed, which is for ‘the cure”, but we still have some specific short term requests that are very important. Next week when Annie will be at her lowest we are praying for protection and for few or no side effects, especially mucositis and gastronomical inflammations. She will also be prone to severe fevers, infections, and sores throughout her entire GI tract that can be a painful experience. So please continue to pray hard for her. Also, for Tim our hero who is making this all possible. God Bless you all and we will see you all tomorrow after the big day!!!


Wednesday, 7/31/2002 Day -2
This was a real special day as we watched the last drip of poison ever to be infused into Annie’s body leave the bottle. Cancer goodbye. Eight solid days of chemotherapy are over and we are resting tomorrow; well, it’s not exactly what I would call resting, even if that is what is marked on her treatment chart. We will need to arrive at the IPOP around 9:30AM for a 6 hour drip of Cyclosporine, which will suppress her immune system as well as Tim’s marrow to prevent his T-cell from attacking Annie’s body and prayerfully eliminate serious graft disease. This is a 15 day infusion that is accompanied by hydration for the first 5 days. After the 15 day infusion she will be on oral drugs for at least a year or more, depending on her body’s reaction to the transplant.

Annie was a bit queasy today due to the added drugs and hydration, but at 7 PM we were on our way home post haste. Tonight will be a rest night since today was such a grueling day on her body. John gave her an “A” for the entire 8 days and I added a few pluses. She is quite the trooper and seldom complains about what was happening to her. We are talking “cure” and praying that the next 92 days are as event free as the past 8 were. Thank You God!!

I was able to sneak out for several hours to have lunch with my buddy, Larry at Shula’s. We had a great time and it was good to see him since we were last together at Sean’s wedding in June. The rest of the day I did some work and took care of business so it was a great day for me, too.

Keep up your prayers, especially at Noon on Friday, when the first marrow infusion is scheduled to be done. The second infusion of baby stem cells should be around 4 PM and we hope to be home by 8 PM. It will be a long day, but one of extreme significance since it will mark day one of Annie’s new birthday as her marrow begins to give way to Tim’s. I know in my heart that it will be an awesome day and I wish everyone could be there person to enjoy the joy, but I know you will be able to see her soon. She sends her love to everyone.

Please be sure to pray for Tim, who in his role as our hero will be a bit sore south of the border after the harvest. He’s a gutsy guy and a great golfer. Annie and I plan to be out on the links early next spring to see if she has his stroke, too. God Bless you Tim!!! God Bless you all!!!

Tuesday, 7/30/2002 Day -3
After sleeping poorly last night Annie got up a bit later so it was rush hour and we got to the hospital a bit late. Our experiment went great and she had a wonderful day and night taking am Ativan in the morning and a repeat at 5 PM. Her nurse today is Melanie, who just returned from participating in a Triathlon in Boston, where she came in under 1.5 hours in an event that the pros do in just over an hour. Looking at her you can tell she is a lean mean running machine. Also, she is most industrious as she is pursuing a double master’s degree in Public Health and Nursing. She had a great sense of humor and her knowledge of BMT process was overwhelmingly comforting.

My sister Debbie visited today and it was like old home week for her since she ran the first oncology center at Johns Hopkins in the 70’s and actually took care of their first Leukemia patient. She retired in 1987 to be a mostly full time mom and wife but still teaches nursing at Villa Julie. She had hired many of the old timers including Gina Syzmanski, who founded True IPOP. So it was fun for all as she also knows Dr. Jones who was probably a fellow in her early years. Debbie spent all day so I was able to have lunch at Attman’s on Lombard Street with several old cronies. I was so happy to have the world’s best hot dog and corn beef that I treated my buddies. It brought back fond memories of the 50’s when dad and I used to hit Attman’s on a Saturday morning for a dog or two…then finished off 50 or so oysters on the docks as dessert…those were the days.

Melanie held my feet to the fire and reviewed my notes to be certain that I was taking good care of my Bubbie, (I’ll tell the story of the genesis of this nickname later), and I think I passed as she let me take Annie her home that night.

Well, we have a Triple Crown Winner and got away without the threat of a lasix experience. Annie is a great patient and does exactly what she is told to do. Our nutritionist, Tar, stopped by with some great shake recipes in case Annie isn’t up to eating steak and eggs next week. I have to use Hagen Das ice cream or B&J’s as the shakes need to be rich and high in calories. Please pray that I can make great shakes for Annie but that I do not partake myself, lest I end up 2 tons by the time she goes home.

We went off to bed early last night and I think Annie had a good night’s rest. She is still snoozing away at 6:30 AM and I am about to wake her. I got up at 4:20 to get ready for the day and Baltimore is quite boring at 4:30 in the morning, but boring is good!!!

Remember us in your prayers. I will repeat our requests:

Naturally, our global prayer is for ‘the cure”, but we have some specific short term requests that are very important. Next week is when Annie will be at her lowest WBC post transplant. We are praying for protection and for few or no side effects, especially mucositis and gastronomical inflammations. Due to the high volume of poison in her system she will be prone to severe infections and sores throughout her entire GI tract. This can be a painful experience that we wish to avoid as makes for a really “yucky” time. It can even get bad enough to require a respirator and IV nutrition. So please pray hard for no side effects. God Bless please stay in touch.


Monday, 7/29/2002 Day -4
Again, an early start and mad dash to the IPOP this morning for Day 2 of Cytoxan. In case you are curious Annie won the 2nd jewel of the Triple Crown race and is ready for the Belmont on Tuesday. But, today was a more difficult day as Annie bravely elected to forgo her morning Ativan injection. This turned out to be a bit of a mistake later that afternoon as she battled nausea and frayed nerves. As for the day in a nut shell, it was boring and boring is good. Sallie was our nurse and she is a jovial rotund young mother of 19 month old Zachary, who sounds like a hand full, but as many of us know that is typical for little munchkins. Sallie is a very good nurse who was always laughing and telling stories so we got along real well. I took a break and did some shopping to get ready for Annie’s mom and Tim coming to town on Thursday for Friday’s Big Event. Both Dr. Jones and Dr. Hann stopped by for their usual routine visits and all was pronounced well.

Speaking of Time our donor hero, we had an unexpected surprise today as Tim was in town to have a blood test redone. It seems as if the BMT gnomes forgot that July had 31 days and one of the blood tests has only a 30 day shelf life…so…Carolyn Coleman called Tim in a panic and asked him to come to Hopkins ASAP for the test. This is where we thanked God that our donor isn’t our west coast brother, Paul Carroll. Tim called me on his way to the train and remarked that he’d do anything for the love of his sister, but he was quite sure that he will have no further love of hospitals or lawyers, since the sole purpose of retesting is to prevent a later law suit. Even under the circumstances it was great seeing him. What an ordeal he has been through, but he is a trooper and his wife, Kim, is the greatest!!!

Around 4 PM Sallie gave Annie an Ativan injection and things got back to normal. Nausea is the number one side effect and just about 100f those who have a BMT experience some during this phase. We ended the day by having “dinner” at the hospital and around 7 PM we were on our way home.

Apart from Kyle’s call from camp, it was not a great night. About a half hour after her 10 PM meds Annie accidentally burped up her pills while brushing her teeth. Baking soda can have this effect on people but it was still a weird experience, especially for the newbies like us. So…we called the charge nurse on duty who told us not to worry and get some sleep. I slept like a rock but Annie had a restless night, being somewhat shook-up by the burping incident, so we decided that on Tuesday we would take the Ativan. This time we would try only a half dose in the morning and keep the other half ready for the afternoon.

Naturally, our global prayer is for ‘the cure”, but we have some specific short term requests that are very important. Next week is when Annie will be at her lowest WBC post transplant. We are praying for protection and for few or no side effects, especially mucositis and gastronomical inflammations. Due to the high volume of poison in her system she will be prone to severe infections and sores throughout her entire GI tract. This can be a painful experience that we wish to avoid as makes for a really “yucky” time. It can even get bad enough to require a respirator and IV nutrition. So please pray hard for no side effects. God Bless please stay in touch.


Sunday, 7/28/2002 Day -5
Today began around 5 AM to get things ready for our first 12 hour Cytoxan day. Although the actual Cytoxan infusion only takes an hour, there is about 9 hours of hydration consisting of 4 liters of saline solution pumped into Annie’s system through her trusted Hickman catheter. The Hickman may not be the most attractive ornament to wear on a date but it is the most functional piece of equipment near and dear to any cancer patient’s heart. We can’t imagine how difficult it was for cancer victims in the days before embedded ports and catheters, but I understand those who survived the treatments had life long problems with their veins. We aren’t complaining as it will be taken out around Day 50, God willing and if all is doing well.

The object of this chemo exercise is to void equal amounts of fluids from the system as is taken in by the hydration. Without this and the wonder drug Mesna, peoples’ bladders would be destroyed by the toxic chemotherapy chemicals that are induced. If you loose and do not expel sufficient fluids they give you Lasix, which all cancer nurses described as the drug that will make you “pee like a racehorse”, and I don’t know about you but our idea of a good time is not running to the toilet every 10 minutes hooked to a huge IV pump. Nope, we are going to do our best to win this hand. Fortunately, Annie has always drunk great amounts of fluids so her bladder is not the shy type, which we are hoping will give her the edge.

We both slept so-so the night before and Annie was quite groggy after being zapped with 2 Mg. Of Lorazepam so she spent much of the day in a tired and sleepy state. When we arrived at 7:30 AM our buddy John had everything ready and he greeted us with his trademark great belly laugh before getting down to the morning routine of blood draws and the flushing of lines. He then hooked her up to her daily companion, flipped the switch, and it was “off to the races”. It looked as if we wouldn’t even get “show” money after the first hour or so, as much more was going in than was coming out; but, in her true competitive spirit and with some coaxing and water trips by me, she pulled ahead in the stretch around 2 PM. According to John Annie set a new track record of over 5200 cc’s. So, I am glad my money was on her today!! Speaking of “so”, Annie pointed out to me that every doctor in the BMT unit that she sees starts their conversation with “So….how are you feeling, how did you do last night, etc.. I have started to notice it too.

We had a really great surprise as my mom and dad came by with Lily to pay us a visit. Lily, is off to the beach on Monday with cousin Olivia, so she was really upbeat and we had a great time together in the BMT suite. After she left the rest of the day was uneventful and boring. I tried plugging into every socket in the center but couldn’t find a hot internet connection so I gave up and read until it was time to go. Annie did so well that we got out a half hour early and rushed home to a great dinner of spaghetti and portabella sauce. Afterwards Annie returned calls and we went off to bed. It was a frustrating night for sleep, but we managed to get a few hours of sleep.

But for fatigue, Praise God Annie had only a little sore throat from the chemo and nausea was not a factor. Keep praying for her to respond to her treatment and that she has little or no side effects for the rest of her stay. Actually, the most dangerous period in the first several weeks is known as “neutropenia” (little or “0” white blood cells), which will occur several days post transplant. This is when the only thing That Annie will be doing is going back to forth to the hospital wearing a mask to keep dangerous bacteria away from her body as much as possible. We also learned some great news from Dr. Jones. He has being doing Annie’s type of transplant for Lymphoma for 10 years and not one patient has relapsed if they make it two years post transplant, so know you know this is our primary prayer that she be cured and the more we hear the better we think our chances are and with God on her side it’s a done deal!!! God Bless, Gary

Annie’s verse for today: Saturday, 7/27/2002 Day -6
“’For I know the plans that I have for you,’ Declares the Lord,
‘Plans to prosper you and not to harm you,
Plans to give you a hope and a future.’”
Jer 29:11

Saturday was another easy day, but certainly not boring. Two of Annie’s buddies from Wakefield Valley Bible Church came for a visit in the morning so when they arrived I took off for the Lexington Market, a destination that we used to frequent many years ago when we lived in the city. I had my all time favorite breakfast of 2 Polock Johnny’s Polish Sausages “All the way”, which is everything you can imagine but the kitchen sink. Then I stopped at Faidley’s for their World Famous Lump Crab cake that I haven’t had for at least 5 years. So it was a gastronomical day of delight and I made sure I get home with some Rolaids just in case. I am very fortunate that Annie can’t eat at the market or I would definitely need a king size bed when we got back home in New Windsor. Bev, Linda, and Annie had a great time as usual and I don’t think the Park Charles will be ever the same again. They gave Annie a wonderful Bible Commentary so that she can dig deeper in the Word and I am sure they had some a great fun day. I came home fat and happy and fixed the girls a stir fry and fruit lunch, which I think they enjoyed. At 2 PM Annie too her meds and we left for Hopkins for our daily checkup that took all of about an hour. I still can’t imagine what folks do during all of their spare hours when they do an inpatient BMT, but as I have learned over the past 6 months or so, boring is good. One of Annie’s regular all day meds is Ativan (Lorazepam). Ativan tends to keep her mellow and it’s a nice state of being, as it doesn’t make you looses your sense of who you are, what you are doing, or where are you that other similar drugs tend to do. It also helps keep queasiness in check. Anyone who knows Annie knows that she is a mellow laid back person anyway so she and Lorazepam get along real well together. Around 5 PM Sean and Jeana, our new daughter-in-law (6/1) came for dinner and we had a great time looking at some old as well as recent pictures. Kids sure do grow up quickly. Dinner was great and the Merlot was just right, except Annie passed on the hard stuff in favor of R.C. Knudsen’s “Just Grape”, the Don Perignon of grape juices. As always it was a great time and Sean and Jeana are such a cute couple, who just adopted the strangest looking dog I have ever seen that is a cross between a basset hound and either a retriever or German Shepard. “PoohBear” has a huge head and little body. I am wondering which breed was the dad. Oh well, they are young and having fun.

After the “kids’ left Annie napped a bit, watching bits and pieces of Law & Order reruns in between, until midnight when she took her last meds before retiring. We talked a little about tomorrow morning when we begin the first of 4 days of Cytoxan chemotherapy, which requires her to be hydrated with over 4 liters of saline and other solutions. This will be a 12 hour day which is really grueling from the standpoint of discomfort and absolute boredom, so there was a bit of anxiety that was quickly resolved by falling to sleep and taking it one day at a time.

Please keep praying that Annie will tolerate her chemotherapy with minimal or no side effects and that the drugs will kill all of the cancer in her system and prepare her for Tim’s stem cells on Friday. Also, pray that she does not get fevers from miscellaneous infections that will necessitate her being kept in the hospital overnight. Most of all, pray that our family will be delivered from the grips of this disease and that Annie will come home “Cured”. God has Blessed us with so much answered prayer and we are so indebted to each of you who have been diligently praying for us, because this has been the key to Annie’s great response to her cancer.

Here is an idea of the type and quantity of drugs that Annie is taking to combat her disease and to get ready for Day “0”.

Busulfan – chemotherapy pills take orally 4 or 5 times per day that total over 600 pills over 4 days. Busulfan is actually one of the few drugs that cross the barrier to the brain as most alkalizing agents like CHOP and Cytoxan do not.

Cyclophosphamide (Cytoxan) 325 Mg taken daily by IV infusion for 4 days along with 16 liters of fluids to keep the kidneys and bladder flushed and in good working order.

Cyclosporine is given to keep her immune system suppressed and avoids Graft versus Host Disease that can create some wicked problems in her recovery process. This is taken during Cytoxan phase of treatment

Dexamethasone is a steroid for nausea taken during Cytoxan phase of treatment.

Fluconazole is an oral antibiotic to control fungal infections such as Candida and HSV, which is administered daily until all risk is ablated.

Ativan (Lorazepam) is an anti-anxiety drug taken 2-5 times daily.

Mesna is taken by IV infusion daily during the Cytoxan phase to maintain the bladder.

Norfloxacin is an oral antibiotic to control miscellaneous infections, which is administered daily until all risk is ablated.

Zofran is a wonder drug that is take both by IV infusion as well as orally on a daily basis until all chemotherapy is completed.

Dilantin is taken orally daily for a week to counter the side effects of Busulfan, especially seizures.

Valacyclovir is an oral antibiotic to control infections, which is administered daily until all risk is ablated.

Vancomycin is an antibiotic given by IV infusion to control infections, which is administered daily fpr about 8 days or until all risk ablated.

Magnesium Sulfate was administered on the first day to increase magnesium levels that will be depleted during the chemotherapy. This along with potassium will be a regular occurrence.





Annie’s verse for today: Friday, 7/26/2002 Day -7
God is our refuge and strength,
An ever-present help in trouble.
Therefore, we will not fear, though the earth give way
And the mountains fall into the heart of the sea;
Psalm 46: 1-2

What a great surprise today!! Thanks to my mom and dad and some really good friends we were able to spend the day with Kyle and Lily. Kyle had never been to our new apartment so it was a new adventure for him. We had Tombstone Pizza for lunch and then dashed off to the hospital for our 2 PM checkup. The kids got to see our other hangout and we got to see all of our best buddies to get blood draws, pills, and advice. Lily watched Helen change Annie’s Hickman dressing, which I don’t think was as much fun as she thought it would be, but she was a trooper. Kyle in typical fashion slept in the waiting area or read his car magazine, totally bored. He got to meet Dr. Jones, who turned 50 today and did not know it but there was a big surprise party brewing at the hospital for Friday evening. Afterwards, we rushed off to Reisterstown to meet mom and dad, so Kyle could get his hair cut before leaving for Camp Tohiglo on Sunday. The six of usWe had a great dinner at Toninnio’s Italian and then Annie and I came back to the apartment for the evening, and learned that we haven’t missed a thing by not having TV at home. . It was. It was great fun even to you it may seem a bit boring. Remember, to us BORING IS GREATTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!! God Bless You, Gary

Thursday, 7/25/2002 Day -8

Annie’s verse for today:
Why are you downcast, O my soul?
Why so disturbed within me?
Put your hope in God.
For I will yet praise Him,
My Savior and my God.
Psalm 42:11

Thank God!!! I didn’t have to count any pills last night or today. Annie has done marvelously and expect for being tired from taking her Activan medication, she has not had the slightest discomfort. Interestingly enough, she is hiccupping a lot, which is one of the side effects of Busulfan. It’s kind of funny in her case, but there have been folks who get chronic hiccups, which can become quite serious. Hopefully, the rest of our days will be as boring as today. Boring is good when you are undergoing a BMT. After doing the 4 AM routine medications, both Annie and I fell back asleep and didn’t get up until 7 AM! We shared some coffee, Annie made some return calls then went back to sleep and I started my daily routine.
At 10 AM we took our meds and I cleaned up a bit for the maid. (This concept has always escaped me, but it’s something Annie always does so I am just keeping to tradition) We took in lunch at Java Joes on Charles Street then after a brief walk around the neighborhood, which we cut short due to ongoing construction; we took off for our 2 PM IPOP visit, which again turned out to be boring but very enlightening. (BTW, construction sites pose one of the greatest risks to Annie due to a fungal infection called Aspergillus’s, which causes a virile pneumonia that can be fatal to immune-suppressed people. http://www.cdc.gov/ncidod/hip/pneumonia/1_asper.htm)

We were originally assigned to Dr Fuchs as our attending physician but Dr. Richard “Rick” Jones, who is the actual Director of the Bone Marrow Transplant program decided after he met Annie that he was going to be her attending physician, which is a fantastic asset to us since he is world renown in her disease and type of transplant. He has been at Johns Hopkins for over 18 years and even remembers my sister Debbie when she was the nursing director for oncology outpatient clinic in its formative years. Dr. Jones started the clinical trial program that we are part of about 10 years ago and has treated over 2000 patients. We were really buoyed, to the point of tears, when he told us that Annie’s statistical worse case mortality during treatment is less than 10nd that with her lack of previous treatment in a first remission, her youth, strength, and fortitude gives her a better than the 80cure” factor initially projected by Dr. Flinn. So the news gets better every day. (We didn’t discuss God’s role in all of this, but we know that He is totally responsible for the outcome and we are praying that it will be the “cure”.) Dr. Jones also explained that Annie has had her indolent disease for many years, but it just woke up last year. From a gene misfire a single lymphoplasmatoid cell was created that her immune system did not kill and She has been building up these B-cell cancer cells that that grow and won’t sluff-off for years. Eventually they took over her bone marrow and reached a point when they began to overtake her system, when she presented her symptoms in December 2001. He also confirmed that she is atypical at her age to having her disease that mostly strikes people over 60, but it happens. As Dr. Matsui put it, and as Dr. Jones confirmed, it was “nothing she did in college or high school that caused her cancer”. That puts a lot of us at ease. What a Blessing to have such wonderful folks on our team and we must continue to pray for them, their families, and especially their wisdom.

Later we went over our pill schedule with Helen and she changed Annie’s Hickman dressing so we could leave for home. On the way we did some grocery shopping in beautiful downtown Fells Point, where we lived when we were married in 1985. It is a bit different from shopping in Westminster, but fun none the less. But, as Annie and I both agree even being able to make a trip to the dentist is fun, as we do not take any breath for granted.

We get so many calls, from all of the folks in the real world and Annie just loves to call them back, so on a typical evening I am doing my chores and Annie is burning up my cell phone. I am going to make an appointment for her at the ear clinic next week to have a cell embedded in her body so her arm doesn’t get tired. Last night I grilled 2 of the finest steaks that we have ever eaten, along with home made organic potato French fries cooked in organic oil, a salad, and grapes. This meal would have been $150 bucks at Shula’s Steakhouse, thanks to the fabulous Omaha Steaks supplied by our friends, the Goldberg’s, and our son Russ. Our nutritionist, Tara, who is also super, will no longer allow Annie to have rare meat, but her steak was GREAT anyway. YEAH GOLDBERG’S AND RUSS GAMBER, since I get to partake, too!!

Praise God….It was a wonderful day.
Continue to pray that Annie tolerates the drug protocol and that they do the job as intended in her system. We also pray that she will engraft and that the transplant will be a total success and cure her forever. Don’t forget to pray for our children, family, and super friends who are helping us out everyday. Lily also says not to forget out cat “Skittles” who is living in the garage now and will probably spend the rest of her life their when we come home. She should still be happy with her 3 squares and other perks, seeing that she lived in the streets before she found us the day we moved to New Windsor. Also, Kyle is off for another camp this weekend with his buddies from Wakefield Valley Youth Group.

The pharmacy changed our chemo schedule and I will have to wake Annie up at 3 AM this morning, so I’ve got to run now. LOL and God Bless you guys. Gary


Wednesday, 7/24/2002 Day -9

Today was what I pray will be the toughest day that we must endure in our journey. From a procedural standpoint it was pretty easy, but to us it was the day of reality, especially for Annie. I liken it to Lindbergh’s solo flight across the Atlantic at the point where he must have realized there was no return and his first thought was did he have enough fuel. We came to that point yesterday, which to say the least was quite emotional; but, as it is written The Great Comforter touched us and the dark clouds covering us just broke into great rays of beautiful sunshine. One of those rays was John. John will be our primary nurse for our transplant, and take it from me he is no Greg Fucher of Meet the Parents fame. John is huge, bald, tattooed, ringed, and solid as the Rock of Gibraltar, and my money would be on him if he were to go toe to toe with Jesse Ventura. Yet, John is as gentle and loving as a Monk and God just spoke to us through him as he comforted Annie.

John worked the railroad for 18 years before becoming a nurse 10 years ago. He was in pediatric transplants for most of those years and recently transitioned into adult care. At first we did not know what to make of him and were somewhat skeptical about his caring for us, but we had a great lesson in judging books by their covers. John is a BMT expert to the core and he inspired such confidence by his knowledge and understanding of Annie’s situation. I also got the impression that he initially thought she was my daughter when he commented on how young she looked.

We were in IPOP from 2 PM until 10 PM except for a break for dinner at a great Italian restaurant in Little Italy, Caesar’s Den. We both highly recommend it and it was as good as I recall from 15 years ago, which is the last time that I visited. After dinner we went back and John explained all of the medications that we needed to take home with us and the schedule for taking. I did have to get her up at 4 AM for the first dose, but the second wasn’t required until 10 AM, which wasn’t bad.

All in all, what began as a rough day ended quite smoothly. Monica was our nurse for the 10 PM and 10:01 PM blood draws, which measure the pharmakinetics of the Busulfan to determine if the planned dosages are correct. We will get these results on Thursday and if Annie is adequately processing the chemo passes this test, she won’t need extra blood draws on Thursday. Today she had at least 10 blood draws. Thank God for the Hickman!!!

Again, we know that our trust in Him and your prayers will bring our family together again, together for many years to come. Unwavering faith is the foundation of Annie’s Great Spirit and it is her faith that will see us through. If Webster were alive today he would define “courageous” as Anne Gamber.

Continue to pray that Annie tolerates the drug protocol and that they do the job as intended in her system. We also pray that she will engraft and that the transplant will be a total success and cure her forever. We are also praying for little if any side effects, especially nausea. The last thing I want to see happen is that she throws up the 32 Busulfan pills she takes every 6 hours, because if she does get sick within a half hour of taking the meds, I have to count them and replace them from the “puke bag”. Not my idea of a fun time, but you gotta do what you gotta do.

God Bless!!

Tuesday, July 23, 2002 Day -10

Well, the operation to insert the Hickman catheter went great. Praise God! It took Dr Chun about 1 ½ hours, while Annie was actually awake, but in a twilight, to do the procedure. Dr. Chun is a petite Asian lady who looked about 18 years old but has been doing surgery for over 10 years. Dr. Chun is an Interventional Radiologist and did the procedure using a sonogram and fluoroscope to guide her. 10 years ago this was done as guess work, but today the surgeon can actually view what is happening in the veins and heart as the catheter is being inserted. In the typical Carroll fashion, Annie was up from the table and on the cell a few minutes later, although she did have to stay in recovery for an hour to comply with hospital procedure. Afterwards we grabbed a sandwich at “Juice & Java” and then we were off IPOP to have the dressing changed and get instructions for our big day Wednesday when Annie will drop the first of 45 Busulfan pills (which will continue each day for 4 days). They will also take her blood at least 12 times for kinetic studies, (Praise God for Dr. Hickman), to be certain that her system is balancing with the drugs. This officially begins her transplant chemo protocol that will destroy her immune system in a matter of days and prayerfully kill the cancer that is in her body to make room for Tim’s marrow on August 2. The first day of Busulfan will last from 2 PM until 10 PM, requiring us to be in IPOP those hours. If things go really well the remaining 3 days will not take more than 3 or 4 hours. We also got to meet Nurse Rick who changed the Hickman dressing and showed us what to watch out for as we attempt to avoid all infections. We must always keep in mind that an infection or cut, even the most minor, can be deadly to an immune suppressed person, so we won’t take any chances. Annie also reminded me to be sure that Nurse Rick washed his hands before putting on sterile gloves, which he did. That is how sensitive she is to bacteria. My hands are practically gone form washing so much!! God is amazing. Rick was assisted by Rachel, who is a summer nursing intern from Westminster and knows one of our closest friends, who are best friends of her parents. Annie has met her dad who is a missionary that speaks to many of the local churches near where we live. Rachel is such a joy and so filled with the Holy Spirit that we just know she is another sign that God is walking down the path with us hand in hand. AND, Rick is from Pittsburgh and his Aunts and Uncles know Annie’s brother-in-law’s family from church. It is a small world

We are so happy that we are doing the transplant as True IPOP inpatient/outpatient, but the difference between what you may understand outpatient to mean versus what it means to us is that our hospital bed is in a beautiful apartment without a million people and umpteen germs floating around, as opposed to others transplantees, who must spend the nights getting awakened for no reason other than to see if they will wake up. The primary requirement is that I must be with her 24x7 anytime she is not in the hospital IPOP unit. Believe me this is a lot tougher on her than on me, if you get my drift. I can’t even go downstairs to get the mail without her, which when she hits “0” will not be allowed anyway. So, our buddy Bernard, the concierge, will be bringing our daily paper and mail to us. (This is the life. Well not exactly an always fun life, as you will read about shortly) We asked why more people weren’t doing “True IPOP’ like us and were told by Gina, the program’s founder, that insurance companies don’t want to pay for this program since it costs the same or a bit more as total inpatient and requires more paperwork. It also makes better sense for a patient to do it this way since they transition home so much easier after the typical 100 days away and “insurance” and “sense” don’t always go hand in hand. But our heroes, GOLDEN RULE INSURANCE, http://www.goldenrule.com, are much more progressive and have agreed to pay 100f our costs including our gorgeous apartment and all living expenses during the transplant and afterwards until Annie is home gain for good. I would recommend Golden Rule to anyone and at $180 per month for family coverage of $3 million, you can’t beat it. To get this rate all you need to do is assume a liability of $5000 as your annual deductible. If you use all of your deductible it is still far less expensive than Blue Cross, which by the way would not have paid for our program. And if you don’t get sick like our family ever did before cancer you are really way ahead. The insurance coordinator at Hopkins told me that there is NO insurance company that she has worked with that has been as liberal and easy to deal with as ours. God Bless GR, as they do live by the GOLDEN RULE. The significance of their cancer liability is that in Annie’s lifetime her medical costs will exceed 7 figures. GR has already paid over $100K to date in claims and Annie’s transplant will probably cost $225K over the next 100 days assuming no complications. Then there is intense follow-up for 5 years and less intense for the next 40 or so afterwards.

Here is a cute story. As many of you know our family has been for the most part TV’ less for the past decade, so it is quite a novelty to have a TV that really works and can actually get reception. They call it cable TV!! (For the past several years my mom, God Bless her, records the only regular show we watch, Law & Order, and a special event once in awhile for us to view on our VCR.) When Lily was here Sunday she was surfing channels, so last night Annie and I decided to try it out to watch old L&O reruns on TNT. After about a half hour of me trying to figure out how it worked I finally called Lily at moms and she explained the cable box thing to me. (By the way, I used to own a cable TV company, Ultra Vision, with my buddy Gary Goldberg, but he was the technical wizard and obviously I only made the coffee and cleaned the cable boxes.) Annie was quite unimpressed with my lack of TV skills, but I was later redeemed when we learned that the local cable company was down last night and nobody in our building had TV. Oh well, it’s another one for the book. I am positive we didn’t miss much, except for our friend Sponge Bob Square Pants.

My role is called ‘Caregiver” by the folks at Hopkins. It’s a wonderful chance for me to repay a bit Annie for her many years of dedication and love. I figure we’ll be squared-up in 2050, as even now she keeps doing for me. My day begins around 5 AM. Every hour, everyday, I need to keep track of everything that Annie does, including all that she eats, literally how she looks from head to toe (for signs of dreaded Graft vs. Host Disease, infections, fungus, etc.), dispense medications, which today consisted of only 3 meds at 3 different times, but will be increased to 7 or 8 meds, and over 50 pills. (Naturally, I missed my first deadline on day 1 last night, so Annie is already needling me about whether I am competent enough to do the job. I think the TV thing still has her scared.) My excuse is that I do not have my Blackberry, which I broke last week, so I am a bit confused about how to keep everything straight. This is what technology is doing for our kids, too. I also must clean the bathroom spotless several times each day and check the quantity and quality of everything that goes on. I cook and wash ALL sheets (I will never own a King Size bed!!), clothes, towels, etc., everyday as things must be sterile. I have to clean door knobs, laptops, furniture and the kitchen as often as they are used. Now, I honestly know what it takes to be a mom, but I only have to do this for a few months!! I will tell you guys that working in the sewers of New York along the side of Ed Norton would be a lot easier. I also will need to fend off folks who might want to give her a hug or kiss for love, but I wouldn’t trade this job for a billion dollars as it is helping me understand the true meaning of Love like our Father loves us.

We give our Thanks to God for creating us, Johns Hopkins, and for making all of this possible. We give Thanks to Him for giving us the potential to live a natural disease free life. We give Thanks to Him for protecting our 4 kids, our new daughter-in-law, and our great family during this trying time. We give special Thanks for our donor hero, Tim and his wife Kim who has helped us so much. We give Thanks to Him for making it less trying than so many other folk’s experiences. And we give Thanks for Him being Him.

God has been so very faithful to us as He has taken care of all our needs and even more. Annie looks, feels, and acts healthier than any other patient that I have seen so far and I think she actually looks better that all of the nurses and doctors, too. She says I am biased, but I ‘m not. I keep waiting for her to tell me that this is an April Fool’s joke, but we all know that it isn’t. I have no idea how anyone can face such adversity without a strong belief in God and His Salvation. It really must be hard. She is at such peace and is totally confident that she will be cured of cancer as it is what He has promised if we believe. We are not troubled as He asks us to give Him our troubles for his shoulders, which are broad. Well, that is just what we have done and although this is no vacation, sometimes it feels as if it is.

Our Prayers are for God to heal Annie and deliver us from this wilderness. We ask Him to make this as easy as possible and that she tolerate all of her treatment and be protected form further disease and future infections. We also ask that I live a long life and when I go she will stand over me and smile about those good old days 30 years ago when I still had teeth. God Bless You ALL. We love you and we need your prayers and kind thoughts. Do not hesitate to call or write us. We love your emails. ALSO, be sure to let us know your needs so we can pray for you as God really Blesses those who pray for others. See you tomorrow.

Monday, July 22, 2002 Day -11

Well, here it is 5:00AM. Lily and Annie and still sleeping as Lily got to spend what may be her last night with us for awhile. But she’s off to grandmas later this morning and will be getting royally spoiled for the next two weeks as she so well deserves. I am back on my double duty schedule. It seems as if God puts me into overdrive when Annie’s health schedule gets complicated. He wakes me early and lets me stay up late, but I feel good and am ready to kick cancer’s butt, with His help of course. It’s awesome only sleeping 5 hours and still charging hard for the day; it’s as if I am getting another 1/8th out of life.

Today is our first official day in IPOP for the BMT. At noon we meet with the IPOP nurse and Annie has her blood drawn, (so what’s new?), for her baseline counts. Then it is off to see Dr. Matsui to sign all of the consents. It’s the legalese meeting, where they try to convince you that you are crazy to let them do what they are going to do to you, and you ought to just go home and come back when you are feeling better. Fortunately for me Annie is a lawyer so I am not worried about trying to understand the lingo as she will interpret it for me. I have already read the advance papers and but for my wife, I now understand why Shakespeare said what he said about all lawyers. http://www.hopkinskimmelcancercenter.org/clientpages/ipopcarecontinuum.cfm

Tomorrow, Annie is being operated on at 10:30 AM to place a heavy duty Hickman catheter in her heart (Please pray for her and for me.) She will be asleep, but I won’t; that is, unless I can talk her anesthesiologist into giving me some of those great drugs, too. The purpose of the Hickman is to let the medical team pump things into and take things out of her circulation so that her veins are not damaged from the constant blood draws and chemicals. The higher purpose is to allow the doctors to give her our hero Tim’s marrow on August 2nd. Yeah, Tim!!!!
http://www.meditheses.com/997-962.htm

On Wednesday (7/24) she will literally have her blood drawn at least 8-10 times as they check on the progress of her first Chemo drug, Busulfan, so they can properly adjust the dosage for the 4 days. This is the only chemo drug that she will take in pill form…about 45 pills per day. http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/druginfo/uspdi/202101.html#SXX04

God Bless You guys. Please sign Annie’s Guestbook.

Sunday 7/21/2002 Day -12
What a lovely, but hectic day we had today. We spent time worshipping our awesome God and seeing all of our great friends and prayer warriors from Wakefield Valley Bible Church. Pastor Horner recognized Annie and asked us to stand, whereupon he asked for a show of hands from those who were going to pray faithfully for us while we are on this quest. The show of hands brought tears to our eyes, because we know that they each meant it. Annie and I both realize that some many people are praying for her and our family from all over the world that God is really working wonders in our lives. He hears our prayers and we think if He hears enough of them He will heal us and go one to other business, so keep praying hard and LOUD!!

While Annie and Lily took Kyle to Lacrosse camp at St. Mary’s College today, I moved us to our new apartment in Baltimore City where Annie and I will live for the next several months. It’s a beautiful 13th floor unit and we feel as if we are in a hotel. Our wonderful health insurance company is providing this place for us to live as while we get cured. After going to communion

Week of 7/20/2002
What a week this has been. Trying to pack up everything and not to forget anything when you are not taking everything is a real chore, compounded by the fact that I can’t find my TO DO list and have to start over. Annie is doing great and much more calm about things than I am at this point. She has been buttoning down all of the family issues, such as where the children will be and who they will be staying with until October. They have some exciting adventures planned. Lily will be spending the first two weeks with grand mom, which will include a week at the beach! Kyle came home yesterday from a week at Morgan Wooten’s Basketball Camp, which is held every year at Frostburg State University. Coach Wooten is the most famous high school basketball coach in the nation and his teams have won more games then any other coach in over 30 years of coaching. He also holds the distinction of turning down umpteen college and professional coaching offers, (including major financial incentives), to continue to coach the kids. Kyle learned a great deal and earned a super report card. The coach wants him to get his outside game down, and when he does he will be “unstoppable”. I pray that he gets drafted into the NBA before I am too old to enjoy the new Porsche that he promises me. Lily hung out with her local friends and us for most of the week and has been a great help in getting us ready. She will be staying with us Sunday night in our new apartment before leaving for grandmom’s on Monday. Today we are having dinner with Sean and our new daughter-in-law, Jeana, at their new home in Mays Chapel. This is really weird for me to sit at a dinner table and be served great steaks and other goodies by a son who is married. I can’t help but tearing-up when I think about the day Sean was born in 1976, less than 2 pounds but very feisty. He’s weighs a bit more than that today, but he’s just as fiesty. Our other son, the globe-trotting guy that he is, is somewhere in New Mexico with some old college buddies who love life and we expect that Russell will surface sometime soon to say Hi.

7/19/2002
While I stayed home to do some business, Annie and Lily took off for the mountains to pick up Kyle from basketball camp. It was a most uneventful day, which is much to my liking as I am getting too old for all of these eventful that I am having lately..

7/18/2002
We had our final pre BMT evaluation consultation with Dr. Ian Flinn at Johns Hopkins today. After suffering a few worrisome hours over an EKG test result that didn’t look just right we were assured by Dr. Flinn, who also consulted a that Annie’s heart was fine and strong enough to forge ahead. She has a minor condition known as Right Branch Block, which in her case is incomplete and only means that her two “pistons” aren’t firing at the exact same time. http://www.texasheartinstitute.org/bbblock.html
All of her other test results were great!!! Praise God!!!!

7/13/2002

We used some airline tickets that were about to expire and took off for West Palm Beach and Ft. Lauderdale last Saturday. The tickets were from a trip we had planned just before Annie got sick, which forced us to cancel. Can you believe it? It was much cooler in Florida than Baltimore this week. Although it rained a little each day and a lot on Wednesday, it was a great vacation and we had plenty to do even when it was raining. WE also got to put the top down daily, which was kind of cool and the kids really enjoyed the “topless” rides. Annie and the kids, who are TV deprived at home, spent many rain hours channel surfing and watching such soon to be classics as “Sponge Bob Square Pants” and some game show where the contestants try to go up money latter and boot the others off. I think it’s called “Weak Link”. I spent my quality time doing some business and other research, emailing folks, and actually read 6 pages of a novel that I have renewed at least 2 times. The hotel where we stayed had a “free” breakfast buffet every morning until 9:30AM. The kids never made it in time. Annie would always make a last minute dash for coffee with me and to load up stuff for the kids so we didn’t have to pack them off to MacDonald’s. It was a blast. We met some really wonderful folks, who were from New Jersey, and whose son was almost engaged to Ted William’s daughter. This made for some interesting contemporaneous discussions. They had some pretty good Ted stories. We also had a very special lunch at some place on the beach in Ft. Lauderdale next to the Elbo Room, with Annie’s old friend Dave Ingram from her teenage years. Dave was Annie’s camp counselor and today is an Associate Pastor at a beautiful church in Ft. Lauderdale. His daughter was married last week to a young man who plans to study at a seminary next year.

THE HIGHLIGHT of the trip was Annie and Kyle jet skiing for the first time. It was a sight to behold and Annie started out as the driver, but soon found out that wave running is not what she is destined to do in life. So, before total panic set in Kyle wisely pulled the motor plug and took over. I must say he commanded the craft quite beautifully and Annie loved being on the backend.. I will soon have some great pictures of our trip up on the site.

It was back to Baltimore on Friday to get Kyle ready for the first of his 3 camps this summer.

7/04/02
Annie was diagnosed on Valentine’s Day 2002 with Lymphoplasmacytic Lymphoma, which is a rare form of cancer that affects her ability to make blood. The median survival is about 5 years. In some people the disorder may be chronic with few symptoms, unlike Annie who presented her disease at a very advanced stage. She has probably had this disease for several years or more but its slow progression, (indolent), finally caught-up to her on December 17, 2001. (http://www.thedoctorsdoctor.com/diseases/lymphoma_lymphoplasmacytic.htm)

On July 22nd, Annie will enter Johns Hopkins Bone Marrow Transplant Center in Baltimore to begin her quest to be cured of this cancer. On August 2nd she will undergo an Allogeneic Bone Marrow Transplant thanks her loving and perfectly matched brother, Tim Carroll, who is donating his time and bone marrow to Annie for transplanting. (http://www.bmtnews.org/bmt/bmt.book/chapter.4.html)

We are praying that when the transplant is done and after Annie has fully recovered in about 18 months, she will be cured forever from cancer and be able to live a normal life

Update:
On Friday, June 28th we received great news and answered pray!! Annie and Tim, (her brother and donor), have tested negative for Cytomegalovirus. CMV is a virus that roams around the systems of over 50f the population, which under normal circumstances is suppressed by a person’s immune system. When a person undergoes a bone marrow transplant they lose the natural ability to fight all viruses and infections, from the time that their marrow is destroyed and they have “0” immune system, (after high dose chemotherapy), until the engraftment of their new donor system. By Annie and Tim both being for CMV there will be far less risk to her of getting a severe and deadly interstitial pneumonia, which used to account for over 50f all BMT mortality. PTL!!

This 4th of July week was a big one for Tim and Annie who spent two days undergoing many diagnostic tests at Johns Hopkins on Monday and Tuesday. We expect that all of the test results will be in by July 10th and we are praying that the results will be great as expected!! Annie also had a bone marrow biopsy, which will tell us how much cancer remains in her system, if any, and the condition of her marrow at pre-treatment stage.

Annie’s Conditioning and Treatment Schedule:

Thursday, July 18th . Meeting with Dr. Flinn to discuss test results and the transplant.
Monday, July 22nd . Register for program and sign consent forms. Move into our apartment in Baltimore City, where we will live for the 100 days post transplant as Annie is being watched daily for signs of graft rejection.
High dose cytoreductive therapy given before transplantation is designed to eradicate malignant stem cells.
Tuesday, July 23rd . Day -10 (Dy “minus” 10) - Surgery to place the Hickman Catheter. Prior to conditioning, a small flexible tube called a "Hickman" catheter will be inserted into a large vein in Annie’s chest just above the heart. This tube enables the medical staff to painlessly administer drugs and blood products, and to withdraw the hundreds of blood samples required during the course of her treatment without inserting needles into her arms or hands.
Wednesday, July 24th. Conditioning Begins - Day –9 Busulfan 12 hours
Busulfan ( byoo-SUL-fan) belongs to the group of medicines known as alkylating agents. It is used to treat some kinds of cancer lood. It may also be used as a conditioning regimen prior to progenitor cell transplantation for treatment of chronic myelogenous leukemia.
Busulfan seems to act by interfering with the function of the bone marrow. Since the g normal body cells may also be affected by busulfan, other effects may also occur, which may not be serious but may cause concern. Some effects may not occur for months or years after the medicine is used. Potential Side Effects: (http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/druginfo/uspdi/202101.html#SXX18)
Thursday July 25th. Day –8 Busulfan 12 hours

Friday July 26th. Day –7 Busulfan 12 hours

Saturday July 27th. Day –6 Busulfan 12 hours

Sunday July 28th. Day –5 Cytoxan (Cyclophosphamide) 12 hours
Cyclophosphamide (sye-kloe-FOSS-fa-mide ) belongs to the group of medicines called alkylating agents. It is used to treat cancer of the ovaries, breast, blood and lymph system, nerves (found primarily in children), retinoblastoma (a cancer of the eye found primarily in children), multiple myeloma (cancer in the bone marrow), and mycosis fungoides (tumors on the skin). Cyclophosphamide is also used for treatment of some kinds of kidney disease. Cyclophosphamide interferes with the growth of cancer cells, which are eventually destroyed. Since the growth of normal body cells may also be affected by cyclophosphamide, other effects will also occur. Some effects may not occur for months or years after the medicine is used. Potential Side Effects: (http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/druginfo/uspdi/202174.html#SXX21)
Monday July 29th. Day –4 Cytoxan 12 hours

Tuesday July 30th. Day –3 Cytoxan 12 hours

Wednesday July 31st . Day –2 Cytoxan 12 hours

Thursday August 1st Day-1 Rest

Friday August 2nd Day “0” – TRANSPLANT
CYTOMEGALOVIRUS
CMV or cytomegalovirus is a common cause of infection in BMT patients. Approximately 30 percent of patients undergoing a BMT develop a CMV infection, usually during the second or third month following the transplant. CMV infections can develop in several different organs including the liver, colon, eye, and lungs. Although all CMV infections are cause for concern, CMV pneumonia is particularly worrisome because it's usually fatal. A CMV infection in the intestines is often fatal as well. Patients who test positive for CMV prior to transplant are twice as likely to develop a CMV infection post-transplant as those who test negative. Patients undergoing an Allogeneic BMT are more likely to develop a CMV infection than autologous BMT patients, particularly if they receive bone marrow from a mismatched donor.
Approximately 10 to 20 percent of Allogeneic BMT patients develop CMV pneumonia. The risk of developing CMV pneumonia increases with age and among patients with graft-versus-host disease.
Monday, June 24, 2002 at 08:21 PM (CDT)
We learned Annie’s diagnosis from Doctor Flavio Kruter on February 14, 2002, Valentine’s Day, which is Indolent B Cell Lymphoplasmacytic Lymphoma that is sometimes referred to as Waldenström Macroglobulinemia. Her cancer is Stage IV (most advanced), which means it had spread outside of her lymph system to her liver and bone marrow. At the time of her first hospitalization in December 2001, Annie was admitted in severe pain and after her blood was tested we learned that she had critical acute anemia. Her Hematocrit was 14.7 and Hemoglobin was 5.1, indicating that she very few red blood cells and very little oxygen was going to her brain. We later learned that anemia is not a disease but rather a symptom of something else that is wrong. It was presumed that her anemia was being caused by fibroids, but no scans were done by the hospital at this time and after receiving a blood transfusion she got stronger and came home several days later. She had surgery on January 22, 2002 to remove the fibroids, which according to the doctors would cure her anemia and the severe bouts with pain that she was experiencing. However, on February 2, 2002, we again rushed her to the ER presenting the same symptoms as she did on her hospitalization in December. Again she was found to be critically anemic and since she no longer had fibroids and no other reason could be observed for her condition the ER doctor ordered CT scans of her body, whereupon we learned that she appeared to have some form of Lymphoma. The following day Dr. Kruter did a bone marrow biopsy Annie’s, which confirmed the CT scan diagnosis.

It is at this point in time that Annie began a truly awesome quest to be cured of her cancer. Both Annie and I are of great faith and we turn to God for all of our needs, which He has always provided amply. But we know that this journey has and will continue put our faith to its truest test for a long time from now. Since December God has answered so many of our prayers and His love for us is so very evident by how He has given us such great support from friends, family, and our church. But even more dramatically, He has given us peace of mind throughout this most difficult period in our life. After we learned that we must wait on Him, since He is in control, not us, (Psalm 27:14), the more faith that we have shown the greater we have felt His love. God has been truly awesome in what He has done for us thanks to hearing the prayers of literally thousands of people, of all faiths; from all over the world who are praying for us…people we don’t know and people who don’t know us are asking God for His Mercy. This is a tribute to our family and friends who have shown such great faith by asking God to heal Annie.

On June 20th we received the wonderful news and answered prayer that we have not one but three perfect sibling matches our of seven possibilities for an allogeneic bone marrow transplant, an aggressive risky strategy that we have decided to embark upon while Annie, who is in great general health, is in remission from her cancer. We will be entering Johns Hopkins Hospital Bone Marrow Transplant program on July 22nd (day -11), for preparing for a transplant that will occur on August 2nd (day “0”). In the 8 day period preceding day 0, Annie’s immune system will be literally destroyed with chemotherapy to make way for her brother Tim’s bone marrow that will be infused. If Tim’s marrow engrafts with hers and is not later rejected Annie will have a new immune system, identical to Tim’s, which will eradicate any cancer that is still in her body, forever. This is a very dangerous and risky procedure, but after great prayer, very little anguish, and much medical consultation we have decided that a transplant is our only option at achieving long term survivorship. We feel that it is God’s will that this is the way to a cure and we have faith that He will be with us every step of the way.

Today we enter a new chapter in our quest for a cure. This chapter will undoubtedly be long and we will need your continued prayers and help to succeed. God has listened to you and we firmly believe that His ear is always open to all of your prayers for us. We have been overwhelmed by your love as we have been overwhelmed by God’s love. He has not forsaken us.
It is for these reasons and the events that I have cited here that we have made the decision to embark on our journey, one that will require us to be away from our home and family for the next 100 days away, and which will take over two years for Annie to fully recover. We couldn’t make this decision without great faith in God and in each of you and we firmly believe that with your continued love and prayers for us we will be healed. God Bless Each and Every one of You. Annie, Gary, Sean, Russell, Kyle, and Lily.


God’s Provisions

God has provided for all of our needs and has answered so many of our prayers as well as yours since we began our journey. It has been so encouraging for us and our family to see everyone praying for us. Here are just a few of the prayers that we asked you to pray for us, which God has already answered.

1. In February 2002, after beginning her treatments, we prayed that she would respond to the chemotherapy with minimal side effects. During the entire time that she was being treated Annie never got really sick or nauseous. In fact, other than some fatigue and a minor scratchy throat, she had little anticipated side effects. (We did loose our hair, which doesn’t physically hurt but is a very enlightening experience in any event.)
2. In February 2002, we prayed that her chemotherapy would shrink her enlarged liver and spleen and that her cancer would be in remission. After only two CHOP chemotherapy treatments and five of eight planned Rituxan immunotherapy infusions, Annie was deemed to be in complete radiological remission on March 25th! Another miracle to be sure.
3. In April 2002 I learned about her type of cancer being treated and possibly cured by an allogeneic bone marrow transplant (related donor). We asked that God to guide us to the right doctor and hospital to investigate this possibility. Not only did He find us the right program, it was literally an hour away from our home at Johns Hopkins Medical Institution. Through a cancellation of someone else’s appointment God enabled us to immediately see Dr. Ian Flinn, Johns Hopkins Chief of Lymphoma, who along with their Pathology department reviewed all of Annie’s medical data and did new studies to confirm her diagnosis. When we met with him to review the results of the diagnosis he confirmed LPL, but he also advised us that with using only standard chemotherapy treatment Annie would not live to be an “old woman”. Dr. Flinn felt that our only option to our palliative treatment approach and to achieve a cure was to attempt a bone marrow transplant. His clinical studies as ell as those of other institutions revealed that the BMT procedure becomes more dangerous the longer we wait as she is treated with toxic chemotherapy during inevitable subsequent relapses. In fact, a 15ortality rate for all BMT patients in first remission rises to 57fter a second relapse; odds we aren’t willing to take. Again we have committed this decision to God to gain His wisdom and to determine if this approach is His will.
4. One of the things we have learned throughout our journey is that if you give a carpenter a hammer, everything looks like a nail, so we were somewhat suspect of Dr. Flinn’s approach. His way of treating our type of cancer is a BMT, just as a surgeon’s way to treat disease is through surgery. We continued to pray for an answer.
5. Our Oncologist, Dr. Flavio Kruter, who himself was answered prayer for a wise counselor, recommended that we try to get an opinion from the opposite school of thought. Dr. Kruter said he would try to speak with Dr. George Canellos, (Chief of Lymphoma, Dana Farber Cancer Institute, who is also a Professor at the Harvard School of Medicine). Dr. Canellos is world famous and literally has written the standard medical school textbook on Lymphoma. Getting his ear would probably prove difficult for me, but it was a snap for God. I wrote the following email to him and on the very next day I received a call from Dr. Canellos.

May 26, 2002
Dear Dr. Canellos,
Dr. Flavio Kruter, (Carroll County Maryland Cancer Center) is my wife's oncologist and has suggested that I contact you as a top Lymphoma expert. He thinks that you may be able to give us some good insight into my wife's treatment pursuant to our consideration of an Allogeneic BMT. We met recently with Dr Ian Flinn of Johns Hopkins, who specializes in BMT and after reviewing Anne's history, tests, scans, and diagnosis suggested that an Allo BMT is the best curative course of action for her disease. He also had new slides done to review her diagnosis due to some concern he had as to its accuracy. I am including a brief chronological history and will supply any additional data that you require. We would very much like to make an appointment to meet with you and gain your opinion, which we really need so that we can make a better decision.

Dr. Flinn feels that considering her history, Annie's prognosis is "Fair". This is in conflict with Annie's previous Dx prognosis of "Good". Dr. Flinn was also concerned that although she appears in CR, she most likely is not in CR and she should have more CHOP. As such, we began two more cycles on 5/13. He also said that based on her diagnosis he may have treated her initially with a different protocol, (Fludarbine), but it did seem to him that the CHOP was working. (Perhaps the alternate may give rise to longer remissions?)

In Dr. Flinn's opinion Annie will not live to be an "old woman" with standard treatment and he feels that if were are able to get a match from one of Annie's 7 healthy siblings, the best course of treatment would be an immediate ALLO BMT, especially if she is in remission now. This is very aggressive according to Dr. Kruter, and he felt that we should speak to you about our options. Annie is extremely strong and has never has been prone to any illnesses and also heals very quickly, (same day discharge from hospital after births and up and running normal after a few days post Hysterectomy), which I am sure Dr. Flinn has taken into account in his opinion. But Allo BMT's are risky, too.

I love my wife very much and want her to have the best of care, which in my mind means getting at least a second opinion about her prognosis and global treatment strategy. I would consider it an honor if you would find some precious time for us in your schedule. I can be reached at any time at 410-916-4316 or by return mail. Dr. Flavio Kruter can be reached at 410-751-6066 and Dr. Ian Flinn can be reached at 410-614-4557.

Regards,
Gary Gamber


5/27/02 Dr. Canellos’ comments:
1. Annie has “0” chance of Long Term Survival with conventional treatment considering today’s protocols as well as those that he sees on the horizon in her life expectancy.
2. Annie is young and appears to be strong and of Great Spirit.
3. “Cure” has not been statistically proven through clinical studies, except he did cite a foreign study that is out or about to be released, which contains some data.
4. Annie’s LPL is rare at age 41. There is very little data at all on persons her age with LPL.
5. Annie is sensitive to therapy, which is a plus factor that Dr. Flinn also pointed out, (which was the basis of his study).
6. We feared that her CHOP Rituxan treatment protocol vs. other protocols was not the best for long term remission, but Dr. Canellos felt that it was “6 in 1, half dozen in other”
7. A riskier High Dose BMT vs. a Mini low dose BMT is a better choice as it will kill the Lymphoma in her system and probably help her better achieve long term survivorship.
8. Acute GVHD and ChronicGVHD are life threatening risks, but the better the match the lower the risk
9. Dr. Canellos feels that JHMI has the BMT experience and will provide top care
10. A personal consultation with him would not add any real value
11. Bottom Line…if we are willing to take the risk, it’s probably a good chance she will have better than a 50/50 chance of pulling through without major complications, so it’s totally in our court if we want to go for it.

Anne Gamber, History:
Age 41, in great health and fitness. Looks and acts like a 25 year old woman. Two children; ages 13 and 11; 7 siblings. Dx: Indolent Stage 4 Small B Cell Lymphoplasmacytic Lymphoma Extra Nodal Bone Marrow and Liver BM involvement 40expressed of B-Symptoms (Night Sweats, Lack of Energy, Unexplained Weight Loss in excess of 10n less than 60 days, Acute Critical Anemia)
12/17/01 Admitted to Carroll County ER with severe upper leg pain. CBC disclosed critical anemia. Sonogram disclosed large fibroid in uterus. WBC- 3.1 RBC 1.78 Hct-14.7 Hgb-5.1 RDW-18.4 Plt -94.0 MPV- 7.1 Lymp.0 Mono1.1 Gran9.7
On 12/18 received a 2 Unit RBC transfusion, condition stabilized and she was sent home
12/19/01 UMMS Gynecological Surgeon examined CBC fibroid. He did not feel it was necessary to have a hematologist opinion since her CBC numbers were up since 12/18/01. Actually, she wasn’t making blood and her counts were only better due to the transfusion.
1/22/02 Complete Hysterectomy performed
2/03/02 Admitted in ER with severe upper leg pain. After several examinations for various other conditions, the ER doctor ordered CT Scans, which indicated Lymphoma.
2/05/02 Bone Marrow Biopsy CCGH by Flavio Kruter
2/14/02 Dx - Indolent Stage 4 Small B Cell Lymphoplasmacytic Lymphoma Extra Nodal Bone Marrow and Liver BM involvement 40BR>2/18/02 LYCHOP-R treatment – 2 Cycles CHOP (every three weeks) 8 Weeks Rituxan
3/25/02 (Post 2 x's CHOP and 5X Rituxan) CT Scan showed radiological complete remission. Spleen decreased from 1800 to 1260 and all other nodes were normal
4/29/02 - Consulted with Dr. Ian Flinn:
1. “The CBC numbers and the 40M involvement lead me to believe that the Spleen was destroying the RBC's and the problem is not in the bone marrow.”
2. “Additional pathological studies should be done to check diagnosis”
5/10/02 - DX LPL affirmed by Hopkins Pathology using slides made from tissue blocks

Read Journal History

Hospital Information:

Anne C. Gamber
900 Clauser Ct.
New Windsor, Maryland 21176
410-840-3610

Links:

E-mail Author: agamber_61@yahoo.com

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Note: The foregoing information was authored by the patient, parent or guardian, or other parties who are solely responsible for the content. Such announcements or their content are not necessarily endorsed by CaringBridge, Inc. or any sponsoring agent. This information does not confirm that anyone is or was actually a patient at any facility.